Survivor IV: Isle Delfino

By Blue Virus

Red Virus: You've gotta be kidding.

Blue Virus: Nope! I'm doing a Survivor parody and there's nothing you can do about it!

Yellow Virus: Why?

Blue: Well, everyone's done it!

Red: No they haven't.

Blue: Nonetheless, I thought it would be cool.

Red: You think everything's cool.

Blue: Why don't we just start the show already?

***

Blue Virus, Host with the Most: We all know what's going on now. It's another Survivor, this time on the island of Delfino. Our sixteen players will be on this island for a total of 39 days, where they'll have to go through grueling challenges for a grand prize of a million coins. However, every three days a player will be sent home. The one left will get the prize. The players are split into masses, one being the Good Guys and the other being the Baddie Brigade. They will each follow their maps' directions to their campsite once we get to Delfino. For now, our contestants are on a plane of all things. They cannot look or speak to each other while on this plane, and-

Mario: Hey, Weege! Pass me the pasta sauce.

Luigi: Sure thing, Bro.

Goomba: This seat is uncomfortable!

Blue: Shut up! What are you doing, trying to make me look bad?

All: Yes.

Blue: Ah, I figured as much. The players for the Good Guys are...

Mario, Plump Plumber
Luigi, Lean n' Green
Peach, Distressed Princess
Daisy, Troubling Tomboy
Wario, Sneaky Scoundrel
Waluigi, Smart-Aleck Sibling
Toad, Fleet-Footed Fungus
Yoshi, Hungry Hungry Dino

...and the players for the Baddie Brigade are...

Goomba, Minion of Minions
Koopa, Shelled Soldier
Buzzy Beetle, Armored Arthropod
Lakitu, Cloudy Clod
Spiny, Spiky Shell-Thing
Cheep Cheep, Flopsy Fish
Bob-omb, Explosive Extraordinaire
Shy Guy, Masked Man

Now, I predict something bad's going to happen to us in about... ooh, five minutes, so get ready for an emergency, everyone!

Koopa: WE'RE GONNA DIE IN FIVE MINUTES?!

Shy Guy: Oh, no...

Mario: Quick! Load the food and supplies onto Yoshi's back!

Yoshi: Why me?

Luigi: You're the pack-mule.

Yoshi: Yoshi no pack-mule!

Yoshi eats some oats out of a paper bag.

Toad: I'll help carry the stuff too!

Lakitu: Put all the supplies in my cloud!

Bob-omb: We'd love to, but half of us don't have hands.

Buzzy Beetle: And the ones that do are too weak to carry the stuff!

Koopa: Oh, yeah? I'll show you!

Koopa lifts up a suitcase full of food and tosses it into Lakitu's cloud.

Buzzy Beetle: Correction. Koopa carries the stuff.

Koopa: What? That's unfair!

Goomba: Life's unfair, kid. Get used to it.

Blue: Two minutes until something bad happens!

Koopa: AAAAAAAH!

Mario: We're not gonna make it!

Wario: Yeah we will! Give me the food!

Waluigi: Oh, no. We are not giving you the food.

Yoshi: Yeah, Yoshi no give you food.

Wario: Well, it's just as bad if we give Yoshi the food!

Yoshi: Yoshi have oats to keep him happy.

Yoshi eats another mouthful of oats.

Goomba: Hey! We gotta get packing!

Lakitu: We're all set!

Goomba: Do we have the map?

Lakitu: Yeah.

Goomba: Good. Everybody hop into Lakitu's cloud!

Lakitu: Wha- no!

Koopa: If Buzzy Beetle, Spiny, and I retract into our shells there's gonna be enough room!

Lakitu: Ehh, fine.

All the Baddie Brigade members hop into the cloud.

Lakitu, Cloudy Clod: Spiny hurts.

Meanwhile, the Good Guys are all set for a disaster.

Mario: Might as well spend our last days on Plit doing something we've always wanted.

Mario takes out a platter of pasta carbonara.

Mario: Bon appetite... waaah!

Luigi takes out a Barbie doll.

Luigi: Oh, Veronica! You're so pretty in that outfit!

Peach and Daisy take out guns.

Peach: Might as well have done this years ago.

Peach and Daisy point their guns at the Wario Brothers.

Wario: WAAH!

Waluigi: I'm not scared of that.

Toad sneezes.

Waluigi: OHMYGODAAAH!

Blue: Ten seconds! Nine! Eight! Seven!

The players on each mass sweat.

Blue: Six! Five! Four! Three! Two! One!

Blue pulls out a button and presses it.

Blue: Heh.

KA-BOOOOOOOM!

All: AAAAAH!

The players of each mass fall to their doom... into the oceans of Delfino.

SPLAAAASH!

***

The masses are on the shore of Isle Delfino. Mario and Goomba are the first to wake up.

Mario: Ugh... What a fall.

Goomba: You said it.

Mario: Guys? You alive?

The other Good Guys wake up, spitting out water.

Luigi: Yup.

Peach and Daisy: Yep.

Wario Bros.: Uh-huh.

Toad: Yeah...

Yoshi: Ehh...

The Baddie Brigade members wake up as well.

Spiny: Pain hurts.

Lakitu: Wait, weren't we all in my cloud?

Goomba: The explosion blew us out.

Buzzy Beetle: Yeah, dummy!

Koopa: Oh, dear... Is anybody hurt?

Baddie Brigade: No.

Good Guys: Nope.

Koopa: Good... I was worried!

Mario: Where's the host? Did he die or something?

Blue, Red and Yellow parachute down to the shore.

Blue: Miss us?

Waluigi: Actually, we'd like to get rid of you.

Blue: Good, good.

Waluigi, Smart-Aleck Sibling: I'm seriously starting to question Blue Virus's intelligence.

Blue: Now, as you may know, we're now on Isle Delfino.

Goomba: Isle Delfino? Pssh, this Survivor will be a piece of cake!

Blue: Wait, I didn't tell you which part of Delfino, now did I?

Luigi: Aw, shoot.

Blue: You'll be in this region of Delfino, known as Bianco Valley. This is a valley in which nobody dares to go, for wild creatures and evil plant life roam about.

Peach: Oh, no!

Blue: Ah, don't worry. You've got some weapons in your supplies.

Spiny: ... All we have are a bunch of baseball bats!

Blue: Exactly!

Cheep Cheep: Ahem! Some of us can't hold weapons!

Blue: Ah, put 'em in yer mouth or something.

Goomba: Isn't that unsanitary?

Blue: Just... be quiet so I can talk. Anyway, you'll be in Bianco Valley for a total of 39 grueling, painful, and possibly humorous days.

Daisy: HUMOROUS?!

Blue: For the viewers at home, that is.

Yoshi: Viewers at home? Yoshi no understand.

Blue: Well, yeah! We've got some cameramen right here!

Blue points to Morton and Ludwig, who are manning the cameras.

Morton: Hi, Mom!

Toad: Doesn't the concept of cameras completely destroy the purpose of this being a reality show?

Blue: No, it happens all the time. Look at other shows, like Survivor!

Lakitu: What's Survivor?

Blue: ... You won't get it. It's an Earth thing.

Lakitu: What's Earth?

Blue Virus, Host with the Most: This guy's not gonna last more than three days, I assure you.

Mario: So, where's the campsites?

Blue: Do you have the maps?

Mario: Yeah, right in my pocket.

Blue: And do you guys have your map?

Goomba: Got it.

Blue: Very well! Just follow these directions to your campsites. Food and water and stuff'll be there, cuz I'm a nice person.

Wario: Then why'd you try to kill us on the plane?

Blue: Oh, come on! It wouldn't have hurt anybody!

Wario: Um... it was an explosion. Explosions hurt.

Blue: So? Do I really care about the health of the contestants?

Koopa: OH GOD WE'RE GONNA DIE OF DYSENTERY OR MALARIA OR WHATEVER AAAAAA-

Blue: Relax! I've got first aid by a good buddy of mine.

Blue points to Larry, who has a barrel full of medical supplies.

Larry: I'm on TV!

Blue: Nobody cares, Larry. Nobody cares.

Larry: Waaaah.

Blue: Now, off you go, into the vast unknown!

All: Make us!

Yellow and Red pull out shotguns.

Blue: Now will you go?

All: OKAY!

The masses leave, each in separate directions.

Blue: Gee, I hope they're all right out there.

Day 1-3, 16 players left
Day 1

Good Guys

Mario: Okay, guys. It says on this map that we take a right... here.

Toad: Mario? That's a field of thorned bushes.

Mario: So? Tough it out!

Toad: I guess...

Toad walks into the bushes and promptly jumps out.

Toad: I ALMOST DIED IN THERE!

Mario: Relax, it's just a cut.

Toad: Oh... okay.

Luigi: Well, we have no means of chopping it down.

Mario: And I can't shoot any fire at the moment.

Yoshi: Wait! Yoshi have idea!

Wario: Hoo, boy. Yoshi's got an idea.

Yoshi: Yoshi eat bushes!

Wario, Sneaky Scoundrel: Is eating the solution for everything to him?

Yoshi, Hungry Hungry Dino: Yes.

Yoshi tries to eat the bushes, but to no avail.

Yoshi: Owowowowowowww!

Waluigi: Wait, how about we use Wario's nasty breath to kill the bushes?

Daisy: That actually sounds like a plausible idea to me.

Wario belches on the bushes. The plants die, and I swear one of them said “It
buuuurns...”

Peach: It worked. I don't believe it.

Wario: Eh-heh! Wario wins again!

Baddie Brigade

Koopa: AH! I think a mosquito just bit me! I'm gonna get malaria!

Shy Guy, Masked Man: I don't think Koopa can take the wilderness. He's been vacationing for so long, I think he's scared of the wild.

Spiny: Relax, you idiot. That was only a tree branch.

Koopa: A TREE BRANCH?! That could have been carrying all sorts of disease!

Buzzy Beetle: Shut yer trap, we're almost there.

Goomba: Actually, according to the map, we've still got about a mile to go.

Koopa: Oh, no! I'm going to get corns on my feet from walking that long!

Spiny, Spiky Shell-Thing: I'm going to vote him off. Seriously, I will, just to end his suffering. And is it me, or am I the only intelligent one?

Cheep Cheep: Get a grip, Koopa! You're not going to die!

Koopa: Oh, you just say that. I'm going to die tomorrow! I just-

Shy Guy slaps Koopa in the face.

Bob-omb: Hey, look! There's a big ol' wall of vines in the way!

Goomba: Yeah, and that's the way to camp! We've gotta tear it down or something. Bob-omb, you go first.

Bob-omb blows up on the wall of vines. Nothing happens.

Bob-omb: Boy, these things are tough!

Spiny: Lemme try this out.

Spiny rams into the wall, but only succeeds in snipping a vine off the wall.

Spiny: Aw, come on!

Buzzy Beetle: How about I try chewing through the vines?

Buzzy Beetle actually succeeds in chomping through the vines, creating a hole big enough for all the mass to get through.

Goomba: Thanks, Buzzy!

Buzzy Beetle, Armored Arthropod: I think this'll help me out at the Mass Massacre!

Lakitu: I'm tired of walking!

Goomba: You don't walk.

Lakitu: My cloud's tired, though.

Goomba: Clouds can't get tired.

Lakitu: Oh, yes they can, see?

Lakitu's cloud is smiling.

Goomba: It's smiling.

Lakitu: They all smile!

Goomba, Minion of Minions: Smart-aleck.

Good Guys

Luigi: Hey, do you guys ever have the feeling somebody's watching you? Cuz I do.

Mario: There's a cameraman right behind us. Somebody is watching you.

Luigi: Oh.

Peach: Look! A fruit tree!

Peach points to a gigantic tree with a strange, blue fruit growing on it.

Yoshi: Yoshi no like looks of fruit. Look poisonous!

Peach: Oh, yeah? Well too bad, because I'm picking some!

Peach picks a fruit and takes a bite into it. She then holds her stomach.

Peach: GROSS! It tastes like sardines!

Wario: Ha ha ha!

Peach shoves the rest of the fruit into Wario's mouth.

Wario: MMPH MM- Hey, this stuff is tasty! Pick some more of it!

Waluigi, being the tallest, picks some more fruit and puts it in the supplies
Box (read: under Yoshi's saddle).

Toad: Shouldn't we get going?

Mario: Yeah! The sun looks like it's setting.

Daisy: Come on, guys!

The Good Guys head on until they come upon a large pit.

Mario: We gotta get over the pit!

Luigi: Why not just walk around it?

Mario: Look.

Surrounding the pit is a ring of Munchers.

Luigi: Oh.

Yoshi: Look, there vines we swing from!

Mario: Good! Peach, Daisy, you get over there first, you're the lightest. Waluigi and Luigi will go second, then Yoshi and Toad. Wario and I will cross last.

Peach, Distressed Princess: I think Mario's... changed a little since I've seen him last.

(All the mass members cross safely.)

Mario: Wow. How anti-climactic.

Suddenly, a gigantic Albatoss flies overhead, dropping huge Bob-ombs.

Luigi: RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!

Peach: Yaaaaaah!

Daisy: AAAAAH!

Toad: AAIIIEEE!

The mass members all run on the path, trying not to get blown up by the Bob-ombs. Eventually, they make it to their campsite, and the Albatoss flies away.

Mario: Well, that was certainly close. C'mon, guys, let's set up the campfire and eat.

Wario: Ooh! I get first dibs!

Yoshi: But then there be no food left.

Daisy: Well, I call first dibs then. Everybody knows that princesses don't eat much.

(Daisy grabs a chicken leg and tears a chunk of meat off.)

Daisy: Mmmmph... yum.

Peach: I get the salad!

Mario: Pasta for me-

Luigi: -and me!

Wario: I got my fish fruits here!

Waluigi: I'll just have some potatoes.

Toad: Anything but Mushrooms!

Yoshi: Nothing but Mushrooms!

Toad: O.o

Yoshi: How you say O.o?

Baddie Brigade

Buzzy Beetle: We've got this too easy. We've gone halfway to the camp without being ambushed by some large creature.

Spiny: Great, you've jinxed us!

Buzzy Beetle: What do you mean?

An enormous Cobrat slithers out of the bushes.

Buzzy Beetle: OIC.

Koopa: WE'RE DEAD!

Goomba: No we're not! We can fight this thing and eat it later!

Lakitu: But I'm a vegetarian.

Goomba: You were eating a ham sandwich on the plane.

Lakitu: Is ham meat?

Goomba, Minion of Minions: I hate this guy already.

Cobrat: Hisssssss... you look scrumptiousssss! You'd all make a great sssssupper!

Bob-omb: Don't worry, guys! Bob-omb to the rescue!

The Cobrat eats Bob-omb.

Goomba: Aw, darn.

Suddenly, Bob-omb blows up inside the Cobrat, sending him out of its stomach. The Cobrat whimpers and slithers away.

Spiny: Woah. Cool.

Buzzy Beetle: Thanks, Bob-omb!

Bob-omb: You're welcome!

Buzzy Beetle: Now let's just hope nothing bad happens.

Spiny: Oh, come on!

A giant Ostro appears from behind them, running quickly.

Goomba: Quick! Everybody hop on the Ostro as it comes by!

Koopa: I don't know, it might have lice!

Spiny: Shut up.

As the Ostro passes, all the mass members hop on. Strangely enough, they
get carried to their campsite, where the Ostro drops them off.

Goomba: How the- aw, never mind. Let's just eat, guys.

All: Agreed!

Koopa: As long as it's not anything dairy, I'm lactose intolerant!

The mass members all eat a nice meal of canned peaches.

Goomba: Ah, that was good. How about we hit the hay for tonight?

All: Yep!

Koopa: WAIT! Do we have to sleep on the ground?

Goomba: No. You can sleep in the trees with the snakes and bugs if you want!

Koopa: On second thought, the ground does look soft...

Goomba, Minion of Minions: I seriously think Koopa's not ready for the wilderness.

Koopa, Shelled Soldier: I'm not ready for the wilderness!

Good Guys

Mario: Ah, that was a great meal, guys!

Wario: I'm-a stuffed!

Yoshi: Hard to believe Wario full!

Peach: How about we go to bed? All that food made me tired.

Toad: Yeah, I'm going to bed as well.

Mario: Okay, we'll all get to bed. Good night, everyone!

All: Goodnight!

Mario, Plump Plumber: It seems nobody's done anything to get them a negative vote. We'll see tomorrow, though.

Day 2

Good Guys

Waluigi: Ahh! Good morning, everyone!

Mario: Good morning. How did everybody sleep?

Luigi: I had to get up in the middle of the night, and it was scary!

Peach: The ground was too cold.

Daisy: The ground was too hard.

Wario: I was comfy!

Yoshi: Only 'cause you sleep on Yoshi!

Waluigi: I slept nice as well!

Toad: You used my HEAD as a pillow!

Waluigi: So?

Toad: Eh. You're right.

Mario: Listen, I think we should build some kind of shelter so we get protected from the elements.

Luigi: Yeah, I don't want to sleep in the rain!

Mario: So, we'll split up to get the supplies we'll need. Waluigi, Toad, you go get the wood for the shelter. Peach, Daisy, you two get some rations so we don't run out of food. Luigi, Wario, you'll be getting firewood for the fires. Yoshi and I will find water. Okay?

All: Yep!

Mario: Good, let's split up then.

Waluigi and Toad

Toad: This'll be easy! There are enough trees here for a million log cabins!

Waluigi: Oh, yeah? Well, we don't have anything to cut the trees down with.

Toad: ... Shoot. Well, is there anything sharp near us?

Waluigi: Well, there's that rock right there...

Toad: Sharper!

Waluigi: That Piranha Plant's teeth look sharp!

Toad: Good. You get it and use it like a chainsaw.

Waluigi: Why me?

Toad: You're less of a threat, you're good with plants.

Waluigi: Okay, then.

Peach and Daisy

Daisy: Did you find anything yet?

Peach: No, nothing...

Daisy: Ah, well. I'll go over here, you wait!

Peach: Okay!

Peach turns around and sees a big tree with sparkling red apples on it. She drools a bit before running up to the tree.)

Peach: Wow! An apple tree! ... But I can't let anybody know about it!

Daisy: Peach? What are you talking about?

Peach: Nothing! I just saw a pretty flower!

Daisy: Okay, then!

Peach: ... Sucker.

Wario and Luigi

Luigi: This is no use! Without an axe, we can’t chop the trees down!

Wario: Oh, yeah?

Wario bites the tree off.

Wario: Eh-heh!

Luigi: That's disgusting.

Mario and Yoshi

Yoshi: Look, Mario! Water!

Yoshi points to a stream with clear water in it. Fish are swimming around.

Mario: Wow! We got water and food!

Yoshi: How we carry it?

Mario: Quick, take this coconut and poke a hole in it. Dump the coconut milk ut and we can use these as canteens.

Yoshi: Okay!

Yoshi takes a rock and chips a hole in the coconut, like asked.

Mario: I feel we're off to a good start!

Baddie Brigade

Cheep Cheep: I'm hungry!

Goomba: Well, we just had breakfast.

Cheep Cheep: Do you honestly call a couple slices of bread breakfast?

Bob-omb: It was toast, so yes.

Cheep Cheep: Well, I'm still hungry!

Spiny: Go eat your foot.

Buzzy Beetle: HEY, GUYS! I FOUND FOOD!

Goomba: What kind?

Buzzy Beetle: I found all these blue fruits!

Cheep Cheep: Gimme!

Cheep Cheep eats the fruits, unaware they are fish fruits.

Cheep Cheep: ... YUM!

Goomba: Let me try one... blech! Tastes like... like... fish!

Cheep Cheep: O.O  FISH?!

Buzzy Beetle: Oh, and I found a stream with fish and sparkling water in it! And coconuts!

Goomba: Good job. Let's all get the food.

Cheep Cheep: NO! I ATE FISH!

Goomba: Relax, you're supposed to eat fish. Fish eat other fish.

Cheep Cheep: Oh.

Good Guys

Mario: Well, we have all the supplies we need for the shelter, so we should start building!

Wario: Okay, good.

Wario lies down on a nearby rock, sipping from a coconut.

Mario: Wario, aren't you helping?

Wario: No.

Luigi: Oh, come on! You're the strongest here!

Toad: What about me? I was the most powerful in SMB2!

Luigi: Yeah, whatever.

Toad: Oh, yeah? I'll show you! I'll build the whole shelter myself!

All: ...

Mario: Woah. Isn't that a bit extreme?

Toad: No way! You can all go away and do whatever, I'm building the shelter!

Waluigi: I can help-

Toad: NO!

Waluigi: ...

Baddie Brigade

Goomba: We've got food, water and shelter, thanks to Buzzy Beetle and Spiny. Lakitu fished, so we have enough food to last us a while. Koopa, why didn't you help?

Koopa: You don't know what bacteria and viruses are in these fish! And I might get dysentery from the water! And I don't like coconut!

Bob-omb: So?! You could have at least helped by carrying the stuff back to camp!

Koopa: And risk getting my hands covered in germs? No way!

Buzzy Beetle: Sheesh... Come on, guys, let's start building the shelter.

Koopa: Oh, fine. I can't get hurt this way.

Spiny: Good! Let's get to work!

One hour later...

Goomba: Ah, we're finally finished!

Buzzy Beetle: It's beautiful!

All the shelter is, is a large hut made of bamboo.

Koopa: Are you sure there aren't any bugs in there?

Goomba: Yes.

Koopa: Really?

All: YES!

Koopa: Okay... as long as I don't have to sleep on the ground.

Bob-omb, Explosive Extraordinaire: Geez, it's like the guy's living in a plastic bubble.

Goomba: Listen, how about we get to sleep?

Lakitu: Okay!

Goomba: ... You don't talk much, do you?

Lakitu: Because yes YAY!

Goomba: And I see why.

Lakitu: YAAAAY!

Buzzy Beetle: Why don't we sleep? It'll help us tomorrow when we do the immunity challenge.

Koopa: Yeah.

Spiny: Okay.

Cheep Cheep: Yup.

Lakitu: Because yes YAY!

Good Guys

Toad: I'm done the shelter, guys!

Toad presents an immaculate shelter, complete with a kitchen and a bedroom.

Mario: Amazing!

Toad: It may have taken about ten hours, but I finished!

Wario: Let's-a go! To sleep!

Mario; Yeah, let's.

Day 3

Good Guys

???: WAKE UP!

All: AAH!

??? reveals himself to be Red.

Red: Listen, there's an immunity challenge in a few minutes, so listen up!

You're gonna need an iron gut
To kick the other mass' butt,
For you will need to eat a lot
Some things you'll like, some things you'll not!

And that's all she wrote.

Mario: An eating contest... oh joy.

Wario: Woo! Food!

Peach: Ech... Count me out!

Mario: You can't, or we'll lose!

Peach: But I don't WANNA!

Mario: I-

Peach: I DON'T WANNA I DON'T WANNA I DON'T WANNA!

Yoshi: Yoshi fill in for Peach!

Mario: Oh, boy. We're doomed.

Baddie Brigade

Lakitu: Burp!

Spiny: GAH!

Buzzy Beetle: Umm... There's somebody over there...

Koopa: WHO?! Is it a savage?

???: Relax! It's just me, Yellow.

Goomba: Oh. Why are you here?

Yellow: I got sent here by Blue. I need to tell you about today's challenge.

You're gonna need an iron gut
To kick the other mass' butt,
For you will need to eat a lot
Some things you'll like, some things you'll not!

Yep. That's it.

Goomba: So, we're gonna have to eat nasty stuff?

Yellow: That's the size of it.

Koopa: AAAAAAAA-

Yellow slaps Koopa and poofs away.

Bob-omb: Oh, boy! I love these kind of contests!

Spiny: Do you have a feeling the host likes that competition?

Cheep Cheep: As long as it ain't anything gross, I'm in.

Spiny: That's the point.

Cheep Cheep: Dang.

Immunity Challenge

The Good Guys and the Baddie Brigade are poofed to the immunity challenge.

Mario: How did that happen?

Blue: Using MAGIK!!!!11!1!

All: ...

Blue: Anyway, you all should know the rules, seeing as you two did your jobs, hm?

Yellow and Red: Yes sir!

Blue: Very good. Now, in case you forgot, you'll all have to be eating some pretty nasty stuff. This big ol' wheel right here will say what you eat when you spin it. Be thankful if it lands on something like chocolate, for that's a preeeeety slim chance. Are we ready?

All: Yep.

Blue: Good. Mario? You spin first.

Mario spins the wheel.

Blue: Mmm-MMM! Paratroopa feathers!

Mario: Oh, blech!

Mario tries one, and he finds it surprisingly tasty.

Mario: Hey, not bad!

Blue: Goomba, you next.

Goomba spins the wheel.

Blue: Looks like you're eating Spiny Egg Soup!

(Goomba manages to guzzle down every last spiky drop.

Goomba: Eww... That hurt.

Blue: Luigi? You're up.

Luigi spins the wheel.

Blue: Ooh! A yummy Pidgit beak!

Luigi eats the beak. It is horrible, judging from his facial expression.

Luigi: Blaaaaah...

Blue: Koopa? You're up!

Koopa spins the wheel.

Blue: ... Gee, looks like you lucked out! You get a glass of cola!

Koopa drinks the cola. It's cherry!

Koopa: Yay!

Blue: Peach? You're up.

Peach spins the wheel.

Blue: A Fish Fruit!

Peach: Not these again!

Peach manages to eat the whole thing before running to the bushes.

Peach: Blech! Gross!

Blue: Buzzy, your turn.

Buzzy Beetle spins the wheel.

Blue: A nice, cold glass of swamp water!

Buzzy Beetle drinks the water. He then grimaces as his face turns green.

Buzzy Beetle: Aw, MAN that is nasty!

Blue: Daisy! Your turn!

Daisy spins the wheel.

Blue: Ah, the old "Mushroom Surprise"!

Daisy chokes down the Mushroom Surprise, which is a disgusting mixture of Mushroom, relish, and dog food.)

Daisy: GROSS!

Blue: Lakitu, you're next.

Lakitu spins the wheel.

Blue: Mmmm! Cricket pie!

Lakitu gobbles down the pie.

Lakitu: Yummy!

Blue: Woah. Wario, you're up.

Wario spins the wheel.

Blue: Boiled Buzzy Beetle!

Wario slurps up the Beetle with no problem.

Buzzy Beetle: O.O

Wario: Ooh, delish!

Blue: Spiny, your turn.

Spiny spins the wheel.

Blue: Pasta marinara!

Spiny wolfs down the pasta.

Spiny: ^_^

Blue: Waluigi! Next!

Waluigi spins the wheel.

Blue: A Snifit's bullet!

Waluigi: No way, man! I quit!

Blue: Then it looks like Baddie Brigade wins immunity!

Baddie Brigade: Woohoo!

Good Guys: Awww...

Blue: Well, Baddie Brigade, get back to your camp. As for you, Good Guys, come with me.

The Baddie Brigade leaves. Blue walks up to a warp pipe.

Blue: Hop in.

The Good Guys do as instructed.

Mass Massacre

The Good Guys end up on top of a cliff, each holding a lit staff. Blue walks up to them.

Blue: Well, it's your first Mass Massacre. How's it been?

Mario: Okay.

Luigi: Could've been worse.

Peach: Horrible!

Daisy: Fine!

Wario: Wonderful!

Waluigi: Ech.

Yoshi: Yoshi!

Toad: Okay, I guess.

Blue: Okay, then! Time to vote. Everybody will come up to this pot and put their vote in there. Their votes will be written on a slip of paper. Now, let's vote.

Mario walks up to vote.

Mario: You cost us the match, so I'm going to have to vote you off.

Luigi goes up to vote.

Luigi: You're too much of a threat, sorry.

Peach goes up to vote.

Daisy goes up to vote.

Wario goes up to vote.

Wario: I'm getting rid of you now so we don't have to contend with you later.

Waluigi goes up to vote.

Yoshi goes up to vote.

Yoshi: Sorry, but you too much competition.

Toad goes up to vote.

Blue: Okay! All the votes have been cast, so now it's time to tally them up.

Blue walks up to the pot.

Blue: The first vote is for... Waluigi.

Waluigi: Wah!

Blue: The second vote is for... Mario.

Mario: WHAT?

Blue: The third vote is for... Wario.

Wario: Eh?

Blue: The fourth vote is for... Peach.

Peach: NO!

Blue: The fifth vote is for... Peach.

Peach: NOOO!

Blue: The sixth vote is for... Peach.

Peach: THIS CAN'T BE!

Blue: The seventh vote is for... Waluigi.

Waluigi: Oh, no!

Blue: The last vote is for... Peach.

Peach: NO NO NOOOO!

Blue: Sorry, Peach, but you'll have to give me your staff.

Blue puts out the fire on Peach's staff.

Blue: In Survivor, fire means life. Your life here is no more. HOWEVER, I will let you crack your staff on the head of who you think is responsible.

Peach whacks Daisy with her staff.

Daisy: OW!

Blue: Peach, please come with me into this pipe.

Peach warps away, into Isle Delfino's Sirena Hotel.

Blue: Oh, and you may go back to camp through the other warp pipe. See you tomorrow!

The other Good Guys go back to camp.

Peach, Distressed Princess, on being voted off: THIS ISN'T FAIR! I didn't do anything wrong, so why did they vote me off? That Wario should have been voted off!

Who voted for who?

Mario: Waluigi - Cost them the match
Luigi: Waluigi - Too much of a threat
Peach: Wario - Stinky
Daisy: Peach - Too whiny
Wario: Peach - Didn't want to put up with her
Waluigi: Peach - Unwilling to compete in immunity challenge
Yoshi: Peach - Too much competition
Toad: X - Vote goes to Mario

To Be Continued...

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