P.T.: We are finally rid of the Dora armada.
Rest of the gang: How?
P.T.: I gave them Lemmy, in return for them leaving us alone.
Rest of the gang: …
P.T.: What?
Bogmire: Oh, my aunt is jealous that you interviewed the Shadow Sirens, so now she wants to be interviewed.
P.T.: She’s your aunt, so you interview her!
Bogmire: D’oh!
(In the studio…)
Bogmire: Welcome! I’m going to interview my aunt, the Shadow Queen!
Audience: Gasp!
Bogmire: What? It’s been known since I was interviewed! It’s even why I was in the ending of Lemmy’s Mansion 2! Anyway, come on down, Aunt Queenie!
Queenie: Hello- DON’T CALL ME THAT!
(Or what?)
Queenie: I’ll possess you.
(I have no body. I’m the narrator!)
Queenie: I’ll flush your GBA down the toilet.
(Okay! No need to go that far!)
Shadow Queen: That’s better.
Bogmire: Ahhhh! We’re on page 2, and there have been no questions! Okay. Were you what destroyed the ancient town?
Shadow Queen: Yes. I possessed a meteor. You should know this.
Bogmire: I’m asking for their sake.
Shadow Queen: Ah.
Bogmire: Why did you destroy Grodus? … Well, his stunt double, at least.
Shadow Queen: He tried to boss me around. What he didn’t know was, that no one should. Beldam just lied to him, is all.
Bogmire: Ah. Why is your body kinda spirally in the battle, but not out of battle?
Shadow Queen: To help me fit on the stage better.
Bogmire: Why were you in the Tattle Log? No one has seen you!
Shadow Queen: That was just for the convenience of the player.
Bogmire: Ah. Why was your picture determined by what form you were in? I mean that if you were tattled in Peach form, you appeared that way in the log. But you appeared in your regular form if you were tattled at that time! Why?
Shadow Queen: Again, convenience of the player.
Bogmire: Ah. Again. Was there a Shadow King?
Shadow Queen: No. I’m single.
Shadow Mario: What?!
Bogmire: Hey, that was in Shady Parakoopa’s FF’s! Not anything by P.T.!
Shadow Mario: Oh.
Bogmire: Audience Questions: Seat BIGBOMB.
Bulky Bob-omb: Why did you attack the entire audience?
Shadow Queen: To help me refill my energy.
Bogmire: Seat KOOPAFAMILY’SARCHNEMESIS.
Mario: Why did you only give one Star Point?!
Shadow Queen: I was the final boss. It really wouldn’t matter.
Mario: What about after the game?
Shadow Queen: Well, that’s optional.
Mario: Ah.
Bogmire: Why do people keep saying that? Seat CHAMPION.
Rawk Hawk: What exactly are the Dead Hands? And couldn’t you think of another name? That name is just creepy and disturbing.
Shadow Queen: The Dead Hands were an alternate form of my hands. And no. Nintendo decided to call them that, and wouldn’t give me a say in this.
Bogmire: That’s about it. Seeya!
(Lemmy bursts in.)
Lemmy: P.T.!
P.T.: Huh?
Lemmy: HOW DARE YOU GIVE ME TO THE DORAS?! YOU WILL DIE!
(P.T. calls someone on his cell phone. Soon, a pizza guy comes, and drops a spicy pizza on Lemmy.)
Lemmy: AAHH! THE SPICINESS! IT BURNS! LITERALLY! BUT ESPECIALLY FOR ME!
(Lemmy faints.)
Pizza Guy: End Transmission!
P.T.: You don’t get to say th-
(Transmission Ended.)
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