Narrator: We begin our story around Christmas. I tell you the tale of how one who hated Christmas came to love it so. We go back to Christmas Eve many years ago in a place called Bowser’s castle.
Hammer Bro: Ok ok, a little to the left… and good.
Several Paratroopas are hanging up a Christmas wreath in the throne room of Bowser’s castle. They fly away after hanging it up, and a Paragoomba hammers a nail where the wreath is.
Hammer Bro: Ok guys, let’s move to the great hall to work on the Christmas tree. Hey, by the way, Larry, why couldn’t we just do this on Black Friday?
Larry: Because Dad hates Christmas and thinks it’s a waste of time.
Hammer Bro, looking surprised, walks along the corridor with Larry. He pulls out a clipboard with a checklist.
Hammer Bro: Why would anyone hate Christmas? There’s snow, the Nativity, Santa Claus, and presents; why would anyone not like those four things?
Larry: I don’t know why myself. He’s making us work even during the holidays. It’s driving my mother crazy as well as most of my siblings. It seems only Lemmy doesn’t mind his decision because he works his tail off with Ice Land’s economy anyway.
They come to the great hall where many minions are decorating the walls and tables. A large, undecorated Christmas tree is sitting near the back near the window.
Hammer Bro: That makes things gloomy around here. I’m not blaming our king of course, heh heh…
The Hammer Bro walks away to assist the minions decorating the tree, while Larry walks back to his room. Clawdia walks out with a turkey in her claws.
Clawdia: I have our Christmas feast prepared; all we need now are the kids.
The minions pause for a moment to get a sniff of the turkey before going back to work. Bowser walks into the Great Hall in an angry mood.
Bowser: What are you doing?!
Clawdia: We are setting up for Christmas, darling.
Bowser gives Clawdia an angry look.
Bowser: Bah Humbug! Who needs Christmas when we can takeover the world?
Clawdia: But Christmas is a time for resting and being with our friends and family. It is a time of joy!
Bowser smiles slightly.
Bowser: Honey, you know what gives me joy! Getting rid of those stupid, hairy-lipped plumbers that are Mario and Luigi! Bah Humbug! Now get back to work!
Bowser frowns as he says that. He stomps out of the great hall.
Clawdia: Just continue to decorate, and don’t mind my husband.
The minions exchange worried glances but continue to decorate.
Several hours later…
The decorating is finished. The great hall’s Christmas tree has been decorated with colored light and ornaments, and on top lays a star. On the walls are hangings of snowmen and reindeer as well as Santa Claus. In the back is a Nativity scene with glowing lights. The Koopalings, Clawdia, Bowser, and his minions (including Goombas, Koopa Troopas, Hammer Bros, Koopatrols, and Magikoopas) have all gathered. Kamek and Kammy Koopa are seated near the front table with the Christmas dinner. Clawdia rises…
Clawdia: We must say grace.
Everyone but Bowser rises. Bowser is snacking on the turkey.
Clawdia: Bowser, please rise!
Bowser continues to eat, stopping only to throw a turkey leg at Clawdia.
Clawdia: What is the matter with you?!
Clawdia’s expression soon turns angry. Bowser rises up.
Bowser: Bah Humbug! I hate Christmas and I hate you!
Clawdia tears up. Bowser walks over to the Christmas tree.
Bowser: What’s so fun about putting stuff under a tree? It’s stupid, that’s what! Bah Humbug!
Bowser grabs an ornament and throws it. It happens to hit Morton in the eye, and he starts crying.
Bowser: Take your useless ornaments and eat them!
Bowser throws multiple ornaments at random, hitting various minions.
Bowser: I say Bah Humbug to this stupid tree!
Bowser breathes fire on the tree and sets it on fire. The burning tree falls down and ornaments shatter and the star on top splits in two.
Clawdia: I hate you, Bowser! I thought I would never say this!
Clawdia walks out sobbing. Bowser grabs the tree and throws it at the table. Bowser gets a baseball bat and starts beating on it. Bowser soon gets tired of beating on it, and walks upstairs to bed while the minions are forced to clean up the broken ornaments and pour water on the burning tree.
Bowser: I hate Christmas!
Bowser walks up to his bedroom on the castle’s 5th floor. Bowser shuts the door and locks it. He then turns on the heater in his room and prepares for bed. A noise is heard.
Bowser: GO AWAY!
A little spooked, Bowser pulls down the curtains of his window, swearing he saw a Boo’s face.
Bowser: It’s nothing, Bowser! Just move on with it.
Bowser turns out the light and seeds a Boo’s face. Bowser gasps.
Boo: You are Bowser Koopa, correct?
Bowser: Yes! What do you want?!
Boo: I am here to tell you about what is to come for you tonight.
Bowser: Like what?!
Boo gives Bowser a stern look.
Boo: I despised Christmas as much as you do now, Bowser, and now I am regretful. I am forced to roam this world because of how selfish I was when I was still alive.
Bowser: Bah! Bah Humbug, I say to you! What does your past have to do with anything?
Boo lets out a deathly scream, forcing Bowser to cover his ears. The Boo’s eyes become red.
Boo: What I am saying is that if you continue your selfish ways you will be cursed to roam this earth as a lowly spirit. I will warn you of one thing.
Bowser: What is it?
Boo: You will be greeted by three spirits, which is all I can say on this matter.
Bowser: How come?
Boo: Certain regulations, Bowser. I may lose my spirit form for telling you so. That fate is worse than death, I assure you! Do not fret though, if you do what the spirits ask of you, then you might just be saved. Goodbye now!
The Boo disappears, leaving Bowser confused. Bowser soon loses consciousness and falls asleep. He awakes later. It is dark outside and it appears everyone has gone to bed.
Bowser: What time is it?
He looks up at the clock.
Bowser: One o’clock!
A ghost is standing behind Bowser.
Ghost: Hello King Bowser!
Bowser, startled, turns around to find that the ghost of a Koopa troopa.
Bowser: Who are you? And aren’t you supposed to become a Boo or Dry Bones when you die?
Koopa Troopa: Well yes, but I am a different kind of spirit, one that retains the form it had in life instead of becoming a Boo or Dry Bones like most souls do when they die.
Bowser: That’s weird! By the way, what is your name?
Koopa Troopa: I am the Ghost of Christmas Past.
Bowser: Christmas past?
Koopa Troopa: Not just Christmas past itself - your past, Bowser.
The ghost of the Koopa Troopa is wearing a white robe and holding an ancient book in his hand. It wears a crown of roses. A small light is coming out of its head.
Bowser: What’s that light? Can you get that to go away?
Koopa Troopa: That is the reason I am here! I have a cap to seal it up, but I would disappear with it on.
Bowser: Why are you here then?
Koopa Troopa: To show you your past Christmases.
Bowser: Past Christmases?
Koopa Troopa: You shall see. I will show what Christmas has been like for you over the years. Now let’s begin!
The Koopa Troopa snaps his finger and Bowser is surrounded by light and feels like he is falling until he reaches a new place. He recognizes the room immediately, and sees it is the same room of his castle as they were just in moments earlier. Bowser gives the ghost an angry look
Bowser: What kind of trick are you pulling here, buddy?!
The Koopa Troopa ghost remains silent. The door opens to reveal a young Bowser about 3 years old. He looks beat up and sad. Bowser recognizes what he is seeing, and sobs. A large Koopa walks in.
Morton Sr: Bowser! Pack your things! I’m sending you to live with Kamek on Yoshi’s Island for awhile!
Young Bowser: Yes sir! By the way, Dad, what’s my Christmas present?
Morton Sr. frowns
Morton Sr: What do you want?!
Bowser: Well I would like a train for Christmas, Dad. You know, like the ones they show on TV!
Morton Sr: How much is it?
Bowser: It’s 400 coins, but if it’s too much to pay for, Santa can bring it.
Morton Sr. makes a fist.
Morton Sr: I can’t get it! It’s too expensive!
Bowser: I said Santa Claus could get it.
Morton Sr. pounds the wall
Morton Sr: You idiot! You know that Santa Claus isn’t real! He’s just an icon for stores like Wal-Mart to persuade you to Christmas shop! How could one so fat fly around the world in one night on time?! Let alone fit through a chimney?! He’s a fake!
The younger Bowser starts to cry, as does the adult Bowser watching this scene. The Troopa ghost only watches.
Red Koopa: Don’t worry, kids! Santa Claus does indeed exist!
Bowser: My father was so mean at Christmas every year before his death!
Troopa Ghost: Are you not the same way to your own children? I do recall you threw a Christmas ornament at your son.
Bowser: Yes…
Bowser said this low and regretfully, to the point that the Koopa Troopa could barely hear.
Troopa Ghost: Let’s fast forward 13 years, shall we?
The ghost snaps his finger once more and Bowser is absorbed by light. He soon sees a schoolyard Bowser fall on his back but then get up.
Bowser: I remember this place! This was where I went to high school!
Ghost: Yes, but you never return, do you?
Bully: See you back home, LOSER! If your dad remembers you!
The bully flicks a booger on Bowser. He has a Paratroopa pick him up to take him home. A young, 16-year-old Bowser is sitting on the steps reading a book. School was let out 30 minutes prior for the Christmas holidays. The present day Bowser has a stunned look on his face. A girl Koopa walks up to the young Bowser.
Koopa: Where are you going for Christmas?
Bowser: I was supposed to be picked up by my dad, but he must have forgotten me.
Koopa: What’s your name?
Bowser: I’m Prince Bowser! I’m second in line for the Koopa throne! By the way, what’s your name?
Koopa: I’m Clawdia! Nice too meet you, Prince Bowser!
Bowser: Just call me Bowser! By the way, why are you here?
Clawdia: I’m here to grab a book I forgot. Are you going to get picked up?
Bowser: Probably not, my dad doesn’t like me that much. He said that Santa Claus isn’t real! I don’t believe him!
Clawdia: That’s terrible! I’d hate to have a dad like yours! Since no one will pick you up, you can come to my house for Christmas. My parents won’t mind
Bowser: Thanks! You said you were missing a book, didn’t you?
Clawdia: Yes, but I don’t need it anyway! Come on!
Clawdia grabs Bowser’s hand and they take a warp pipe to Clawdia’s house. Adult Bowser smiles slightly.
Koopa Troopa Ghost: Wasn’t that kind of her to take you to her house for Christmas?
Bowser: Yes, it was nice of her to do that.
Ghost: Yet you were mean to her about Christmas!
Bowser: Yes.
Bowser sobs right after he says it.
Ghost: We must move on!
The Koopa Troopa ghost snaps his fingers, and Bowser is magically warped to a castle, his own.
Bowser: I’m back! I’m home!
Bowser sees himself again and realizes what is going on.
Bowser: Can we leave?!
This younger Bowser is fighting Mario.
Mario: Bowser! Give me a break! Even for Christmas!
Bowser: Never! HAHA!
Bowser grabs Mario by the neck. Mario starts struggling, Bowser doesn’t know Peach is behind him with a frying pan. Peach whacks Bowser with the frying pan. Bowser releases Mario and falls to the ground, clutching his head.
Peach: That’s better!
Mario gasps for air and recovers.
Mario: Can I ever get a break?
Bowser: No! I’m always thinking of kidnapping 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, and 365 days a year!
Peach: Yet you’ll never win me over, dodo head!
Bowser: How did you get out of my cell?
Peach: I know that cell by now! I found a way out of there! I spend a third of my life in there!
Bowser: I hate Christmas and I hate Mario!
Peach: I’ll never marry you, squirrel brain! You’ve changed a lot and I can’t stand it!
Bowser (present day): Can we leave?!
Koopa Troopa Ghost: Fine!
Bowser becomes dizzy as he is sent spinning in the light, finally finding himself back in his bedroom.
Koopa Troopa: See what you have become over the years? You have been abused by your father at home and bullies at school. The late Morton Sr’s hatred of Christmas has transferred to you.
Bowser: I know I have been mean lately, and I regret it.
Koopa Troopa: My time is short, Bowser! Two more ghosts will visit you. You will learn more about your feelings and how they have been hurt.
Bowser: I didn’t want to see that last one!
Koopa Troopa: You must learn from your past mistakes!
Bowser: I don’t want to talk about it!
Bowser grabs the hat and puts it on the ghost’s head
Koopa Troopa: Stop! Learn from the past and use what you have learned in the present!
Bowser: What?
By this time the cap has taken away all the light, causing the Koopa Troopa ghost to disappear.
Bowser: Learn from my past? To use in the present? Maybe I should have let him finish talking.
Bowser starts feeling sleepy and again falls down on his bed into a deep sleep. Later he awakes again. He looks at the clock and sees it is one.
Bowser: Are these ghosts really real? Or am I dreaming?
Voice: You are not dreaming, Bowser Koopa!
Bowser is startled again and falls off his bed.
Bowser: Who are you?
A ghost appears. It is the ghost of a Goomba. It wears a green cloak with a red nightcap and looks like a medium-aged Goomba.
Goomba Ghost: You ask who I am, yet you should figure this out yourself, Bowser!
Bowser: Listen, Goomba ghost! It was one in the morning after I went to bed last time, and it’s one in the morning now! Why is that?
Goomba Ghost (let’s call him GG): I cannot tell! I will say one thing! You went to bed at midnight before! Anyway, enough said! I am the Ghost of Christmas Present. I watch over the Christmas of today and only today!
Bowser: That’s interesting! Are you going to show me events like the previous ghosts?
Goomba: I will show the Christmas world of the ones closest to you and the Christmas of your enemies! We shall warp there!
Bowser again feels dizzy and ends up in Lemmy’s room of the castle. Bowser sees Lemmy signing business deals while Iggy and Wendy are tending to Morton on the bed.
Morton: Stop it! It hurts! Why couldn’t you take me to the medical wing?
Wendy: Other minions were hurt worse than you! The medical wing is full right now!
Iggy: Sit still! We’re still trying to remove the glass!
Lemmy has a nervous look on his face
Lemmy: Ship the crates out to Pipe Land and Desert Land, deliver the cargo by airship, and have them pay a shipping fee!
Wendy: Lemmy! Put your operations away and help us stitch the cut below Morton’s eye.
Lemmy: Sis, if I don’t get my business done Dad will yell at me and punish me!
Wendy: I don’t care what our grouchy Dad says.
Bowser: I’ll teach you grouchy!
Bowser runs at Wendy and throws a punch, but his fist goes through her.
GG: She cannot see, hear, or feel you, Bowser. Nor can anyone else in these events!
Bowser: Well that’s stupid because she insulted me!
Iggy: Wendy, knowing you and based on how Dad acted tonight I expected a bigger insult.
Wendy: You want a bigger insult? I’ll say one if Lemmy doesn’t get over here!
Lemmy has an annoyed look on his face.
Lemmy: All right! I’ll help!
Morton starts crying.
Iggy: I haven’t done anything painful to you!
Lemmy: What’s the matter?
Iggy: He has some glass in his eye.
Wendy: Remember when Dad threw an ornament at him?
Lemmy: Yes I do!
GG: You could have blinded him! You are lucky it only reduced his sight! He will certainly have to wear a monocle or a contact!
Bowser: It’s better than blindness!
GG: The way you treat him today! If it continues the child will die!
Lemmy: Let me get Ludwig! He’ll know what to do.
Lemmy leaves the room for a moment.
Morton: Isn’t Santa coming soon?
Iggy: Dad says Santa isn’t real. I don’t know how he gets through some chimneys anyway, they can be very small.
Morton: It’s called Christmas magic!
Lemmy returns with Ludwig. Ludwig has a kit that doctors use to remove body parts. He dons a mask and puts on some gloves.
Ludwig: Move back, you three! I need space to work!
Ludwig gets some tongs and reaches towards Morton’s right eye. All Bowser can hear is screaming. Ludwig removes the glass.
Ludwig: Take him to the medical wing! They have one bed that just opened! This is out of my hands!
GG: It’s time to move on!
Bowser is spun around until he sees Mushroom wallpaper around him. Bowser immediately recognizes Peach’s castle. He sees Princess Peach, Mario, Luigi, Yoshi, Toadsworth and many toads sitting at a table. They are eating a Christmas dinner
Mario: Great lasagna, Princess! My compliments to the chef!
Peach: I’ll tell him later! Now let’s share stories of today’s events!
Mario: Well I put a bag of gold coins in a Salvation Army bucket outside Wal-Mart today. I feel bad for the Toads with no homes out there. It is cold this time of year!
Peach: That is thoughtful, Mario! I am planning to have homeless shelters built!
Luigi then goes on about how he accidentally bought the wrong game for Mario’s Wii, while Toadsworth talks about his day at the castle.
Peach: Yoshi! You haven’t told your story today yet, have you?
Yoshi: I saw somebody at Best Buy buying games a few hours ago.
Luigi: Who was it, huh? Bowser maybe!
Yoshi: It was Bowser’s child Larry, with a Hammer Bro! They were talking about how much Bowser hates Christmas. I overheard their conversation about how Bowser burned their tree. I also heard somebody got seriously hurt in the eye! Plus the Hammer Bro said he earns a measly 15 coins a week.
Bowser: Can we leave now? I don’t want to hear how this ends!
GG: I’m afraid you must hear the rest!
Bowser frowns.
Yoshi: I thought Bowser was a jerk before, but after I heard that I was astonished! I didn’t think anyone, even Bowser, would hate such a thing!
Peach: That’s just terrible! I will never let him have dinner with us here! If that’s how he wants Christmas to be then he can live like the cruel Koopa he is! I don’t want to hear the name Bowser at this table again tonight!
Bowser: Good riddance to you, Princess! I can understand you, those two dum dum plumbers, and that ugly dinosaur talking bad about me! Well guess what, I do the same about you guys!
GG: Um, you know that they cannot see, hear, or feel you...
Bowser: I know that! I just felt the urge to rant about something. *snort* At least it isn’t my own family ranting about me!
GG: It is time to leave!
Bowser again feels dizzy and ends up in Lemmy’s room of the castle. Bowser sees Lemmy signing business deals while Iggy and Wendy are tending to Morton on the bed.
Morton: Stop it! It hurts! Why couldn’t you take me to the medical wing?
Wendy: Other minions were hurt worse than you! The medical wing is full right now!
Iggy: Sit still! We’re still trying to remove the glass!
Lemmy has a nervous look on his face
Lemmy: Ship the crates out to Pipe Land and Desert Land, deliver the cargo by airship, and have them pay a shipping fee!
Wendy: Lemmy! Put your operations away and help us stitch the cut below Morton’s eye.
Lemmy: Sis, if I don’t get my business done Dad will yell at me and punish me!
Wendy: I don’t care what our grouchy Dad days.
Bowser: I’ll teach you grouchy!
Bowser runs at Wendy and throws a punch, but his fist goes through her.
GG: She cannot see, hear, or feel you, Bowser. As with anyone else in these events!
Bowser: Well it’s stupid because she insulted me!
Iggy: Wendy, knowing you and by what Dad was like tonight, I expected a bigger insult.
Wendy: You want a bigger insult? I’ll say one if Lemmy doesn’t get over here.
Wendy has an angry look on her face. Her mouth starts to open again…
Lemmy: Well, Wendy, you look like you are just DIEING to say something!
Wendy: It’s just Dad is so mean like this every year! I… I hate my father!
Bowser stops making a fist and his expression turns sad.
Bowser: She… she hates me?
GG: I’m afraid so! You have treated your children disrespectfully and now they badmouth you!
Bowser starts to cry lightly.
Bowser: Am I really that mean to them?
GG: I’m afraid so! You start hating them and they hate you! It’s like that with you Koopas!
Bowser sniffs. Meanwhile, Lemmy has an annoyed look on his face.
Lemmy: All right! I’ll help!
Morton starts crying.
Iggy: I haven’t done anything painful to you!
Lemmy: What’s the matter?
Iggy: He has some glass in his eye.
Wendy: Remember when Dad threw an ornament at him?
Lemmy: Yes I do!
GG: You could have blinded him! You are lucky it only reduced his vision! He will certainly have to wear a monocle or a contact!
Bowser: It’s better than blindness!
GG: The way you treat him today! If it continues the child will die!
Lemmy: Let me get Ludwig! He’ll know what to do.
Lemmy leaves the room for a moment.
Morton: Isn’t Santa coming soon?
Iggy: Dad says Santa isn’t real. I don’t know how he gets down some chimneys anyway, they can be very small.
Morton: It’s called Christmas magic!
Lemmy returns with Ludwig. Ludwig has a kit like doctors use to remove body parts. He puts on a mask and some gloves.
Ludwig: Move back, you three! I need space to work!
Ludwig gets some tongs and reaches towards Morton’s right eye, blocking Bowser’s view as he does. All Bowser can hear is screaming. Ludwig removes the glass.
Ludwig: Take him to the medical wing! They have one bed that just opened! This is out of my hands!
Bowser gets an angry look on his face.
Bowser: You planned this, didn’t you?! You heard about how my family never rants about me! Oh, but now you take me to a scene where they DO rant about me!
GG: You must accept the truth! Your family hates you! All of them!
Bowser’s expression soon turns sad.
Bowser: All of them? I only thought Wendy!
GG: No, they hate how you treat them around Christmas! They avoid you now! You are mean to them! That is why they avoid you! Let’s leave…
Bowser is spun around until he sees his bedroom again.
Bowser: Spirit! Hear my words!
GG: No! Hear mine! I have shown you what I’ve had to show!
Bowser has a confused look on his face.
Bowser: What do you mean everything you have?
GG: I haven’t shown you everything! I don’t have everything I need!
The Goomba ghost lifts up his cloak to reveal two Microgoombas.
GG: These are two mortals that are forced to wonder with me! I do not want you to become the third! You will see the third and final spirit tomorrow night at midnight!
Bowser: But you have food! You have rich clothing! What are you missing?
GG: In life, I was rich and powerful! But not loved! I had, wealth, fortune, food - I would trade it all for a hug from somebody who loves me! Goodbye Bowser!
Bowser: Wait!
Before the Goomba Ghost leaves Bowser walks up to him.
GG: What?
Bowser: Here!
Bowser hugs him.
GG: Thank you! I wish you good fortune!
The Goomba Ghost slowly fades away. Bowser falls asleep again. Later still he wakes up, and sees the clock. It says midnight on it!
Bowser: Let’s get this over with!
Bowser gets out of bed and sits by the fireplace. The fire is warm and comfortable. Bowser smiles at the fire, yet it reminds him of what happened at the castle.
Bowser: Where is it?
The fire goes out mysteriously. Bowser has a scared look on his face. A hooded creature is floating behind him. It shrieks at Bowser, causing him to scream and hide under the covers of his bed. Bowser pops his head out to get a look at the ghost.
Bowser: (frightened) Who are you?
The ghost removes its hood to reveal a Dark Boo. Except this Dark Boo isn’t pink like others, it is black with dark crimson red eyes.
Bowser: I assume you are the next ghost!
Dark Boo: You are correct! I am the Ghost of Christmas Yet to Come! I am going to show you your future!
Bowser gives a nervous grin.
Bowser: Yes, of course! Lead on!
Bowser spins around to where all he can see is darkness. He looks around and sees the throne room of his castle. This time it has new wallpaper and different tiling. Bowser sees minions talking to Lemmy.
Lemmy: It doesn’t look good! My father is on his deathbed as we speak! I already spoke to him, and he has his will written. It will proclaim Bowser Jr. to be the next Koopa King.
Lemmy looks a lot older. Seemingly in his 40s, Lemmy now has light gray hair instead of rainbow-colored.
Koopatrol: I thought Ludwig would be king. You know, since he’s the oldest of the Koopalings.
Lemmy: Ludwig will not be happy, yet he knows that Bowser Jr. was the likely heir to the throne since he was born.
A Goomba runs into the room. He has a serious look on his face.
Lemmy: Yes, minion?
Goomba: I have news, Lord Lemmy! It is confirmed! King Bowser is dead, sir! He passed away at 7:19 this evening, sir. He was 75 years of age, sir!
Bowser Jr. walks in, and he looks just like the present day Bowser. Lemmy picks up the microphone for the castle speaker.
Lemmy: Attention all Koopa minions and Koopalings. King Bowser is dead! He passed away this evening at 7:19! Please stop what you are doing and report to the castle throne room for orders!
Lemmy puts the microphone away.
Lemmy: Koopatrols, ring the bells!
Two Koopatrols leave.
Bowser Jr: It is true then!
His voice sounds just like Bowser’s, too.
Bowser Jr: My father has passed away then!
Hammer Bro: That is true, Prince! It was just announced!
Lemmy: Hammy! He’s not prince anymore! He’s the new king!
Hammy: Sorry! I apologize! My king!
Bowser Jr: No need to apologize! I will succeed in what my father could not do!
He points to the most wanted poster. It has pictures of Mario and Luigi. They look a lot older, now appearing to be in their early 70s. Their hair and mustaches are now white. Bells begin to ring around the castle. Koopa minions flow into the throne room.
Lemmy: It is confirmed! The bells are ringing! My father is dead!
Goomba: Should we have a funeral service?
Lemmy: No! He wasn’t a very nice king! Not nice to us! Just bury him in the castle graveyard next to his father! We can save our money for something else!
Goomba: Yes, Lord Lemmy!
The Goomba summons some Koopatrols and Hammer Bros, and they walk off. The other Koopalings walk in. They all look older. Ludwig now has sky blue hair and eyeglasses and now wears a lab coat. Roy wears a tracksuit for his boxing job and he doesn’t wear his sunglasses anymore. Iggy has a tuxedo and grey hair like Lemmy. Wendy has a ponytail and a pink- and white-striped dress. Morton is not seen. Larry has brown hair and wears a monocle. He also wears gardener’s clothes.
Lemmy: Our father doesn’t need a funeral! After the way he ran off our mother Clawdia. Not after the way Morton died!
The other Koopalings agree and nod their heads slowly.
Ludwig: It’s been 25 years since Morton died!
Roy: Mom hasn’t come back since she got a divorce!
Iggy: By the way, Lemmy, how did Dad die?
Lemmy: Too much stress! He wasn’t very joyful, and he ate a lot of high cholesterol foods.
Bowser: No! I was the reason Morton died! I got a divorce from Clawdia!
Bowser starts to cry.
Lemmy: Dad belongs where he is supposed to be! The Underwhere!
Dark Boo: It is time to go!
Bowser spins around in darkness and ends up near a graveyard.
Bowser: This is the graveyard behind my house!
Dark Boo: Look!
Bowser gasps as he sees it. His own grave! It reads:
HERE LAYS
Bowser Koopa Sr.
Born October 31, 1980
Died December 25, 2055
The biggest jerk for a king,
He was a hateful king and not liked
at all
He is now where he deserves to be
Good riddance
Bowser: NO! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
Bowser runs to his grave and sobs. Bowser sobs for hours at his grave until he gets up.
Bowser: I’ll be good now, I promise! I’ll cherish Christmas with all my heart!
Dark Boo: That’s better!
The grave splits open and Bowser falls in and lands on his own dead body. Bowser screams at the sight of himself.
Bowser: Please stop!
Bowser closes his eyes and feels the spinning force again until he ends up back by his bedside.
Bowser: I will celebrate Christmas and keep the spirit alive all year!
Dark Boo: I trust you, yet you must never despise Christmas again!
Bowser: Yes! I love Christmas!
The Dark Boo fades away.
Bowser: Christmas!
Bowser gets in his bed and falls asleep again. Eventually he wakes. Light is outside his window.
Bowser: Better get up!
Bowser gets up and unlocks his door. He walks out to see a Koopa Troopa walking by.
Bowser: What day is it today?
Koopa Troopa: Uh… King Bowser! Today is the 25th of December. Christmas Day!
Bowser: Christmas Day! Thank you! Take this and tell the others in the castle we are going to have a great feast!
Bowser hands the Koopa Troopa 5 gold coins.
Koopa Troopa: Thank you, King! And I will do that right away!
Bowser walks into the throne room and sees a Koopatrol.
Bowser: Merry Christmas!
Koopatrol: Uh… Merry Christmas to you, King Bowser!
Bowser grabs the castle microphone and makes an announcement.
Bowser: Attention all Koopa minions! Today is Christmas! Take a day off and celebrate the Holidays! Merry Christmas!
Bowser puts the microphone away. The Koopalings walk in.
Iggy: Dad? You’re giving us the day off?
Wendy: We never get the day off, do we? Except for yearly vacations!
Bowser: Well today is Christmas! And I’m here to celebrate it with you! Now let’s go get our presents!
Bowser Jr: But you burned down the Christmas tree!
Bowser: I can fix it!
The Koopalings cheer and run to the great hall. Clawdia walks in.
Clawdia: Bowser? You’re celebrating Christmas!
Bowser grabs Clawdia’s hand
Bowser: I’m sorry about last night! I was so selfish that I forgot what Christmas is all about: gift giving and DAD’S birth!
Clawdia: Oh Bowser!
Clawdia hugs Bowser.
Bowser Jr: Dad?
Bowser: What is it, Son?
Bowser Jr. pushes a wheelchair out door. On it is Morton, whom Bowser hugs.
Bowser: Morton!
Morton: Dad!
Bowser: Listen, I’m sorry for everything! I will fix that eye! I already called the castle eye doctor! So you are good to go!
Morton: Thank you, Dad! That’s nice of you!
Bowser hugs Morton again.
Bowser: Come on, let’s go open presents!
Later, after the Christmas tree is finished…
Bowser: What do you want to do first? Eat or open presents!
Koopalings: OPEN PRESENTS!
Bowser: All right!
The Koopalings open presents, which include items like new wands, Wii games like Donkey Kong Country Returns, Kirby’s Epic Yarm, and Super Mario Galaxy 2, new legos, NFL jerseys, new TV’s for their rooms, and much more.
Bowser (to himself): I may have changed my views of Christmas, but my overall goals remain the same.
Watching Bowser, Clawdia, and the Koopalings are the three spirits.
Goomba Ghost: You know he’s still going to kidnap the princess, right guys?
Koopa Troopa Ghost: As long as he cherishes Christmas with all his heart, he’ll be fine. Besides, we couldn’t control that anyway!
Dark Boo: He’s lucky he didn’t meet our fate!
Goomba Ghost: Hey, I’m bored. Want to watch those holiday shows on TV?
Koopa Troopa Ghost: I’m in for that!
Dark Boo: I’m in!
The three float away and disappear. The Koopalings, Bowser, and Clawdia start singing We Wish You a Merry Christmas.
Narrator: And that’s how one who hated Christmas came to love it! How one can learn from mistakes and do the right thing! That is the story of Bowser’s Christmas Redemption! Merry Christmas!
The End
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