Guest256: Hello! For no particular reason at all, I will be hosting a Mario Party game that’s a mix of all three. Say hello to Mario, Luigi, Peach, and Yoshi!
Mario: Where is it? I must find it!
Luigi: Can we have bathroom breaks every turn?
Peach: Oh I love you all! All of you MUST MARRY ME!
Yoshi: Yoshi hungry, but Yoshi know Yoshi get coins if win. Coins buy food.
Guest256: As you can see, we have a delirious plumber, a tall guy who always wets himself, a bigamy-compulsive victim princess, and a dino with at LEAST five more brain cells than the others put together. We now turn to our judges, the Koopa Kids, who will predict the winner.
Ludwig: It is quite obvious to identify Yoshi as the victor.
Lemmy: Yoshi’s got this one in the bag!
Roy: Yoshi will pound ‘em all!
Iggy: I hate to admit it, but only Yoshi can win.
Wendy: Duh… Peach will win! I love you, Peach!
Peach: I love you, too!
Morton: Only Yoshi can win, because he is the only sane, not crazy, down-to-Plit one of this group, and surely he can beat back the others, and he will use all his abilities-
Larry: Come on, we all know Yoshi’s the winner.
Guest256: Yoshi also gets my vote.
Yoshi: Yoshi have lots of support! Yoshi happy!
Guest256: Let’s get to the game! You can only hold two items at a time, so it’s sort of a combination of Mario Party 2 and 3. You will be able to choose who you steal from with the Plunder Chest, just not what item you steal. As a new addition, you can now choose who you warp with when ya hit a Warp Block! Let’s get the game started. The board we shall play on is a new one called Toad’s House. It’s basically Toad’s SMB3 house reformatted to become a playing board. I won’t tell you about the challenges on this board, you have to find them out for yourself. Oh yeah, there are also new mini-games, but they won’t have names. Let’s roll to see who goes first!
Mario gets a 10, Peach gets a 5, Luigi gets a 7, and Yoshi gets an 8.
Guest256: The order is Mario, Yoshi, Luigi, and Peach. Mario, go!
Mario jumps up and hits the block. He gets a 5. He moves 5 spaces and lands on a Red Space.
Mario: Yippee!
Guest256: What a moron. Yoshi, go!
Yoshi hits the block and gets a 7. He moves 7 spaces, and passes Koopa Bank.
Koopa Troopa: Please deposit five coins.
Yoshi: Aawwww…
Yoshi deposits five coins and walks along. He lands on a Blue Space.
Yoshi: Yoshi beating Mario!
Guest256: Luigi, go!
Luigi jumps up and gets a 6. He... err… eww… well, he slips on his own product and only moves 3 spaces, landing on a Blue.
Luigi: I got it!
Guest256: I hate that expression… they never actually specify what they have. Peach, try to do this one without kissing someone!
Peach rolls and gets a 10. She passes Koopa Bank.
Koopa Troopa: Please deposit-
Peach kisses Koopa Troopa.
Koopa Troopa: AAAAAAAAH!
Koopa Troopa runs away, but not before mugging Peach and stealing all her coins. Peach walks on and lands on a Bowser Space.
Bowser: You poor thing, you have no coins! Let me give you ten coins and all will be-
Peach kisses Bowser.
Bowser: I take that back! Get away from me!
Bowser runs away screaming.
Guest256: Well, after the first turn, the standings are:
Luigi: 13 coins
Yoshi: 8 coins
Mario: 7 coins
Peach: 0 coins
Guest256: It’s a 2-on-2 mini-game! The mini-game will be Looney Lumberjacks, from MP2! It starts… now!
Yoshi and Luigi get off to a good start. However, Luigi wets himself and he and Yoshi slip.
Yoshi: Luigi make Yoshi and Luigi lose for sure now!
But on the other side, Mario is too stupid to know how to pull the saw, and Peach is kissing the log.
Guest256: Don’t kiss the log. You might get diseased or something like that. In fact, you could-
Peach: GLAK!
Guest256: Too late, I guess. Since Peach can’t participate any longer, Luigi and Yoshi win!
Mario: That’s-a cheap!
Guest256: You’re too stupid to complain, remember?
Mario: Darn-a straight!
Guest256: After the mini-game, the standings are as follows:
Luigi: 23 coins
Yoshi: 18 coins
Mario: 7 coins
Peach: 0 coins
Guest256: And Luigi is winning after the first round of this 15-round mini-game, but who knows what could happen? I guess we’ll find out next time!
Next time...
Guest256: Due to special request, the game has been increased to 25 turns.
Yoshi: WHAT? Yoshi no like 15 turns as is, Yoshi refuse to play if 25 turns!
Lemmy: Too bad. I wish this pizza could just eat itself, don’t you?
Yoshi: Yoshi go for as many turns as you want!
Guest256: Good. For those of you who have memory problems, here are the standings:
Luigi: 23 coins
Yoshi: 18 coins
Mario: 7 coins
Peach: 0 coins
Guest256: It’s your turn, Mario!
Mario jumps up and gets a 5. He walks past the Koopa Bank.
Koopa Troopa: Please deposit five coins!
Mario: I eat-a my socks!
Koopa Troopa: *shudder*
Mario deposits five coins and walks on. He lands on a Chance Time space.
Luigi: You’re-a gonna steal from-a me, aren’t you? You’re-a mean!
Mario: No, I’m-a Mario!
Mario jumps up and gets the blocks like this: Peach | x10 coins | Mario.
Mario: Yay! Ten coins!
Mario is too stupid to know Peach doesn’t have any coins. He dances around stupidly.
Guest256: Augh… Go, Yoshi!
Yoshi jumps and gets a 6. He passes Boo.
Yoshi: Yoshi want to steal coins from Luigi!
Boo: Fine by me!
Boo steals all of Luigi’s coins.
Luigi: CHEAP!
Guest256: That’s just the way it goes.
Yoshi: Yay, Yoshi have 41 coins now!
Yoshi lands on a Blue Space.
Yoshi: Make that 44!
Guest256: Luigi, go!
Luigi gets a 2. He lands on the Koopa bank.
Koopa Troopa: Congrats! You get all our coins! We have twenty. We hope to do business with you again!
Luigi: Ye-hoo!
Guest256: Peach, go!
Peach gets a 5. She lands on a Red Space, losing nothing.
Peach: Oh, I’m just SO good!
The green spaces change and Luigi gets paired with Peach while Mario gets paired with Yoshi.
Yoshi: Yoshi paired with moron!
Guest256: Too bad. The mini-game here is Magnet Carta from Mario Party 2. It starts… now!
Peach suddenly gets out of her cart, runs towards a chest, and cuddles it.
Guest256: Peach is disqualified for leaving her cart!
Peach, in anger, kicks the chest into Luigi’s goal, giving him three coins.
Luigi: I’m-a gonna win!
Mario is moving his cart all over the place and managing to get some in. Yoshi finally gets used to the controls of the cart and tries to get some coins for his team but is obscured by Mario. Since Mario isn’t really getting anywhere and he’s blocking Yoshi, they end up with a paltry six coins. However, since Luigi was on his own, he only managed to rack up eight coins.
Guest256: Let’s see the standings now!
Yoshi: 50 coins
Luigi: 28 coins
Mario: 13 coins
Peach: 8 coins
Guest256: Well, the order is still the same, except for the fact that Yoshi advanced to first! We’re up to Turn 3 now. Let’s go, Mario!
Mario jumps up and hits the block. He gets a 1. He walks forward and lands on a Battle Mini-Game space.
Goomba: Uh, uh… this will be for ten coins! What? We don’t have enough? I hate this job…
The roulette spins and lands on Rakin’ ‘Em In.
Guest256: Alright! Go!
All of the players get off to a good start. Mario even gets a Golden Mushroom. Luigi, however, falls behind by getting a Poison Mushroom. Mario is far ahead but suddenly starts racking up Poison Mushrooms. Luigi is far behind but suddenly starts getting Golden Mushrooms. Peach and Yoshi keep getting Mushrooms. When the game ends, the standings are:
Mario: 2
Yoshi: 5
Luigi: 8
Peach: 4
Guest256: Luigi wins, and Yoshi comes in second! Let’s see the standings now:
Mario: 14 coins
Yoshi: 62 coins
Luigi: 44 coins
Peach: 1 coin
Guest256: I guess Peach and Mario got one coin each! It’s your turn, Yoshi.
Yoshi gets a 5. He moves and lands on a ? Space.
Yoshi: What happen now?
The three boxes in the middle of the room (remember, this is a board of Toad's Mario 3 house) get mixed up.
Yoshi: That it? Yoshi thought something SIGNIFICANT happen!
Guest256: Luigi, it’s your turn!
Luigi gets a 4 and lands on a Blue Space.
Luigi: I’m-a the best!
Guest256: Peach, make this a good one!
Peach rolls and gets a 10. She passes Boo.
Peach: I wanna steal from Mario! That’s what he gets for ruining our date!
Boo: Right away.
Boo steals all of Mario’s coins.
Guest256: I was expecting that.
Mario: Owowowowowow!
Peach moves on and lands on a Blue Space.
Peach: Yeah! Peachy’s got it!
Guest256: Don’t make me sick.
Yoshi and Mario change to blue.
Guest256: Well, I guess we have a 4-player mini-game! The mini-game will be Bombs Away, from Mario Party 1 and 2. However, it will be like Mario Party 2 in the fact that Bowser has his secret weapon at the end. Go!
At the beginning, Luigi jumps on Peach, stunning her. She tries to get revenge and jumps back but gets hit by a cannonball that knocks her and Luigi off the island. Meanwhile, Mario is dancing stupidly to avoid the cannonballs, while Yoshi is bouncing on his head. Yoshi jumps away to avoid a cannonball that stuns Mario, but when he jumps back Bowser’s weapon hits them both, causing them to fly off the island at seemingly the same time.
Blooper: Actually, narrator, I think the dinosaur got knocked off first.
Guest256: Okay then! Mario wins!
Yoshi: Grr…
Guest256: Here are the standings:
Yoshi: 62 coins
Luigi: 44 coins
Peach: 16 coins
Mario: 10 coins
Guest256: Mario, begin Turn 4!
Mario: How?
Guest256: Just go.
Mario: How?
Guest256: HIT THE BLOCK!
Mario: H-
Guest256 shoots a spike at Mario. He jumps to dodge it and hits the block in doing so.
Guest256: You got a 3, Mario!
Mario moves three spaces and passes Boo.
Mario: I’ll-a steal from Luigi, since he busted my-a favorite record in Oh Brother!
Boo: At your service!
Boo steals half of Luigi’s coins, which is 22 for the mathematically disabled.
Luigi: Twice in one game-a!
Mario: Yippee! Hahaha!
Mario moves on and lands on a Red Space.
Mario: Oh no!
Guest256: Yoshi, it’s your turn!
Yoshi hits the block and gets a 7. He moves and passes Toad.
Toad: Hi! Do you want to buy a Star?
Yoshi: Of course!
Toad gives Yoshi a Star.
Toad: You also get to choose from these!
Toad points to the three boxes that Yoshi mixed up earlier.
Yoshi: Hmm… Yoshi take middle one.
Out pops a Super Leaf.
Guest256: Time to explain this. Before you see what each mini-game is going to be, you can choose to use your Power-Up. It may aid you in winning. However, it will disappear after the mini-game, and you can’t use it for things like Battle mini-games. And you won’t know what the mini-game is, so you might waste it. You can hold up to two Power-Ups at a time, but they do not count as items.
Yoshi: Cool!
Yoshi keeps moving and lands on a Bowser Space.
Bowser: Prepare to die, dino-butt!
The roulette lands on Star Steal.
Bowser: Uh… this has been a nice tête-à-tête, but I have to go now!
Bowser runs away.
Yoshi: Yoshi always escape danger!
Guest256: Luigi, now’s your chance!
Luigi: To do what?
Guest256: I dunno.
Luigi hits the block and gets a 5. He passes Boo.
Boo: From whom would you like to steal?
Luigi: I’m-a mad at Yoshi and-a Mario, but Mario did-a break my favorite wrench. Steal from-a him.
Boo: Right away, sir!
Boo steals back all the coins from Mario that Mario stole from Luigi.
Luigi: That’s-a sweet revenge!
Luigi lands on a Blue Space.
Guest256: Peach, make this quick and painless!
Peach gets a 7. She passes Koopa Bank.
Peach: Oh, you again? I thought we went over this, honey bunch.
Koopa Troopa: Just deposit five coins.
Peach does so and continues on to a Red Space.
Peach: Oh NO!!!
Guest256: Shut up. Yoshi, will you use your Power-Up?
Yoshi: Yoshi take gamble. Yoshi use it.
Guest256: Very well then!
Yoshi sprouts raccoon ears and his tail transforms into that of a raccoon.
Guest256: And this turn’s mini-game is… Shock, Drop, and Roll, from Mario Party 2! Get started!
Luigi easily knocks off Peach and Mario, but Yoshi stays aloft with his raccoon tail.
Luigi: Hey, that’s-a cheating!
Guest256: Nope. As long as he doesn’t get shocked, he’s still in.
Time eventually runs out.
Guest256: Congratulations on your wise decision, Yoshi! It looks like you three won! Let’s see the standings:
Yoshi: 1 Star, 52 coins
Luigi: 47 coins
Peach: 18 coins
Mario: 17 coins
Guest256: Interesting! Yoshi has bought the first Star of the game, and also got the first Power-Up. We’re out of time, but join us next time when this game gets even more enticing!
To Be Continued...
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