The Mysterious Mr. Little

By Golden Road

It was a peaceful day in the Mushroom Kingdom. Mario, Luigi, Peach, Toad, and Yoshi were all having lunch.

Mario: It's-a me, Mario!

Luigi: Is that all you can say?

Mario: It's-a me, Mario!

Toad: He's a #$#@& idiot!

Peach: Toad! Be kind, now! No need to curse, just say he's a regular idiot.

Toad: He's a regular #$#@&!

Peach: Toad, Toad, Toad, that is not what I told you you call him! Shame on you!

Toad: Yeah, yeah.

Yoshi: Yoshi hungry!

Luigi: You already ate all of your pasta, and mine!

Toad: You ate all of mine too!

Peach: Actually, Mario ate yours, Toad.

Toad: #$@&~@ him!

Mario: It-a looks like-a rain.

Peach: That's no rain cloud, that's the doomship!

Mario: Good, it hasn't rained in ages.

Yoshi: Can Yoshi eat Mario?

Toad: Fine with me!

Peach: Toad! Any- LOOK OUT!

Peach spotted enemies flying out of the doomship. But then she noticed...

Peach: Bloobers?! They're attacking us with Bloobers? We're not even in water!

Luigi: Something's-a strange, Peach.

Toad: Yeah, there's those #@$&% Bloobers coming for us.

Luigi: Bloobers can't even touch us if we stay on the ground. How stupid!

Mario: Aha! It's raining!

Luigi:  hat rain?

The Bloobers came in closer, picked up the five, and brought them to the doomship.

Luigi: What's-a going on here?

Mario: I'm flying! Wheee!

Peach: We're being abducted by flying squid!

Toad: I'll never eat $@&# squid again!

Yoshi: Help Yoshi! Help Yoshi!

The Bloobers dropped the five into the cabin of the ship. There was a chair facing away from them, and only a large metal glove could be seen.

Luigi: Is- is that Dr. Claw?

Voice from Behind the Chair: (in a deep French accent) No, you idiot! I am MR. LITTLE!

Toad: Oh, Mr. Little, oh I'm shaking in my shoes! Whatever shall we do?

Mr. Little: You shall perish.

Mario: Darn. Can we at least eat first?

Mr. Little: Fools! You will not die yet. First-

Peach headed for an exit but was stopped by Bloobers.

Mr. Little: Bloobers, hold them all tight. They shall not escape. Death is coming soon but not yet! First, we must attack Koopa Castle! Whoohoohaahaa!

Meanwhile, back at Koopa Castle...

Morton: And now, ladies and Koopamen, boys and ghouls, and anyone else I may have neglected to mention, it is now time for me to give my wonderful, exciting, glorious, Koopariffic speech about-

Wendy: Get on with it!

Morton: Well so-rry!

Wendy: Can't I just go and put on my makeup, Dad?

Bowser: No! Believe it or not, this is actually an important speech for us, that can help us in the future. At least one of you isn't complaining.

Susan: That's right Uncle Bowser! Why can't your kids look up to me as their obviously superior role model?

Bowser: I don't know.

Suddenly, Kamek appeared in a puff of smoke in front of Bowser.

Bowser: Kamek! You'd better have a good reason to interrupt!

Kamek: It's dire, sire. There is a large doomship outside-

Bowser: Yeah, I know. There're eight of them!

Kamek: Nine, sire, one of which is being used right at this moment.

Bowser: Morton, I'm sorry, but we'll have to do this later. I want you all in the throne room, while I check this out! Kamek, you're in charge until I get back!

Kamek: Yes, sire.

Bowser left the castle, while the rest went to the throne room.

Morton: Can I start my speech here?

Roy: You do, and I'll pound you so much.

Susan: Come on Roy, don't be so hard on him. It was a simple question.

Roy: Don't make me punch you too!

Susan gives Roy a severe blow, and he's knocked cold.

Morton: I can't believe you did that to protect me.

Susan: No, I like Larry, remember (she asks, winking at Morton)?

Morton: Oh yeah.

Kamek: Just behave, all of you.  Just at least until your father gets back.

Seven hours passed.


Kamek: Shut up already, Wendy! You've been whining the last seven hours!

Wendy: But my makeup's running! I just need to go back to my bedroom to put more on!

Kamek: But your father ordered me to keep you in here.

Wendy: Well I'm not taking it any more! I'm going to my room and you can't stop me!

Kamek: FINE! GO! Good riddance. At least Morton fell asleep. ROY!

Roy: Yes, Kamek?

Kamek: Stop beating up on Lemmy.

Roy: I'm gonna' be mad if I can't-

Kamek:  Beat up Larry.

Larry: What?!

Roy went over and beat up Larry.


Kamek rushed to Wendy's room.

Kamek: Wendy! What is it?!

Wendy: I ran out of red nail polish! BUY ME MORE! NOW!!!

Kamek left Wendy's room back into the throne room.

Kamek: I hate that daughter of his.

Roy: I don't blame you a bit.


Kamek: Not this time, Wendy. Save yourself.


Roy: Bloobers... one of her words for pimples.

Kamek: I am worried about your father though... I don't understand what is taking him so long to get back in here. I'm going to go check up on him. Roy, keep beating up Larry while I'm gone!

Roy: Can-do!

Kamek keft, and Roy continued beating up Larry.

Roy: Good. Kamek's gone! Larry, dungeon time!

Larry: Please no, Roy!

Roy threw Larry in the dungeon.

Roy: That was fun. Now who can--


Roy: That's it! I'm going to throw some bricks at him!

Roy rushed down to the dungeon, and shortly after returned back up.

Roy: THIS is not good, guys.

Lemmy: What is it?

Roy: Larry is not in his cell.

Lemmy: He must've escaped.

Roy: No way! You can't escape these cells! Unless someone let him out!

Lemmy: What about Wendy? Do we know where she is?

Roy: You know what Lemmy?

Lemmy: What?


Lemmy fell off his ball.

Lemmy: Do you need to be so loud?

Roy: I do if I want to knock you off your ball. Anyway, I'm going to get me a soda. You want one too, Lemmy?

Lemmy: Sure Roy!

Roy: Then come with me! And you're going first!

Meanwhile, back on the doomship...

Huh, there's nothing here. Oh wait, this is the wrong doomship. Let's go to the doomship with Mr. Little, howabout?

Mr. Little: I am getting closer and closer to what I want! Total control of the planet Plit! And I shall soon have it!

Bowser: You are so dead when I get out of here!

Mr. Little: Bloobers, hold his mouth shut! I'm tired of hearing that ugly one talk. And just kill the really ugly one right now, I can't stand the sight of that female hairless freak.

Wendy: PLEASE DON'T KILL ME! I'll do anything! Need an assistant in world domination? I'm your girl! Just don't kill me!

Mr. Little: You are correct, I must have patience. I must not kill you yet.

Peach: Who are you, Mr. Little?

Mr. Little: If I've told you once, I've told you twice! I am an ancient skilled warrier from ancient times! I always had an intent on ruling Plit for an eternity, but I was burned at the stake. But now, I am back from the dead, and I shall have my revenge! Oh, and Bloobers, beat up on Larry please. He just annoys me.

Two more Bloobers flew in, carrying Roy and Lemmy.

Mr. Little: Ah, more visitors I see. I am so happy to see you!

Lemmy: How can you see us when you're not looking at us?

Mr. Little: I SEE ALL! Don't think I can't see your putrid selves over there just because I am not looking in that direction! It is almost time for you to perish, anyway. All I need is Morton, Iggy, and Ludwig, and then, it will be time.

Two more Bloobers flew in, carrying Iggy and Ludwig.

Mr. Little: Ah, I see my collection is almost complete! Bloobers! Morton is the only Koopaling left. I want you to bring him to me immediately!

The Bloobers left the cabin, heading for Koopa Castle again. Back in Koopa Castle again, Morton finally wakes up.

Susan: Kinda' sleepy there, huh?

Morton: I get like that when I'm not talking. I really don't understand why, but I'm entirely used to it because... I'm talking too much again, I'll shut up.

Susan: How many times do I have to tell you, Morton, I don't care if you-

Morton:  What?!  Flying Bloobers!

Susan: Get away, you, you things!

Susan attacked them with a chair.

Morton: Ack! They've got me! It's all over for me! I'm going to die, I'm going to die, that's the end of my life, it's curtains for me, I'm doomed, I'm a goner, the flame of my existance is about to go out, the pencil of life is about to become too dull to use, the-

Susan: Just what is going on here? And what keeps happening to everyone? Don't worry Morton, I'll save you! (to herself) I don't know what I'd do if you died.

Back on the doomship, the one with Mr. Little...

Luigi: Let us go!

Mr. Little: Oh, I do intend to let you go, believe me.

Luigi: Yea!  I knew we'd win.

Mr. Little: No, you won't win. I'm letting you go into a lava pit! All of you! All I need to do is fly us there first. It'll take a little while, but don't worry, we'll be there before you know it.

Back at the castle, Susan just walked outside and saw the doomship, the one with Mr. Little.

Susan: I've got to get onboard, somehow. Wait- I can use Power Ups, can't I? Just my cousins can't, right? Maybe if I can find a useful Power Up somewhere...

Susan started bashing blocks until she found something useful.

Susan: A leaf?! Bah. I'll just steal a P-wing from that white Mushroom house... I know just where it is!

Susan stole the P-wing and immediately used it. She then flew up into the doomship cabin.

Susan: Stop!

Mr. Little: Oh, do we have an intruder now? Oh, it's that pesky cousin Susan that no one likes. I wasn't counting on a relative being with them at the time. No matter- BLOOBERS ATTACK!

The Bloobers all came towards Susan, but since she was not in the water, she batted them off with her raccoon tail.

Mr. Little: Bloobers, get her already! Bloobers, stop lying around on the floor and get her already, and stop pretending to be injured!

Susan: Let's see who this guy really is!

Susan turned around the chair to reveal...

Mario: A GHOST!

Mario fainted.

Susan: That's no ghost! That's-

Mr. Little: DON'T you dare laugh at me! I may just be a Goomba, but-

Bowser: You're no ancient spirit! You're one of those freakish gray Goombas! I thought I got rid of you all back in '85!

Mr. Little: You never appreciated me! You left me out to rot! You decided to only use your famous orange Goombas from then on! Your gray Goomba here didn't matter! But you will be sorry now! For you see, we are now over the lava pit-

Susan: Oh no you don't!

Susan kicks the Goomba, but is electrocuted before she strikes.

Mr. Little: My, how you have underestimated me. You think I'm that STUPID to let myself be unprotected when a simple touch could turn me to mush?

Susan: Wendy! You've got to help me out here!

Wendy: You? NEVER!

Susan: If you want to live, you'll help me out! You too Lemmy!

Lemmy: Do I have to?

Bowser: YES!

Lemmy: Ok, ok, what do I have to do?

Susan: Lemmy, give me your Freeze Gun. Wendy, give me your makeup kit.

Wendy: MY makeup kit? You want to use MY personal makeup kit?

Susan: YES!

Wendy: Ok, all right already (mumbles words under her breath innappropriate to type here).

Mr. Little: Forget it! Your efforts are too late, Susan. They are to die in 30 seconds! Whoohoohaahaa!

Wendy: Your laugh is stranger than Ludwig's!

Ludwig: Hey! I resent that! As well as the fact that this is the only stupid line the author gave me in this whole story!

Susan ran to the window in Mr. Little's cabin and used Lemmy's Freeze Gun to freeze the lava below. Then she got out the powder in Wendy's makeup kit, increased its size, and threw it down.

Mr. Little: And off you go now!

The floor dropped, and they all landed on the powder atop the ice.

Mr. Little: Why did I not hear a splash when they fell into the lava?

(Mr. Little looked out his cabin window.

Mr. Little: CURSES! That Susan is crafty... I shall get my revenge though. YOU HEAR ME SUSAN?! I SHALL GET MY REVENGE! WHOOHOOHAAHAA!

Mr. Little flew away in his doomship. Everyone went home, except Susan, who went back to Koopa Castle.

Bowser: LARRY! In the dungeon, NOW!

Larry: But what did I do?!

Bowser: I just felt like sending you to the dungeon! NOW!

Larry went to the dungeon.

Bowser: As for you, Susan, you have saved us all. Thank you for that, and GET OUT OF MY CASTLE!

Susan: Get out? Why?

Bowser: Didn't you hear?! That stupid Goomba wants revenge on you! I don't want you around when he does!

Susan: *sigh* Ok. Goodbye Morton (she smiles at him).

Morton: Yeah, yeah, goodbye Susan.

Susan left the castle.

Wendy: Morton, that was a really short goodbye for you.

Morton: Well-

Wendy: I'm just glad she finally left! I hate her I hate her I hate her! You know she ruined my makeup kit? MY makeup kit?

Lemmy: And thanks to her, I need to make another Freeze Gun. I can just kill her! Ugh!

Wendy: Don't worry Lemmy, that crazy Goomba will kill her, and then all our worries will be over.

That night, everyone went to bed.  Morton, however, couldn't sleep, because he was worried about Mr. Little's revenge on Susan.  He knew it would happen, and he knew he would to need to stop it.

The End

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