Bombette, Demolitions Expert: Losing that first challenge was a big blow for us. The fact that this game isn't just a pleasure cruise finally hit home, though I'd have to say getting lost was probably our first hint.

Bow: Can we open some more food?

Goombario: No, we're limiting ourselves to a can a day, remember? We'll have some rice later.

Bow: But we don't have any fire to cook it with!

Goombario: Good point.

Kooper: Let's rub some sticks together!

Watt: Haven't you ever watched that other survival show? I can't remember the name.

Parakarry: Pardon?

Watt: It's coming... coming... drat!

Bow: Huh?

Watt: I lost it. But my point is, the players on that other show never got fire by rubbing sticks together. It just doesn't work.

Sushie: Why?

Watt: Um, I dunno. It just doesn't. Well, they did eventually, but they hurt their hands a lot.

Parakarry: Maybe if Bombette explodes near the fire, it'll light it.

Bombette: It could work.

Sushie: What, and blow up our campsite?

Bombette: Or not.

Parakarry, Mailman: What we need is some guaranteed way to get fire. Like maybe Kooper's Fire Shell move!

Kooper: I know! I can use my Fire Shell move!

Goombario: Good thinking!

Bow: A regular genius!

Parakarry, Mailman: Phooey.

After a long period of aiming, missing, and re-aiming, Kooper finally manages to hit the campfire. It ignites immediately, unfortunately for Kooper.

Kooper: Oww, oww, oww! Hot!

Parakarry: You're supposed to wait until you're out of the flames to get out of your shell, Kooper.

Kooper: I know, I know. Ouch.

Goombario: At least we have a fire now.

Bow: Good. Let's make rice.

Goombario: We still need water, or we can't cook it.

Bombette: What kind of world is it when you need water to cook rice?!

Sushie: I think I may have-

Goombario: No time to waste! We need to find us some water!

Spiny: Yay! Yahoo! Yippee! Hurrah! We won!

Cheep Cheep: Hooray, we get to keep a plastic figure of a Wiggler. I'm ecstatic.

Goomba: But it has words on it, see?

Iggy: Hmm, "Made in Japan".

Cobrat: It's obviously some sort of code for "superior mass".

Dino Torch: Wow, I'm touched. *sniffle*

Ludwig, Genius: I knew it! My mass consists 100% of idiots, excluding myself, of course.

Spiny, Obstacle: That's 110.5 %, stupid!

Ludwig, Genius: *sigh*

Spiny: But isn't it great? Wewonwewonwewonwewonwewon.

Cobrat, Marksman: I'm beginning to wonder if winning that challenge was such a good thing after all. Spiny hasn't shut up since we got back, and no one could get a wink of sleep last night.

Goomba: Shut up!

Ludwig: Cease!

Spiny: Ceeelibrate good times, c'mon!

Dino Torch: You know what? We'll all celebrate when you are quiet.

Spiny: Ha ha, you're funny!

Dino Torch, Pyromaniac: This idiot doesn't understand plain English.

Pidgit: Shut your mouth, or I'll shut it for you!

Spiny: I'm a survivor, I'm gonna make it, I'm a survivor-

Pidgit: That's it! Don't say I didn't warn you!

Pidgit stares at Spiny for second, who seems about to continue singing. Suddenly and without any logical reason, Spiny goes flying across the campsite and crashes into the big crate, which remains unopened still.

Spiny: .-keep on surviving. *twitch*

Iggy (unplugging his ears): Thank you, Pidgit.

Wondering how Iggy could possibly be the only one to understand, the rest of the Mismatch Mass gape at Pidgit, seeming to want an explanation.

Ludwig: Exactly how did you manage to accomplish that?

Pidgit: I told you: I have psychic powers.

Goomba: Uh-huh, and I'm a Piranha Plant. Really, what happened?

Pidgit, Airline Pilot: Freaks.

Iggy: What should we do today?

Cheep Cheep: Does standing around doing nothing sound good?

Spiny: Yeah!

Ludwig: Where is the logic in that?

Spiny: Uhm. Somewhere between the "standing around" and the "nothing", I think.

Ludwig: Never mind.

Goomba: Well, let's see. We don't have fire, food, or shelter.

Dino Torch: We're all set!

Kooper: I'm exhausted. Can we stop looking for a few minutes?

Goombario: Sounds good.

The mass all either sits down or lands on the ground. They stay there for a minute, panting and gasping from their long hike.

Watt, Electrician: Well, now we know that there is absolutely no water anywhere around this area. Soon, I imagine we'll begin searching somewhere outside of the campsite.

Kooper: My legs hurt!

Bombette: What were we looking for again?

Goombario: Water! There has to be some around here somewhere.

Bombette: Oh yeah.

Bow: Aww, now we're starving and exhausted.

Parakarry: What? My ears must be plugged. I could've sworn I just heard you say-

Bow: Oops. I mean, me. Bow. Now I'm starving and exhausted.

Sushie: You know, I just may have the-

Bombette: I don't see what everyone is complaining about. I'm not tired at all!

Parakarry: Bombette, I wish you'd get off of me.

Bombette: But this is fun!

Parakarry: And you're heavy!

Bombette: Was that an insult?!

Parakarry: N-no, I didn't mean-

Bombette: Good, now be quiet!

Sushie: Guys, listen to me! As much as I'm sure you've all enjoyed walking around in very small circles for the last hour-

Sushie is interrupted by a series of loud groans from the group. They are still not making any effort to get back up; the long trek seems to have dazed them.

Kooper: At least we've ended up back at the campsite.

Sushie: We never left the campsite, you idiots!

At this, Sushie is met with six vacant stares. This possibility had obviously not occurred to them.

Watt: You know, Sushie might be right.

Sushie: And besides, we didn't really need to look at all because-

Watt: I wanna go home!

Sushie: But-

Bow: We will find water if it's the last thing we ever-

Sushie: ARGH! I have water!

Kooper: What water? Where?

Sushie: Right here, you moron!

Kooper suddenly finds himself sopping wet as a jet of water comes his way. Sushie smiles innocently.

Kooper: Oh, that water.

Goombario: Why didn't you tell us this before we spent an hour walking in circles?!

Sushie: Well, I did try.

Bow: Forget it. Let's just make another fire so we can eat something that's cooked!

It's getting dark, so Kooper ends up needing Watt to help him aim. It takes a while, but soon a large fire is blazing a ways off from their shelter. They cook some rice, using the used peach can as a temporary "pot".

Watt, Electrician: Finally, I get to do something!

Goomba, Insurance Salesman: Our group is feeling pretty down. It's great that we won the challenge the other day, but it's finally dawned on us that we haven't eaten since we got here. The matches aren't much good for cooking until we have something to cook at all. We did make a nice fire though.

Iggy: This fire is really great and all, but my stomach is still whining!

Cobrat: Not as loud as you are, I'll bet.

Spiny: At least we have water!

Pidgit: What good is that unless we have food?

Ludwig: Very good. It is possible to survive much longer without food than without water.

Goomba: At least we won't be thirsty.

Ludwig: Proper hydration is essential. It will certainly help, though not entirely replacing water.

Spiny: I think somethin's wrong with Cheep Cheep.

Cheep Cheep: Must... have... food.

Cobrat: Huh? Are you all right?

Goomba: Do Cheep Cheeps normally drool like that?

Cheep Cheep: Ugh. So hungry.

Dino Torch: That settles it. We need some food. Now. I think.

Iggy: I can go look!

Pidgit: I will too!

Iggy and Pidgit leave. The remaining mass members stare at Cheep Cheep, who is twitching on the ground, and wonder what to do.

Dino Torch: She doesn't look so good.

Goomba: Why's she like that?

Ludwig: Lack of nutrition, most likely.

Cheep Cheep: ...

Dino Torch: So...

Spiny: What now?

Cobrat: I guess we just wait for Pidgit and Iggy to come back.

Spiny: This is boring. Iggy! Pidgit! Wait for me! I'm coming with you!

Spiny runs off in the direction Iggy and Pidgit left in. The camera follows as he scurries as fast as his little legs can carry him.

Spiny, Obstacle: It's *pant* not easy being *wheeze, gasp* small.

Iggy: You know, I really hate this game. Not only do I get in trouble for trying to be helpful, and there's not even any food. All we get is a big box that won't open.

Pidgit: Well, I'm sure things will get better.

Iggy: Aww, nuts.

Pidgit: What?

Iggy: It's Spiny.

Spiny: Hi guys! Why didn't you wait, didn't you hear me calling?

Pidgit: No. We're still looking for food, so don't get in the way.

Spiny: Yessir! I'll help all I can, sir!

Pidgit: You're already in the way.

Spiny: I'll stop it right away, Pidgit, sir!

Iggy: *sigh*

Spiny: Look! Over there! Yoshi Berries!

Iggy and Pidgit: Where?

Spiny: Over there, see?

Looking, they see a huge bush of Yoshi Berries to their right.

Iggy, Paperweight: Now, how did Spiny ever manage to spot those, when we've been looking here for at least five minutes already?

All questions aside, they gather as many as they can and make a mental note of the area. They rush back to the campsite, with Spiny running ahead happily and humming some annoying song.

Morning. Goombas and other nocturnal creatures hurry back to their hiding places as the sun begins to peek over the horizon. The Paper Pack sleeps peacefully. As the cameraman wakes up, he realizes that he's left the camera running all night. He mumbles something about not getting paid enough, then curses upon realizing that he's just said that to all of the viewers and skims over the scene. It seems that a stranger has wandered into their campsite, as they are forewarned by a blood-curdling scream.

Bow: Eeeeeeek!

Kooper: Zzz. Wha?

Bow: It's a b-b-big caterpillar!

Watt: That's not a caterpillar, silly! It's a Wiggler!

Bow: But it's a giant bug!

Goombario: What's it doing?

Bombette: I think it's kind of cute.

Goombario: Cute or not, it's eating our food! Shoo, shoo! HEY!

The Wiggler takes no notice, merely submerging farther into the bag of rice. It pulls its head out again and munches happily. Bow trembles off to the side as Kooper and Parakarry advance on the Wiggler. Sushie pats Bow's back in an attempt to calm her.

Goombario: Careful! I read that those things are vicious when aroused!

Sushie: Don't hurt it!

Kooper: Don't worry. We're just going to scare it off.

Watt, Electrician: Aww, cute caterpillar. I'd let it stay, but then we'd lose all of our food. Darn.

As Kooper and Parakarry slowly approach, they take the utmost caution so as not to seem threatening. It probably wouldn't make any difference either way, seeing as its whole immediate world seems to revolve around the rice in front of it. It doesn't seem to notice them, or if it does, it doesn't care.

Watt: You guys? Look out for that-

But it's too late. Kooper doesn't see the rock on the ground, and stubs his foot on it. He doubles over and stumbles right in to the Wiggler. He winces, but it doesn't notice him at all.

Kooper: Whew! I think it's safe. Now, if I can just...

As Kooper begins to push the overgrown caterpillar away, Parakarry joins in too. The combined force of their pushing seems to annoy the Wiggler.

Wiggler: Poink!

Parakarry: What does that mean?

Kooper: I don't know. Keep pushing.

Goombario: No, stop!

Again, the warning comes too late. They gives one last shove, and put a little too much energy into it. The Wiggler growls and suddenly turns from yellow to bright red. Its hat falls off and an expression of pure malice sweeps over its face. Startled by this new development, Kooper and Parakarry back off.

Parakarry: G-Goombario? I don't like the look that thing is giving me.

Kooper: At least it stopped eating...

Bow: Aaah! Does it still look cute now, Bombette?

Bombette: Well...

Goombario: Aaah! Run for it!

They don't need a warning in this time, and the whole mass begins to run away with the bright red Wiggler in hot pursuit.

Sushie: Nice going, you two!

Kooper: It wasn't my faaaaaaault!

As the same sun reaches the Mismatch campsite, all seems oddly quiet. The site is completely empty aside from the pile of losers, who have all huddled together for warmth, because they have still not put their newly obtained building supplies to use. Cheep Cheep seems to have returned to normal, and the rest of the mass are all still sleeping. When they finally do wake up much later, they are all strangely lethargic.

Iggy, Paperweight: We brought the Yoshi Berries back, and Cheep Cheep ate all of them! I'm glad she's feeling better now, but I wish she'd saved some for us.

Cobrat: Today is the big day. Today is the day we finally build some sort of shelter!

Spiny: Hooray!

Ludwig: Any objections to Cobrat's plan?

All: No!

Cheep Cheep: Then it's settled. The pile of stuff Iggy and I-

Spiny: And Spiny!

Cheep Cheep: ... and Spiny gathered is over there.

Dino Torch: Can we do it later? I'm tired.

Goomba: ZzzZzzZ...

Pidgit: Someone should really wake Dino Torch. *yawn*

Iggy: Later sounds good.

Cheep Cheep: What possible reason is there to wait? We should go now.

Cobrat: I wonder why everyone's so tired?

Ludwig: Insufficient amount of nutrition would be the most likely cause.

Cobrat: Oh. Maybe we ought to go back to the berry bush and- HEY! Don't go to sleep!

Strangely enough, four of the eight members seem to have drifted off during the last few dialogues. Pidgit has fallen to the ground, asleep. Iggy, Dino Torch, and Goomba are sawing logs on the ground.

Cobrat, Marksman: I'm not that boring, am I?

Spiny: Why's everyone sleeping?

Cheep Cheep: I'm not tired! Let's go get some food!

Ludwig: Yes, let's.

Cobrat: Well, they're not getting up any time soon.

Spiny: I know where it is! Follow me!

Ludwig, Genius: We're following Spiny? I suddenly feel unwell.

Spiny: Come on, I know the way!

A few minutes later...

Spiny: See? We're here!

Ludwig: Spiny, that's the mailbox, not the berry bush.

Spiny: Mailbox, Yoshi Berry bush, same thing.

Cheep Cheep, Athletic Swimmer: I guess we shouldn't blame him. I'll bet he really thinks they're one and the same.

Cobrat: I wonder if we have any mail?

Spiny: Oh, lookie! We do, we do!

Spiny rummages around in the mailbox for a few seconds. A long time, considering that it's almost completely empty.

Spiny: Wow, this is a big leaf. What's it say?

Cheep Cheep: It's a poem. Must be about the next challenge.

Yo! How goes the Survivor diet?
Bet you wish you hadn't tried it.
So we invite you, if you dare,
To dine like kings, nothing's spared.
If you're starving, be sure to come,
Before to starvation you succumb.

Spiny: Food!

Cobrat: Sounds pretty fishy, if you ask me. Sorry, Cheep Cheep.

Spiny: Will we halfta eat leaves?

Ludwig: It's unclear. The leaf it's inscribed in would suggest that, yes. May I see it?

Spiny: Oops, I thought you didn't want it.

Cobrat: Where is it, then?

Spiny: I ate it.

It is hours later, and the Paper Pack is still running away from the raging Wiggler, which they discover has a surprisingly high level of endurance. Curses and threats fly from the mass, but they don't dare slow down. A few of them are bruised or scratched, and Kooper is sporting a bite on his leg.

Watt, Electrician: This *puff, puff* really *pant* stinks.

Bow: That thing is evil!

Bombette: I still think it looks cute.

Parakarry: Well, you wouldn't if you were actually running like the rest of us, wouldn't you?!

Bombette: But I can't run fast, and you get to fly!

Parakarry: Doesn't mean I don't get tired!

Kooper: Ahhhh! I want my mommy!

Goombario: Maybe we can lose it!

Bow: Great idea, but how?

Goombario: Maybe if we lead it to the watering hole, we can jump in and it'll leave us alone.

Sushie: Why, can't Wigglers swim?

Goombario: I'm open to any other suggestions!

Not being able to think of any, they continue running and veer off on the direction of the watering hole. It takes another fifteen minutes, but they do eventually find it again. They collapse into the water and try to make sure they don't sink. The Wiggler doesn't seem to like the water. It stands near the edge and waits for them to come out.

Watt: It'll go away, won't it?

Goombario: I don't know. Let's just wait.

Kooper: My leg.

Sushie: Let me see.

Sushie swims over to examine Kooper's bitten leg while everyone else stares at the Wiggler, willing it to leave. It doesn't.

Sushie: That bite is only superficial. I just hope it doesn't get infected.

Kooper: Infected?

Bow: Oh yes. Do you have any idea of how many germs and bacteria are just floating around this place?

Kooper: N-no, I didn't.

Hours pass, and the enraged Wiggler shows no signs of growing bored. The day passes slowly, very slowly.

Bow: As of today, I officially HATE all bugs.

Bombette: I thought you already did.

Bow: But now I loathe them.

Bombette: Ah.

Parakarry: This is really annoying. Is anyone else here getting hungry?

Sushie: Now that you mention it, yeah, I am.

Watt: I'm tired of hiding from the mean old Wiggler!

Bombette: Yeah.

Goombario: You guys want to make a run for it?

All but Goombario: YES!

Goombario: All right, on the count of three, we run like all heck. 1, 2, 3!

And so they do. But, having nowhere else to hide, they end up slowly losing ground to the never tiring Wiggler.

Kooper: Think we can attack it? You know, scare it away?

Sushie: It's worth a try.

After several failed attempts to scare it away by water assault, head bonking, shell shooting, electricity, and explosions, they finally just stop, dumbfounded that their strongest attacks haven't done a thing. They are soon trampled under the many feet of the Wiggler for their stupidity.

Watt: Owie.

Goombario: That smarts!

A few more complaints are issued. They're just about sure they're done for when the Wiggler stops charging. It resumes its normal color and dim expression and wanders off, apparently finally losing interest. The pack collapses in a heap and stays there, not wanting to move at all.

Dino Torch, Pyromaniac: While a few of us were sleeping, Ludwig, Cobrat, Cheep Cheep, and Spiny found some mail. Or at least, they say they did, but they didn't come back with anything.

Goomba: So tell me again. We got a big leaf in the mail, and it told us about the next reward challenge?

Spiny: Yeah, it said something about kings and dinner.

Cobrat: Uh, Cheep Cheep?

Cheep Cheep: Something about a challenge involving food.

Dino Torch: Food?

Ludwig: Correct, though I believe there was possibly something that the letter didn't mention.

Iggy: Like what?

Ludwig: I don't know, as Spiny consumed the leaf before I could thoroughly examine it.

Pidgit: I'm hungry enough to eat anything right now.

Cheep Cheep: Even toxic waste? Dust bunnies? That stuff that builds up underneath the fridge?

Pidgit: Well, uh...

Cheep Cheep: Didn't think so.

Spiny: Let's sing a song!

Goomba: Let's not!

Spiny: Aww...

Cobrat: I guess we should practice eating disgusting foods, then?

Pidgit: How can we do that when we haven't got any food in the first place?

Cobrat: That is a problem.

They stand there, thinking. One by one, every eye shifts towards the big box, which remains unopened as it has from the beginning of the show.

Ludwig: I would assume that there is some foodstuff in there.

Spiny: What's foodstuff?

Goomba: Let's give it another try.

Dino Torch: FLAMEBROIL, ROAST, BURN, BLAZE!

Iggy: He's freaky.

Dino Torch again charges at the crate in an all out flame frenzy, but the box is still unharmed and he ends up bonking into the side of it.

Dino Torch: Ouch.

Finally taking the time to look at it more closely, Ludwig notices something.

Ludwig: What's that?

Cobrat: It's some sort of tab.

Spiny: Pull it pull it pull it!

Ludwig does, causing the box's top to flip open and off, revealing the contents. Eight orange yellow bandanas, a large tin of rice, and a first aid kit lay neatly packed and folded, as if the box itself hadn't already been tossed and tipped countless times.

Cheep Cheep, Athletic Swimmer: I don't believe it. We spent all that time trying to open that box by force, when there was a tab we could have just pulled the whole time?!

They stare for a full few minutes before pouncing on the rice, hastily making a fire and enjoying the first actual food (besides the berries, of course) in days.

The Mismatch Mass has gathered at the location of the challenge. They wait, but the Paper Pack doesn't show up for a long while. Finally, an hour late, they show up. They are battered and bruised, but none the less determined as they trudge towards the others.

Lemmy: Finally, you're all here!

Bow: No one told us about any reward challenge today!

Lemmy: Well, it's not my fault you didn't check you mail, is it now?

Parakarry: We get mail here?

Lemmy: Mismatch Mass, if you will kindly wake your members, we can continue.

Most of the Mismatch Mass has fallen asleep, and Ludwig and Spiny have a hard time shaking them awake. Finally, the whole mass stares at Lemmy blankly. It's not entirely clear whether they're paying attention or not, but Lemmy continues.

Lemmy: Right. You're all gathered here because you want to win this reward challenge. You're hungry. You're tired. But this is relatively easy, so just try to stay conscious long enough to- Ludwig?

Cheep Cheep: Wake up!

Ludwig: Zzz- huh?

Lemmy: Ah, the famous "icky food challenge", If you turn around, you'll notice a big wheel, similar to one you might expect to see on the Wheel of Fortune. This wheel, however, has not numbers but names, types of food, to be exact. You'll spin it once and eat whatever the wheel stops at. If you're lucky, it won't be disgustingly gross. Paper Pack, you're short one member, so someone's going to have to go twice. The first one to refuse to eat what they get automatically loses the challenge for their mass. Everyone understand?

Spiny: No.

Lemmy: Great. What you're playing for is this: a map that'll lead you to a good food source.

Lemmy hold up the map. The Mismatch Mass gazes in reverent awe, whereas the Paper Pack suddenly seems unsure, remembering their past experiences with the map.

Lemmy: First up is Goombario. Spin the wheel.

Goombario takes a tentative step towards the giant wheel, then spins it as hard as he can. It spins for a while before landing on "sewage water", He takes a deep breath and guzzles the glass Lemmy hands him, returning to his mass's line-up.

Lemmy: Next is Iggy.

Iggy tries to appear confident as he walks up and whacks the wheel. As he nurses his throbbing hand, it shifts a few inches over to "frog eyes". He nearly faints, but manages to choke them down and leaves.

Lemmy: Kooper, it's your turn.

Kooper walks up and gives the wheel a kick. It lands on "turkey feet". Fortunately, Kooper has no idea what a turkey is and has no trouble finding room in his stomach.

Lemmy: Come on, Ludwig.

Ludwig smirks as he strides over and spins the wheel, which lands on "Koopa Fruit". He holds his nose and mutters something about chocolate as he forces it down.

Ludwig: Oh, disgusting.

Lemmy: Parakarry!

Parakarry flies over and spins the wheel as hard as he can. The wheel edges over about two spaces and lands on "worms". He gags as he tries to swallow the three he is given whole, but ends up having to chew them before he can finish. He looks queasy as he returns to the Paper Pack.

Lemmy: Spiny, get over there.

Spiny scampers up to the wheel eagerly, but stops and stares at it with a very confused expression. After Lemmy re-explains how to use the wheel (twice), he happily gobbles down his food, which turns out to be raw egg.

Lemmy: Bow.

Things continue on like this. Bow gives the wheel a spin and winces as she nearly chokes on her snack, a live cockroach. Pidgit rejoices as he receives a chocolate bar. Watt shudders as she struggles not to bring the moldy bread back up. Cobrat dutifully eats his dirt, whereas Sushie is pleasantly surprised by a slice of watermelon. Things continue on like this until Cheep Cheep's turn comes around. She spins the wheel bravely, and a gasp resounds from the mismatch match as the pointer lands on "lox".

Cheep Cheep: You expect me to eat another fish?!

Lemmy: Well, er...

Cheep Cheep: I'm not eating that.

Lemmy: The reward depends on it, Cheep Cheep. You either eat it, or the Paper Pack wins.

Cheep Cheep: I... I can't.

Lemmy: Victory to Paper Pack! Here's your prize.

Lemmy hands the map to Kooper, who quickly runs off with it before the rest of the pack can get in another word edgewise. He scurries away with his whole mass in hot pursuit. The Mismatch Mass applauds politely (excluding Spiny, who doesn't seem to have grasped the concept and has started up with yet another annoying song).

Bow, Boo Princess: For those of you who came in late, we just won our first challenge! It wasn't for immunity, but it'll sure help our morale.

Bombette: Yah! And we still have tonight to look forward to!

Kooper: What, you're happy about the immunity challenge?

Bombette: Yep! We'll beat the Mismatch Mass so bad they'll be hurting for weeks!

Bow: Yeah!

Watt: Um, can we eat some rice? My stomach is making funny noises.

Bow: It's growling, Watt. Growling.

Watt: Yeah, my stomach's growling.

Bombette: I thought you didn't like rice.

Watt: After yesterday's moldy bread, rice doesn't seem so bad.

Sushie: Food sounds good.

Parakarry: I could use a good breakfast!

Kooper: I'm starved!

Goombario, Journalist: Doesn't anyone think about anything other than food? *gurgle*

Goombario: Me too! I'm hungry!

Parakarry cooks some rice, and they each enjoy a cupfull of it. Where they found the cups is a mystery event to me.

Goombario: Maybe we should use that map to find the food?

Parakarry: Good idea. Where is it, by the way?

Sushie: I thought you had it.

Parakarry: But I thought Watt had it!

Watt: I gave it to Bow!

Bow: And I last saw Kooper with it.

Kooper: *whistles*

Goombario: Kooper, what did you do with the map we won yesterday?

Kooper: Well, uh, you know how you told me to make a fire?

Goombario: Yeah. Wait a minute. You didn't!

Kooper: I didn't mean to! It fell in while I was adding kindling!

Bombette: You mean I ate that rock for nothing?!

Kooper: Well, not nothing. We do have a nice fire now.

Goombario: You'd just better be glad that we already have some food.

Kooper: Sorry.

Sushie: It all right, I'm sure you didn't-

Bow: We worked hard for that map!

Parakarry, Mailman: And to think, I had to eat worms for a map that we don't even have anymore.

Kooper; Now, guys. I'm sure we can think of an excellent way to solve this. preferably blood-free.

Watt: What does "preferably" mean?

Parakarry: I'll tell you later, Watt.

Bow: Grrr...

As the mass advances, Kooper, who had been slowly backing up the whole time, begins to run all-out. Sushie stays behind and shakes her head sadly, while Watt just looks confused. The rest of the mass chases Kooper into the forest, from which exaggerated war cries and high-pitched yelps are heard.

Watt, Electrician: What just happened?

Guy: Hi!

Watt: Oh, it's you again.

Guy: Where's the rest of your lot?

Sushie: None of your business!

Guy: All right then. Here's the poem about the immunity challenge tonight.

The clouds are brewing; you'll soon be wet.
Stay inside and you'll be set.
But the challenge takes place even in the rain.
So get ready or you'll lose again!
Stack the mushrooms; make a tower.
Be the first ones to make it out of the shower!

Watt: It's going to rain?

Looking up, Watt and Sushie see that there are indeed a number of dark clouds in the air, which didn't seem to be there before. The clouds are sodden with rain; it says so in the script.

Sushie: Oh. Thank you!

Guy: Hope it helped.

Guy leaves.

Sushie, Nanny: It didn't.

Cheep Cheep: I'm sorry, guys.

Iggy: What's she sorry for? If it'd been me, I wouldn't have eaten that icky lox either.

Cobrat: You did your best. We all did.

Pidgit: Well, that was just cruel anyways.

Cheep Cheep: Aww, really?

Ludwig: Of course. I'd have consumed it, but that is only my preference.

Goomba: But it was your fault that we lost!

Cheep Cheep: But-

Goomba: You could have just tried to imagine it was something else. You ever heard the expression, "Just grin and bear it"?

Dino Torch: It wasn't her fault, stupid!

Goomba looks about to disagree, when he notices the steam puffing out of Dino Torch's nostrils, after which he backs off timidly.

Cobrat: Let's change the subject. There's still a pile of logs and things we could put to good use.

Ludwig, Genius: All right, so we have not followed through with our plans to construct a shelter as of yet.

Pidgit: Yeah!

Goomba: Meh, why not?

Goomba, Insurance Salesman: I guess I'm in no position to complain right now.

With Ludwig instructing the others, the Mismatch Mass begins to dismantle the pile and build a shelter. Pidgit begins by transporting things with his carpet to and from the ground. After a while, he seems to think this slow and begins, much to the surprise of the others, to move them without any physical means at all. It takes all of them (but Iggy, who seems to have grasped the whole thing better than anyone else, somehow) a few minutes to realize that it's Pidgit that's making the logs fly around, but after the initial confusion they resume the building. It takes the whole day, but they've eventually constructed a big, round... something. It appears to be a large, black dome shape.

Ludwig: Isn't it magnificent?

Spiny: Yeah! What is it?

Ludwig: It is a waterproof, aerodynamic, self-air-conditioning, independent multi-level indoor complex, designed and copyrighted by me!

Dino Torch, Pyromaniac: That's just sad.

Cobrat: Uh, let's just call it our dome, ok?

Ludwig: If it better suits the individual need of the mass members, then so be it.

Spiny: Wow! A big dome thing!

Iggy: It looks pretty cool.

Pidgit: I don't care what it look like, I just want see what it's like inside!

They all stampede into the big dome structure, amazed at the luxurious décor and spacious rooms. Pidgit immediately makes his way upstairs with Cheep Cheep, who discovers a large fish tank and stares at it bemusedly. Iggy, Goomba, and Spiny rush to the TV set. Ludwig and Cobrat step into the kitchen, while Dino Torch amuses himself by playing with the electric stove.

Iggy: Wow, this place even has an N64!

Spiny: Cool! I get the first controller!

Iggy: No, I do!

Goomba: You're both wrong. I get the first controller.

Spiny: MEEEE!

In the next room...

Dino Torch: Wow, Ludwig! How'd you (flick) ever figure out how to (flick) make all of this (flick, flick) neat stuff?

Cobrat: Stop playing with the stove.

Ludwig: It's all built with bamboo, brilliantly altered to the point of electric capacity and shiny metal-like surface.

Ludwig, Genius: Actually, I stole it from the producer, but they don't need to know that.

Cobrat: Wow, you're smart.

Dino Torch: Yeah Ludwig (flick), that's really (flick, flick) ingenious of you to be able to (flick)-

Cobrat: Stop playing with that stove, will you?!

The masses are once again assembled. As the poem had predicted, it's pouring rain, and everyone is sopping wet. Two very annoyed masses scowl at Lemmy, clad in a nice dry poncho, as he clears his throat to speak.

Lemmy: Mismatch Mass, I need you to hand over the Immunity Idol.

Spiny: No! It's mine!

Dino Torch wrestles with Spiny for a bit before retrieving the Idol and handing it to Lemmy.

Lemmy: Thank you. I guess you've noticed that it's raining?

Goombario: Thank you, Mr. Observant.

Lemmy: This task is simple. Over there is a small cliff, with two indentations, which are each large enough to hold an entire mass. Using those mushroom blocks over there, get your whole mass into one of the caves. That's it! Now, this is for immunity. Losers ready? Go!

And they're off. The Paper Pack is off to a rough start, literally tripping over themselves in their eagerness, and the Mismatch mass is the first to get to their area off the cliff. There they find five mushroom blocks (think SMB 2). The cliff itself, while already fairly high, is even more difficult to scale being that it is a sheer drop from top to bottom. In other words, the cliff is flat as a wall, with few ledges. As the Paper Pack manages to finally get over to their area, the Mismatch Mass already has a head start and has begun to pile the blocks into the vertical stack, with Pidgit placing the uppermost blocks as it becomes higher. The Paper Pack, when they catch up, seems to have a different approach and stack their blocks in to a pyramid, allowing them to easily climb up to the top. However, their pyramid is now considerably shorter than the Mismatch Mass's stack.

Dino Torch: Good, our pile is higher than theirs!

Cobrat: One problem, hothead.

Dino Torch: What?

Pidgit: You guys can't reach the top!

Spiny: Uh oh!

As the Mismatch Mass begins to use Pidgit's carpet for an easy (but slow, as he can only carry one at a time) ride to the top, the Paper Pack is trying to form a stack of players at the top point of their pyramid. Kooper stands on the bottom and breathes heavily as Goombario and Sushie try to balance on top of him. Much closer to the cave now, Parakarry hoists Bombette to the top.

Kooper: What's happening up there?

Sushie: Bombette is trying to jump up into the cave!

Goombario: Are we that close?

Sushie: Almost. I think Watt and Bow are already up there.

Kooper: Well, hurry it up! I'm getting squashed down here!

The Mismatch Mass now has a few members up to the cavern, but in their haste to make it they accidentally knock over their stack of mushroom blocks. They struggle to catch up to the Paper Pack, which now has over half of their members safely up to the small cave. Bow and Watt help to pull up Bombette, who in turn tries her best to do the same even though she doesn't have arms. And as if that wasn't already hard enough, the rain makes everything slippery and they keep needing to grab multiple times before successfully doing so.

Cobrat: Pile those blocks!

Goomba: We're trying!

Iggy: Hurry, hurry, we're losing!

Spiny: Wheee!

Goomba: Don't forget about me!

The Mismatch Mass tries their best to regain their lost ground, but it seems hopeless. The Paper Pack now has only Goombario and Kooper to get to the cave, while the Mismatch Mass only has three in, Ludwig, Spiny, and Cheep Cheep, who have been airlifted by Pidgit. As Parakarry struggles to lift Goombario up, Kooper waits anxiously for his turn. Finally, in a last desperate attempt to stall for time, Iggy picks up Goomba and throws him at the Paper Pack's mushroom block pyramid. Goomba hits dead on and the pyramid comes toppling down with Kooper still standing on it. The Mismatch Mass cheers, but their happiness is short-lived. Parakarry, Bow, and Watt float down and manage, with some difficulty, to lift Kooper to the cavern.

Goomba: Oww.

Lemmy: Victory to the Paper Pack!

Lemmy hands the plastic Wiggler model to the Paper Pack, who jump for joy, then slip in the mud and fall in a large puddle upon landing. The Mismatch Mass pauses only to point and laugh before they too leave. Both masses are sopping wet.

Lemmy: Mismatch Mass! I'll see you tonight for Mass Massacre!

Lemmy: Well, well, well. Mismatch Mass, this is Mass Massacre. It's not a nice place, and you want to keep away from here as often as you can help it. But, since you've lost the challenge, you're here anyway, and this means that you will have to vote out one of your members. The staffs behind you are what symbolize you, as a part of the mass. If you are voted off, you will leave by way of the enormous cannon behind me.

Ludwig: Odd, I did not observe that cannon before now.

Lemmy: Does anyone have anything they'd like to say, any words of wisdom they've gained over the past few days?

Spiny: Bamboo!

Dino Torch: Watching the clouds get boring after the fifth consecutive hour.

Lemmy: I can see how that might make sense. So Cheep Cheep, do you feel in any way responsible for the loss of the reward challenge?

Cheep Cheep: Well, yes, I guess.

Lemmy: That's it?

Cheep Cheep: Well, what did you expect?

Lemmy: I don't know.

Goomba: I'm getting very annoyed because no one's paying any attention to me!

Dino Torch: Sorry, did you say something?

Goomba: Stupid dinosaur.

Spiny: Bamboo!

Lemmy: One at a time, you will each have to go to the confession booth and make your vote. Any questions?

Spiny: Bamboo!

Lemmy: Iggy, you go first.

Iggy goes to vote. Tense, pulsing music plays.

Iggy: My vote goes to Ludwig, just because he annoys me and I can't think of another reason.

Lemmy: Ludwig, your next.

Ludwig goes to vote.

Lemmy: Next- Aww, just go in the order that you're sitting in.

Spiny goes to vote.

Spiny: Bamboo!

Pidgit goes to vote.

Cobrat goes to vote.

Cobrat: I formed a really quick alliance with Ludwig on the way here, so my vote goes to Goomba.

Dino Torch goes to vote.

Goomba goes to vote.

Goomba: I vote for Spiny, because he acts so immature.

Cheep Cheep goes to vote.

Cheep Cheep: You are the weakest link! Goodbye!

Lemmy: I'll go tally the votes. Once they have been read, the decision is final, and you will either climb into the cannon peacefully or I'll use my magical host's powers to force you in.

Lemmy leaves and returns momentarily with the voting bucket. He reaches in and begins unfolding the votes, reading them as he goes.

Lemmy: The first vote goes to... Goomba. The second vote... Ludwig. The third vote... Goomba. The fourth vote... Goomba. The fifth vote... Cheep Cheep. The sixth vote... Spiny. The seventh vote... Goomba. That's four out of seven votes, Goomba.

Goomba: Drat.

Lemmy: Please retrieve your staff, Goomba.

Goomba: Fine. Here.

Lemmy: Now, you get the pleasure of cracking this over the head of whoever you feel was most responsible for voting you off. You can do that now.

Goomba marches up to Iggy and whacks him over the head with his staff. Iggy falls over, unconscious, and Goomba returns to Lemmy.

Lemmy: Now, get in the cannon.

Goomba: I will, but I won't like it!

Lemmy: Goomba, the mass has spoken.

Lemmy lights the fuse. The cannon explodes with the force of a small supernova, sending Goomba somewhere over the pink horizon. After watching Goomba sail away, Lemmy turns back around and smiles.

Lemmy: Hey, you've made it through your first Mass Massacre! You can go now!

As the Mismatch Mass begins to leave, it starts to rains again and they are soon sopping wet. Spiny sticks out his tongue at the camera, and the credits roll.

Goomba, Insurance Salesman, on being voted off: Why me? Why did I have to be the second one voted off? Oh sure, it's always the Goomba. No one cares about me. I've been around since Mario's first game and I am STILL the most neglected baddie out there. This cannot continue, do you hear me?! It will not, and I will personally-

Who voted for who?

Iggy: Ludwig (annoys him)
Ludwig: Goomba (allied with Cobrat)
Spiny: Goomba (bamboo?)
Pidgit: Spiny (just annoying)
Cobrat: Goomba (allied with Ludwig)
Dino Torch: Cheep Cheep (random vote)
Goomba: Spiny (acts immature)
Cheep Cheep: Goomba (weakest link)

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