A Terribly Pointless Story

By YoshiForever

Once upon a time, Mario was fixing a leak in the kitchen when the leak sprayed all over him.

Mario: @$#%!

Mario then tried corking the leak. In the middle of that, his provolone cheese sandwich fell onto the floor.

Mario: Bad sand-a-wich!

Mario put his sandwich back on the counter. But then it fell on the floor again.

Mario: That’s a-it!

BATTLE!
Mario:
Attack: 40
Defense: 60
HP: 80
FP: 20

Sandwich:
Attack: 150
Defense: 200
HP: 100
FP: 5

Mario: Die, sand-a-wich!
Mario Attack: Monkey Wrench
Mario: Take a-that! And a-that! And a-this-a! And a-for good measure, this-a!

Sandwich HP: 96
Sandwich Attack: Stinky Cheese
Mario: Mamamia!

Mario HP: 54
Mario Attack: Sit
Mario squishes the sandwich

Sandwich HP 89
Sandwich Attack: Super Stinky Cheese

Mario HP: 0

BATTLE OVER

Mario passed out onto the floor. When he woke up…

BATTLE!
Mario eats the sandwich
BATTLE OVER

Mario: I have-a my revenge!

Mario ran out of the house, off a cliff, landed on an orange Note Block, and sprang into coin heaven. He collected the coins and “made a deposit” and threw them into the nearby pipe.

Mario: There you-a go! Now how am I-a gonna get down-a now?

Mario then realized that clouds are only gases and water vapor and he fell through the clouds and landed in Water Land. After getting his head above the water, Mario got eaten by Boss Bass.

EL FIN

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