Good Guys
Mario Mario, “Jumpman”
Luigi Mario, Overshadowed Brother
Yoshi Dino, Hungry Dino
Peach Toadstool, Princess
White Lightning
Quick Bones
Toad Mushroom, Fungus
Toadette Mushroom, Female Fungus
Cerberus Yoshter, Ice Yoshi
Registeel, Legend Steel
Koops, Koopa
Bobbery, Bomb
Twink, Star Kid
Watt, Electro-Ball
Splish Yoshem, Light Blue Yoshi
Splash Yoshem, Water Yoshi.
Sploosh Yoshem, Purple Yoshi
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Bad Guys
[x]Bowser, King Koopa
Larry, Spy
Iggy, Punching Bag
Roy, Power Punch
Wendy, Female Koopa
Lemmy, LL Ruler
Morton, Blabbermouth
Ludwig, Genius
Bowser Jr, Jr.
Wart, Froggy!
King Boo, Ghost King
Big Bob-omb, Big Explosive
Petey Piranha, Walking Plant
Belome, Cloning Dog
Naval Piranha, Water Plant.
[x]Big Bungee Piranha, Purple Piranha Plant.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Minions
[x]Goomba, Low of the Low
[x]Koopa Troopa, Koopa
Boo, Boo.
Piranha Plant, Weed
Bob-omb, Dynamite
Spiny, Spike ball.
Sky-Blue Spiny, Blue Spike Ball
Stalfos, Bone Warrior.
Bombshell Bill, Golden Bullet
Banzai Bill, Big Black Blaster Bomb
Red Bones, Red… Bones
Lakutu, Spiny Chuckster
Shy Guy, Mask Man
Anti Guy, Black Guy
Baseball Boy, Hitter
Mr. Kipper, Fish.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
CRRRRRRRRRRRRRAZIES
Psycho Mario, CRAZY Hero.
Psycho Luigi, CRAZY Sidekick
Psycho Peach, CRAZY Girl
Psycho Yoshi, CRAZY Dino
Psycho Bowser, CRAZY Kidnapper
Psycho Lemmy, EXTREME CRAZY!
Psycho King Boo, CRAZY Ghost
Psycho Belome, CRAZY Eater
Psycho Lightning, CRAZY Speed
Psycho Bombshell, CRAZY Gold
Psycho Anti, CRAZY Black
Psycho Baseball, CRAZY Swinger
Psycho Spiny, CRAZY Spike
Psycho Kipper, CRAZY Sushi
Psycho Roy, CRAZY Punch
Psycho Wart, CRAZY Froggy
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Bad Guys
Larry: I’m voting you off, Susan!
Wendy: (applying makeup) She isn’t here.
Larry: I’m still voting her off!
Wendy: *animated sweatdrop* Idiot…
Naval: Is it me… or are the Good Guys riding a giant tidal wave toward us?
Wendy: That’s a tsunami, and they aren’t riding toward us.
Naval: Oh, okay.
SPOINK!
Naval: What… was that?
Wendy: A double take. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
Some time before…
Good Guys
White: Let’s ride those Goonies, just for kicks.
Present… (For
who?)(Not that kind of present!)
Good Guys
White: It’s not my fault the Goonies threw us off a cliff!
Mario: SO?!
White: So it wasn’t my fault!
Luigi: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!
White: SHUT UP.
Luigi: HOLY!
Mario: MAMAMIA!
They’re heading for sharp rocks.
White: SOMBODY STOP THIS THING!!!
All Three: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!
The same Goonies that threw them off a cliff catch them again.
All Three: THAT was too close for comfort.
The Goonies buck them off again.
All Three: NOT AGAIN!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!
Meanwhile, with the rest of the Good Guys…
Registeel: Where’s Mario?
Peach: Maybe he got thrown off a cliff.
They look at each other and laugh.
Registeel: No… seriously.
Cerberus: Just to tell you, Mario was thrown off a cliff.
Dead silence.
Peach: See, I was right.
Registeel: Oh, shut up.
Minions
Bombshell: (really fast) I’msoboredIcan’tstandit!I’msoboredIcan’tstandit!...
Banzai: BOOOOOOOOORRRREEEEEEDDDD!!!
Rest of them: BOOOOOOORRRRRRRIIIINNNNNNNGGGGGG!!!
CRRRRRRRRRRRRRAZIES!
You should know what happens.
S. White: Yoshi, okay. Belome, okay. BUT PEACH?!
Good Guys (with Mario)
Mario: That took a long time.
Luigi: Yeah.
White: No kidding.
Mario: Let’s go back to camp.
White: Hey, Goonies!
Mario: NO, Lightning!!!
White: Okay, okay, okay.
Elsewhere…
Registeel: 5… 4… 3… 2…1… 0… Welcome back, Mario.
Mario: Thank you, Registeel.
Registeel: You’re wet.
Mario: I am aware of that, Registeel.
Registeel: Just checking.
Mario: Shut up, Registeel.
Registeel: Okay.
Mario: Good, Regist-
Cerberus: Stop that.
Mario: Stop what, Cerberus?
Cerberus: FOR CRYING OUT LOUD, STOP THAT!!!
Mario: What’s wrong, Cerberus?
Cerberus: (with great restraint) You… saying… the… person… you… are… talking… to’s… name… at… the… end… of… every... stinking… sentence!
Mario: Oh, I get it now… Cerberus.
Cerberus: GRAAAAAA!!!
He mauls Mario.
Peach: No mauling allowed!
Mario (horribly beaten): Ow.
Splish: That’s all you have to say?
Mario: Yes.
This day is too long.
10 hours later…
Day 5
Good Guys
12:01 in the morning…
White: WAKE UP, EVERYONE!
Sploosh: What time is it…?
White: One minute into the day.
Splash: Why the @#$% did you wake us up now?!
White: Because, everyone else is gone!
Splash and Sploosh: What?!
White picks up a note.
White: What’s this?
He looks at it closer.
White: It’s from
Sergeant! It has the poem!
Dear
White, Splash, and Sploosh,
I have
kidnapped the others for tomorrow’s challenge. Until then you’ll
have to manage on your own. The poem is…
Something’s
coming from the sky,
You
don’t know how, you don’t know why.
You
hope you’re in a movie theater,
But
nope! Look out! Incoming Meteor!
Thank
you.
Sergeant
Dark Bones
All three look up and see a flaming ball in the sky.
All three: AHHHHHHHHHHH! A FLAMING METEOR!
White: By my calculations, it’ll hit, TOMORROW!
The Other Two: OH NOOO! Hey, just in time for the challenge.
White: Yeah. Hey, a P.S.
PS. The others are on the meteor, so stop it!
All: Say WHAAAAAAT?! Okay. WHAAAAAAT?!
They ponder what to do, when they see Blak out for a stroll.
.2 seconds later…
All three are on top of Blak.
Splash: Where’s Splish, Blak?! And the others?! Huh?! Huh?!
Blak: What the @#$% are you talking about?!
Sploosh shoves the letter in his face. His eyes widen.
Blak: Say WHAAAAAAT?! Okay. WHAAAAAAT?!
Dead silence
White: You didn’t know?
Blak: Well, obviously they are on the meteor.
The Three: … We kinda figured that out.
Blak: Anyway, I just know the challenge is Stop the Meteor.
White: How?
Blak: All SDB told me is that “To compete, you must combine.” I think I know what it means.
White: Hmmmmmmm…
Blak: I’ll be off!
Splash: Bye.
Sploosh: C-ya.
Bad Guys
Lemmy, King Boo and Petey Piranha are alone at base.
Petey: Where is everyone?
King Boo: I’ll scope the area.
King Boo flies around and finds Blak talking to White, Splish, and Sploosh.
King Boo: I wonder what they’re talking about. I’d better listen in.
Authors Note: When I have characters talk in italics, they are either thinking or reading something aloud.
King Boo phases out. He hears the following.
Blak: Say WHAAAAAAT?! Okay. WHAAAAAAT?!
Dead silence.
White: You didn’t know?
Blak: Well, obviously they are on the meteor.
The Three: … We kinda figured that out.
Blak: Anyway, I just know the challenge is Stop the Meteor.
White: How?
Blak: All SDB told me is that “To compete, you must combine.” I think I know what it means.
White: Hmmmmmmm…
Blak: I’ll be off!
Splash: Bye.
Sploosh: C-ya.
KB: What a valuable piece of information! I’d better go back.
KB goes back to camp and tells the others what he heard.
Lemmy: “To compete you must combine”? What does that mean?
Petey: It means… we have to work with the other groups.
KB and Lemmy: Say WHAAAAT?! Okay. WHAAAAT?!
Petey: We have to ask the others for help, and to stop saying that.
Minions
Boo, Baseball Boy, and Mr. Kipper are alone. At least, until KB shows up.
KB: Hi.
Boo: My king!
He kneels. (Don’t ask how.)
Boo: What are you doing here, your majesty?
KB: Capital, Boo. Always capital.
Boo: Sorry, Your Majesty.
KB tells the others what he heard, and concludes.
Boo: So you need our help?
KB: No. You need MY help.
Boo: Yes, Boss.
KB: Good.
CRRRRRRRRRRRRRAZIES!!!
S. White: I’m stuck with Yoshi and Belome! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
Live with it.
S. White: NEVAH!
KB shows up.
S. White: Thank DAD someone else is here.
KB: Shut up. You need our help.
S. White: Huh?
KB tells White everything.
P. White: I LIKE NACHOS!
KB: …
S. White: Sorry. I had a blast of insanity.
P. White: I’M NOT INSANE! WELL, ACUALLY I AM! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
S. White: I think the mind-meddling ray is malfunctioning.
P. White: MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
S. White: Yeah, it is.
Bones
SlDB is messing with the mind-meddling ray.
SlDB: MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
SDB: Are you messing with the mind-meddling ray again? Isn’t it enough to make P. White, S. White every time something really insane happens?
SlDB: No.
SDB: Okay.
Good Guys
White: Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm…
Splash: He’s been going “Hmmm…” for the last half hour. Hey! I just realized something! Why was Blak strolling at 12:25 in the morning?
Sploosh: Yeah, it’s like SDB told him to come and tell us.
Bones
Blak: They got the message, SDB.
SDB: Let’s hope they spread it.
Good Guys
Splash: I bet you’re right!
KB, Petey, Lemmy, Boo, Baseball Boy, Mr. Kipper, S. White, P. Yoshi and P. Belome come out of the woods. P. Yoshi and P. Belome are picking their noses, laughing manically
White: Hmmmmmwhatthewhyareyouheremmmmmmmmmmm…
Everyone Else: *animated sweatdrop*
White: Hmmmmm”tocompeteyoumustcombine”mmmm…
KB: Oh, yeah. We need to work together to stop the meteor.
Splash: Oh, OHHHHHH! Still don’t get it.
KB slaps himself.
White: Hmmmmmmmmwillhit2:00amtomorrowmmmmmmmm…
Baseball Boy: What?! 2:00 AM?! Tomorrow?!
Mr. Kipper: We need to get rest. It hits in 25 hours and 3 minutes from now.
They all go to bed by 1:10 AM except for White, who is still going “Hmmmmmm…”
Splash and Sploosh: Get to sleep!
White: Hmmmmmmfinemmmmmmm…
Later…
White: Hzmzmzmzmzmzmzmzmzmzmzmzmzmzmzmzmzmzmzmzmzm…
Day 6
Survivor Group
12:59 AM…
Blak: Yo, wake up.
S. White and White: SHUT UP!
Blak: Time for the challenge.
KB: Why is the sky red?
Bloo: That’s the effects of the meteor.
Petey: Woah! It’s close.
Derk: So get it away before it gets closer.
Splash: What’s in the capsules under the meteor?
SlDB: Your friends.
SDB: And Peach.
Peach (from inside one of the capsules): I HEARD THAT!!!
Splash: I thought you said they were ON the meteor!!! >:-( SPLISH! DO YOU HEAR ME?!
A Voice Nearby: Yes.
Splash whirls around and sees more capsules. Splash sees Splish’s face inside the closest one.
Splash: Splish!
Splish: Splash!
Sploosh: Splish!
Splish: Sploosh!
White: Splish!
Splish: Lightning!
SDB: Sergeant!
White: Not that again…
SDB: We haven’t had that running gag in our Fun Fic yet.
Gag: I’m still running!
SDB: … Or that one…
SlDB: The meteor…
SDB: ... Oh yeah! To do this challenge, you must combine yourselves to carry the capsules. Each capsule is too heavy for 3, 6, even 9 people to carry it! You need 12 people to carry each capsule into the shelter on all four sides of the valley. Once there, you can drop off the people in the capsules. Once all are in the shelters, we release them and give each mass a rocket launcher. The two masses that manage to hit the meteor away win immunity. If the meteor hits, the trapped players all will be booted off the island. However, rescued players will be immune if their mass loses. Masses have to fire in pairs. The rocket launchers also have different power levels, so beware of that. Go.
The group immediately heads for the capsule nearest to the east shelter. To everyone’s horror, the insane psychos don’t pick it up!
White: Hey, I’ll give you candy if you help us.
Psychos: CANDY!
The psychos pick the capsule up, and they all head for the shelter.
Toad: Thank you 12, but the princess is in another capsule!
All: …
They go and grab the rest of the capsules until there is only one left. And it is on a little island in a pond.
Belome: GET ME OUT!
The 12 swim across, pick up the capsule, and walk across the bottom of the pond with it.
Baseball Boy: Blub blub glub! (I can’t breathe!)
Mr. Kipper: I’m just fine.
White: Duh, you’re a fish. Me, I’m weak against water. I can hardly walk.
Mr. Kipper: But you can talk. A lot.
White: So can you.
The 12 get out of the water.
SDB: 30 minutes ‘til collision.
White: It’ll take at least 10 minutes to carry this over! Come on, guys! I’ll give you candies and cakes if you work harder!
20 seconds later…
White: We already made it?!
Boo: Give us the candy. And cakes. Now.
White gives them all candy. And cakes.
Bloo: Door OFF!
All the doors on the capsules open.
Blak: Shoulder rockets!
Rocket launchers are passed out.
All of the Bones: FIRE!
All fire.
SDB: Let’s use the scrambler to see who shoots!
Good-Crazy
SDB: Good Guys, CRRRRRRRRRRRRRAZIES!!!.
The Good and Crazy people (Yes, there is a difference. A small one, though.) shoot.
Bad-Crazy
Good-Minion
Bad-Minion
Bad-Minion
Good-Minion
Good-Minion
Bad-Crazy
SDB: The meteor flies away! Bad Guys and CRRRRRRRRRRRRRAZIES!!! WIN!
Minions: And we did most of the work…
SDB: Too bad. The 12 are immune though.
The 12: Yes!
Good Guys
The Good Guys anxiously await Mass Massacre.
Mario: It is getting boring, anxiously waiting for Mass Massacre.
Luigi: Yes, I agree, it is getting boring, anxiously waiting for Mass Massacre.
White: (singing) I’m free from Mass Massacre! I’m free from Mass Massacre!
Yoshi: Good for White. Yoshi not. Not good for Yoshi.
Cerberus: How come he talks Yoshi but I don’t?
Bobbery: Maybe because you are a white Yoshi.
Cerberus: I need to start. Cerberus needs to start, that is.
White: It’s a start, Cerberus. It’s a start.
Cerberus: Cerberus thank White.
White Lightning, Quick Bones: Dang, I thought I could trick him.
Cerberus, Ice Yoshi: Cerberus heard that.
Minions
The minions are not happy.
Minions (Minus Baseball Boy, Mr. Kipper, and Boo): GRAAAAAAAAAAAAAHH!!! WHY?! WHY?! WHY DID CRAZY PEOPLE WIN?!
Baseball Boy, Mr. Kipper, and Boo: We’re free from Mass Massacre! We’re free from Mass Massacre! We’re free from Mass Massacre! We’re free from Mass Massacre!
Bombshell Bill: Don’t rub it in.
Baseball Boy, Mr. Kipper, and Boo: NEVAH!!! We’re free from Mass Massacre! We’re free from Mass Massacre! We’re free from Mass Massacre! We’re free from Mass Massacre!
Bombshell Bill flies into BB, Mr. K, and Boo.
BB, Mr. K, and Boo: OW!
Banzai: You had it coming.
Bad Guys
All: BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! We won the immunity challenge!!!
CRRRRRRRRRRRRRAZIES!!!
All (except S.
White): GRAGAGAGAGAGAHAHAHABABABAAAAAAABABABA
MAMAMAMAMAMAMAMAHAHAHAHAJAJAJAJAJAJAYAYAYAYAYAPAPAP
APAPAPAPAOAOAOAOAAOAOAOAQAQAQAQAQAQAQAUAUAUAUAUAUA
UAKCAKCAKCAKCAKCAKCALALALALALALATATATATAIAIAIAIAWAWAW
ARARARARA!!!!!11111oneoneoneone
S. White: SAVE ME!!!
Obviously SlDB is still making him the sane one in the insane moments.
Good Guys
Everyone is silent.
White, Splash, and Sploosh: We’re free from Mass Massacre! We’re free from Mass Massacre! We’re free from Mass Massacre!
Well, not everyone.
All except White, Splash, Splish and Sploosh: SHUT THE @#$%^&*()-+=_ UP!!!
White Splash Sploosh: ( )_( )
Splish: Zzz… Zzz… Zzz…
All except Splish: …
Peach: How… is… he sleeping?
Toadette: Hey, I think this is my first line.
Registeel looks through the script.
Registeel: Yeah, it is… Hey, it says who’s being voted off! It’s-
SDB: DON’T SAY IT!!!
SDB mauls Registeel via machine gun.
SDB: Don’t let me catch you reading the script again!
Toad: What’s with your voice?
SDB: I was up writing all night. :( I am sooooooooo tired.
SlDB: Hey, Ser! I’ve got your non-tired pills.
SDB eats the pills.
SDB: Better. Wait- OH **** NO! AAARRRRRGGGHHHH!
SlDB: Oops. Wrong pills. Here they are!
SDB rips off SlDB’s hand with the pills on them and eats them.
SDB: Finally. Come to Mass Massacre, losers, and Blak. Might as well witness the fun!
Mario: Pssst! Luigi! Vote for… *whisper, whisper*
Luigi: But he’s our friend!
Mario: Vote for him because *whisper, whisper*
Luigi: Oh, I see!
Mario: White is too.
Luigi: Anyone else?
Mario shrugs.
On the other side…
Peach: …And that is why we must vote for that person!
Toad, Yoshi, Twink, and Watt: Okay!
Yoshi, Hungry Dino: Yoshi no know why Yoshi didn’t think of that!
Over by Registeel…
Registeel: So that is why he must go.
Cerberus, Toadette, Koops, and Bobbery: Gotcha!
MASS MASSACRE!
SDB: Nice touch. Okay, you know what to do… Wait, I forgot to mention this: being voted off is more painful the later you are voted off. Observe!
The Good Guys see a super high-powered cannon and a thick, steel bar in firing range.
SDB: If you get voted off you will fly through that bar. And I mean THROUGH!
Mario, “Jumpman”: And this is only Stage Two out of… THIRTY-ONE?!
SDB: Nice thinking. Vote NOW!
Everyone votes.
SDB: That was quick.
Vote 1 Splish
Mar
Vote 2 Splish
Lui
Vote 3 Splish
Pea
Vote 4 Admiral
Bobbery Spli
Vote 5 Bobbery
Spla
Vote 6 Bobbery
Splo
Vote 7 Twink
Reg
Vote 8 Twink
Cer
Vote 9 Twink
Toadet
Vote 10 Twink
Koops
Vote 11 Twink
Bobb
Vote 12 Splish
Toa
Vote 13… ah,
forget this. The rest are Splish.
SDB: Hem hem. Splish, Twink, BBFN!
All: …
SDB: Sry.
All: …
SDB: What?
All: Shut up.
SDB: NEVAH! Okay, Splish, Twink, crack your sticks!
Splish cracks it on Bobbery. Twink does it on Splish.
SDB: Get in the cannons.
They get in the cannons. SDB lights the fuse.
SDB: Splish, Twink, the Mass has spoken. Bye.
The two of them fly out of the cannons and into the bars. They fall down.
SDB: Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat? Oops, wrong fuse. Get in the cannons again.
They do, after they are dragged in.
SDB: Good-BYE!
This time they fly out of the cannons and through the bar. A few minutes later in a galaxy far, far away…
Splish: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!
Twink: HEEEEEEEEELLLLLPPP!!!
The two are being chased by Darth Vader and several Stormtroopers.
Splish: THIS STINKS!!!
Back at Base…
MASS MASSACRE! 2!
Bob-omb: ALL YOUR BASE! ALL YOUR BASE! ALL YOUR BASE ARE BELONG TO US!
Sky-Blue Spiny (S-B Spiny): Why did you do that?
Bob-omb: The script told me to!
S-B Spiny: …
SlDB: Get this straight…
He tells him about the pain thing, then everyone votes.
Later…
Stalfos-7
Lakitu-5
Anti Guy-1
Shy Guy-1
Later…
Stalfos cracks his on Anti Guy and Lakitu cracks his on Shy Guy.
Later…
Stalfos and Lakitu: OWWW! That bar stopped me!
SlDB: Oops…
Later…
SlDB: Go back to your home. This is over.
Who voted for
whom?
Mario, Luigi,
White- Splish (Weaken Splash’s side)
Peach, Twink,
Watt, Yoshi, Toad- Splish (See above)
Registeel, Koops,
Bobbery, Toadette, Cerberus- Twink (Might have annoying “Star gifts”)
Splish, Splash,
Sploosh-Bobbery (Get rid of the strongest)
Piranha Plant,
Bob-omb, Spiny, S-B Spiny, Boo, Bombshell Bill, Banzai Bill-Stalfos (Want
to get rid of all Legend of Zelda references, and because I made them)
Red Bones, Shy
Guy, Anti Guy, BB, Mr. Kip-Lakitu (Popular Demand. MY popular demand)
Stalfos-Anti
Guy (Get rid of him, and because I made him)
Lakitu-Shy Guy
(Got mixed up when Stalfos told him who to vote for)
Splish, Light Blue Yoshi: This stinks. I wanted to go far with my brothers, but NOOOOOO! I get a lightsaber stuck in my back!
Twink, Star Kid: I can’t even show my FACE in Star Haven now.
SDB: GOOD!
Stalfos, Bone Warrior: My friends all died. I have no one to go back to.
Lakitu, Spiny Chuckster: All my Spinies are in competitions. I have no one to go back to chuck.
Good for you!
Bye! See you again. Or else.
To Be Continued...
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