By Mario Fan
Author's Note: An appendix for this
volume can be found here.
Click the link to open the appendix in a new window. You can then browse
through it at your leisure without losing your place in the story.
Chapter Three: Vacation Troubles
Birabuto, Sarasaland
Jade hills framed the cloudless skyline behind Caroline Village, eventually meeting with the higher, snow-capped mountains that rose into pale turquoise and mist. To the east of the small settlement were hundreds of miles of pastoral farmland cut through in places by thin forests brimming with oaks and darker evergreens. Farther south lay the infinite Tylean Ocean that connected all the countries of Sarasaland and the warm beaches stretched out between the earth and sea.
The people of Caroline didn’t consider the vastness of the surrounding lands in their everyday life, though, and made good simply by going about their normal routine. A group of young Mushroomers boasted of bloody fights in an alley behind the bakery, and the town elders sat around in rocking chairs near the square discussing the last vote at the courthouse. Even the Paratroopa post officers always finished their routes four hours ahead of schedule and spent the rest of the morning gossiping.
Of course the most talked about topic in town was the arrival of Luigi and Rezan. They were currently staying at the local inn after drifting into town at 3 o’clock during the morning, and a crowd of nosy people were all but lounging in the lobby of the place to get a glimpse of the pair.
“They say it’s Luigi, all right, but the other one’s not Mario,” an older Mushroomer was saying to his friend. “Some ugly reptile thug. Since when do the Brothers hang out with scum like that?”
“You know, my grandson, he just came back from Seaside on shore leave, and he tells me the whole lot of ‘em over there haven’t been the same since the big flood. News is already getting around that Bowser’s building up his army again, too.”
“Well, I’d like to see that devil of a lizard try and poke around down here. We’re no pacifists like those Mushroom Kingdom wimps. We don’t take any sneaking around.”
“Shh, shh, they’re coming!” someone near the front of the crowd shouted, and everyone leaned forward. “Quiet, quiet!”
The entire group of villagers almost fell over as a short Mushroomer boy waddled down the stairwell with an armful of towels about ready to fly out of his hands. When he reached the bottom, an impatient journalist from a nationwide newspaper grabbed his shoulders, and this time the towels did launch out of his arms and land on the heads of those nearby.
“S-sorry, Mr. Gaines, I didn’t know it was you,” said the nervous boy, his eyes widening as he realized how many people were in the room. “Er, what’d I do?”
“Nothing, boy, now listen carefully!” the journalist hissed. “Where are the current tenants of this fine establishment?”
“The… huh?”
“The people staying here, you dimwit!”
“Oh, right,” said the youth, giving an easy smile. “They left a few hours after arriving, but not before paying, of course. Something about their boat breaking down and needing a transport to the capital.”
“Good enough, here’s a copper,” said the newspaperman, and blindly tossed a coin at the boy. He rubbed his head and quickly took out a pen and paper. “Five in the morning, Plumber Hero and Reptilian Comrade Head Off to Chai. For what purpose, though? Hmm…”
He turned his head around, and noticed the entire room of simple villagers were looking straight at him. “Well, don’t just stand there, you country hicks! Someone give me a ride to the nearest airport. There’s another five coppers in it for whoever gets me there the fastest.”
~*~*~*~
There were a few spare rain clouds drifting across the early skyline, but the cover of a thin forest growing up the banks of a hill north of Caroline Village offered protection enough. Luigi was walking easily with a torn pack slung over his shoulders, while Rezan loped quickly ahead in his impatient strides. Ever since the destruction of the Breaking Shrine, he couldn’t get used to not being in a hurry.
The grayness of dawn was already pushed far to the west by the time they came to the hill’s slopes, and they decided to sit for a while on a rocky embankment rising out of the smooth grass. Rushing and bubbling nearby, a stream provided water and a brief distraction while the pair sat catching their wind.
Luigi pulled out a map he had bought on the other side of Birabuto and scanned it for a reference. “It looks like we’re in the Caroline Hills… Hmm, should’ve been able to figure that one out.”
Rezan was kneeling by the stream, taking great swallows of the water with his mouth dipped under the surface. He lifted his head out for a moment and shook it dry. “How much longer until we reach the port?”
“We should be there by nightfall at this rate. I don’t see why you’re so anxious to leave Birabuto, though. It’s more peaceful here than in the Mushroom Valley.”
“I prefer colder climates, places covered with rock mountains and pine forests,” Rezan said with a faraway look on his face. “Sometimes I think I could’ve been a Koopa.”
“Let’s hope not,” the human grumbled, and reached his hand into a side pocket of his backpack. He pulled out a sandwich and a bag of dried vegetables. “Care for some carrots?”
Rezan narrowed his eyes and let out a low growl. “I’ve got my thoughts on a different sort of fare, if you don’t mind. I’ll be back in five minutes or so. Don’t wait up.”
“Woulmm mmmff… mmmf?” Luigi looked up to see that the reptilian mutant had vanished. He swallowed and sat up, brushing a few crumbs off his shirt. “He’s quick, I’ll give him that.”
Luigi started when a sudden silence overtook the clearing, followed by the uncomfortable chirping of some birds nearby. A bush to his left rustled, and he turned on the ends of his feet, his fists clenched.
There was only the sound of the birds again for another minute, so he relaxed and scratched his head. What the…?
“Luigi, my lad!”
“AIIIIIIEEEE!” the plumber screamed and fell flat on the ground, trying frantically to twist right side up. “Who…wha… hunh?”
“Surprised to see me?” said a short, white-haired man with a huge head and spiraling glasses. He had on a rustic sweater and what appeared to be brightly colored swimming trunks.
“Oh, no,” Luigi muttered, and stood up. “Professor Gadd?”
“In the flesh!” the old man beamed. “How’s it been going?”
“Well, for starters…” Luigi paused a moment. “Wait a minute, weren’t you in the Mushroom Kingdom at all during the past few months?”
“Not that I know of,” said the professor, scratching his chin. “I was off in the Tropacine Isles, doing research for my new sand-compatible vacuum cleaners. Beaches, sandals, rugs, it cleans the sand right off of anything without clogging up. You see, I keep the moisture out with a series of complex humidifying-dampeners, and-”
“Never mind, then,” the younger man interrupted, waving his hand. “How did you find us?”
“Us?” The professor squinted and straightened his glasses. “I don’t know about ‘us’, but I found you using an internal global positioning chip. You remember that pound cake I fed you and Mario before the two of you left the lab? Well, I confess it had a little device in it that attached to the outer linings of your small intestine. Completely innocuous, of course!”
“And Mario?” Luigi groaned.
The professor lifted his wrist up and punched a few buttons on his watch. A screen appeared with a red, blinking dot on a large map of Plit. “In the Royal Mushroom Castle, at the moment, possibly the dining room. There are still a few micro-glitches to work out, though. He could actually be in the restroom next to the vault.”
“Perfect. Er, by the way, what’s with the sweater? It’s like eighty degrees out here.”
“What sweater?” the professor shot back, oblivious.
“Nothing, nothing,” Luigi said, and groaned even louder. “Is there anything I can do for you?”
“Do… for… me…” E. Gadd rolled the words around in his mouth. “Ah, yes, of course there is! You don’t think I’d pop out of nowhere without something horribly significant to say, do you?”
“Well…”
“Anyway, after I completed the final designs for the Sand Blaster Vacuum 5000, I was confronted by a friend of Mario’s- a Mr. Merlow.”
“Sounds like a relative of the Shaman in Toad Town, but I don’t recognize the name exactly.”
“He used to rent a room with Merluvee on Star Hill, but he apparently gathered enough coins to move out to Isle Delfino,” said the professor. “I think he was wearing a blue cloak, although it could’ve been a sky color… my memory is a bit hazy.”
“You do remember what he wanted, right?”
“Yes, of course! He said he had an urgent problem, one that required the immediate assistance of his grandfather, Merlon. The lad was awfully cryptic about it, and I could tell he didn’t want to let me in on too much, but it had something to do with the Noki and an impending disaster. There’s always a crisis somewhere, I suppose!”
“It seems that way,” said Luigi, and pressed for more information. “That still doesn’t explain what you’re doing here, though. Shouldn’t you be in the Mushroom Kingdom, looking for Merlon?”
“Well, I was heading there, but I saw on my GPS that you were closer. I thought I’d offer you up the mission and save time. I’m a very busy man, after all, and not prone to heroics and jet-setting.”
“Naturally, but I’m on a vacation. I suggest you go fetch Mario and Merlon and tell them about all this. There’s nothing I could do alone, anyway.”
“Oh, bother,” the professor said. “I was afraid you might say this, but you can’t blame an old man for trying to loosen his load. Well, if you can’t help, perhaps you wouldn’t mind sparing the coins for a flight to the Mushroom Kingdom?”
“Sure, no problem,” Luigi said and pulled a small bag out of his pocket. “This should cover it. Enough for first class even.”
As E. Gadd snatched the money into his lab coat, a sudden growing blast of mechanical noise blistered in the air above them. The trees around the clearing thrashed heavily in the top winds bearing down, and the water from a spring radiated out of the center.
Luigi covered the glare of the sun with his hands, and scanned the clouds. The shadow of the vessel cast a wide darkness over the grass before it hovered into view and slowly descended. Mostly unfazed, the two men on the ground kept their eyes trained on what appeared to be a military copter and backed up as it came to a roaring stop.
“Is this the ‘we’ you mentioned?” the professor asked hopefully.
“No, I’ve never seen them,” he said. “But those markings are Sarasalian. They have to know it’s me.”
Three Mushroomers in full uniform vaulted out of the cargo hatch when it slid open, each of them sporting a jet black pair of sunglasses and a powerful star rifle slung across his shoulder. They spread out in a triangular formation and saluted when a Koopa of higher rank stepped lightly out of the copter.
“Luigi,” he nodded, and turned his head. “Professor E. Gadd. Welcome to the both of you, on behalf of the Sarasalian Nationalists.
“Nationalists,” Luigi said the word, and decided it wasn’t familiar. “Since when did the name change?
“It’s not just the name,” said the Koopa, grinning. “The entire government’s been altered.”
“I know, into a democratic-”
“Try again,” the officer interrupted. “After the former Princess Daisy stepped down and allowed the Consortium to take over, she moved to Poshley Heights in Salinia. The controlling Senators and the State Executive were failing badly to stabilize the economy, and poverty levels had risen to an all-time high. Just last autumn, they sent a diplomat to secure a new trade agreement with the Mushroom Kingdom, after it was apparent a democracy couldn’t coincide with isolationism.”
“Master Brego,” Luigi said, remembering Peach’s meeting with him shortly before the flood. “He left in a hurry, but we didn’t have time to meet. Princess Toadstool offered to keep him until the festival was over.”
“He had no interest in making the deal,” the Koopa scoffed, waving a hand. “Brego was a mole for the People’s League of Equality, a group advocating socialism to cure the onslaught of hunger and corrupt administration. He never returned, but the appearance of a failed deal was only strengthened. In the aftermath of the Mushroom Kingdom’s own troubles, two leading members of the Consortium—who also happened to be top PLE activists—were able to dissolve the loyalists and begin the National Sarasalian State.”
“So that’s why we haven’t heard much from here in so long,” Luigi growled. “I’m assuming this little revolution of yours wasn’t bloodless?”
“No more than the thousands who died in the streets after the old parliament was destroyed. Princess Daisy abandoned us, just as things were getting rough. Now we have new leaders, though, strong leaders. The Mushroom Kingdom is no longer our savior. We are independent at last.”
“That’s a good thing, I agree,” said Luigi, looking around. “How come we haven’t heard anything about this in Birabuto?”
“Birabuto is the most rural territory of all Sarasaland, and the news of the revolution hasn’t spread yet,” said the Koopa. “That’s why we were concerned by your little excursion here.”
“It’s only a vacation,” said Luigi, gesturing to his backpack. “Search it if you want.”
“That won’t be necessary. You’re obviously here for pleasure, or else you would’ve known about the turnover. Still, you’ll have to come with us to Chai. The Federation Council will want to speak with you. It’ll be easier than sending a message directly to the Mushroom Senate.”
“I’m guessing I don’t have any choice,” said Luigi, his face expressionless as he caught a glimpse of Rezan waiting in a tree nearby. He slowly shook his head. “Fine, but I can’t stay for more than a day. I want to get back to the Mushroom Kingdom as soon as possible.”
“Of course, of course,” said the Koopa, leading Luigi onto the copter. “Professor, we apologize, but you’ll have to stay behind. Do you need an escort?”
“No, no, I was leaving anyway,” said E. Gadd as he straightened his spectacles. “Nice meeting you, though.”
When the vessel lifted out of sight, the professor shrugged and turned around, only to smash into a taller creature. “Woah, there! I’m armed!”
“Really?” hissed the reptile, and toyed with the end of E. Gadd’s vacuum. “Listen, I am the ‘we’ that Luigi mentioned. My name is Rezan, and I was accompanying him on his vacation—which now seems to have been cut short after all.”
“Sorry to hear that, but why didn’t you go with him? Chai is a splendid city!”
“I’ve heard things,” growled the Reznoth. “This isn’t a joy trip, though. Something was wrong about that encounter, and Luigi sensed it. He didn’t want me to intervene, so he must want us to relay the information back to the princess.”
“Well, then, perfect! I won’t have to find Merlon, now, since you’re likely to bump into him—”
“Not so fast, Professor.” Rezan smirked and grabbed E. Gadd by the collar. “You’re coming with me. A mutant reptile’s not going to walk around the countryside without someone respectable beside him, and you’re the only one who had direct contact with those soldiers and with Merlon’s grandson.”
“I was afraid of that,” the professor said, and lowered his head.