Average Mario Galaxy

By P.T. Piranha

Loopdeloop Galaxy:

Mario lands on a watery track with penguins.

Mario: Shouldn’t you be in a cold place?

Penguins: Don’t tell us what to do!

Coach Penguin: If you can beat the hard track within a time limit, you’ll get the Star!

Mario: What’s that?

Coach Penguin: Where?

Mario takes the Star as the coach looks away.

Coach Penguin: Why you…! After him!

Mario: Uh oh.

Mario hops on a Ray and takes off. The penguins get on their own Rays and follow.

Luma: You had to steal it! How do we lose them?

Mario: I know! But it’ll be risky!

Mario jumps at a part where he has to turn, and lands on another part of the track. The front-most penguins try to imitate that but fall to their deaths. The other penguins play it safe and turn. Mario moves around a palm tree in the water, inches away from hitting it, and a few penguins crash into that and land in the water. The other penguins flying on Rays fly by so fast, the crashed penguins are thrown into the air, bouncing along the track until they fall off at a turn.

Mario: Well that’s all my tricks. Now they’ll expect that kind of stuff! Time for the secret move!

Mario turns and shoots Star Bits at the penguins, but they knock them away with their flippers. Mario decides to aim for the Rays themselves, and hit their eyes, blinding them and causing them to go crazy and accidentally fall over the edges with the penguins on them.

Coach: If you want it done right, you have to do it yourself!

The coach gets on a Ray and blazes through the track. Literally, the first part of the track is now steam. Mario was already at the end when the coach started, and after the whole track is steam, Coach lands on the end platform.

Coach: Now you must pay for taking the shiny and killing off all my students!

Mario: Wait, what’s that other thing?

Coach: Where?

He looks away and Mario pushes him over the edge.

Mario: Now that I got the penguins off my back, we can leave!
 

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