G.G: Ahhh. It’s nice to be back in the old Interview studio.

Koopa 13: Yeah, after the Dark Beings disappeared.

Chompy: Bark bark.

G.G: Yeah, and we're rich now, too, so we can do whatever we want. Lemmy, go pick Wario’s nose.

Lemmy: But I don’t want to.

G.G: I’ll give you 30 coins if you do.

Lemmy: Done.

(Lemmy goes and picks Wario’s nose.)

Wario: Why are you picking my nose?

Lemmy: I don’t know?

G.G: Ok, now then, since we are the new heroes of Lemmy Land, we should interview a hero. So our Interview for today is with Mario!

(A pipe comes out from the ground and Mario comes out from the pipe and sits down.)

Mario: Hello, it’s-a me, Mario.

G.G: Ok, my first question is, how did you do that?

Mario: Do what?

G.G: Make a pipe come out.

Mario: What pipe?

G.G: That pipe in front of you!

Mario: Oh. What’s a pipe?

G.G: *sigh* Never mind

Koopa 13: Are you from Brooklyn or the Mushroom World?

Mario: Well my real parents were plumbers in New York, but me and my brother Luigi were kidnapped by the stork and given to Toadsworth. Then after we helped beat the shroobs we became heroes.

Shroob: @#$!@%!#$%@!!!

G.G: Well they didn’t seem too happy about it, Chompy, ask something.

Chompy: Bark Bark.

G.G: He says, why do you wear red?

Mario: Because it’s the same color as KETCHUP!!!

(He takes out a bottle of ketchup and sprays it all over the audience.)

Koopa 13: Hey, what’s the matter? You want everyone to love red?

Mario: Oh, I don’t want them to love red, I NEED THEM TO LOVE RED! MUHAHAHAHAHA! I mean, it’s-a me, Mario.

G.G: Right. Ok, next question, what do you do when you’re not trying to save the world?

(Mario leaves and comes back in a banana suit and starts dancing to the peanut butter jelly song.)

G.G: Stop dancing or I'll sock you.

(Mario continues to dance. G.G. then throws a dirty sock at him.)

Mario: Oh, so smelly!

G.G: Told you I would SOCK you, now sit down.

(He does so.)

Koopa 13: Next question, what is your true favorite food? Is it pasta?

Mario: YOU LIE! YOU LIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIE! I mean yes. Yes it is.

Chompy: Bark.

G.G: He says, do your feet get tired with all the walking you do?

Mario: Are you kidding?

(He takes his shoe off and shows Mushrooms and fungus growing off of his feet.)

G.G: Ewwwwww! Dude, gross! That Is not cool.

Koopa 13: I never knew that in ages!

G.G: All right, my next question is, how does it feel to be hated by so many evil villains?

Mario: It’s a not that bad. I know they could never get me.

(He suddenly ducks and a hammer flies over his head.)

Mario: Usually they do a lot more than that, but anyway, it’s all good.

(A Bob-omb lands next to him, ready to explode.)

Mario: Hang on a second.

(He takes the Bob-omb and puts it in Chompy's mouth, where a small explosion sound is heard.)

Chompy: That’s a spicy meatball.

Koopa 13: My question is, is Peach really your true love even if you rescue her?

Mario: No, it’s just part of the job.

Peach: Mario! How could you? I thought we had something happening between us!

Mario: Who are you?

(She runs out crying.)

G.G: Ok, now that that’s over with, let's go to the audience. Seat 5.

Grodus: Are you going to restore my body?

Mario: Not anytime soon. Besides, you're doing fine as you are, right?

Grodus: Oh yes, being nothing more then a head being used as a soccer ball is tons of fun, IDIOT!

Koopa 13: Seat Super 1,566, what is your question?

Bowser: Mario, there is something that I want to tell you right here, right now, so listen up. I… I… I AM THE MIGHTY KING BOWSER!

G.G: Chompy, do your thing.

Chompy: BARK Bark!

Bowser: Wait! No no nooooooo! I have a real question, why do I have to always attack you knowing that you’re going to beat me?

Mario: Because I have ketchup!!!

Bowser: Oh yes, that’s right.

G.G: Seat 56.

Koopa Bros: Why don’t you wear something cooler than that plumber outfit?

Mario: Because then I would have no place to store my ketchup. Besides, you're not in any position to criticise my outfit.

G.G: He’s right, dude. Look at you guys, you look like Zorro gone bad.

Koopa 13: I've got to go to a bathroom!

G.G: Didn’t need to hear that, dude. Just go already.

(Koopa 13 leaves.)

G.G: Seat 66.

Lakitu: Why do you grow small every time an enemy hits you?

Mario: My bones are very sensitive. One hit and I shrink in size.

G.G: All right, that's all we have for…

(Suddenly half the stage explodes and Koopa 13 is seen below where the explosion was.)

Lemmy: What in the world happened?

Koopa 13: Looks like the Dark Beings replaced the toilets with Bill Blasters. Very awkward. Anyway, END TRANSMISSION!

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