(We start at the X-Naut base in a flower meadow.)
Grodus: Lord Crump, you dope! Why did you relocate us to a stupid field?
Crump: Buh huh huh huh!
(He dies again.)
Grodus: Ugh. You, X-Naut, did you bring the prisoners?
X-Naut: Yes sir, and we used the exploding transporter as well.
(They bring in our three heroes chained up like dogs.)
G.G: Huh? What the? What’s going on?
Koopa 13: It’s the X-Nauts!
Chompy: Bark bark.
Grodus: Greetings, my interviewers. I, the great Grodus, have brought you here to interview me.
G.G: Well what if we-
Grodus: SILENCE!!!
(He electrocutes them.)
Koopa 13: But you’re only a head.
Grodus: Stop making fun of me.
(He electrocutes them again.)
Grodus: If you don’t want me to strike you again, then interview me, NOW!!!
G.G: Ok, why-
Grodus: SHUT UP!
(He does it again.)
Grodus: I want the Koopa to start.
Koopa 13: Zzz...
(He does it once more.)
Grodus: I changed my mind, I want the Chain Chomp to start.
Chompy: Bark-
Grodus: Shut up!
(You know what’s coming.)
Grodus: I changed my mind again, I want the Goomba to start.
G.G: Why- Ugh, never mind. Qhy are you just a head?
Grodus: Why do you think? That stupid Shadow Queen betrayed me and did this to me. Dumb turtle, START!
Koopa 13: She felt that she shouldn’t be taking orders from an inferior being like you. My question is, are you some sort of machine that was created, or something else?
Grodus: I’m Smithy’s older brother.
Chompy: Bark bark.
Grodus: Shut up.
(He shocks him.)
Grodus: Goomba, go!
G.G: How did you become the X-Naut leader?
Grodus: Easy, I just said free donuts if you join, and, well, we're packed.
Koopa 13: I want some!
Grodus: Too bad, ASK ME A QUESTION!
Koopa 13: You and Smithy are brothers, right? But why do did you guys create your armies instead of teaming up?
Grodus: Because we have been rivals since our baby ages since he created pong and started a generation.
G.G: How did you get a moon base?
Grodus: Around the time that Smithy started his business, I had my X-Nauts start making it so that we could outdo his stupid base.
Koopa 13: Did you create all the robot stuff?
Grodus: No, after I gathered together my crew of X-Nauts and separated them into groups, I had the X-Naut PhDs make all the Yuxes, while the Elite X-Nauts made the machines and everything and the normal X-Nauts just stood like bumps on a log.
G.G: How did you separate them into groups?
Grodus: By seeing which one was better at certain things and putting them into the groups that best suited theire skills. AUDIENCE TIME!!!
G.G: But there is no aud-
(You know what happens.)
Grodus: Silence. X-Naut, SPEAK!
X-Naut: Why don’t we get raises?
Grodus: BURN HIM!!!
(Elite X-Nauts take him and throw him in a fire pit.)
Grodus: YOU, SPEAK!
X-Naut PhD: Who do you think you will have replace you when you die, Sir Grodus?
Grodus: Probably Lord Crump after he comes back to life. Are you planning a mutiny?
X-Naut PhD: No, I-
Grodus: BURN HIM!!!
(They throw him into the fire pit.)
Grodus: Last question, GO!
Elite X-Naut: Why haven’t you built a new body for yourself?
Grodus: I dunno, BURN!
(He burns.)
Grodus: Ok, that’s it, now you three shall be my slaves for eternity!
G.G: WHAT?!
Koopa 13: No way!
Chompy: BARK!
Grodus: Then you shall-
(Suddenly the ground explodes and Lemmy comes and kicks Grodus's head.)
X-Naut: We must protect Sir Grodus!
(As they attack, lemmy throws a smoke bomb and get the three of them out of there.)
G.G: I cant believe we were saved by Lemmy.
Koopa 13: I am very pleased that a hippie actually helped us.
Lemmy: Look, the only reason I saved you is because you saved me, and I didn’t want to owe you one.
G.G: Well well, looks like Lemmy has a bit of a tender side.
Chompy: Bark : )
Koopa 13: Yeah, about that...
G.G: What?
Koopa 13: Grodus.
G.G: What about him?
Koopa 13: Yeah, him.
(The three of them are electrocuted.)
G.G: Oh no! We forgot to take off the collars.
Koopa 13: Then let’s take them off and put them on Grodus.
(They get shocked even harder and harder and harder.)
G.G: Can't move... Too strong!
(We see Lemmy pushing the button, electrocuting them.)
Lemmy: Heh heh heh, the ball is in Lemmy’s court now. END TRANSMISSION!
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