Mario and Parakarry: Zombie Hunters

By Blaze Koopa

In Twilight Land sat a huge mansion even bigger than Luigi's Mansion. Four Boos and two Dry Bones had just arrived there after parting from the huge group chasing Mario and Parakarry.

"Hurry, guys!" said a Boo. "We must tell him that Mario and his Parakoopa partner are on their way!"

They hurried into the mansion. After a long time of walking through the long hallways, they reached their leader's chamber. One Boo rang an old bell next to the huge, red chamber door.

"ENTER!!!" bellowed a voice.

They entered. They gazed up at a huge, dark figure - the leader - sitting on his throne.

"What is it?!" the leader asked.

"Your 'guests' are well on their way, sire," said a Boo.

"MHAHAHAHA!!! *ClumpClumpClump*" laughed the leader. "Excellent! ... Wait… Did you say… guests?"

"Um…yes," said the Boo.

"Hmm…" said the leader. "I only intended for Mario to come by himself… He has someone with him? *Clump*"

"*ClumpClumpClumpClumpClump*" said a Dry Bones.

"A blue-shelled Paratroopa, you say?" said the leader.

"Yes… with a gun…" answered another Boo.

"… Oh well," said the leader. "The more the better… Find them and bring them both to me. I have a little surprise for them! MHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! *ClumpClumpClump*"

Uh oh…


Mario and Parakarry were flying across the night sky after tangling with various Boos and Dry Bones zombies. As they flew, Mario began to grow more and more worried about Luigi as well as Parakarry. For Luigi, Mario wasn't so sure if he was still all right. All he could do was hope for the best. For Parakarry, his wing had been seriously pummeled. Mario could only hope that his wing would survive without further serious injury.

Parakarry was too nervous to think about much. He looked down at the ground far below. He could see almost nothing but leafless trees.

"Um… Mario," he said. "I think we're in Twilight Land."

Mario looked down at the dark trees far below. "I think you're right," he said.

Suddenly, a laser beam came from nowhere and hit Mario! Mario became dazed. When he recovered, he noticed he no longer had his cape!

"Parakarry…" he said, "prepare yourself for a rough landing!"

"Wha-" Parakarry was cut off when he found himself and Mario falling towards the ground!

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRGH!!!" screamed Parakarry. He landed with a hard THUD on his shell. PAIN!!!

Mario got up slowly and shook himself off. He looked over and saw Parakarry lying on his shell, wincing harder than ever. Mario ran over to him. "Parakarry!" he said.

"Oooooooooooowwww!" moaned Parakarry.

Mario sat him up and examined Parakarry's wing. It was still wrapped in the leaf, but cocked to the side a bit.

"Uh oh…" said Mario. "I think you twisted it…"

"Oh great…" muttered Parakarry. He slowly got up, his wing hurting badly. He winced again.

"Are you okay?" said Mario.

"I'm oka-" Parakarry paused. Mario had asked that question so many times that he couldn't take it anymore. "All right! I'm not okay!" he said. "I was never okay to begin with-" Parakarry put his hands to his beak, thinking he had probably said too much.

"You mean your wing hurt THAT bad?" asked Mario. "Or is it something else?"

"Something else?!" Parakarry gasped. "No! Really! It was… um…"

"Look!" interrupted Mario. "I've been watching you, and you seemed upset about something even when your wing WASN'T hurting… And I want to know what…"

"… Fine," said Parakarry, looking down. "I'll tell you… Well… It's kinda like… oh… How should I say this... Um-"

"Say it already!" said Mario, a little impatient. "We don't have much time…"

"Or no time at all!" said a voice.

Mario and Parakarry looked ahead to see several Boos, Dry Bones, and Huge Boos coming towards them!

"Is it just me," said Parakarry, "or has that group of Boos and Dry Bones gotten bigger?"

"I think the group got bigger," replied Mario.

"Oh… I was hoping it was just me…"

"Nice shot," said a Boo to a Dry Bones (which was obviously possessed by a Boo).

"*ClumpClumpClumpClump*" said the Dry Bones.

"So YOU'RE the one who shot us down…" said Mario.

"ENOUGH!!!" said a Huge Boo. "Just come on quietly and we promise not to hurt you!"

"Our leader would like to see you two," said a Boos with a snarl.

"An invitation?" said Parakarry. "Tempting, but we'll pass…"

"*ClumpClumpClumpClumpClumpClump*" said a Dry Bones.

"What'd he say?" asked Parakarry.

"He said We're afraid you have no choice!" said a Huge Boo.

"Who cares?!" said Mario. "Blast them, Parakarry!"

Parakarry jumped up and blasted at the Boos and Dry Bones, only hitting two Dry Bones. Some of the Boos charged at them, shooting lasers from their eyes. Parakarry jumped out of the way, still shooting. Mario ran towards the Huge Boos and, while dodging laser shots, began kicking them in the face one by one. The Huge Boos seemed to be unharmed, but Mario continued kicking nonetheless. Parakarry blasted two Boos, making them disappear, but was suddenly grabbed from behind by two Dry Bones. Mario noticed this. He jumped from the Huge Boo he was punching and jump-kicked one of the Dry Bones off Parakarry, smashing it to pieces. Parakarry shook the other zombie off and blasted it to pieces. He then picked up the Dry Bones's skull and chucked it at a Boo. The Boo disappeared before the skull even reached him. Mario charged at a Huge Boo and jump-kicked him in the face. The Boo roared in pain, then fired a laser beam at Mario, who jumped backwards to avoid it. The Huge Boo was suddenly blasted in the face by Parakarry, but to no avail. The shots bounced right off. A Boo shot a laser at Parakarry from behind, but it bounced off his shell and straight back into the Boo’s face, "poofing" him. Parakarry took no notice, his mind still on the Huge Boo. More Boos and Dry Bones surrounded Mario. They charged at him. Mario jumped over them, while the Boos and Dry Bones all slammed into each other. Parakarry continued to shoot at the Huge Boos, but it was no good.

"MHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!" laughed a Huge Boo. "Pathetic!" The Huge Boo blasted at Parakarry's hand. The Super Scope flew out of his hand and landed nine feet away. A Boo picked it up and aimed it at Parakarry. Now Parakarry was trapped and unarmed, with several Huge Boos, regular Boos, and Boo-possessed Dry Bones preparing to fire at him, their eyes glowing red!

"Um… Mario!" yelled Parakarry. "Little help here…" Mario heard the call. He punched away a Dry Bones and rushed towards a Huge Boo near Parakarry. He jumped onto the Huge Boo's head and covered its eyes.

"AAAAARGH!!!" cried the Huge Boo. "GET HIM OFF!!! GET… HIM… OFF!!!"

Two Dry Bones jumped onto the Huge Boo and tried to knock Mario off, but it was the other way around - Mario knocked the Dry Bones off. They landed hard on the ground, their bones flying apart upon impact. The other Boos also jumped onto the Huge Boo. They tried to get a hold on Mario, but Mario simply punched them off. All this gave Parakarry the opportunity to grab the Super Scope. The Dry Bones reassembled, but as fast as they did, Parakarry blasted them back to pieces. The Huge Boo disappeared, leaving Mario falling onto the ground. The other Huge Boos and regular Boos nearby also disappeared. Mario and Parakarry looked all around them nervously.

"W-w-w-w-where'd they all go?" asked Parakarry, getting an anime sweatdrop. Mario was silent. Suddenly, he heard a Boo cackling. He whipped around and punched something that seemed not to be there. Immediately after punching, a Boo appeared right where Mario's fist had stopped and flew backwards with his hands on his face.

"OOOOOWWW!!!" he yelped.

More cackling was heard. Parakarry whipped around and blasted, revealing three Boos that were about to attack him from behind. The Boos "poofed". Then there was more trouble. A laser beam suddenly came out of nowhere (literally) and hit Mario, knocking him unconscious!

"AAAHH!!! MARIO!!!" cried Parakarry. The Huge Boos (there were five of them) appeared in front of him. Now Parakarry was scared.

"Just stand still!" said a Huge Boo. "This won't hurt… much! MHAHAHAHAHA!!!"

Just then, Parakarry thought of something. Just as the Huge Boos were about to shoot him, Parakarry retreated into his shell and darted away, collecting the unconscious Mario on top of his shell and leaving the Huge Boos firing at nothing. The Huge Boos looked around, but Parakarry had taken Mario and was long gone.

"Huh!?" said a Huge Boo. "Where'd they go?!"


"Mario… Mario… Wake up, Mario…"

Mario's eyes twittered and slowly opened. He looked up, his vision blurry, to see a pair of wide open eyes staring at him through what appeared to be a pair of goggles. Behind them was something bright yellow in color, topped with something brown. Mario's vision cleared up, and he could see Parakarry leaning over him.

"… Parakarry?" Mario whispered. "What happened?"

"You got shot in the back," said Parakarry. "But don't worry. I took you and left those creeps in the dust… They're way far back there."

Mario sat up and rubbed the back of his head. "Hmm…" he said. "Where were we before those Boos and Dry Bones showed up? ... Oh yeah… About that something else."

"Err…" said Parakarry.

"Well," said Mario, "can't you explain?"

"Well… uh… that is… I… I… Aaaaaaaaaaarrgh!" Parakarry suddenly leaned forward onto his stomach, his face buried in his arms and crying.

"Um… Parakarry?" said Mario. "Is it really that bad?"

Parakarry refused to lift his head up. He spoke to Mario in a sad, muffled voice.

"Mario…" he said. "You know… why I came… with you?"

"Um… Because you thought I needed help?"

"Well… yes… but that's not the…reason... why I came… I came… because I… I…"

"You what?"

"I… I…" Parakarry almost couldn't speak. He just felt so guilty. He really couldn't go through with this… but it was no use… he had to spit it out. He knew it would hurt just to say it… and it would probably even hurt Mario to hear it… but he had to tell him the truth one way or the other.

"Parakarry?" said Mario.


It definitely hurt Parakarry to say it. He cried even louder. He felt like he really had been using Mario. But to admit it made him feel worse.

"I know," whispered Parakarry. "You're probably *sniff* angry with me right now for being such a coward… I'm… I'm so sorry…"

"… I could be…" said Mario. "I should be… but I'm not."

Parakarry stopped crying. He opened his eyes, looking at Mario from behind his arms, which were still covering his beak, which was wet with tears.

"You're… not?" whispered Parakarry through his arms.

"Of course I’m not," said Mario. "So what if you only wanted to get away from your boss? You still fought like you never fought before. You saved me from those Dry Bones in Pipe Land, and you got us away from those Boos and Dry Bones even though your wing was abused so many times. Ultimately, you never gave up. For that, I say you weren't a coward at all."

Parakarry sat up. Though speechless, he managed to work a smile onto his face. Mario smiled back.

"So…" said Mario. "Are you ready?"

Parakarry held the Super Scope up.

"Let's do this!" said Parakarry.

"Come on," said Mario. "Let's go before the bad, the ugly, and the really ugly show up again…"

They walked away.


Mario and Parakarry were both still unsure about who could've kidnapped Luigi… in fact, they didn't know where Luigi was. Sure, he was in Twilight Land, but where in Twilight Land?

"How are we supposed to find Luigi in this huge, spooky forest?" asked Parakarry.

"I don't really know…" said Mario. He looked ahead. There was a tree that was taller than the rest. This gave Mario an idea.

"I'll be right back," he said to Parakarry. "Stay here and keep watch for any trouble."

Parakarry nodded. Mario ran to the tree and started climbing. Three-quarters of the way up, he was higher than the other trees. Mario looked around. He suddenly spotted a large shape in the distance. Mario squinted his eyes to get a clearer view. He could then make out a large mansion. Mario slowly climbed back down to the tree base.

"Well," said Parakarry, "what'd you see… besides treetops?"

"There's a huge mansion not too far from here," said Mario. "I think it's… this way."

They walked off in the direction of the mansion.


Later, Mario and Parakarry found themselves at the entrance to a huge cemetery. The mansion was beyond the cemetery.

"So…" said Parakarry. "Ya think Luigi's in there?"

"Yep," said Mario. "I bet my last coin…"

Parakarry took a deep breath. "Well…" he said, "here we go…"

They slowly walked into the cemetery. As they walked, they looked all around cautiously. Something could pop out any second. Anything could happen…

Suddenly, Mario stopped.

"W-w-what's wrong?" asked Parakarry, a little nervous.

"That grave…" said Mario, pointing at a rectangular hole in front of a large gravestone. "It's… empty."

Mario walked up to the empty grave. He bent down and read the text on gravestone.

"… Parakarry?" said Mario. "Look at this…"

Parakarry walked up to the gravestone. He bent down next to Mario and read the text:

Here lies Kornelius Koopa, resident of this property for over 30 years until his mysterious death. Therefore, this property is now inherited by his son, Kent C. Koopa.

"I… don't believe it," said Parakarry. "This is… Kent C. Koopa's… father!"

"Yes," said Mario. "Though I don't know why Kent never took ownership of the mansion…"

"Maybe no one told him…"

Suddenly, they heard a cackle. They looked around.

"Um…" said Parakarry. "I think we should keep moving…"

"I think so too," said Mario.

They started walking again. Suddenly, something grabbed Parakarry's ankles. Parakarry jumped. He looked down to see a pair of boney hands sticking up from the ground, clutching his ankles!

"ACK!" Parakarry yelped. "LET GO!!!"

Before Mario could do anything to help, another pair of boney hands rose from the ground and grabbed his ankles!

"Huh?!" said Mario. "What's going on here?!"

"Well now," said a voice. "A little… trapped, aren't we? MHAHAHAHAHA!!!"

Mario and Parakarry jumped and looked all around. They’d definitely heard a voice, but from where?

"W-w-where are you?!" yelled Parakarry.

"Well WE could be anywhere!" said another voice.

"Yeah!" said yet another voice. "Even right behind you!"

Mario and Parakarry whipped around. There were the Huge Boos, regular Boos, and Dry Bones, their eyes glowing! Mario and Parakarry struggled to move, but the hands in the ground, obviously the hands of Dry Bones zombies, clung harder on their ankles.

"That's… bad!" Parakarry squeaked.

"Now hold still!" said a Huge Boo. "Or this'll hurt a lot more than it would!"

"Like we have a choice…" said Mario.


Mario woke up. He looked around. He and Parakarry were in a small room with no windows. Parakarry was still unconscious. A minute later, he woke up.

"Mario…" said Parakarry, rubbing his head. "Where are we?"

"I think were inside the mansion…" said Mario.

Parakarry slowly tried to get up, feeling a little pain in his wing. He winced. He walked up to the door and tried to open it. No good…

"Hey… we're locked in…" said Parakarry. "How do we get outta here?"

Suddenly, he heard a "click" in the doorknob. He backed off in a fright. The door opened, and there stood what appeared to be a Garganttuan Dry Bones!

"Oh… my," said Parakarry.

"Allow me," said the Dry Bones, "to start things off by saying… I AM THE ALL-POWERFUL KING BIG BONES!!! MHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! *ClumpClumpClump*"

"So YOU kidnapped my brother!" said Mario.

"EXACTLY!!!" said King Big Bones.

"WHERE'S MY BROTHER?!" demanded Mario.

"I'm glad you asked… GUARDS!!!"

Two Dry Bones ran in and grabbed Mario and Parakarry before they could do anything. King Big Bones motioned them to follow.


King Bones and his guards took Mario and Parakarry to the mansion's dungeon. There, a surprise was waiting for Mario.

"LUIGI!!!" cried Mario.

Sure enough, there was Luigi, unconscious, in one of the dungeon cells… and not just Luigi, but unconscious in the cells beyond that were Princess Daisy, the Chicken, Wart, and some Shy Guys, Snifits, Beezos, and Tweeters from the 8-Bit Club (that's the name of Wart's army).


"DUH!" said King Big Bones. "Well, you've seen your brother! So while you're locked in that room, WE'LL be thinking about what kind of demise you, your friend, and the rest of our prisoners deserve! And once we're rid of you, THE WORLD WILL BE OURS!!! MHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! *ClumpClumpClump*"


Mario and Parakarry were thrown back into room. The door was immediately slammed shut and locked.

"I get it now…" said Mario. "He wanted to get Luigi and me out of the way so nothing could stop him from world domination."

"Well," said Parakarry, "that's too bad for him… 'cause WE'RE gonna destroy him!!!"

Mario just stared. "Wow…" he said. "You seem confident…"

"Well… to be honest," said Parakarry, "I'm not all that sure we can stop him… but that doesn't mean I'm giving up!"

Mario's eyes widened. Suddenly, Mario realized something.

"Um… Parakarry?"


"Where's the Super Scope?"

Parakarry froze. He reached into his shell. No Super Scope.

"Uh oh…" said Parakarry. "They took the Super Scope…"

"Well," said Mario, "let's just focus on getting out of here."

"But how?"

"Maybe this'll work…"

Mario got up and charged at the door headfirst. OUCH! No avail…

"Ugh!" Mario groaned, rubbing his head. "Well… that didn't work…"

"Let me try," said Parakarry.

Mario moved out of the way. Parakarry retreated into his shell and slid into the door. Again, no avail.

"Maybe we can break the lock…” said Mario.

Parakarry popped back out. "It's worth a shot…" he said.

Mario began tugging at the doorknob. Parakarry helped, only for Mario to lose his grip and send them both stumbling backwards onto the floor. Parakarry took his helmet off and banged it into the doorknob. They tried everything, but all their efforts only loosened the doorknob. The lock remained intact.

"This isn't working…" said Mario, watching Parakarry tugging on the loose knob. "Parakarry. don't hurt yourself…"

Parakarry continued pulling. "Just… a little… moooooooooooooooore!!!" he groaned.

Parakarry gave it one more good heave, and the doorknob broke off.

"Oh great!" said Mario. "Nice Parakarry, NOW how are we going to open the door?!"

"Like this…" said Parakarry. He gently pushed on the door, which flew open easily. Mario just stared.

"You coming?" mused Parakarry.


Mario and Parakarry cautiously walked through the dark hallways of the mansion. Both were a little nervous, but otherwise confident. Neither said a word. They were just about to round a corner when they saw the Boos coming from that direction. Mario and Parakarry hid in the shadows. The Boos rounded the corner without catching sight of Mario or Parakarry. They stepped out of the shadows, wiping their foreheads, and walked around the corner. Both were unarmed, so how would they destroy King Big Bones? They weren't so sure, but they would have to try.

Fifteen minutes passed, and Mario and Parakarry were still wandering through the halls.

"Where IS that King Big Bones guy?" asked Parakarry.

Mario shrugged.

They continued walking. Eventually, they reached a staircase. Mario and Parakarry looked at each other. Then they slowly started up the stairs.

Suddenly, the first ten steps of the staircase fell forward, as did Mario and Parakarry. The first ten steps were now a set of steps leading downward into a dark corridor under the main staircase.

"Ugh…" said Parakarry. "What just happened?"

"That just happened…," said Mario, pointing at the downed stairs. They both got up and dusted themselves off. Then they walked into the corridor.


The tunnel was long and dark (so dark that only their eyes were visible). Both were still silent as they walked. Suddenly, they heard voices. Ahead was a door. They slowly walked up to it and put their ears against it. They could now hear everything being said.

Inside the door…


"Pelt them to death with bones?! You have GOT to be fooling! NEXT!!!"

"Hmm… We could shoot them multiple times with our lasers…"

"Too simple! NEXT!!!"

"We could kill them and eat their livers…"

"… But I already WANT to kill them you imbecile!!!"

"… Oh."



"Feed them to the Mad Piano, you say...? I LIKE IT!!! MHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! *ClumpClumpClump* … NOW GO GET THE PRISONERS AND THROW THEM IN THE MAD PIANO ROOM!!!"

Outside the door…

"Mario," said Parakarry, "I think we came at a bad time…"

"Me too," said Mario.

Just as they started to run away, the door opened. The Boos, Dry Bones, Huge Boos, and King Big Bones spotted Mario and Parakarry running.

"WHAT?!" bellowed King Big Bones. "THEY'VE ESCAPED!!! GET THEM!!!"

Mario and Parakarry darted out of the corridor, with King Big Bones and his minions in chase.

"DON'T LET THEM GET AWAY!!!" bellowed King Big Bones.

Mario and Parakarry continued running. "NOW WHAT?!" asked Parakarry.

"JUST KEEP RUNNING!!!" replied Mario.

Bones and laser beams flew past them. One bone hit Parakarry's wing. Parakarry winced hard, but kept running.

Suddenly, another Huge Boo materialized in front of them! Mario and Parakarry stopped, then turned around to face the rest of the militia.

"SHOOT THEM!!!" bellowed King Big Bones.

"Not again," said Parakarry.



Mario and Parakarry woke up to find themselves in a large room with a black piano in the middle of the floor. King Big Bones stood by the door.

"I sure hope you're hungry," said King Big Bones.

"Hungry?! Why?!" asked Mario.

"I WAS NOT TALKING TO YOU!!!" bellowed King Big Bones.

"Oh… Well, who WERE you talking to?" asked Parakarry


King Bones slammed the door shut and locked it. Mario and Parakarry looked at each other.

"How can being trapped in a room kill us?" asked Parakarry.

"Because of that…" said Mario, pointing to the piano. Parakarry walked over to it. He looked at it and rolled his eyes.

"Mario…” he said, "it's a piano…"

"Yes… A piano with a bad temper…"

Parakarry slapped the piano. Then he jumped on top of it and began bouncing on it.

"Look!" he said. "It's just a normal piano. Can a piano eat me alive? I don't think so!"

"Parakarry… I don't think you should be doing that…"

"How come?"

Suddenly, the piano jumped and lurched forward, throwing Parakarry off! Parakarry landed with a thud. The piano bounced towards him, snapping its razor sharp "jaws".

"AAAAACK!!!" cried Parakarry. "IT'S ALIVE!!!"

Mario ran towards the piano and jumped on it, slamming the top of it shut. The piano bounced around the room, trying to open its mouth and throw Mario off. Parakarry ran to help Mario. He also jumped onto the piano to hold its mouth closed. It was no good. The piano eventually threw them both off. It bounced towards them. Mario and Parakarry jumped out of the way. The piano went after Parakarry again.

"How do we tame this beast?!" Mario asked himself. He thought hard.


COME ON!!! Mario thought. THINK, MARIO!!! THINK!!!...



"PARAKARRY!!!" yelled Mario. "PLAY THE PIANO'S KEYS!!!"

Parakarry whipped around and desperately jumped over the piano to the side with the keys. He began bashing the piano keys. The piano yelped. Since its teeth were taking the place of the strings, hitting the keys would cause the teeth to rattle.

"HEY!!! IT'S WORKING!!!" said Parakarry.

"GREAT!!!" said Mario. "NOW KEEP IT RIGHT THERE!!!" Parakarry continued to bash the keys. Mario jumped on top of the piano and ground pounded, smashing the piano.

"Phew!" said Parakarry, wiping his forehead. "You know, I always wanted to play the piano, but now I think I should reconsider that…"

"Come on!" said Mario. "Let's go and see if we can give that King Bones guy a piece of our minds…"

"WHAT'S GOING ON IN THERE?!" bellowed a voice.

The door burst open, and there stood the Boos, Huge Boos, and Dry Bones!

"WOAH!!!" said Mario. "TIME TO HIT THE LIGHTS!!!"

Mario jumped and punched a small cage suspended from the ceiling with a Lil' Sparky in it. The Lil' Sparky lit up. The Boos and Huge Boos all covered their eyes.

"AAAAAAACK!!!" cried a Boo. "NOT THE LIGHT!!!"

"LET ME OUTTA HERE!!!" bellowed a Huge Boo.

The Boos (regular and huge) all ran away. The Boos possessing the Dry Bones left the Dry Bones’ bodies and ran away covering their eyes. Parakarry retreated into his shell and slid into the Dry Bones zombies, knocking them to pieces.

"Now THAT was a near disaster," said Parakarry.

"Yeah…” said Mario. "Come on… Let's find that King Big Bones… Speaking of King Big Bones… I think I just figured something out about him…"

They left the room.


King Big Bones sat happily on his throne.

"MHAHAHAHA!!! *ClumpClumpClump*" he laughed. "Everything is going just as planned! When this night is over, we will have destroyed the Mario Brothers, along with that Parakoopa, Princess Daisy, that Chicken, and that idiot King Wart. And I will assemble an army larger than any other, and with our superior strength, WE SHALL CONQUER THE WORLD!!! MHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA!!! *ClumpClumpClump*"

Suddenly, the throne room door burst open, and into the room ran Mario and Parakarry.

"DON'T BET ON IT, KING BONEHEAD!!!" yelled Parakarry.


"That crazy instrument of yours is all smashed up!" said Mario. "And YOU'RE about to end up the same way… Kornelius Koopa!"

King Big Bones jumped. "So… you figured out my real name, huh?!" he said. "Now I must dispose of you quickly! I will rue this day!"

King Big Bones's eyes began to glow. Mario and Parakarry noticed this.

"You have laser vision?" said Mario. "Then… you're just a Big Boo in disguise!"


Parakarry took a deep breath.

"Bring it!" he said

King Big Bones suddenly jumped from his throne and blasted at them with his laser vision. Mario and Parakarry jumped out of the way. King Big Bones blasted laser after laser after laser, leaving them barely any time to defend themselves. Parakarry retreated into his shell and slammed into King Big Bones, but Parakarry's shell simply bounced off King Big Bones. Parakarry continued to slam into him. Mario jump-kicked King Big Bones in the face. King Big Bones stumbled a little, but regained his footing and stomped the ground hard, causing the floor to shake. Mario was shaken up a bit. Parakarry's shell jiggled around the shaking floor. He popped back out and stumbled dizzily. King Big Bones blasted another laser. Mario backflipped to avoid it. King Big Bones then threw a huge bone at Parakarry and stomped again. Parakarry dodged the bone, but was shaken by stomp, as was Mario. Both regained their footing. Mario jumped up and kicked King Big Bones in the face. King Big Bones roared in pain. He then threw multiple bones at Mario and shot multiple lasers at Parakarry. Mario narrowly avoided the bones, though one barely skimmed his right arm. Parakarry missed the laser shots. Mario jumped at King Big Bones again, but King Bones knocked him back. Suddenly, he was hit in the side of the skull by Parakarry's fist. Parakarry then grabbed King Big Bones's shell. King Big Bones shook hard, trying to make Parakarry fly off, but Parakarry hung tough on the shell. Mario, judging his moment, jump-kicked King Big Bones again. King Big Bones stumbled, with Parakarry still on his shell. King Big Bones recovered and again tried to shake Parakarry off.

"GET OFF ME YOU IMBECILE!!!" King Big Bones bellowed. Parakarry refused to let go. He punched King Bones in the side of the head. King Big Bones roared. Mario jumped high and pounded King Big Bones in the head. King Big Bones roared again. Mario ran to the backside of King Big Bones and grabbed his tailbone. He began swinging him around several times until finally letting go. King Big Bones flew into the wall, Parakarry still on his shell, though a little dizzy. King Big Bones recovered and fired four lasers at Mario, who dodged them all. King Bones suddenly threw a bone at Mario. It hit Mario, knocking him back, dazed. King Big Bones again started shaking to get Parakarry off. Parakarry, too dizzy to hang on anymore, was thrown off, landing on his stomach. Mario recovered and charged at King Big Bones. King Big Bones blasted another laser at Mario, who dodged it. Mario tried to jump-kick King Big Bones in the face, but King Big Bones dodged, allowing Mario to slam into the wall. Mario stumbled dizzily, but recovered and again grabbed King Big Bones's tailbone. He swung King Big Bones into the wall.

Parakarry finally got up. He looked to see that King Big Bones had not lost a single bone, even though he and Mario were hitting King Big Bones hard. He charged at King Big Bones, who had just gotten up after hitting the wall. King Big Bones suddenly punched Parakarry back. Parakarry flew backwards about ten feet and yelped in pain.


Back in the dungeon, Princess Daisy had finally woken up.

"… Where am I?" she asked herself.

She looked around. She was in a dungeon cell. She walked over to the bars. She thought for a second, and got an idea. She took out a bobby pin she had in her hair. She slipped her arms through the bars and began picking the lock. It unlocked. She opened the cell and walked out. She looked at the cells next to her, which were occupied by Luigi, the Chicken, Wart, and his minions. All were just waking up.

"What happened?" said Luigi. "… Wait, I remember now… That huge Dry Bones…"

"HEY!!!" bellowed Wart. "Bring that bobby pin over here! I WANT OUT!!!"

"With an attitude like THAT," said Daisy. "I probably shouldn't…"

Daisy walked up to Luigi's cell and picked the lock open with the bobby pin. She opened the cell, and Luigi walked out.

"I don't really know where we are," he said as Daisy opened the Chicken's cell, "but I'd like to get out…"

"Don't worry," said Daisy. "I bet your brother's on his way to the rescue right now.

Suddenly, they heard some stomping. They all looked at each other.

"Or maybe he's already here… Ba-KAWK!!!" said the Chicken.

"How do you know?"

"A Boo forced me to take a message to him saying that Luigi is in Twilight Land. All this time while we were out, he probably made it inside BA-KAWK!!! … But I'm guessing… Maybe I should look around just to be sure…"

"If you do find Mario," said Luigi, "give him this…" Luigi reached into his pocket and pulled out a Starman! He handed it to the Chicken.

"I never did get to use it when I was fighting Wart…" said Luigi. "But Mario might need it more than me…"

"Wow…" said the Chicken.

"Be careful…" said Daisy. "I'm sure this place is crawling with Boos and Dry Bones…"

The Chicken nodded and ran out of the dungeon, following the sounds of the stomps.

"You know?" said Luigi. "I think I'll go with him, just in case he needs help. WAIT FOR ME!!!" Luigi ran off after the Chicken.

"So…" said Wart, "you want to go ahead and let me out now?"

"I'll think about it…" said Daisy.



Mario and Parakarry were growing weary. They had hit King Big Bones with everything they had, which wasn't much. Nevertheless, they still fought hard. Mario jumped up and punched King Bones between the eyes. King Big Bones roared in pain. He recovered and grabbed Mario, throwing him into the wall. Mario sat dazed as King Big Bones prepared to fire one more laser at him! Before he could, Parakarry jumped on him and covered King Big Bones's eyes with his helmet (which Parakarry took off).

"HEY!!! GET THIS THING OFF!!!" bellowed King Big Bones. He fired his lasers, blowing two holes in Parakarry's helmet. Parakarry put his helmet back on and tried to hold on to King Big Bones shell again, hitting him in the head a few times. King Big Bones suddenly lurched forward, causing Parakarry to fly forward a bit. Parakarry grabbed King Bones's beak to avoid falling off, and held on. King Big Bones viciously shook to try throw Parakarry off. Parakarry refused to let go. King Big Bones stopped.

"Stubborn little guy, aren’t you," he taunted. Parakarry didn't say a word. He looked back at the dazed Mario.

"Give it up already!" said King Big Bones. He suddenly shook again, and Parakarry, who wasn't ready for that, was slung into the wall opposite Mario… shell first, right on his injured wing!

"OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWW!!!" cried Parakarry. King Big Bones slowly walked over to him. Parakarry winced extremely hard.

"You know," said King Big Bones coldly, "you could have simply stayed out of this. If you had, you wouldn't be feeling the extreme pain you feel now!"

Parakarry was silent, except for a few groans and wincing.

"But since you didn't," continued King Big Bones, "you'll just have to pay the ultimate price! MHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! *ClumpClumpClump*"

Parakarry was still silent, with a very sharp pain in his wing.

Mario was just recovering. He rubbed his head, then looked up and saw Parakarry trapped by the wall with King Big Bones standing over him. King Big Bones’s eyes began to glow. "So long, imbecile!" he said.

He was just about to fire his laser when he was kicked in the back of the head by Mario. King Big Bones roared in pain. He whipped around to see Mario.

"Back for more, are you!" King Big Bones taunted. King Big Bones was about to shoot him when the throne room door burst open. The Chicken flew in, later followed by Luigi.

"LUIGI!!!" cried Mario.

"Looks like you guys could use a little help," said Luigi.

"WHAT?!" yelled King Big Bones. "YOU ESCAPED?!"

"Hey Mario! Catch!" said the Chicken. He dropped the Starman towards Mario

"Just what I needed!" said Mario. He caught the Starman, turning himself into Invincible Mario. He charged at King Big Bones and slammed into his ribs. King Big Bones began to shake and crack!

"NNNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" King Big Bones wailed. Seconds later, King Big Bones flew apart and shattered into many pieces. Everyone ducked to avoid the flying debris.

"We… did it!" said Mario. "Where did you get that Starman?" he asked the Chicken.

"Luigi gave it to me to give to you," said the Chicken. "Ba-KAWK!!!"

"I never got to use it when I was fighting Wart," said Luigi. "So I figured you would need it."

"Well… Thanks, Bro!" said Mario. "Very much! I think that's the first AND last we'll ever see of that King Big Bones guy…"

"I don't mean to interrupt," said the Chicken. "But… is he okay? Ba-KAWK!!!" The Chicken pointed at Parakarry, who was still sitting against the wall, wincing hard.

"AAH!!! PARAKARRY!!!" cried Mario. He ran over to him, as did Luigi and the Chicken. He examined Parakarry's wing, which was now rolled! Mario grimaced at the injury. Parakarry looked at him, still wincing.

"Parakarry?" Mario said to him. "I can't thank you enough for helping me rescue Luigi."

Parakarry, despite his wincing, managed to work a smile on his face.

"You’re… welcome," he said. "I still don't know if my boss will buy this whole thing…"

"Look," said Mario, "that cast on your wing is all the proof you need. He'll understand… Trust me."

"Well…" said Parakarry. Suddenly, he remembered something, and looked down. "If he does understand… then… how will he get all that mail delivered while I'm injured? Deliver it himself?"

"Mail?!" said the Chicken. "You carry mail?"

"Yeah… Why?"

"'Cause I like delivering things, myself. Ba-KAWK!!! If you have to miss work, I'd be happy to fill in for you until you're better!"

Parakarry's eyes widened. He couldn't think of anything to say, and simply smiled. The Chicken smiled back.


After rounding up Princess Daisy, Wart (who Daisy finally decided to let out of the dungeon cell), and his minions, the group left the mansion, with the pieces of King Bones still scattered around the throne room, never to reassemble. It was now mid-morning. They began the long journey home. Suddenly, Mario remembered something.

"Hey…" he said. "We never did get the Super Scope back… Oh well… I can buy another. People sell them all the time…"

Eventually, the group separated, with Wart and his minions returning to his castle in the sky (he was feeling tired for some reason and didn't feel like fighting his enemies), Daisy returning to Sarasaland, and Mario, Luigi, and Parakarry returning to the Mushroom Kingdom along with the Chicken.

When they finally reached the Mushroom Kingdom in the afternoon, Mario went to the post office with Parakarry and the Chicken to help Parakarry explain the whole thing. To Parakarry's surprise, Postmaster understood everything…

"And you thought I was gonna fire you just for an injury?!" laughed Postmaster. "HAHAHAHAHA!!!"

"So…" said Parakarry, "you're… NOT gonna fire me?"

"Of course not!" said Postmaster. "You may be… um… well… a little clumsy…"

Parakarry rolled his eyes.

"But you're still my best mailcarrier… and my favorite at that… and I'm not gonna let one little injury kill your job. Look, all I ask for is perfection, but other than that… I'm pretty easy. So don't let your nerves get the best of you…"

Parakarry was, once again, speechless. Was he really his favorite mailcarrier?

"But please be more careful next time," continued Postmaster. "While you were gone, I had to carry your mail myself, and I'm too old for this…"

"Yes sir," said Parakarry.

Postmaster turned to the Chicken.

"And you say you want to fill in for Parakarry until he's better?"

"Yeah! Ba-KAWK!!!" said the Chicken.

"Then it's settled," said Postmaster. "I want you on the job first thing in the morning!"

"Yes sir!" said the Chicken. "I won't let you down!"

"Oh… Hey," said Mario. "You never told us your name…"

The Chicken slapped himself. "Oh… How could I forget!?" he said to himself. "My name's Flapps, with two P's. Ba-KAWK!!!"

The next day and for the next three weeks, Flapps was on the job. He was as good as his word. Though he had a few tangles, he worked his hardest, being that he was, of course, doing it for Parakarry, who would sometimes catch a glimpse of Flapps flying across the sky with his bag of mail. He would always wave whenever he saw him.

After the three weeks, Parakarry's wing had fully healed and he was back on the job, this time being a lot more careful than before. What about Flapps? Postmaster thought Flapps did such a good job that he decided to hire Flapps full time. Flapps couldn't have been happy enough. He and Parakarry became friends and work buddies.

One day Parakarry went to Koopa Village. He told Kent C. Koopa about the mansion he inherited, though he left out the part about Kent's father. At first, Kent thought living in a huge mansion would be cool, but when Parakarry told him about the mansion's spooky setting, Kent began to have second thoughts. Parakarry couldn’t blame him.

Mario was happy to have his brother back, and Luigi was happy to BE back. He had bought a new Super Scope, which cost him 100 coins… Oh well… It was worth it. One thing that he thought about was whether or not he would ever cross paths with Woshi and K.K. A couple of nice guys they were… and a couple of fighters they were, too.

Anyway, what mattered was that King Big Bones had come up way short in his plot, and paid dearly. With his existence ended, Plit was once again safe from possible disaster…

The End

Did you like this submission?
If you would like to send some feedback to the author of this submission, please complete this form.

What's your name? 
This is required.

What's your Email address?
Only enter this if you would like the author to respond.

How do you rate this submission? 
Please rate on a scale of 1 - 10, 10 being best.

Does this submission belong in Little Lemmy's Land? 
Little Lemmy's Land is designed to include the top ten percent of submissions.

Would you like to see more from this author? 

Comments and suggestions: Stunning, fast, FREE!
FREE feedback form powered by

Comments, suggestions, stories, or story ideas? Email me!
Go back to Lemmy's Fun Fiction.
Go back to my main page.