It has been a long, tiring day for the Mario Bros., and they are relaxing in the shade of a tree on the castle lawn. Luigi is sipping a strawberry smoothie, and Mario is munching on some fried mushrooms.
Luigi: So, I’d say it’s been a pretty successful adventure, eh, bro?
Mario: Yep, we got all of those Stars back, and we rescued Peach!
Luigi: Man, I’m beat. Do you always do this much stuff in a single game?
Mario: Oh yeah, all in a day’s work.
Luigi lets out a satisfied yawn and sips his smoothie.
Mario: Y’know, I still don’t get it…
Luigi: Get what?
Mario: How you can even stomach that stuff!
Luigi: Huh? What stuff?
Mario: That strawberry junk!
Luigi: What do you mean? This smoothie is delicious!
Mario: That’s disgusting.
Luigi: Oh, you’re one to talk. All you ever eat is mushrooms!
Mario: So what?
Luigi: You never eat anything else!
Mario: You’re just jealous ‘cause you’re allergic.
Luigi: What?!
Mario: You wish you could eat mushrooms like me!
Luigi: Oh, right. That’s it. “I wish I could lie around all day, scarf down mushrooms, and be 300 pounds like my brother Mario.”
Mario: Hey! I exercise too!
Luigi: No you don’t, you lazy slob. Whenever you’re not out saving Peach, you’re sitting in front of the TV playing Zelda games.
Mario: Shh! Don’t tell Link!
Luigi: I don’t know why they don’t recruit me to fight Bowser, I’m twice as fit as you are!
Mario: Hardly! Anything you can do, I can do better!
Luigi: I can do anything better than you!
Mario: No, you can’t.
Luigi: Yes, I can.
Mario: No, you can’t!
Luigi: Yes I can!
Mario: All right, fine. Prove it.
Luigi: Okay! Race to the top of the castle!
Mario: Fine by me! Winner gets free mushrooms!
Luigi: But I’m allergic to mushrooms.
Mario: Good thing I’m gonna win, then!
Luigi: We’ll see!
They take their positions.
Toad: Ready… Set… Go!
Toad fires his pistol, and Luigi takes off in a mad dash towards the castle. Meanwhile, Mario begins to casually stroll in the opposite direction.
Mario: Dum de dum…
Luigi happens to glance over his shoulder and sees Mario walking the other way. He screeches to a halt.
Luigi: *pant, pant* What are you doing?!
Mario: Who, me? Oh, you can keep running. I’m taking the cannon.
Luigi: *pant* Come on, I thought we were-
Luigi blinks.
Luigi: W-what did you say?
Mario: I said, I’m taking the cannon. It’s much quicker than wall-jumping, if you know what I mean.
Luigi: There’s a cannon?! Where?!
Mario gestures down to where he is standing.
Mario: Right here. It’s in the ground. There used to be a grate over it, but it’s open now that we’ve got all the Stars back!
Luigi walks over to the cannon.
Luigi: Wow, that’s pretty cool.
Mario: It should take us to the top of the castle in a jiffy… You wanna go first?
Luigi: No, you go first. You found it.
Mario: As you insist!
Mario hops into the cannon and aims.
Mario: See you on the roof!
BOOM! Mario flies out of the cannon and lands gracefully on the castle roof.
Mario: Haha! I win the race!
Luigi: Oh, quiet up there!
Luigi hops into the cannon and aims it.
Mario: Careful, don’t aim too-
BOOM!
Luigi flies out of the cannon, soars over Mario’s head, and crashes into the waterfall behind the castle.
Mario: … high.
Luigi, soaking wet, emerges from the moat below.
Luigi: Ow… My back…
Mario: Come on, get up here! It’s a great view!
Luigi: Of what?
Mario: Uh… the waterfall?
Luigi: I’ve seen enough waterfall for one day, thank you.
Mario: Oh, just try the cannon once more.
Luigi: Fine…
Luigi hops into the cannon and aims it.
Luigi: If I miss again, I’m suing!
Mario: Okay.
Luigi purposely rotates the cannon 90 degrees.
Mario: That’s not funny!
Luigi: Heh heh… Just kidding.
Luigi aims the cannon at the castle.
Luigi: Here goes nothing!
BOOM!
Luigi flies out of the cannon and… lands on top of the castle!
Mario: Cool! You did it!
Luigi: Hooray, now let’s go home.
Mario: No way! It’s nice up here!
Luigi: It’s nice down there, too.
Mario: Oh, but there’s such a wonderful breeze up here.
Luigi: They have breezes down there, too.
Mario: You’re such a pessimist.
Luigi: You say that like it’s a bad thing…
Later…
The two brothers are still on top of the castle. Mario is finishing up his fried mushrooms, while Luigi is enjoying a nap.
Mario: Hey, bro, you know what I was just thinking about?
Luigi snores.
Mario: Yo, Luigi, wake up!
Luigi: *snort* Huh?
Mario: You know what I was just thinking about?
Luigi: Hmm… mushrooms?
Mario smiles dreamily.
Mario: No, no, besides mushrooms.
Luigi: I give up. What?
Mario: It just occurred to me, there’s only one Mario character who we haven’t seen this entire adventure.
Luigi: Really? Who?
Mario: We haven’t seen… Ganondorf!
Luigi: … Um… that’s not a Mario character.
Mario: Oh yeah. Sorry.
Suddenly, the two begin to hear noises from the other side of the castle roof.
Luigi: What’s that noise?
Mario: You got me. Wanna go check it out?
Luigi: No, not really.
Mario: Well, I’m going to see what it is.
Luigi: It’s probably just a bird.
Mario: Could be…
Just then, the brothers notice that the noise is actually a voice- but it only seems to be saying one two-syllable word.
Mario: See?
Luigi: Oh, I recognize that voice!
Mario: Yeah! Let’s go see him!
Luigi: Okay.
The two brothers make their way around to the other side of the roof, and when they turn the corner they see the source of the voice…
Mario: Ganondorf!
Ganondorf: (muttering) Triforce… Triforce… Huh? What are you doing here?
Luigi: We could hear you talking.
Mario: Still looking for that Triforce, eh?
Ganondorf: Not exactly…
With that, Ganondorf whips off his costume to reveal none other than… a happy, green dinosaur!
Mario: Yoshi!
Yoshi: Hey guys!
Mario: What are you doing up here?
Yoshi: I was waiting for you! I knew you’d show up eventually.
Luigi: Dude, what was with the Ganondorf disguise?
Yoshi: Ah, that. I was bored. It sure did take you two a long time to get all those Stars!
Mario: Well, yeah, but-
Yoshi: But now that you’re here, I’ve got a present for you!
Luigi: Really?
Yoshi: Yup… 99 of ‘em, actually!
Luigi: What are they?
Mario licks his lips hungrily.
Mario: Mushrooms, I hope…
Yoshi: Well, as a matter of fact… they’re 1-Up Mushrooms!
With that, Yoshi hands Mario a box containing 99 1-Up Mushrooms.
Mario: Sweet! The best kind!
Luigi rolls his eyes.
Yoshi: Enjoy!
Mario: Oh, I will!
At that moment, Mario, Luigi, and Yoshi hear a voice coming from below.
Peach: Mario! Luigi! Cake’s ready!
Luigi: Nice!
Mario: We’ll be right down!
Yoshi: Mind if I come too?
Mario: Not at all! Peach’ll be glad to see you too!
Luigi: Just try not to eat the whole cake in one bite, k?
Yoshi: Heh heh… I can’t make any guarantees!