The Dryest Bones: All right, Chuck, now you get to interview the guy in the seat that said he wanted to be interviewed.

Chuck: I forgot who he was.

The Dryest Bones: Hookbill.

Chuck: Oh, him.

The Dryest Bones: Is there a problem?

Chuck: He was originally a Baseball Boy, before Bowser turned him into a Koopa. He gave me a run for my money back in the days.

In "The Days"...

Hookbill (in a car): Run for the money, Chuck!

Chuck: (chasing the car) GIVE ME BACK MY NICKEL!

Now...

The Dryest Bones: 0.0  Don't care!

Chuck: Awww...

Rose: What do I do?

The Dryest Bones: Intern things.

Yishotimi: What do I do?

The Dryest Bones: Fix the portal to the oasis, it hasn't worked for a while.

Kamek: And me?

The Dryest Bones: Pizza things with me.

Kamek: YAY!

Chuck: Save me a slice!

Kamek: Sure! (Not on your life.)

Chuck: Thanks.

At the studio...

Chuck: Welcome, people who really don't want to fall in the spiked baseball pit that I just installed.

(The audience sees that they're suspended over a pit of spiked baseballs. A Fuzzy corpse is seen in it.)

Lemmy: LEMMY'S INTERVIEW SHOW!

Chuck: Well, today, I interview Hookbill the Koopa!

Hookbill: I hate you.

Chuck: I know.

Ludwig: I know everything!

Mario: I'm-a Mario!

Chuck: AXE!

(A Dark Bones gets an axe and cuts off Mario and Ludwig's chairs. They fall to their doom.)

Hookbill: Didn't you kill off Ludwig last Interview?

Chuck: Oh yeah... Anyway, why is your face your weak point?

Hookbill: You and the other Koopas kept hitting me with footballs in the face. Eventually, it became extremely vulnerable to projectiles, while my body became stronger.

Chuck: Why do you turn back into a regular Koopa Troopa when Yoshi beats you?

Hookbill: Kamek's magic only really hit my shell. It got knocked off, so I got un-magicy and returned to normal.

Chuck: All right, so why can't you use shell-based attacks?

Hookbill: Unlike all other Koopa Troopas, the bottom of my shell doesn't have the oil inside it needed to use my shell as a spinning weapon.

Chuck: Why don't we go to the audience now?

Hookbill: All right.

Camera Lakitu: Actually, it's time for one of our commercial breaks.

Chuck: All right then.

(Commercial Start)

Donkey Kong: I hate Mini-Marios!

Mini-Mario: Hi!

(DK explodes.)

Now you can blow up Donkey Kong with the help of the Mini-Marios. Mario VS Donkey Kong X: Watch DK Explode. Coming to a Nintendo console near you.

(Commercial End.)

Chuck: That was short.

Camera Lakitu: We don't get many sponsors.

Chuck: Oh well, Seat MYNAMESOUNDSLIKEYOURS!

Hooktail: How do you spit out eggs when Yoshi stomps on you?

Hookbill: I worked in the Koopa Army before I fought Yoshi and Baby Mario. One day, a Yoshi came up to me and shot 1,000 eggs down my gullet. I was so full and hurt, I quit the army until Super Mario World 2: Yoshi's Island. Yoshi jumping on me made me throw them up.

Chuck: Ewww, Seat YOUWEREUSELESS!

Baby Bowser: Why did ya charge at the gween donkey? Why not just use eggys?

Hookbill: I couldn't force the eggs to come out and, as previously stated, I can't use shell attacks. Body slamming and charging were the only things I could do.

Chuck: Seat RANDOMCAMEO!

Link: Are you related to Kent C. Koopa?

Hookbill: I'm his aunt's uncle's dad's daughter's third cousin, twice removed.

Chuck: (Why is it always cousins?) Well, that's all the time we have for today, so prepare for the PAIN BUTTON!

Button: PUSH!

(A giant sign appears on Hookbill that says "Ganondorf is plotting evil inside my stomach. Kill him and me, Link!")

Link: I have no idea what that says, but I think I'll kill you now because you have Ganondorf inside you!

(Link kills Hookbill. Coincidentally, Ganondorf was really in there, and transformed into Ganon. Link gets killed, and Ganon follows Chuck to the oasis.)

At the oasis...

Ganon: ROAR!

Kamek: *yawn*

Yishotimi and Rose: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!

The Dryest Bones: I have a Triforce Shard!

Gannon: Me want!

The Dryest Bones: Roll over.

(Ganon does so.)

The Dryest Bones: Play dead.

(Ganon does so.)

The Dryest Bones: Die.

(Ganon does so.)

The Dryest Bones: That was easy. I'm the Hero of Time now!

(A banner randomly falls from the sky that says "Hero of Time" on it. Then, Ludwig explodes.)

Ludwig: HEY! THAT'S THE THIRD TIME YOU'VE KILLED ME IN THE PAST TWO INTERVIEWS!

(Well, you have four lives, right?)

Ludwig: Oh yeah...

(Ludwig randomly discovers a cove of 1-Up Mushrooms.)

Chuck: That was random.

The Dryest Bones: Dang it. LEMMY!

Lemmy: END TRANSMISSION!

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