Chapter 21: Entrance to Subspace
Last time our heroes found out that with all the randomness, the universe is no longer stable and they must also find the Crystal Hearts. The Emerald Heart was found in Youtube Poop, where the heroes battled against many key figures of Youtube Poop. But the Heart had been sent away in an explosion. What will our heroes do?
Purple: … Oh forget it! Why are we even doing this?!
Luigi: What?
Purple: I can’t take this much in a plot! Let’s just take the fight to Subspace and undo it like those guys in the game did!
Fin: How do we do that?
Everyone then gets the same idea. Soon…
Gadd: Are you sure? What about the Crystal Hearts?
Purple: We’ll use them in another story.
Gadd: Well the Ancient Minister had ways of getting to Subspace, but Dark Red destroyed him. The other members of the Bowling Team of Doom might’ve also had ways, but they’re all defeated too. So we’ll just have to fly into a Subspace Bubble! Quick, everyone, to the Gaddmobile!
Everyone follows Gadd to a rocket. Oddly, there are enough seats for everybody. The ship then blasts off and goes through the roof.
Gadd: Squadala! We are off!
Everyone Else: What?
The rocket soon heads for the Subspace Bubble, where Shroob City was, and actually manages to enter. They get out.
Fin: Subspace sure is similar to how it was in the game. Didn’t it look different earlier in the story?
Gadd: That was before the author knew better. Now go, go and find some way to save people! I’ll stay here for no reason!
Yux: I hate you.
Gadd: Shut up. However, take this laptop!
PURPLE GOT THE LAPTOP!
Gadd: And here’s a piece of paper with a link to an important Youtube video that will help you in the most desperate hour!
PURPLE GOT THE PAPER WITH THE LINK ON IT!
Purple: Uh, okay. I guess we should go now.
Purple and the party continue forth, finding ruins of various Mushroom Kingdom locations in the background. After a ways, the heroes find some guy floating in midair.
Everyone but Luigi: Who is that?
Luigi: … IT’S TABUU!
Purple: Tabuu?! Oh my DAD!
Yux: Oh my DAD!
P.T.: Oh my DAD!
Rufus: Oh my DAD!
Fin: Ah mi PAPA!
It’s true. A few yards from the cliff they’re on is Tabuu, in midair.
Tabuu: … Doom… Death… Destruction… Pain… Suffering… Trauma…
P.T.: Are you emo?
Tabuu: … Shut up! I’m trying to be dramatic!
Purple: What are you doing?
Tabuu: What do you think? I’m trying to takeover your world.
Everyone: ZUH?!
Tabuu: That’s right. I’m trying to destroy your world! Smashgea didn’t die so easily so I’m hoping Plit will. I’ve employed the Bowling Team of Doom to attack the world so it can be destroyed by Subspace.
Fin: Smashgea?
Tabuu: The name I made up for the location of the world in that game. It’s a mix of “Smash” and “Pangea”.
Rufus: Then how’d the Shroobs get a Subspace Bomb?
Tabuu: Uh, well, I had to make some cutbacks… So I had it sold on eBay.
Everyone: …
Tabuu: Don’t judge me… Now, I’m impressed that you made it this far. I thought the Ancient Minister would stop you and I thought you’d never find out about the other four guys, meaning they could go ahead and attack Plit. Bill Gates, Waluigi, and Ballyhoo were the most powerful members, so I didn’t think you’d beat them. I didn’t even think you’d find a way here, but you did. Well that’s enough from you. So now you DIE!
Tabuu’s rainbow wings appear and he shoots an Off-Wave at Fin, turning him into a trophy.
Tabuu: *CD-i Bowser laugh*
Purple: FIN!
Tabuu: Now I have a proposition for you. If you agree to it, I may spare you.
Purple: Never!
Rufus: Hold on, Purple, this might be good.
Purple: Rufus!
P.T.: No, no. Let’s hear what he has to say.
Luigi: Yeah, I wanna see where this is going.
Purple: Guys! Ugh. Fine, what’s your offer?
Tabuu: Join me, heroes, and I will make your faces the greatest in Koridai. Or you will die.
Gwonam: Your Majesty, Tabuu and his minions have seized the island of Koridai.
Purple: What?! We’ve never heard of the place! No deal!
P.T.: Wait!
P.T. walks over to the edge of the cliff and turns to the others.
P.T.: I accept! Because... I was secretly one of the bad guys all along! I bet you didn’t expect that!
Everyone Else: Gasp!
P.T.: … Nah, just messing with you. I’m not a bad guy.
Everyone Else: …
P.T. goes back to the others.
Tabuu: YOU MUST DIE!
Tabuu spreads his wings and sends more Off-Waves, but as he does…
Yux: Randomize!
He glows and stops, right before becoming a trophy like the others, who then become scattered. Then Tabuu hides inside a glowing ball of light. In some random part of Subspace, some guy gets out from under some wreckage… Shade!
Shade: My head… Hmm? Hey, I’m back in the story! Finally after all that time!
Shade looks and sees a blue light far away.
Shade: … That’s weird. I wonder what it is.
Meanwhile…
Gadd: I’m bored.
Suddenly Gadd’s lab comes crashing down near him.
Gadd: Oh DAD, they got my house!
Suddenly Red’s portrait falls from the top of the wreckage and lands next to Gadd’s feet. Remember he was the Fire Bro that turned evil and then fused with Agent Dark and then became a recurring enemy, then finally got defeated and turned into a Boo then separated from Agent Dark when they were both made into portraits.
Gadd: I bet those idiots are probably off dying somewhere… Wait!
Gadd takes the portrait and then goes through the remains of his lab to find his machine that turned Dark Red Boo into the portraits of Agent Dark and Red.
Gadd: Idea!
He uses the machine in reverse to turn Red back into Boo form, and then forces a 1-Up Mushroom into his mouth, turning him back into a Fire Bro.
Red: Ugh… What happened? Huh? Where am I?
Gadd: You’re back in Subspace!
Red: Noooo!
Gadd: Now listen, I don’t know how I know this but this guy up ahead is the reason for all the turmoil, so go and kill him!
Red: But-
Gadd: Silence, nonbeliever!
Red: Fine…
Red walks onward. Soon he meets Shade.
Both: Who are you?
Shade: I’m Shade, the Shy Guy that was supposed to be a main character but then got kicked out of the story for a few chapters.
Red: I’m Red, the Fire Bro who turned evil and then merged with an evil being to become a supremely powerful stalker enemy until I finally got turned into a painting and when I was restored I was normal.
Both: What are you doing? I’m heading to the bright blue light up ahead. Hey! Maybe we should join forces! Stop saying what I’m saying! I said stop! Hey! … She sells seashells by the seashore. You’re good.
Red: All right, let’s go.
They keep going forward and suddenly-
???: Stop!
At that point, the Ancient Minister, Grubba, Bill Gates, Waluigi, and Ballyhoo appear! Big Top was destroyed in the explosion since he was part of the bomb, that’s why he’s not here.
Shade: Oh my DAD, I know you guys! I read the script while I was out of the story! You’re the Bowling Team of Doom, whom my friends defeated!
Ancient Minister: Yes, and now we’re here to exact revenge!
Red: Yeah, I think I heard of you. But didn’t you all die or something?
Ancient Minister: I may have appeared to be crushed between the Thwomps, but I warped away in the nick of time and hid out for a while.
Grubba: After being trapped in an egg and used to beat Waluigi, I escaped. Later I found a Mushroom to bring me back to normal size!
Bill Gates: Bill too rich to die! Power of money revive Bill!
Waluigi: A tuna boat captured me and released me.
Ballyhoo: I’ve been here for a while, having been caught in a Subspace explosion. So of course it sent me here. But now Big Top is dead! Now we’re all here and ready to exact our revenge!
Shade and Red: Oh no!
Grubba: Now you will die!
Ancient Minister: Yes…
Suddenly two metallic, red arms burst out of the sides of the Ancient Minister! Ancient Minister then grabs Grubba and throws him at Bill Gates, knocking both out.
Waluigi: WAH! Ancient Minister, what are you doing?!
Ancient Minister: You may know me as the Ancient Minister, but I’m really-
He removes his garb.
Ancient Minister: ROB!
Everyone: ROB?!
ROB: Yes! Now it’s your turn!
ROB does an Arm Rotor attack, knocking Waluigi and Ballyhoo out.
Ballyhoo: You were loved…
Shade and Red: 0_0
ROB: Let’s just call me Rob so the author doesn’t have to keep using caps so much. It gets tiring on the fingers.
Shade: What was that all about?
Rob: You see, I heard about Tabuu trying to takeover Plit, and I hate him for what he did to my people so I tried to get into a position of power so I could be trusted. Then when the time was right, I’d be able to take him down!
Red: You know when they wake up they’ll kill you.
Rob: I’ve done worse to them.
Red: … All right…
Suddenly the Daisy and Luigi statue from Daisy Circuit crashes on top of the unconscious members of the Bowling Team of Doom, and breaks.
Rob: Ooh… Oh well, they’ve survived worse.
Shade: More and more parts of the world are getting attacked, we gotta hurry!
Red: Look!
The three look over to find Rufus’s trophy. Red goes over and taps the base.
Rufus: Ugh… DARK RED! OH NO!
Red: No, I’m normal again.
Rufus: Oh. I guess Yux’s Randomizer brought you and Shade over there back into the story and to our rescue. And who’s that?
Shade: Oh, that’s Rob, AKA the Ancient Minister. He was apparently good all along and waited for the right time. The rest of the members of the Bowling Team of Doom actually were evil though and are unconscious and under that statue.
Then Peach’s Castle crashes right next to them. It’s ruined!
Rufus: Holy Goombas with a side salad! Plit’s getting attacked by Subspace! That must be the bad news!
Rob: And when all of it is here, Tabuu will be unstoppable!
Rufus: We gotta stop him!
Shade, Red, Rob, and Rufus then continue. In another part of Subspace, Petey Piranha is asleep. He wakes up!
Petey Piranha: Ow… So that’s what that bomb did. What happened?
Prof. Frankly: You were used as a bad guy minion early in the story and were finally released from your hypnosis a few chapters later and haven’t been heard from since.
Petey Piranha: And the light a ways away?
Prof. Frankly: That’s Tabuu! You gotta stop him before all of Plit ends up here!
Petey Piranha: Why are you conveniently here and telling me just what I need to know?
Prof. Frankly: I did it earlier in the story with a few other guys, so I wanted to do it again. Bye!
He leaves. Suddenly the main planet from the Snow Cap Galaxy appears and starts falling… right on top of Petey.
Petey: Yikes!
Petey moves just in time.
Petey: Uh, I guess I should help save the world. I haven’t had much action since that time I helped Larry avenge Bowser.
Petey flaps his leaves and flies. Shortly after that, he finds Fin’s trophy and P.T.’s trophy.
Fin: Why’d you do that?
Petey: I just saved you from Ganon!
Fin: You did not!
P.T.: What are you doing?
Petey: Someone told me I gotta stop Tabuu.
P.T.: Ooh, ooh, I wanna stop Tabuu!
Petey: Well too bad, I’m already doing it!
Fin: Hey, what about me?! Anyone ever think I wanted to do that?
Yux: Guys, you can all do it! Just shut up!
P.T.: Shut up, Yux. Wait, you’re alive?
Yux: Yeah, some hobo got sucked into Subspace and found my trophy and started chewing on it, then accidentally revived me… And that didn’t stop him from trying to eat me.
Fin: Wow, that’s so… lame. You’re lame.
Yux: I hate you all!
Meanwhile, Merlon warps into Subspace next to Purple’s trophy. He revives Purple.
Merlon: Axem Purple, it is time.
Purple: What?
Merlon: I was reading about prophecies and it turns out the Ancients predicted this whole ordeal!
Purple: Okay.
Merlon: The Ancients prophesized that you must learn a special maneuver to save the day, but you can only use it once. And once you use it, anything at all could happen. And you can’t tell anyone about the move until it’s time. And you’ll know when it’s time because you’ll be glowing as if you broke a Smash Ball.
Purple: I see. Okay, I’ll try to learn it, I guess.
Merlon: Okay, but we must hurry!
Meanwhile, Shade, Red, Rufus, and Rob are dodging falling objects and find Luigi’s trophy and revive him.
Luigi: Mamamia!
After some explaining…
Luigi: Oh. So now what?
Rob: We must defeat Tabuu!
Luigi: Oh my… Okay…
They keep walking ahead when suddenly a laser whizzes by, barely missing. They turn to find… the entire Shroob army with the Royal Shroobs!
Rufus: Aw man!
Shade: You were the current bad guys right as I was getting kicked out of the story!
King Shroob: My army… attack!
The Shroobs march forward.
Good Guys: Aw man!
Luigi: We’ll never defeat them all!
Suddenly the Mega Shell zooms by, taking out the aliens.
Rufus: That was convenient.
???: ROOAR!
The heroes turn again to find Fiery Dino Piranha.
Rufus and Luigi: NOT AGAIN!
Rob: All the enemies in this story seem to be reappearing all at once!
Fiery Dino Piranha starts charging forward and everyone gets out of the way. Shade moves his feet so he’s standing on his heels, and wheels come out of his shoes.
Rufus: I’ve heard of those shoes!
Shade skates along after Fiery Dino Piranha (who is unaware that the heroes dodged his charge) and spins into his tail, causing it to smack him in the head. Fiery Dino Piranha gets mad and turns around and starts chasing Shade.
Shade: Maybe that wasn’t the best idea!
Rufus, Red, and Luigi get out of the way. Rob sets out a Gyro block and starts charging up a shot. Finally he releases the spinning top and it flies over Shade’s head and into Fiery Dino Piranha’s mouth, and he chokes on it. Fiery Dino Piranha gets dizzy and falls over.
Luigi: That was close.
Rob: Come on, we don’t have enough time!
They hurry ahead. Meanwhile…
Merlon: And there you go. I’ll be watching from Flipside, I’m hoping you win!
Purple: Because good must always defeat evil?
Merlon: No, because after this, he’s gonna try to destroy Flipside and I’m too lazy to move.
Purple: …
Merlon warps away and then Petey, Fin, P.T., and Yux as well as Rob, Rufus, Shade, Red, and Luigi all appear. After some explanations…
Purple: Okay. Well I guess this is it, time to defeat Tabuu and save Plit!
???: Wait!
Everyone turns to find Gadd.
Gadd: I got bored so I decided to come along.
Purple: All right. Let’s go, guys!
Purple, Shade, Yux, P.T., Fin, Luigi,
Rufus, Red, Gadd, Petey, and Rob all go up the stairs leading to the bright
ball, and enter.
Chapter 22: The Great “Maze”
Our heroes decided to quit beating around the bush and to take the fight to Subspace. There, they found out Tabuu was in charge of all of this as well as the Bowling Team of Doom. They were defeated, but Yux did the Randomizer, causing Shade and Red to be back in the story. They met with the Bowling Team of Doom, and the Ancient Minister betrayed his team and revealed himself as ROB. The bad news was that now Plit was being attacked hard by Subspace. With little time, they found Rufus and decided to quickly find Tabuu. They then saved everyone else. Petey Piranha also joined the team and saved some others. The Shroobs and Fiery Dino Piranha came back for a final appearance, but were beaten. Purple also learned a secret move from Merlon that’s only to be used in the most desperate time. Finally Gadd decided to join the team for their final confrontation. Now they’re after Tabuu.
The group notices that they’re in a similar environment, but with trophies of all of them and most of the story’s major enemies scattered around, guarding that door behind them.
Tabuu’s voice: Bwahahahaha! I see you’ve all found each other and come back to life! Well if you want to beat me, you gotta find me! On the other side of that door is my trick to finishing off all of Plit and just maybe parts of some surrounding universes! You’ve got two hours to stop me! Otherwise, BOOM!
Purple: … We’ve gotta hurry, come on!
Purple leads everyone to a door nearby. The door takes them to Delfino Plaza. It’s black and white, and the only people with Purple are Shade, Yux, and P.T.
Purple: Huh?
Shade: This must be like in WindWaker when boss recreations were monochrome! And like how you could only use items that were present at the time, I guess this means you can only have people who were present at the time with you.
P.T.: Guys, look!
They look to see a monochrome Mr. L and Petey Piranha headed for them.
Yux: I forgot Luigi was evil at the start of this story.
Mr. L does a Super Jump and tries to land on Purple, but Purple moves and shoves Mr. L into the water. Meanwhile Petey spits a cannonball.
P.T.: Yux, how’s your spine?
Yux: I don’t have one, but I’d say I can be pretty stiff. Why?
P.T. grabs Yux and uses him like a baseball to knock the cannonball back at Petey.
Yux: GYAAAAAAAAAAAGH!!!
P.T.: Shut up, Yux.
Mr. L shoots green fireballs at Purple, but Purple spins his axe and sends them flying in all directions. He than pokes Mr. L’s stomach with the handle, then does an uppercut punch, then a kick to the ribs, sending Mr. L a few feet. Shade skates by and gets ready for Mr. L to crash, but Shade just grabs him up and spins him around. P.T. walks up and holds his Golden Hammer out so Mr. L’s face hits it every few seconds. Finally Shade tosses Mr. L up and Yux floats up and breathes fire on him, causing Mr. L to explode. Then Petey eats Yux.
Yux: This stomach acid feels like dying!
P.T. holds Petey down and another P.T. appears with a fishing rod and casts his line. He pulls Yux out of Petey’s mouth, along with some cake.
P.T.: Cake!
Other P.T.: Cake!
Then Shade skates by with Purple on his shoulders, holding his axe out. This results in a quick, mobile slice that defeats Petey. Then a door appears. The heroes find themselves back in the first room, but the trophies of Petey Piranha and Mr. L are gone. The first door disappears and a new one takes its place. The group goes through the door to find themselves at a monochrome Thwomp Volcano.
Purple: Who’s here?
Yux: Me.
P.T.: Me.
Fin: Me.
Purple: So we’re about as plentiful as last time.
Monochrome versions of Bubble and Sonic appear. Sonic commits suicide. A monochrome version of the Ancient Minister takes his place.
Purple: Too easy.
Purple throws his axe at the Ancient Minister and he starts flying around like crazy and short-circuiting. He crashes into Bubble, and then both crash into a wall and are defeated. After leaving and coming back, the group finds that they’re in the Space Junk Galaxy.
Purple: Now it’s just Shade, Luigi, and me? Aw man.
Monochrome Tarantox appears.
Shade: Aahh!
Tarantox spits toxic goo and the protagonists dodge. Tarantox turns and aims his spit for Purple, but Shade skates and rams into the bulge on Tarantox’s butt, causing him to flip over. Luigi does a Super Jump and squishes one of his three weak points. While Tarantox is reacting, he does it again to the second. Tarantox does a wild spin and spits goo all over. They barely dodge. Purple runs and leaps onto his face, causing Tarantox to reach for Purple, and Purple runs down the spider’s back and Tarantox, trying to follow, falls over on his back for Luigi to deliver the final jump. Tarantox gets back up and is madder than before. He starts stomping around and spitting goo, when he decides to just fly.
Shade: Aww man!
Tarantox starts dropping toxic balls of goop. But flying was dumb because his belly is exposed. Three quick Super Jumps later, he’s done for. After leaving and coming back into the room, the current party is now Purple, Yux, P.T., Fin, Luigi, and Rufus. They’re on the deck of one of the airships and Monochrome Commander Shroob is shooting at them from his ship.
Purple: Where’s Shade?
Rufus: He was kicked out of the story in the very chapter this takes place in.
Purple: Oh yeah.
The alien leader shoots cannonballs and P.T. pulls out his hammer… to find he has no hammer.
P.T.: We had no weapons in this fight!
Yux: Simple.
Yux flies over and breathes fire in the Commander’s face. But then he’s grabbed and used as the next cannonball. Rufus flutter jumps over to Commander Shroob and ground pounds on him, then stuffs him into the cannon and launches him toward the sun.
Fin: That was cruel.
Rufus: Whatever.
They leave and come back and find themselves in the Snow Cap Galaxy with Monochrome Fiery Dino Piranha. The beast starts charging and spitting monochrome fire. The party find that they’re in their super power forms.
Purple: So what do we do again?
Luigi: I can fly by doing a spin in the air.
Rufus: I’m a Boo…
P.T.: Boing, boing, boing, boing-
Fin: I have wings!
Rufus: From the Wing Cap?
Fin: No, from Red Bull.
Yux: And you’re a bee.
Purple: Huh? Not again!
Yux: Good thing for me, I didn’t need a super power!
He gets eaten by Fiery Dino Piranha.
Yux: Aaahh! The dying feeling! I feel it again!
Purple flies around and finds a spot on Fiery Dino Piranha’s back. He tries to get close enough (which is hard sine FDP is moving). When he is, he stings him. Then he loses his suit because bees die when they sting.
Purple: I did damage and lost the suit. I’m efficient.
FDP starts swinging his tail around and spitting fireballs. P.T. bounces up… and lands in the attached Toad Town on Gourmet Guy.
Fin: I know! Hey! Follow me!
Fin flies off and FDP follows. He then tries to lure FDP off the edge by flying into space, but the planet has gravity on all sides.
Fin: D’oh!
Luigi spins into the monster’s tail, doing damage.
Then suddenly he stands up, grabs his tail, and whacks his head many times until he’s defeated. Boo Rufus appears in the spot where he was.
Rufus: Ha! I possessed him!
They leave and come back and find themselves on Shadow Noah Island. Monochrome Metal Gizmo SHARK breaks through the wall. He opens his mouth and a Banzai Bill flies out. It locks onto Yux.
Yux: Hey!
Purple: Aw man, not the giant robot! How’d we beat it before?
Fin: I dunno.
P.T.: I got that chain around my arm again! Get it off!
P.T. somehow removes it and swings it around, trying to get rid of it, and it accidentally hits the Banzai Bill, causing it to explode.
P.T.: … Bwahahahaha!
P.T. runs around and uses it like a whip and hits Metal Gizmo, but it bounces off and hits Yux.
Yux: I hate you all!
Purple hits SHARK with his axe and then scrambles up a few ways, and then strikes his axe into the robot again further up, then scrambles up even more. He does this until he finds the cockpit and breaks in. Monochrome Goomba gives him a murderous glare.
Purple: What?!
Purple defeats the Goomba and presses the abort button, and Metal Gizmo promptly explodes. Then Monochrome Macho Grubba appears! Rufus runs up and sticks his tongue out and swallows Macho Grubba, but he then gets back out and beats Rufus to a pulp. P.T. sneaks up and does a jumping hammer attack, sending the Clubba to the wall.
P.T.: No more steroids for you!
Grubba rampages forth and Purple gets in the way and leaps into the air and does a bunch of punches and kicks and finishes with a slash attack, and then Grubba is flattened by a Super Jump landing. Macho Grubba is defeated!
Back in the main room of the “Maze”…
P.T.: Weren’t we supposed to fight a bunch of guys right after Fiery Dino Piranha but before the robot?
Luigi: Who cares?
Shade: Wow, I realize now… I didn’t get much action in this story.
Petey: I was an enemy?!
Purple: You don’t remember?! Even though you were told this?!
Gadd: I never got to fight any bosses!
Rufus: You just sat back in your lab and instructed us.
Gadd: … Shut up.
Rob: Don’t forget about me!
The group go through the door and now they’re on top of the Excess Express. Master Chief appears with Banjo and Kazooie!
Fin: The Microsoft Guys!
Purple: … Banjo and Kazooie left Nintendo?!
Banjo holds Kazooie like a rifle and starts shooting Grenade Eggs, and Master Chief just starts shooting at the heroes. Everyone ducks and the enemies hit each other, and are defeated. Lame. Then Bill Gates drops down in a suit of gold armor. Actually it’s monochrome.
Luigi: Run, it’s Bill Gates!
Bill’s arm cannon starts shooting gold bars, but Fin leaps up and grabs each one. However Purple then takes one and throws it at Bill’s face, causing him to be in pain and the armor to fall off. Yoshi does a leap kick that knocks Bill off the train. When the heroes leave and come back, they’re in Wario’s throne room.
Luigi: WALUIGI MUST DIE!
However Monochrome Waluigi is in his super ultimate form.
Luigi: … Dang…
He charges forward, then-
Fin: Isn’t that Doopliss?
He changes into Monochrome Doopliss, and thus is defeated for being exposed. They leave and come back and find themselves in the Star Carnival with Monochrome Ballyhoo. The MC points and Wolfens appear and start shooting.
Purple: Just what we needed, Star Wolf.
P.T.: Get the guy behind me, Purple!
Rufus: (sarcastically) Gee, I’ve been saved by Purple, how swell!
Luigi just walks over next to Ballyhoo, and then when the lasers lock on and are headed straight for him he grabs Ballyhoo and holds him out before him so he takes the hit, defeating him. Luigi then Super Jumps and lands on the Wolfen, bringing it to the ground and destroying it. Since it was Wolf’s, the others are defeated too. They leave and come back to find themselves facing Monochrome Shroids.
Purple: Not these guys again!
Gadd: Hey, now I’m here!
The Shroids start charging their lasers, when Rufus quickly eats them.
Purple: That was easy.
The Monochrome Koopa Bros. then appear!
Everyone: D’oh!
Gadd: Don’t worry, I have this!
It’s Fludd!
Purple: Fludd?
Gadd: But I modified it!
Gadd squeezes the handles and lava comes out of Fludd. He aims for the Koopa Bros. so they’re quickly dispatched.
Gadd: … And now I’m all out.
Monochrome King Shroob appears in his super UFO!
Everyone: HOW MANY FIGHTS DID WE HAVE IN SHROOB CITY?!
Gadd: Don’t forget Swiggler.
Purple: Meh, he doesn’t count.
King Shroob starts shooting lasers and Purple slowly walks forward, spinning his axe to deflect the shots. When he’s close enough, he slashes the spider legs. However it’s a UFO so it floats.
Gadd: I gotta get one of those for myself!
Monochrome Guardian Shroobs appear and start shooting.
Yux: That never happened when we were here!
Luigi: Shut up, Yux.
Purple leaps up and delivers a critical blow to King Shroob.
Purple: Oh yeah! I guess I’m pretty awesome!
The heroes leave and come back to find themselves in…
Rufus: Oh no…
Voice: Youtube Poop. Where there’s smoke, they pinch back.
Monochrome copies of the known Youtube Poop characters appear.
Luigi: It’s me!
Mama Luigi: …
CD-i Luigi: …
Weegee: …
P.T.: I have an idea, can I try it?
Purple: Ugh, fine.
P.T.: … SUPER FIST OF THE YOUTUBE POOP: FIRE SUMO!
Mama Luigi’s voice: And I found myself face to face with a Fire Sumo!
A Sumo Bro appears and starts stomping, causing all the foes to fall into a gap, which then closes. The heroes leave and come back to find the only remaining foes… the Monochrome copies of themselves! Minus Petey, since he already appeared on Final Destination.
Purple: Uh oh… Uh… Fight?
Amazingly they can all fit on that platform. Purple leaps up and fights M Purple (Monochrome Purple) and they’re matched when it comes to axe skills. Petey flies up there.
Petey: GET IN MAH BELLY!
Petey eats M Purple and defeats him. Red and M Red are spitting fireballs at each other, but each ball is countered until finally Red just gets into his shell and slams into M Red, knocking him over the edge. Shade and M Shade have a game of Chicken with their skates but it’s interrupted when Yux is thrown at M Shade, defeating the clone. M Yux then tackles Shade, but Shade grabs him and throws him at Yux.
P.T.: …
M P.T.: …
They both pull out boomerangs and throw them… and accidentally hit themselves.
Rufus: Your guy’s as dumb as you are!
P.T.: Trade?
Rufus: Yeah.
Rufus throws an egg at M P.T., then trips him with his tail and does a ground pound to defeat him. P.T. is riding M Rufus around and whacking him with his boomerang until he forces him off the edge.
Rob: Look!
M Rob looks away and Rob shoots a spinning top at M Rob. The enemy turns around and starts firing a laser, but-
Rob: Diffusion Beam!
Short, constant lasers come from Rob’s eyes and he approaches M Rob. The lasers damage him, in addition to the attacks from Rob’s arms. M Rob is defeated. M Yux comes back for Yux, but Gadd sucks him up with his Poltergust. M Gadd’s lava-squirting Fludd melts it, but then Petey eats the clone. Fin tries to pickpocket M Fin’s pockets while M Fin does the same to Fin. They both find nothing at all. So Fin just punches M Fin, then kicks his body until it’s defeated. The heroes win! They make it back to the main room of the “Maze”.
Gadd: Look!
All the trophies are gone and the path to the door appears.
Purple: We lost a lot of time doing that, we gotta move it! Come on!
The heroes charge forward and head for
the door. This is it, the final battle. On the other side of the door is
Tabuu. Tabuu must be stopped!
Chapter 23: The Fate of the Universe
The heroes entered the Great Maze and were forced to fight monochrome copies of all the major enemies in the story (sans Tabuu) as well as clones of themselves. It was long and hard, but now all the heroes united can stop Tabuu. Will they make it in time? Who knows? They’d better.
Everyone: Huh?!
They find themselves on a long, stone path in the air in Subspace that leads to a giant sun. As they walk along the path, generic Subspace minions attack them, but they’re quickly disposed of. With little time left, the fellowship start running. They find a large castle wall with two Tabuu statues guarding the door. The statues turn to them and start charging laser orbs, but Rufus ground pounds one and Purple slices the other.
Yux: … I never used the Randomize in the last chapter!
P.T.: Yeah you did, it was in a deleted scene.
Fin: The good news, I got a burrito! The bad news, your car was stolen.
Yux: I just bought that car!
Petey: If we all have bad news, but the bad thing happens to him, isn’t it good news for us?
Before they can ponder this, the door opens and they continue up a spiral staircase that goes around the sun. It then leads to a lift that carries them up to a lava tunnel like in Super Mario Galaxy.
Luigi: Way too familiar.
After maneuvering the tunnel (the flying party members just fly across), they find another lift that leads to a final staircase. The heroes go up the stairs and make it to the top, where Tabuu greets them.
Rob: Tabuu!
Tabuu: Well, well, well… You’ve done well to make it this far… But now YOU’RE FINISHED!
Tabuu prepares to do another Off-Wave attack when suddenly a grenade appears and blows up his wings, then something falls and lands on Tabuu, knocking him down to where the group is. The person who did this is revealed.
NEWCOMER: SNAKE
The Metal Gear game over theme plays.
Everyone: Snake?
Snake: That’s right, I’m here to-
Tabuu gets back up and kicks Snake over the edge.
Luigi: Snake? Snake?! SNAAAAAAKE!
Tabuu: THAT’S IT!
Tabuu blows up the platform the group is on and they fall and land on a platform similar to the one where Tabuu was fought in Brawl.
Tabuu: I don’t have time for this! Once my Subspace Reactor is ready, it’ll go off and merge Subspace and Plit together, and I’ll be unstoppable! And you’re in my way!
Tabuu disappears and reappears somewhere else and charges up the dragon laser.
Everyone but Fin: Whoa!
They all avoid the laser, except Fin.
Fin: GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!!!
Tabuu: On second thought… How about this?
RPG BATTLE!
Purple: 200/200
Shade: 150/150
Red: 190/190
Vs.
Tabuu: 1,000/1,000
Purple uses Thundaga. 20 damage!
Shade uses Skating Tackle. 5 damage!
Red uses Fireball Storm. 25 damage!
Tabuu uses Whip Chain on Red. 30 damage!
Purple: 200/200
Shade: 150/150
Red: 160/190
Vs.
Tabuu: 950/1,000
Purple switches Shade out for Luigi.
Purple uses Thunder Axe. 10 damage!
Luigi uses Negative Zone. Luigi: ZA
WARUDO!!! Tabuu is frozen in time.
Luigi uses Multi Thunderhands. 5 hits!
50 damage! Luigi: WRYYYY!!! Tabuu is mobile again!
Red uses Flame Shell. 20 damage!
Tabuu uses Golden Brackets on Purple.
40 damage!
Purple: 160/200
Luigi: 170/170
Red: 160/190
Vs.
Tabuu: 870/1,000
Purple switches Red out for P.T.
Purple uses Thunderstorm. 10 damage!
Luigi uses Knockback Bros. with Purple.
30 damage!
P.T. uses Coney Island Disco Palace!
Tabuu can barely stand the funk! 40 damage!
Tabuu uses Off-Waves. Luigi and P.T.
are defeated! Purple dodges!
Purple: 160/200
Luigi: 0/170
P.T.: 0/190
Vs.
Tabuu: 870/1,000
Purple switches Luigi and P.T. out for
Gadd and Rob.
Purple, Gadd, and Rob use Trinity Thunder.
75 damage!
Tabuu uses Dragon Laser on Gadd. Gadd
is defeated!
Purple: 160/200
Gadd: 0/120
Rob: 190/190
Vs.
Tabuu: 795/1,000
Purple switches Gadd out for Petey.
Purple uses Thundaga. 20 damage!
Petey uses Cannonball Succession. 60
damage!
Rob uses Diffusion Beam. 40 damage!
Tabuu uses Whip Chain on Purple. 30
damage!
Purple: 130/200
Petey: 200/200
Rob: 190/190
Vs.
Tabuu: 675/1,000
Purple uses Martial Arts on Tabuu. 15
damage!
Petey uses Cannonball Succession. 60
damage!
Rob uses Gyromite. 5 damage!
Tabuu uses Spear Dive on Rob. Rob is
defeated!
Purple: 160/200
Petey: 200/200
Rob: 0/190
Vs.
Tabuu: 595/1,000
Purple switches Rob out for Red.
Purple uses Nature Stomp with Petey
and Red. 100 damage!
Tabuu uses Clone Launch on Petey. 60
damage!
Purple: 160/200
Petey: 140/200
Red: 160/190
Vs.
Tabuu: 495/1,000
Purple uses Curaga on himself. Purple
regains 20 HP!
Petey uses Cannonball Succession. 60
damage!
Red uses Flame Shell. 20 damage!
Tabuu uses Dragon Laser on Petey. 120
damage!
Purple: 150/200
Petey: 20/200
Red: 160/190
Vs.
Tabuu: 415/1,000
Purple uses an Ultra Shroom Shake on
Petey. Petey regains 50 HP!
Petey uses Nature Stomp with Purple
and Red. 75 damage!
Tabuu uses Whip Chain on Purple. 30
damage!
Purple: 120/200
Petey: 70/200
Red: 160/190
Vs.
Tabuu: 340/1,000
Purple switches Red out for Fin.
Purple uses Thundaga. 20 damage!
Petey uses Goop Ball. 25 damage!
Fin uses Steal. Fin steals 20 HP and
gives it to Red. Red regains 20 HP!
Red used Fireball Storm. 25 damage!
Tabuu uses Dragon Laser on Fin. 120
damage!
Purple: 150/200
Fin: 25/145
Red: 180/190
Vs.
Tabuu: 250/1,000
Purple uses Curaga on Fin. Fin regains
20 HP!
Fin uses Steal. Fin steals 15 HP and
uses it on himself. Fin regains 15 HP!
Red uses Fire Breath. 30 damage!
Tabuu uses Whip Chain on Purple. 30
damage!
Purple: 90/200
Fin: 60/145
Red: 180/190
Vs.
Tabuu: 205/1,000
Purple uses Quick Slash with Fin. 40
damage!
Red uses Thunder and Fire with Purple.
60 damage!
Tabuu uses Dragon Laser on Fin. Fin
is defeated!
Purple: 120/200
Fin: 0/145
Red: 180/190
Vs.
Tabuu: 105/1,000
Purple switches Fin and Red out for
Rufus and Yux.
Purple uses Thundaga. 20 damage!
Rufus uses Ground Pound. 6 hits! 60
damage!
Yux uses Flame Burp. 20 damage!
Tabuu uses Clone Launch on Yux. 60
damage!
Purple: 120/200
Rufus: 180/180
Yux: 80/140
Vs.
Tabuu: 5/1,000
Purple: Aha!
Purple uses Axe on Tabuu. Tabuu is
defeated!
You won!
BATTLE OVER!
Tabuu is twitching around in pain.
Purple: We beat you!
P.T.: Thank you, Axem Obvious.
Purple: …
Tabuu: GRRAAAAAA!!!
Tabuu explodes! … But something’s not right… He’s reforming! He’s now the same as he was, only black and white striped (horizontal stripes).
Tabuu: YOU THOUGHT YOU’VE BEATEN ME?! YOU’VE JUST UNLEASHED MY MOST POWERFUL FORM!
Everyone: D’oh!
Tabuu: NOW MY REACTOR IS ALMOST READY! SO LONG, FOOLS!
Tabuu flies off to the sun.
P.T.: He looks different. Did he get a haircut?
Purple: Oh no! Uh, quick! Let’s see that laptop!
He takes the laptop from Luigi and goes to the video on Youtube that Gadd mentioned. Shortly…
Purple: GAH! I’VE BEEN RICK ROLLED!
Gadd: Ha!
Luigi: You told us it would help!
Gadd: Yeah, I lied. But it was funny, wasn’t it?
Petey: It was.
Yux: Are you insane?!
Fin: Shut up, Yux.
Yux: I hate you all!
Purple: Tabuu is headed straight for that sun to set off his Subspace Reactor, and we’re arguing over stupid things! We need to get over there and stop him!
Shade: I never get any action! I came on this adventure so I could have an adventure with Purple I started this with him! So I’m ending it with him! But how do we get there?
Red and Rob: Can we come?
Purple: No, it’s too dangerous.
Rufus: … I have an idea on how to get there, but I’m not gonna like it…
Purple: The world’s at stake, man! Just do it!
Rufus: All right! I’m gonna have to wash my mouth in the morning.
Rufus eats Purple and Shade, aims, and spits them out at the sun. They fly through a hole in the sun and land on a glass-like platform in the center with 6 blue plates and some weird hot thing inside.
Tabuu: YOU THOUGHT YOU COULD STOP ME?! YOUR GAMES WILL END!
Shade: GAAAH! WHAT DO WE DO?!
Purple: I don’t know… Uh, beat him up!
Tabuu throws dark orbs at the duo, but Purple’s axe deflects them like Link fighting Ganondorf. Tabuu and Purple knock them back and forth a few times until Tabuu is hit. Purple leaps up and sends him to the core they’re on with a strike, and Shade does a roundhouse kick. Tabuu gets back up and uses his Whip Chain and grabs Purple, thus Purple drops his axe.
Purple: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!! HELP!
Shade picks up the axe and leaps up, and cuts the whip and drops the axe. Purple releases himself and then uses the whip attack on Tabuu, but Tabuu’s too strong for it and he drags Purple around. Shade grabs Purple and tries to pull him back, starting a tug-of-war. Purple finds his axe that Shade dropped and throws it at Tabuu. The attack distracts the humanoid and Purple and Shade manage to win the tug-of-war, causing Tabuu to crash into a blue plate, breaking it. He then flies up in pain because of the lava under the plate.
Tabuu: AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!
Tabuu then shoots energy needles. Purple and Shade run around the whole reactor core and the needle storm follows, making tiny holes in the blue plates.
Shade: Look, the needles damaged the plates! If we can get one good attack in on each of them, we’ll break them all!
Purple: … And that could cause the Reactor to explode, thus fail in destroying Plit?
Shade: I think!
Purple turns around, holds his axe over his head, and slashes it down, chopping up one plate. Two out of six are broken. Tabuu turns, changes to spearhead form, and crashes down, making shockwaves. Purple and Shade jump over them and Shade jumps and grabs one of Tabuu’s legs and tries to drag him down, but Tabuu kicks him off. Purple desperately hacks away at one plate when he gets trapped in two brackets. The brackets start crushing him when Shade takes them off and breaks them over his knee.
Purple: Someone has to distract him! We’ll never stop it in time!
???: YEEEEEEEEEEEE-HAAAW!!!
Yux, P.T., Fin, Luigi, Rufus, Red, Gadd, Rob, and Petey all ride in on a Banzai Bill that crashes into Tabuu.
Petey: I told you it would work!
Rufus: Okay, you’re right, I’m sorry!
Purple: Guys, you’re here?
Luigi: We’re not letting you take all the credit!
Purple: Okay. Some of you guys distract Tabuu, the rest of us break all the blue plates!
Tabuu gets up and starts launching clones, but Petey dodges and shoots a cannonball at Tabuu, then looks down and spits one at the blue plate near him. Half of them are taken care of! Rufus sticks his tongue out and it latches onto Tabuu. Luigi, Rob, Gadd, and Fin all pull Rufus in another tug-of-war.
P.T.: Hammer time!
P.T. swings his golden hammer and breaks one plate. Red does a shell toss and hits Tabuu, and when he turns around and goes for another, Yux breathes fire on Tabuu so he’ll be distracted. Tabuu’s knocked a few feet away, as the shell breaks a plate, and then launches up in pain, but is still relatively close to the ground due to Rufus’s tongue. P.T., Yux, Red, and Shade all join the tug-of-war and Petey picks up whoever’s in the back and swings him around, causing the whole tug-of-war situation to spin around and around. Purple leaps up and slashes Tabuu. Rufus lets go and Tabuu crashes down and breaks the last plate.
Purple: You’re finished!
Suddenly the core shakes.
Red: What happened?!
Gadd: The Reactor’s going to blow, we gotta get out of here!
Rob: We don’t have that much time!
Purple: Uh, Yux! Randomize!
Yux: All right, fine! But just so you know, since it’s the end of the story, the good news and bad news will both be extremely good and bad.
Everyone: DO IT!
Yux: FINE! SUPER LAST CHAPTER RANDOMIZE!
Yux glows all the colors of the rainbow, then stops.
Yux: The super extra good news is that we can escape and the world just might be restored!
A gold version of Bowser Jr’s personal airship lowers down and everyone gets on it and it starts flying away.
Yux: The super extra bad news…
On the core, Tabuu wakes up and starts shooting lasers at the ship.
Everyone: AAAAHH!
Shade: We’re not gonna make it!
Purple: … Someone has to stop him…
Tabuu’s new black wings appear and he flies toward the ship. Purple starts glowing as if he broke a Smash Ball.
Purple: It’s time… Shade!
Shade: What? And why are you-
Purple: No time. Shade, I want you to have my axe.
Shade: But-
Purple: Shade…
Shade: … Fine. But why?
Purple: Uhh, how about to save us all?
Yux: Duh.
Shade: Shut up, Yux.
Purple gets up on the rail and leaps off the ship.
Tabuu: (Japanese: I DO NOT DIE! IT WILL NOT DIE!)
Purple: FALCON PUNCH!
Purple (Falcon) Punches Tabuu right in the face, defeating Tabuu.
Everyone Else: Purple!
Tabuu: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH……
Tabuu is defeated as the Core explodes.
The explosion destroys the sun and the Reactor, Tabuu… and Purple. The
ship flies out of the Reactor area, out the door in the “Maze”, and out
of the light ball and back into Subspace. Then the whole area glows brightly
and you can’t see anything at all.
Epilogue: Aftermath
Shade, Yux, P.T., Fin, Luigi, Rufus, Red, Gadd, Rob, and Petey all find themselves in Flipside.
Shade: Huh?
Rob: Where are we?
Red: What happened?
Merlon: When you destroyed Subspace, you were sent here. Congratulations, you saved your world!
P.T.: Awesome!
Shade: Wait, where’s Purple?
Merlon: He wasn’t here. I’m sorry to tell you this… but his game is over. I saw it… on my magic Plasma Screen TV.
Fin: Wow, I’m totally going to steal that!
Merlon: What was that?
Fin: … Nothing.
Shade: Purple’s… dead?
Merlon: Yes, he used the Falcon Punch that I taught him to save you!
Yux: Since when do you know the Falcon Punch?
Merlon: Shut up, Yux. Anyway, I’m sorry for your loss. Kinda. Not really. Time for you to go back home. SHAZAM!
Merlon warps them all back to Plit. They’re just outside Gadd’s lab.
Gadd: My house! It’s back to normal! Well that was fun. Kind of. Get off my property.
Gadd goes into his house.
Petey: Well I gotta be going to. Good seeing you again, Shade. Kinda. Didn’t really pay attention.
Petey flies away.
Luigi: I gotta tell everyone about what I just helped with!
Luigi runs off.
P.T.: I’m bored.
P.T. walks away.
Rob: I’m gonna go make sure something like this never happens again. Goodbye!
Shady Parakoopa: THERE YOU ARE!
Yux: Oh no!
Shady: We’ve been looking all over for you, Yux! Come back now, we need our plunger.
Yux: Stop using me as a pl-
Shady: Shut up, Yux.
Yux: … I HATE YOU ALL!
Shady drags Yux away and out of my submissions. Fin puts on his red Bandit cloak over his blue one.
Fin: Well, break time’s over. Bye.
Fin runs off.
Rufus: If us Yoshis were celebrating Bowser’s death, I can’t wait until they hear about this. I’m gonna tell them.
Rufus runs off to Yoshi’s Island.
Red: Woo! There is no way I need to take any adventures ever again… By that I mean until next week. Bye! Thanks for saving me, I guess.
Shade: … Well I wanted an adventure of my own… I got half of one. No, not even half, one quarter! I got one quarter of an adventure. Oh well. I think an adventure and a fourth are enough for this Shy Guy…
Shade then starts walking away.
Each character’s fates:
Purple: Died saving the world and the others from Tabuu.
Shade: Built a memorial for Purple and decided to settle down somewhere and try to find a girlfriend.
Yux: Continued to be treated like mud. He honestly can’t tell which is worse, the way he’s treated normally, or the way he was treated in this story.
P.T.: Continued interviewing and stuff like that.
Fin: Kept stealing things, but wasn’t very good at it. In fact he might be the worst thief ever. But he never quit trying, mostly because he’s kind of stupid.
Luigi: Nobody believed Luigi when he told people what he did, so he went to Rogueport to tell them and they made a novel series out of that just like his Waffle Kingdom adventure. The movie will be in theaters nowhere near you.
Rufus: Rufus became a hero among the Yoshis and continued partying all night and sleeping all day.
Red: Red soon started adventuring again. Last time anybody heard, he was going to explore that one island that nobody cares about.
Gadd: Gadd continued to be a semi-mad scientist who assists good guys.
Rob: Rob joined a bowling team that wasn’t evil. They won 3rd place in the nationals.
Petey: He just continued with his usual lifestyle.
The Bowling Team of Doom: Grubba, Bill Gates, Waluigi, and Ballyhoo were never heard from again.
The Shroobs: The Shroobs were sick of failing to conquer Plit, so they decided to attack another world. I’m looking at you, Mobius…
Merlon: Merlon continued being Merlon.
Fiery Dino Piranha: He wasn’t seen again, it’s believed he may have choked to death.
Everyone Else: Nothing really noteworthy.
The End
-Credit for the character “Yux” goes to Shady Parakoopa.
~In memory of Axem Purple, who died in a parody of a Youtube joke.
| If you would like to send some feedback
to the author of this submission, please complete this form.
What's your name?
What's your Email address?
How do you rate this submission?
Does this submission belong in Little
Lemmy's Land?
Would you like to see more from this author? Comments and suggestions:
|
