Mario had woken up bright and early. He goes outside to find Parakarry at his door with a letter. Mario takes the letter and gives Parakarry two coins.
Parakarry: Thanks, Mario.
Mario: Don’t-a mention it.
Mario opens letter and reads silently to himself. The letter reads:
I’ve baked you a cake.
Princess Toadstool, Peach
Mario: Yummy, cake!
Mario throws the letter away, and off he goes. But he doesn't know that he is going to get a little surprise from Bowser…
Axem Leader: … I bet you can’t.
Lil Cheep Cheep: I bet I can.
Axem Leader: I bet you can’t.
Lil Cheep Cheep: I bet I can.
Axem Leader: Prove it!
Lil Cheep Cheep: Fine!
Lil Cheep Cheep is holding a hamburger from Archie’s.
Axem Leader: LCC, LCC, LCC!
Lil Cheep Cheep: Don’t call me that, it sounds too much like “El Sissy”.
Axem Leader: Fine, just don’t call me AL.
Lil Cheep Cheep: Fine…
Axem Leader: See? I told you couldn’t eat an Archie’s burger, those things are so gross.
Lil Cheep Cheep: Gah… Sigh, you’re right.
Lil Cheep Cheep
tosses the hamburger out the window and it hits Mario on the head. He is
knocked out and
rolls down a steep hill.
Axem Leader: Well we know THAT’S not good…
Lil Cheep Cheep rushes out the door and Axem Leader walks out after him. They both watch as Mario rolls to his doom toward the Blooper-infested waters.
Axem Leader: C’mon, we have to save him!
Axem Leader summons Blade from nowhere and they jump on. Mario slowly regains consciousness and realizes what’s going on. He foolishly tries to jump up but gets hit by the speeding Blade.
Mario is sent
sprawling toward the water. A Blooper’s tentacle is seen in the water and
Lil Cheep Cheep
Lil Cheep Cheep
(under his breath): That Blooper will kill him instantly if he gains hold
of him… Gotta do
Lil Cheep Cheep franticly searches for something. He rushes toward a sign that says “BREAK GLASS IN CASE OF EMERGENCY”. He breaks it and pulls out a glass breaker and breaks the glass case next to it to pull out a box. He opens the box to find many different power-ups.
Lil Cheep Cheep: Where is it, where is it…
Axem Leader tries
guiding Blade so Mario will land on top of it, but the only thing he accomplishes
Mario once more. Mario hits the water with a deafening splash.
Lil Cheep Cheep: Got it!
Lil Cheep Cheep: Pulls out the Frog Suit. The giant Blooper grabs ahold of Mario and begins to squeeze the life out of him. He holds Mario a few feet above the water, suffocating him. Lil Cheep Cheep tosses the Frog Suit at Mario and he turns into Frog Mario! His amphibian-like skin makes the Blooper lose his grip on him, and he shoots upward and dives into the water. Mario swims for his life. Axem Leader directs the Axem Rangers off Blade. One-by-one, they each jump down onto the agitated Blooper.
Axem Leader: Attack!
The Axem Rangers fiercely chop up the the Blooper into many pieces. They jump back onto Blade with ease and celebrate. But Mario is still in danger. As he swims, he doesn’t notice that Big Bertha is swimming right behind him, inching closer and closer…
Axem Leader: Mario, watch out!
Lil Cheep Cheep
dives in and swims after them both. He yells in some strange language that
understands, but seems to get Big Bertha’s attention. She stops and turns around.
Lil Cheep Cheep: Cheep cheep, chop choop choop chee chee chop cheep!
Big Bertha: Chip chop?
Lil Cheep Cheep: Chop cheep cheep chop chop!
Big Bertha: Cheep!
Axem Leader: What is he doing?
Axem Black: Sounds like a Pokemon imitation.
Axem Leader: Ah! Evil! Don’t say that!
nearer and nearer to shore, notices something in the corner of his eye.
He turns he head
slightly to see a jet-black liquid billowing out of a bunch of Micro Bloopers. The clear blue waters quickly
turn blacker than night, and Mario feels tiny tentacles wrapping around his limbs.
Axem Leader: Oh no! Where is he now? Red! Scouting report!
Axem Red: He’s right there!
Axem Red points
to where bubbles keep piercing the surface of the water. Lil Cheep Cheep
says a few more
things to Big Bertha, then calls up to Axem Leader.
Lil Cheep Cheep: Throw me a ladder!
Axem Green tosses down a rope ladder, and Lil Cheep Cheep climbs it quickly.
Axem Leader: You’re ok! What happened?
Lil Cheep Cheep: No time to explain… Hurry! Fuse with me to save Mario!
Axem Leader: Alright… Yellow! Grab the stepping stool!
Axem Yellow runs into the cabin and comes out with a stepping stool. Mario struggles to get free but ends up losing his Frog power. Lil Cheep Cheep jumps onto the stepping stool and Axem Leader kneels down next to him. They fuse to create…
(Little annoying theme music)
Axeep Axeep! He
looks like Axem Leader, except he has goggles and he has a white fin sticking
out of his
head instead of a spike. His axe is red and white, like Axem Red’s, except it has two green eyes. He has the on-land fighting technique, while at the same time has perfect swimming abilities and lightning fast reflexes.
Lil Axe (Lil Cheep Cheep): Why do I always have to be the axe?
Axeep Axeep (Axem Leader): Because, you’re you.
Lil Axe: Argh…
Axeep Axeep does
a perfect jack-knife dive into the water. Baby Cheep Cheeps come up from
holding up signs. “10”, “10”, and “I’m hungry”. Axeep Axeep throws Lil Axe like an under-water boomerang, and he glides through the water like a hot knife through butter. With perfect aim, he cuts off the tentacles of the tiny Bloopers and comes back directly to Axeep Axeep’s hand.
Axeep Axeep: Bingo!
Big Bertha swims by and eats Mario in one bite.
Axeep Axeep: @#$%.
Lil Axe wasn’t paying attention though, as he saw another giant Blooper swimming toward them.
Lil Axe: Oh crud, it looks like the mom, and she doesn’t look too happy!
Axeep Axeep looks,
but is too late. The Blooper gets its tentacle around them both. Axeep
Axeep throws Lil
Axe just in time before the tentacle wraps around Axeep Axeep fully.
Lil Axe: Yarg!
Lil Axe acts like
an under-water boomerang again and glides toward the Blooper, cutting off
one of its
tentacles. It makes a loud screeching sound, and Lil Axe keeps gliding. With no one to catch it, it keeps
orbiting the Blooper until the only tentacle it has left is the one holding Axeep Axeep. He swims upward,
catching Lil Axe on the way. With no more tentacles, the helpless Blooper sinks all the way to the bottom.
Axeep Axeep reaches the surface and calls for a ladder. Another rope ladder is thrown down and they both climb it back up onto Blade. Axeep Axeep turns back into Lil Cheep Cheep and Axem Leader.
Axem Leader: Yes, we did it! But we lost Mario…
Lil Cheep Cheep: Not necessarily…
Lil Cheep Cheep points to shore and Big Bertha spits Mario onto land.
Lil Cheep Cheep: Thanks Mom!
Big Bertha smiles and waves, and goes back into the water.
Axem Leader: She’s your Mom?!
Lil Cheep Cheep: You didn’t know? I thought you knew that.
Axem Leader: No, I didn’t… -_-;;
Axem Leader drives
Blade over to where Mario is. He jumps off, followed by Lil Cheep Cheep.
and Lil Cheep Cheep wave to the Axem Rangers as Axem Red drives Blade off into the horizon. Lil Cheep Cheep and Axem Leader go over to Mario, who is lying motionless on the sand.
Lil Cheep Cheep: Are you ok?
Mario: No-a, I’m afraid-a not…
Axem Leader: Anything we can do to help?
Mario: Can-a you-a go to-a Princess-a Peach’s-a Castle and-a bring me-a my cake? Tell her I-a couldn’t-a make it. I’ll be-a waiting here when-a you-a return.
Lil Cheep Cheep: One cake, coming up!
Axem Leader and Lil Cheep Cheep start walking toward Peach’s Castle.
Axem Leader: I hope Mario will be ok if we leave him there…
Lil Cheep Cheep: He’ll be alright, as long as those man-eating crabs I saw earlier don’t bother him.
Axem Leader: -_-;;
Lil Cheep Cheep and Axem Leader make it to Peach’s Castle via warp pipe.
Lil Cheep Cheep: Ciao!
Axem Leader: Why did you say that?
Lil Cheep Cheep: I dunno, I just had a sudden urge to say that.
They walk up to
the castle, when they hear a strange buzzing sound. A Lakitu carrying a
camera zooms down
Axem Leader: Ah! Death from above!
Axem Leader swats at the Lakitu with his axe.
Lil Cheep Cheep: Calm down, it’s not going to hurt us-
The Lakitu starts beating Lil Cheep Cheep senseless with its camera.
Axem Leader: Uh…
Lil Cheep Cheep: ARGH!!!
Lil Cheep Cheep eats the Lakitu, then goes over and knocks on the castle door. The door slowly opens…
Axem Leader: I guess we go in…
As soon as they go in, they hear Bowser’s evil laugh.
Lil Cheep Cheep: This can’t be good…
Axem Leader points to what looks like the ghost of Toad.
Lil Cheep Cheep: Whoa, weird.
Axem Leader walks over to him and he turns solid.
Axem Leader: Cool!
Axem Leader keeps walking away, then getting close, walking away, then getting close.
Toad: Cut it out!
Lil Cheep Cheep: What’s goin’ on here?
Toad: I refuse to tell!
15 minutes of torture later…
Toad: OK OK!!! FIND THE STARS!!! FIND THE STARS!!!
Axem Leader: Okey doke!
Lil Cheep Cheep: Where do we look first?
Toad: Try Bob-omb BattleField, you don’t need any Stars to go there…
Axem Leader: Ok then, onward to Bob-omb Battlefield!
Axem Leader and
Lil Cheep Cheep walk into the Bob-omb Battlefield door and see a painting
Axem Leader: Cool, I wonder how much this costs?
Axem Leader touches it and his hand goes through the painting.
Axem Leader: AHHHH!!! It's disintegrating my hand!
Lil Cheep Cheep pushes Axem Leader the rest of the way into the painting, then hops in after him.
Axem Leader: Whoa! We went right into the painting!
Lil Cheep Cheep: Cool!
They appear to be in Bob-omb Battlefield. Axem Leader gets hit with a water bomb and falls down.
Axem Leader: X_x
Lil Cheep Cheep: Gah! Are you alright?
A red Bob-omb walks up to Lil Cheep Cheep. He takes no chances and gets ready to fight.
Red Bob-Omb: Don’t
worry, we red Bob-Ombs are peace-loving creatures. The black Bob-ombs love
and are destroying our land because of it! Will you please help us?
Lil Cheep Cheep: Sure, but can you help out my friend here?
Lil Cheep Cheep points to his friend on the floor.
Red Bob-Omb: Uh, ok.
The red Bob-Omb lures a black Bob-omb near them and it blows up, then the red Bob-omb gives the coins to Axem Leader.
Red Bob-Omb: Did that help?
Lil Cheep Cheep: We aren't Mario ya know!
But it seems to work; Axem Leader gets up and brushes the dirt off himself.
Axem Leader: Hmm…
Lil Cheep Cheep: So, how can we help in any way?
Red Bob-Omb: Well,
see that big black Bob-omb with the crown way up there on the mountain?
Well he’s the
Bob-omb King, and if you beat him, maybe peace will return to our lands.
Lil Cheep Cheep: We’ll do our best, c’mon Axem Leader!
Axem Leader: Okey doke!
Axem Leader And Lil Cheep Cheep run up the bridge and stop in front of the Chain Chomp.
Axem Leader: Aww, he's so cute, come here b-
The Chain Chomp bites Axem Leader and rips him to pieces like a rag doll.
Lil Cheep Cheep: You idiot, c'mon, we have to get to the top of the mountain!
Axem Leader: Ow...
They go onto the Teeter-Tot Bridge, and Axem Leader has a confused look on his face.
Axem Leader: Do you feel something?
Lil Cheep Cheep: Yeah.
Lil Cheep Cheep
jumps back onto solid ground and Axem Leader falls down to get run over
by a huge black
boulder, exploded on by two Bob-ombs, attacked by a Goomba, and ripped to pieces again by the Chain Chomp.
Axem Leader: Why are all the bad things happening to me?
Lil Cheep Cheep: I dunno.
Axem Leader walks
onto Teeter-Tot Bridge and falls again. Axem Leader falls down to get run
over by a
huge black boulder, exploded on by two Bob-ombs, attacked by a Goomba, and ripped to pieces again by the Chain Chomp.
Axem Leader: o_o;;
Lil Cheep Cheep: Will ya stop fooling around?
Axem Leader: Fine...
Axem Leader does
a long jump to the other side of the bridge and starts running toward the
spiral part of
Lil Cheep Cheep: Hey, wait up!
Lil Cheep Cheep
flops across Teeter-Tot Bridge with ease and catches up with Axem Leader,
run-over twice by boulders.
Axem Leader: I'm starting to hate this...
Lil Cheep Cheep: That's nice.
Lil Cheep Cheep goes further up the mountain.
Axem Leader: I’m starting to get the feeling Lil Cheep Cheep doesn’t care for my health anymore…
Axem Leader jogs to catch up.
Lil Cheep Cheep: Hey!
Axem Leader: What?
Lil Cheep Cheep: I suggest you watch out for-
Axem Leader gets run-over by another boulder.
Lil Cheep Cheep: -that boulder.
Axem Leader: Thanks…
They trek up the mountain some more and finally reach the Bob-omb King.
Lil Cheep Cheep: I say we sneak up on him and beat the bloody heck out of him.
Axem Leader: Ditto.
Lil Cheep Cheep: 1… 2…-
Bob-omb King: Who dares set foot upon my mountain top?
Lil Cheep Cheep: -3!
Bob-omb King: Three? I know no Three… Wah!
The Bob-omb King swats Axem Leader out of the air as he jumps at him.
Axem Leader: Blarg!
Bob-omb King: How dare you attack The King Of All Bob-ombs in such a despicable manner?
Lil Cheep Cheep: Did he really have to capitalize most of that?
Axem Leader: We challenge you, Bob-omb King!
Bob-omb King: I accept!
Axem Leader throws the King off the mountain top. He immediately jumps back up to where he was
You disgrace the Royal Family. It is against the royal rules to throw the
opponent out of
Axem Leader: Ok, fine...
The Bob-omb King picks up Axem Leader and throws him off. He lands right in front of the Chain Chomp.
Lil Cheep Cheep: What was he saying about the royal rules?
Axem Leader: Good vicious- AHHH- *CHOMP*
Chain Chomp: Gulp. Mmm…
Lil Cheep Cheep: That is NOT good…
Lil Cheep Cheep
dodges all of the King’s attacks and grabs. Lil Cheep Cheep gets a firm
grip on the King’s
back-side, but can’t seem to pick him up.
Lil Cheep Cheep: Too… heavy…
The Bob-omb King sits on him and turns him into a pancake. He blows him off the mountain top like a sheet of paper. They both appear in front of the painting. Axem Leader has X's where his eyes should be and Lil Cheep Cheep is as flat as a piece of paper.
Axem Leader: X_X
Lil Cheep Cheep: Blarp…
Axem Leader shakes it off and blows Lil Cheep Cheep up like a balloon.
Lil Cheep Cheep: What happened? 0.o;;
Axem Leader: I think we died… But I don’t think we can die in different worlds, only the real one.
Lil Cheep Cheep: Alright, time to finish what we started…
They jump back into the painting and find themselves back in Bob-omb Battlefield.
Lil Cheep Cheep: We can’t beat the Bob-omb King by ourselves; maybe we should fuse again.
Axem Leader: But we don’t have a stepping stool for you.
Lil Cheep Cheep: What about that thing?
Lil Cheep Cheep points to that one box that you can carry around. Lil Cheep Cheep gets the box and stands on it next to Axem Leader, who kneels down, and they again fuse.
Lil Axe (Lil Cheep Cheep): Ya know, if you didn't have me you would be a nothing.
Axeep Axeep (Axem Leader) smacks Lil Axe.
Axeep Axeep: Shut up.
Axeep Axeep’s hand gets cut off.
Lil Axe: You did it to yourself…
Axeep Axeep: ARGH!!!
They make it back onto the mountain top again. Axeep Axeep has a bandage around his wrist.
Axeep Axeep: We’re back, now you’re gonna get it.
Bob-omb King: I think not, it’s you who’s gonna get it.
Five Bullies fall from the sky and onto the mountain top.
Bob-omb King: Gwahahaha! Prepare to suffer!
Axeep Axeep notices he’s in the middle of everyone.
Lil Axe: Ack!
They all charge toward him. Axeep Axeep does a double-jump and the six bad guys run into each other.
Bob-omb King: Yarg!
Axeep Axeep focuses the power into Lil Axe and brings it down on all six enemies. Bob-omb King is undamaged, and all five Bullies just slightly get pushed back. They all try to run into Axeep Axeep again but Axeep Axeep slices one of the Bullies with Lil Axe and it gets stuck.
Lil Axe: Ahh! Get this thing off me!
Axeep Axeep smacks another Bully off the platform with the Bully-on-a-stick and the Bully that was on the axe flies off and hits another Bully which falls off the mountain. Two Bullies remain, and the Bob-omb King.
Axeep Axeep: Give up, we’re going to defeat you!
Bob-omb King: I think not!
Axeep Axeep throws Lil Axe at The King, but he catches him and tosses him off the mountain.
Lil Axe: Yarp! *clunk*
Bob-omb King: You are nothing without your little friend!
Axeep Axeep: …
The two Bullies attack Axeep Axeep, but right before they hit him he jumps and grabs their heads and smashes them together. They both go sprawling off the mountain.
Axeep Axeep: But I still have the reflexes of a fish. And the strength of an Axem!
Bob-omb King: Ha ha ha! You are weak, I will defeat you now!
Axeep Axeep runs behind the Bob-omb King and picks him up and throws him.
Bob-omb King: Owie...
Axeep Axeep picks him up again and throws him towards the middle.
Axeep Axeep: Have you noticed I'm winning?
Bob-omb King: Not for long!
Bob-omb King produces the Power Star and throws it at the Chain Chomp, who then eats it.
Bob-omb King: Gwahahahaha! Even if you do beat me, you will never get the Power Star!
Axeep Axeep: ARRRGGGGGGHHHHHH!!!
Axeep Axeep grabs the Bob-omb King and throws him into the horizon. Axeep Axeep jumps down to get Lil Axe. They defuse and turn back to normal.
Axem Leader: The Chain Chomp ate the Power Star!
Lil Cheep Cheep: What?! No!
Axem Leader: Wait, remember what I said? You can’t die in these worlds.
Lil Cheep Cheep: Yeah, so?
Axem Leader grins evilly.
Lil Cheep Cheep: Argh! No, don’t!
Axem Leader: Don’t worry, you won't feel excruciating pain…
Axem Leader: For more then ten seconds.
Lil Cheep Cheep: O_O;;
Axem Leader is holding Lil Cheep Cheep inches away from the Chain Chomp’s reach.
Axem Leader: Remember,
you can’t die so get the Star and then get digested and stuff and we will
outside of the picture.
Lil Cheep Cheep: Why do I have to be the one to be eaten?
Axem Leader: Because you’re you.
Lil Cheep Cheep: Argh…
Axem Leader chucks Lil Cheep Cheep at the Chain Chomp, who eats him in one gulp.
Chain Chomp: Ew. Fish…
Axem Leader: O_o
The Star theme goes on.
Axem Leader: Here we go!
Axem Leader: Why the heck did I just say that?!
Axem Leader disappears and appears outside of the picture; next to him is Lil Cheep Cheep.
Axem Leader: Did you get it?
Lil Cheep Cheep grins and holds up a Power Star with a bit of saliva dripping on it.
Axem Leader: Ew, that’s gross!
Lil Cheep Cheep starts chasing Axem Leader around the room to wipe the saliva on him.
Star 2, Foot-Race with Koopa the Quick
Axem Leader: Argh! Get that thing away from me!
Lil Cheep Cheep: I need to clean this Star on something…
Axem Leader: Not me!
Lil Cheep Cheep: Fine, let’s find the next Star.
Axem Leader: All right, let’s go in.
They jump into the painting, and in the distance they can see a large green-shelled Koopa.
Axem Leader: Who’s that guy?
Lil Cheep Cheep: I dunno, you go talk to him. I’ll go talk to the red Bob-omb.
Axem Leader: What if he hurts me?
Lil Cheep Cheep: Don’t be a chicken, he seems friendly enough.
Axem Leader: Alright, whatever you say…
Axem Leader walks up to Koopa the Quick.
KTQ (Koopa the Quick): Hello, would you like to race?
Axem Leader: Sure but-
Koopa the Quick speeds off.
Axem Leader: Ack! Where am I supposed to go?!
Axem Leader looks around, then notices the flag with the Koopa shell on the mountain top.
Axem Leader: Ahh!
Axem Leader runs after KTQ.
Red Bob-omb: Thank you for defeating the Bob-omb King… But his minions still destroy our world… But we will stand strong!
Lil Cheep Cheep: Uh yeah. So do we get any reward?
Red Bob-omb: An award? Oh! My friends in other worlds will open up cannons for you to use.
Lil Cheep Cheep: Cannons?
Red Bob-omb: Yes, observe…
The cannon next to them sinks into the floor.
Red Bob-omb: Jump in!
Lil Cheep Cheep: Uh… Alright…
He jumps in… Meanwhile, KTQ is way ahead of Axem Leader. A strange explosion sound is heard. KTQ looks to see what it was and sees a white-red thing fly at him. Before he can make out what it is, he’s hit by it and he rolls down the mountain.
Axem Leader: Yes! I’m gonna-
Axem Leader notices KTQ is about to run over him.
Axem Leader: AHH!!! Run!
Axem Leader runs
in the opposite direction. He jumps off the side of the mountain and lands
Axem Leader: Agh! Not again!
Axem Leader: X_X
Lil Cheep Cheep gets up, dazed.
KTQ: Argh! Get out of my way!
Koopa the Quick smacks Lil Cheep Cheep to the side and he falls off the mountain side.
Lil Cheep Cheep: Aaaaarrrgggggghhhh… *thump*
KTQ: I’m gonna-
There is another explosion sound.
KTQ: What the?
Lil Cheep Cheep had fallen into another cannon hole and blasted off.
Koopa The Quick gets hit and falls down the mountain. Axem Leader had just jumped back into the picture and is running back up the mountain. He notices Koopa the Quick fall.
Axem Leader: Yes, I’m gonna win!
Axem Leader jumps
at the flag. Right before he touches it, a Bob-omb walks out of nowhere
and blows up,
sending Axem Leader sprawling off the mountain like nothing.
Axem Leader: I hate this… *thump*
Axem Leader gets
up quickly and runs back up the mountain. Koopa the Quick had just got
back up at the
same time and is trailing not too far behind. Axem Leader jumps up to skip some running and touches the flagpole. Axem Leader wins!
Axem Leader: Yes!
Koopa the Quick, panting, catches up and stands next to Axem Leader.
KTQ: Pant… Pant… You are like a human- er… roboticblur… You deserve this Power Star.
KTQ had taken
out the Star and holds it out, but an explosion is heard and Lil Cheep
Cheep hits KTQ, which
sends the Star flying off the mountain and toward some wooden pillars.
Axem Leader: ARGH!!! NO!!!
Axem Leader had
jumped off the mountain after it. He hits the floor with a thud, and the
Power Star is just
inches from his reach.
Lil Cheep Cheep: Blarg! Annoying suspence scene!
Axem Leader: C’mon... almost... got it...
So close... too many elipses...
Axem Leader: GOT IT!!!
Axem Leader and Lil Cheep Cheep: Here we go!
They disappear and end up in front of the picture.
Lil Cheep Cheep: Yes! We got another one!