Doopliss: WHADDAYA MEAN YOU HIRED A BOOK CHAR-

(Suddenly, Went and his interviewing team burst in.)

Dooplisselle: ... You know we have a door.

Went: We KNOW!

Dooplisselle: ...

(DYoshi spots Fawful.)

DYoshi: ...

(They all turn toward DYoshi.)

Dooplisselle: Uh oh...

DYoshi: &*Y&%*^%$%*^*&($^*%!!!^*(%^&*%$^&*()*%&$&^^!!!

(Dooplisselle grabs DYoshi, restraining her from Fawful.)

DYoshi: No! I wanna kill him!

Dooplisselle: Not today!

Went: So let me get this straight... We are interviewing with a book-obsessed Koopa/Duplighost, a rainbow, mindless Yoshi... that Goomba, and I?

Doopliss: Yes!

DYoshi: Zzzzz... No.

Dooplisselle: Why?

DYoshi: I’m not leaving before I can kill-

(Dooplisselle drags Went, Goomba, and DYoshi muttering something that sounds like “Boys and mindless, rainbow Yoshis...”)

Dooplisselle: Ok, now that we have met everybody, let’s start the Interview!

DYoshi: But I want to k-

Goomba: Yeah! Let’s start! I’m ready to be interviewed!

Dooplisselle: Eh... I thoughr we were interviewing Birdo. Plus, I have already interviewed a Goomba.

Goomba: WHAAT? You said-

Went: YEAH! LET’S START! With us, Birdo!

(Birdo enters the room. Yoshi starts clapping extra loud.)

Yoshi: Yoshi likes Birdo! Birdo is the best! Yoshi prefers Birdo rather than 100 cookies!

Toad: Please, stop! I can’t hear anything!

Dooplisselle: Firstly, I want to know one thing: what species are you? A female Yoshi, an Ostro...?

Birdo: I’m a Birdo.

DYoshi: Woah! Today we have someone intelligent!

Yoshi: Don’t talk to her that way!

(Yoshi eats Toad and throws an egg at DYoshi.)

Toad: My head!

DYoshi: HOW DARE YOU?! I also know how to throw eggs!

DYoshi eats Goomba and throws the egg at Yoshi.

Goomba: Oww... I won’t eat eggs again...

Dooplisselle: Boys and rainbow Yoshis...

Birdo: Don’t tell me!

Went: Zzzz... Ehh yeah! I was asleep! Err... Why did most of you work for Wart?

Birdo: Because Bowser was planning to conquer Dinosaur Land! And Wart promised us that, if he stole Bowser’s throne, he would stop it! Plus, he gave us a lot of bows!

Dooplisselle: If you and Yoshi are different species, how can you guys be in love?

Birdo: We are? Well, I’m dating Popple then.

Yoshi: WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT?!

Birdo: I never should’ve said that...

Dooplisselle: Popple is also another species. And I thought you beat him up!

Birdo: Good friends always fight... But I’m going back to Yoshi for that.

Dooplisselle: Whatever.

DYoshi: What are your hobbies?

Birdo: Cooking, eating, having Yoshi around, and racing.

Went: What did you like most, the good side or the bad side?

Birdo: The good side is funnier. I also get to spend more time with Yoshi.

Goomba: Where did you get that ring?

Birdo: Yoshi gave it to me.

Dooplisselle: Ok, audience questions. Seat FOOD!

Gourmet Guy: How do you eat?

Birdo: I have teeth! But I can hide them when I’m going to throw an egg.

Went: And I thought that was your nose... Seat, um, ILIKEPINK!

Peach: Do you like parties? Because I’m throwing a party tomorrow to celebrate that tomorrow is Tuesday!

Birdo: Yes, I like parties, but I didn’t like when Bowser jumped on me... It took me a week to smooth my bow out!

DYoshi: Seat COLD!

Ice Bully: How can you spit fireballs?

Birdo: We ate some hot chilli before battling.

Goomba: My turn! Seat ILIKEGREENANDDAISYBUTIHATEMYSTUPIDBROTHERANDBOOSOHIHATEBOOS *arf arf*!

Luigi: How did you recover your voice?

Birdo: I wasn’t her! Cackletta stole the voice of another Birdo! Now she works demolishing old houses.

Dooplisselle: It isn’t true. She is still trying to takeover the world. Seat CHEESE!

Mario: How do Birdos come in different colors?

Birdo: Gender. Pink is a boy, blue is a girl, and red... we don’t really know.

Dooplisselle: ...

DYoshi: Seat IDIOT!

Bowser: How do pink Birdos keep their bows on their heads while others don’t?

Birdo: WE super-glued them to our heads.

Went: Well, if there aren't any questions left, I think w-

Kooper: Wait! I have a question!

Went: I SAID THERE AREN'T ANY QUESTIONS LEFT. So, Dooplisselle, thanks for letting us to enter your studio, but we are going. Goomba, pick up our things!

(Goomba grabs some chairs, a phone, and Doopliss.)

Doopliss: Can you leave me in the market? I have to buy something for dinner.

Dooplisselle: A-HEM.

Went: Oh, yeah, I forgot. END TRANSMISSION!

Dooplisselle: You know I didn’t mea-

Have an Interview or a suggestion of your own? Email me!
Go back to Lemmy's Interviews.
Go back to my main page.