Blooey: The Legendary Blooper

By Paperlemmy

Chapter 1: The Path Ahead

Many years have passed since the stranger came upon that Blooper Baby, named Blooey, and gave him his special powers for him to awaken. As Blooey grew, he was accepted by many who called him a grand Blooper, and wouldn’t hesitate to help others in need. And yet he showed no interest in exceeding expectations or growing stronger. As a result, most of his true hidden powers remained untapped.

However, as time went by, that changed. He soon began to discover special abilities that no other Blooper had. He was able to propel himself in many directions as incredible speeds, for a Blooper, that is. He impressed many people with his amazing feats. One day, he reached the point where he felt too sheltered by his hometown on the coast of Blooper Bay. He decided to set out on a journey, to explore the world, and find the excitement he had been hoping for.

With a long goodbye from his family and friends he set out to see the world, first stopping near the Rumblebump Volcano, located in the Waffle Kingdom, where he met Luigi. At first, they did not get along too well; Luigi accidentally threw him into a lava pit, resulting in Blooey getting burned to a lovely shade of golden brown. He was so angry that he claimed he would never forgive him, and if it took him his whole life, he would make sure he paid for what he did. But as time went on, that changed. He saw the many sides of his new companion, and decided he wasn’t so bad after all, though he was still very sore towards him.

Finally, when they faced the dreaded Chestnut King, something came over him. He saw his friend, Luigi, in danger of being burned to a crisp. At the sight of this, without even thinking, Blooey jumped right in the way of the blast. He was burning all over, and yet, he did not feel pain. He felt exhilarated, full of energy! He felt that THIS was the reason why he left home: to find the excitement he had hoped for! When the battle was all over, Blooey was not so burnt; he wasn’t even fit to eat. Luigi felt really bad, but Blooey simply laughed, and told him to forget about it. Luigi was very surprised by this, but at the same time relieved that he did not have to face Blooey’s wrath anymore.

When Luigi’s journey had come to a close, Blooey felt it was about time he returned home. Bidding farewell to his good friend Luigi, Blooey shortly arrived home, much to the horror of his friends and family when they saw the state of him. Blooey endured months of hospitalization, recovering from his journey. But everyday, his family would drop by and give him comfort. After Blooey was finally released from the hospital, he used this time to spend with his family. Though he still wore his bandages, as he had not yet fully recovered, he enjoyed the time he spent with them. Little did he know that he would soon be leaving them again…

One particularly sunny day, Blooey, his sister Cootie, and his two good friends Bill the Cheep Cheep and Joey the Yoshi, were playing down by the beach. Bill was burying Joey in the sand, while Cootie was chasing Blooey across the sand. Cootie finally caught up with Blooey and toppled over him. They both laughed together.

“Blooey, you’re the world’s best brother!” Cootie said, getting up.

“Aww, thanks, Sis,” said Blooey in reply. “That means a lot coming from you.”

“No, really, I mean it. I wouldn’t trade you for any other brother in the world!”

“Neither would I trade any other sister in the world for you.”

“Hehe! Thanks, Blooey. I love you!”

“Hey, Blooey, Cootie!” called Bill from across the beach. “Come help me bury Joey in the sand!”

“Okay, coming!” Cootie cried.

“I really don’t see what’s so special about being buried in the sand,” said Blooey, more to himself then anyone.

“C’mon, Blooey, it’ll be fun!”

“You go on ahead, I’ll catch up.”

“Okay!”

Cootie ran off to join Bill and Joey. Blooey sat back and watched them playing. He felt great to be back home with his friends and sister. It felt great to be back playing with them again. He couldn’t think of a more perfect day…

A stranger appeared beside him without him noticing. “That’s a pretty sweet sister you have there,” the stranger said, looking at them.

“Yeah, I know,” replied Blooey without looking, without thinking about whom he was talking to.

“And those are some friends you have.”

“Yeah, they’re cool, too.”

“You’re pretty lucky to have them.”

“Yeah, I’m practically the luckiest guy in the world…”

There was a moment of silence between them, before Blooey finally snapped out of his dazed state.

“Wait a minute, who-“

But as he turned, he saw no one there. Confused, he turned back around, only to find the stranger standing right in front of him.

“WAH! What’s the big idea?!” yelled Blooey. His friends didn’t turn around; in fact, they seemed to be completely oblivious to what was happening with him and the stranger.

“Hmm? Nothing. Just came to see how you’re doing.”

“Came to see how… Who are you?!”

“Who am I? Why, don’t you remember me?”

“Uhh, I think I’d remember someone like you.”

Blooey took note of the stranger’s appearance. He was wearing a strange crooked, yellow hat that covered his face completely, blue robes and a split cape, brown striped pants, shoes, and gloves, and had a hooked staff. Blooey found this attire very strange, as it was blazing hot out.

“Come now, you must have seen me SOMEWHERE before.”

Blooey thought about where he might have seen him.

“Wait…” Blooey said at last. “You… you’re…”

“Yes?”

“You were… that Black Mage that played basketball with Luigi!”

The stranger nearly fell over at this. He found his balance, though, and stood up looking slightly flustered.

“Yeah, I remember now,” Blooey continued as though nothing had happened. “You were playing against Luigi and his friends. I saw it on TV while I was in the hospital!”

“Yes…” the “Black Mage” said through gritted teeth. “That was I! But I’ve met you before somewhere else!”

“What? No way, where?”

“Back, when you were still just a baby! Remember?”

“A baby?! I hardly remember anything back then!”

“Just think! The encounter IS buried within your memory! THINK!”

“Okay, okay, geez!”

Blooey closed his eyes, though he wasn’t really concentrating; instead, he was thinking to himself.

“Who is this guy? Why is he questioning me like this? As if I have anything to do with him! Some strange weirdo with that stupid hat and dumb blue clothes and that funny looking… staff?”

And then it hit him! It was suddenly very clear to him! This was the stranger that had zapped him as a baby, the one that had caught him while he was swimming home! It was this man!

“You’re that guy that zapped me…” Blooey said aloud, at last.

“NOW you remember!” replied the Black Mage, and there was a certain bit of satisfaction in his voice.

“Why did you do that? What was that for?  And just who are you?”

“I can’t answer all your questions now, but I will tell you my name. Bartholomew Magus, but you can call me BM for short.”

Blooey stared for a moment, then snickered. He was trying hard to suppress laughter.

“What’s so funny?” said BM, beginning to get annoyed again.

“Oh, nothing, nothing,” Blooey said, maintaining a straight face. “So, you came here to check up on me?”

“Yes. I had heard what happened to you over in the Waffle Kingdom. You’ve been through many struggles over there. Sure, Luigi seems to be taking most of the credit, but I’ve heard people talk about you, Blooey.”

“Hey, how’d you know my name?”

“I know a lot about you. I’ve been keeping an eye on you for the past few years, and I’ve heard many great things about you!”

“Oh, gee, I’m not THAT great.”

“Oh come now, don’t be so modest. I’ve heard the names they’ve called you. The ‘white torpedo’, the ‘Super Blooper’, the ‘Squid Wonder’...”

“’Squid Wonder’? That’s a new one. Err, I mean-“

“Aha! See, you admit it! You ARE great in your own right. You have proven to be no ordinary Blooper! But there is a reason for that.”

“A… reason?”

The moment seemed to change completely. He completely forgot his sister and friends were there. He could clearly tell that BM was here for something extremely important. He began to listen,intently.

“Yes. You see, my dear Blooey, you are more then just a great Blooper; you are the Blooper of Legend, the Legendary Blooper as told by the sages. It is you that is destined to save-“

BM pointed toward the Cheep Cheep Sea beyond the beach.

“-that.”

“… The sea?” replied Blooey.

“Yes, but not just that sea, all seas. Indeed, all the water in existence!”

“I don’t understand.”

“Well, I can’t explain it fully, myself. To find out more, we must journey to the Ocean Sage, Ozean. There, you will learn your destiny.”

“… Wait, you’re telling me to come with you to some strange old guy-“

“Actually, Ozean is a wise and very beautiful enchantress that knows many things about the sea. Although she IS old, she doesn’t look it!”

“That’s not the point I’m trying to make here! You’re saying I have to leave, right? I just got back! I don’t want to leave!”

“I thought you’d say that. So, let me give you a choice: you can come with me, or you can stay here. If you come with me, then you’ll find out all you need to know. If you stay, you might enjoy the presence of your family and friends now, but you might just be endangering their future.”

“What do you...?”

“As I had said before, the existence of all the water in this world is in danger. And with no water, life cannot be supported. Which means many people will suffer, including your family and friends… and sister.”

Blooey stared at BM, who merely stared back. Blooey looked around him and saw his sister, Cootie, playing with Bill and Joey in the sand. Blooey did not want to endanger her life, or any of theirs. He knew what he had to do.

“Okay,” Blooey said facing BM again. “I’ll go with you, but on one condition.”

“Name it,” replied BM.

“I want to tell my parents first; they’d be concerned if I didn’t tell them where I was going.”

“Very well, but make it quick.”

Blooey went off to his home, with BM following him. BM attracted many strange looks from the inhabitants, but BM did not mind at all. Blooey continued until he reached his home. His mother and father were sitting outside, his mother knitting a blanket for Cootie, and his father reading the newspaper, which read “Temperatures increase to record-breaking heights!”

“Mom, Dad,” Blooey said, rather awkwardly. It felt weird saying he had to go so soon, especially with someone as weird-looking as BM. “I’m going to be going away for a while, to find out my destiny.”

“Okay, hon,” Blooey's mother replied calmly.

Blooey was stunned, but only for a second.

“Uh, I don’t know when I’ll be back, though I’m sure it will only be for a moment.”

“Okay, Son,” Blooey's father replied, without looking up, as he turned the page of his newspaper.

Blooey couldn’t take it anymore.

“MOM, DAD, I’M GOING AWAY AGAIN!” he shouted with unnecessary force. “Doesn’t that bother you?”

“Oh Blooey,” his mother said, looking up at him; Blooey’s father was looking up at him, too. “You always were an adventurer. I’m sure I couldn’t stop you from going even if I wanted you to stay. I’m sure whatever this is must be important.”

“Yes, Son. Your mother and I love you, but we also know you like the back of our tentacles. You’re always protecting others and making sure they’re safe, so I’m sure that wherever you’re going, it’s for the best.”

Blooey couldn’t believe what he was hearing. He did not expect this.

“Uhh, okay, thanks,” Blooey said awkwardly. He walked over to BM and they began leaving together.

“Goodbye, Son. Have a safe trip,” Blooey’s father said, waving.

“Oh, and be sure you have a present ready for tomorrow night!” Blooey’s mother added.

Blooey stopped dead in his tracks. “… Tomorrow night?” He turned and faced his parents, who looked at him, confused.

“… For your sister’s birthday, of course,” Blooey’s mother added once more.

Blooey felt like he'd been hit by a ton of bricks. He'd completely forgot his sister’s birthday!

“Mother…” Blooey began; the words came out of his strangely. “I… I can’t…”

“WHAT?!”

Blooey’s mother and father acted with absolute outrage. The got up from their seats, marched over to Blooey, and loomed over him; Blooey felt absolutely feeble against them.

“So,” Blooey’s mother began in a rushed fury, “you finally decided to come back home, and now you march off on another adventure! The least we expect from you is getting your sweet younger sister a present for her birthday, but now you seem to be above that! Is that the case?”

“N-no, Mother!” Blooey said, though not with much confidence. “That’s not it at all-“

“Now listen, young man,” said his father, and Blooey felt himself shrink a few inches. “We know you’re the adventuring sort, but that doesn’t mean you can go forgetting about the ones you love! This is your sister’s sixth birthday, and she wanted you to be there!”

“I WILL!” Blooey spat out at last.

“You… will?” Blooey parents said, taken back a bit.

“Y-yeah, of course I will!” Blooey said, gaining confidence.

BM was shaking his head and waving his hands, and invisibly saying “No, no, don’t do it!” but Blooey ignored him.

“I never forget about my family. Cootie DESERVES to have the best sixth birthday a Blooper could ever have! I’ll be sure to be there, and I’ll be SURE to give her a great present!”

“Oh…” said Blooey’s mother, calming down. “Well, that’s good. Thank you, Blooey.”

“We’re sorry about the way we acted,” Blooey’s father said to him. “We’re just always worried about you, not just about your safety, but about how distant you’ve grown from us. We don’t want that to happen, Son.”

“Don’t worry, Dad,” Blooey said. “I’m never going to forget any of you. Ever.”

Blooey gave his parents a great big hug, and waved goodbye to them one more time. As he walked off with BM by his side, BM looked angrily at him.

“… What?” Blooey said in his defense. “What was I supposed to say?”

“I don’t know,” BM said, flustered. “But you can’t go making false promises like that!”

“But I-“

“You yourself said, you DON’T know when you’ll be back! While we might only have to see Ozean for a minute, we can’t waste any time on such trivialities!”

“It won’t take long. I’ll just drop by, give Cootie her present, and then we’ll be off!”

“You don’t understand!” BM was now really losing his temper. “I’m not the only one that knows of your existence! The one who plots against us, the one who threatens all the water in the world, knows of you, too! He won’t waste any time trying to find you and finish you off! And we won’t waste our time just going to some stupid birthday party for your sister!”

Blooey stared at BM coolly, while BM still had flames in his eyes.

“… I AM going,” Blooey said at last, with a very stern voice.

BM’s eyes widened.

“I don’t care what you, this Ozean person, or ANYONE thinks or says, I won’t let ANYTHING come in the way of my family! They are more important to me than anyone or anything in the entire world! So you listen to ME! No matter what you have planned for me ahead of time, it’s going to have to wait, because my sister deserves to have her big brother at her sixth birthday party! And if you don’t like it, then TOUGH!”

BM looked at Blooey deeply, but Blooey stood his ground. Then, at last, BM took a deep sigh.

“I didn’t expect for you to be so stubborn,” BM said to Blooey in a much calmer voice. “Very well. I obviously can’t force you to do something you don’t want to do.”

Even though Blooey did not appear to have a mouth on his face, one could tell by looking at him that he smiled. He was glad to see that BM understood him, and that he would actually make time for this.

“So,” BM added. “Have any more goodbyes you’d like to say? Perhaps to your sister?”

“No,” Blooey replied. “It was hard enough saying goodbye to my parents. I couldn’t stand the thought of having to go through the same thing with my sister…”

“All right, then. Let us be off.”

BM walked toward the coast, and Blooey followed. He was unsure of what he’d have to do or face at this point, but he knew that soon, he would be right back with his family again. And yet, he was in store for a lot more then he bargained for…

To Be Continued...

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