“P-please, honey!
You don’t have to do this!” Bowser said as he was about to have the world’s
deadliest disease given to him by his own ex-wife!
“How else will
we be together then?!”
Wow, what has
this disease done to her mind?! Bowser thought. “I-I promise to visit
you every single day! Just please don’t do this!” Bowser’s life was bad
enough already! He didn’t want a disease to make it even worse.
“B-but how do
I know you aren’t lying to me again?! Huh?! Remember your little lie years
ago?! Hmm?! That lie that got me this virus in the first place?!”
“I-I don’t know
what you are talking about!”
“Oh you very
well do! Why do you sit there are lie to ?!?! WHY?!”
Just then all
8 of Bowser kid’s ran into their dad’s room. “Dad. WHAT is going on in
here?! We heard screaming!” Wendy yelled.
“W-Wendy? Is
that you?” Bowser’s wife asked.
“Yeah… Do I know
you?”
Bowser’s wife
then stopped what she was doing and hugged Wendy very tightly. “I have
missed you, girl,” she whispered.
“Kids! Stay away
from her! She is trouble! Don’t believe a thing she says! She is insane!”
“Who are you?!”
“She is Candy
Kong! Donkey Kong’s girlfriend, remember?” Iggy said.
“Candy Koopa!”
Candy Kong/Koopa corrected.
“Ok... But how
do you know me?”
“I know all of
you very well.”
“Ok, you know
what, lady? You are really freaking me out a LOT, so just say it before
I call the cops!”
“Call the cops
now!” Bowser yelled.
“You don’t want
them to know the truth, do you?” Candy asked.
“What truth?!”
“Kids... I am
your mother!!!” Candy Kong confirmed.
The room then
went silent for a minute. Candy Kong was the last person they all expected
to be their mother.
“Iggy... I thought
you said she was Donkey Kong’s girlfriend?”
“She is! It is
a lie that she is our real mother!”
“Any of you want
to take a DNA test with me? I am your real mother; I have given birth to
all eight of you!”
“So you cheated
on Donkey Kong with our dad?” None of the kids believed Candy Kong was
their real mother.
“Nope. DK and
I never went out. That was just some act for the videogames. If you haven’t
noticed this, me and Donkey Kong share the same last name.. You
didn’t think I would date my own brother, did you?”
“Everyone just thought you two were married... And you are!”
“Well that is
a good theory. But I married your dad, and a little while after you were
all born, things happened between us and I left your dad, and then
some more things happened and I got this lovely disease!”
“You have Pongo
Wrongo?!”
“And what are
these things that happened?”
“YOU’D BETTER
NOT DARE TELL THEM WHAT HAPPENED BETWEEN US. CANDY!!! OR I WILL…!!!”
“Relax! I am
not going to tell them... yet. You were hurt after that and I promise not
to tell them... yet.”
“Am I the only
one that finds it odd that we don’t look like a Kong at all?”
“Ugh, yeah...
I can’t explain that!”
“There you all
go! Proof that this woman is not our mother!”
“I bet Bowser
could explain!” Candy then stared at her husband.
“Nope, nothing
to explain. You kids are right, Candy is not your real mother.” Bowser
grinned.
The kids cheered;
they didn’t want Candy to be their mom.
“Wait a sec!
I am your real mom! Bowser, tell them or else!!!”
“Or else what?”
Bowser said calmly.
Candy then got
out the sample virus.
“Ok ok! Candy
is without a doubt your real mom, kids!!!”
They all looked
at him, confused. “Then how do you explain us not looking like her at all?”
“Remember those
pills I made you kids take when you were younger?”
The kids nodded.
“Those weren’t
pills, those were reptile-growing hormones.”
“Why did you
give us those?”
“Because after
your backstabbing mother left me I didn’t want to see her ever again and
I didn’t want you to have any hints on who she is. I made it so that your
being part monkey would be the farthest thing from your mind.”
“So wait a sec...
We are half Koopa and half Kong?!”
Bowser nodded.
“Aaaaaah! I am
a mutt! How is a reptile mixed with a monkey ever going to become a model?”
A grin spread
on Bowser’s face. “Aren’t you GLAD I never told you all these years?”
“Ugh, Dad! Seriously,
why would you even date this ugly monkey?”
“I am not liking
this reunion!” Candy Kong said. obviously offended.
“Well we don’t
like you!” Wendy said, being very mean.
“Wow, that is
seriously harsh, Wendy...” the kids all said.
Candy Kong then started crying very hard.
“Wow... And I
thought we were the babies!”
“Wendy, stop
it! She is our mom! You could at least try showing some respect!”
“It’s Wendy...”
“... STILL!”
“Oh, and PS,
“Mom”. you have really, really, really awful hair! Oh. and also. MOM. you
are really fat! Lose some weight! And MOM, btw, your legs along with everything
else on your body are UGLY! You don’t deserve to be my mom, so get out
of my life!’
Candy had had
enough of her daughter and she immediately pinned her down to the floor.
“I don’t CARE
if you do not love me, Wendy! We are going to be together anyways! So you’d
better get used to it!”
“How are we going
to be together? Don’t you have to go to your nuthouse hospital room, lady?”
“Oh ,that is it!!
I hate you, Wendy! I don’t care if the virus kills you!”
“What can you
do, lady?”
Candy just stared
at Wendy. “Do you have any idea how contagious Pongo Wrongo is?”
“Yeah, yeah.
It will take 20 minutes for me to get it, but in less then 20 minutes the
doctor will come save me. DOCTOR!!!”
“I’m coming!
I’m coming!”
“Don’t expect
Doctor Cranky Kong to get here any time soon, Wendy!”
“So... what are you going to do? Pin me down here for 20 minutes until we all get the disease?”
“Nope! I’ve got
a much easier way.” Candy Kong then got out a test tube.
“What is that
thing?”
“Wendy! That is a sample of the virus!”
“So?”
“So?! If one drop of that thing falls on you, the disease will be brought on you!”
“Oh.... So I should be freaking out now, should I?”
“Yup.”
“Ok! Aaaaaaah!”
Wendy then kicked Candy Kong in the stomach and ran around the room. Candy
put the test tube back in her pocket and started chasing Wendy around the
room. “Guys! Do something before she kills me!” Wendy yelled while running.
“Well... I sorta think you deserve it...”
“You do know
she is going to give you all the disease after me!”
“Fine. we will
help you!”
Lemmy and Iggy
then tripped their mom.
“Oww! Lemmy!
Iggy! You two were supposed to be good boys! Good boys do not trip their
mother!”
“Yeah, well good
mothers do not try to give their kids deadly diseases!” Lemmy said as he
pinned her feet to the ground.
“Sorry, but good
always pwns evil!” Iggy said as he pinned his mom’s arms to the ground.
“Good?!” Bowser
said, not liking that word..
“Wendy! Go get
her test tube from her pocket!”
“No no! Don’t!”
“So what do we
do with that test tube?” Lemmy asked.
“Well I say we
get ri-” Iggy then looked up at Wendy. She opened the cap of the test tube.
“W-Wendy, what are you doing?”
“Killing our
mom,” Wendy said in a calm way..
“Wendy, don’t!!!”
But it was too
late. Wendy pound the sample of the disease into her mom’s eyes and all
over her body.
“What is going to happen to her now?”
“Well, seeing
how much of the virus Wendy put on her and the fact that she had the disease
to begin with, I would say she will die within one minute...”
“You horrible
kids!!! Your father and I taught you so much better than this!!! We taught
you to love. To care... All of that!!! Not this!!!”
“What are you
talking about?!”
“Bowser... Honey!!!
Amber was NOTHING like this.”
“Amber?” Lemmy said. confused. “Who is Amber?”
“W-what!” Candy
said in shock. “BOWSER!!! You never once told them about Amber? You are
an awful father! You used to be such a wonderful dad, and now look at you!”
“Shut up! Do
not tell the kids!”
“Why?! They have a right to know! That-”
Just then Candy
Kong then dropped dead. It was amazing, considering how young they were
and they had already seen someone die… And it was their own mother...
“We are sooo
not ordering Chinese food ever again!”
Then Cranky came
in. “Ok. I am here! What did ya want. Wendy?”
You can probably
guess what happened from here. Anyways. not long after that all 8 kids
and Bowser had to take shots AGAIN to see if Candy had given them the disease.
“Well, good news,
dudes!” Funky Kong said after the results were confirmed.
“We are going
to live!”
“Duh! Why else would he say ‘good news’, stupid?”
“Why don’t you
just shut up!”
“No, you shut
up!”
“No, you shut
up!”
“No, you shut up!”
Bowser just laughed.
“Aw, the joys of being a parent, huh?”
“I hear ya dude!”
A month later
Bowser and all of his kids went to Candy Kong’s memorial service. “Dad?”
Ludwig asked.
“Yeah, Son?”
“What was our
mom like... BEFORE all that stuff happened to her?”
“Oh, she was wonderful...
She really was a great mom, I will tell ya that... I was in love with her...
I was... I had never felt that way about anyone else.”
“And she just
left you?”
A tear went down
Bowser’s face. “Yeah. I was a criminal in hiding and your mom, being the
wonderful person she was, let me hide in her place. And then I fell in
love with her and she turned me into a different person. Then when she
left me with all of you to raise... I felt betrayed... I felt that all
she taught me was a lie. So I did the exact opposite of how she taught
me and on how she wanted me to raise you.”
It then got silent
for a moment, but then Bowser broke the silence.
“Kids... Forget
everything I taught you. You can choose to follow my or your mom’s path.
Follow any path you want. Pick which side you’re on. I will not force you
at all, I promise. Do what YOU want with your life… not what I want.
Larry then hugged
his dad. “I’m going to be with you!”
Iggy and Lemmy
did the same thing. “We love you, Daddy!” they both said at the same time.
Then Roy came,
then Morton, then Ludwig, and then Bowser Jr. came and they all wanted
to be on their dad’s side and they hugged him. Bowser couldn’t believe
it. After how horribly Bowser had treated his kids, they still wanted to
be loyal to his side. Everyone except Wendy. Bowser looked at his daughter.
“You want to
join us, Wendy?” Bowser asked.
“Do I have to?”
she said stubbornly.
“Nope! Like I
said, it is your very own choice!”
“Well I don’t
care! Because I want to be with you too!” Wendy then jumped on her dad
and started hugging him as well as were the others.
“I have never
said this before, kids, and I probably will never say it again, but...
I LOVE YOU!”
“We love you too,
Dad!” Bowser smiled.
“And I swear
if there is ANYTHING you want to know I will tell ya! No secrets will be
kept between us anymore!”
“Why did Mom
leave you?” Iggy asked.
“Except for that
one! Any others?!”
“Who is Amber?”
“And that one!”
“Maybe if we
order Italian food this time we will figure it out!”
“Nice try. but
we are not ordering foreign foods ever again!”
The kids decided
to give up on finding out why their mom left their Dad or who Amber was
for now. It was a mystery that wouldn’t be solved anytime soon. But the
kids made a promise to themselves that someday they would solve
all the mysteries behind their family tree.
THE END
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