The Amazing Race MK III

By Giga Bowser NS

Episode 3
Title: They must’ve thought I was talking in Klingon…

Phil: Previously on… The Amazing Race MK:

Phil: Ten teams set off from the insides of Bowser’s Body and boarded a magnificent Airship. They were faced with hardships as they completed their tasks high in the sky. Teams who chose to carry cannonballs soon found that they had chosen the wrong task.

Twila: We…definitely chose the wrong task…

Phil: As they approached the Roadblock, they discovered that they would get a once in a lifetime opportunity to fly the grand ship.

Chanterelle: Ahhh! This is nice!

Toadofsky: This is a real pleasant trip!

Phil: When faced with this obstacle, some teams crumbled under the pressure.

Rocky: I’m sorry, but you’ll have to try again.

Phil: And arguments sparked.

Birdo: I thought it was safe, but apparently it wasn’t!

Mouser: It’s common sense!

Birdo: SHUT UP!!!

Phil: In the end, Brighton & Twila had fallen behind and couldn’t recover. They were eliminated. Now…nine teams remain. Who will be eliminated…next?

The opening plays with a Red “X” over Brighton & Twila.

Phil: This is the Mushroom Kingdom Airport! Built in 1992, this Airport is situated on a secluded island in the middle of the ocean, and serves as a central junction for all of the Mushroom Kingdom’s flights! It was also the second Pit Stop in a race around the MK. Teams arrived here for a mandatory rest period that allows them to eat, sleep, and mingle with the other teams. The nine teams waiting here have no idea what’s in store for them. They have to figure out for themselves how to get to the next yellow and red route marker by solving clues they will find in sealed envelopes. Hammer Bro. & Boomerang Bro., who arrived first…will depart…at 8:43 PM.


Hammer: Fly to the Beanbean Kingdom! Wow!

Phil: Teams must now fly more than 1,500 miles to the neighboring Beanbean Kingdom. When they land, they will hire a taxi and make their way to Beanbean Castle, where they will receive their next clue from Queen Bean.

Hammer: All right, let’s get started then!

***Hammer: With two first place finishes under our shells, we feel we might have a target on our backs…

***Boomerang: But, you know, it’s nothing too big. We’re the strongest ones here and we can succeed. At anything! Anything!

Hammer: I suppose we should start asking about flights.

Boomerang: We should check Beanbean Air…

Hammer: Hi, do you have a flight to Beanbean Airport today?

Goombob: Yes, we have one departing at 9:30.

Hammer: And is that your quickest flight?

Goombob: It’s the quickest flight to the Beanbean Kingdom.

Hammer: Okay, good.

Boomerang: If we were to miss it…what’s the next option?

Goombob: We have a flight at 11:00 to the Beanbean Kingdom. No other airline flies directly there.

Hammer: Cool.

Boomerang: Some of the teams are going to catch up, but from the looks of it, not many will.

*Tickets print*

Hammer: Thank you!

Broque Monsieur/Broque Madame -- Separated Couple, 8:54 PM

Monsieur: Le Royaume de Beanbean? (The Beanbean Kingdom?)

Madame: Ah, we ‘ad better get going!

***Monsieur: Eef we were to go to a place where zey speak zee Français, zen we would ‘ave an advantage!

***Madame: Unfortunately, not many places do.

Monsieur: Zere are zee Bros.

Madame: Get behind zem in line.

Hammer Bro./Boomerang Bro. -- Partners
Hammer: Thanks for everything, bye bye!

They walk away.

Hammer: With any luck, they’ll be the only ones with us. Raz and what’s her face might make it if they rush…

Broque Monsieur/Broque Madame -- Separated Couple
Monsieur: Merci!

Madame: We are on zee flight!

Raz/Raini -- Newlyweds, 9:15 PM
Raz: Awesome! Totally awesome!

Raini: C’mon, we’d better hurry and get seats!

Hammer Bro, Boomerang Bro, Broque Monsieur and Broque Madame are boarding the plane.

Raz: Hi! What’s your quickest flight to Beanbean?

Goombob: Our 9:30 flight is about to leave.

Raz: We need tickets!

Raini: Please, sir, please! We HAVE to get on that flight!

Goombob: You might not make it.

Raz: We don’t care, we’ll run!

The plane’s engines are powering up as tickets get printed.

Raz: Oh boy, this is cutting it close.

Raini: Stop talking and run!

The other two teams are looking smugly at one another.

Raz: My little legs can’t run this fast!

Raini: The gates are gonna close any second!

Hammer Bro./Boomerang Bro. -- Partners
Hammer: They’re not here.

Boomerang: Of course. RIGHT when you say that.

Raz/Raini -- Newlyweds
They step on the plane.

Raz: Hi!

Hammer: Hi…

Raz: Well! What’re we waiting for? Let’s go!

First Flight - Hammer Bro./Boomerang Bro., Broque Monsieur/Broque Madame, Raz/Raini

Big Boo/Big Blue Boo -- Ghosts, 9:25 PM
Big Boo: Oooh, boy! Da Beanbean Kingdom!

Blue Boo: Let’s hurry and get a flight!

***Big Boo: Our strategy is to simply focus on the task at hand and get it done.

***Blue Boo: We’re probably not going to be too concerned with the other teams or what they’re doing.

At the Beanbean Air Desk…

Blue Boo: You have absolutely nothing until 11:00?!

Beanie: That is correct.

Big Boo: Dang! Everyone’s gonna catch up!

Chanterelle/Toadofsky -- Singer/Composer, 9:33 PM
Chanterelle: Ooh! This should be fun!

Toadofsky: I’ve never been there! It sounds like a weird place.

***Chanterelle: We’re flowing with the race. We’re not trying too hard to get first place yet, because there’s too many people. We’re just letting the race take us with it.

Toadofsky: Two tickets please!

Flurrie/Doopliss -- Actress/Actor, 9:40 PM
Flurrie: Let’s get going, Doop!

Doopliss: Don’t call me that. It makes me sound like an idiot!

Flurrie: Right… ”Like”…

***Flurrie: If we ever get into a jam, then it’ll be a simple task of getting some locals to help us out! I mean, when you’re as stunningly gorgeous as me, people simply BEG to help you out!

***Doopliss: She needs a reality check.

Flurrie: That’s quite a long wait, isn’t it?

Kroop/Dour -- Mayors, 9:48 PM
Kroop: Leeeeeeeeet’s get a move on!

Dour: Sure… whatever.

***Dour: I have no idea how we’re still in the race. Seriously, how is this possible?

***Kroop: It’s the power of seniors!

***Dour: More like senility!

Kroop: Where’s the Fast Forward at?

Dour: Ugh…

Bombette/Bruce -- Newly Dating, 9:55 PM
Bombette: Well, let’s get a move on!

Bruce: This is gonna be fun! Such an exotic location!

***Bombette: We’re having fun! I think that’s the most important thing on this race! It’s to have fun!

***Bruce: Yeah! We’re havin’ all sorts of fun!

Bombette: 11 PM?! We’re gonna be so far behind the others!

Bruce: Yeah. And now we’re basically tied for last place.

Birdo/Mouser -- Partners/Best Friends, 10:03 PM
Birdo: Ooooh! I went there once!

Mouser: When?

Birdo: The same time Mario went there! I met this GORGEOUS man named Popple!

Mouser: Reeeeally?

Birdo: He was so dreamy!

Mouser: ……….

***Mouser: We’re leaving in last place.

***Birdo: But that’s no problem! We’re gonna get on a flight and then we’ll catch up to everyone!

*Tickets print*

Mouser: All right!

Birdo: Well…this is it! Let’s get going!

*Shots of all the teams waiting to get on the plane*

*…except for one…*

Kroop/Dour -- Mayors
Dour: All right, we’re in big trouble…

***Dour: We were just about to buy our tickets when we noticed something.

Dour: ……..No…I don’t have it.

***Dour: Someone had lost our race credit card that we’re supposed to use to buy airline tickets.

Kroop: I swear! I didn’t touch it!

***Dour: So we had to go back to our lodgings where we spent the night. I finally found the dang thing after, like, an hour of searching.

Dour: You idiot! It’s right here!

Kroop: But…

***Dour: But by the time we got back…

Beanie: I’m sorry, but there are no seats left!

***Dour: …it was too late…

*Fade to a plane taking off*
Second Flight - Big Boo/Big Blue Boo, Chanterelle/Toadofsky, Flurrie/Doopliss, Bombette/Bruce, Birdo/Mouser

*World Map with the Amazing Yellow Line*
Phil: Teams are currently making their way to the Beanbean Kingdom…

*Shots of the landscapes, views of Hoohoo Mountain and the sea*

*Plane Lands*

First Flight
Raz/Raini -- Newlyweds
Raz: C’mon! Let’s go!

Raini: Where is it?

Broque Monsieur/Broque Madame -- Separated Couple
Monsieur: Follow me! Eet ees over ‘ere!

Madame: Okay!

Raz/Raini -- Newlyweds
Raz: Excuse me! Where can we exchange money?

***Raz: We did some research while on the plane. We knew that most people in the Beanbean Kingdom don’t accept Mushroom Coins. We needed to exchange them

Raz: There it is! The Broques are there!

Raini: Get in line!

Hammer Bro./Boomerang Bro. -- Partners
Hammer: C’mon! Follow me!

Boomerang: Get a taxi!

Hammer: Taxi! Taxi!

Boomerang: There’s one! Hi! Will you take us to Castle Town?

Troopea: Sure! Hop in!

Boomerang: Do you take Mushroom Coins?

Troopea: Yeah! Of course!

They get in and drive off.

Raz/Raini -- Newlyweds
Raz: Okay! Let’s get going!

Raini: The Broques already have a taxi!

Broque Monsieur/Broque Madame -- Separated Couple
Monsieur: To zee castle!

Madame: And ‘urry!!!

Raz/Raini -- Newlyweds
Raz: Hurry, get in!!!

*Fast forward*

Raz: We’re the only three here…

Raini: Yeah, and now we have to get to this castle…

Raz: We’re in third place.

Hammer Bro./Boomerang Bro. -- Partners
Hammer: We’re here!

Boomerang: Nice town!

Hammer: Okay! Thank you! Here you go!

Hammer pays and the taxi drives off.

Hammer: Okay, now to the castle!

Boomerang: It’s up these steps!

Broque Monsieur/Broque Madame -- Separated Couple
Monsieur: We are ‘ere!

Madame: Ah! Zee Bros! Follow zem!

Monsieur: Come on!

Hammer Bro./Boomerang Bro. -- Partners
Hammer: Let’s hurry!

They enter the castle.

Hammer: Is that the queen?

Boomerang: Where? Behind that wall?

Hammer: … That’s not a wall… That’s the queen…


Hammer: Thank you!

Broque Monsieur/Broque Madame -- Separated Couple
Madame: Wait for us!

Monsieur: Oui! What a beautiful… um… crown…

Queen: Here’re your clues!

*Riiiiiiiip* *Riiiiiiiiiiiiiip*

Hammer: Roadblock…

Phil: A Roadblock is a task that only one person may perform, and no one can do more than six on the race. In this Roadblock, teams will experience the beautiful countryside of the Beanbean Kingdom. While their partner waits for them here at the castle, the chosen team member must complete a relay using Beanbean taxis. First, they will pick up a special designer shirt from this place: Harhall’s Studio. Then, they must travel to the Yoshi Theater and deliver the shirt. In exchange, they will receive their next clue.

Hammer: Who’s got money to spare?

Boomerang: Ummm…

Hammer: I’ll do it.

Boomerang: A’ight!

Broque Monsieur/Broque Madame -- Separated Couple
Madame: Eet ees time for me to do one!

Monsieur: Good luck!

Raz/Raini -- Newlyweds
Raz: Let’s hurry!

Raini: They’re beating us! Come on! Get out of the car!


Raz: Roadblock…

Raini: Ummm… Me!

Raz: Okay, good luck!

Hammer Bro./Boomerang Bro. -- Partners
Hammer: Okay, let’s read this and make sure we do it right… Okay, it says we can’t use the taxi we used to get here. We must hire one from Castle Town.

Broque Monsieur/Broque Madame -- Separated Couple
Madame: Taxi! Taxi!

Hammer Bro./Boomerang Bro. -- Partners

Hammer: Now to find another one…

Raz/Raini -- Newlyweds
Raini: Thank you! *oays* Oy… Where are the taxis?!

*Camera shift*
Broque Monsieur/Broque Madame -- Separated Couple
Madame: Okay! We need to find zis place. ‘ar’all’s studio!

Cabbie: Um, s’cuse me?

Madame: *shows the clue* ‘ar’all’s studio!

Cabbie: Oh, Harhall. Why didn’t you say so?!

Madame: …


Hammer Bro./Boomerang Bro. -- Partners
Hammer: Taxi! Taxii!!!!

Cabbie: No.

Hammer: Aww, he’s taken! Come on!

Raz/Raini -- Newlyweds
Raini: Are you a taxi?

Cabbie: Hop in!

Raini: We need to go to Harhall’s Studio!

Cabbie: Right away!

Hammer Bro./Boomerang Bro. -- Partners
Hammer: Aww, man! They both got one! TAXI!!!

Boomerang: What are you doing, man?!

Hammer: Looking for a taxi!

Boomerang: Right there!

Hammer: Oh… Hi! To Harhall’s Studio, please!!!

Cabbie: Certainly!

Hammer: How much will that cost?

Cabbie: Uhhhh…. Should be… about 70 coins.

Hammer: How much in Mushroom Coins?

Cabbie: Mushroom Coins?! We don’t accept Mushroom Coins here! In case you haven’t noticed, we’re in the Beanbean Kingdom, mister!

Hammer: Wh…what do you mean? The taxi I took earlier accepted Mushroom Coins!

Cabbie: Well, he shouldn’t’ve!

Hammer: But…

Cabbie: Look, bud. Here in the Beanbean Kingdom, we ONLY accept Beanbean Coins, so… go get some!

Hammer: This... Oh, my gosh….

***Hammer: I got this feeling of dread… deep in my stomach. This was a HUGE mistake.

Boomerang (distant) What’s the problem?!

***Hammer: The only thing I could do was go back to my partner so we could figure out what to do…

Hammer: He says he won’t take Mushroom Coins!

Boomerang: What?! Why not?!

Hammer: You can’t use Mushroom Coins here!

Boomerang: But that other taxi…

Hammer: He was just being nice, I guess…He wasn’t supposed to.

Both: …

Boomerang: What do we do?

Hammer: We have to get back to the airport! We have to change our money!

Boomerang: Couldn’t we go to a bank or ask someone?

Hammer: The cabbie told me that banks don’t exchange money. The only places are the airport and Stardust Fields, which is too far away.

Boomerang: Well, I have to wait here. You’re doing a Roadblock. Just… get going! The other flight isn’t here yet, so hopefully we won’t fall too far behind!

Hammer: All right…

He returns to the taxi.

Hammer: All right, dude, can you take me to the Airport? When we get there, I’ll exchange money and pay you.

Cabbie: Eeeeeeeeeeehhhh… All right. Hop in.

Hammer: Thank you so much!

***Hammer: So I just had to go… pick up the pieces and go…

Broque Monsieur/Broque Madame -- Separated Couple
Madame: Ees zis zee right way?

Cabbie: Just a few more minutes.

Madame: Zis ees zee way back to zee airport, no?

Cabbie: Harhall’s studio is right next to the Airport… kinda…

Madame: …

Raz/Raini -- Newlyweds
Raini: All right! We’re flyin’! Is that Broque Madame up there? Ooh! C’mon! Try to pass!

Broque Monsieur/Broque Madame -- Separated Couple
Madame: Trés bien! (Very good!) You are doing very well!

Raz/Raini -- Newlyweds
Raini: Aw, man! Come on! Can you go faster?

Hammer Bro./Boomerang Bro. -- Partners
Hammer: …

***Hammer: I had actually read in some guidebook about them only taking Beanbean coins, but when that first taxi accepted Mushroom coins I kinda forgot about it.

Hammer: Uugghh…

***Hammer: I mean, I had to go to the airport, spend forever changing all of our money, and then I had to go back to Castle Town to start the Roadblock again.

Hammer: Just go quickly, please. I’m losin’ time here!

Two taxis pull up.

Broque Monsieur/Broque Madame -- Separated Couple
Madame: D’accord! Can you wait, please? I am picking somezing up!

Cabbie: Okay!

Madame: ‘ar’all! I am ‘ere!

Raz/Raini -- Newlyweds
Raini: Wait for me! Haha!!!

Madame: ‘ar’all? Where ees ‘e?

Raini: I don’t know… Over here?

Madame: There ‘e ees!

Raini: Harhall! We’re here to pick up a designer shirt!

Harhall: Oh, FINALLY! Here you are. Here’s one for you too… Be CAREFUL! Those are delicate!

Broque Monsieur/Broque Madame -- Separated Couple
Madame: D’accord! Merci! (Okay! Thank you!)

She hops back in the taxi.

Madame: Okay! To zee Yoshi Theater, s'il vous plaît!

Cabbie: That’s pretty far. You have the money?

Madame: I’m pretty sure!


Raz/Raini -- Newlyweds
Raini: How does she fit in that taxi…?


Hammer Bro./Boomerang Bro. -- Partners
Hammer: …

Cabbie: Here is the Airport.

Hammer: Thank you VERY much! I’ll be right back!

***Hammer: There was a long line too. I probably spent almost 20 minutes in there

Hammer: Ugghh… Thank you!

***Hammer: And FINALLY, I was back on track.

Hammer: Okay! To Castle Town!


Raz/Raini -- Newlyweds
Raini: *looks at watch* Hmm… The other flight should be here soon.

Second Flight
Bombette/Bruce -- Newly Dating
Bruce: Well, we just landed in the Beanbean Kingdom… We’re off the airplane first…

Bombette: We gotta get through customs, and then we have to change our money.

Bruce: So we’ll be held up here for a while, but hopefully not too long…

Flurrie/Doopliss -- Actress/Actor
Doopliss: Uggghhh… These people have no idea what they’re doing.

Flurrie: This is taking far too long!

Chanterelle/Toadofsky -- Singer/Composer
Toadofsky: C’mon! Move!

Broque Monsieur/Broque Madame -- Separated Couple
Madame: Ees zis zee right way?

Cabbie: I am not quite sure… I know it is up here in the north…

Raz/Raini -- Newlyweds
Raini: Woo-hoo! Let’s go, man!

***Raini: And just like that, we were in first!

Raini: C’mon!

***Raini: Pretty awesome!

Broque Monsieur/Broque Madame -- Separated Couple
Raini (distant) Wooooo!!!

Madame: Ahh! Follow zat taxi!

***Madame: I decided to follow Raini’s taxi. Eef she was going zee right way, zen I would be too. Eef she was going zee wrong way, zen we’d both be zere and neizer of us would ‘ave an advantage.

Madame: Just follow zat one! Don’t lose eet!

Bombette/Bruce -- Newly Dating
Bombette: All right! Taxi!

***Bombette: First out from the second flight.

Bombette: We’re in fourth, man! This is pretty good!

Bruce: Just go!

Big Boo/Big Blue Boo -- Ghosts
Big Boo: Taxi!

Blue Boo: All right, all right, all right! We’re going to Castle Town!

Big Boo: I just hope he knows the way… We don’t want to fall any further behind…

Hammer Bro./Boomerang Bro. -- Partners
Hammer: Okay, I’m back… Now let’s start again.

He drives off in a different taxi as the camera shifts to Boomerang Bro.

Boomerang: *sigh*

***Boomerang: D’you know how hard it was to just sit there and watch him screw up? There was nothing I could do… It was agonizing…

*Fast Forward*
Broque Monsieur/Broque Madame -- Separated Couple
Madame: Zis ees not zee right place…

Raz/Raini -- Newlyweds
Raini: I thought you knew where the Yoshi Theater was!

Cabbie: I thought it was here…

Raini: Well, it’s not. This is Hoohoo Mountain…

Cabbie: Hold on, let me call my dispatcher…

Raini: *mumbles*

Broque Monsieur/Broque Madame -- Separated Couple
Madame: ‘old on, sir. Let me get my map. Zis ees ‘oo’oo Mountain, so we must go… zat way!

Cabbie: You got it!

They drive off.

Raz/Raini -- Newlyweds
Raini: Hmmmm…

Bombette/Bruce -- Newly Dating
Bruce: Roadblock…

Bombette: I’ll do it.

Bruce: You sure?

Bombette: Positive! You just wait right here!

Big Boo/Big Blue Boo -- Ghosts
Blue Boo: Me.

Big Boo: Okay! Good luck!


Flurrie/Doopliss -- Actress/Actor
Flurrie: You want to do it?

Doopliss: Sure, I guess…

Flurrie: Good luck!

Hammer Bro./Boomerang Bro. -- Partners
Hammer: Ooohkay… Here’s Harhall’s Studio. Where’s this person?

Harhall: HURRY UP! Take the shirt already! Don’t damage it!

Hammer: Woah… What’s eating you?

Harhall: I am an ARTIST! I’m supposed to be like this!

Hammer: … Right…

Chanterelle/Toadofsky -- Singer/Composer
Chanterelle: Hmmmm…

Toadofsky: I think you should do this one.

Chanterelle: Okay…

***Toadofsky: I let Chanty do this Roadblock because it seemed to require a lot of brains.

Chanterelle: Wish me luuuuuck!

Hammer Bro./Boomerang Bro. -- Partners

Boomerang: …

Boomerang: Now they’re all catching up…

Broque Monsieur/Broque Madame -- Separated Couple
Madame: Okay! Zis must be zee place! I am positive!

Cabbie: Yep! Yoshi Theater!

*Shots of the colorful theater*

Madame: Wow! Trés Beau! (Very beautiful!)

Boddle: Do you have my designer shirt?

Madame: Right ‘ere!

Boddle: Thank you very much! Here is your next clue!


Madame: Return to your partner…

Phil: Teams must now return to their partner at Castle Town, then hire yet another different taxi to take them to this place: Teehee Desert. This desolate wasteland is where teams will find their next clue.

Madame: I ‘ave to find my ‘usband! I am coming, my sweet!

***Madame: Before zis race, we were separated and did not speak to each ozer. ‘owever, I am starting to remember why I married ‘im!

Madame: Allez! (Go!)

Raz/Raini -- Newlyweds
Raini: All right! This is the place! And I’m right behind her!


Raini: Return to your partner… Okay! Sounds good!

Birdo/Mouser -- Partners/Best Friends
Mouser: Ugh… Roadblock.

Birdo: It’s your turn to do some.

Mouser: Fine…

***Mouser: We… haven’t really been getting along as well as we should be.

Mouser: Wish me luck, man!


***Mouser: Maybe I should stop with the man jokes…

Hammer Bro./Boomerang Bro. -- Partners
Hammer: Ugh, can you go a little faster?

Cabbie: …

Hammer: If the other teams pass me, I won’t be happy…

Cabbie: Mmmhmm…

Hammer: …

Bombette/Bruce -- Newly Dating
Bombette: Okay… I’m on my way to… Harhall’s Studio… I’m in a taxi… and I’m going to pick up a… designer shirt…

Big Boo/Big Blue Boo -- Ghosts
Blue Boo: Hm? Who’s that? It’s little Bombette! Pass her! Pass her, please!

Bombette/Bruce -- Newly Dating
Bombette: Aww, man! Who’s that?

Big Boo/Big Blue Boo -- Ghosts
Blue Boo: Eeeheheheheehhh! Very good!

Flurrie/Doopliss -- Actress/Actor
Doopliss: Yeaaaahhh! Keep going! You’re passing them!

***Doopliss: My taxi driver rocked! He drove real fast and passed both Bombette…

Bombette/Bruce -- Newly Dating
Bombette: No, man! Everyone’s passing you!

Flurrie/Doopliss -- Actress/Actor
***Doopliss: …and Blue!

Big Boo/Big Blue Boo -- Ghosts
Blue Boo: Rrr… Someone’s passing…

***Blue Boo: It was pretty wild as we tried to pass.

Three team members scramble out and jostle each other as they run to Harhall.

All: *Talking at once*

Harhall: Oh, enough! ENOUGH! I can’t concentrate on my GENIUS with you blabbering! Here! Hurry up and take these designer shirts already! GET OUT OF MY FACE!

Big Boo/Big Blue Boo -- Ghosts
Blue Boo: Thank you and goodbye!

Bombette/Bruce -- Newly Dating
Bombette: See ya!

Flurrie/Doopliss -- Actress/Actor
Doopliss: Okay! Go!

Harhall: … Idiots…

*The image fades to a shot of the sea*
Kroop/Dour -- Mayors
Kroop: Yup…

Dour: Well… we’re still sitting here… We’re kinda stuck here for a while. The next flight isn’t until… well, a long time…

Kroop: We’re gonna win!

Dour: *sigh*

Broque Monsieur/Broque Madame -- Separated Couple
Monsieur: Ah! You ‘ave returned!

Madame: We must ‘urry! Come on!

Raz/Raini -- Newlyweds
Raini: Raz! Get us another taxi!

Raz: Taxi! We need a taxi!

Broque Monsieur/Broque Madame -- Separated Couple
They get in a new cab.

Madame: We must go to Tee’ee Desert!

Monsieur: To zee Desert? Oh mon dieu (Oh my gosh, eet ees gonna be ‘ot!

Bombette/Bruce -- Newly Dating
Bombette: Oh, man! We are flying! You know the way, right?

Cabbie: Yes, I know it!

Bombette: Good! Good! Hopefully we can catch up to some of the first flight teams!

Big Boo/Big Blue Boo -- Ghosts
Blue Boo: Just stay behind that cab in front of you.

***Blue Boo: It was me, Bombette, and, uh, Doop… We are all in a line. And we were going pretty fast…

Bombette/Bruce -- Newly Dating
Bombette: It’s another taxi! Who is it?

***Bombette: Suddenly we started approaching another taxi in front of us…

Hammer Bro./Boomerang Bro. -- Partners
Hammer: Can’t you go faster?

Cabbie: I won’t break the law.

Hammer: …

Bombette/Bruce -- Newly Dating
Bombette: Can you pass him? Try to pass him!

Hammer Bro./Boomerang Bro. -- Partners
Hammer: The theater is 5 minutes away? Okay…

Hammer: Someone’s behind me! Oh, gosh!

Bombette/Bruce -- Newly Dating
Bombette: It’s… it’s Hammer Bro! Oh my gosh!

***Bombette: Out of the three teams on the first flight, I really didn’t expect to catch up to THEM!

Hammer Bro./Boomerang Bro. -- Partners
Hammer: It’s people from the second flight… Uuuugggghhhh…

***Hammer: It wasn’t a good sign…

Chanterelle/Toadofsky -- Singer/Composer
Chanterelle: Hi! Do you have a shirt for me?

Harhall: Here you go! Please be careful!

Chanterelle: I will! Thanks! ?

Birdo/Mouser -- Partners/Best Friends
Mouser: Please hurry!

Cabbie: This is the place.

Mouser: Ugghhh..

***Mouser I was lagging, so I had to hurry…

Mouser: Just gimme the shirt. Thank you and goodbye!

*Musical Transition*
Broque Monsieur/Broque Madame -- Separated Couple
Madame: Zis ees zee entrance to zee desert!

Raz/Raini -- Newlyweds
Raz: Don’t lose them! We gotta beat them at the Detour!

Broque Monsieur/Broque Madame -- Separated Couple
Monsieur: D’accord! I see zee clue! Come! (Okay!)

Both teams scramble out and get to the clue box.

Raz: Wow…


Raz: … It’s hot!

Raini: Detour!

Phil: A Detour is a choice between two tasks, each with its own pros and cons!

*High speed shots of the desert wasteland*

Phil: In this Detour, there are only two choices: Wrap or Rappel. In Wrap, teams must learn how to properly wrap the traditional turban onto a Gritty Goomba. If the Gritty Goomba is satisfied with their work, he will tell them their next clue… in Arabic. This task is much simpler. However, writing down the verbal Arabic clue will not be easy. In Rappel, teams will find this pipe leading underground, and must rappel down it. Once at the bottom, they will find their clue in written form. While this clue is also in Arabic, it is written out clearly and getting a translation will be much easier.

Broque Monsieur/Broque Madame -- Separated Couple
Monsieur: We must rappel down zat pipe? Oh, zat ees a thin pipe!

Madame: We should do zee ozer one.

Monsieur: But… Oh, all right.

Raz/Raini -- Newlyweds
Raz: Oh, of course we’ll Rappel! That’s fine!

Raini: All right! If you say so! Let’s go!

Raz: Waahoooo!

Hammer Bro./Boomerang Bro. -- Partners
Hammer: Hi! You ordered a shirt!

Boddle: Why, yes I did! Oh my!

Other cabs show up.

Bombette/Bruce -- Newly Dating
Bombette: Here! Shirt!

Big Boo/Big Blue Boo -- Ghosts
Blue Boo: Here! Take a shirt!

Flurrie/Doopliss -- Actress/Actor
Doopliss: Shirt!!!

Boddle: Okay! Okay! Calm down!

He hands each of them a clue.

*Riiiiiiiiiip* *Riiiiiiiiip* *Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiip* *Riiiiip*

Hammer Bro./Boomerang Bro. -- Partners
Hammer: Return to your partner…

***Hammer: When I got that clue, I ran so fast back to my taxi. We had really fallen behind, and I wasn’t too happy about it.

Hammer: Castle town! Go!

Big Boo/Big Blue Boo -- Ghosts
Blue Boo: That wasn’t too hard! Okay, back to Castle Town! I need my Big Boo Partner!

Cabbie: You got it!

Bombette/Bruce -- Newly Dating
Bombette: Ack! There goes the Boo! C’mon, man! Step on it!

Cabbie: Okay!

Bombette: Don’t lose him!

Flurrie/Doopliss -- Actress/Actor
Doopliss: Castle Town!

Broque Monsieur/Broque Madame -- Separated Couple
Madame: Like zees?

Monsieur: I zink so…

***Monsieur: We got zeese directions for wrapping zee turban. Zey weren’t in Anglais (English), but zey had very descriptive pictures.

Madame: What now?

Raz/Raini -- Newlyweds
Raz: Okay! I’m off!

***Raz: The pipe was dark, but it wasn’t too tall. It was a piece of cake!

Raz: Woo! This is fun! Don’t get scared when you come down!

*Time lapse*
Hammer Bro./Boomerang Bro. -- Partners
Hammer: I’m back! Finally!!!

Boomerang: Good! Don’t worry, we’re still in third!

Big Boo/Big Blue Boo -- Ghosts
Blue Boo: Yo, Big! C’mere and get us another taxi!

Big Boo: There’s one over there!

Hammer Bro./Boomerang Bro. -- Partners
Boomerang: Hey, go away! This is our taxi!

Big Boo: What are you talking about? No it isn’t!

Boomerang: Just get another one. This is ours.

Blue Boo: *moves to the driver’s window* Will you take us to Teehee Desert?

Cabbie: Sure! Hop in!

Big Boo: See? I knew you were lying.

Blue Boo: C’mon, get in!

They drive off.

Hammer Bro./Boomerang Bro. -- Partners
Boomerang: *sigh*

Hammer: Here’s another one! Come on! Hurry up!!!

Bombette/Bruce -- Newly Dating
Bombette: There he is! Bruucee!!!

Bruce: Oh, my love has returned! You were away for far too long!

Bombette: Hey, I did my best!

Bruce: Sorry… I meant that in a romantic way… Whatever. Let’s get going!

Flurrie/Doopliss -- Actress/Actor
Flurrie: THERE you are! Come on! Hurry up!

Doopliss: I’m coming! Don’t you worry!

Chanterelle/Toadofsky -- Singer/Composer
Chanterelle: This is Yoshi Theater?

Cabbie: Ayup!

Chanterelle: Oh, my! It’s simply gorgeous! I simply MUST get my agent to book me a performance here someday!

She hands over the shirt.


Chanterelle: Return to my Partner! He’s been waiting for me! Let’s get going!

Birdo/Mouser -- Partners/Best Friends
Mouser: This is the joint!

Chanterelle: Oh! Please go fast! That’s my competition in that other cab!

Mouser: It’s da singer! Mann!

Boddle: Thank you very much!

Mouser: Yeah, yeah, whatever. *Riiiiiiip*

Broque Monsieur/Broque Madame -- Separated Couple
Monsieur: Ees eet okay?

Gritty Goomba: Mm! *nods* !??? (Good!)

Madame: Now ‘e ees going to tell us our clue in Arabique!

Gritty: ????? ??? ???????. ?????? ??? ??? ?????? ?? ??????.
Subtitles: (Travel through the desert. Find Phil near the Elevator.)

Phil: Teams must now translate their Arabic clue to find the location of the next Pit Stop. This elevator at the far end of the desert leads to Little Fungitown. The last team to check in here… may be eliminated.

Monsieur: *takes out pen and paper* Could you repitez? (Could you repeat?)

Madame: Arabique ees such an ‘ard language!

***Monsieur: We tried to write zee clue as best we could, but it was really complicated.

Raz/Raini -- Newlyweds
Raz: Come on, R’ini! It’s not too far!

Raini: I’m coming! I’m coming!

***Raini: Raz has been very supportive of me. I think I’ve become very brave, and I’m proud of myself!

Raini: Am I there yet?

Raz: You’re doing great! Keep it up!

She reaches the bottom and they run into the next room.

Raz: Here’s the clue. *Riiiiiip*

Raini: Hmm… Let’s get to the surface and show this to someone.

Raz: Yeah… I failed Arabic in school…

Hammer Bro./Boomerang Bro. -- Partners
Hammer: Uggghhh… Not a good day.

Boomerang: You’re tellin’ me? Dude, we’re gonna run out of money pretty soon.

Hammer: Really?

Boomerang: Yeah. I’m pretty sure we’ve got enough for this cab ride, but after that we’re pretty close to 0…

Hammer: Man… Doesn’t sound good.

Broque Monsieur/Broque Madame -- Separated Couple
Monsieur: Excuse Moi! Can you come ‘ere!

***Monsieur: Zen we ‘ad zees brilliant idea to get one of zee locals to come and listen to zee Arabique directions!

Monsieur: ‘ere! You say zee clue again, please?

***Monsieur: And with zat, we knew where to go.

Pokey: He’s saying to find the elevator. That’s at the end of the desert.

Raz/Raini -- Newlyweds
Raz: Look! There go the Broques!

Raini: Let’s just follow them…

Raz: We’d better hurry! Look! Other teams are here!

Bombette/Bruce -- Newly Dating
Bombette: Detour…

Bruce: Let’s… um…

Bombette: We’ll rappel.

Bruce: Are you sure? You might get hurt!

Bombette: Just come!

Hammer Bro./Boomerang Bro. -- Partners
Hammer: Detour…

Boomerang: Obviously, we’ll rappel! And getting a written clue will be much better!

Big Boo/Big Blue Boo -- Ghosts
Big Boo: Hmmm… I don’t think we can really rappel?

Blue Boo: The turban wrapping must be much easier anyway! Come on!

Flurrie/Doopliss -- Actress/Actor
Doopliss: We’re always at the back of this group!


Flurrie: Detour… I would simply love to rappel! I’ve always wanted to try that!

*Quick shots through the desert…*

Broque Monsieur/Broque Madame -- Separated Couple
Monsieur: I do not see zees elevator…

Madame: Keep going! Eet ees at zee end of zee desert!

Raz/Raini -- Newlyweds
Raz: They’re looking for some sort of elevator.

Raini: Must be the elevator to Little Fungitown!

***Raini: We had picked up a guidebook, and when I heard “elevator” and we were in the desert, I knew which way to go.

Raini: Look for signs!

Bombette/Bruce -- Newly Dating
Bruce: Are you down?

Bombette: That was kinda scary…

Bruce: You okay?

Bombette: I’m fine! Just go!

***Bruce: Having no hands… going down that rope with my wick was… it was not only difficult, but it was scary.

Bombette: C’mon Brucy!

Hammer Bro./Boomerang Bro. -- Partners
Hammer: Don’t let him pass you!

***Hammer: Apparently they built more pipes. When Mario came here there were only a few…

Hammer: C’mon, man! Let’s catch up!

Boomerang: Ughh… My rope’s all tangled!

Raz/Raini -- Newlyweds
Raz: There! Follow me!

Raini: Do you see it? Where’s Phil?

Raz: There! C’mon!

Phil: …

Raz: Woo! I think we made it!

Broque Monsieur/Broque Madame -- Separated Couple
Monsieur: Where did zey go?

Madame: Follow zem!

***Monsieur: We went a little out of zee way, so zey beat us.

Raz/Raini -- Newlyweds
Raz: There he is!!! Hahaaa!

Fungitown Toad: Hi! Welcome to The Teehee Desert in the Beanbean Kingdom!

Raz: Thanks a lot!!!

Phil: … Raz & Raini? You’re team number one!

Raz: Waaa! Yeaaaahhh! We made it!

Raini: We’re in first place! Woo!

Phil: Congratulations. As the winners for this leg of the race, you’ve each won an all-expense paid tour to all the other places in the Beanbean Kingdom!

Raz: Sounds good! And we can enjoy that after the race?

Phil: Yup!

Raz: Hahaaa!

***Raz: After three legs, we finally made it to first place. And we couldn’t be happier!

Raini: Good job, honey!

Broque Monsieur/Broque Madame -- Separated Couple
Monsieur: Zere ‘ee ees! Come on, ‘oney!

Phil: Broque Monsieur & Broque Madame? You’re team number two!

Monsieur: Trés bon! (Very good!) Good job!

Madame: We made eet, and we’re still in second! Bon travail! (Good job!)

Chanterelle/Toadofsky -- Singer/Composer
Chanterelle: Come on, ‘sky! Let’s goo!

Toadofsky: Good job! You came back fast!

Birdo/Mouser -- Partners/Best Friends
Birdo: Where the *bleep* is Mouser?!

Mouser: I’m right here! Let’s go!

Birdo: What took you so long?!



Flurrie/Doopliss -- Actress/Actor
Flurrie: Doopliss! Where are you?

Doopliss: Shaddup, I’m coming!

Flurrie: Please hurry! I think the others are done!

*Riiiiiiip* *Riiiiiip*
Hammer Bro./Boomerang Bro. -- Partners
Hammer: Okay, here’s our clue.

Boomerang: To the surface!

Bombette/Bruce -- Newly Dating
Bombette: Let’s go!

Bruce: Great job, honey!

Big Boo/Big Blue Boo -- Ghosts
Blue Boo: There! That’s good, right?

Big Boo: Not too tight?

Gritty: *nods* ????? ??? ???????. ?????? ??? ??? ?????? ?? ??????.

Blue Boo: Wait… What?

Big Boo: That went by waay too fast…

Flurrie/Doopliss -- Actress/Actor
Doopliss: Okay… I’m done now…

Flurrie: Let’s hurry! The others aren’t too far ahead!


Flurrie: Arabic clue… Got it…

Hammer Bro./Boomerang Bro. -- Partners
Hammer: C’mon, Bro!

Boomerang: Where do you think you’re going?

***Boomerang: Hammer Bro. thought that we could find the Pit Stop by just running around.

Hammer: It’s gotta be here!

Boomerang: How do you know it’s in the desert?

Bombette/Bruce -- Newly Dating
Bruce: Ask someone…

Bombette: Excuse me, can you translate this?

***Bruce: It wasn’t too long before we had directions!

Bombette: C’mon! We can run!

Hammer Bro./Boomerang Bro. -- Partners
Boomerang: Dude, you’re running blind! C’mon!!!

Hammer: Look! There go the Bombs! Let’s just follow them!

Boomerang: That’s a greeeeat idea! COME ON!!!

Big Boo/Big Blue Boo -- Ghosts
Blue Boo: We need to find… bleaaahhh alllhaaaaaa…..

***Big Boo: We sounded like a couple of idiots trying to speak the Arabic.

***Blue Boo: It wasn’t exactly easy…

Bombette/Bruce -- Newly Dating
Bruce: There he is! It’s Phil!

Bombette: The Bros. are behind us! Don’t let them pass!

Hammer Bro./Boomerang Bro. -- Partners
Hammer: C’mon dude!

Boomerang: Sorry, man… I’m worn out!

Hammer: Well, they made it…

Bombette/Bruce -- Newly Dating
Phil: Bombette & Bruce… You’re Team Number Three!

Bombette: Wooo! Good job, honey!

Bruce: Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Awesome! Yeah!

Phil: Congratulations. Let’s let the others in…

Hammer Bro./Boomerang Bro. -- Partners
Hammer: Hoo…

Phil: Hammer Bro. & Boomerang Bro?

Hammer: It’s been a long day…

Phil: You’re team number four!

Hammer: That’s…. that’s still pretty good!

Boomerang: Just one mistake is all it takes to completely ruin you. We’re luck it didn’t…

***Hammer: We were grateful to be in fourth, because we knew we had a problem.

***Boomerang: We were very low on cash….

***Hammer: But we were saved from elimination THIS time, so that’s good.

Flurrie/Doopliss -- Actress/Actor
Flurrie: Wait, Doop! We need to figure out what this says!

Doopliss: I already asked someone! C’mon!

Flurrie: What?

***Flurrie: We’re not working entirely the best that we could be. Sometimes he thinks he’s on a team of one…

Flurrie: Don’t leave me behind!

***Doopliss: Luckily, I asked this one guy and he knew the way!

Big Boo/Big Blue Boo -- Ghosts
Blue Boo: *More jarbled Arabic*

***Big Boo: Yeah, that didn’t work out so well…

***Blue Boo: They must’ve thought I was talking in Klingon…

Big Boo: Wait, wait, enough of this. Follow us. We’ll get the guy to say it again, Blue.

Blue Boo: I suppose that would work better…

Big Boo: C’mon!

Chanterelle/Toadofsky -- Singer/Composer
Chanterelle: Detour…

***Toadofsky: We decided to do the rappel… We were a little scared, but we knew it’d be quicker.

Toadofsky: It’ll be okay! C’mon!

Birdo/Mouser -- Partners/Best Friends
Birdo: *sigh* Detour…

Mouser: Let’s… let’s do the rappelling. You can handle that, right?

Birdo: Sure, fine…

Phil: Flurrie & Doopliss… You’re team number five!
Flurrie/Doopliss -- Actress/Actor
Flurrie: Oh, excellent, darling! Excellent!

Doopliss: Five’s pretty good! We still made it, and that’s the important thing!

Flurrie: Yes! We’ll move on up the pack eventually!

Chanterelle/Toadofsky -- Singer/Composer
Toadofsky: C’mon, Chanty! You can make it!

Chanterelle: I’m coming!

***Toadofsky: She came down that rappel like it was nothing!

***Chanterelle: I was pretty proud of myself!

Chanterelle: This is pretty fun!

Big Boo/Big Blue Boo -- Ghosts
Big Boo: Here! Here, say it again, please!

***Blue Boo: We ended up bringing this dude from the desert over to the Gritty Goomba

Blue Boo: Okay, you know now? Okay! Let’s go!

Birdo/Mouser -- Partners/Best Friends
Birdo: C’monnnn! Man, you’re slow!

Mouser: Shut up! I’m going as fast as I can!

Birdo: Well, it’s not fast enough, so c’mon!

Mouser: Uuuggghhhh…

Chanterelle/Toadofsky -- Singer/Composer
Chanterelle: Okay, we need someone to translate this…

Toadofsky: Got it. Let’s go!

Big Boo/Big Blue Boo -- Ghosts
Big Boo: He said this way, right?

Blue Boo: Look! I see Phil! C’mon!!!

They fly over to the mat.

Phil: … Big Boo & Big Blue Boo…? You’re team number six!

Big Boo: All riiiiiight!

Blue Boo: Excellent job!

Big Boo: That… was a tough leg… But we made it!

Birdo/Mouser -- Partners/Best Friends
Mouser: Okay, we got the clue, now what?

***Birdo: We had gotten the clue and returned to the surface. When we got up there, Chanty and Toady were already running away. We figured that the best thing to do would probably be to follow them.

Chanterelle/Toadofsky -- Singer/Composer
Chanterelle: This is the way! C’mon, ‘sky!

Toadofsky: That dude sounded pretty sure of himself! This must be the right way!

Birdo/Mouser -- Partners/Best Friends
Mouser: Don’t lose them!

Birdo: I won’t, if you HURRY UP!

Chanterelle/Toadofsky -- Singer/Composer
Chanterelle: They’re following us! I can’t believe it!

Toadofsky: Well, c’mon! We’ll still beat them!

Birdo & Mouser catch up and they both step on the mat at almost the same time.

All 4: *panting*

Phil: …

All 4: …

Phil: Chanterelle & Toadofsky… you’re team number seven!

Chanterelle/Toadofsky -- Singer/Composer
Chanterelle: All right! Very well done!

Toadofsky: Thanks a lot, Phil!

Phil: Birdo & Mouser, that would make you team number eight! Congratulations.

Birdo: Ugghhh…

Mouser: Thanks Phil…

***Mouser: We… ended up in second to last place… Not quite sure exactly how that happened…

***Birdo: But we made it, and that’s the important thing.

Chanterelle/Toadofsky -- Singer/Composer
Both: …

***Chanterelle: We basically did all of the work and they just copied us.

***Toadofsky: We weren’t too pleased that they just followed us to the Pit Stop.

***Chanterelle: We would’ve preferred that they just figure out the Arabic clue on their own…

*Shot of the sky as the sun sets… and rises…*

A plane lands.
*Door slam*
A taxi drives off.

Kroop/Dour -- Mayors
Dour: Oh, man…

Kroop: Well! We’re here! Enjoy the sights!

***Dour: We were so far behind that even Kroop realized that we were in last place.

Kroop: We could still catch up!

Dour: Right…

Dour: Take a taxi into Teehee Desert and find the elevator leading to Little Fungitown…

Kroop: Okay! We’re off on another adventure!

*Fade to the Pit Stop*

Dour: Oh, man…

Kroop: Here we are!

Phil: … Kroop & Dour… You’re the last team to arrive.

Dour: You’re kidding, Phil.

Phil: I’m sorry to tell you, you’ve both been eliminated from the race.

Kroop: Weeeeeeell… I guess it was bound to happen eventually.

Dour: We’re… probably a little too old for this race anyhoo…

Kroop: But we had fun! We suuuuuure did!

***Dour: The race taught me many things! It taught me how to have fun, and how to enjoy life. It’s gonna feel weird returning to gloomy ol’ Twilight Town now.

***Kroop: Ayup! I felt for sure we could win, but we didn’t. We just didn’t…

***Dour: And I suppose it was kinda expected.

***Kroop: But we had fun!

***Dour: Yeah. Lots of fun!

The Credits Roll…

Read on!

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