Shady Parakoopa's Many Minions: Interview Edition, reported by Shady Parakoopa

And that's all my crazy minions. Yup, my imagination is a weapon of mass destruction. I blame the schools with their boring lectures that cause my mind to wonder. Well, goodnight, folks! Drive safely… or not. Your choice.

Shady Demonic Parakoopa
Nickname: Shady
First Appeared In: SHADY PARAKOOPA interviews BUB-ULB
Description: A Shady Paratroopa with a black 1-Up T-shirt who wears his shades on his head
Gender: Male
Age: 19
Species: 1/2 Shady Paratroopa, 1/2 Demon
Relatives: Shavilo Scythe Parakoopa
Job: Boss, Main Interviewer
IQ: Below average because he likes the banging head on the wall game
Weapon: Blaze, Shell Shot, Wing Blade zanpakutô hidden in his microphone
Weakness: Has 0 fighting skills.
Likes: Money, making Interviews.
Dislikes: Actually doing Interviews, Pokemon (you can tell I'm serious because I didn't use the right e)
People he Likes: Everyone in his crew especially Blaze, Lemmy
Because: Likes his crew because he does not want to be on their bad sides; Blaze because he was his first friend; Lemmy because he gives him the money
People he Dislikes: Everyone in his crew especially Yux, Fans, Shavilo, IRS
Because: Hates his crew because they're so demanding. "We need food!" “We need electricity!" “We need to call a doctor!" Hates the fans for the same reason. Hates Yux for no reason at all. Hates Shavilo because he's still mad about the whole murdering their parents thing. Do I need to explain the IRS?
Life Story: Shady was born into a demon family that lived over a thousand years and were very mean to him. One day a traveling salesman sold Shady a microphone that was secretly a zanpakutô, a magical transforming sword. And it was on sale! Sweet! Using it, he slaughtered his evil demon parents and injured Shavilo. With his newly gained freedom, he wanted to travel the world, but soon learned that he needed money. By making a fake interviewer license out of cardboard and crayons, he was able to get an Interview job from Lemmy. Now all he wants to do is see the world and have the fun that he was denied for the first five years of his life.
Author's Note: Shady is supposed to be Homer Simpson-ish, but with his own soul. I wish I were more like Shady… not the whole slightly retarded thing, the whole funny without even trying thing. Oh, and I know it's suppose to be Paratroopa, but I did Parakoopa to be original.

Mary Sis Hammer
Nickname: Hammer Sis
First Appeared In: SHADY PARAKOOPA interviews BUB-ULB as the Hammer Bro who kept on popping up in the Interviews every day, but this changed in SHADY PARAKOOPA interviews HAMMER BRO, when she was forced to join.
Description: A Hammer Bro with no helmet, pink shell and shoes, and long red hair
Gender: Female
Age: 19
Species: Hammer Bro
Relatives: Mil Sledge Hammer
Job: Used to be Lemmy's lackey, now she's Second-in-Command Interviewer and
the voice of reason
IQ: Slightly above average
Weapon: Two hammers, abnormal strength, badges
Weakness: Doesn't wear the helmet
Likes: Taking life easy
Dislikes: People who stress her out, people who think she's crazy because she can see Intern's deaths
People she Likes: Intern, Slim
Because: She likes Intern because she is the only other girl on this show; likes Slim because he has a familiar friendly aura… yeah, right
People she Dislikes: Shady, Yux, retards
Because: Shady's a moron; Yux smells funny; retards stress her out, so Shady stresses her out
Life Story: Hammer Sis used to live with her brother Mil, but one day their parents got divorced and she never saw Mil again. She was determined to see her brother again. She trained hard to become Lemmy's lackey who goes around and makes sure everybody is following the rules. She hoped that all that travel would help her find her long lost brother, but sadly she ran into Shady and was forced to join. As time passed, she decided to stay with this Interview show in hopes of finding him, and Lemmy fired her for being three months late.
Author's note: Hammer Sis is like Shady but not as funny and more serious, but not by much.

Blaze Seymour Elemental
Nickname: Blaze
First Appeared In: Like most the crew, in SHADY PARAKOOPA interviews BUB-ULB
Description: A red Lava Bubble who can summon flouting flaming claws; has a paper-thin red death hand hidden deep within his fiery body
Gender: In death, neutral; in life, male
Age: Died at age 1, was awakened by Shady four years ago; the date of his death is unknown.
Species: A Lava Bubble in death, unknown in life
Relatives: Unknown… starting to notice a pattern?
Job: Bodyguard, chef, substitute interviewer
IQ: Average
Weapon: Fiery body, fire control, darkness channeled through his death hand
Weakness: Ice, not knowing his past, the red death hand is his weak point (So strike it for massive damage!), limited to four words per sentence, sometimes five
Likes: Having a home with a large family
Dislikes: Not being able to hug, being used as the key player in a shadowy war, Yoshis
People he Likes: Shady, Hammer Sis, Intern
Because: Shady woke him from his slumber and gave him a home; Hammer Sis practices fighting with him and actually likes his food; Intern is… well… his close friend if you catch my drift
People he Dislikes: Slim, Yux, Phone, Yoshis, icy monsters, the Shadow Queen, Shadoo, Magiblot… pretty much everyone
Because: He just doesn't trust Slim; Yux and the phone are annoying; Yoshis trigger angry thoughts from his past; icy monsters like to take advantage of his element weakness; the Shadow Queen and Shadoo are trying to turn him into their killing machine; Magiblot knows about his past but refuses to tell him
Life Story: He doesn't know it himself. After Shady ditched out on his edumacation at age 15, he returned to his parents’ old house to see if he can steal anything. That's when he went down to their basement to find a grave with a nameless tombstone. Upon approaching it, the spirit of the dead person was awakened. This is how Shady met Blaze. Blaze doesn't have the slightest idea who he was except that he was good at cooking stuff. He does though have recurring nightmares about his past. It has been revealed
that because of his death hand, Blaze is destined to read the Dark Prognosticus and become the new Shadow Prince. Even though ruling the Realm of Shadows with an iron fist may sound like a good deal, it would force him to become either the Shadow Queen's or Shadoo's minion, which is not cool.
Author's Note: Blaze is the mirror image of my youngest sibling: wild, uncontrollable, and very destructive. He also’s suppose to be an anti-Pink, hating Yoshis instead of loving them.

Nickname: Slim
First Appeared In: CANDIDATES interview GOOMBA
Description: A Koopa with anime-like line eyes who always has a freaky smile on his face (think Gin Ichimaru from Bleach… look it up); he also wears small reading glasses and a dark red shell
Gender: Male
Age: 19
Species: 75% Koopa, 25% Hammer Bro
Relatives: Unknown.
Job: Know it all, cameraguy, inventor, demon summoner, mass murderer
IQ: A mega smartypants, but he's @#$%& crazy!
Weapon: Two butcher knives, bare hands, other people's body parts, demons in his head, demonic powers
Weakness: Shavilo, the main demon in his head, likes to take over his body every now and then; when Shavilo takes over Slim's body, the slightest sight of Hammer Sis will cause him to pass out and open a black hole to the Realm of Shadows.somehow
Likes: Being @#$% crazy! The sight of blood, the screams of the innocent, the torture of thousands, and, obviously, killing things
Dislikes: Having his memories replaced with Shavilo's, not killing something at least once per Interview
People he Likes: Hammer Sis, Intern, dead people
Because: Hammer Sis reminds him of someone, but he doesn't know whom; killing Intern never gets dull to him; dead people are so much fun to play with: you can stack them, rearrange them, or burn them, just like Legos!
People he Dislikes: Shavilo, Shady, Blaze, Yux, Lemmy
Because: Shavilo won't let him kill Shady; Blaze is made out of fire and is already dead; apparently if he were to kill Yux, his remains would form a black hole of never-ending randomness; and if he were to kill Lemmy, then thousands would come to seek revenge
Life Story: All Slim really knows is that he lived most of his life in a crazy house since he was a little kid with a craving for blood. His only friend was Shavilo, the demon who escaped to Slim's head when Shady almost killed him. The only memories Slim had were of growing up with Shady as a younger brother, but these were Shavilo's memories mixed in with his own. Using his self taught knowledge, he was able to escape the crazy house and go on a killing spree. Besides killing everything for fun, Slim's other objective was to find Shady, because Shavilo's anger for him transferred to him. After gaining a role on Shady's show, Shavilo took over his body in an attempt to kill Shady. This attempt failed and now Slim knows that he isn't Shady's brother. Will Slim ever discover his past? The real question is, does he want to know?
Author's Note: Slim is the mirror image of my second youngest brother, who is very smart for his age... but @#$% crazy! Oh, and Slim's original name was going to be Slick. This explains why his name accidentally changes to Slick during SHADY interviews DOOPLISS.

Failed X-Yux Experiment #64
Nickname: Yux
First Appeared In: SHADY interviews YUX, but really first appeared in chapter 2 of Shadow Paper Mario: Rods of the Crystal Stars
Description: A paper-thin X-Yux that is actually green instead of red; has only three points instead of four, but a paper-thin wizard like hat acts like the missing point, and he wears an eye patch over where his right eye should be; his Mini-Yuxs are blue and also have one eye; they can also talk for some reason.
Gender: Neutral.
Age: 7. Isn't he such a cute little rascal?!
Species: X-Yux
Relatives: Other Yuxes, X-Nauts, Tileoids (were made by the same scientists), and Barribads (look at the faces)
Job: Ticket guy, detective guy, and random guy
IQ: Average
Weapon: Fire instead of electric rings, the Randomizer, Mini-Yuxs, and can become a saw blade when he spins around
Weakness: Everyone hates him, the Randomizer, used to not know how to read but now he does
Likes: Being alone
Dislikes: Being with people
People Yux Likes: Himself… what?
Because: He's the only one he can trust… or can he?
People Yux Dislikes: Everyone
Because: Everyone hates him for some reason; at least this lets him have his own catchphrase. I HATE YOU ALL!
Life Story: Yux's anger for everyone originates from when he was born. Since he was a reject X-Yux, the X-Nauts ignored him and the Yuxes made fun of him. Soon came the day where he was accidentally sent to the Boggly Woods to look for the star. When Mario got the star there and everyone retreated, Yux was left behind. It was there that he went to college, even though he didn't know how to read. He stayed there for many years until Bowser Jr. and Shadow Mario found him in the FF. After the events of the Shadow Paper Mario story, Yux found himself alone, able to read, and filthy stinking rich with the power of the Randomizer. Life was sweet until someone stole his wallet and he was thrown in the same prison as Shady for crimes against Fun Fiction.
Author's Note: The Randomizer is a special skill I use in a lot of my work. By calling out its name, something totally random will happen, but there's always good news and a bad news. Oh, and Yux is based on my third youngest sibling, who suffers extreme middle child syndrome and thus will do the most random things for attention.

Intern Interning Net
Nickname: Intern
First Appeared In: She's been around since the beginning, but she first showed up in SHADY interviews BOO
Description: Think Toadette, but with her pink color changed to white and the white spots changed to black; also, she wears a simple white shirt with the word "Intern" on it in black letters
Gender: Female
Age: 16
Species: A Toad… or a Toadette, if you consider that a species
Relatives: She is the daughter of the wealthy and "childless" Net family.
Job: Slave work like fetching people drinks, mowing lawns, taking a bullet or two for Shady, and tons of other demeaning stuff
IQ: Hard to tell, but probably slightly above average
Weapon: Her stealthy rouge skills, nerdcore items like Light Zappers, Wiimotes, and Lightsabers.
Weakness: Has a habit of dieing… a lot; is mute
Likes: Being helpful, playing video games
Dislikes: Dieing.a lot, being mute.
People she Likes: Hammer Sis, Blaze, and basically everyone but the people on the dislikes list
Because: Hammer Sis is the only other girl; Blaze plays video games with her, even if he does toast all the controllers
People she Dislikes: Shady, Slim, Yux
Because: Shady is very mean to her; Slim plays too rough with her on purpose; Yux ignores her
Life Story: Intern's parents obviously don't care about her, as can be seen from when they publicly announced that they were childless. After accidentally smashing a priceless pot, her parents paid a traveling freakshow to take her off their hands forever. Yup, that traveling freakshow was Shady and Blaze.
Author's Note: Ok, this may be hard to believe, but Intern is the mirror image of me. My close friends will agree with me on this one. When I meet new people, I act quiet but I will still be helpful, just like Intern. When I get to know them better, I'll start to talk a little more and I'll become like Hammer Sis. Eventually, I'll act more friendly and less serious, like Shady.
Hammer Sis's Note: Ok, just hear me out for a sec. INTERN IS A ZOMBIE! No
one will believe me, but she has died more then once. I've seen it with my
own eyes but people just call me crazy! I'm not crazy! That's Slim's job.

Shady: … Ok. Is there anyone here who doesn't have a tragic childhood?

Yux: Well I feel that mine was pretty good.

Shady: Shut up Yux.

Yux: …

Shavilo Scythe Parakoopa
Nickname: Shavilo
First Appeared In: SHADY interviews SKELLOBIT
Description: A Shady Koopa with one bat wing who wears a spiked shell
Gender: Demon Male
Age: 1020
Species: 99% Demon, 1% Shady Paratroopa
Relatives: Shady Demonic Parakoopa
Job: Slim's demon guardian, Shady's destroyer
IQ: Very high
Weapon: Red scythe, demonic powers, demon slaves like Max the dead random
Weakness: Shares a body with Slim; read Slim's weaknesses because I'm too lazy to scroll all the way to the top, copy it, then scroll all the way back here and paste it.
Likes: Read Slim's likes
Dislikes: Sharing a body with Slim
People he Likes: Other demons
Because: They are his loyal followers
People he Dislikes: Shady
Because: Dude… he killed his folks. Not cool.
Life Story: Shavilo was the only child of a strong demon family, which caused and control all the wars and conflicts on Plit. These bloody battles were happy childhood memories for Shavilo. He was very happy with his unholyness. This was until the day when Shavilo's parents decided to create another child so they could control all four corners of the world together. But instead of a new eternal demon, they had the very much mortal Shady instead. For ruining his parents’ plans, Shavilo hated Shady and was
very mean to him. After years of abuse, Shady got his revenge on his demon family, and wounded Shavilo. Shady's weapon destroyed Shavilo's body, but left his spirit to roam the earth until he found a young Koopa to reside in. The young Koopa's mind warped from Shavilo's anger and the Koopa became Slim.
Author's Note: A combination of all my little siblings. EVIL!

Renaldo Amigo Blot
Nickname: Magiblot
First Appeared In: SHADY interviews MAGIBLOT
Description: A Magiblot who rapidly changes colors.
Gender: ??
Age: ??
Species: Magiblot
Relatives: Other Shadow creatures
Job: Blaze's spirit guide, Keeper of Blaze's past, and other cool-sounding mysterious stuff
IQ: Depends; Does calling everyone his friend mean he's stupid, or is he slowly and skillfully turning them into crazy zombies? Probably the latter
Weapon: Shadow magic, teleporting between dimensions
Weakness: Staying in the light realm too long
Likes: Being mysterious, calling people his friend
Dislikes: The war between the Shadow Queen and Shadoo
People Magiblot Likes: Blaze
Because: He and Blaze go way back, even if Blaze doesn't remember
People Magiblot Dislikes: The Shadow Queen, Shadoo
Because: They’re causing many of his kind to sacrifice themselves for a pointless cause
Life Story: Magiblot used to be a loyal servant to the Shadow Queen, but after seeing the destruction she could cause, he went over to Shadoo's side. Shadoo may have acted different from the Shadow Queen, but he had the same intension: bloody wars. Magiblot stays on Shadoo's side, but only as a cover. He knows that Blaze is the main pawn that will tip the balance between the two forces, and he's Underwhere bent on keeping him away from both sides
Author's Note: Never thought I would add him to the cast, but he helped me get my first Tourists’ Choice, so he's in.

Buddy Ethan Bub-ulb
Nickname: Buddy
First Appeared in: SHADY PARAKOOPA interviews BUB-ULB
Description: A Bub-ulb with blue pedals
Gender: Male
Age: 15, but is currently dead
Species: Bub-ulb
Relatives: Other beings of the earth
Job: Second in command interviewer, then cameraboo after he died; now he's in permanent retirement
IQ: Average
Weapon: Daisy's tennis racket
Weakness: Fire; this is why he and Blaze could never be friends
Likes: Flowers
Dislikes: Being dead
People he Likes: Amazee Dayzees
Because: They're his brothers from a different mother
People he Dislikes: Shady
Because: He got him killed
Life Story: He was a peaceful flower who didn't want to do anything else but soak up sunbeams in Petalburg. He probably would have stayed in his peaceful life if he hadn't met Shady, who asked him if he wanted to help him a little bit. This fellowship ended in him falling off a floating block to his death, by accident of course. *shifty eyes* He was given a job as a cameraboo though until the Ghostbusters got him.
Author's Note: Something I would like to explain is that in the second Interview, Bub-ulb's name changed to Buddy for no reason. I was new to the site, so when I sent in my first Interview I forgot to put down who made it. When Lemmy asked who it was from, I decided to resend the whole thing with the "By Shady Parakoopa" at the top and with four new questions, jokes, and the explanation of why Bub-ulb's name changed to Buddy. I neglected to tell Lemmy about these changes so they were never put in. Hey, it was my very first post on Lemmy's land, give me a break.

Paratroopa Kyle Koopa
Nickname: Paratroopa
First Appeared In: SHADY PARAKOOPA interviews PARATROOPA
Description: A simple red Paratroopa
Gender: Male
Age: 16
Species: Paratroopa
Relatives: Other Koopas
Job: Second in command interviewer, then cameraboo after he died; now he's in permanent retirement
IQ: A little bit below average
Weapon: Shell Shot
Weakness: The dreaded double jump
Likes: Soaring through the sky
Dislikes: Being grounded
People he Likes: Shadow Mario
Because: He was going to make him a member of the FF crew if he handed Shady over to him
People he Dislikes: Shady
Because: He got him killed after almost handing him over to Shadow MarioLife Story: Paratroopa liked soaring through the air all day until he stumbled onto Shady and was asked to join his crew. When Shadow Mario found him, he asked Paratroopa to hand Shady over to him so he could finish Shadow Paper Mario: Rods of the Crystal Stars. When Paratroopa handed Shady over, he understood his mistake and helped him escape, only to get himself killed in the process. Like Buddy, he was given a job as a cameraboo until the Ghostbusters got him
Author's Note: Paratroopa's point of existing was to show people that I knew that their names were Paratroopa, not Parakoopa.

Noki Thomas Shellfish
Nickname: Noki
First Appeared In: SHADY PARAKOOPA interviews NOKI
Description: He's the Nokis’ elder from Super Mario Sunshine; look it up yourself
Gender: Male
Age: 98
Species: Noki
Relatives: Other Nokis
Job: Second in command interviewer, then cameraboo after he died; now he's
in permanent retirement
IQ: He has an elder's wisdom, whatever that's worth
Weapon: Seashell Shot
Weakness: Lightning or something
Likes: Water
Dislikes: Swimming in polluted water (save the planet, people,.or I'll @#$% kill you!)
People he Likes: Other Nokis
Because: They’re all his children
People he Dislikes: Shady
Because: Because he's a slavedriving, money hugging, and a no good son of a Goomba
Life Story: After helping Mario out in Super Mario Sunshine, he stayed at the bay for a while and relaxed there until Shady came and asked him for an Interview. You can probably guess what happened next.
Author's Note: I honestly have no idea what I was thinking when I made this character.

Dark Hats Mathew Yoshi uno dos, tres
Nickname: Dark Yoshi 123
First Appeared In: DARK YOSHI 123 interviews BOWSER
Description: A dark-skinned Yoshi with a white belly and flaming wings
Gender: Male
Age: 18
Species: Yoshi
Relatives: Light Yoshi 321
Job: Seat filler, Sandwich stealer, rarely an interviewer on his own show
IQ: So smart that his IQ number went all the way around and restarted at zero (I was paid to say that)
Weapon: Keyblade (yup, I was paid to say that too), al he has to do is snap his fingers to summon a new cameraman
Weakness: Kryptonite
Likes: Skateboarding
Dislikes: Dislikes people who copy his elder brother's work
People he Likes: His reborn dead friend Bowser (yeah, I don't get it either) and Shady’s Interview crew, even Yux (yep, Dark Yoshi 123 is officially crazy)
Because: Read his very short Interview series. SUBLIMINAL AVERTISEMENT
People he Dislikes: The people he likes
Because: They smell funny
Life Story: Born and put up for adoption, his parents are unknown. At the age of 12 he started skateboarding to rebel. At 13 he started to ask too many questions. 5 years later he still skates - seriously, that's all he's done besides eat and sleep for the last 5 years. Now he interviews, DUH.
Author's Note: Made by my little brother, who says that it's really just his life story besides the adoption part and being 18. All right, it’s just basically the fact that he skates a lot, I mean a lot.

The Ignorables
Nicknames: Mr. and Mrs. Ignorable
First Appeared In: Mr. Ignorable appeared in HAMMER SIS interviews BONECHILL. Mrs. Ignorable appeared in HAMMER SIS AND INTERN interview THE SHADOW SIRENS.
Descriptions: Disembodied voices
Gender: Do I really need to say it?
Age: Both are 34
Species: Is disembodied voice a species?
Relatives: Grandpa and Grandma Ignorable
Jobs: To shout out the important details at the beginning of the Interviews
IQs: IQ? What's that?
Weapon: The ability to be ignored
Weakness: People paying attention to them (So you’re killing them, Joshua! KILLING THEM!!!)
Like: Being ignored
Dislike: Long conversations
People they Like: Each other
Because: There was a reason for them getting married
People they Dislike: Each other
Because: Mr. Ignorable never listens to Mrs. Ignorable
Life Stories: To honor their way of being ignored, let’s just forget the life story, ok?
Author's Note: I hated always counting my Interviews over and over again to see when I was getting close to a big number, so I made this counting system.

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