Wario: Before
I start the show off, I just want to answer a question I've received. The
reason I stopped making polls is because I've noticed that a lot of people
went and just looked at the poll instead of focusing on the main attraction,
so I am not making polls anymore. Anyway, last time on Wario's apprentice,
I put seven people up to the test of making a commercial for a karaoke
machine. Their magazine advertisement started off well and finished well,
but with Wart as the commercial's star they lost the challenge. In a tight
private talk it was down to Large Fry and Lakitu, who both did badly in
the challenge. In the end, Large Fry was fired again for getting rid of
Diamond City's best singer, Ashley, over Wart. This week, the competition
is going to get even more intense as we reach toward the final five.
The Apartment,
7:00 AM
Biff Atlas is
in his gym doing pull-ups.
Biff Atlas: HUPP
HUPP!
Biff Atlas does
20 with ease.
The phone rings,
Biff Atlas picks it up.
Biff Atlas: Hello?
Wario: Listen,
this is Wario. I want you to meet me at Diamond City High in two hours.
Biff Atlas: Ok,
sure thing.
Biff Atlas hangs
up
110 minutes later…
Biff Atlas: Time
to go.
Biff Atlas bangs
on a gong, waking everyone up.
Biff Atlas: Let's
get going, everyone! Ten minutes to reach Diamond City High.
The players take
a nice, quick jog to Diamond City High, which is currently empty because
it's summer break.
Wario: You are
at Diamond City High, the school where most of my employees grew up or
are still developing.
Lakitu: ZZZZZZZ.
Lakitu is sleeping,
using Petey's Head for a pillow.
Wario: WAKE UP!
Geno shoots Lakitu
with his finger gun.
Wario: Now pay
attention!
Yoshi: Yoshi
is!
Wario: I wasn't
talking to you!
Biff Atlas: Can
we have the challenge already?
Wario: Yes, you
see, the Olympics are happening soon, and Sega has challenged us to a battle-
Birdo: That was
two years ago!
Bandit: Or this
year, if you count the Winter Olympics.
Birdo: That too!
Wario: Stop being
idiots and let me speak! These are the 2012 Olympics we're talking about!
Everyone: Oh.
Wario: Anyway,
your job is to get athletes.
Everyone groans.
Wario: Come on,
it’s not so bad compared to the other challenges I put you through! Anyway,
Sega has its team together.
Speed: Sonic,
Shadow
Power: Knuckles,
Eggman
Technique: Tails,
Rouge
All Around: Amy,
Blaze
Wario: Other
than that idiot Eggman, that's their best athletes!
Lakitu: Then
get your best athletes
Wario: Mario
is busy making games, Luigi is too busy making a Luigi's Mansion 2, I'm
too busy looking cool, Waluigi's too busy being Unified Tag Team champion,
Peach is too weak, Daisy is too busy being captured by an alien, Yoshi
is on this show, and Bowser isn't King Koopa anymore.
Geno: Then get
the Winter lineup!
Wario: They all
have excuses. Anyway, training is in three hours. Get eight great athletes.
Yoshi: Yoshi
has gold medal in track relays. Can Yoshi be a part of the team?
Wario: No!
Birdo: Why do
you have to be so mean to Yoshi?
Wario: Be quiet
before I fire you both. You go find eight people who can beat Sega at anything!
Bandit: Who’s
the team leader this episode?
Wario: I’m going
with Biff Atlas this time. What's the team name that nobody cares about?
Biff Atlas: Huh?
Lakitu: Petey...
Petey facepalms
Lakitu: Thank
you
Wario: Huh it
is. Now don’t destroy Nintendo’s chances, and get the greatest athletes
you can find!
Biff Atlas: We
have three hours to do this, right?
Wario: No, you
have 2 hours and 50 minutes, NOW GET GOING!
Huh runs out
into Diamond City.
Huh
The team find
2 men at a bus stop.
Geno: I think
we could win this one.
Lakitu: Hey,
any of you good athletes?
Guy: No
Birdo: What about
you?
Other Guy: No.
Birdo: Grrrr.
Lakitu: Is everyone
in Diamond City Lazy and/or rich?
Huh walk around
and find 2 more people, named Snicker (the best pitcher in all of Diamond
City) and Anonymous (that football player in WarioWare Smooth Moves that
had a crush on Mona).
Biff Atlas: You
two want to be in the Olympics?
Anonymous:
I do, but my heart won't let me.
Biff Atlas: Cue
the cliché sad music.
Anonymous: Shut
up!
Anonymous runs
away from Huh
Bandit: Forget
him, how about you, Snicker?
Biff Atlas: Want
to join the Olympics against Sega and finally shut them up?
Snicker: What's
a pitcher going to be able to do in the Olympics?
Geno: Your throwing
abilities is ten times better than Sega's!
Lakitu: We need
people who can win anything against Sega.
Snicker: Sure,
I'm in.
For the rest
of their first hour Huh walk around the business part of Diamond City,
finding only business owners and lawyers.
Geno: Ok, it's
obvious Wario has us hanging around the wrong part of town.
Lakitu: I have
an idea.
Geno: Not now!
How about we go to the beach? There should be good surfers, swimmers, volleyball
players, and body builders.
Lakitu: Fine.
(muttering) And I had a good plan, too.
Huh walk to the
beach. There, they find a muscle-bound Boomerang Bro with an Austrian accent
throwing a boomerang.
Geno: Who are
you?
Boomerang Bro:
I'm Arnold Boomeranger.
Geno: ... Oh
dear DAD.
Arnold: So what
do you puny insects want?
Geno: We're looking
for people to fight against Sega in the 2012 Olympics.
Arnold: Well
you've come to the right place, me and my giant lovely muscles will pulverize
anyone with Sega. I'll do it on one condition though, I want to fight that
fighting freak, Knuckles.
Geno: Deal!
Lakitu: Now can
I make a suggestion?
Bandit: No time!
We're on a roll!
Geno: Bandit!
Shush!
Bandit: Why?
Lakitu: Because
every time someone gets cocky, they end up losing.
Geno: Why are
we talking about people getting eliminated again?
Birdo: So I can
admire Yoshi off camera... which is now on me,
Yoshi: Isn’t
Huh supposed to get athletes?
Geno: Wait! I
have an idea!
Geno turns to
a cameraman.
Cameraman: What?
Geno: I want
you to join the Olympics!
Cameraman: Are
you crazy?
Geno: You're
a Sledge Bro! A massive, powerful, unstoppable machine of pure power! You'd
be perfect for the Olympics!
Cameraman: Uh...
Geno: Haven't
you ever wanted to be acknowledged without having to point a camera at
a mirror just so the world can see what you look like?
Cameraman: …
I'll do it!
Geno: Good.
Arnold: I don't
see why we need him on the team. Me and my deliciously powerful muscles
is all you need.
Biff Atlas: (sarcastically)
Yeah, sure.
Lakitu: Can I
make my suggestion now?
Geno: (ignoring
Lakitu) Let’s go to the capital of Diamond City. I'm sure we can find some
strong bodyguard.
Lakitu has Petey
facepalm for him again, and follows the rest of Huh to the capital. There
they find two bouncers.
Geno: Hey, you
guys ever wanted to crush Sega in the Olympics?
Bouncer 1: Sure!
Geno: This is
easier than beating Sorbetti in Super Mario Galaxy 2!
Bouncer 1: Can
my pal join in as well?
Geno: Your pal?
Bouncer 2: Look,
I'm not going, Larry, Mr. Mayor’s put us in charge of defending this capital
for a reason, and it’s not for a chance. It's to defend this great city
from turning into an economic wasteland like Desert Land and Grass Land.
Curse this economy.
Yoshi: Team doing
this to defeat the company that rivals us. If team defeat them then team
is free to control videogame world and economy
Birdo:
Plus the Olympics won' t happen for another two years. You just have to
show up for one practice and beat a Sega character.
Yoshi: You want
Nintendo to lose money to blue hedgehog?
Bouncer 2: …
*sigh* … Fine.
Lakitu: Hooray!
Geno: Okay, we
got Snicker, Arnold Boomeranger, a cameraman, and two bouncers. We need
three more.
Lakitu: If I
could make a suggestion…
Geno: NO!
Lakitu: All right,
all right, I'll shut up.
Geno: Now where
do I find three good athletes?
Lakitu: Where
do WE find three good athletes?
Geno: That's
what I said.
Lakitu: No you
didn't. You've been focusing only on yourself for quite some time now.
Geno: What? Just
because Biff Atlas over here is being quiet and I'm being resourceful makes
me focus this all around myself?
Lakitu: Dude,
since episode one you've been barely working with an actual group. You’re
always by yourself or with just one other person. And when you do work
with a group, it ends up losing.
Geno: It's true
that I have been working in a more isolated area than anyone else, but
the people I work with are the good ones. When I worked with Birdo, we
won; when I worked with Bandit, we won; when I worked with Lemmy, we lost.
Lakitu: Don't
I recall you making a doll based off YOURSELF in the toy-making episode?
Geno: Don't I
recall my team WINNING because of that idea?
Lakitu: Stop
being a dictator and let Biff Atlas lead.
Geno: He can
lead when he feels like it.
Lakitu: He's
barely getting a chance to speak! In fact, I'm starting to forget who the
team leader is!
While Lakitu
and Geno argue for a long 30 minutes, the rest of Huh are watching with
very curious eyes, wondering who'll win it. Until Birdo gets bored. Splat!
Geno: OW!
Lakitu: You deserved
that.
Birdo: Shut up!
We spent a half hour listening to you two argue, we're due at the training
stadium in an hour!
Lakitu: Fine,
let's go find athletes.
Biff Atlas: And
I know just where to start.
Geno: Where?
Biff Atlas: Follow
me!
Biff Atlas leads
Huh to an alley. Biff Atlas picks up a box for no real reason. He then
shakes it up. Shy Guy (from this show) falls out.
Shy Guy: What
the %$*()$# do you idiots want?
Geno: We want
you to join us in the 2012 Olympics.
Yoshi: It's to
defeat Sega once and for all.
Shy Guy: ...
Hmm... Fine.
Geno: All right,
and we need two people.
Bandit: We may
actually win a challenge!
Biff Atlas: And
I know where to go next!
Biff Atlas warps
Huh to Luigi's Mansion; they enter.
Biff Atlas: I
think it's time my nephew played his first game.
Biff Atlas and
Huh walk through a hallway to Chauncey's Room, then open the door.
Chauncey: WAAAAAAAH!
Biff Atlas puts
a pacifier in Chauncey's mouth and puts him in a stroller, and they warp
back to Diamond City.
Biff Atlas: See,
easy as pie.
For the next
thirty minutes, Huh cannot find another athlete to fight Sega.
Geno: Where is
everyone?
Lakitu: Can I
make a suggestion?!
Geno: Shut up!
And actually help!
Lakitu: ... *sigh*
Fine.
Huh start running
around for that last player. They forgot that it is Sunday afternoon and
everyone is praying
to DAD for success in business. At one point, they run past Mona Pizza,
and the cameraman spots Wario and Mona inside. He decides to take a peek
inside. (with a camera, of course).
Wario: All right,
listen. Through some... technical terms. I want you to rejoin WarioWare.
Mona: Listen,
Wario, and I'm not an idiot.
Wario: Of course
you aren't, all I'm saying is-
Mona: I saw last
episode...
Wario: Oh...
that...
Wario tries to
look cool and care nothing about it, but if you look into his beady little
eyes, you'd see a man just ready to burst into tears. Mona, of course,
does.
Mona: Listen...
Wario, it's okay.
Wario: I still
can't believe she would do that to me.
Mona: Everyone
does that to someone at some point. I mean, look at Mario and Captain Syrup.
Just the mere
mention of Wario's archrivals makes him so angry, he prepares another earthquake
punch. But Mona stops him just in time.
Mona: Listen,
shhh shhh, it's okay. You don't have to care about them ever again... Here,
let me a buy you a Mona Special.
Wario: Okay...
It better be Meat Lovers with Garlic.
Mona: It always
is.
A few minutes
later Mona comes back with a pizza; Wario almost immediately starts gobbling
it down.
Wario: You see
*burp*, this is why I like you so much. You're a good cook.
Mona: (Wario
likes me! *girly squeal* I guess the way to a man's heart really is through
his stomach.)
Wario farts.
Mona: ... By
the way... on your way back to the office, want to rob a bank of two?
Wario: Mona,
you read me like a book.
Both get out
of their chairs, go into the bathrooms, and transform into Wario-man and
Mona-man... woman... whatever. (I don't know, it's just Mona in a Wario-man
suit.)
Bandit: Yo, camera
guy! Where are you?!
Cameraman: Right
over here, Yoshi.
Birdo: We've
been looking everywhere for you. We have ten minutes left, and we still
can't find somebody!
Bandit: This
is hopeless. We almost had this challenge in the bag.
Lakitu: Can-
Birdo: Lakitu,
shut up!
Yoshi: Wait!
Yoshi want to hear idea.
Lakitu: Make
Petey one of the athletes.
Petey: Hi.
Bandit: He can't
play!
Lakitu: Actually,
he can. He's not planning to be Wario's apprentice. He's not a contestant,
I say he should play.
Geno: Well, since
we can't find anyone else, we might as well let Petey join.
Lakitu: Yes!
Biff Atlas: To
the stadium!
Diamond City All Around Gym.
Huh get into the
DCAAG seeing Team Sega and Wario with Mona.
Wario: Hmmm,
you're five minutes early. Well, I was going to give you 30 minutes, but
thanks to this, you can train them for 35 minutes. Everyone is going to
go one on one with a member of Team Sega. The winner of events will get
a bronze star. I want you guys to make Sega feel miserable, so get me five
bronze stars if Biff Atlas wants any hope of getting immunity next episode.
Biff Atlas: Okay,
looks like we need to start training!
Biff Atlas blows
a whistle.
Biff Atlas: YOU
EIGHT! TO THE TRACK! Now cue the music!
The Rocky theme
plays. All eight of the athletes start running around the track in slow
motion (thank you, video editing). Arnold, of course, is doing better than
anyone else, The cameraman is trying to run and hold the camera at the
same time, Chauncey is doing surprisingly well for a ghost baby, the bouncers
are fast, Snicker is surprisingly slower than some, Petey is by far the
slowest, and Shy Guy is in the middle.
Biff Atlas (slow
motion): Drop and give me twenty!
The athletes
do twenty push ups at the same time and speed, except for Arnold, who finishes
all twenty in ten seconds, and Petey, who can't do one.
Biff Atlas (slow
motion): Jump on that trampoline!
The athletes jump;
this is the only event Arnold is bad at, while Snicker is very good at
it. The cameraman gets motion sickness and gives up early (sooner than
Arnold, who justs flopps around before giving up). Petey is also doing
well getting a lot of good air time, while the bouncers are simply jumping
and flipping. Chauncey also gets good air time; in fact, he never comes
down. Shy Guy is once again in the middle of the performances.
Time’s up, and
Biff Atlas looks at a list.
Biff Atlas: Okay,
here's our competitors.
Biff Atlas hands
the list of players over to Wario.
Chauncey vs. Sonic
in a 100 meter race
Bouncer 1 vs.
Shadow in a 100 meter race
Arnold Boomeranger
vs. Knuckles in a Thwomp Lifting Contest
Cameraman vs.
Eggman in a Hammer Toss Contest.
Snicker vs. Rouge
in a Trampoline Gymnastics Contest
Petey Piranha
vs. Tails in a Long Jump Contest
Bouncer 2 vs.
Amy in a 100 Meter Swimming Contest
Shy Guy vs. Blaze
in a Fencing Contest
Wario: All right,
LET THE GAMES BEGIN!
Kamek pops out
of nowhere behind an announcers table.
Kamek: Hello,
and welcome, everyone, to the training of the 2012 Olympics! Nintendo vs.
Sega once again, ladies and gentlemen! Sega has barely made any changes
to this year's bracket, however Nintendo has an entire new array of athletes
to take on Sega! Now let's on to the first event! Sonic the Hedgehog vs.
Chauncey the ghost.
While Sonic is
preparing, Bandit is "cleaning" Sonic's shoes. When the event is about
to begin, Chauncey and Sonic both go to the starting line. Bandit gives
Sonic his "shoes".
Toad: On your
mark! Get set! GO!
Kamek: Sonic
trips and lands on his face as Chauncey sprints off!
Sonic: What the?
Sonic sees that
Bandit has switched his speed shoes with his slow down shoes from a terrible
Sonic game that will not be mentioned. Chauncey is already close to the
finish line.
Sonic: All right
then.
Sonic spin dashes,
and is now moving much quicker than Chauncey. They pass the finish line
at the same time.
Kamek: It's a
photo finish! Soon we will see a slow motion replay.
A frame by frame
replay of the very end of the race shows that Chauncey's pacifier crossed
the finish line before Sonic did.
Kamek: Nintendo
gets a bronze star!
Biff Atlas: Way
to go, my nephew!
Chauncey: Goo!
Kamek: Time for
the second event, even though it's the exact same thing as the first. Shadow
the Hedgehog vs. Larry the Bouncer.
Shadow: Hmmph.
Bouncer 1: This
will be a piece of cake.
Shadow and Bouncer
1 get into position.
Toad: On your
mark! Get set! GO!
Unlike Sonic,
Shadow gets a good start, as does Bouncer 1. They both move at a quick
pace, but Bouncer 1 begins to tire, and Shadow crosses the finish line
first.
Kamek: Sega gets
a bronze star.
Shadow: Hmmph
Perfect.
Sonic: Woo! Highfive!
Shadow just stares
at Sonic.
Meanwhile with
Arnold and Knuckles…
Arnold: Me and
my glorious muscles are going to teach three lessons. Lesson one: biceps;
lesson two: triceps; and lesson three: quadriceps.
Knuckles: Heh,
fists always do the talking here, bub!
Arnold: We will
see, puny gerbil.
Kamek: And the
third event is underway! Knuckles vs. Arnold Boomeranger!
Arnold and Knuckles
pick up 20 Thwomps.
Kamek: Twenty!
That's a new record, beating the old record of 15!
After an hour,
both are still hanging in.
Kamek: And the
imaginary crowd goes wild...
Kamek falls asleep
on the announcers table as do Huh and the other competitors other than
Biff Atlas, Arnold, and Knuckles. While no one is looking, Biff Atlas floats
into the ground, comes up behind Knuckles, and pulls his tail.
Knuckles: YOWCH!
Knuckles falls
on his butt, and all twenty Thwomps fall on him, waking everyone up. Biff
Atlas then teleports to his team before anyone notices him.
Kamek: Knuckles
has dropped the Thwomps! Nintendo gets a bronze star!
Arnold: I predicted
it would be a shorter win, but my muscles do it again.
Kamek: The fourth
event is coming up! Dr. Ivo Eggman Robotnik vs... a cameraman.
Wario goes to
the cameraman.
Wario: Listen,
I want you to win this. I absolutely hate Eggman, and if he wins, I'll
never hear the end of it.
Cameraman: I
don't know what I can do, you paid to tape this show.
Wario snatches
the camera.
Wario: There!
Now you can use both hands!
Cameraman: Okay,
Wario, I will not fail you.
Kamek: Eggman
is beginning to spin around with that hammer. He lets go and it lands a
measly 56 feet away from the starting place! Let's see what the cameraman
can do to that.
The cameraman
picks up the hammer, starts spinning around, and lets go.
Kamek: It's going!
It's going! ... It lands 654 feet from the starting place! Nintendo gets
a third bronze star!
Eggman: What?!
Wario: WAHAHA!
Cameraman: Can
I have my camera back now?
Wario: What?
Oh yeah, sure.
Wario gives the
camera back to the cameraman and continues to laugh at Eggman.
Kamek: Oh, how
I love personal rivalries with Sega. Like how I hate that stupid Omachao!
But now we have Rouge the Bat vs. Snicker the Baseball Pitcher in a trampoline
contest! Rouge, you go first! I'll be your judge!
Rouge stays up
in the air thanks to her wings and does a bunch of cute poses to amuse
the judge. She ends it by putting her leg behind her head and bouncing
on one leg.
Kamek: Hmmmm,
I would give that an 8.9 out of ten, since you barely used the trampoline.
But it was very impressive! It is now Snicker's turn.
Snicker begins
jumping easily, doing simple flips to get a lot of air. He then pulls out
some baseballs and starts throwing them at the trampoline, they bounce
in a simultaneous order. Snicker then walks/hops on the bouncing baseballs,
then he makes a pile of four balls and starts balancing on them. He then
shifts his weight to make the baseball at the bottom bounce to the top.
He does this again and starts juggling the balls until he is balancing
on one ball and juggling three. He ends his act by throwing the baseballs
down, doing a double flip and catching all of them. Kamek is in awe.
Kamek: Ten out
of ten! Ten out of ten! This is the best act I've ever seen! Nintendo gets
their fourth bronze star!
Biff Atlas: Yes!
One more and we win the challenge! You’d better hope Petey wins the challenge.
Lakitu: Oh, he
will, Biff Atlas. He will.
Kamek: And now
it is time for the sixth event! Tails Miles Prower vs. Petey Pirahna in
a long jump contest!
Petey: I will
not fail you, Master!
Kamek: Petey
makes the jump and starts fluttering with his leafs. Those leaves seem
to be extremely strong, because Petey is breaking world records!
Petey: Ha ha!
...*pant, pant*
Kamek: Petey
seems to be weakening... yes, he's stopped around the 100 yard marker!
Try to beat that, Humans! Tails is making his way.
Tails: Let's
see how I should do this.
Kamek: Tails
jumps and flies off into the air! I must say that is the highest jump I've
ever seen... wait! He's coming down! ... Like a comet!
BOOM!
Kamek: *cough,
cough* The smoke seems to be clearing... *cough* ... It seems that Tails
has... no way! Tails has just completed a 274-yard jump! Sega wins a bronze
star!
Petey walks to
Lakitu in shame.
Petey: I'm sorry,
Master.
Lakitu: It's
okay, Petey. Besides, we have four bronze stars, we should be safe.
Biff Atlas: Ten
of my pearls, you just jinxed us!
Kamek: Gambling
is always a fun way to raise the stakes! But here is the next! Amy Rose
vs. Bob The Bouncer in swimming.
Amy and Bouncer
2 get into position.
Toad: On your
mark! Get set! Go!
Kamek: Amy and
Bob jump down into the water, but it's all Amy! Bob's bouncer outfit is
holding him back; by the time Amy is done, Bob is only halfway! Sega gets
its fourth bronze star!
Amy gets out
of the water and Sonic hugs her. Bouncer 2 gets out and heads toward an
annoyed Huh.
Biff Atlas: Well,
Shy Guy, you have to beat Blaze at fencing if you want Huh to win.
Shy Guy: I will
make sure she doesn't strike me once.
Kamek: And it's
time for the final training event for today! Blaze the Cat vs. Shy Guy
in a fencing contest!
Shy Guy and Blaze
enter the arena, bow, and begin to joust.
Kamek: It's 15
jabs to the winner and that last bronze star, folks! What will happen?
Blaze: Wooyah!
Shy Guy: Yikes!
Blaze trips up
Shy Guy and jabs him 15 times.
Kamek: Wow, that
was quick. Sega gets their fifth bronze star.
Huh are disappointed
in themselves. Biff Atlas is punching the floor at how close he was like
the last time he was team leader. He knows he's going have to face the
wrath of his maybe future boss.
Wario: You guys
lost AGAIN! *sigh* Just get in the warp pipe out here.
The warp pipe
appears, Wario, Mona, and Huh get in it.
Wario's Office
Wario is in awesome
seat, glaring at the people who have a 1 in 6 chance of getting fired.
Mona sits down next to him, carrying large sacks of coins that they stole
from a bank. Huh sit in their seats with their heads down.
Wario: Well,
let's get to the chase. You guys lost, the window of opportunity is near
nothing for you guys. You must REALLY impress me in these next few episodes,
or else it will end it terror for five of you. Biff Atlas, where did you
guys go wrong?
Biff Atlas: ...
I'm not really sure.
Wario: Let me
tell you what I think went wrong. Ahem, you were on the sidelines too much,
Birdo kept agreeing with Yoshi, Yoshi was the only one who did slightly
well recruiting BAD athletes, Bandit was on the sidelines as well but as
least did impressive things, Geno argued with Lakitu and wasted valuable
time, and Lakitu choose Petey as an athlete.
Biff Atlas: I
must admit that I was on the sidelines for a good chunk of this mission.
Wario: Honesty
is good karma, and a pathway to bad results, Biff Atlas. Birdo, other than
usually take Yoshi's side, what did you do?
Birdo: I broke
up the fight between Lakitu and Geno.
Wario: True.
Speaking of Geno, why did you have that fight with Lakitu?
Geno: He didn't
admire my awesomeness.
Wario: Geno,
let me tell you something... you're not awesome. No one on this show is
awesome until proven. You, my maybe future apprentice, have yet to prove
it, and the only reason you're still on this show is that you haven't been
sent up for a private talk for quite some time. I'd watch your mouth.
Geno: Yes, Wario.
Wario: Lakitu!
Why did you suggest Petey to be an athlete?!
Lakitu: Well,
we were almost out of time and would've automatically forfeited if we showed
with seven athletes, plus in most sports games Petey's proven to be a great
athlete. In fact, he once was on your baseball team.
Wario: True,
but you would've had more time if you hadn't had that argument with Geno.
Lakitu: I agree
with that.
Wario: Then you
shouldn't have done it! Dear DAD you're an idiot! Yoshi, why did you try
to get bouncers?
Yoshi: Bouncers
are tough guys, team needed tough guys!
Wario: You already
had a cameraman and Arnold Boomeranger, why would you want another tough
person?
Yoshi: Oh...
Yoshi didn't think of that.
Wario: Obviously.
Bandit, until the end you did little to nothing. So I'm just going to ask
who you would fire.
Bandit: Yoshi,
as he contributed almost nothing to the team.
Wario: Yoshi?
Yoshi: Yoshi
would fire Biff Atlas
Wario: Birdo?
Birdo: Hmmmm,
I would probably fire Lakitu. It's a tie with Biff Atlas, but at least
Biff Atlas gave us Chauncey.
Wario: Lakitu?
Lakitu: Well,
probably Biff Atlas, I mean he's the one who made the list for the athletes
to fight. I personally would've chosen Chauncey at fencing so he wouldn't
get hit, have Bouncer 2 race and that would've been a loss, and I would
have Petey swim since that's his specialty. With our two power wins, one
trampoline win, and the two changed wins, he could've won five stars.
Wario: Geno?
Geno: I would
fire Lakitu, because he made a problem massive when he kept it until the
end. Also if he didn't argue with me, we could've found someone better
than Petey, like a Paratroopa or another Lakitu, since they fly all the
time.
Wario: All right,
Biff Atlas, which two players are you going to take to have a private talk
with me?
Biff Atlas: Yoshi
and Lakitu.
Wario: All right.
Petey, go back to the apartment, I'll send you an Email if Lakitu is fired.
The rest of you have secured a place in the final five.
Bandit, Birdo,
and Geno hop into a warp pipe.
Wario: I want
to have a little talk with you three.
Wario leads the
3 couch potatoes to the top floor, where one of them will be for the last
time.
Wario: Now that
we're alone, Biff Atlas, why shouldn't I fire you?
Biff Atlas: If
I wasn't team leader then we might not have even gotten those three others,
and while Geno got a lot of good players, I also got Chauncey on the team.
Wario: Yes, but
you also got Shy Guy.
Biff Atlas: I
thought being a gang leader around the world would help us win.
Wario: But why
did you place him in fencing? Or anywhere?
Biff Atlas: Well,
did you want the episode to end in a forfeit?
Wario: No, however
you caused major problems with that list, and training the athletes too
much.
Biff Atlas: Yes,
but I wanted to make sure I was right on the assignments.
Wario: Then you're
just saying you're a giant idiot! DAD!
Biff Atlas: Hey!
In the very beginning you said you wanted someone who can take out thugs
and the kind of guy for you-
Wario: I also
said I wanted someone who can figure out what stocks are worth these days;
you probably don’t understand the difference between a stock and a bond.
Now be quiet! Lakitu, why shouldn’t I fire you?
Lakitu: Because
we wouldn’t have been able to use Petey and therefore would have had to
forfeit.
Wario: Yes, but
you also had an entirely pointless fight with Geno. You might've had time.
Lakitu: Yes,
but I think that motivated Biff Atlas to be a leader. He was on the sidelines
a lot of the challenge.
Wario: Answer
me this. You kept wanting Petey to be an athlete for the entire challenge,
why didn't you give up?
Lakitu: Because
Petey was jumping against a two-tailed fox that can fly higher than anyone
else. He has weaknesses, but if you put him in water, like a pool, then
he can absolutely dominate. Besides, he was always there when you needed
him in Mario Baseball.
Wario: True.
Yoshi, why shouldn't I fire you?
Yoshi: Yoshi
actually got people to join!
Wario: Yes, but
they ended up just blatantly being stupid, and costing you, when you could've
got someone better.
Yoshi: Plan wasn't
Yoshi's idea, plan to go to capital was Geno's.
Wario: True...
Hmm... I think I've come to a decision
Wario examines
all three.
Wario: Biff Atlas,
you are a bad team leader. You had few ideas this round, and at one point
I said you probably won't win the game.
Biff Atlas: But
if you look at my ideas, I came up with great ways. I always was a great
supporter, I just had a bad day.
Wario: Shut up!
Lakitu, you caused a fight that cost your team valuable time. You've been
slipping in your challenge roles, but you are a talker, and you could've
had a point in the challenge, where you were great.
Wario turns to
Yoshi.
Wario: Yoshi,
you convinced the wrong crowd to join you. That REALLY cost your team,
and that is why you're-
Yoshi: Fired?
Wario: Yep. Biff
Atlas, Lakitu, you're dismissed.
Biff Atlas and
Lakitu leave.
Wario: Yoshi,
even if the plan wasn't your fault, you still went along with it. A wise
old man once said, "Who's more foolish? The fool? Or the fool that follows
him?" My answer to that is "the fool that follows him". You, Yoshi, fell
into that role, and cost yourself a job with me. So... OUT OF MY BUILDING!
Yoshi walks up
the stairs into the Cheep Cheep blimp.
Yoshi: Guess
Yoshi has to learn to be a follower more than a leader. Yoshi hopes to
join Wario some other day, but now, Yoshi wishes hugs and kisses to Birdo.
And Yoshi wishes her luck.
Wario makes sure
the camera isn't looking, and takes out the famous yellow and red book.
The camera is, of course, looking from right behind Wario, and finally
sees that it is a scrapbook of Wario and Mona's "happy moments".
Wario: *sigh*
For once, I have to thank you, Biff Atlas.
Wario knows the
camera has been behind him the whole time. He then gives the cameraman
a nice, good kick to the shin. The cameraman falls down. Wario picks up
the camera and starts to film on his own
Wario: For once,
I'm going to do the narrator's job... Ahem, one job, now five people working
for it, my search for an apprentice... continues... See? Now that's the
way to film the ending line... What do you mean the camera's still on?
... Oh, what button do I press again? ... Oh this one-
The screen turns
dark.
To Be Continued...
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