Kamek: Well, I'm bored.

Yishotimi: Bored...

Rose: BORRRRED! I'm going to Outrageous!

(Rose gets on a Wiggler Bus to Outrageous.)

Chuck: BOOOOOOOOOOOOORRRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD!!!

The Dryest Bones: Are you guys always like this?

Kamek: Yes.

Yishotimi: Yes...

Chuck: YYYYYYYYYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!

The Dryest Bones: Well then, I guess I'll have to do the Interview. I've given you all a stack of mystery-flavored pizzas. Enjoy!

(The Dryest Bones blackmails Larry somehow and takes him to the studio.)

At the studio...

Larry: Huff... puff...

(Larry faints.)

The Dryest Bones: Awww, that was fun. Well, the studio is right in front of me, so META KNIGHT!

(Meta Knight carries The Dryest Bones to his chair.)

Meta Knight: Why am I your lawyer?

The Dryest Bones: Because I can always replace you with Don Patch.

Meta Knight: Right!

Audience: QUIT THE SHANANAGANS AND INTERVIEW!

The Dryest Bones: I hate you! Except for Mario, I LOATHE you!

Mario: Yippee!

The Dryest Bones: Anyway, welcome to...

Lemmy: LEMMY'S INTERVIEW SHOW!

The Dryest Bones: Today, I interview the all-seeing Mr. I!

Mr. I: I see you! And you! And you!

Several hours later...

Mr. I: And you! And you! And you! And that's it!

The Dryest Bones: How many seets do we have again?

Camera Lakitu: 1,500, but there were 1,000,000 Microgoombas in Seat 1/8.

The Dryest Bones: EVIL! CHUCK ATTACK!

(Seat 1/8 falls into Chuck's spiked baseball pit.)

The Dryest Bones: All right, so how exactly do you shoot lasers?

Mr. I: One day, the Manta Storm passed over me. It gave me all of its spare electrical energy, which let me attack with zapping laser beams. If it still had the spare energy, Manta's goop would've been lethal to Mario.

The Dryest Bones: How were you made?

Mr. I: Bowser attacked a person who is now blind. He absorbed its essence in a ball to increase his minions' accuracy. However, it fused with the ball and I was made. And then, I was cloned.

Lemmy: And I never forgave him for that!

The Dryest Bones: All right, so why were you in Lethal Lava Land? Wouldn't the heat make you water?

Mr. I: Yes, but that was the point. It was Bowser's punishment for me not stopping Mario in Boo's Big Haunt.

The Dryest Bones: How did you get so huge in Mario Party 2?

Mr. I: I drainws energy from the Horror Land moon, and grew.

The Dryest Bones: Now, shall we go to the audience?

Mr. I: When did you get the British accent?

The Dryest Bones: Oh crumpits! My voice tone must be on the fritz, old bean. Well, that's all water under the bridge, nudge nudge, wink wink!

Mr. I: Since you said nudge nudge, wink wink out loud, I'm guessing you're insane now. Seat WHYAMIREADINGTHIS?

You: Why am I reading this, why am I suddenly a seat, why is the author dictating what I say, and why is Mr. I an accessory in Super Duel Mode in Mario Party 5?

Mr. I: In order: you felt like it, The Dryest Bones kidnapped you, he feels like it, and Mario shrunk me when he beat me. I grew to that size by Mario Party 5, and I was just trying not to be forgotten.

The Dryest Bones: Well, I'm back to normal! Seat SOMETHINGELSE!

Mr. Spleen: Why did you continue to look at Mario when he was spinning around you?

Mr. I: Mario took my contacts. I was staring him down, trying to get a clear shot with my laser. When I realized what was going on, it was too late...

The Dryest Bones: Seat THE1-UPCOVEGAVEMESOMANYLIVESYOUCOULDNTPOSSIBLYKILLME!

Ludwig: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

The Dryest Bones: The ULTIMATE security!

(A Whomp falls on Ludwig. He comes back, but a Thwomp falls on him. This goes on for a while, and Ludwig asks his question.)

Ludwig: Why did *gets crushed by a Thwomp* you like *gets crushed by a Whomp* Peach in *gets crushed by Gourmet Guy* Mario Party Advance *gets crushed by Exor*?

Mr. I: I got a Mini-Peach as a wee lad. I worshipped how fun it was, until it fell in lava. Then, I wanted the real thing!

The Dryest Bones: Wee lad? Why do I always interview the wierdos? Seat WHYME?

Whomp at the bottom of the pile that Ludwig's in: Why can't you move except in Mario Party 2?

Mr I: The invisible roots of my eye were attached to whatever they were on. In Horror Land, I could just roll and didn't need roots.

The Dryest Bones: Well, that's all the time we have...

Camera Lakitu: No it's not! We still have 10 rolls of film left!

The Dryest Bones: Yeah, but I want to be gone before...

(A giant group of Kikoris, Hyrulians, and Zoras break into the room.)

Group of Zelda people: IT'S THE HERO OF TIME! LET'S SELL HIS BODY ON THE INTERNET!

(The group of Zelda people chase after The Dryest Bones. On the way, he kills Mr. I with a sword, steals chickens from Grass Land, puts out the Angry Sun in Desert Land, dries up Water Land, shrinks Giant Land, puts Sky Land underground, keeps Ice Land the same, freezes all of the pipes in Pipe Land, and spreads light in Dark Land. The group fall in a lava pool in Dark Land, and The Dryest Bones goes back to his oasis.)

The Dryest Bones: So, how were the mystery-flavored pizzas?

Kamek: IT WAS MADE OF PURE FIRE!

Yishotimi: IT WAS MADE OF DRIED ICE! I SPENT THE ENTIRE INTERVIEW GETTING MYSELF OUT WITH A PICKAXE!

Chuck: It was a hot dog... I liked it!

The Dryest Bones: Oh yeah... That one was supposed to go to Rose, who is a vegetarian.

(Suddenly, everyone from every land terrorized comes out.)

People from the Lands: KILL HIM!

The Dryest Bones: LEMMY! SAVE ME!

Lemmy: END TRANSMISSION!

People: Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!

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