Petey Piranha: He could knock an opponent out with his putrid breath, but that's not even an attack. |
General Guy: He's got a head on his shoulders, but does he have muscles on his arms? |
Larry: Will his desire for revenge power him to victory? Nah, he's still a loser... |
Yoob: I'm not sure what his abilities are, but if he eats his opponent, he probably wins. |
The announcer:
The referee:
***
Kamek: Ak… ak… ackak… ak…
Roy: What the?
Kamek: Ack… ak… akk…
Roy: Wait! You must have laryngitis!
Kamek: Ack…
Roy: WOOHOO! I WAS SICK AND TIRED OF YOU ANNOUNCING!
Fawful: Finally, it is of the turn for me, FAWFUL, to annou-
Roy: Roy Special!
KA–BAM!
Larry: ACK! YOU KNOCKED OUT FAWFUL! Who are we going to find as an announcer now?
Roy: Um… I know! I’ll just announce myself!
Larry: Oh boy, this is going to be weird.
Roy: So, losers, welcome to another stupendous match at Roy’s Sports Hall! In the Red Corner we have the freak of a Piranha Plant, Petey Piranha!
Petey: GLABLAAG!
Roy: And in the Blue Corner, we have the incredibly obese Yoshi from outer space, Yoob!
Yoob: #)($*@&&@#&! #@$@! #(*$&*@(#***!
Roy: Okay, loser extroardinaire, what’s your pick?
Larry: Well, after intense examination–
Roy: Ahem.
Larry: All right, all right, I picked Petey Piranha because he’s a plant. Just…fight already.
DING DING DING!
Petey Piranha: GLABALGALG!
SPLORT!
Yoob: #$@#$! #$#@$***(!
Roy: Petey Piranha just shot mud at Yoob, but he seems unscathed!
Yoob: #$#@$(** @#($*#@& #*!
TUNG!
Petey Piranha: GLAG!
CHOMP!
Yoob: @***************!
Roy: Now Yoob tried to eat Petey, but Petey took a big bite right down on Yoob’s tongue!
Yoob: **********! **************! **************! #@(#*$&@*#((&$(&#@($& #(*$ @#$((!
BOOT!
Petey Piranha: AG! LAG AG!
FOOM!
Yoob: @(#*&!
Roy: Yoob kicked Petey, who then shot lava right at Yoob! DAD, this is boring…
Audience: RAH! RAH! RAH!
Yoob: #@($*&!
TUNG!
Petey Piranha: GlALALALAL!
CHOMP!
Yoob: ******************!
Roy: Yoob’s so stupid, he tried the same attack against Petey twice! He’s taking severe damage!
Yoob: #$(*&@…@#)(****!
POP!
Roy: Yoob has just lay an egg!
Tikititikititikiti… WHOOSH!
Petey Piranha: GLAG!
CHOMP!
Roy: And shot it at Petey Piranha, who caught it in his mouth!
Yoob: @#)(*$! (#*$&@(#*$&! (((@!
VOIP!
Sunnycide: #)($@#*)$@)(#*!
BAM! WHAM! PAM! SPLAM! WHAP! WHAM!
Petey Piranha: AG… AG… AG…
GARROTE! IMMOLATE! ASPHYXIATE! BEAT UP! KILL! DESTROY! BRAINS!
Petey Piranha: Agaga…ag.
Roy: Wow! Even I’m excited this time! The egg turned into Sunnycide, who proceeded to decimate Petey Piranha for the win! Yoob wins!
Yoob: @#$(*#@&!
TUNG!
Larry: AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!
Roy: Dang! Yoob just ate Larry! Now who am I going to shock?
Kamek: Ak..Ak…AKKKKKK–PLEH!
Roy: What the?
Kamek: Sorry *koff* I had a piece of… um… cactus in my throat.
Pokey: KAAAAAA-MEK?
Kamek: Oh boy.
Pokey: YAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
Audience: POKEY! POKEY! POKEY!
Kamek: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! END TRANSMISSION! END TRANSMI–
BONK!
The winner:
The loser:
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Now you have a choice:
You can go back and memorize the rest
of the battles.
You can go back to the Boxing
Arena, because I know you loved it so much!
Anyone who rats about the conditions
here will be personally pounded by me! If you'd like a pounding, you can
also go back to Lemmy's
Land.