Chapter 27: Sun Pun
<Opening: Period, by Chemistry>
The hunt for the Fire Crystal was on for Violet. The hunt for Violet’s heart was on for Boshi. The hunt for a new game was on for P.T. And many others were pursuing goals that could take all day to restate. Francis was behind the creation of Junker X, and Goomp and his friends learned of Goomba’s treachery, yet Ludwig took Goomba’s side. On top of that, King Boo filled the void in Shade’s party left by Victor. After getting the Fire Crystal, Boshi threw P.T. into a lake so he could court Violet uninterrupted. But what of Larry?
Larry, Torpedo Ted, and Pyro Guy are in Toad Town. Specifically, in Dr. Toadley’s clinic only minutes before he goes to buy from Hinopio.
Larry: Hey doctor guy, we need your help. Do you know of any really rocky places that the Earth Crystal could be?
Dr. Toadley: Is the crystal in a rocky place? It is not.
Larry: What?
Dr. Toadley: Is there more to the earth than rocks and mountains? Absolutely! Could the answer lie among the plants? Why, indeed it does!
Pyro Guy: *muffled*?
Dr. Toadley: Is Flower Fields your answer? Yes it is! But can you enter from Toad Town? No you cannot.
Larry: What?! Lame! Why?
Intern: Well when the town got remodeled, Minh T. moved away and the gateway to Flower Fields was taken down. Sorry.
Larry: Gah!
Dr. Toadley: ...
~~~
Dr. Toadley:
Why have you kidnapped me?!
Goomba: It’s all part of my master plan. We’re just getting those fools taken care of, those fools who took down Fawful and sealed away my access to the dark power! They went after Prince Larry’s life!
Dr. Toadley: Did they do that? They did not. Were they trying to save Larry? I believe so.
Goomba: Of course they were! But Ludwig and the entire Koopa Troop won’t ever find out until it’s too late. Then when the public realizes just how messily Ludwig runs his kingdom, it’ll cause chaos and scandal! And it will be my opportune moment! I’ve hired someone to build a robot to capture them. All I need you to do is lure one of the groups to Flower Fields, and I’ll handle the rest.
Dr. Toadley: And if I don’t?
Goomba: Rodrick?
Roderick: It’s actually-
Goomba: AHEM!
Roderick: Ugh...
Hot Roderick
pulls out Birdley in a cage. In the other hand, the road demon holds a
Poison Mushroom.
~~~
Larry: Is there ANY way there?!
Dr. Toadley: Is there a specialist who lives nearby? Yes there is. Does he reside in the run-down, abandoned interview studio? Positively!
Larry: Whatever, let’s just go.
Dr. Toadley: (Do I regret leading them into a trap? More than anything else. Am I relieved that while it is a trap, the Earth Crystal is definitely in Flower Fields? Indeed.)
In the abandoned Interview studio...
Larry: Hello? Anyone home?
Torpedo Ted: I’m a torpedo!
Pyro Guy: *muffled*!
Larry: Yeah Torpedo Ted, seriously!
Torpedo Ted: But I’m a torpedo!
???: What’s all the ruckus?!
A Broozer comes out of nowhere.
Larry: Who are you?
Broozer: My name’s Punchy. I live here all alone ever since my old boss quit interviewing a few years ago.
Torpedo Ted: I didn’t know that happened, because I’m-
Punchy: Get out of my house already!
Larry: But wait, we heard you can help us get to Flower Fields!
Punchy: You heard right, that’s exactly what I can do. But first I’ll need a potato chip. Ghosts love potato chips.
Pyro Guy pulls a potato chip out from nowhere.
Larry: I am legitimately worried for you sometimes, Pyro Guy.
Punchy: Good. I’ll take a potato chip... AND EAT IT!
Punchy dramatically takes a bite of the chip.
Punchy: Now what was it again? Oh wait, Flower Fields. Yeah, I can totally help. We have to be on the roof though.
There...
Pyro Guy: *muffled*?
Punchy: Hold your horses! ... Now, it’ll only work if the three of you stick together somehow, so is there anything you can do?
Torpedo Ted: Hold hands?
Larry: No!
Pyro Guy: *muffled*?
Larry: ... I guess that’s the only way.
Soon Pyro Guy is sitting on Torpedo Ted while holding Larry’s shell (which has Larry hiding inside).
Punchy: Okay, now I can take you all to Flower Fields, but I won’t be coming with you.
Torpedo Ted: I don’t get it.
Punchy: PAUNCH!
Punchy punches Torpedo Ted, Pyro Guy, and Larry far off, in the direction of Flower Fields.
Torpedo Ted: TORPEDO AWAY!
Pyro Guy: *muffled scream*!
Larry: AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!
...
The party wakes up in Flower Fields.
Larry: Ow...
Pyro Guy looks around and then claps his hands in glee.
Larry: No, Pyro! No burning! ... Say, why’s it cloudy again? Didn’t King Dad have the broken Puff-Puff Machine or whatever it was reconfigured into a laundry dryer? What gives?
Torpedo Ted: I’m confused, because I’m a torpedo!
Tolielup: Well whatever you do, don’t wake up the Wise Wisterwood! You can only find the Earth Crystal without him being awake!
Lakilester: Uh, guys? You might not want to listen to him. He lies. About everything.
Tolielup: Your hair isn’t blue!
Larry: ... Oh, I get it. So we need to wake the Wise Wisterwood up, then?
Lakilester: Yeah.
Larry: Hey, you betrayed King Dad, ya goody no-shoes! Why haven’t you done anything about this yourself?!
Lakilester: I’m about to get married!
Larry: Ah whatever.
Tolielup: Well it definitely has nothing to do with the clouds!
Larry: Whatever, weed. I’m talking to the freaking Sun!
At the Sun Tower...
Larry: Hey! Sun! Why haven’t you risen yet?! You’re not going all Angry Sun on us, are you?
Sun: Nah, it’s not that... It’s the Puff-Puff Machine. There’s another one.
Larry: What?!
Sun: Yes... It’s really bumming me out. If you could destroy it, that’d be grand. It’s in the same spot as the last one.
Larry: Lame! I’ll just use this paintbrush I swiped from Bowser Jr.
Everything turns tan and motionless as a giant brush paints a circle on the sky. But nothing happens when the scene goes back to normal.
Larry: Stupid wolf goddess and/or her son. They never come when I'm the one that wants them to!
Torpedo Ted: I say we just do what the sun told us!
Larry: Gosh, fine, we’ll do it already!
Soon the trio comes across the Puff-Puff Machine, which is generating clouds like once before.
Larry: This design is completely new to me. What gives?! Is Ludwig holding out on us?!
Torpedo Ted looks at the machine and reads the label.
Torpedo Ted: "P.T. Piranha’s Puff-Puff Machine! Property of P.T. Piranha! Do not touch except for P.T. Piranha! Meant to be destroyed by P.T. Piranha or someone else"!
Larry: ... I’m not even going to ask.
Larry blasts the machine with a fireball and the clouds clear up.
Larry: Well I don’t regret what my dad and... I guess P.T. also did to Flower Fields, but I appreciate that flowers can grow. I am a florist after all. Or botanist. Whichever pleases the Hanagami Monkeys.
Pyro Guy: *muffled*.
Larry: What are you talking about? Of course it’s sunny again!
Torpedo Ted: The clouds are clear, but the sun isn’t up! ... I’m a-
Larry: What?! That freaking Sun, what’s his problem now?!
Back at the Sun Tower...
Larry: Hey Sun! The clouds are gone! Rise already!
Sun: I just tried that, but there’s a metal monster in the clouds that’s keeping me from rising much higher. Can you go up to the Cloudy Climb and settle this? After that I’ll be able to rise and awaken the Wise Wisterwood.
Larry: Ugh, fine already!
At Cloudy Climb....
Larry: Okay, this is where that fatload Huff N. Puff used to live until he... Actually, I have no clue what happened to him.
Torpedo Ted: Hey look!
Everyone looks to find Francis operating a giant cat robot.
Francis: Nerr, you cannot interfere with our plan! King Von Koopa will have that Snifit taken care of. That is if this high-technicaaaaaaaaaal robot doesn’t do it first!
Larry: Oh great, it’s you.
Francis: As you know, Goomba is plotting to get your friends killed, nerr. And then the truth of what really happened at your castle will be revealed. Then Ludwig will look like a mess! Then Goomba can use that moment and things will be schweet for me, I’ll become great!
Pyro Guy: *muffled*!
Francis: I resent that! Prepare to feel the wrath I felt back in Chapter 10, only taken Up To Eleven! Time for a No Holds Barred Beatdown! You crossed the Moral Event Horizon when you threatened my merchandise! It was such a Wall Banger when I-
Larry: QUIT TROPING ALREADY!
Francis: Nerr!
Francis’s robot disappears.
Francis: This robot can do everything I can do! It’s schweet! Prepare to be defeated!
STOMP! STOMP! STOMP!
Larry: I can hear him walking around, but where is he?!
The robot invisibly stomps on Larry and kicks Pyro Guy into Torpedo Ted.
All Three: OW!
Francis: And I’m not turning visible! Good luck fighting me!
Pyro Guy starts spitting fireballs in every direction.
Larry: MY HAIR! AAAAHHHH!!!
Larry runs around in pain and falls off the edge.
Larry: Whoa!
Francis: Fireballs won’t do any good, nerr! This robot is fireproof!
Torpedo Ted: Torpedo Away!
Torpedo Ted rams... right into a cloudy wall.
Francis: Nerr, give it up already! This high-technicaaaaaaal robot is completely unstoppable!
Larry’s voice: Oh, but Francis, even if you’re invisible, you’re not intangible!
Francis: Huh?
Larry’s voice: Sun, now!
The Sun rises high above the battlefield and shines brightly. Everything on the battlefield gets a shadow, including the robot. Now the party can judge where it is.
Torpedo Ted: TORPEDO AWAY!
He flies right into the robot, damaging it and turning it visible before exploding. Francis lands right near the edge.
Francis: No, this wasn’t supposed to happen!
Larry appears on a cloud.
Larry: Sorry Francis, but I guess it was!
Francis: No, I mean scientifically! Because I was invisible, light rays that come off of me don’t get into your eyes, so even if I cast a shadow-
Larry throws a Bob-omb at Francis, blasting him away.
Larry: Shut up!
Francis: MERCYYYYYYYY!!! *twink*
Sun: Now all is well.
The Sun returns to his spot and shines brightly. Pyro Guy looks up as Japanese fanfare plays.
Pyro Guy: *muffled wolf howl*
Down in the fields, the Wise Wisterwood wakes up.
Wise Wisterwood: ... Huh? Oh! It’s sunny again! Thank the Stars!
Torpedo Ted’s voice: No, thank us!
Larry, Pyro Guy, and Torpedo Ted all sit upon a small cloud that lowers to the point where they’re directly across from Wisterwood’s eyes.
Larry: You’ve got to tell us where the Earth Crystal is!
Wise Wisterwood: Are you not the son of the Koopa who once tried to drown these very fields in darkness?
Larry: B-But I just now saved them from another darkness! And with the Earth Crystal I can stop yet another darkness!
Wise Wisterwood: Ah, but if you wish to defeat evil so that you may remain the only evil, just how good are you?
Larry: ... Enough of the fortune cookies, tree! Tell us where the Earth Crystal is!
Wise Wisterwood: ... ACHOO!
The Wise Wisterwood sneezes the Earth Crystal out into a bed of flowers in front of him. The weirdest part is that he lacks a nose.
Wise Wisterwood: It’s all yours. Just take my words to heart, young Koopa.
Larry: Whatever... 3, 2, 1, NOT IT!
Pyro Guy: *muffled, but he said “not it”*
Torpedo Ted: Aww, but I’m a torpedo! ... Fine...
Torpedo Ted goes to get the Earth Crystal from the bed of flowers.
Larry: Well Pyro Guy, we’ve got to figure out this whole situation with Goomba and Ludwig. But since we’re on a cloud, I say we can use this to get to Sky Land.
Pyro Guy: *muffled*.
Larry: Yeah, let’s go.
The cloud carries the two off.
Torpedo Ted: Torpedo Away!
He follows them.
Larry: Okay, I’ll bite, why does P.T. have a Puff-Puff Machine?
Torpedo Ted: Tin Mario reference.
Larry: Ah.
Chapter 28: Joke’s Over
Larry, Pyro Guy, and Torpedo Ted learned the hard way how to get to Flower Fields. But in order to find the Earth Crystal, they needed to wake up the Wise Wisterwood to figure out how to get it. And the only way to wake him up was to clear the clouds and let the Sun shine. With Goomba and Francis having plans to kill the party at every step, it was a victory well earned.
Out on the Oho Ocean, an orange Luma is guiding a small ship towards Joke’s End.
Mario: So this is where the-a Water Crystal is? Thank a-you so much!
Co-Star Luma disappears like if the second player stopped playing.
Bobbery: Well, we got here without any problems, old bean. But from what you’ve told me of this place, our work may be cut out for us...
Rudy: Well I say we just do this thing already! Yeah!
Rudy hops onto the shore and runs up to the front door of the place. A spirit appears.
Jojora: Hmmph! Go away! You look like that uncool nerd that just came the other day! Are you his friend or something?
Rudy: I’m the uncoolest and nerdiest person I know, so... Well there’s Francis, but he’s back in the Bitlands.
Jojora: Whatever!
Jojora waves her staff and Rudy falls down a trapdoor.
Rudy: HEY!
Mario and Bobbery walk up to the scene.
Bobbery: I say, what’s the meaning of this?!
Jojora: Ew, two old guys! ... Hey! One of you is that jerk who totally ruined my day all those years ago! Why are you here?!
Mario explains in Italian-sounding gibberish.
Jojora: Hmmph, like I care about what you want! You didn’t care about what I wanted!
Bobbery: Madame, could you please find it within your heart to spare your crystal to us so that we may save the world?
Jojora: Teehee! I’ve never been called “madame” before! ... Tell you what, if you and Mr. Mustache can BEHAVE YOURSELVES at my tea party on the top floor then you can have the crystal. I’ll even give that guy back to you. Deal?
Bobbery: I say, Mario, whatever did you do to this lass?
Mario: She attacked my a-brother and I with a snow monster.
Jojora: That “snow monster” happens to be my best- er... No. We had a falling out. She’s not my friend anymore... But I have a new friend and he’d love to come to my party! He won’t leave me like that last one did! Come on inside already!
Jojora fades away and the door opens.
Bobbery: Well, I suppose we should go on in.
Mario: Okeydokey.
Mario and Bobbery enter the building. To Mario’s surprise, the interior has been redesigned over the past few years. A lot of pieces of walls are missing and none of the monsters are around.
Mario: This place-a sure has changed since a-my last visit...
On the stairs up though, they pass a familiar face.
Beanish Meteorologist: Oh, hello Red Man. I see you’ve returned.
Mario: Hi!
Meanwhile in the dungeon...
Rudy: Aw man, I can’t believe I’m in an ice dungeon! What am I, a princess?!
Other prisoner: It could be worse.
Rudy: I guess you’re right, Toadbert.
Toadbert: That I am, by boogity!
Rudy: We just need to find a way out of here.
Toadbert: There is no way out of here, though. Unless you can melt ice.
Rudy: ... Duh!
Rudy takes out a fire potion and throws it at the bars.
Rudy: Now I’m thinking with potions! I’m gone!
Toadbert: I’m going too, by boogity!
Rudy: Okay.
At the top...
Jojora: Okay, now that we all have our tea, we can invite my friend. Brent, it’s time for the party!
A baseball hits Mario in the face.
Mario: Mamamia!
A green Baseball Boy staggers into the room, looking hypnotized.
Brent: Tea... party...
Jojora: Everyone, this is Brent. Brent, why don’t you make these two feel welcome?
Brent: Welcome... to die...
Brent whips out a baseball bat and leaps towards Mario and Bobbery.
Bobbery: WHAT IN BLAZES?!
Mario: Not again!
Jojora floats down to Bobbery’s level and begins charging her wand.
Jojora: Ha!
Bobbery: Ma’am, whatever you are trying to do here is-
Mario throws a fireball that knocks the wand out of the spirit’s hand from a distance.
Jojora: You big creep, stop doing that! I hate you!
Rudy and Toadbert break into the room.
Toadbert: I told you they were at the top, by boogity. Mario, watch out! That little girl likes to lure people here and then kill them!
Mario: Toadbert?
Rudy: Brent?
Brent: ... Rudy?
Jojora: Brent!
Brent: ... Jojora?
Bobbery: Rudy...?
Rudy: Bobbery?
Bobbery: Brent?
Rudy: Brent.
Brett: Myself.
Jojora: No, we’re not doing that joke! Brent, you know the nerdy prisoner?
Brent is back from his zombie-like state after seeing Rudy.
Brent: Oh yeah, totally, he’s one of my best friends!
Jojora: But... I’m your best friend now!
Brent: Uh NO! My baseball team got shipwrecked, I washed up on the shore, and you brainwashed me because you were so desperate for a friend!
Toadbert: And then when the Royal Rescue Team- which I am proudly associated with, by boogity- came to find Brent, you had me locked up in your cell!
Rudy: And I’m still quite foggy on how I got to be considered worth throwing in there.
Jojora: No Brent, you can’t do that to me! I’ll be all alone!
Brent: Look lady, why don’t you just make up with your snow monster friend or something?
Jojora: No! Nonononononono! You’re not all going to leave me all by myself! I’m not going to be alone again!
Rudy: Hey, it’ll be all right! You know what they say- When life gives you lemons-
Jojora: BURN LIFE’S HOUSE DOWN! WITH THE LEMONS! MARIO! I HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE YOU!
Kefka: ?
Jojora somehow makes her staff come back to her and then transforms into what looks like Bonechill, only more bean-like.
Jojora: YOU’RE ALL GOING TO STAY HERE FOREVER!
Brent: Do not want!
Rudy: What a drama queen. Come on, Mario, you and Bobbery can whoop her just like you whooped my former boss!
Toadbert: By boogity, you can take her on!
Beanish Meteorologist: I say, have any of you seen the restroom around here? I have to use the restroom.
Toadbert: I believe you missed it on the way up.
Beanish Meteorologist: Drat, that’s just like me.
Jojora spits a giant snowball at the door so the man can’t leave.
Jojora: NO, YOU WON’T LEAVE ME LIKE CHUCKLISSA, OHOLINA, HOOHOOLIA, AND TEEHEENA DID! YOU WON’T!
Rudy: Mario, what are you waiting for?!
Mario: But a-Jojora, why did your friend leave you?
The beast ignores the question and slams her Bonechill-like claw on the ground where Mario was. The plumber dodges, but now there’s a hole in the ground where he was.
Jojora: YOU RUINED MY LIFE WHEN YOU RUINED THAT PARTY, NOW YOUR GAME WILL END!
She tries to take a bite out of Mario, Rudy, and Bobbery. However something hits her from behind. It’s Brett with a baseball.
Brett: Remember me?!
Jojora: BRETT!
She manages to grab and swallow him.
Brett: Lame!
He swings his bat at her ribcage from inside.
Brett: I guess you could say it’s a... batting cage!
Beanish Meteorologist: That’s the worst joke I’ve heard in my life.
Toadbert: Fitting that it’s told in the graveyard of bad jokes.
Bobbery: Why, that gives me an idea!
Bobbery hops into Jojora’s cannon and explodes, causing the beast to fall over.
Jojora: MY CANNON!
Brett weasels his way out through the ribcage and joins his friends.
Brett: Easy as pie!
Jojora forces herself onto her ribcage stomach and grabs both Brett and Bobbery. She’s holding Bobbery by the fuse so he can’t light it and explode.
Jojora: IT’S GAME OVER FOR YOU CREEPS!
Bobbery: Mario, I say, could you please do something?
Mario: ... Yes-a. I’ve been a-listening the whole time, and I a-figured out how to solve this.
Rudy/Brett: Then get on with it!
Mario: Jojora?
Jojora: NOW WHAT?!
Mario: I’m a-sorry.
Jojora: ... WHAT?! ... NO, YOU CAN’T BE SORRY, THEN I CAN’T... NO... AAAHHH.... WHAAAT... AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!
FLASH!
Suddenly all that’s left of Jokes’ End is the regular island, with the building having been replaced by a big, flat ice platform. Everyone is still there and Jojora is sitting on the ground, back to normal.
Jojora: ... W-What?
Mario: I’m-a sorry for a-ruining everything.
Jojora: ...... Thank you...
Brett: Hold on, I’m confused. She attacks you after all your hard work, throws a temper tantrum for three years, but you’re the one to blame?
Beanish Meteorologist: I don’t get it.
Mario: It’s a-quite simple, actually.
Jojora: No Mario, I guess I’ll tell them...
~~~
I don’t remember
the early parts of my life. I just knew that I somehow ended up here at
Jokes’ End. No one ever came to visit, so I was always alone. When Mario
and Luigi came, I wanted them to stay forever. So the only thing I could
do was hospitalize them in the battle alongside a monster I made to pretend
to be my friend, so that they could stay longer. I was good at not coming
off as needy. When Mario and Luigi defeated my friend, that was it... I’d
be alone again.
A while later
some dark wave came over the land and this weird guy in an overcoat came,
but all he did was fight me. And later I was brainwashed into helping an
evil wizard or something. For a short time I had friends again, but it
didn’t last. So for three years all I could think about was how alone I
was... and how Mario and Luigi made me realize it... I was mad and lonely
at the same time. I didn’t know what to do...
~~~
Toadbert: Well, what a surprisingly serious background in what’s supposed to be a comedy/adventure Fun Fic.
Beanish Meteorologist: I say, all my time here and I never knew someone was living here until today.
Bobbery: Well by Garland’s goatee, this is certainly odd.
Brett: Uh, what about the monsters and the redesigning?
Jojora: The monsters were an illusion. But the renovations were made to make it easier to get to my room so more people could’ve come to play... but no one did until today...
Mario: What-a happened to the place now?
Jojora: This is what Joke’s End is supposed to look like. But a long, long time ago this blue crystal appeared and boosted my ice power. I created the whole place.
Rudy: Wait, didn’t you say that your friend’s ancestor owned the place, though, or something like that?
Jojora: I was lying...
Brett: All these questions; what is this, a Lemmy’s Land Interview?!
Bobbery: Where is the Water Crystal?
Jojora: A-A-Are you just going to take it and then leave me all alone?
Toadbert: By boogity, I’ll be your friend! If you promise to stop being so hostile.
Jojora: You will?
Toadbert: Sure!
Brett: Yeah, I’ll do it.
Rudy: Me too.
Bobbery: I say, full speed ahead.
Mario: Okeydokey!
Beanish Meteorologist: Here, here!
Jojora: Yay! I’ll go get the Water Crystal!
Jojora goes off behind a statue and gets the Water Crystal.
Jojora: There you go!
The spirit hands Mario the Water Crystal and he holds it like a Crystal Star.
YOU GOT THE
WATER CRYSTAL!
Mario didn’t
learn any Special Attacks in particular!
END OF CHAPTER!
Mario: Wahoo!
And so Mario and friends made friends with the lonely ice spirit Jojora of Joke’s End. With three of the four crystals found, all that remained was to head to Sky Land to find the Wind Crystal and fight Shadoo. But it won’t be easy for Mario, Bobbery, Rudy, and everyone else. What will happen next? This!
P.T.’s body floats up to the shore.
P.T.: Sheesh, finally! Stupid Sugar Pirates throwing me overboard...
Rudy: P.T.?!
P.T.: Yeah, I found out you’d be here. Rudy, Boshi’s being mean to me! He threw me in a lake so he could have alone time with Violet while they went to Sky Land! Can I come with you guys?!
Rudy: Okay. Mario, how do we get to Sky Land from here, anyway?
Mario: Don’t-a
worry, Rudy. I have a plan...
Chapter 29....
Mario’s group went to Joke’s End to find the Water Crystal, meeting a few faces when they got there. Their host, Jojora, was going crazy because as it turned out, she was hopelessly lonely. After calming her rage, the Water Crystal was given to the heroes, then P.T. appeared to tell on Boshi. What will happen next?
Toadbert: So what happens next?
Rudy: I think this is the part where we go to Sky Land.
Mario: This is a-the part where we a-go to Sky Land.
CHAPTER 29 - THE PART WHERE THEY GO TO SKY LAND
Lakithunder is flying around Sky Land until he notices something.
Lakithunder: Hey Bro, I found him!
Army Hammer Brother walks up to Lakithunder and notices the findings.
Army: Oh my...
Meanwhile in Koopa Castle...
BANG!
Koopatrol: OW!
A cannonball has knocked the Koopatrol out. He was guarding the cell with the Toads and co.
Petey: Ha!
Blue Toad: You guys? From Larry’s castle?
Blooper: Hey!
Fin: If there’s anything I can do, it’s picking locks!
Fin picks the cell’s lock, freeing the Toads, Poochy, Goomp, Guy, and Paraplonk.
King Boo: Come on, we know you know the truth about the conspiracy. We need to assemble an army of our own!
Goomp: Huh?
Shade: We’re making an army to fight the forces of Shadoo and possibly Goomba. We’re going to find Larry, Violet, and the others when they get all the crystals, and we’re going to help them!
Paraplonk: Okay.
Guy: Sure.
Poochy: Arf!
Meanwhile at Joke’s End...
P.T.: Hey, thanks for fixing up my leg.
Toadbert: No worries, by boogity!
Bobbery: Mario, how do we get to Sky Land from here?
Mario: I don’t-a know, actually...
Jojora: I know how you can get there! Watch!
Jojora saps some power from the Water Crystal and makes an ice cannon.
Jojora: It’ll take you anywhere you want to go!
Mario: Just what I-a needed!
Jojora: But only one at a time can fit in.
Bobbery: Fair enough, I suppose.
Brent: See ya around, Rudy.
Rudy: You’re not coming?
Brent: Nah, I’ve got to get back to my team, and Jojora wants to come with.
Toadbert: I’ll come!
Brent: Toadbert, I think you’d just get in the way.
Beanish Meteorologist: Indubitably.
Toadbert: Aww boogity.
Mario gets into the cannon and blasts off into Sky Land, followed by Bobbery, Rudy, then P.T. However they’re not the first ones in Sky Land.
Boshi/Violet: AAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!
They’re being chased around by a few Fire Chomps.
Torpedo Ted’s voice: TORPEDO WHIRLWIND!
Violet and Boshi are carried by a small tornado all the way to a small platform that has Larry, Pyro Guy, and Torpedo Ted on it.
Violet: It’s you!
Larry: Yeah. Guess what I found out about Goomba?
Boshi: What?
Larry: Well it turns out-
Meanwhile, in another area of Sky Land...
Lakithunder: Victor, what happened to you?
Victor: ... How did you find me?
Army Hammer Bro.: We saw you unconscious. What happened?
Victor: ...
~~~
After Fawful
was defeated, the Shy Guy and his friends took me to Yoshi’s Tropical Island.
But while they were messing around, I caught wind of Shadoo’s plans. So
I searched for him. Bringing them along would just slow me down.
I tracked him
down here, but he turned into the shape of Mr. L and beat me to a pulp.
It was very easy to do a lot of damage to him, but he took advantage of
the fact that I was still a bit tired from facing the Junker in Windmillville,
and then whatever I don’t remember from Larry’s castle. You must’ve found
me after that...
~~~
Army: They must’ve caught on.
Victor: What?
Lakithunder: We passed a few guys fighting Shadoo a while ago.
Victor: ... Why did you find me?
Army: I’ve seen through Goomba’s lie. I’ve witnessed exactly 1,000 failed assassination attempts on the royal Koopa family. And Goomba didn’t count on something I’ve picked up from seeing all those times.
Lakithunder: That no one would ever dare go after the Grass Land castle. It’s too near the Mario Bros.’ house.
Victor: ... So now what?
Army: Well I tried to explain things to Ludwig, but a giant trash can robot got in the way and this nerd told me that Ludwig fled in an airship, so I’m just gonna beat up Shadoo.
Meanwhile with Shade and the others...
Shade: Attack!
Shadoo (shaped like Mr. L) is jumping around a cloudy battlefield while Fin and Blooper are firing from a Banzai Blaster stolen from the nearby castles.
Petey: Got ya!
King Boo: Te tengo!
They grab Shadoo by the feet.
Shadoo: Aw crud...
Shadoo is hit by the Banzai Bill... as are Petey and King Boo.
All three: AAAAH!!!
Blooper rams Shadoo like a torpedo.
Shadoo: RRRR!
He’s hit with another Banzai Bill.
Shadoo: COME ON ALREADY!
He creates a box around the Banzai Blaster, which then explodes, destroying the cannon.
Shade: Dang it.
Fin: You know, for making all those plans, he’s not really the best fighter.
Shade: Yeah, but he keeps dodging attacks... Wait! I have an idea! World 9 is above this place, right?
Fin: About.
Shade: Then go there, that’s the last world in New Super Mario Bros. Wii! There’s bound to be something in that level that can hurt this guy!
Fin: Make Petey do it, he can fly!
Petey’s voice: Why me?!
Blooper’s voice: Oh for the love of cheese, I’ll do it!
Shadoo: Not if I stop you!
He’s struck by a bolt of lightning.
Shadoo: PAIN!
Lakithunder: Ha!
Army: Got ‘im!
Victor: Hmph.
Shade: Hey Victor, you’re back!
Victor: Looks like we’re winning.
Shade: Yeah. We didn’t even need those Toads and Koopa guys to form an army after all.
Fin: I guess we’ll tell them that when they come back with the army.
Elsewhere...
Boshi: Okay guys, so it looks like Ludwig’s castle is right there. We break in, take the Wind Crystal, find Shadoo, and get out.
Larry: Don’t we kind of need a strategy?
Boshi: Eh, how much damage has winging it done to us before? We’re still alive.
Mario: I can a-handle the Koopa Troop any a-day of the week. No offence-a.
Larry: Eh, I am in charge of World 1, so my guys are pretty weak...
Violet: B-But this is where the king himself stays!
Torpedo Ted: Hey wait, what’s Mario doing here?
Everyone notices that Mario, Rudy, and Bobbery are there.
Violet/Boshi/Larry/Pyro Guy: !!!
P.T. runs up to the group.
P.T.: Hey Mario, Rudy, and Bob-omb guy! I just checked, no one’s at the castle except for Francis!
Everyone else: What?!
Larry: Francis?! We just dealt with him in Flower Fields! Well I guess we should get the Wind Crystal from him...
P.T.: Nah, I asked him, he said Ludwig has it on his airship.
Violet: How did you get the information out of him?
P.T.: I remember it like it was yesterday...
Rudy: You only just now-
P.T.: LIKE IT WAS YESTERDAY, JERK!
~~~
Francis: Okay!
Okay! I’ll talk, nerr! Just don’t make me watch the English dub of that
show anymore!
P.T.: Is it really that bad?
Francis: No! But being such a weaboo, I shun everything in English, nerr! Ludwig’s got the Wind Crystal! He’s fled onto his hi-technicaaaaaaaaal airship! Now stop the DVD already!!!
P.T.: Sheesh, fine.
Francis: Schweet.
~~~
P.T.: Good times...
Pyro Guy: *muffled*?
Bobbery: That’s a good question. How exactly are we planning on getting to the ship?
Larry: Yeah, we don’t have that Broozer from the interview studio to help us this time.
P.T.: You saw Punchy?
Pyro Guy: ... *muffled*!
Boshi: I... guess it will work?
Soon P.T. is carrying Torpedo Ted. Boshi is sitting on Torpedo Ted while Violet and Rudy sit on Boshi. Violet holds Bobbery while Rudy holds Larry’s shell.
P.T.: MY ARMS ARE KILLING ME!
Torpedo Ted: TORPEDO AWAY!
Torpedo Ted takes off, carrying everyone. Meanwhile, Mario is using a Propeller Mushroom.
Mario: Hurry up-a, Snifit!
Pyro Guy just stands at the edge of the clouds. He turns around backwards and sneezes.
Pyro Guy: *muffled sneeze*
The sneeze is so powerful that it launches Pyro Guy into the distance like a rocket.
Pyro Guy: *muffled evil laughter*
Ludwig’s airship is just ahead of them. Now it’s time to get the Wind Crystal and finally go after Shadoo.
Rudy: We’re coming, Goomba!
Bobbery: Your lies will come to an end at once!
P.T.: Whee!
<Ending: Shunkan Sentimental, by Scandal>
Blooper: I’ve found it! This’ll kill Shadoo for sure! It might be messy, but it’ll do. Now I just need to get it to convert it so it’ll home in on Shadoo all the time.
To Be Continued…
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