Survivor 2: The REAL Deal

By Badyoyo and Birby6

N. Gin is seen giggling

Ludwig: What's so funny?

N. Gin: Nothing, I just find it funny that you're the fifth person voted out in both Survivor 2: The REAL Deal andin Survivor Delfino Isle.

Ludwig: Well, I feel for that version of me.

Roy Koopa: Couldn't we also technically say Goomba was also the fourth person voted out in both of the Fun Fictions?

N. Gin: Eh, Goomba just sacrificed himself instead of getting voted out.

Ludwig: Just cut to the camps.

N. Gin:... Uh oh.

N. Gin pulls out a cellphone and begins calling Badyoyo

N. Gin: Can you send me a new plot device? Someone seems to have stolen mine.

Badyoyo (over phone): Sorry, we're out of stock. Besides, Iím busy with my own problems!

He is seen with his remaining Plitís Next Top Model contestants, which are Rosalina, Wendy, Penny, Jolene, and Koopie Koo. They're performing the music video "Winter Wonderland".

Wendy: In the meadow we can build a snowman! We can make him look like Charlie Brown!

Badyoyo: CUT!

N. Gin: You're just hosting Plit's Next Top Model, aren't you?

Badyoyo: Uh... No I'm not.

N. Gin: I can hear the Winter Wonderland music over the phone.

Badyoyo: Uh... Find a plot device yourself! See ya!

He hangs up

N. Gin: Great. NOW where will I find it?

?: Let me host, duh!

N. Gin turns around to see a pink baby Yoshi and a blue-shelled Paratroopa standing there. The baby Yoshi is holding the Plot Device

Baby Yoshi: Iím Ella, and the Paratroopa here is Blueytroopa. Sheís my so-called babysitter.

N. Gin: Wait, you work for birby6! Why are you two here?

Blueytroopa: Heís busy at the moment.

Cut to the Plitís Model Studio, where birby6 the Goomba is chatting with Badyoyo

Badyoyo: So youíre here to host with me, and your partners are hosting with N. Gin?

Birby6: You bet. By the way, I shouldíve warned N. Gin of Ellaís vicious behavior.

Badyoyo: Oh well, heíll find out.

Back to N. Gin...

N. Gin: Who cares about birby6? Now, I need that remote!

Ella: Let us host with you, and weíll give it to you.

N. Gin curses under his breath.

N. Gin: Fine, but youíd better not mess up the game!

Blueytroopa: Fine with us.

Ella proceeds to give N. Gin the device, but she trips on it, which accidentally presses one of the buttons, causing it to snow in Forever Forest

N. Gin: Snow?

Ella: Well it is near Christmas, so it seems appropriate for it to snow.

Blueytroopa: Plus, now itís going to last the entire episode.

N. Gin slaps his forehead, remembering he did the exact same thing in Episode 2, only with rain.

N. Gin: Weíd better get coats now...

They proceed to look around aimlessly for coats

Paper Powers
Day 11

N. Gin: You screwed it up already! It's Day 16!

Bluey: Sorry.

Paper Powers
Day 16

Koops walks out of the shelter., sniffling. First he's surprised by the odd weather. But then he is sad. He's homesick. He misses Koopie Koo, and he's at the point where he could snap again. He walks off to keep himself from hurting his tribe.

Everyone else starts waking up, and notices the odd weather

Bow: What the?

Bombette: I didnít even know it snowed here.

Parakarry: My wings are freezing up!

He proceeds to show the tribe his frozen wings

Parakarry, Mailman: Having wings is so much easier than walking for me, but in weather like this, my wings die down. Looks like Iíll be walking now...

Rawk Hawk: It must be really cold if it RAWKED your wings.

Bow: By the way, where's the anti-social weirdo?

Everyone looks around for Koops. Bow soon finds him near a frozen river packing snow and ice together.

Bow: Koops, everyone is looking for you!

Koops looks at Bow; there's something new in his eyes.

Koops: Go away.

Bow: Now what's wrong with you? You know you've always been the most annoying of the group. I don't even know why you're still on this tribe, nobody loves you anywa-


Koops hits Bow with a slushball. (Insert Bill Cosby's definition of what it's like getting hit with a slushball here.) Bow goes back to camp.

Bow, Boo Princess: I was trying to comfort him, and what do I get? I get hit with a slushball! I swear, this team is bonkers.

Terrible Tribe
Day 16

Like Paper Powers, everyone wakes up and notices the weather. Unlike Paper Powers though, something else has happened...

Cheep Cheep: Okay, two things. One, itís snowing, and two, WHAT HAPPENED TO OUR SHELTER?!

Their shelter is completely covered in mud and snow. So is the food, and so is most of Terrible Tribe. Petey then comes in as everyone looks at him angrily

Petey: Hi everyone!

Birdo pulls herself from the heap of mud and snow that is their shelter.

Birdo: Did you do this?

Petey: Do what?

Petey looks at the "shelter".

Bandit: It totally was him! I know it through my bloodshot eyes!

Petey is speechless, half because he canít believe the tribe would think that he would do this, the other half because he canít remember Bandit having bloodshot eyes.

Lakitu: I canít believe youíd actually go around and spit mud on our shelter!

Petey: But... but... but...

Lakitu: Thatís it, itís over. Petey. We're through!

Lakitu storms off, and the others walk away, leaving Petey behind.

Petey, Funeral Director: I... *sigh* What did I do wrong? I just went so see how nice the Forest looked in snow. The second I get back, poof, our shelter's gone.

Meanwhile, the others join the Five Guys to have shelter.

Paper Powers
Day 16

Everyone is at camp, excluding Rawk Hawk and Koops, and are eating and talking in the kitchen. Bow is talking about Koopsís strange behavior to the others in the bedroom.

Bombette: He was crying his heart out?

Bow: Yup, every last inch. I donít see what his problem is, but heís just boarding the crazy train once more.

Parakarry: I don't know, maybe he's-

The Air Mail lands next to Rawk Hawk

Rawk Hawk: We got RAWWWWWKING mail.

He reads it to everyone

Rawk Hawk: Money makes the world go round. Be prepared for this.

Bow: Why does this one not rhyme?

Parakarry: Maybe it has something to do with money?

Bow: This whole Survivor thing IS about money!

Bombette just acts amazed, but she is hiding somethingÖ

Bombette, Demolitions Expert: This clue might have stumped everyone else, but not me. Itís obviously the Survivor auction, and I guess itís our reward challenge!

Reward Challenge

The tribes come in, including Petey, Lakitu, and Koops. Koops and Petey are shedding tears while Lakitu is fuming at Petey. N. Gin, Ella, and Blueytroopa all have coats on. The others notice Ella and Blueytroopa.

Bandit: Whatís with the baby Yoshi and Paratroopa?

N. Gin: Theyíll be hosting with me, courtesy of birby6. Plus, it was them that caused it to snow, not me.

Michael Tarver: No wonder itís snowing!

N. Gin: I know itís early, but Ella and Blueytroopa thought it would be a good idea. Welcome to the Survivor Auction!

He hands everyone 500 coins.

Bandit: Woohoo, free money!

Blueytroopa: Sorry, you can only use the money in this auction.

Bandit: Dang it!

N. Gin: We will be hosting five items, and you can bid as long as you have enough coins. However, there is a twist. Two of the hidden items are bad, so youíd better bid on ones that you think are good. Are we clear?

The survivors nod

N. Gin: Okay then, first item! Weíll start at 50!

Bombette: 100!

Bow: 200!

Rawk Hawk: 221!

N. Gin: Going once... twice... sold to Rawk Hawk!

Rawk Hawk feels glad, and goes to get his item. He opens the box, only for the box to explode in his face

Rawk Hawk: What was that?!

Ella: You won a Bomb-in-the-box, courtesy of me of course!

She rolls on the ground laughing. Rawk Hawk wants to beat her up, but remembers sheís a host

N. Gin: Item no. 2 is up now! Letís start at 150!

Parakarry: 164!

Bow: 178!

Bandit: OVER-

N. Gin: I swear, if you use that meme I will kick you out of this game and launch you into a prison for stupid people.

Bandit: I'll shut up now.

Petey: *sniff...* 200.

N. Gin: Going once... twice... sold!

Petey: Well that's useless! We already have a Five Guys!

N. Gin: Take it anyway!

Petey goes up to get his item, and the inside is filled with a dozen cheeseburgers. This cheers him up a little, but not fully. He eats one before going back to his spot

N. Gin: Time for item no. 3! Starting at 125!

Bow: 164!

Michael Tarver: 199!

Bombette: 255!

Bandit: 301!

Lakitu: 302!

N. Gin: Going once... twice... sold!

Really hoping this isnít a bad item, Lakitu goes up and opens the box. It contains a card with a picture of Gloomtail on it

Lakitu: What is this?

Blueytroopa: Itís a card for Gloomtail Insurance! Every time you get beat up from now on, Gloomtail will come and beat them up!

Lakitu smiles, knowing this might end all the beatings. He goes back to his spot

N. Gin: No. 4 here! Starting at 200!

Birdo: 222!

Michael Tarver: 230!

Bandit: 27-

Michael Tarver: TARVER TUCK!

Michael Tarver bodyslams Bandit.

Michael Tarver: He didnít say anything.

N. Gin: *sigh* Going once... twice... sold.

Michael Tarver goes up and opens the box. Inside is a note that says ďYou just been Rick Rolled sucker!Ē

N. Gin: Yup, that was the other bad item.

Michael Tarver: Seriously? Weíve dropped down to this meme?

N. Gin: Sadly, yes.

Bow: At least we know the last present isnít bad, and it's mine!

N. Gin: Time for the final item. Starting at 300!

Bow: 443!

Bandit: 470!

Cheep Cheep: 500!

N. Gin: Going once... twice... sold!

Cheep Cheep goes up to the box, and inside is a Golden Lumaris Miniature.

Paper Powers: What's that?

Blueytroopa: You'll find out soon.

N. Gin: Time for all of you to head back to camp.

They do so.

Terrible Tribe
Day 17

Bandit, Hotel Owner: Stupid Cheep Cheep. She's got immunity.

Cheep Cheep: We still need to rebuild our shelter due to what happened.

Bandit: Well, at least we still have the Five Guys. That overgrown plant doesnít deserve to win this.

Cheep Cheep: You know, Bandit, somehow I feel that Petey isn't responsible.

Bandit: He totally is responsible! Who else couldíve done it?

Cheep Cheep, Athletic Swimmer: There just isn't enough evidence on the table. So there's mud on the shelter. So what? That could easily just be the snow.

The two continue to chat, while Lakitu and Petey are talking.

Lakitu: Give me one of your cheeseburgers!

Petey: ... Ok Mas-

Lakitu: And don't call me master! We're through! Remember?!

Petey: But... Lakitu, what about the seed?

Lakitu: Seed? What seed?

Lakitu pulls out the life seed.

Lakitu: This?

Petey: The gift of my affection toward you, showing I'll do anything for you.

Lakitu: Well here's what I say to that.

Lakitu pops the seed in his mouth, then spits it into the remains of their old shelter. Petey begins to cry. Lakitu leaves and Michael Tarver enters.

Michael Tarver: The ocean is frozen solid, and I can see my own breath. I hate snow!

He ties his signature bandana to his mouth. He then notices Petey crying.

Michael: Hey, what's wrong?

Petey begins to speak, butÖ

Michael: I'll tell you what's wrong. My last name isn't showing!

Ella: Sorry.

Michael Tarver: Much better.

Petey: Well, Lakitu doesn't care for me anymore.

Michael Tarver: I don't blame him.

Petey: Why?

Michael Tarver: Look at what you did to the shelter.

Petey: Michael Tarver, I assure you. I didn't do anything to the shelter.

Michael Tarver: Yeah right.

Petey: If I had eyes, I would tell you to look into them.

Michael Tarver: Huh?

Petey: Read my lips. I didn't do anything to the shelter.

Michael Tarver: Ok, maybe you didn't, but-

Petey: I swear I went into the forest to see what the snow looked like there. LOOK! My footprints are still there.

Michael Tarver sees footprints that aren't anywhere near close to the shelter and are leading into Forever Forest.

Michael Tarver: ... Fine, I believe you.

Petey: And Lakitu just destroyed my only gift to him

Petey picks up the life seed and gives it to Michael Tarver.

Petey: I used to care so much about that man. He's my life... *sniff*

Petey begins to cry. Michael Tarver doesn't really care. He instead takes the seed and eats it.

Michael Tarver, Professional Wrestler: You know, these seeds aren't too bad.

Paper Powers
Day 18

Bow is currently having a meeting with Rawk Hawk and Bombette in the kitchen.

Bombette: What do you suppose we do about Koops?

Bow: I think we should vote him off, for the better good. Whatever is going on, it must stop.

Bow, Boo Princess: Koops is breaking down. Itís now a good chance to vote him off, since heís in a weakened state.

Bombette, Demolitions Expert: Sadly, I agree with Bow. Heís on to something, and you never know what could happen.

Rawk Hawk, Professional Wrestler: Good idea with Koops, Bow. Attacking him in a weakened state will RAWWWWWK him.

Meanwhile upstairs, Koops and Parakarry are talking.

Koops: *sniff* I miss Koopie Koo. I miss Petalburg. I miss everything.

Parakarry: Hey, calm down, Koops. Everything's going to be all right. We just need to win the immunity challenge,  all right? Fight for Koopie Koo. Bring her and your hometown justice.

Koops: *sniff*... All right.

Koops grabs a tissue and blows into it like a trumpet.

Koops: Let's do this!

Parakarry, Mailman: Koops told me he misses Koopie Koo. I know what he's going through. So I might not vote for him. Maybe Bow? She's pretty useless since the merge is so soon.

Immunity Challenge

N. Gin: You made sure to send Airmail, right?

Ella: Uh...

N. Gin: Never mind; look, they're coming anyway.

The three hosts are on a frozen ocean. The two tribes walk up.

N. Gin: I'll take the Lumaris miniature, please.

Rawk Hawk tosses it to N. Gin.

N. Gin: Ok, here's the task, the rules are simple. When we give the signal the ice is going to be cut so that you will be standing on a platform in the middle of the water. Then you jkust need to get each other off any way you can. Last tribe with a member standing on the platform, wins. Got it?

The two tribes nod.

N. Gin: Terrible Tribe, you have one man too many, who's going to sit out?

Cheep Cheep: I will.

N. Gin: Okay, make the circle.

The three hosts and Cheep Cheep make a giant circle around the contestants. Lasers come out of the ocean and cut the circle and soon the rest of the ice floats away. Each host has or her own mound of ice.

N. Gin: Survivors Ready...? GO!

Koops and Parakarry get in their shells and charge to the other side. Lakitu tries to stop them by throwing Spinies, but Koops and Parakarry easily knock them back. They jump up and kick Lakitu off the platform.

Petey: Oh no you don't!

Petey spews mud on Koops, making him fall off the platform.

Bow: Gotcha!

Bow appears in front of Petey and slaps him. Petey stumbles off the platform.

Rawk Hawk: Let's RAWK these guys!

Rawk Hawk starts charging toward Michael Tarver, but Michael Tarver is ready.

Michael Tarver: Tarver-

Rawk Hawk: RAWK!

Michael Tarver grabs Rawk Hawk to bodyslam him, but Rawk Hawk lands on his feet and tosses Michael Tarver off the platform.

Birdo: Hi.

Birdo hits Rawk Hawk in the back of the head with an egg. He falls off the platform.

Parakarry: YAH!

Parakarry hits Birdo in the nose, but gets stuck. They both fall off the platform. This leaves Bandit, Bow, and Bombette and Rawk Hawk.

Rawk Hawk: RAWWWWW!

Bandit slashes Rawk Hawk's arm.

Rawk Hawk: YOUCH!

Rawk Hawk grabs his arm and accidentally slides off the platform.

Bandit: Come on. I know you're here.

Bow appears in front of Bandit.

Bow: BOO!

Bandit: YIPES!

Bandit backs into Bombette, who explodes, making her and Bandit fly off the platform.

N. Gin: Paper Powers win immunity!

Paper Powers: YAY!

Bow: I'm the sole survivor of this game! And I'll be the sole survivor of this entire show!

N. Gin: Here's the immunity idol.

N. Gin hands Bow the Lumaris miniature.

Tribal Council

The entire tribe comes in. N. Gin, Ella, and Blueytroopa are still in coats

N. Gin: First off, Petey, who do you think has been helping your tribe the least?

Petey: I would have to say... Cheep Cheep

N. Gin: Michael Tarver, who are you basing your vote on?

Michael Tarver: I play it by ear. That's all I really do.

N. Gin: Finally, Cheep Cheep. I hear your old shelter broke down. What is your take on it?

Cheep Cheep: I personally think the weather in and of itself was the true cause of the shelter falling.

N. Gin: Okay then, time to vote. Ella, would you do the honors?

Ella picks up a stick and hits a big gong with it

N. Gin: ... Ok, that was pretty cool, I'll give you that. Petey, you're up first.

Petey goes to vote.

Petey: Iím not sure about this, but it seems better for us this way.

Michael Tarver goes up to vote, Lakitu goes up to vote.

Lakitu: I should've never have let you join Wario's Apprentice.

Cheep Cheep goes up to vote, Birdo goes up to vote.

Birdo: I remember watching the first season of the American Survivor. So let's see how far I can go with the strategy.

Bandit goes up to vote.

Bandit: I'm sorry, but out of all the people, you just don't match up.

N. Gin: Iíll tally the votes.

Blueytroopa gives N. Gin the box with the votes in it.

N. Gin: First vote... Cheep Cheep.

The camera cuts to Cheep Cheep.

N. Gin: Second vote... Bandit.

Bandit is nonchalant about getting a vote.

N. Gin: Third vote... Bandit.

The camera cuts to a surprised Bandit.

N. Gin: Fourth vote... Petey.

Petey starts to sniffle.

N. Gin: Fifth vote... Lakitu.

Lakitu glares at Petey.

N. Gin: Final vote... Hey, whereís the final vote?

Ella is seen putting something behind her back

Blueytroopa: Ella, give the vote to the mechanical person...

Ella growls before handing N. Gin the vote, which has been folded into a paper airplane

N. Gin: Uhhhhh...

He unfolds it

N. Gin: The vote is... Cheep Cheep... We have a tie. Bandit, please state why you shouldn't go.

Bandit: Not only was I the last person on the platform to represent Terrible Tribe, but Cheep Cheep didn't even compete! Also if I go... the hunting knife goes.

Cheep Cheep: I don't care about the result.

N. Gin: Revote.

Petey goes to vote

Petey: I guess you have to go.

Michael Tarver goes to vote, Lakitu goes to vote.

Lakitu: If I had to choose someone that isn't Petey, it would be you.

Birdo goes to vote.

N. Gin: I'll retally the votes.

Blueytroopa hands N. Gin the votes.

N. Gin: First vote... Bandit.

Bandit is angry.

N. Gin: Second vote... Cheep Cheep.

Cheep Cheep doesn't care.

N. Gin: Third vote... Cheep Cheep.

Cheep Cheep yawns.

N. Gin: Sixth Person voted out of Survivor 2: The REAL Deal is... Cheep Cheep

Cheep Cheep: Not... so... fastÖ

Bandit: What?

Cheep Cheep tosses her Golden Lumaris Trophy to N. Gin.

Bandit: NO!

Cheep Cheep: Yes.

N. Gin: Cheep Cheep has cashed in her Golden Lumaris Trophy. None of today's votes have counted toward her vote. So with only one vote out of the four, the sixth person voted out of Survivor 2: The REAL Deal is... Bandit.

Bandit: You lost your team's greatest asset, I hope you know that, Cheep Cheep!

N. Gin: Bandit, please hand me your torch.

Bandit hands N. Gin his torch. N. Gin flips it upside down and extinguishes it in the snow.

N. Gin: Please whack the person responsible for your elimination.

Bandit whacks his torch on Cheep Cheep.

Cheep Cheep: OW!

N. Gin: You know what to do now.

Bandit makes a face at Cheep Cheep, then goes to the cannon. The rest of Terrible Tribe get in the pipe back to camp

Bandit, Hotel Owner, On Being Voted Out: I was robbed! ... I hate that Cheep Cheep... Speaking of her, here's a little message for her.

Bandit snatches a TV and turns it on. It shows a clip from "It's the Great Pumpkin Charlie Brown".


Bandit, Hotel Owner, On Being Voted Out: I couldn't say it better myself.

Who voted for who?
Bandit: Cheep Cheep (didn't help the team at all)
Birdo: 1st Bandit (decided to copy Sean's strategy from Survivor 1) 2nd Bandit (same)
Cheep Cheep: Bandit  (alliance with Birdo)
Lakitu: 1st Petey (thinks he destroyed shelter) 2nd Cheep Cheep (thought Cheep Cheep was less useful than Bandit)
Michael Tarver:1st Lakitu (decided to continue his past strategy with Ludwig) 2nd Cheep Cheep (thought she didn't do anything helpful)
Petey: 1st Cheep Cheep (thought she didn't help the tribe at all) 2nd Cheep Cheep (same)

Meanwhile with Badyoyo and birby6...

Birby6: Look, Iíve seen Count Bleck sing better than you! Thanks to you, the ďWinter
Wonderland Music VideoĒ was a total bust!

Badyoyo: I agree. Sorry Wendy, but... you're eliminated.

Wendy slaps Badyoyo and runs out to call her lawyer.

Birby6: Is the slapping thing a gag on this show?

Badyoyo: Yes, yes it is.

Birby6: Then I guess the lawyer thing is my gag too.

The cameraman slaps Badyoyo, then goes out to call his lawyer.

Birby6: I spoke too soon.

Read on!

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