4 days before the Interview….

Drake: Hmmm… All right, this is the first time we all get to interview, brothers.

(Drake Guy is sitting at a card table with a Shy Guy dressed like Kamek, a green Lantern Ghost with a purple hat and shoes, and a Shy Guy sitting on top of a crate wearing a tophat.)

Kamek Guy: W00T! Finally, I get to show my competence.

Waluigi Ghost: B-but I might interview s-s-something scary!

Obstacle Guy: Sweeeeeeet, dude! I get to trap an audience.

Drake: Well, let’s roll call first, shall we? Ahem, Whamek?

Kamek Guy: Present.

Drake: Sparlunk?

Waluigi Ghost: H-here.

Drake: Klyde?

Obstacle Guy: WHAZZUUUUP?

Drake: Okay, now let’s decide who to interview.

Group: Hmmmmmmm…

Drake: I need somebody HUGE and POWUH-FULL!!!

Whamek: I want somebody who can manage to perplex the minds of the viewers! SUBLIMINOL MESSAGING POWUH!

Sparlunk: Nobody sc-scary, please. Es-especially g-g-ghosts!

Klyde: Heh heh, I’m gonna interview whoever I trap.

Drake: I GOT IT!

~

(Drake Guy is sitting on a lawn chair on a stage.)

Drake: Hello, trusty viewers! I finally got enough funding to rent the Paper Mario 2 stage!

Random Audience Goomba: How’d ya get enough money? Ya only did one Interview.

Drake: Uh... BURN!

(Drake puts down his hood and burns the Goomba with his flames.)

Somewhere, in Toadwood forest…..

Popple (tied to tree): Argh! I’ll get that thief back, see?

Back again….

Drake: Anyway-

Burnt Goomba: I can’t feel my legs…

Drake: SILENCE!!!

(Drake burns the Goomba again.)

Drake: As I was saying before I was so rudely interrupted, I am going to interview the coolest monster of them all, SPIDER BOSS!

… *cricket chirp…*

Random Paratroopa: … Who?

Drake: Ya know, the big spider thing from that Spider Stomp minigame?

… *tumbleweed…*

Drake: From Mario Party? Anyone? Well, I’m gonna interview it and let you know a bit more. But first, I would like to introduce my new cast! In that corner over there, you’ll see Lightning Guy!

(Everybody turns and looks at a yellow Shy Guy wearing sunglasses working at the lighting compartment.)

Drake: And behind the stage is my Intern Guy!

(Everybody looks at a green Shy Guy who peeps from behind the curtain.)

Intern Guy: I have a name, ya know.

Drake: Right, Intern Guy. Last but not least, Camera Guy-

(A red Shy Guy working at the camera pokes from behind it.)

Camera Guy: I’m a Camera DUDE!

Drake: …

Audience: …

Intern Guy: I HAVE A NAME, YA KNOW!!!

Drake: … Back to the Interview! Spider Boss, come on down!

A HUGE yellow- and black-striped spider wearing tennis shoes crashes through the ceiling.

Drake: Er… Nice entrance.

Spider Boss: Thank you.

Drake: First question! How come you’re so incredibly huge?

Spider Boss: I’m naturally like this. Many adult spiders grow up to become large like this.

Drake: Next, are you a boy or girl?

Spider Boss: I am a girl, duh.

Drake: No need to be rude. Do you have a name? Spider Boss seems like a name a bad parent would give.

Spider Boss: I’m called Spidette.

Drake: Creative. What are your main attacks?

Spidette: I can shoot three web bullets and ram into people. I can also do a shockwave stomp, but Nintendo thought that two moves were enough to show.

Drake: Cool. Do you think you’ll be in any upcoming games?

Spidette: I doubt I’ll be in anything other than a few more Mario Parties.

Drake: Yeah, that seems about right. Are you a minion of any kind of master?

Spidette: How rude. But yes, Koopa Kid thought I’d be a good way to stop Mario and his friends.

Drake: Let’s go to audience questions.

(Camera Guy- I mean, Camera DUDE raises his hand.)

Drake: Camera Guy, put your hand down.

Camera Guy: I’m a Camera DUDE! I have a question, though!

Drake: Fine.

Camera DUDE: Radical! Do you have any Mario Party goers you especially dislike?

Spidette: Ugh. Yoshi and Birdo. They are SO annoying. But Mario was kinda crazy with that laser gun.

Drake: Next! Seat 777!

Flutter: Why’d you capture me?

Spidette: It wasn’t personal or anything. Koopa Kid didn’t want you helping the enemy.

Drake: Batter up! Seat 666!

Baseball Boy: Were all those spider enemies related to you?

Spidette: The medium ones were more minions of Koopa Kid, but the smallest ones were some of my kids.

Drake: Almost done. Seat 54,321!

Burnt Goomba: Ouch. How’d the Partygoers get the laser guns? How could you let that happen?

Spidette: It wasn’t my fault. E. Gadd just HAD to intervene and help them out. We didn’t know they had them until they fought me.

Drake: Now, time for the RPG BATTLE HOUR!!! That’s the part where we pit our interviewee against an audience member! Hmmm… Flutter seems good.

(Flutter gets sprung onto the stage.)

Flutter: OW! Well, I'd better get my cousins to help me out.

Spidette: Kids! Mommy needs help!

BATTLE START!

Spidette: 100/100
Spidea: 25/25
Spidufo: 25/25
VS.
Flutter: 50/50
Wiggler: 50/50
Giant Wiggler: 50/50

Spidette used Triple Web Shot! All enemies lost speed!
Spidea used Web Shot! Flutter lost speed!
Spidufo used Fang Swipe! Flutter lost 10 HP!
DING! Spidea gets to go again because of speed!
Spidea used Stomp! Flutter lost 5 HP!

Flutter used Wind Punch! Spidette lost 11 HP!
Wiggler used Earthquake! All enemies lost 5 HP!
Giant Wiggler used Train Wreck! Both he and Spidea lost 16 HP!

Spidette: 84/100
Spidea: 9/25
Spidufo: 20/25
VS.
Flutter: 35/50
Wiggler: 50/50
Giant Wiggler: 34/50

Spidette used Ram! Giant Wiggler lost 15 HP!
Spidea used Web Bandage! Regained 14 HP!
Spidufo used Hover Stomp! Giant Wiggler lost 8 HP!
DING! Spidea goes again!
Spidea used Shockwave Stomp! Giant Wiggler lost 6 HP!

Flutter used Seed Cannon! Spidette was unaffected!
Wiggler used Flower Gas! The field was covered in a thick yellow fog.
Giant Wiggler used Run Over! Spidette lost 10 HP!

Spidette: 74/100
Spidea: 23/25
Spidufo: 20/25
VS.
Flutter: 35/50
Wiggler: 50/50
Giant Wiggler: 5/50

Spidette used Shockwave Stomp! All enemies lost 7 HP! Gaint Wiggler KOed!
Spidea used Web Arrow! Flutter lost 6 HP!
Spidufo used Hang Glider! Flutter lost 11 HP!
DING! Spidea goes again!
Spidea used item! Podoboo Ping Pong Ball released! Extra damage on Flutter for 20 HP loss!

Flutter used Wind Punch! Spidea lost 10 HP!
Wiggler used Trample! Miss!

Spidette: 74/100
Spidea: 13/25
Spidufo: 20/25
VS.
Flutter: 1/50
Wiggler: 50/50

Spidette used item! Balancer released! Flutter’s HP was converted to 25! Wiggler’s HP was converted to 25!
Spidea used Web Net! Flutter and Wiggler stuck together!
Spidufo used Hover Stomp! Flutter and Wiggler lost 7 HP!

Flutter used Struggle Punch! Miss!
Wiggler used Gas Cannon! A blast came from the thick yellow fog! Spidea lost 22 HP! SPIDEA KOED!

Spidette: 74/100
Spidufo: 20/25
VS.
Flutter: 18/50
Wiggler: 18/50

Spidette used item! Podoboo Ping Pong Ball released! Extra damage on all enemies for 23 HP loss!
SPIDETTE’s TEAM WINNER!

Spidea: That went well.

Drake: You’re cool, dude. Wanna be on my Interview team?

Spidea: Sure!

Drake: Awesome. END TRANSMISSION!

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