Maguskoopa: Welcome, one and all, to the very last chapter of ONCE AND FOR ALL! Our final winner is:
JOSHUA! GOOD JOB, JOSHUA! THANKS FOR YOUR HELP!
Maguskoopa: I just want to thank everyone who voted Once and For All into LLL. But now, let’s begin… To start, everyone who isn’t a Koopaling, go home.
Fawful: WHA?!
Glurp: GLURP!
Maguskoopa: The final battle shall take place between Koopalings only. It is called…
FIGHT FOR THE TROPHY!
Maguskoopa: As you can see, we are in lovely Neon Heights, in front of the largest skyscraper on Plit. On the roof, I have placed a trophy. When someone touches it, a timer starts going down. Whoever is in possession of the trophy when the timer stops wins!
Larry: It still isn’t fair!
Maguskoopa: Why?
Larry: Because per your scoring system, Iggy will win no matter what!
Maguskoopa: I was getting there. You see, the winner of this round gets 10 points…
Koopalings: Oooooooooooo…
Maguskoopa: And everyone else gets nothing! Zero! Nada! Zip! Zilch!
Iggy: WHAT?! NO!
Maguskoopa: I hope to see how you do in the final round. Who will take home the trophy? Let’s find out.
The teams leave.
Maguskoopa: Ready… set…
…
…
Maguskoopa: GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!
Ludwig creates a warp pipe and hops in. Wendy takes control of the big fountain out front and starts rocketing up the building. The rest of the Koopalings go in through the sliding doors and go up various stairs and elevators.
Wendy: HA! At this rate, I’ll be queen in no time!
Voice: I wouldn’t say that.
Wendy: Huh?
BAM! Wendy is hit from the side with a warp pipe and falls to the ground. Ludwig sticks his head out of the warp pipe.
Ludwig: Never say things like tha– WAH!
Ludwig is shot with Lemmy’s Freeze Gun.
Lemmy: Better take the elevator next– GAH!
Lemmy is knocked into Ludwig by Roy.
Roy: HA–AUGH!!!
…
Roy: Phew, thought I was going to get hit, too.
Iggy: Surprise!
Roy: Why you–
POW! OOF! BOP! PUNCH! WHAP! WHAM!
Meanwhile…
Larry: AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
Morton: Atlasticanwinasiwillgettenpointsandyouwillhavenoneand
iammorepowerfulthanyouand–
KA–SOCK!
Morton: Mfff.
Larry: Wall of thorns!
Sha-WOOP! A huge wall made of thorns springs up from the ground, blocking Morton.
Morton: MF! MF!
FWAMM! Morton summons a fireball that burns down the barrier. However, by the time Morton can clamber through, Larry is nowhere to be seen. By this time, Ludwig has defrosted.
Ludwig: Think he can get away with it, can he? Let’s stop by the offices and see what we can make…
Meanwhile…
Roy: VERTICAL SUPLEX!
FA-WHAM!
Iggy: Ow…
Roy: Haf…haf…haf…
Lemmy: Freeze Gun!
Roy: Air Cushion!
Roy summons a shield made of air that reflects the Freeze Gun right back at Lemmy. He is frozen.
Roy: Ha! Time to get that trophy!
By this time, Wendy has reached the elevator.
Wendy: While all those losers fight over the common way up, I’ll be winning with style!
The elevator goes up for three stories before Ludwig remembers to cut the elevator cable. Wendy plummets down.
Wendy: …
Please note that the silence is due to Wendy’s scream transcending the spectrum and becoming quantum sound… Wait… it’s coming down.
Wendy: AAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
CRASH! Wendy is knocked unconscious, but isn’t seriously injured.
Ludwig: That should do it! Now, back to my project…
WHAM! Larry kicks the door down.
Ludwig: You’re not going anywhere.
Larry: Uh… uh…
Morton shows up in the doorframe.
Morton: Andthatisreasonnumberninehundredninetyninewhyidontlikeweddingcakeand
thereareonlyfivehundredfortythreebillionninehundredfiftymillion
threehundredtwentyfourthousand–
CLATCH! Beep… beep… beep… beep…
Larry: A… Motion Sensor Bomb?
Ludwig: You’d be surprised what you can do with chewing gum. Time to go to the top!
Ludwig opens the elevator shaft and starts climbing up the cable. The bomb, caught to Morton’s foot, starts ticking down.
Morton: Whatdowedowhatdowedowhatdowedo?!
Larry: I don’t know about you, but… IRONWOOD BARRIER!
SHAZAM!
Morton: Whyisthereawallinfrontofmeidontlikeitonebitwhatsgoingon
ibetthisisweddingcake’sfault–
Beep… beep… beeeeeeeeee!
Morton: Oh–
BOOM! CRASH! Morton is launched through the window and lands in the reflecting pool. Larry notices Ludwig, who by now is five stories above him.
Larry: I’ll cut him off at the pass!
Larry takes the stairs. Meanwhile, Lemmy defrosts and dashes up the sta–
BUMPABUMPABUMPABUMPABUMPABUMPABUMP!
Lemmy: Owie…
… I guess that it’s difficult to go up stairs while riding a ball. Meanwhile, Ludwig has reached the halfway point.
Ludwig: I’m not going to give up!
Suddenly, Roy bursts through the floor, grabs Ludwig’s foot, and throws him into a wall.
Roy: I’m tired of being mocked by Iggy!
Ludwig: I’m sorry to hear that.
Roy: STOP MOCKING ME! Roy Special!
BA-WHAM-CRACK!
Ludwig: Missed! Ha!
Ludwig runs up the stairs. Roy opens the elevator door and starts climbing up the cord.
Roy: I bet they’ll try to use the stairwell. Heh, they’ll never expect me.
However, this takes a long time, and in the meantime, Lemmy, Ludwig, and Larry have got all the way to the roof. A cold, dreary rain is pouring down on the helipad as the three competitors burst out of different stairways.
Larry: Finally! The roof! But where is…
Suddenly, a flash of lightning illuminates a ring of potted plants. In the middle is a huge, gleaming trophy.
Lemmy: MINE!
Ludwig: No way!
Lemmy starts firing Freeze Gun blasts at Ludwig. Larry, avoiding detection, sneaks over to the ring of plants.
Larry: They’ll never guess that I made some quick… arrangement to these flowers…
After digging up a few of the plants, Larry fumbles about in his shell and pulls out a packet of seeds. He plants them and, with a wave of his wand, they grow into identical plants immediately.
Larry: Now, I’ll just wait for them to finish fighting.
Lemmy: All right, you asked for it. Summon Freezie!
A huge Freezie plummets from the sky, aiming towards Ludwig. Ludwig kicks the Freezie toward Roy, who pounded through the elevator doors.
Roy: Oh, no you don’t!
Roy dodges and the Freezie slams into the ground.
Roy: That was weak! I’ll show you real power!
Roy starts running at Lemmy, who stands there.
Roy: What’s the matter? Paralyzed with fright?
Lemmy: No, you forgot what happens to Freezies when they’re out too long.
Roy: Why, what happens to Freezies when they’re out too long?
Suddenly, the Freezie melts into the ground, causing the entire helipad to turn to ice. Roy skids on the ice and smashes into the potted plants. Some of the plants uproot themselves and jump on Roy.
Roy: IT’S AN M. BUSH! LARRY! I’LL GET YOU FOR THIIIIIIIIIIIS!
As Roy is pounded by the M. Bushes, Larry grabs the trophy…
Larry: YEAH!
…and attempts to move, but doesn’t.
Larry: Um, what happened?
I was getting to that. Larry’s feet are apparently frozen to the ground. Lemmy rolls over to the trapped Koopaling and snatches the trophy.
Lemmy: Ha!
4:30… 4:29… 4:28…
Lemmy: Now to hide!
Lemmy dashes down a few floors and locks himself in a broom closet. Meanwhile, Iggy has recovered from his injuries and has reached the roof at the same time as Wendy, who had regained consciousness. Morton, by the way, cannot swim, and is currently flailing around in the decorative fountain.
Iggy: Now for that trophy!
Wendy: Oh yeah? You’re not getting by me!
Iggy: We’ll see about that! GIANT SIZE!
Iggy grows to the size of something very large. However, the building cannot support him, and he smashes half the skyscraper, knocking Lemmy off the premises, still holding the trophy.
Iggy: That was the trophy! You’re mine!
Wendy: Grasping Water!
A huge hand forms out of the decorative fountain and grabs Iggy by the foot. He falls over and reverts to normal size. While this happens, Morton manages to climb out of the pool and assume chase against Lemmy.
Morton: Andwhenicatchyouiwillbeatyouupandtakethetrophyandiwillwin.
Lemmy: That’s kind of a short sentence for you.
3:00… 2:59… 2:58…
Morton: Wellyouaskedforitfireball!
Fizzle!
Morton: Ohnonottherainihateitihatethisstupidrainitsalmostasbadasweddingcakeand
idontlikeweddingcakebecause–
Wendy: Aqua Sock!
KA–SOCK!
Morton: Glub.
Lemmy: I always knew it would come down to us.
Wendy: What a compliment! I’m touched, rea–
ZORT! Wendy is frozen.
Lemmy: Ha! I actually thought it would come down between me and Ludwig.
Ludwig: It has.
Lemmy: Woah! How’d you get here?
Ludwig: Warp pipe. Whad did you think?
Suddenly, something bites Lemmy hard on the hand. He flinches and drops the trophy.
Lemmy: A flea?! How’d I get a flea on my arm?
Ludwig: Why do you sound so incredulous?
Lemmy: Hey, these metal bands aren’t just for style, you know.
Suddenly, Iggy appears out of nowhere, grabs the trophy, and runs away.
Lemmy: HEY! That must have been him!
1:37… 1:36… 1:35…
Meanwhile, on the half-destroyed skyscraper…
Roy: ARGH! I’ve had enough! Whirling Fortress!
Roy withdraws into his shell and spins around, flinging the M. Bushes everywhere.
Roy: I’m too far away… Wait, all is not lost. Think, think… What would Ludwig do?
Watt is launched over Roy’s head.
Watt: AND IF I EVER GET MY HANDS ON THAT CHUCKSTER, I’LL POUND HIM INTO THE GROUND!
Roy: AHA!
Roy jumps off of the building. Meanwhile…
Lemmy: AFTER HIM!
Lemmy and Ludwig chase after Iggy, but Ludwig can’t keep up due to his girth. He quickly falls behind. Lemmy continues to follow, firing Freeze Gun blasts at Iggy.
Lemmy: Stop, you!
Iggy: Never!
Iggy throws the trophy over a high fence, then clambers over it himself. Lemmy can’t even begin to ascend.
Lemmy: I’LL GET YOU! YOU HEAR ME?! I’LL GET YOU!
Iggy: No way. After I become king, I’m imprisoning everyone that was born before me!
Meanwhile…
Roy: Maybe this was a bad idea.
Roy is continuing to fall from the skyscraper, with about thirty stories remaining.
Roy: I mean, this is taking forever… Ah! Finally!
EEEEEEEEeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee…
Roy: ROY SEISMIC SLAM!
WHAM!!!
Iggy: Waugh! Wack! NO!
The trophy is jostled free from Iggy’s hand when Roy hits the ground. It rolls around and falls into a warp pipe.
0:30… 0:29… 0:28…
Iggy: I won’t let anything stand in my way!
The warp pipe recedes into the ground. A hologram appears.
Ludwig: You do not have a choice, Little Brother. Please enjoy a futile 25 seconds.
Iggy: ARGH!
0:10… 0:09… 0:08…
Ludwig: Hah! Now nothing can go– no. No. NO NO NO NO NO! WHY DID I HAVE TO SAY THAT?! WHY?! WHY–
BAM!
Ludwig: Ow.
Roy: I thought I heard someone down there.
Roy steals the trophy.
0:04… 0:03… 0:02…
Roy: I DID IT! I…
0:01…
ROY: -AM THE CHAMPION!!!
Beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!
Maguskoopa: AND ROY IS THE WINNER!
Roy: YES! I DID IT!
Maguskoopa: Let’s check the final standings now!
Team Larry: 18
points
Team Morton:
19 points
Team Wendy: 23
points
Team Iggy: 33
points
Team Roy:
36 points
Team Lemmy: 26
points
Team Ludwig:
24 points
Maguskoopa: Which means… ROY IS THE HEIR TO THE THRONE!!!
Roy: Yes! Despotic, militaristic nation, here I come!
Bowser: That’s my boy. Maguskoopa, I think this contest was good and fair.
Maguskoopa: Oh, sorry.
Bowser: Don’t worry, everyone makes mistakes. Here’s your fee.
Bowser hands Maguskoopa a button. Maguskoopa presses it. In another parallel universe…
Guy: I AM THE CHOSEN DRAGON WIELDER!
Pop!
Guy: Who are you?
Evil Guy: I’m the main villain. I could wait until you gain experience, but I decided to waste you right now.
POW! BIFF! WHAM! WHOP! OUCH!
Back with Maguskoopa…
Maguskoopa: And now, Team Roy… Iron Cleft… Roy… Rawk Hawk… Biff Atlas… Here are 987,654,321 coins! Enjoy them!
Iron Cleft: ALL RIGHT! SWEET!
Rawk Hawk: This’ll be enough for my feather wax for the rest of my life!
Biff Atlas: I always thought we needed more exercise equipment at the mansion, anyways!
Roy: SPORTS HALL RENOVATIONS!
Maguskoopa: I hope to see you all again! A big thanks to everyone who wrote in! See you again sometime!
The End
| If you would like to send some feedback
to the author of this submission, please complete this form.
What's your name?
What's your Email address?
How do you rate this submission?
Does this submission belong in Little
Lemmy's Land?
Would you like to see more from this author? Comments and suggestions:
|
