Mario Super Bowl I

By ghettobananachris

Chapter 2: First Quarter

Tumble: And it's going way back, it might even go over the goal posts!

Eldstar: Nope. It's starting to dive, and Lemmy got it!

Tumble: And he’s running up the field, and Nina and Plum are coming up fast. Oh! Roy got Plum, but Nina’s still going! Oh! She slid and hit Lemmy’s ball right out from under him!

Eldstar: Looks like Mario may have been smart at kicking the ball! He got them down at the 24 yard line!

Tumble: So, you think his plan was a good idea?

Eldstar: Um… no. He was just lucky. It’s never smart to kick the ball.

Tumble: 1st and 10, ball on the 24 yard line. And Morton snaps the ball to Bowser, who pulls back, but he switched it to Lakitu. Lakitu’s running 5, 10, 15, 20 yards before he is brought down at the 44 yard line. An obvious first down!

Eldstar: Hey, Lakitu has no knees, so how do the refs know when he is down?

Tumble: Good question, let's go over to our on-field reporter, Forkie from Super Mario RPG.

Eldstar: Wait, reporters are allowed on the field?

Tumble: I don’t know, they’re allowed on the sidelines, though.

Forkie: Well, I‘ll just take a risk. Excuse me Monty, how do you determine when Lakitu is down?

Monty: When Lakitu’s cloud touches the ground, he’s down. Wait, how did you get on the field?

Forkie: Um… back to you, Tumble!

Tumble: Watch out, Forkie! I guess he wasn’t allowed on the field. 1st and 10, ball on the 44 yard line.

Eldstar: Hey! How come you get to do all the plays?

Tumble: Fine! You can do the rest of Bowser’s plays.

Eldstar: Okay! 1st and 10, ball on the 44 yard line. And there goes Bowser! He throws it to Lemmy, but oh! It’s an overthrow!

Tumble: That was a terrible throw! Lets take a look at Bowser’s pass average this year.

Complete: 22
Incomplete: 64

Tumble: That’s sad.

Eldstar: Back to the game. 2nd and 10, ball on the 44 yard line. Bowser pulls back, throws a pass, but oh! It's intercepted by Alex, he’s running, he’s running, and he’s brought down by Wendy at the 17 yard line.

Tumble: Do you have to say “but oh!” for all the plays?

Eldstar: Quiet, Tumble! The next play is starting!

Tumble: Which means I get to do it because I said you could only do Bowser’s plays!

Eldstar: Darn it!

Tumble: 1st and 10, ball on the 17 yard line. Remember, this Super Bowl game is sponsored by Mario Kart, the movie “The Man Who Couldn‘t Do Simple Addition“, and Chuckola.

Eldstar: Why do we need to remember that?

Tumble: So we can get paid! Mario’s got the ball, and he passes to Baby Luigi, who runs straight through the defense! Not a smart move! Baby Luigi is dog piled at the 13 yard line!

Eldstar: I hope he’s okay.

(Paramedics walk up to Baby Luigi, and then run back off the field.)

Tumble: It looks like he’ll be fine. He’s pretty tough considering at least a thousand pounds of weight just piled on top of him!

Eldstar: Ball on the 13 yard line, 2nd and 6.

Tumble: Hey! It’s my play! And why are you talking like that?

Eldstar: To be original.

Tumble: Whatever. 2nd and 6, blah blah blah blah blah. And the ball’s in play! Mario’s passes and Kate catches it, she’s going to the end zone, the defense can’t do anything! And SCORE! MARIO!

(Kate jumps in the air and cheers, then falls down onto her knees and cheers again.)

MSS: 6
BLZ: 0

Eldstar: Looks like they’re trying for a 2-point conversion. And there goes Mario, and he is brought down, but wait! He doesn’t have the ball! Luigi does! He’s going towards the end zone… but he’s brought down by Chargin’ Chuck!

Tumble: 6 to 0, with 7 minutes on the clock.

Eldstar: It’s been 8 minutes already?

Tumble: More like 20, but football is very slow. Wiggler’s up to kick and it's up!

Eldstar: It's going, it's going, and it landed in the end zone!

Tumble: Looks like Bowser’s starting at the twenty. He pulls back and passes to Roy. Roy breaks through the defense, he might go all the way! He’s at the 50, 40, 30, 20, 10, touchdown! Wow! That was a great play!

Eldstar: Not for Mario. His defense is way to weak to compete with Roy.

MSS: 6
BLZ: 6

Tumble: Looks like the score is even. Bowser’s trying for a field goal, and it's good!

MSS: 6
BLZ: 7

Eldstar: That was quick! That is obviously going to be a highlight!

Tumble: The kick was pretty normal, I don’t see why it should be a highlight.

Eldstar: I meant the touchdown.

Tumble: Oh! Sorry!

Eldstar: Anyway, Super is kicking with 5:43 left on the clock.

Tumble: That took a minute!?!

Eldstar: The kick and the run were pretty long.

Tumble: And the kick is up. It goes back and Harry’s got it! He runs up and is sacked at the 32 yard line.

Eldstar: 1st and 10, Mario pulls back and throws, and Luigi jumps to get it but he is tackled by Larry. And there’s a flag on the play!

(Monty walks onto the field.)

Monty: Holding, offense, on Pianta, 5 yard penalty, second down.

Tumble: Let’s see a replay of that.

(Pianta grabs Chargin’ Chuck to stop him from getting to Mario.)

Eldstar: Pianta’s got to watch those penalties. He set the record this season for most penalties.

Tumble: Probably because it’s the first season and barely anyone got penalties but him!

Eldstar: Well excuse me! Ball on the 27 yard line. Mario’s back and he passes to Baby Mario, Bowser’s coming for him!

Tumble: Baby Mario slipped right in between his legs! He’s going but Ludwig got him down at the 35 yard line.

Eldstar: 3rd and 7, ball on the 35 yard line. Mario gets the ball and passes it, it's incomplete! And there’s the two minute warning!

Tumble: This will be the first time someone’s going to punt in this game.

Eldstar: Maybe they won’t punt.

Tumble: Nope. They are. Wiggler’s coming onto the field. The ball’s back and there’s the punt. It’s going back far. Morton’s got it. He’s running, but he’s not getting too far.

Eldstar: He is one of the slowest players on Bowser’s team, I don’t know why he caught it.

Tumble: Morton’s down at the 27 yard line.

Eldstar: Let’s go check in on Forkie to see if he can tell us why Morton caught it.

(Forkie is being chased by security.)

Forkie: I don’t think I should go on the field again to ask him!

(Forkie drops his mic and it’s cruched by the security guard's feet. A loud screeching noise is heard.)


(The screeching stops.)

Eldstar: Thank you, although I maybe deaf now.


Eldstar: YES! I CAN! But you don’t need to scream. I guess my hearing’s fine.

Tumble: Whoops! We missed a play!

Eldstar: Lets get it up on replay.

It shows Bowser pulling back, and he is rushed by Nina and Noki, so Bowser runs and is brought down by Pianta and Luigi at the 31 yard line.

Tumble: Okay so that is 2nd and 6, ball on the 31 yard line. Oh. A timeout is called with 40 seconds on the clock.

Eldstar: Why would they want to stall out the end of the first quarter?

Tumble: I don’t know! I’m not an experienced sportscaster!

Eldstar: Anyways, they are back on the field, and Bowser is playing this time, he pulls back but he switches it off to Iggy!

Tumble: Iggy runs to the 34 yard line. Everyone’s back in position, and Bowser gets the ball and knee downs, ending the first quarter!

Eldstar: That was an impressive and short first quarter.

Tumble: It only seemed that way because we had no commercials!

Eldstar: Why don’t we?

Tumble: It’s the first Super Bowl! Did you watch the first one in America? It was terrible! I mean, a marching band at halftime!

Eldstar: Well, let's hope the second quarter will be impressive, and that our halftime be better than theirs!

To Be Continued...

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