Mario and company arrive at Peach’s castle.
Mario: You wait here.
Ludwig: But we need to get inside the castle.
Toad: Why?
Larry: Ludwig’s wife, Karma, has a deadly disease called Koopa-Litus. There’s an elixir inside the castle called the Koopa Elixir, and it’s the only thing that can save her.
Mario: Okay, but I can’t get you inside. You have to figure out a way to get inside yourself.
Luigi walks over.
Luigi: Hiya!
Toad: Where’s Billy?
Luigi: I couldn’t get him.
Mario: Why?
Luigi: Because the narrator is picking on me!
Iggy: Don’t be such a wuss. What could he do to you?
Luigi: Don’t mess with the narrator. He might get mad.
Iggy: Right. Hey Narrator! Take your best shot!
Okay. Iggy, if you look up, you will see a giant section of castle above you. Now, notice how the wall is now falling directly on top of you.
Crash!
Iggy: Ack… Medic…
Mario: So how do we get Billy?
Iggy: The same way that I got attacked…
Toad: So you’re saying that we should tell Yoshi to insult the narrator, and then we snatch Billy when Yoshi is down?
Iggy: Exactly!
Mario: We will do that, then. All right, gang, move out!
Everyone but the three Koopalings now leaves.
Ludwig: How do we get inside?
Larry: Maybe there’s a back entrance.
They run to the back, and they see that it’s a giant shopping mall. Mushroomers are entering and leaving the building.
Larry: Woah.
To their dismay, they see a guard, and beside the guard, there’s a sign that says “No Bowser, no Bowser Jr, and definitely no Koopalings allowed!”
Ludwig: Great. It will be REALLY difficult to get inside now.
Iggy: Actually, it will be very easy for me to get inside. You two will have some problems, though.
Larry: Why will it be easy for you?
Iggy walks up to the entrance, and starts having a conversation with the guard. From Ludwig and Larry’s view, they see the two laughing about something. A minute later, he lets Iggy through.
Larry: What? How did he do that?!
Ludwig: Maybe we can do the same thing.
The two of them approach the guard.
Guard: Hey! Didn’t you read the sign? No Koopalings allowed!
Ludwig: But you let Iggy in!
Guard: I don’t care what I did. Beat it!
Ludwig and Larry run behind a corner.
Larry: Now what?
Ludwig: We climb through the window!
There is a window above them.
Larry: It’s too high.
Ludwig: Don’t worry, I have a foldable ladder!
He pulls out a foldable ladder.
Larry: Great! Set it up.
Ludwig sets the ladder up.
Larry: I’ll go first.
Larry climbs up to the window, and then jumps in. Ludwig climbs, but after the first step, it breaks.
Larry: Stop eating so much!
Ludwig: It’s not my fault that chocolate has so much chocolaty goodness!
Larry rolls his eyes, and then throws a rope down. Ludwig starts climbing while Larry holds the rope.
Larry: Ug! How much do you weigh? 300 pounds?
Ludwig: 302 pounds, duh!
Ludwig makes it to the top. Then they start walking, and end up in a hallway shaped like this: * (Ludwig and Larry are in the hallway pointing straight down.)
Ludwig: Um…
Larry: Process of elimination!
They start going clockwise, and the first hallway is empty. The second hallway is the toy store.
Larry: Yay! Toys!
Ludwig: Later.
The third hallway (oops, looks like Larry tripped down the stairs) is the janitor’s closet.
Larry: That narrator is mean.
It just shows how great I am.
Larry: …
The fourth hallway is the science store.
Ludwig: Yay! Science!
Larry: Later.
The fifth hallway (the only hallway that has not been examined) leads to a set of stairs. At the top of the stairs, there is another set of hallways shaped like this: + (Larry and Ludwig are on the hallway pointing straight down.)
Ludwig: Um…
Larry: Process of elimination!
They go counter-clockwise, and the first hallway leads to the biggest clothing store in the universe. For some reason a big chunk of the store is missing. One wrong step and you could fall out of the building!
Ludwig: What’s with the hole in the wall?
Larry: That was the wall that fell on Iggy earlier.
And that happened because of yours truly! Bwa ha ha ha! Anyway, the second hallway holds the comic book store. They see Iggy inside.
Iggy: How much for this one?
Sales Clerk: 50 coins. Or you could trade a rare comic book for it.
Iggy: How about this?
He holds up a comic book.
Sales Clerk: Perfect!
They trade, and then Iggy notices Larry and Ludwig.
Iggy: Hi!
Larry: How did you get in?
Iggy: I’m a frequent customer! Everyone who works here knows who I am.
Ludwig: …
Larry: Let’s go.
The trio move into the third (and last) hallway, which leads into the castle itself. On a shelf in the distance, they see the Koopa Elixir.
Ludwig: Lucky!
They grab it.
Larry: Shine Get! Er, I mean Elixir Get!
Iggy: Right.
Ludwig: Anyway, we should get going.
Meanwhile, Mario, Luigi, and Toad find Yoshi.
Toad: Yoshi! Mail!
Yoshi: For me? Yay! Ok, let’s see: “Dear Yoshi, you will get something good if you insult the narrator. From, Peach”.
Mario: (to Luigi) I had to make it convincing.
Yoshi: What a narrator?
Everyone but Yoshi: …
You’ve done it now.
An army of Shy Guys appear out of nowhere and trample Yoshi.
Yoshi: Ouch.
Mario, Luigi, and Toad grab Billy and run as fast as they can to Peach’s castle.
Yoshi: Should’ve seen it coming.
Back at Peach’s castle, Larry sees Mario, Luigi, and Toad with Billy in their hands.
Larry: Hi!
Mario: We got Billy back.
Ludwig: Thanks. I’ll never forget this.
???: I hope I will!
A giant robot looms over them. Bowser is controlling it.
Bowser: Send the child and the Elixir up here and I will let you live!
Mario: Not if I can help it!
Mario and the robot start fighting each other. Meanwhile Lemmy, Morton, and Roy appear.
Lemmy: Aren’t so tough now!
Morton: Just give up!
Roy: I’m gonna punch your face in!
Iggy prepares to throw his boomerang.
Lemmy: Never mind!
Morton: Bye bye!
Roy: Sorry we were such nuisances!
Morton and Roy run away. Lemmy merely sits on a rock. Iggy sits beside him, and they both watch Mario and the robot fight.
Iggy: How’s your website?
Lemmy: Wonderful. There’s this great author named Larry the Tennis Master, and he’s making these great stories.
Iggy: Right. They can’t be that great.
The ground falls underneath Iggy and he falls down 20 feet.
Iggy: I should have known.
Mario is trying desperately to find a weakness in Bowser’s robot, but it seems unstoppable.
Bowser: Bwa ha ha! I cannot be defeated!
Mario looks to the side and sees Lemmy pulling Iggy out of the newly created hole.
Mario: How did you fall into that hole?
Iggy: I insulted the narrator again.
Mario: Of course! Bowser! Did you know there’s a more powerful being than you?
Bowser: What? Who is this person?
Mario: The narrator.
Bowser: Ha! Who is this narrator that is stronger than me?
Hey Bowser, if you look above you, you will see a large number of boulders falling directly toward you.
Bowser: UH OH.
The boulders completely demolish the robot, and Bowser is now completely squished.
Bowser: Ow.
Ludwig: Bowser, we need to settle this right now.
Ludwig is staring at the squashed Bowser.
Bowser: You mean this Billy business?
Ludwig: Yes. Why do you disapprove?
Bowser: Because Karma is a Yoshi.
Ludwig: No, Karma is a Yoshi-Koopa. Aren’t you supposed to love me no matter what?
Bowser: But I’ve always hated you.
Ludwig rolls his eyes.
Larry: Bowser, Ludwig is merely passing on the family name, something that none of your other children can do.
Bowser: I suppose I’ve been a little rough on you guys. And you were only following your instincts…
Larry: What are you talking about?
Iggy: Bowser, you haven’t had that “birds and the bees and how your instincts are influenced by them” talk with Larry yet, have you?
Bowser: I was going to do that today…
Larry: ?
Iggy: It’s something you’re too young to understand.
Larry: I’m left out of everything.
Everyone laughs, except for Larry. Then the Koopa family leaves.
Luigi: How emotional.
Yoshi appears out of nowhere.
Yoshi: Yoshi see whole thing. I sorry.
Mario: That’s ok. But you should get the facts before you do something stupid.
Toad: Besides, if you want a child, all you have to do is eat a Shy Guy and poof! An egg will pop out. Look, there’s a random Shy Guy over there.
Random Shy Guy: EEK!
He runs away.
Yoshi: By the way, what is narrator?
A boulder falls on Yoshi.
Yoshi: Maybe Yoshi should stop asking that question.
Meanwhile, at Bowser’s Castle…
Ludwig: Karma! We did it! We got Billy and the Elixir!
Ludwig sees a Karma-shaped skeleton on her bed.
Ludwig: EEK!
Ludwig faints.
Karma: Ha!
Karma, Larry, Iggy, and Kamek jump out of nowhere.
Ludwig: …
Kamek: I thought it was funny.
Kamek leaves.
Karma: You got the Elixir and Billy? I’m so proud!
Iggy: Hey! I helped!
Larry and Ludwig roll their eyes.
Karma: Well, I guess the only problem now is Bowser…
Ludwig: Don’t worry, he won’t do anything bad to us anymore. I talked him out of it.
Iggy: Yeah, hypnotism works well!
Larry: Thanks, peanut gallery.
Ludwig: I didn’t hypnotize him. He actually doesn’t mind. Though we still shouldn’t tick him off, or he’ll get mad.
Iggy: Like the narrator when I call him stupid… EEP!
The ground underneath Iggy breaks, and he falls 300 meters.
Iggy: Should’ve seen it coming.
THE END (finally)
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