The Babies' First Day of Nursery School

By Lems Big Bro

Little Lemmy's Land Qualifier

Toadsworth was frantic. Babies Mario and Luigi were to be starting nursery school in one hour! Everyone had slept in. Toadsworth ran into the babies' room.

Toadsworth: Now now kids, time to get up- nursery school is today!

Baby Mario: Awwwwwwww, do we av to?

Toadsworth: Yes, yes yes.

Baby Luigi: You no fair- Toads no go to stupid nursery!

Toadsworth: I'm a Toad myself, so I look after them and teach them.

Baby Mario: Teach us den!

Toadsworth: There's different age rates... ANYWAY! Get going, we don't have all day.

The babies reluctantly got out and were ready to go. Meanwhile at Bowser's lair...

Bowser: I'm so proud of you, Junior- your first day of nursery school!

Junior: Stop it, you'll embarrass me!

Bowser: I'm sorry, son!

Junior: Okay, let's go!

Bowser: And remember son, if anyone gives you any cheek, you take care of them!

Junior: Aye aye, Daddy!

Three teachers were at the door, two women and one man. One of the ladies was extremly large, with blonde short hair, shuffled makeup, and an evil glare. Her name was Mrs. Greco. The other lady was fat but not nearly as much as she was tall, and had short grey hair and glasses: Mrs. Albert. The man had a straight back and was tall, with gray hair and a gray smooth moustache; he looked very formal. His name was Mr. Lamont.

Toadsworth: So... um if there's any smashed glass et cetera, we will pay for the damage.

Greco: Whatever- I hate children!!!

Toadworth; Hehe, funny joke. Byebye now. Boys, behave yourself.

In the school building, the babies were playing with bocks and soon got restless. They crawled over to Mr Lamont.

Baby Mario: Is deer anythin' ta eat 'ere?

Lamont: You will be issued a packet of 10-cent crisps and a small carton of milk at approximately 10:30 hours.

Baby Luigi: Issued?

Baby Mario: Apwoximately?

Baby Luigi: 10:30 hours?

Babies: Huh?!

Mrs. Albert rang a bell.

Albert: Snacktime, brats!!!

The babies wanted to get the first packet that was there; it was ready-salted. They ran to get it. Just as the babies grabbed the packet, Juniors did so as well.

Junior: Not you two!

Baby Luigi: Hey you mean Koopa, we had dis first!

Junior: No way, it's mine!

Baby Mario: Dut' up you ugly! Just cus Mario beat up your daddy all da time!

Junior: Yeah... Well my Papa wasn't trying, and if you slag him once more, you'll pay!

Greco: What's going on here?! No fighting!

Junior: These two creeps... I mean, um, bullies are stealing MY crisps! This is the only ready-salted one- me no like prawn cocktail flavor!

Baby Mario: Us either- we had them first!

Junior: In your dreams!

Greco: I'll have them!

Mrs. Greco ate the packet of crisps, and then all the other crisps as well.


She walked away.

Baby Luigi: Man, she fat.

Baby Mario: Me agwees.

Junior: Whatever. I guess that means no crisps then. Grrrr.

He walked away, but continued listening to the Mario Babies.

Baby Mario: Hehehe, lets go into the back and find cwips, haha!

Baby Luigi: Yuuuuuuum! Ready-salted!

The walked towards the back.

Junior: Hahahaha! If I tell Greco, she eats dem' and then... no more babies! Papa's gonna be proud of my first day!

The babies were being sly. Mrs. Albert was guarding the back.

Baby Mario: Ohhhh, dere's gotta be some way. Let's be, um, wots dat word dat Mario used not to discwibe us with? Um, civiwised! Dats it.

Baby Luigi: Okay, let's be "cwivilised".

He got a toy brick and threw it at a painting. Mrs. Albert ran to save the picture whilst the babies crawled through the door.


Junior: It was Baby Mario and Luigi, sir.


Junior: Sory, I mean... um, m'am.

Lamont: It was, was it? Well, they will get their just desserts. Where are they?

Junior: Not that I'm a tattletail, but i believe they went to the back to steal crisps...

Greco: MY CRISPS?!

Junior: Yup yup!

Albert; Well then, kiddies, carry on playing by yourselvess for a while. We three big people are going to have a bit of fun...

Junior: As i said, I didn't want to be a tattletail.

Greco: You are a tattletail! That will get you far in life!

The teachers went to the back. The Mario Babies didn't notice as they were munching on crisps.

Greco: Hello boys!!!

Baby Mario: What? How did you know?!

Greco: How do you think, idiots?

Baby Luigi; Junior, I know it! We'll kill 'im!

Albert: You wont get the chance!

Lamont quickly slammed the door and locked it tight.

Albert: Have a nice life! Hahahahahahahah!

Junior ran up to Lamont.

Jr.: Hehe, did you take care of them?

Lamont: I'm not speaking my personal life to a little runt like yourself.

Jr: Heyyyyy!

Lamont walked away, Greco and ALbert were coming out.

Junior: Sooo, i believe a "thanks Junior" is in order.

Greco:  I don't.

Albert: Why would we thank a runt like you?

Junior: Buh... buh you said I'd get far by telling.

Greco: Come to us in six years, little twerp.

Junior: Forget it, fatty!


Albert: Greco, no! Remember, we're trying to get a promotion in education, for the money.

Greco: I know, but I hate kids!

Lamont: Me too.

Albert: And I, but the money is worth it!

Greco: I guess you're right...

Lamont: Naptime!!! (Rascles...)

Junior: I don't wanna.


While the others were snoozing, the teachers were in the back playing cards. Junior got up.

Junior: I hate to say it, but I gotta drive the teachers out... *gulp* And i need the Babies' help.

He went to the back. Meanwhile, the teachers were scheming...

Lamont: The babies with caps and the Koopa, they're making our jobs more difficult.

Albert: We have to drive them out of this nursery!!!

The Mario Babies were actually feeling threatened for the first time.

Baby Mario: Dere is no way out!

Baby Luigi: Ya think Greco's gonna eat us?

Baby Mario: Honestly I do...

Baby Luigi: So den... is dis it?

Junior (from the other side of the door): Hey guys...

Baby Luigi: Not you!

Baby Mario: You snitch, what ya want?!

Junior: Well, I was thinking we could team up... for this once.

Baby Luigi: Noo!

Junior: I'll set you free.

Baby Mario: We're listening...

Junior: Okay, let's drive these teachers away- far away.

Baby Mario: Fine, but you must follow di' rules.

Junior: Whaaaa?!

Baby M: Rue number one: Me and baby Luigi are da boss! Two: If at da end, we welise dey were aliens or summit, we get da money. And... three: We're called Team Babies!

Junior: Whaaaaaaaaaaa?! Fine, agreed, but you guys better do good. No money involved!

Baby Mario: We don't need money!

Baby Luigi: Toadsworth takes care of that!

Junior set them free.

Mario Babies and Junior: Let's do it!!!

Mr. Lamont was sitting on a chair when the babies approached him.

Baby Mario: Hiya!

Lamont: You! But how? My brain appears not to be telling me why you're here. What happened?!

Baby Luigi: Dust memember who is in charge here.

Lamont: That would be me.

Baby Mario: Nuh uh!

Lamont: Of course i am, as well as the two other dazzling ladies... I mean, um... teachers. *cough*

Baby Luigi: Ohh yeah, well if we tell Toadsworth 'bout what ya did to me and my brother den you be in big trouble!

Lamont: Do you think im going to give in to blackmail?!

Baby M: And we'll tell Greco and Albert what you just said!

Lamont: Okay, okay.

The babies said the exact same thing to Mrs Albert and Greco (but without the ladies part!). Later, they were in the back with Junior.

Junior: Okay, so you've done that, now what?

Baby Mario: We wait 'til the end of the day.

Junior: And...

Baby Luigi: We tell Daddy Toadworth, 'n they get chucked out!


Baby Mario: Yup.

Juniorr: Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr. We can't even hurt 'em? Or do anything fun? And you two will get the credit?

Baby Luigi: Well, remember rule number two!


Suddenly, the three boys realized everyone else was outside. All the doors and windows were boloted down with metal.

Junior: What the...

Then the three teachers appeared.

Baby Luigi: Hey, what's going on?!

Lamont: We don't care about money anymore. After six years in the army, I know never to give in unless you can help it. I can help it, so we're going to kill you!

Greco: And eat you!!!

Baby Mario: And knowing Super Mario, I learned never to give in to bullies!

Junior: Okay... then you all got a plan?

Baby Mario: Suuuuuuuuure do!

Jr: Great! Where do we exit?

Baby Luigi: Nowhere.

Junior: What?!

Baby Mario: This should be fun.

Albert: Maybe it will at that.

Lamont chased Baby Mario, Greco persued Junior, and Albert came after Baby Luigi. Each teacher tried to hit their respective baby with their cane. Baby Mario thought quickly and grabbed a box of pens and crayons, then threw them in Lamont's face.

Lamont: Ahh! The color!!!

Albert was to doubt the fastest of the three teachers. She ran after Baby Luigi with no sign of giving up. Baby Luigi  quickly hid behing the rocking horse, making Albert flip over it- right into Lamont!

Baby Luigi: Hehehehehehehehehehehe! Wooks like Lamont got his dweam after all.

Lamont: *cough* I'm sure I have no idea what you're talking about.

Baby Mario: You said she was dazzling!

Lamont: No I didn't!

Baby Luigi: We all heard ya!

Baby Mario: Somethings not right... Did we forget something?

Baby Luigi: Yeah, I think so. I dont know what though...

Jr: Heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeey!!! Help, guys!!!

Baby Mario: Never thought i'd see the day we help Junior!

Greco had him in a corner. She picked up a bookshelf.

Greco: You're dead!!!

Baby Mario: Ello fatso.

Greco: I'm big-boned!!!

Baby Luigi played the same trick on Greco as he did Albert and she crushed the other two tricked teachers, breaking their bones.

Greco: We'll remember this!!!

Baby Mario: Tell it to tha judge!

The Mario Babies gave each other five. Then they gave Junior five. They were silent after that. Could this day possibly change their future? The metal doors burst open with Bowser's mace-like fists.

Bowser: Junior! You're safe! Im so glad, I heard you had pain-in-the-butt teachers, and then when I heard the Mario Babies were here, I came staright after my sardine sandwich.

Toadsworth came running in.

Toadsworth: My my my, what a mess. I knew that you two couldn't have coped a day in a normal nursery with normal other children! Eeeeek! Bowser!

Bowser: Boo.

Toadsworth: Ahhhhhhhhhhhh!!!

Greco got up. The other two were still dazed from Greco's weight.

Greco: Now I'm mad, you brats are getting it!!!

Bowser: Don't mess with my son!

He then flamethrowed her in the face, followed by a body slam of his own.

Bowser: That'll "teach" you to shut up!

Junior and Mario Babies: Yay!!!

Baby Mario: Now what?

Junior: (thinking quickly) Nice work. NOT! You two totally depended on me!

Baby Luigi: Yeah wight, you arwe a snitch!

Junior: Wanna make something of it?

Baby Mario: We not scared of you!

Junior: You will be.

Bowser: Junior, ignore them. Let's go and plot a few more plans. See you all after we defeat Mario.

Baby Mario: Yeah wight!

Bowser and Junior left. The police soon came and arrested Greco, Albert, and Lamont. The Mario Babies only wondered, though: Is it possible for them to be friends with Junior?

The End

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