Go see the original story.

***

“Come on, Iggy,” prodded Lemmy. “It’ll be fun! Well, maybe.”

“Uh oh,” repeated Iggy, not reassured in the least. He made a mad dash for the door, but Lemmy grabbed him by the shell before he had time to get far.

“Everything will be fine,” Lemmy comforted him, still holding a firm grip on his shell.

“F-five days!” Iggy exclaimed, looking down at his waist. “How on Plit will I ever-”

“Just leave everything to me.”

And so began the roughest five days of Iggy’s life.

***

Although Lemmy did have to do some additional convincing, Iggy finally agreed that Bowser would probably pummel them both if they weren’t able to pull off their act for his birthday. Maybe not literally, but some method of punishment would most likely take place, and neither of them wanted to find out what it would be. Bowser was not known for his sympathy.

Lemmy left the room briefly and returned carrying a scale.

“What’s that for?” asked Iggy, not really wanting to hear the obvious answer.

“Well, it’s for weighing things,” explained Lemmy. And then, as an afterthought, “Duh.”

“Well, that makes sense,” Iggy remarked.

“Before we do anything,” Lemmy continued, “we need to find out how much weight you’ve gained.”

Placing the scale on the floor, he motioned for his brother to step on. The meter spun for a ways before halting to a stop at the number 211. As Iggy told Lemmy how much he had previously weighed, Lemmy had to hold his jaw in place to prevent it from hitting the floor.

“One hundred and thirty pounds?” Lemmy exclaimed. “You gained eighty-one pounds in just two months?!”

“Well, you don’t have to advertise it,” said Iggy crossly.

“We have our work cut out for us,” Lemmy sighed. “But, never mind that, I’m sure we can do it.” He thought for a moment. “Well, it’ll take me a while to get everything set up. Your training starts tomorrow, ok?”

Iggy groaned, but agreed anyway. He left the room, grateful for his brother’s support. Still, he couldn’t help but wonder at just what it was Lemmy was planning.

Later that evening, all of the Koopas were gathered around the table for dinner. Such an event was rare because they were usually busy, but Clawdia had insisted that they needed a little more "family time". Laid out before them was a spread of almost every imaginable food.

“Eat up, Iggy,” said Clawdia, placing a hamburger on Iggy’s plate. “Do you want anything on that?”

“Um, maybe some salt,” he answered.

Iggy was about to bite down on the hamburger he was holding, when it was suddenly whipped out of his hands so quickly he accidentally gave the air a chomp before he realized it was gone. Before he had time to complain he noticed Lemmy, who he hadn’t noticed before and was sitting right beside him, hamburger in hand.

“And just what do you think you’re doing?” Lemmy enquired.

“Trying to eat my supper!” snapped Iggy. What was Lemmy trying to pull? “Give that back!”

“No can do,” Lemmy looked at the hamburger with disdain, and tossed it on to the floor for Bagels to eat. “As part of the training, you may eat only healthy food.”

“But I thought you said training started tomorrow!”

“I did, but the dietary part of the program starts today, as of right now,” Lemmy said matter-of-factly, and began to pile up Iggy’s plate with an assortment of vegetables and salad.

Iggy sighed. He had never been a big fan of salad, though he discovered after some experimentation that it wasn’t so bad after all. None of the other Koopalings seemed to notice Iggy’s sudden interest in healthy food, though at one point in the meal he received a look of approval from Larry.

Iggy didn’t see Lemmy for the rest of that evening. In fact, he didn’t see him at all for the rest of the night. Iggy assumed he must have been working on that training program he’d said would take place tomorrow. He tried to ignore it, but his curiosity simply would not allow him to dismiss the subject. That night he lay awake in bed for a while thinking about it, but ended up drifting off anyhow.

The next morning, Iggy was abruptly awoken to a blazing white light. Shivering, he groped for his covers, only to discover that it seemed to have vanished. Confused, he decided that the best course of action would be to open his eyes. After blinking for a moment in the bright light, his eyes eventually adjusted enough to make out the blur that was:

“Lemmy?” he asked groggily, still half asleep. “What are you doing?”

“Time to get up, sleepy head!” announced Lemmy, with a cheery demeanour that seemed very out of place for that early in the morning. He was holding Iggy’s blanket. “It’s time for your weight-loss training!”

“Huh? W-what time is it?” Iggy rubbed his eyes and yawned as he slowly sat up.

“5:30 AM,” answered Lemmy.

“What?” Iggy exclaimed, stopping in mid-yawn. He reached for his blanket. “Give me that. Wake me again when it’s not too early to think.”

“Come on,” Lemmy prodded. “You’re awake now anyhow.”

Now thoroughly awake, Iggy gaped at his brother. “This early? You’ve got to be kidding me.”

Lemmy shook his head no, and lead Iggy to the gymnasium. When they stepped inside, Iggy gasped.

“You… don’t mean…”

“I sure do!” said Lemmy. “I pulled a few favors, and enlisted the help of a few of my site’s tourists. They all want to help. Each one of them will have some sort of test that they think will help you lose weight.”

Iggy looked around the gym, seeming to expect more than the one person standing there.

“I thought you said a few tourists were going to help. I only see one.”

“The others aren’t here right now, but you’ll see them later. After you complete one tourist’s test, you’ll meet the next one.”

“What about you? I thought you were going to help too!”

“Of course,” Lemmy answered with a grin. “At the end of every day, I’ll have a special test to see how you’ve improved. You’ll find out what that is later.”

“What’s with all the mystery?” demanded Iggy. “Why can’t I know which tourists are gonna help? How many are there? Why won’t you tell me what your test is?”

“If I told you everything, all the fun would go out of it,” answered Lemmy. He turned to face the first tourist, who had been standing there listening to them talk the whole time. This tourist was largely cat-like in shape, with large ears and dark blue fur.

“This is Mewd,” said Lemmy. “Mewd, this is Iggy.”

“I know that already!” they both said instantly. Lemmy chuckled.

“I’ll see you later,” he promised, and proceeded to roll on out of the gym.

For a minute or so, Iggy didn’t know what to think, let alone say. The two stared at each other for a moment before Mewd broke the silence.

“All right, Lemmy tells me you need a little... help,” Mewd stated. He waited expectantly.

“Uh, yeah,” muttered Iggy. “So, can you help?”

“I think so,” Mewd answered. “But it’s not going to be easy.”

“So I’ve heard,” sighed Iggy.

Mewd led Iggy outside. It was too dark to see much yet, as it was still very early. Although Iggy seemed to have trouble finding his way in the darkness, Mewd was indifferent and helped Iggy along.

After a few minutes of walking, Mewd stopped suddenly, but Iggy didn’t. He couldn’t see much at all, let alone notice that his guide had just stopped.

“Wait! Don’t go any farther!” called Mewd, but too late.

Iggy never saw the lake in front of him, and stumbled right into it with a splash. He spat out cold water as he fumbled for the water's edge. Feeling something solid, he pulled himself back onto dry land, coughing and sputtering. Mewd rushed over to help.

“Sorry about that,” he said apologetically. “I keep forgetting that Koopas can’t see so well in the dark.”

“Oh,” shivered Iggy. He tried to shake the water off and began to wring out his hair. “Was that your test thingy? Can I go back to bed now?”

“No,” Mewd laughed. “It’s over this way.”

Iggy was more confused than ever. He couldn’t recognize anything in the darkness. After a few more minutes of walking, a faint light could be seen in the darkness.

“We’re almost there,” said Mewd.

The light kept getting brighter as they kept walking. As the light became closer, so did something else. Iggy couldn’t tell what it was, but it was big and rectangular. Soon enough, they were there. Wherever "there" happened to be.

“Is this… a tennis court?” Iggy wondered out loud. “You dragged me all the way out here to play tennis?”

“You bet,” replied Mewd as he uncovered some racquets and a tennis ball from the supplies shed. “As soon as you can beat me, you’ve completed my part of Lemmy’s little program.”

“How’s playing tennis going to help me lose weight?”

“You’d be surprised.”

Iggy was soon to discover that Mewd played a mean game of tennis. An inexperienced player, he was not only sweating excessively but seemed to miss the ball more times than not. The hours dragged on, with no success at all on Iggy’s part. After a while, his muscles hurt and his limbs ached. He gasped for breath as he ran from one end of the court to the other, desperate to finally win.

Slowly but surely, Iggy was getting better. Too slowly for him to really notice, but he was getting the hang of it.

Daybreak passed, but Iggy hardly noticed. 26 games and many hours later, Mewd decided that it was time for lunch. As they ate, Iggy wiped the sweat off his brow. They had been playing for hours on end, but Iggy still couldn’t seem to win. They resumed their game again after lunch.

Hours later, Iggy still had not won. He had lost track of all time, and didn’t even notice when the sky began to darken. Soon, some lights had to be turned on for the game to be able to continue. He was tired and hungry, but he focused solely on one thing: he would win against Mewd if it was the last thing he did.

After yet another defeat, Mewd tossed the ball in the air and caught it again. “What say we call it a night, and start again tomorrow?” he offered.

“No way,” said Iggy. “One more round.”

“You ready to lose again?”

“Bring it on!”

As yet another round commenced, Iggy was as determined as ever. Even Mewd found it hard to score a point. He seemed impressed at how quickly Iggy had picked up on the game, even if it had taken all day.

Finally, the game was coming to an end. The next point would win the game. Every muscle in Iggy’s body tensed as he waited for Mewd’s serve. He would not lose this time.

The ball bounced around the court for a good five minutes. Every move made seemed as natural as if it were pre-programmed into them, and Iggy had learned much by watching how Mewd played. He could predict every move he made, as could Mewd. Driven purely by adrenaline, Iggy returned serve after serve, never missing a beat.

Finally, Iggy noticed an opening to Mewd’s left. When the ball bounced back to him, he smacked it with all his might into the opening, catching Mewd off-guard and winning Iggy the game!

“Well, I must say you’ve improved,” Mewd smirked. “It took all day, but you did beat me. You’ve passed my part of the weight-loss program.”

Though Iggy knew he should feel happy, all he felt was tired. Every muscle in his body seemed to ache. He managed a small smile as he began to walk back to the castle. Suddenly, he remembered something he’d been meaning to ask since morning. He turned back around to face Mewd.

“Mewd?”

“Yes?”

“Since when do you even play tennis?”

Mewd laughed. “What can I say? I have lots of spare time,” he chuckled.

***

Back at the castle, Iggy was about to crawl into bed when there was a sudden knock at the door.

“Who is it?” he asked sleepily, ready to collapse on the bed.

“It’s Lemmy!”

“Ugh,” Iggy groaned. “Come in.”

Iggy’s door opened and Lemmy strolled in with a grin on his face.

“Mewd tells me you passed his part,” he said.

“Yeah,” sighed Iggy. “I didn’t even know that Mewd played tennis.”

“Neither did I,” Lemmy admitted. “So, are you ready to see how you’ve improved?”

“Huh?” Iggy asked, suddenly wide awake.

“It’s my test,” Lemmy explained. “Come with me to the gym.”

“What’s with all of the tests?” inquired Iggy, following him anyways. “What happens if I don’t pass them?”

“Well, the test is just what the tourist thinks will help you lose weight, as I’ve already told you. If you don’t pass, you keep trying until you do. Simple as that,” clarified Lemmy. “They’re only called tests because I thought "experimental ordeals" sounded too painful.”

“Oh,” stated Iggy.

Lemmy lead Iggy into the gym, where the acrobatic equipment was set up.

“I’ve been practicing all day, but this is a two-Koopa routine,” explained Lemmy. “I couldn’t get very far. Do you remember how our routine went?”

“Yeah,” Iggy responded.

The two Koopalings took their positions on the platform, just as they always had before Iggy’s accident.

“One…” began Lemmy.

“Two…” Iggy nervously continued.

“Three!” they yelled as they jumped towards the swings.

Lemmy reached his swing with practised ease, while Iggy only just barely managed to grab hold of his. Still, it was farther than they had come before. Somewhat reassured, Iggy immediately swung his weight upwards, intending to meet Lemmy in the middle. Lemmy did the same, but Iggy didn’t come quite close enough. They flailed in the air for a moment before tumbling down onto the net. Iggy looked disappointed.

“Well, we got further this time,” said Lemmy, in an attempt to cheer him up. “I’m sure you’ll be fit as a fiddle again by the time we have to perform for King Dad’s party!” To his surprise, Iggy started giggling. “What’s so funny?”

“Fit as a fiddle!” Iggy gasped through his laughter. “That sounds funny!”

Lemmy smiled, happy to have brightened him up a little. But still, he wondered what would happen if he was wrong. What if they weren’t able to pull it off? He pushed the thought from his mind. They were going to do it. They had to.

***

The day had finally come. Morton, Wendy, Ludwig, and Roy were all there, waiting for the show to start. Bowser was there as well.

As Iggy positioned himself at the starting point, he took a deep breath. This was it. All of the weight-loss training of the last five days had all boiled down to this.

As the lights dimmed, Iggy could see Lemmy from across the stage. He was at his own starting point. Iggy tried to catch his eye, to give him the thumbs up, but Lemmy seemed as if he was in another world altogether. He seemed anxious. Worried. Tense. Iggy tried to tell himself that Lemmy just had stage fright, but he couldn’t quite bring himself to believe it. Lemmy had been doing stunts and performances like this for a long time now. There was no reason for him to be nervous.

Iggy looked down, expecting to see the net below. Instead, he gasped. He couldn’t see the floor. His enormous gut blocked the view.

“One…” began the all-too familiar countdown.

“Two…” he continued, suddenly feeling faint.

“Three!” they both yelled.

Iggy jumped, but the swing was suddenly miles away. He reached as far as he could but to no avail. He fell. Down, down, forever falling. He caught glimpses of Lemmy, who had been unable to complete his next jump because of him, falling also. Bowser’s disappointed face, along with the other Koopalings pointing, laughing.

Where was the net? It should have been there, waiting to catch them should they happen to fall. But as he looked he looked down, all he saw was the floor. It was coming, and they were both going to hit.

“Noooooo!” he screamed, suddenly sitting up. Sitting up?

He looked around, breathing hard. He was still in bed. Everything was still the way it should be. The sweat-soaked covers felt clammy. It was all a dream, just a horrible nightmare. He tried to calm himself, repeating this in his head a few times before settling back in to bed. Tomorrow would be better, he told himself. Tomorrow would be better.

***

The next morning, Iggy winced as Lemmy flicked his bedroom light on.

“Ouch,” he moaned. “Warn me next time!”

“Sorry about that,” Lemmy apologized. He smiled as he rolled over to Iggy. “You ready for today’s tourist?”

“Um, no?”

“Of course you are,” Lemmy assured him, pretending he hadn’t heard. “Let’s go.”

This time, Lemmy lead Iggy to the Koopas’ indoor pool. This room (which was incidentally very large) contained two big pools, complete with a diving board at the end of the first. It was in a small building attached to the side of the Koopas’ main castle.

Looking around, Iggy spotted something swimming around in the water. Noticing them, the creature swam over to the side of the pool. With a kick of its back fin, it propelled itself out of the water, landing a few feet away from the "twins". Iggy stared sceptically.

“A fish?” he asked dubiously. “You are getting a fish to help me lose weight?!”

“Ah, ah, ah,” said Lemmy quickly. “Not just any fish. This is Lil Cheep Cheep.”

“Hiya!” grinned Lil Cheep Cheep.

“Looks like a normal fish to me,” repeated Iggy.

“No, stupid!” said Lemmy, nearly falling off of his ball. “He’s a Cheep Cheep. You know, one of our minions?”

“Oh, yeah,” Iggy yawned. “It’s too early for this kind of thing.”

Lemmy smacked his head. “Good grief,” he sighed. “Well, I’m outta here. You two have fun!” And with that, he rolled on out of the room.

“So, you’re Lil Cheep Cheep,” stated Iggy.

“Sure am! I’m sure you’ve heard all about me?”

“No.”

“Just kidding! Anyways, today, you will be swimming!”

“Really?” gasped Iggy in mock astonishment. “You mean, we’re at the pool to swim? Never would I ever have thought-”

“Oh, shut up,” said Lil Cheep Cheep good-naturedly. He flopped over to the pool’s edge and dived in. Resurfacing, he motioned with his fin for Iggy to come in as well.

“Here goes nothing,” Iggy shrugged, jumping in. The water was just right: not too warm, not too cold. Definitely an improvement over the lake he’d fallen into the previous day, he thought to himself. He splashed around a bit, getting used to the water. He was starting to enjoy himself, when Lil Cheep Cheep called for him to come over. Iggy did so, treading water to keep himself afloat.

The first part of the day was spent doing aquatic-aerobic exercises. Every half an hour or so, Iggy would take a short break from swimming to regain lost energy, but after a snack (or a washroom break) it was back into the pool. Though it wasn’t so bad at first, Iggy found himself in need of breaks more often as the day progressed. Lil Cheep Cheep may have been perfectly comfortable swimming for hours on end, but Iggy just wasn’t cut out for that kind of exertion.

“Now it’s time for swimming techniques. Backstrokes!” commanded Lil Cheep Cheep.

And so the day continued. Lil Cheep Cheep never seemed to run out of ideas, and Iggy stubbornly refused to give in to the growing fatigue. He let his mind wander, taking his mind off of the weariness. This seemed to work. After six hours of the same routine, however, Iggy finally just couldn’t continue.

In the middle of a timed lap, he was surprised to find himself staring downward instead of at the surface of the water. Snapping out of his daydream, he tried to make for the pool’s edge, but every stroke suddenly felt like his arms weighed a ton. He weakly floundered about as best he could, but his inward panic was rising. He was sinking, and there was absolutely nothing he could do about it. He slowly drifted to the bottom of the pool.

Luckily, little Cheep Cheep noticed Iggy’s sudden disappearance. Spotting Iggy near the bottom, he swam over and pulled him to the surface. Shoving the heavy Koopa onto the deck, he then flopped himself up.

“Are you all right?” asked Lil Cheep Cheep worriedly.

“I think so,” Iggy sputtered, spitting out some water. He gave a weak smile. “What say we stay in the shallow end for a while, hmm?”

Though he had moved back in to the deep end, by the end of the day Iggy was more comfortable in the water than he’d ever been in his life. He had managed to hold his breath for just under two minutes, been able to finish five laps in four minutes, and even beaten Lil Cheep Cheep at water volleyball, among other things too numerous to name. It was well in to the night when Lil Cheep Cheep finally told Iggy he had passed.

“Yup, I can’t think of anything else for you to do!” smiled the Cheep Cheep. “You did pretty good, for a Koopa.”

“Thanks, I think,” said Iggy, grateful that the day was finally coming to a close. But it wasn’t over, not just yet.

It was very late when Iggy trudged back in to his bedroom. He hadn’t been able to complete the act, but he’d come closer. It wasn’t that he didn’t remember how to do it; he had it memorized. But the extra pounds he’d gained in the past months slowed him down and weighed him down impossibly. He sighed, something he’d been doing a lot of the past few days. More determined than ever to lose the extra weight, he crawled into bed and fell asleep instantly.

The next morning, Iggy got up earlier than usual and met Lemmy as he was rolling down the hallway.

“Well, well, well,” Lemmy chuckled. “And I didn’t even have to wake you. Golden Road is waiting for you in the gym. I think maybe he has a sore throat. He sounded kinda funny over the phone, but he said he was feeling well enough to help out anyways. I imagine you remember the way to the gym?”

“Duh.”

“Good, then I won’t have to take you there,” said Lemmy. He went on his way, calling, “See you tonight!” as he left.

Upon entering the gym, Iggy was promptly greeted by… an empty room.

“Where’s Golden Road?” he wondered aloud.

“I’m right here, you idiot!” said a voice. The voice accented.

“Huh? Where?” he asked, confused. “I don’t see anybody…”

“Augh! Down here!”

Iggy slowly lowered his gaze to find a Goomba, ordinary in every way, except for one noticeable difference: it was gray..

“You!” he yelled, recognizing the Goomba as Mr. Little, the notorious Goomba who had nearly succeeded in doing away with his cousins, Nick and Susan. This by itself wouldn’t have been so bad, except that he and his other siblings were also captured. “Where’s Golden Road? Go away, I’m really not in the mood for you now.”

“Golden Road couldn’t make it, alright?!” yelled Mr. Little, annoyed that Iggy hadn’t been frightened in the least. “But now, I shall finally have my revenge! Using you as a hostage, I will single-handedly take over the Koopa Kingdom and kill your entire family! Mwahahaha!”

As he spoke, Iggy lifted a foot to stomp on the pesky annoyance, but Mr. Little was too quick. Noticing the huge foot at the last possible second, he slipped out of the way just in time.

“Drat,” cursed Iggy.

“You didn’t think I was that stupid, did you?” chortled Mr Little.

“Uh, yes,” answered Iggy, obviously unimpressed. Mr. Little drooped noticeably, but straightened himself again with a smirk.

“You laugh now, but-”

“No I don’t,” interjected Iggy with a yawn.

“Shut up and let me continue my dramatic speech!” screamed the little gray Goomba. Iggy shut up. “As I was saying, you laugh now, but will soon cower in terror!” Iggy rolled his eyes, but Mr. Little continued. “You will cower in terror once you see that I have… Flying Bloobers!”

***

Iggy seemed less sure of himself now. He looked around cautiously. To his relief, there wasn’t a Bloober in sight. “Looks like they’re on break, Mr. Tiny,” he said.

“That’s LITTLE!” screeched the Mr. Little. Regaining his composure again, he drew a shaky breath and repeated, “Little. Mr. Little. And about the Bloobers…” He sneered in a most unpleasant fashion as three enormous Flying Bloobers suddenly appeared out of nowhere, lunging at Iggy. He ducked, sending the Bloobers crashing onto the floor behind him.

“Not very smart, are they?” he commented, too soon. They were up again and zipping towards him at lightning speed.

He made for the nearest door, which ended up leading outside. As he ran, he felt around inside his shell, but it was just his luck that he’d forgotten his wand.

Iggy spent most of the day running for his life, dodging this way and that, always one step ahead of those pesky Bloobers. He avoided collapsing from exhaustion by hiding behind a tree or abnormally large boulder every now and then, but it was never too long before the Bloobers found him and he was back on his feet again. Mr. Little laughed manically as he surveyed the situation, enjoying himself immensely.

Of course, nobody was around to notice Iggy, let alone help him. Most of the Koopalings were off doing who knows what, and Bowser was out as well. It was almost night by the time Ludwig returned, looking tired, battered and for the most part totally whipped. This was most likely the result of an assault on the Mario Brothers.

Iggy was by now thoroughly worn out. He ran as best he could, but the Bloobers were gaining. Finally, he just couldn’t do it anymore. After a whole day of almost non-stop running, his muscles gave out. He collapsed on the ground, shaking from pure exhaustion. The Bloobers didn’t have much distance to cover and were on him in a second.

As the Bloobers began to carry him off, Iggy couldn’t resist in the least. He just didn’t have the energy. He almost didn’t care what happened to him just then, just so long as he could stop running. He was almost glad to be able to finally stop, forgetting in his gratefulness just exactly what had ahold of him.

“Mwahahahaha!” he laughed in a sort of frenzied joy. “Victory is mine now, and you shall regret ever… uh, being born! Yeah!”

Ludwig hadn’t noticed any of this so far. The whole scene was quiet up until then, but Mr. Little’s mad laughter suddenly caught his attention. He stopped and looked around, spotting the Bloobers easily. Battered as he was, he grew suspicious and began to walk towards them. As he grew closer, he could make out Iggy, who was slung over the back of one of the Bloobers. By squinting his eyes just right he could almost make out Mr. Little. He quickened his pace but made sure to be quiet.

“Exactly vut do you think you are doing vith Iggy?” demanded Ludwig, approaching the scene and raising his wand warily.

Mr. Little was caught totally off-guard when Ludwig approached, and stared for a moment before he could think of anything to say. “Uh…” he faltered. “These Bloobers are totally under my control! One wrong move, and your brother gets it!”

Ludwig wasn’t fooled. He saw through his phoney confidence and pointed his wand towards the Bloober that was holding Iggy. A jagged beam of magic seared through the air, connecting with the Bloober and causing it to drop Iggy, who fell to the ground and landed with a thud. A sizzle of electricity could be heard. The Bloober writhed in the air for a moment before falling on top of Iggy, dead as a stone. Another zap made short work of the second Bloober as well.

Mr. Little gaped at Ludwig for a moment before leaping on top of the remaining Bloober.

“I’ll get you Koopas yet!” he promised as he retreated as quickly as he could.

Ludwig smugly watched the little grey Goomba run off for a minute or so before a groan reminded him about Iggy, who hadn’t so much as attempted to stand since falling from the Bloober’s grip. Ludwig struggled to lift the now-dead Bloober off. Shoving it to the side, he turned back to his younger brother.

“Are you all right?” he asked anxiously. “Iggy?”

Iggy attempted to raise his head, but gave up mid-way through the process. His vision was beginning to blur, and the grass suddenly seemed awfully comfortable. In his weary mind, all that mattered at the moment was to get some rest, hopefully to sleep. And so he did. He fell asleep right then and there outside the castle.

***

“Hey! I think he’s waking up!”

“Are you certain?”

“I dunno, he’s moving a bit…”

Confused, Iggy tried to make sense of what he was hearing. It seemed to him as if he should be able to understand, and yet at the same time the sounds seemed unintelligible, a jumble of rumbles and vibrations. And why couldn’t he see anything? It was so dark… He groaned in frustration.

“I heard something!” a voice exclaimed. Yes, that’s what it was, he realized. A voice. He had a feeling he knew who the voice came from.

Suddenly, it all came flooding back. Mr. Little, the Bloobers, being chased, falling. He opened his eyes very suddenly but was forced to close them again due to the light, which seemed blinding after the relative darkness of when his eyes were closed. Slowly, he opened them again. Two figures came into view, blurred at first, but slowly came in to focus. Ludwig and Lemmy.

“Unh?” he wondered.

“Iggy!” the two Koopalings exclaimed.

“Last time I checked…” Iggy responded groggily. He sat up and rubbed his eyes.

“Whew,” Lemmy sighed. “I’m glad you’re all right.”

“We feared the worst,” explained Ludwig.

“Yeah, well I’m fine,” said Iggy flatly, standing up. Still feeling faint, he leaned on the bedpost for support. He looked around to see that he was in his room and had been lying on his bed. Lemmy and Ludwig were seated near his bed, but were now getting up themselves.

“I’m extremely glad to see that you are awake,” said Ludwig. After making sure Iggy was all right he left, noting that it was getting dark and he wanted to get to bed early.

“So,” said Iggy wearily. “I suppose now we have to go on to the next tourist?”

“No, no,” Lemmy assured him. “I think running around all day has been exercise enough.”

Iggy paused. Though he hadn’t stopped to think of it that way until then, it had been pretty good exercise. “But what about the rehearsal?” he asked.

“Well, you have some time left,” Lemmy pointed out. “Take a break for a while. Rest up, then come to me when you’re ready.”

Iggy considered. Though he wasn’t feeling the greatest, he didn’t want to have to spend his break time worrying. “I’m ready now,” he said, with a resolve that surprised even him.

Lemmy cocked his head at his brother, wondering whether he was really up to it. “Well, if you’re sure.”

“Positive,” assured Iggy. He tried to sound confident.

Meeting once again in the gym, Iggy took his place at his starting platform, as did Lemmy. He was more sure of himself this time. Heck, if he could survive being chased around by Bloobers all day, he could certainly do this.

“One…”

“Two…”

“Three!”

Iggy made it to his first swing without much difficulty. Wasting no more time than it took to take a deep breath, he immediately swung himself upwards with all his might. It worked; he and Lemmy met in the middle, catching each other and twirling about a bit before pushing off to the next swing, opposite of the one they’d each begun at. As they swung back towards each other, Iggy grabbed hold of Lemmy as he released his swing and thrust him upwards to a higher swing and somehow grabbed the swing with his legs. With a bit of a flip, he accomplished the same, holding on to Lemmy’s hands. With a twist and a flick on Lemmy’s part, Iggy was then flying towards the platform he had started on. He landed, but lost his balance. He wheeled his arms around in a desperate attempt to stay on. It looked almost comic, but he was unable to regain his balance and abruptly fell off. Lemmy, who couldn’t continue, climbed down the ladder and met him at the bottom.

“Wow, that was great!” Lemmy exclaimed. “That’s the farthest we’ve come yet. You almost did it, too!”

“Yeah. Almost,” said Iggy unhappily. He turned and left the gym, despite Lemmy’s assuring just how well he’d done. It didn’t matter how close he’d come, he thought miserably. What mattered was that he hadn’t been able to do it. He’d failed.

As he trudged back into his bedroom, he glanced at the clock and realised that it wasn’t too late. This lifted his spirits a little, and he enjoyed a few hours of television before bed. He slept soundly that night, despite the gloomy thoughts that hovered around his head like a sodden rain cloud.

***

The next morning, Iggy went so far as to meet Lemmy in the gym. He was almost there when Lemmy hurried up on his ball just before he entered.

“So, who is it today?” asked Iggy.

“You’ll see,” answered Lemmy, pushing the door open and shoving Iggy inside. To his surprise, he suddenly found himself staring almost face-to-face with a Birdo. A blaring white, female Birdo.

“It figures,” muttered Iggy. He glanced over his shoulder, but Lemmy had already left.

“Hi!” greeted the Birdo, whom Iggy had already recognized as Rachelle.

“Hi,” said Iggy. “So, what’s your ‘test’?”

“Dodgeball!” she grinned. It was an odd thing to see. Her mouth didn’t do the smiling so much as her eyes did. “Except we’re going to play my way: with eggs! The game is over when someone falls over.”

“But wait, how am I supposed to-” Iggy stopped short as an egg the size of a football suddenly smacked him in the face.  Another one was soon to follow, but Iggy ducked and it whizzed on passed him. A dull splat was heard as it connected with the wall.

Iggy spend a good deal of time just running from the eggs, which Rachelle never seemed to run out of. Every few seconds another one would fly in his direction. Though he was able to dodge a good percentage of them, he was soon nearly covered in egg white. Wiping the eggs off of his glasses, he looked up just in time to avoid the next one.

“This isn’t fair!” he complained. “How am I supposed to even play?”

“Figure it out!” yelled Rachelle happily.

At least she seemed to be enjoying herself, thought Iggy bitterly. Just how was he supposed to play at all without anything to throw? He thought about this for a moment, evading yet another egg by sideswiping it with his hand before it connected. This gave him an idea.

As the next egg flew towards him, he outstretched his hand as if to catch it. It was going too fast however, and merely shattered on impact, coating his hand in egg goo. Thinking maybe it was only a chance occurrence he tried the same idea a few times before he realized that it was no good.

“Drat,” he said to no one in particular.

Getting another idea, he began to run. As the next egg zoomed in he used both his hands and stomach, catching it like a football. It didn’t break this time. Venturing as close as he dared (and dodging a few more eggs), he took careful aim and let it fly. To Rachelle’s surprise, she suddenly found herself being hit in the face with one of her own eggs.

“Now you’re getting it!” she cried, spitting another egg in Iggy’s direction.

The game was soon in full swing. Both players were soon covered in egg white from head to toe, as was the majority of the floor… and the walls, and the ceiling. But neither was giving in, so the game continued. After a while, it became hard to move anywhere quickly without slipping on the egg white. They inched along as fast as they dared, still pelting each other with the huge eggs.

Some time and a few games later, Iggy still had yet to win. He’d slipped on the eggs and fallen on the floor more than once, but was still determined to win. And besides, it was fun!

Finally a lucky throw landed one on Rachelle’s tail. Though it had happened before, it knocked her off balance. Regaining your balance while treading on broken eggs is a tricky business, and it wasn’t too long before she found herself on the floor. Dazed, she tried to get to her feet but slipped and fell to the floor again.

“All right Iggy,” she laughed. She carefully stood back up “Fair’s fair. You win.”

At this Iggy cheered. He jumped for joy, knowing that he had completed the last "test". This proved to be a mistake, for as he landed he found that his feet couldn’t grip the egg-coated ground. He fell over.

“Ouch,” he said, attempting to stand up. It took him a few tries.

Once both the Koopaling and the Birdo were standing again, something dawned on them. Looking first at each other, then at the room around them, they realized that they couldn’t leave the gym covered (and I do mean covered) in egg goo.

“Well, let’s get to work,” sighed Iggy.

And so they did. After first wiping themselves clean of the egg white, they scrubbed the floors, washed the walls, and even managed to clean the ceiling. It took a while, but the room was finally sparkling clean and completely free of egg. They sat down to admire their work, and take a well-deserved rest.

“Well,” said Rachelle. “I guess you’re done, then.”

“Yeah, I guess I am,” agreed Iggy. He began to leave the gym.

“Bye!” called Rachelle as he left.

***

Retreating to his room, Iggy realized that the test hadn’t taken all that long. It was shortly after lunch, meaning he still had quite a bit of free time. Except…

He met Lemmy back in the newly cleansed gym a few minutes later. After setting up the equipment they went for the final rehearsal, which turned out perfect. Nearly.

Maybe if Iggy hadn’t been so nervous he’d have been able to concentrate harder, or if he’d glued suction cups to his feet he wouldn’t have fallen off of the platform again. Either way, Iggy had been nervous and he hadn’t glued suction cups to his feet (though he hadn’t really seriously considered it) and he did fall off the platform again. Discouraged once again, he sat down on the lowest step of the ladder.

“Come on, Iggy,” urged Lemmy, so much like he had days ago. “Let’s give it another go! We do have the rest of the day.”

“It’s no use,” moaned Iggy, looking the other way. “I just can’t do it. We may as well just give up now and tell King Dad to send us to the dungeon.” He looked miserable.

Lemmy sat down beside him, wondering if maybe he’d been wrong. Maybe five days just hadn’t been enough time. Iggy sure looked fit enough, but his self-esteem had been badly beaten down. He just didn’t believe he could do it anymore. But maybe that was it! He jumped back up.

“No, Iggy,” he said firmly. “You’re wrong.”

“Of course I am,” responded Iggy dejectedly. “I’m always wrong. I can’t do anything right.”

“No, I mean you’re wrong about not being able to do it. You can do it.”

“Huh?”

“You heard me. We have all day to practice, so let’s get back up there and get it right because I know that you can do this.” His tone was so certain that even Iggy had trouble convincing himself otherwise.

“All right,” said Iggy half-heartedly. “Lets give it another shot.”

They practiced until sundown. Four hours and then some. By the time they headed for bed they’d been able to do the whole routine perfectly (over and over), and even been able to add a little on to the end. Iggy went to bed feeling pretty proud of himself. He had been able to do it after all.

***

Iggy was able to sleep in for the first time in five days. The extra sleep did him some good, and he was refreshed and ready to go by the next morning. The birthday party didn’t even start until lunchtime, so they had some time for a few extra run-throughs before the big show. When he had weighed himself, he’d even been pleasantly surprised to discover that he weighed almost exactly what he had before his accident.

Finally, it really was time. Iggy was sure of it this time because he had pinched himself to make sure he wasn’t dreaming. Everyone was there, and Bowser seemed very happy with how his party had been going so far. The last thing Iggy wanted to do was screw it up, but he told himself he wouldn’t have to worry about that. He took his place on his platform. Giving Lemmy a thumbs-up, they began the count.

“One…” began Lemmy.

“Two…” Iggy shifted his weight from one foot to the next, nervous yet determined.

“Three!” they both finished together, jumping to the first swing.

Everything went as planned. Nothing went wrong, and they’d even been able to throw in a couple of extra tricks. Iggy smiled to himself as he and Lemmy jumped down in to the net at the end. The rest of the Koopalings cheered as loud as they could, clapping wildly.

Bowser seemed pretty pleased too, and even told the two how well they did. Then he asked for his present. Stiffly turning around, Iggy tapped on Lemmy’s shoulder.

“Lemmy…” he said slowly. “You did remember to get King Dad a present, didn’t you?” Lemmy’s smile vanished.

Seemingly realizing that they had not in fact remembered to get him a present, Bowser’s relatively pleasant mood suddenly and violently erupted.

“Boys!” he yelled, eyes blazing. “Dungeon, NOW!”

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