Lemmy: This is Ice Land Castle, the coolest Mario 3 castle, the largest Mario 3 castle, and the hardest Mario 3 castle. This was the Pitstop of the fifth Leg around Lemmy’s Land. Teams will spend a mandatory rest period of 12 hours in this castle, whether sleeping in the nice warm bed, eating all the ice cream and yogurt, or getting lost and finding the room with the hungry snowmen. Teams will depart in the order that they arrived.

>> Team Steam <<

Iggy: Okay, the clue says go to the nearest Koopalings ‘R Us and find Lemmy’s favorite object, keep the item, and give it to Lemmy at the Pitstop.

Lemmy: Teams must now hike back to their car and drive to the nearest toy store, Koopalings ‘R Us, there teams will have to find a ball with the clue printed on the back of it. They must keep the ball for the rest of this leg, and hand it to me at the Pitstop.

Roy: Now Iggy, I’ll let you do some work this time, because yesterday, you were just too lazy!

Iggy: Well, you didn’t give me a chance!

Roy: OH GREAT! YOU’RE BACK TO YOUR DISAGREEIN’ SIDE!

Iggy: Well it’s true!

Roy: Fine, you’ll drive this time!

>> Team Cute <<

Birdo: We have to go to the toy store we saw yesterday on the way to the ski resort!

Yoshi: Yoshi tired, we walk…

Birdo: You shouldn’t have eaten that car yesterday… Oh well, maybe the walk will be romantic!

>> Team Cheat <<

Wario: Okay, let’s go to the toy store!

Waluigi: Toys are scary!

Wario: But toys are fun!

Waluigi: Playful had me play with a toy yesterday and a clown popped out of it!

Wario: Clowns don’t pop out of every toy! See, here’s a yo-yo that I stole off of Lemmy! Clowns won’t pop out of it!

Wario spins the yo-yo and a clown suddenly jumps out and bonks Team Cheat in the head.

Wario: I’ll remember next time: don’t steal toys off of Lemmy…

>> Team Steam <<

Iggy: Aww, it opens at 6! Guess we’ll have to camp out!

Roy: Iggy, you go too easy on things, we have to climb up to the top and sneak down!

Iggy: I’m not doing that! Then Lemmy will get mad at me!

Roy: Fine, but you’ll be doing the rest of the challenges today!

>> Team Dream <<

Playful: Okay, we go to the toy store. Great, we have to see kids…

Bagels: I like kids! They always pet me and speak weird stuff to me, and always play with me!

Playful: I hate them! They try to pick me up, and I hate that, so I scratch them, and then they have to screech!

Bagels: Then don’t attack them!

Playful: So how do we drive?

Car: I’m Chitty Chitty Boom Boom, Chitty Chitty Bang Bang’s son!

So Team Dream hops in their magic car and they fly off and start singing…

Team Dream: Yay, Yay, Chitty Chitty Boom Boom, Chitty Chitty Boom Boom, We love you! Hey-

>> Teams Cheat and Cute <<

Wario: Look, there’s the Yoshis!

Birdo: Hello!

Yoshi: When store open?

Wario: It opens at 6!

Birdo: We’ll have to camp out then!

Waluigi: NOOOOOOOO! Camping out is scary! What if a bear eats us like it almost did on Survivor?

Wario drags Waluigi to the alleyway.

Wario: We’re gonna climb up and sneak down!

Waluigi: WHAT IF I FALL?!

Wario throws Waluigi onto the roof.

>> Team Dream <<

Playful: It looks like it’s not open!

Bagels: I love the outdoors! Let’s sleep on the snow-

Playful: No! There is no way I am sleeping in that disgusting stuff! We have to get up there! And fast!

Bagels: Let’s use the fire escape!

Playful: Fine, let’s just go!

>> Teams Cheat and Dream <<

Wario: Okay Waluigi, let’s go in!

Waluigi: I DON’T WANT TO-

Wario slams Waluigi down and Waluigi falls through the roof.

Wario: I can fit through that hole!

Wario jumps down, and screaming is heard.

Waluigi: OWWW!!! NOT PAIN! I’M SCARED OF PAIN! I THINK I’M ALLERGIC TO PAIN, BECAUSE IT HURTS!

Wario sticks a teddy bear in Waluigi’s mouth. A door opens.

Wario: What was that?

Waluigi: MMMMMMMMMMMMMPH! MMMMMMMPH!

Wario: Oops…

Bagels: Wow! Pretty empty!

Playful: Quiet down, you mutt!

Wario runs over to Team Dream.

Wario: I guess you had the same idea as us!

Playful: I guess so…

Bagels: Want to work together?

Playful: NO!

Wario: Sure!

Bagels: He said yes!

Waluigi: HELP!

Wario, Bagels, and Playful run around the corner, and see the ever-so-beloved Care Koopas dancing in the store. One group of the dolls is carrying Waluigi.

Wario: Why do all the weird things happen to him?

Bagels: Playful! Wario! There’s a basket of balls over here!

Wario: Heh, I get it! Basketball!

Playful: You moron! Lemmy’s favorite thing in the world besides his face and snow is a ball! The clue is printed on the back of the ball!

Waluigi picks up a ball with a picture of a clown on it.

Waluigi: AHHHHHHHHH!!!

>> Team Mario <<

Mario: I’m-a the winner!

Luigi: Not yet, Mario! We have to go to Koopalings ‘R Us!

Mario: I-a always wanted to be a Koopaling!

Luigi: That’s the name of the store, Mario!

Mario: How could the store be a Koopaling?

Luigi: Whatever…

>> Teams Cheat Dream - 1st and 2nd at Junction <<

Playful: Star or Circle?

Lemmy: A Junction is a choice between two tasks, each with its own pros and cons. In this Junction, Teams must choose between Star and Circle.

In Star, Teams must look around the store for a Star Key, and once they find it, they must open a box at the cash register, where they will find their next clue. They won’t have to go a long distance, and the task isn’t exhausting, but the keys will be hidden all around the store and it may take a while to find the key. Behind games, under a tile, even a Care Koopa could be holding a key!

In Ball, both team members must purchase a Big Ball and bounce all the way to the school I go to. The map will be given to them, and the school will be easy to find. However, Teams will find the school to be far away, and the task could turn exhausting.

Bagels: Well, we can’t purchase anything yet, so we have to do Star!

Waluigi: HELP!

Waluigi is once again, around the corner, with the Care Koopas, who squished him into a ball and are playing basketball with him.

Wario: Here we go again…

Wario charges at the crowd and all the stuffed Koopas run away, dropping three keys.

Bagels: HEY! That’s one more then we need!

Playful: Let’s give it to Yoshi. He could help us out if there is an eating challenge; he’d eat all the plates for us!

Bagels: Good idea!

>> Team Mario <<

Luigi: Okay Mario, we’ll sleep here for tonight!

Mario: Before Mom left us to help the poor people in Africa-

Luigi: Actually, she abandoned us so she could go to Vegas!

Mario: Same difference! Well, before she left us, she told me that I was special in my own way!

Luigi: Yes, you’re special in ways others would NEVER want to be…

>> Team Scheme <<

Larry: We’re in second to last, so when we see the Magic Lamp clue, we are definitely using it!

Lemmy: The Magic Lamps are items found in each Leg. The Team who gets them can skip all the remaining tasks in the Leg. However, Teams can only use one Lamp in the race. In this Magic Lamp Quest, Teams will have to buy ten items at the Koopalings ‘R Us store. The team will still have to do one thing all the others must do, bring me a ball!

Ludwig: We have to go to the toy store. The clue says we must purchase ten things to get Magic Lamp!

Larry: The place where I get my spy gear and tennis rackets! Yay!

Ludwig: Let’s go!

>> Teams Dream and Cheat - 1st and 2nd at Route Marker <<

Wario: Waluigi! Come here with me! We have to open the box!

Waluigi: WHAT IF A CLOWN JUMPS OUT OF THE BOX?

Playful: He’s STILL crying about that?

Wario: Yup…

Playful and Bagels opens both boxes, and find a Route Marker.

Playful: Take a train to the section where anybody can make a submission of any game! Find the Route Marker in front of the local Ballbuster store, where many Lemmy’s Land natives rent games!

Bagels: That would be Lemmy’s Reviews!

Lemmy: Teams must now ride their car to the train station and ride it to Lemmy’s Reviews, where they must take a taxi to Plit’s type of Blockbuster’s, Ballbusters, where they will find their next clue.

Wario opens the box.

Wario: See! There’s nothing in there!

Waluigi looks closer and a Care Koopa jumps up and starts choking him.

Waluigi: AAH-

Wario pulls the doll off and throws it across the store.

Wario: Let’s just go…

>> Team Scheme <<

Larry: We’ll have to wait here to get the Magic Lamp!

Ludwig: Aw well… At least we’ll get sleep here, and NOT get our faces frozen in snowballs!

>> Team What <<

The King: I miss Amanda…

Daisy: All we can do is hope that something bad happens to the other teams, or that there is a hold up somewhere…

>> Teams Cheat, Dream, and Cute <<

Wario pulls Yoshi by his tail.

Wario: Yoshi, I got a clue for you. I also brought you this ball we’re supposed to bring.

Yoshi: Ooh! Yoshi thank! Yoshi need car to train station!

Bagels: We’ll drive you, Yoshi!

Yoshi: Yoshi thank again!

The two cars drive off.

Teams Cheat, Cute, and Dream: What about us?

>> Team What <<

Daisy: I guess we’ll camp out here too…

The King: I’m-a Mario!

Daisy: What are you doing?

The King: It’s-a me!

Daisy: Huh?

The King: Cheese!

Daisy: Looks like Mario has his first and only fan…

The King: Owowowowow!

Daisy: And guess who’s stuck with him…

>> Teams Cheat, Dream, and Cute <<

Wario: NO!

Bagels: No!

Waluigi: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Playful: You don’t even know what you’re screaming about, do you?

Waluigi: I’m just trying to fit in…

Yoshi: What happen?

Birdo: The sign says there’s no train until 7:30!

Playful: All the teams will catch up to us!

Yoshi: Oh… WAIT! YOSHI FEEL BETTER!

Wario: Huh?

Yoshi: Remember, we stop at Dunkin Donuts on way?

Birdo: Yeah…

Yoshi: Yoshi turn to choo-choo!

Yoshi blows a bubble, eats it, and turns into a train.

Bagels: YES!

Playful: But there’s only one problem!

Wario: What?

Birdo: Only four people can sit in the train…

…

Waluigi: Why’s everyone looking at me?

A minute later…

Waluigi: AHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!

Playful: Wow! The yo-yo string Wario got us was enough to hold Waluigi!

>> Teams Steam, Mario, Scheme, and What <<

The doors to the store open and all the teams rush in.

Daisy: I would’ve done the Magic Lamp Quest, but seeing how Larry is going for it, his team will beat my slow dad and I…

The King: I’m not slow, honey! I can run a mile!

Daisy: Yeah, in three hours!

Larry: Okay, Ludwig, you buy five things and I’ll buy five things!

Ludwig runs off to the jeenyis section-

Ludwig: Hey! Are you calling me un-smart?

No, just stupid…

Ludwig: …

The genius section, and Larry runs off to find spy gear. All the other teams run around the corner, except Mario, who’s playing a video game where Bowser beats up Mario.

In the game…

Bowser: See ya later, Mario!

Mario: OWOWOWOWOWOW!

Out of the game…

Mario: HAHA! This is so fun! Beating up that red man!

>> Teams Cute, Dream, and Cheat - 1st, 2nd, and 3rd at Whomp Stop <<

Birdo: Who has strong legs and isn’t afraid of heights?

Lemmy: A Whomp Stop is a task that one person must perform to get their next clue. However, in this Whomp Stop, the team member will meet their other team member directly at the Pitstop. In this Whomp Stop, the chosen team member must take their ball and ride a bike to the city of a famous party series. Once there, that person will have to climb up the tallest tower. Once at the top, they must spot the nearby Pitstop, right next to Mushroom Bridge. They will ride their bikes there, grab the ball, and give it to me!

Yoshi: That Yoshi!

Wario: Hmm, I guess I’ll do it…

Playful: YOU, BAGELS! I hate running…

Bagels: But it’s a bike!

Playful: I hate bikes too!

Bagels: But you never rode one-

Playful: In my dreams, I did, and I hated it.

Bagels: Whatever…

>> Teams Mario and Steam - 4th and 5th at Junction <<

Luigi: Mario would slow us down by bouncing in the wrong direction, so we’ll look for the star…

Iggy: They could find the star first, so we’ll bounce!

Roy: Whatever you say, just don’t blame me if we get eliminated!

Iggy: We’ll come in first again!

>> Teams Cute, Dream, and Cheat <<

Birdo and Playful jump in a tiny clown car and zoom off. However, Waluigi has a little trouble.

Driver: What’s the problem?

Waluigi: I’M CLAUSTROPHOBIC!

The driver hits a button and the clown car grows larger.

Waluigi: What if it’s too big and we crash when we try to turn?!

The driver stuffs Waluigi in!

Waluigi: AHHHHHHHHHHH!

Driver: Here, open the chest and some entertainment will cheer you up!

Waluigi: A GameCube in a TV, maybe! I just hope it isn’t Resident Evil 4! That game’s WAY TOO SCARY!

Driver: Aren’t you the guy who thinks Kirby is scary?

Waluigi: WHAT IF HE CAME AND ATE ME?!

Driver: Then life would be perfect!

Waluigi opens the suitcase, and as predicted, a clown jumps out and blows raspberries.

Waluigi: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

The final car drives off, and Wario, Bagels, and Yoshi are ready.

Paratroopa: GO!

They all rush off, with Yoshi and Bagels in the lead, and Wario making the gap bigger.

>> Team What - 6th at Junction <<

Daisy: We’ll do Circle, Dad will have fun with that…

The King: Really, I say we do Octagon!

Daisy: There’s no octagon!

The King: WHY WOULD YOU EVEN CARE ABOUT AN OCTAGON AT THIS MOMENT?

Daisy: Here we come, elimination!

>> Team Scheme <<

Larry: Okay, I got some spy gear! What did you get?

Ludwig: I got some books!

Larry: Let’s go pay for them!

>> Team Mario <<

Luigi: Mario! Look! The key!

Mario: Mario! Look! The key!

Luigi: In the Mario Power Tennis case!

Mario: In the Mario Power Tennis case!

Luigi: Stop it!

Mario: !ti potS

>> Team Steam - Junction Completed <<

Roy: We wasted money, but we’re at the next clue!

Iggy: Take a train to where anyone can post a submission, as long as they played a game! That’s the Reviews! We must go to the Ballbusters there!

>> Yoshi, Bagels, and Wario <<

Yoshi just barely makes it to Awful Tower first, and gets to a cloud to bring him up there. Bagels decides not to wait for the cloud and to just climb up the 500 stairs. Yoshi makes it up, and the cloud drops down in time for Wario to use it.

Yoshi: Yoshi see big Lemmy Flag on Mushroom Bridge! May be Pit top! Yoshi jump down!

Yoshi just jumps down, but flutters near the ground.

Wario: Ah, Mushroom Bridge! I see the three clown cars too! How’d they get Waluigi in there?

Bagels opens the top door.

Bagels: Wario? Already? Oh, I see where to go! I’d better hurry!

Bagels runs back down the stairs.

Wario: I can’t jump down there! I’ll have to go down the stairs… *sigh*

Wario starts to walk down, but then trips, rolls over Bagels-

Bagels: OW!

-and rolls down to the exit!

Wario: YES!

Wario jumps on his bike, and Bagels finally gets down the stairs. All three teams are biking to the Pitstop.

>> Teams Mario and What - Junction Completed <<

Luigi: Thanks! Okay… Take a train to the Ballbusters in… Lemmy’s Reviews!

Mario: Let’s Do Reggae!

At the school…

The King: WHEE!!! I’m a sugarcoated hotdog with maple syrup!

Daisy: I never thought something could feel that way… Take the train to- Lemmy’s Review’s Ballbusters!

>> Team Scheme - Magic Lamp Quest Completed <<

Larry: Gracias! Okay, so Ludwig, we have our ten items, did we need anything else?

Ludwig: No, let’s just hurry! We could still be eliminated!

GEH! GEH! GEH!

>> Teams Steam, Mario, and What <<

Iggy: Quickest train to Lemmy’s Reviews!

Shy Guy: Go ahead!

Mario: Same flight, please!

Shy Guy: Okay, just keep moving!

Daisy: Please let us on!

Shy Guy: NO!

Daisy: WHY NOT?

Shy Guy: I was just kidding! Go ahead!

>> Team Scheme <<

POOF!

Playful and Birdo: Aww…

Waluigi: AHHHH!!!

Larry: YAY! Hi Lemmy!

Ludwig: So glad to see you!

Toadette: HI!

Larry: But not you!

Toadette: Why doesn’t anyone like me…?

Lemmy: Team Scheme, you’re Team number one-

Ludwig: YAY!

Lemmy: However, you didn’t hand me the ball yet!

Ludwig: Vhat ball?

Larry: NO! We still had to get the ball from the store!

Ludwig: This is all your-

Larry: Well I asked if we had everything!

Toadette: Umm, the closest Koopalings ‘R Us is 15 minutes away next to the Mario Tennis Stadium!

Ludwig: We still have hope!

Larry: TAXI!

Screech!

Ludwig: Mario Tennis, please!

ZOOM!

Lemmy: But there’s a store right under the bridge!

Toadette: Teaches them for not liking me! -_-

>> Team Cute <<

Birdo: YAY YOSHI!

Yoshi: YOSHI!

Toadette: Hi foolish dinos!

Yoshi: Yoshi never know Toadette gothic!

Lemmy: Where’s your ball?

Yoshi spits the ball out of his mouth.

Yoshi: Yoshi forgot, and thought it was big jawbreaker!

Lemmy: Eww… Oh well!

Lemmy rubs it in Toadette’s hair to dry it off, and Toadette bites Lemmy’s hand.

Lemmy: Great, I may have rabies now… Ah well! You’re Team number 1!

Lemmy: As winners of this leg of the AWESOME race, you will get poisonous toast!

Yoshi eats it anyway.

>> Teams Steam, Mario, and What - 4th, 5th and 6th at Whomp Stop <<

Roy: Whomp Stop! Iggy’s doing it!

Iggy: FINALLY!

Mario: HOLA!

Luigi: I’ll do it!

Mario: TU FEO!

Luigi: HEY!

Daisy: Dad doesn’t even know what he’s doing now!

The King: Amazee Dayzee, throw your petals down!

Dry Bones: Derek! Don’t listen to him! That’s what we call a MENTAL man!

Daisy: So true…

Mario and The King are somehow in the cars, and Roy’s car already drove off.

Paratroopa: GO!

Iggy and Luigi rush off, while Daisy tries to read the map.

Daisy: Sure enough, my dad had to scribble all over it!

>> Teams Dream and Cheat <<

Lemmy is holding Waluigi on the mat, as Wario is jogging to the Pitstop. Bagels is running, and almost passes him, but of course, Wario trips him.

Playful: HEY! That’s cheating!

Lemmy: Duh!

Toadette: Hi stupid mortals!

Waluigi: SHE’S SCARING ME!

Wario: Here’s the ball!

Lemmy: Team Cheat, you’re Team number two!

Wario: Great, now where’s the Spinies, where’s the spring? I don’t see any traffic!

Toadette charges and pushes Team Cheat off the bridge.

Wario: AHH! I’M TOO FAT TO DIE!

Waluigi: I’M TOO AFRAID TO-

Wario: ACTUALLY, EVERYONE WANTS YOU TO DIE!

Waluigi: AHHHHHHHHH!!!

Bagels: Wow…

Playful: Hurry, you mutt!

Toadette: Now that’s the tone!

Playful: Thank-

Toadette: SHUDDAP!

Playful: (No wonder everyone hates you.) Here’s the ball.

Lemmy: Thanks! You’re Team number three!

Bagels: We’re STILL up there!

Playful: You mean it surprised you? Now let’s hurry before she pushes ME into the water!

>> Team Scheme <<

Driver: You know there was a Koopalings ‘R Us under the bridge!

Larry: WHAT?

Ludwig: Oh great…

Larry: Aw well, we’ll just get the ball and come back out.

>> Luigi, Iggy, and Daisy <<

Iggy: Luigi! If we work together, I’ll let you go to the Pitstop before us any time!

Luigi: Okay! (Idiot!)

Iggy and Luigi jump on the cloud and rise up. Daisy’s luck is just like Bagels’s.

Mario: MMMMMMMM! Bagels with cream CHEESE!

Daisy: Why’d they remove the blocks? Guess I’ll have to use the stairs!

Luigi: It’s hard to miss, on the bridge.

Iggy: It’s my face without glasses!

Luigi: No, it’s Lemmy’s face!

Iggy: I’m still not the most famous…

Luigi and Iggy run down the stairs. Meanwhile, Daisy is on the roof.

Daisy: I have an idea that might just work to get there!

Daisy runs back down, gets her bike, and rides to the cloud.

>> Team Scheme <<

Ludwig: Okay! Let’s go!

Larry: Please let us not get eliminated!

>> Teams Mario and Steam <<

Roy: Come on, Iggy! You can beat him!

Iggy: I told Luigi if I could work with him, that they would always get to the Pitstop before us!

Roy: You’re STILL a moron!

Roy takes Iggy to the corner to talk to him.

Luigi: Here’s the ball!

Lemmy: You are Team number 4!

Mario: Toadette!

Toadette: Mario, wanna see the newest hammer?

Mario: Sure!

Luigi: Don’t! She’s the most gothic of all the Toads!

Toadette: May gargoyles tackle you someday. Anyways, it’s the Super Duper Smashing Hammer!

Mario: How much damage does it do?

Toadette hammers Mario:

Mario: I see…

Mario falls down.

Lemmy: Join us Koopas to destroy Mario!

Toadette: I do it for fun…

Roy: Got it?

Iggy: Sorry, Roy…

Lemmy: You are Team number 5!

Roy: You’re lucky this time!

Iggy: Yup…

Lemmy: One more team makes it, but I get two more balls! This is the best Leg ever! The King, we may be here a while, so go play with Toadette.

The King: Why?

Lemmy: She’s pink!

The King: PINK!

The King chases Toadette.

Toadette: WHEN YOU DIE SOMEDAY, ALL WILL CHEER!

>> Daisy <<

Daisy: We needed to use the parachute Dad bought for SOMETHING! WHEE!

>> Pitstop <<

A few minutes later…

A car comes in and Larry and Ludwig walk steadily out

Toadette: NO! HISS!

Toadette turns around.

Toadette: YES! YES! YESSSSSS!

Toadette grabs The King and puts him on the mat as Daisy and her parachuting bicycle land on the mat. Team Scheme sprints but it’s not enough.

Toadette: Yes! Daisy is still in!

Lemmy: Team What, you’re team number 6!

Daisy: YAY! We’re still in!

The King: I can’t wait for Global Warming!

Daisy: I’m so happy that I won’t even question that!

Larry: Ludwig, you said we had EVERYTHING!

Ludwig: I guess I don’t work well under a lot of pressure.

Lemmy: TeamScheme,youarethelastteamtoarrive,
andyouhavebeeneliminatedfromtheAWESOMErace.

Larry: Why are you talking so fast?

Lemmy: I can’t wait to play with all the balls I got!

Ludwig: …

Larry: I want one of three teams, Iggy and Roy, the pets, or the Warios to win.

Ludwig: Same here…

Stay tuned for scenes from the next episode!

On the Next Amazing Race, Something Happens!
 

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