By Mario Fan
Chapter One: A Thief in the Night
Dark Land, Kooparian
It was a year since the construction of the new Castle Koopa had begun, and already the towering spires appeared dead and terrible against the crimson-gray backdrop of the sky. Legions of Goombas and other grunt soldiers clambered along the unfinished walls of the royal palace and balanced on criss-crossing arrangements of roped-together planks. Most horrifying of all was the massive stone resemblance of King Bowser himself plunging from the steep mountain range that ringed a protective barrier behind the fortress.
The experienced eye could see beyond the initial amazement of the immense palace, though, and look farther back to the gnarled structure that rose out of one of the many mountain faces. Besides a few crooked windows that blared out a sickly yellow light, the tower seemed to be just another part of the rock, but anyone with half an ounce of fear knew it was the private chambers of the Magikoopas.
“Those insufferable Goombas don’t know the difference between a wrench and a ratchet!” Kammy complained as she kept watch from one of the high balconies. “They’ll never finish our ship before Bowser remembers he’s supposed to be going to Meridian.”
“Our ship?” Kamek asked calmly, stepping into the room. “The new craft you so personably refer to will be mine and mine alone. It was me, after all, who led the counterattack against Iggy’s rebellion… successfully.”
“Oh, don’t get your knickers in a knot!” the witch sneered and hopped to the ground. “You should be more intent on finding the lost underwater city of Bowser’s desires. Surely one of your musty old books mentions it.”
“As if you had no interest,” Kamek said, grinning.
He ignored the touchy subject and placed a dust-covered volume on a table beside him, directing the other Magikoopa’s attention to a certain page near the end. Without any more effort to conceal her excitement, Kammy skipped over and began reading.
“If I’m correct, this was the rumor that made you persuade Bowser of Meridian being a suitable target,” said Kamek.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” she smiled, “but this passage is more than intriguing enough to confirm the wisdom of my advice to the king. Even you must agree with that.”
“Unfortunately,” he said dryly and slammed the book shut. “This volume was transcribed from the journals of a long dead navigational officer. From the time period and origin of the name, I’d say he was probably a member of the joint-armies of the Tropacine Republic before it dissolved.”
“All the better for him to know the secrets of the Nokis.”
“And all the better for you to make unwise assumptions,” Kamek shot back, tucking the book under his cloak. “Even if such a treasure did exist beneath the ocean floor, what possible use would it be to us? We are in the business of empire-building, not creating a museum for your simple amusement.”
“Fool, I’ll have your-” Kammy cut herself short and spun around to face the window.
“Right below us, how convenient,” Kamek said and propelled himself through the air, diving into the open sky.
Kammy rushed over in time to see him plunging recklessly towards the ground and bent over to pen up her purple robe. With a joyous cackle, she leapt from the uneven stone floor and sailed into a dark shadow.
~*~*~*~
“They work us folks like dogs!” a Terrapin said gruffly and wiped a stream of perspiration away from his bald head. After resolving to staying uncomfortable, he put his heavy helmet back on and dug into the mountain with a pick-axe.
“That’s more pathetic than my excuses,” said his Goomba partner, who was wearing a hard hat that made him appear just a bit too adorable for a villain. “I was on Morton’s doomship when it got sunk at Star Hill. Getting out of that mess was some real suffering.”
“Oh, right, and you faced off against Luigi and Mallow, yadda, yadda, yadda,” the Koopa droned on mockingly. “Sheesh! Give me a break. No one else’ll even be your pal since you started telling that whopper. At least you could be considerate enough not to pull that on me.”
“No one yadda yaddas me!” the Goomba squeaked and threw down his hat, which was a considerable feat for a monster without arms. “Maybe a few scars’ll make you think I’m telling the truth!”
“If you want it, I’ll give it to you so you won’t forget it the next morning!” said the Terrapin and growled, charging.
Not knowing what to do since his bluff had been called, the timid Goomba wrapped himself in a defensive curl and lay low on the ground. Instead of a bone-shattering kick, however, all he received was the shock of silence. Worried, he opened his eyes and looked around in vain for his partner.
“Scud?” he called nervously, scampering to his feet. “Scud, you there?”
“Who’s Scud?”
“Aiieee!” the Goomba screamed and turned pale as a Magikoopa landed before him. “W-where did you come from? I mean, a pleasure to see you, Supreme Guildmaster!”
“Who’s Scud?!” Kamek demanded and wrapped his hands around the Goomba.
“My friend, Scud’s my friend! He was going to rough me up, so I closed my eyes, and now he’s gone. I swear, I didn’t do anything!”
“Waste of carbon!” Kammy spat, landing behind them. “Drop him, I think I see two shadows moving up the cliffs ahead.”
“You’re right, but I can’t make out the species,” he said and threw the Goomba over his shoulder. “Kammy, go up the western shoulder, I’ll meet you along the apex of the two paths. That Terrapin must have had something they want.”
“Scud?” the Goomba opened his mouth and instantly regretted it. “He never had anything in his whole life. Maybe a few coins saved up, but he never told me about it if it was true.”
“Interesting,” Kamek said, considering the skyline. After a moment, he reached into his robes and tossed the Goomba a large emerald coin. “Bribe the taskmaster with that, and he might promote you to a less dangerous job. Don’t speak of this to anyone.”
“Uh-huh,” the creature nodded, but the two Magikoopas were off before he could thank them properly.
~*~*~*~
Two Spikesters shrouded in black made their way slowly up the treacherous hills of the mountainside. Despite all their months of training for this one kidnapping, the task seemed too great for them to finish.
King Bowser knew no one except his own soldiers had any reason to be in the newly ordained Koopa Valley, and the unceasing mind eyes of the Magikoopas were always open for invaders.
Any undocumented movement or entrance was detected immediately and terminated before it could cause a problem. Once a stray Goonie postman from the Pipe Maze had gotten winded in a violent storm and unwittingly passed over the construction site of the palace. He was found out within five minutes and banished to the unforgiving dungeons of the Keep, even now rotting away in the darkness of the underground.
“We were told this guy would be heavy, but nobody warned me about the smell!”
“You’re right, he’s not very pleasant,” the other Spikester grumbled. “It’s only another hundred feet to the summit, though. There should be a gunboat standing by for pick-up.”
“Won’t the king be so proud of us? None of the other guys could’ve pulled this off without spraining a spine.”
“Deliciously evil,” the Spikester called back, relishing in laughter.
The other joined in, and soon the air was filled with their raspy voices. A strong wind cut short their enjoyment, though, and overwhelmed their screaming with a blast of cackles from farther down the cliff. Ravaging and cold as northern ice, the sound silenced them and shook loose massive boulders from above.
“W-what was that?”
“Magikoopas, you idiot! They heard us!”
“And saw you from a mile away,” Kammy said, hovering near them on her broom. “You two bulky spike rats are about as well-trained as a glass of mulch.”
“So why not give up this failed mission and tell us who sent you?” Kamek continued, floating down next to his cousin. “With any luck, we might make your termination painless and bypass the usual eighty years sub-level.”
“Don’t tell them anything, Gammer,” one of the soldiers spat back. “They’ll have to kill us.”
“The little whelp is right,” Kammy said, grinning. “He’s got us in a bind, Kamek!”
The blue-robed sorcerer gave a contemptuous snort and set the Spikester afire with a wave of his wand. Writhing in the intense heat, the soldier plummeted to the ground and left his partner struggling to hold the Terrapin’s body.
“Would you like to join the roast?” Kamek sneered. “Then give us a name!”
Before the Spikester could stutter out something, a three-meter deep section of the rock behind him exploded outward in a boiling mix of dust and shrapnel. Kammy shrieked as a fragment of stone sliced across her face and barely managed to construct a barrier before the full brunt of the blast caught her. More intuitive than his fellow Magikoopa, Kamek didn’t receive a scratch and was already tracking the sky for the origin of the missile.
“Found it!” Kammy exclaimed proudly. “An A-class gunboat traveling west at 150… 170 miles per hour. We’ll never be able to catch up with it from here.”
“It won’t matter anyway,” said Kamek, growling. “A gunboat from the Koopa army, Spikesters… It seems Iggy has finally decided to attempt revenge for his punishment.”
“After losing the Exultant, you would think the sniveling brat would’ve learned his lesson.”
“Once a traitor always a traitor,” Kamek smiled, turning back to the castle. “It’s infectious, just like any other pull for vengeance. Lord Bowser must be notified immediately.”
“You hang on his word as if he were a mystic of the Guild itself. I miss the old days, when Vermik and I were your sole counsel.”
“Then you are a fool, dear cousin. But it doesn’t take a mystic to know that.”
~*~*~*~
The Koopa King paced angrily before his throne while the two Magikoopas waited for a response. Sprawling with velvet tapestries and golden carvings, the room had the usual impression of a deity’s chamber, but now that several Tropacine maps and construction blueprints were scattered everywhere, it looked more like a trash heap. To be completely honest, of course, Bowser preferred the look.
“So he sacrifices two of his elite soldiers to kidnap a…”
“Correct, sir, a Terrapin,” said Kamek. “He was on quarry duty with a Goomba, and his name was Scud. We checked their records and found nothing of interest. Both are about as dull as the rock they were digging into.”
“Then it doesn’t make any sense!” Bowser growled and took a bite out of a half-eaten liver. Where he’d gotten it wasn’t so much worth asking. “Iggy’s always told me I needed to stop using Terrapins for primary infantry. It makes sense he’d need one to find out how to breed more from Koopa stock, but him sending Spikesters to get the job done doesn’t sound like he’s changed his mind about using them.”
“And why go to such desperate measures to take one from the palace?” Kammy considered, staring pensively out a window to examine the troops below. “There are Terrapins all over the world. It had to be something exclusive to the ones we breed together here.”
“Or to that soldier specifically,” Kamek continued, holding one clawed finger to his head. “Yes, that would seem to be the solution, but there’s nothing unique about this Scud fellow, at least that we found.”
“Then double your efforts,” Bowser said with a grin. “Or better yet, send Vermik to do it. He has a knack for slinking around.”
“At last his putrid reputation is of use!” Kamek shouted triumphantly, nudging the other Magikoopa. “Your protégé is not so worthless after all.”
“If it pleases you, Sire,” said Kammy, “then I’ll leave out your illustrious praise when I brief him.”
“Briefing? Oh, is that what you call it?” Bowser stifled a chortle and turned to Kamek with one hand raised. “High five!”
“You honor me, Your Highness,” said the sorcerer, returning the favor.
Kammy groaned heavily as she walked out and slammed the door on their laughing.
~*~*~*~
Meanwhile, the changeling Magikoopa was deep in thought within the confines of his own private chambers. Acidic rain began to fall from the broiling mixture of toxins that veined the smog-filled clouds, but even watching the grunt soldiers burn in agony couldn’t bring Vermik out of his ill mood. There was something dark and twisting on the edge of his thoughts, biting away at his resolve, but no mind probe he attempted gave any relief.
Ever since the destruction of the Breaking Shrine and the beginning of Bowser’s grand scheme for the Koopa Empire, things had become less exciting. He didn’t miss being on the brink of worldwide destruction, of course, but the intrigue and promises of ancient power fulfilled some grave element of his soul. Any price wouldn’t have been too high for regaining that feel of impending triumph, and he wanted more than everything to revive it.
He was jolted from his point of meditation by a sharp knock at the door. “Come in.”
Kammy glided in wordlessly, shutting the room with a wave of her claws. She knew something wasn’t all it was supposed to be, though, when she saw Vermik sitting dejectedly at the side of his bed.
“Why so melancholy?”
“I was only being thoughtful, Guildmistress. No matter how visually appealing it might be, the smoke here is so thick that it clouds my actions. All I’ve ever known is Bowser’s Keep.”
“Which the grubby little Mushroomers have surely looted by now,” she said with a snort. “You must clarify your thinking sooner than later, I’m afraid. A new mission has come up, and it’ll mean not joining us on the Meridian expedition if you don’t resolve it in the next few days.”
“Actually, that might be just the thing I need,” he said more brightly than usual, standing up. “Please tell me it involves strangling someone.”
“There’s a definite possibility it’ll come to that,” Kammy replied, showing a jagged tooth. “A few hours ago, one of Iggy’s gunboats tried to make off with a Terrapin. His name was Scud, and he was working with a Goomba in the Quarry Team B-23. Fortunately, we forced their hand, and they had to kill him and the kidnappers.”
“And you want me to find out what reason Iggy would have for taking only one of such an abundant resource?”
“Precisely, my apprentice,” said the witch, “and speaking of that, there will be a reward for the successful completion of this mission. Once you return with the purpose of the kidnapping, I shall give you your freedom as a full Magikoopa. From an Adept to an Apprentice, you have already advanced, but now the level of Sorcerer awaits you.”
“I anticipate the moment of your approval with eagerness, Guildmistress,” he said and gave a solemn bow. “Of course, I’d be lying if I didn’t say I’d expected the promotion sooner. Since when did Kamek allow the move?”
“He didn’t,” she said sharply, turning away. “I gained the approval from Bowser himself when Kamek took leave last month. As far as I know, he’s still not aware of it.”
“But I thought Kamek made it clear Guild relations were to operate outside the royal eye.”
“He did, until recently. It was a ploy to wrap Bowser tighter around his claws. Unfortunately for him, he neglected to notice it also put advancement approvals under the king’s own authority. Our dear Kamek wouldn’t make much of an attorney, I’m afraid.”
“True,” Vermik snickered, “though he has seemed rather distracted lately. Could it be too much musing on the purpose of your desire to excavate Meridian?”
“Something along those lines, I’m sure. It needn’t worry us, however, when there’s so much more to attract our attentions. Primary, of course, is your completing this little investigation. You’ll get started immediately, I assume.”
“Right now in fact,” said Vermik, grabbing his broom. “What did you say the Goomba’s name was, the one working with Scud?”
“Hmm, I don’t believe we found it,” she said, looking disappointed. “He seemed ignorant, and Kamek sent him off to bribe the unit boss.”
“Then tracking him will be a complete joy,” Vermik groaned and hovered into the air, dropping quickly.
“Couldn’t have planned it better myself!” the old hag cackled and left in search of the archives.