Koopas Alone I

By Lemmy Koopa

The Koopa Kids were working on a new invention. On their last outing with Bowser, they had failed, and Bowser had said he would never let them help him again. The Koopalings hoped that their new invention would get them back in Bowser’s favor.

"I hope that Bowser…" said Lemmy.

"…likes our invention," finished Iggy.

"It’s my invention," said Ludwig as he twisted a wrench.

"I gave the inspiration with all my talking and I am smart too but no one likes me and I am depressed because of that and ‘cause it is cold…" said Morton.

"My strength was used to tighten all the bolts," said Roy.

"It doesn’t matter!" shouted Wendy.

"Yes, he need to…" said Lemmy.

"…Finish our invention," finished Iggy.

Ludwig stood up. "It’s done!" he laughed.

"Scary!" Larry grinned.

"Resembles my work," approved Roy.

"Our invention is so good…" started Lemmy.

"…That it can not fail!" finished Iggy.

The Koopa Kids rolled their invention out of their laboratory and into Bowser’s throne room. Bowser was breathing fire at a picture of Mario.

"King Dad, look…" started Lemmy.

"…At our invention!" finished Iggy.

"My invention!" shouted Ludwig. Roy kicked him and he shut up.

"It’s you!" hissed Larry.

"Yes," said Wendy. "Now you can rest while you defeat Mario. Wait, that didn’t come out right."

"Our invention is even stronger than me!" said Roy.

"We rule and we did it for you because we like you and we want to help you and do you like it and I hope so ‘cause your great and Koopatacular and…"

"Can’t you see my ingenious?" grinned Ludwig.

"So, what do you think?" asked the seven Koopalings.

"You fools!" roared Bowser. "I don’t need a robot of myself! What do you think I am, incompetant? Get out of my castle! Out! And take your scrap pile with you!"

All seven Koopa Kids stared with open mouths.

"I don’t believe this!" said Ludwig, feeling stupid.

Roy fainted weakly.

Morton couldn’t think of anything to say.

Wendy turned and left.

Larry tried to sneak away but tripped on the rug.

Lemmy and Iggy started to fight. "Why would I talk to you?" demanded Lemmy.

The Koopalings left the castle. They went to the nearby fortress. It was barren and cold, and all the Koopalings shivered except the cold loving Lemmy. Morton froze.

The Koopa Kids decided that if they were going to survive, they were going to have to keep watch. Lemmy took the first watch. As he watched, he saw Bowser leave the castle in his clown copter. Iggy, who had the next shift, saw Bowser return with Princess Toadstool. Ludwig saw Mario walk into the castle. Larry heard a loud commotion inside the castle. Wendy saw a large sword split the sky and fall into the castle. No Koopa Kid seemed concerned.

Lemmy was out on his second watch. Suddenly, he saw a group of seven Goombas walking down the road. Lemmy rolled into the fortress and warned his siblings. The Koopa Kids set up traps for their unwelcome visitors.

The first Goomba walked up to the front door. He turned the knob and fell victim to Roy’s trap as a boxing glove popped out of the door and creamed the Goomba.

The second Goomba went in through the basement. He fell victim to Lemmy’s trap as he slipped on some ice and fell into a corner. Cement balls fell down a flight of stairs and squished the Goomba.

The third Goomba snuck in after the third Goomba. He did not expect to fall victim to Ludwig’s trap. A broken rope caused chocolate syrup to be blown onto the Goomba. Giant bugs flew in through an open window and ate the Goomba.

The fourth Goomba flew in the same window. He walked up some stairs and then fell victim to Wendy’s trap. The Goomba was in a dark hallway and pulled a light switch. Nail polish fell through a hole and covered the Goomba. Embarrassed, the Goomba ran away.

The fifth Goomba drilled a hole in the roof. He did not expect to fall into Iggy’s trap. A staple gun shot the Goomba in the eyes and blinded him. The Goomba didn’t have any glasses, and was forced to sit down.

The sixth Goomba barged through the front door. He did not expect to fall victim to Larry’s trap. The Goomba looked through a peephole. Larry ran around from behind and shoved him through the hole.

The seventh Koopaling broke through a window. He did not expect to fall victim to Morton’s trap. The Goomba touched the frozen Morton and froze instantly.

The Koopalings cheered. Then they noticed a note the first Goomba dropped. The note indicated that the Goombas were making a strong potion to sell to Bowser. The Koopa Kids collected the seven items from the seven Goombas, put them in a pot, and created the potion themselves. The note said that whoever the potion was dumped on would lose half of his strength. The Koopa Kids took a vote and the unanimous decision was to help Bowser by pouring it on the castle stormer Smithy.

Lemmy approached Smithy by impersonating the neutral Grate Guy. He dumped the potion on Smithy fled. Smithy’s power was cut in half. When Mario, Bowser, Geno, Mallow, and Princess Toadstool finally met up with him, they had no idea Smithy was any weaker. But the fact is, if Smithy had had his regular amount of attacking power, he would not have been defeated. Therefore, the Koopa Kids were the real heroes in Super Mario RPG.

The Koopa Kids spent the rest of the war on a tropical island. They earned a free stay by threatening the life of the manager. After a while, they went back to the castle to see if their father had defeated Smithy yet. They caught him shaking hands with Mario while he started to make repairs. Larry laughed and took a picture.

After Mario left, the Koopa Kids jumped down from their hiding place and confronted their father.

"Kind Dad, look at…" started Lemmy.

"…our PICTURE!" finished Iggy.

"Give that to me!" roared Bowser.

"Not so fast!" sneered Larry, waving the picture.

"Yeah, he have the power now!" stomped Roy.

"We are geniuses," said Ludwig.

"And pretty too," said Wendy.

"So, how about it?" asked Lemmy and Iggy.

"This is mutiny!" roared Bowser.

"Tough!" shouted the Koopa Kids.

Bowser knew he was beaten. "Fine, give me the picture and you can come back."

"Forever?" asked Ludwig.

"No!" said Bowser.

The Koopa Kids turned to leave.

"Okay, for ever," grumbled Bowser.

"Can we use our invention too?" asked Larry.

"No!" said Bowser.

The Koopa Kids turned to leave.

"Okay, okay!" said Bowser.

The Koopa Kids cheered. They gave Bowser the picture and raced inside to watch television. They promptly picked up their old ways by having an argument.

"Where is Morton?" Wendy eventually asked.

The moral of this story: I have no idea. But it does tell where the Koopa Kids were during Super Mario RPG.

The End

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