It’s a beautiful day in the Mushroom Kingdom. The birds are chirping, the sun is shining, and a huge cloud of smoke is billowing out of the spot Mario’s house used to be.... Wait a sec? Lemme guess. Mario blew up his house again. Let’s take a look, shall we?

Luigi: Mario, why did you just blow up our house?

Mario: Cheesebuddy got stuck in the microwave, but the microwave blew up cuz I pressed a big, red button on the side.

Luigi: Idiot! That was the self-destruct button!

Mario: But I had to rescue Cheesebuddy!!!

Luigi: Oh, so you go blow up the house?!

Mario: Maybe...

Luigi: Why was I born your brother?

Mario: Cuz you were.

Luigi: IT WAS A RHETORICAL QUESTION!!!

Luigi smacks Mario on the head. Mario starts screaming bloody murder.

Mario: WWWWWWWWWHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!

Mario screamed so loudly, you’d think Luigi shot him with an M-16 rifle.

Luigi: MARIO!!! SHUT THE @#!#$ UP!!!

Mario: Ooooohhh, you say bad word!!! Me tell Mommy!

Mario runs off to Peach’s castle. BIG mistake.

Peach: Now I can sit and enjoy my quadruple cheeseburger with cheese juice.

Mario: CCCCCHHHHHHHHHHHHEEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!

Mario leaps at the table laughing like a maniac. He is making very disgusting noises.

Mario: BWA HA HA HA HA HA!!! *slpop* CHEESE!!! MY BABY!!! *smacksmack*

After several terrifying seconds of Mario scarfing down Peach’s meal, Luigi bursts in.

Luigi: MARIO!!! WHAT IN THE WORLD DID YOU JUST DO?!

Mario: *burp* I had a meal.

Mario also ate the table. He burps out a table leg.

Peach: WHAT IS WRONG WITH MARIO?! (And he’s the one rescuing me all the time...)

Luigi: Mario, you’re embarrassing me....

Mario: But cheese is like my brother. Only closer...

Mario lifts up his shirt. A hideous, pulsating thing is connecting Mario to a wheel of cheese. Peach passes out. Mario rolls out of the castle and onto the  beach.

Mario: I’m thirsty after all that cheese!

Mario pulls a straw out of nowhere and drains every last bit of water.

Surfer Toad 1: Dude, that was, like, so uncool.

Surfer Toad 2: Chyaaa.

Luigi: Mario, do you cause chaos everywhere you go?

Mario: There is a slight possibility of that.

Mario somehow returns to his normal size and runs to Bowser’s castle.

Luigi: MARIO! COME BACK!

Mario is already at Bowser’s castle. Bowser is staring out his window.

Bowser: Uh oh. Mario’s coming! Better spring my new CheeseTrap!!!

Bowser presses a button and a slingshot appears. It launches a hunk of cheese into the horizon. Mario spots it and runs at a miraculous speed to get it. He doesn’t return for two months.

(Mario’s friends, even Bowser, partied for those two months.)

Have a Scribble of your own? Email me!
Go back to Lemmy's Scribbles.
Go back to my main page.