I have decided to keep a single log, divided by days, about our vacation. Yes, Bowser has given Kamek and I permission to take a 2-month-long vacation. He debated sending Larry along, the Koopaling being very eager to do so, but decided against it. Kamek and I have decided to go to the Mushroom Kingdom first. Kamek seems determined that I learn.
Day 1
We have talked to Princess Peach. She
says that I am very cute *blush* (it makes her happy), and Mario is starting
to give me ugly looks behind the princess' back. Oh! We are in the princess'
Dining Room. It is very large, and it would be nice, but the princess is
having another party (#273 she tells me), and there are builders and remodelers
everywhere. Wooster had to put in the basement, because he was going crazy
with all the dust and dirt the people where making.
We had chicken and turkey, and here comes dessert. CAKE!!! Vanilla, by the smell of it.
* * *
Peach has rented us a boat to sail on. I have in my possession a few books, all correlating to the Mushroom Kingdom. I also have a few slices of cake tucked away. Kamek is looking at maps, trying to decide where we are going. I am sailing the boat. To where, Kamek has not decided. So I’m heading towards those pointy rocks.
* * *
Kamek saved us. He happened to look up from the map. He quickly blasted the rocks out of the way, and immediately toke the helm. I’m bored. And I have nothing to do.
Well, not exactly. See, the memories that Dad had, are very blurry when it comes to his long time in the shell of magic that trapped him for so long. I believe that Dad occupied his time creating other species, which he promptly ate. He made them fierce, cunning, and powerful. But not as powerful as him. He was smarter than that stupid Yoshi Mage.
So, I’m gonna try and make my own race of slaves. BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
Yeah… um… It’s going well, and all I need to figure out is how it will hatch from its egg.
Hmmm… I suppose that if you… no, that wouldn’t work…
Oh! I forgot. My gun is done. Kamek says we’re going to Rogueport. He says that he never went there, and that he’ll not have Kammy go somewhere that he hasn’t. I laugh. I’m gonna carry my gun on a belt around my waist. I’ll refill it with bullets by magic. Magic rocks.
* * *
After a long nap, we have made it to Rogueport. Its night time, so Kamek has decided to sleep on the boat, about 20 feet from shore. We’re gonna put up the magic defenses, and as he sleeps, I’m gonna start making my race. BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
Day 2
We are very happy so far. We landed,
and first we went to explore the town. We found a little Goomba girl running
around in a house full of maps and books and the like. We threw her in
the yellow trash can that was in the house, and then we stole everything.
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
We ran. Well, I ran, and Kamek was on my back. He’s not heavy, so I don’t mind.
* * *
We are in an underground city beneath Rogueport. I fell down a rusty drain hole. I was very angry about it, until Kamek noticed the lights. We followed them, and there it was, a rather small city, but it was still there. We asked a Shy Guy about the place, and he said that there was a city the size of Rogueport here! We are trying to find everything.
* * *
We have found a large door, and a platform in front of it. Kamek jumped up and said he knew what it was! It was the Thousand-Year Door. I personally think it’s been there 1,012 years, but hey. We also found a “Pit of 100Trails” or something. I’m gonna jump in.
* * *
It wasn’t much. Just some idiots throwing themselves at me. I just burned them all. The worst part is, all the treasure chests were open and empty *sigh*. It did take a while though, so it’s almost night time now. We’re going back to the ship. Also, I made 23 eggs last night. They are very small.
Day 3
We flew to this large tree. When we
went inside, some little worm thingy started yelling at me. I stepped on
it. It was very slimy. Unfortunately, a large amount of the slimy things
and a large amount of little, flying bugs started to attack me. Kamek ran
away. I need to have a talk with him. Right after I get out of the dumb,
red cage they put me in. How, I have no idea. I think that the large number
of slugs and bugs allowed them to overpower me. There is strength in numbers!
* * *
I burst out and am now trying to secure myself in the deep underground place I’ve found myself in. No word from Kamek. I have destroyed a pipe that the bugs could use to get in. There is a trickle of water coming from the roof, so there is no fear of dehydration. There are some large statues of the slugs that are currently serving as a blockade against intrusion. Wait! Here they come.
* * *
I forgot my magic. *blush* I teleported out of there. Kamek was smiling.
“I wondered how long it would be until you remembered,” he said, still smiling that infernal smile.
“I wondered how long it would be until you remembered,” I mocked.
We’re going back to the ship.
Currently 21 eggs. The others were lost to the cause. *sniff*
Day 4
We are going back to the Keep. There
we are going to plan a new location. I’m sick of this island, and Kamek
is very disturbed. You try having a bunch of bugs and slugs with lights
on their heads shoved halfway down your throat, and not be grumpy enough
to blast half a city to embers. The Piantas were NOT happy.
Currently 52 eggs. My army will crush
the puny slugs and I will conquer that large tree!!!
Day 5
We are leaving the Keep, now towards
a destination of my choosing. I am thinking of just soaring about… And
I have decided to rent a plane from Peach and fly about. Bowser has reconsidered,
and Larry will be joining us. Lemmy would come along, but he says the tourists
won’t let him be gone for two months. Stupid tourists. I know, I’m one
too, but I would let Lemmy go for at least two months…
We are off to see the princess, the wonderful princess of. Oz?
* * *
We have taken off in Peach’s personal plane. We are gonna fly over the ocean. Wendy’s part is first. There’s Sea Shell City! It is back up and running! Wendy is fast. Ah well…
For interest, I’ll add sound affects….
Bam! Larry fired the Bullet Bill cannon.
Bam! He fired again.
Proap! I sent a good 73,000 degree Celsius flame down.
A building collapsed under Larry’s fire, and I destroyed a good section of the work district. First the flame, then the shockwave…. Yeah, that was nice.
Oh… Looks like Wendy was in town. She’s ordering the defenses about. Wait! Roy’s here! He saw the commotion! We automatically win. Wendy can’t face us both!
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
Excuse me. I can’t type and fight and enjoy it all at once. Well, I can, but I won’t.
* * *
Well, Sea Shell City is completely destroyed. Wendy fled, her bow askew, crying and having a major temper tantrum. It's like, a TEMPER TANTRUM!!!
Yeah… like that.
I’m laughing. Roy sent some wind our way, and we’re speeding off.
‘To conquer the ocean, To conquer all of its seas, To conquer the blue wide ocean, I need a boat and a breeze!’
I like it. Nice little sea shanty.
Larry, Kamek, and I are singing it. Kamek is flying the plane, and Larry and I are playing “Who can kill the most fishermen with Bullet Bills”.
I’ve got 4… no, 44 now.
Larry is good, and he has 32. He would have had more, but I used magic to send my Bills over faster. Oh…. Larry noticed me typing. And he read about the magic. I’m laughing, but Larry is not amused. I’ll make it up to him. A nice SMACK! should do the trick. Come here, Larry. No running to Kamek, Larry. I want you right here, Larry.
No, I’m not that mean.
Anyways, we have enough fuel to fly for two or three days, and I’m bushed. I’m off to bed.
Also, I rounded the eggs off at 100. The original 21 eggs are growing rapidly, and the others are starting to follow. I’m a little worried. The realm in which I keep my stuff does not let time pass in it. So I can’t put the eggs there. And the eggs will grow large. And I don’t want anyone to notice, until they hatch. Hmmm…
Day 6
I have heard from someone called Slimer49’r.
He says that the Logs do not contain enough information, and that worries
me. I have read his first Fun Fiction, and am in the process of reading
the second. Reading the first one raised an interesting question.
I was made to be, immortal. Death would still be here if Playful hadn’t done his little trick, robbing my father of his immortality and his Magic.
Oh, he had Magic, but it wasn’t Magic
like I use. Manipulating the fabric of time and space and all that.
But I digress. The point is, I am supposedly
the most powerful. So, if I came about another immortal being, like a god,
who would be the most powerful? Something to ponder…
Really.
* * *
FOOD!!!
We are at a restaurant on Isle Delfino. There is sushi here, one of my favorite dishes. Larry is having a salad, and Kamek is having roasted salmon and fried Blooper legs. I am, of course, having SUSHI!!! Which is here now…
* * *
Ah… a good meal. I am very satisfied.
Now, we are in Pinna Park. I am on the Yoshi ride, and Larry is talking
to the Deku Tree. Kamek, for his part, is sunbathing on the beach. I am
having fun. Also, I brought the eggs here, in a special incubation device.
They are being roasted, and are starting to grow faster. My army will soon
be complete! And I decided to make another 300 eggs. A round 400. Not a
bad start. The ride's ended. Ah well. I think Lemmy would have enjoyed
this place. Lots of water ride and the sort. ‘Course, it is hot. But that’s
what the cooling breeze is for. The Park is not very crowded. I heard something
about a storm.
Oh! Here come a few Isle Delfino Yoshis!
I will converse with them. My goal is to gain allies in every Yoshi tribe.
Then, Victory will be mine! Whatever Victory is… I didn’t memorize the
whole dictionary!
* * *
We are off! It is night. And I now have many friends with the Isle Delfino Yoshis. The eggs are large, but I have put them in the back of the cargo area. Larry is asleep, curled up like a baby. I’ll go join him.
Day 7
It is currently 2:00 at night. I know,
a bad time to wake up. But still, there’s a HUGE storm about a mile ahead.
Kamek says that the next realm we are going to visit, Oceanius, a realm
that once belonged to Bowser’s great-great-grandpa, is right beyond that
HUGE storm. Oh boy. Here we GO!!!
* * *
AhShggjdlhn~!!! We are getting hit harsdjkmf!!!
Kamek is fighslggdjhting for control of the plabnfsdgfdfnbne! The wind
is to muhkvjdflhjglnch! Ljkauhntefjkytgdblqorggttawe6458634^%6434983454u3k34%$&0e9854754t45320
+56errlrjxcyfdstzlkjcxkvsmru2145r3ertu9erntbnv#^%$7
Yeah! We got hit by lightning! My computer almost short-circuited!!! Oh no… aljkeasdfhlgjf
Day 9
This is the first time I have been
able to type in two days.
Ooohhh… we are really in a jam. A dilemma that is, not strawberry conserve. We are currently in the eye of the hurricane. Kamek and I are using magic to hold the ship up and to keep it moving in the same direction of the storm. I am not sure of how to put the engine back in. It got blasted out of the plane.
Bad news. Really Bad. The cargo area was totaled. The eggs are lost. *sniff* I promised myself I wouldn’t cry!
WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!
*sniff* Ah well. They had a good run.
Larry needs my help fixing the tail fin.
* * *
Lifting the stuff is no problem for me, it’s figuring out where they go…
Kamek and Larry and I can’t figure out where the engine goes. I’m gonna go online for a while, take a rest.
* * *
The engine goes in the front?! That’s what the people in Lemmy’s Chat Room said.
But, how to install it? Larry (with my help) fixed the underside. Kamek (without my help) fixed the outside and a little bit of the inside. I (with my help) fixed everything else (the rest of the inside, along with helping Larry), and now Larry and I are gonna try to fix the engine. Here we go.
* * *
We have fixed the plane, and are going to try to fly through the other side of the hurricane. Also, we have trajectorized the hurricane's path to go into either Bowser’s or Peach’s domain. Time to travel!
Day 11
First time I’ve been able to type in
a while.
Kamek is in the Oceanius hospital. Sad, really.
Oh… Um… We put magic shields around the plane, one by me, and one by Kamek around the plane and my shield. Kamek’s shield survived three hits by lightning, but mine survived eight! Hail me! But then the bad thing happened. A large rock flew into the plane, and Kamek got hit on the head. The plane started to fall into the sea, but I dragged Kamek away from the cockpit. Larry grabbed the controls and struggled to gain control of the plane. He managed, obviously. Otherwise I wouldn’t be here. He got us out of the hurricane pretty quickly. I gave Larry a hug and my last Yoshi Cookie. I can Magic more up anyways.
We landed on Oceanius’s Emergency Airstrip, and then we alerted the authorities to Kamek’s condition. They rushed here right away, and Larry and I were rushed to the nearest playground. The people said it was to relieve any trauma we might have. I laughed like crazy. I am immortal. I could not have been killed, no matter how powerful that storm was. Also, what trauma could a person get from that experience? It just breeds a healthy dislike for hurricanes. No big deal.
Then, the people said that Kamek would be in the hospital for about three days, so Larry and I would be taken to a hotel.
I was happy, until I found out it was 1/2-star hotel. Not even 1/2 stars. I burned the place down. Then they put us in a 5-star hotel. Go Brute Force!!! (Not the game, which I stole and beat today.)
Larry and I had FUN!!! Pillow fights, videogames, you name it, we had it (if the hotel offered it)!
This was the end of the 10th day.
Now it’s the 11th. First Larry and I finished the pillow fight we decided to postpone for bedtime, and then we went to visit Kamek. I didn’t burn the hotel down, but I did eat the manager. People ran away to this big, shiny building. We ran away to the drab hospital.
I will say this. Even though Oceanius’s people (some are Mushroomers, some Koopas, but most of them are a strange, fish-like people) have stupid psychological treatments, and try to rip you off, they really care about the people’s health. Kamek was in a HUGE, COMFY bed. And he had EVERYTHING. He was living better than Bowser on a really good day. We laughed about his injury, and we talked about other random subjects. That took up half the day. The rest of the day was spent with the ceremonies necessary to make me official ruler of Oceanius. I was stunned. It seems the people that ran to the big, shiny building had run to tell the government then in place that there was a monster that might destroy everything! The government held a heated debate, and finally decided to make me king. I told them I’d settle for crown prince. Those government dudes are really smart. I like them.
Now, I have a larger navy than Wendy. My new realm is twice the size of Water and Ice Land combined! I will now enjoy a nice evil laugh.
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
All in all, I don’t think I’m gonna
do much with this place…
Day 12
It is currently 3:00 in the afternoon.
We have left the now-mine empire, and have continued, at a faster, stronger,
more luxurious plane. I like this. A lot. Go me! Go me! It’s my birthday!
It’s my birthday! Sdvkjl Ouch. Larry hit me on the head with a shovel.
He doesn’t like me singing. He is now free falling, with no parachute.
Darn Koopaling. Wait. No para-
* * *
Phew… Larry is okay. I managed to save him. The poor guy is watching TV.
I have no clue of where we are going next. Kamek says it’ll take a long time to get there, but he refuses to tell me or Larry where it is.
On a happier note, I have created 500
eggs, and I have quickened the rate of growth.
Day 17
I AM BORED!!! B-O-R-E-D-EXCLAMATION
MARK.
There is nothing to do on this stupid plane!!! We can’t play the fisherman game ‘cause there are no fishermen out here. Larry is sleeping. He had Kamek cast a spell to make him sleep for a few days. He was VERY bored. Kamek is flying the plane, as usual. I’m sitting here BORED!!! *sigh* Kamek says one more day until we get there.
To Be Continued...
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