The Crystal Bane of Cruelex

By Arim

Little Lemmy's Land Qualifier

One day the seven Koopalings were really bored because Bowser had taken all of their possesions. Roy was in the dungeon. It happened because Roy had played a nasty trick on Bowser. Then Roy said that the other Koopalings participated in the prank. It wasn´t true.

Ludwig: But King Dad! Can´t I stress how much this negatively effects my scientific researching?You cannot stand in the way of science!

Iggy: Plus, it wasn´t us! Roy made it up!

Wendy: The idiot!

Morton: Yeah! It wasn´t us! Roy made it up just to make us unhappy and it´s so unfair and Roy isn´t nice and
he is mean and I don´t want to have my things taken from me and I-

Bowser: Shut up! And get out of my sight!

The Koopa Kids sulked out of the room. Clawdia was on a trip with Mush and Mud, so they couldn´t ask her for help.

Lemmy: Roy is really mean but he´d never do that to King Dad. I wonder what has gotten into him?

Lemmy: OH YES! I remember I stashed away Susan´s Koopa Trading Card Game in the secret side drawer of my cabinet! We can play that!

Larry: Great!

Before long they were playing the strategy game Susan had created.

Wendy: This strategy game is very good!

Ludwig: I refuse to lower myself and play inferior strategy games that do not compare to my level of intellect. I must continue work on my inventions, I have no time for recreation.

Iggy: Sheesh! Ok, whatever you said.

Larry: Ooh! Nice move, Morton.

Morton: I like this game because you have to think hard and it's really difficult and it makes you smarter and-

Ludwig: Hardly!

Lemmy: Hey! I remember I left one of my card packs in the dungeon when Bowser sent me there. Why was it that he sent me? Anyway, I´ll be back. Hey Ludwig, since you´re not doing anything, wanna come with me?

Ludwig: I´d rather not, it is a long trek to the dungeon and I am not feeling up to physical effort. Besides, don´t you have to do your science report?

Lemmy: Oh yeah, but it´s too difficult.

Ludwig: That is 10.78 times easier than inventing the light bulb.

Lemmy: I´d better go.

Ludwig: Do as you wish.

When Lemmy got to the dungeon it seemed to him that it was gloomier than usual. He passed Roy´s cell and saw him sitting silently. How unlike Roy, he thought. By now Roy would be hitting the walls with his fists, grunting loudly and doing all kinds of Royish stuff.

Lemmy: Roy! Why did you do that?

Roy: ... Have you noticed how delightful this place is?

Lemmy: HUH? Whats the matter?Are you getting enough food?

Roy: Hm. Food. Food is but a mere material which mortals lack.

Mortals lack? Lemmy didn´t quite understand but that way of speaking seemed to strike a heavy fear in him.
He ran (rolled) at high speed to the others.

Lemmy: Pant pant! Roy is acting really strange. He sort of talks like Ludwig.

Ludwig: That cannot be possible. I must investigate this strange behavior of which you speak. Onward in the name of science!

Wendy: What happened Lemmy? You just missed my best game yet.

Iggy: I was the best player!

Wendy: WAS!

Iggy: I mean AM. AM the best player.

Ludwig: Lead the way, ball riding sibling!

When Lemmy and Ludwig got to Roy´s cell, Roy had his eyes closed.

Ludwig: Talk Roy. I shall record my observations while we speak.

Roy: And why, von Koopa, should I cooperate for your so-called scientific experiment?

Ludwig's eyes widened.This was not Roy´s way of talking alright.

Ludwig: Would you like to get out of this cell?

Roy: Why not? Yet I refuse your gentle concern for my well being. You see, I am perfectly well in here, it is
all part of my plan.

Ludwig: What plan?

Roy: I will tell you. Because it is all part of my plan. I am matter, I am antimatter, and I am the most powerful being your young mortal eyes shall ever see.

Suddenly a chilly air from the night blew through the window. Lemmy was so scared that he even fell from
his ball. From Roy´s body emerged a great spirit that looked like Culex.

Culex-like Spirit: I am Cruelex!

The two Koopa Kids were speechless and trembling all over.

Cruelex is truly evil. Bowser is evil but he just wants to rule Plit. Cruelex wants to rain Chaos upon it.

Cruelex: And now that I have finally made it to this dimension through Roy´s soul I shall rain Chaos upon
this world! At first, Roy´s soul battled against me so that I coundn´t gain control over him. My evil desires
fused with his and he was driven to do things that he never would have done. Now I have complete control over him. I shall first start with Sky Land.

A cruel laugh emanated from his lips.

The Koopa Kids stared in silence towards where Cruelex had stood until dawn.

The next morning, four Koopalings sat at the breakfast table together eating breakfast.

Larry: I didn´t see Ludwig and Lemmy at all last night.

Morton: They said that they went to the dungeon but I don´t think they´re still there because they couldn´t
have stayed so long and maybe they went for a walk but I don´t think so because Ludwig and Lemmy are not best friends and if Lemmy wanted to take a walk it would be with Iggy and Ludwig doesn´t like to walk because he doesn´t like exercise and-

Wendy: Ok! Shut up, we get the point!

At that moment Lemmy and Ludwig stormed through the door.

Lemmy: You won´t believe what I saw! I saw Culex´s brother!

Ludwig: But that is biologically impossible!

Iggy: Lemmy! Where were you?

Lemmy told the tale to his siblings.

Wendy: You made that up!


A huge explosion was heard in the distance. The Koopa Kids rushed to the courtyard. From the sky, Mario and Luigi came flying into the bushes close by. It looked like Mario´s Pad was wrecked.

Mario: Ohh... mammamia!

Luigi: ...

The kids ran towards their mortal enemies.

Larry: The Mario Bros.!

Mario and Luigi opened their eyes and sat up. They looked dizzy.

Lemmy: What happened?

Mario: Our-a house was-a destroyed by-a Cruelex guy.

Luigi: I´m so-a scared!

Lemmy: What? We were attacked by Cruelex too!

Mario: I´m-a dizzy! Who are you?

Lemmy: I´m Lemmy.

Mario suddenly came to his senses.


Lemmy froze the Brothers with his Freeze Gun.

Ludwig: We must get them to a place where Bowser cannot see them.

Wendy: WHAT? The first time we capture ´em and we must hide them?!

Ludwig: The Marios will be a nice addition to our forces if we are to defeat Cruelex.

Iggy: I agree!

The Koopa Kids took the Mario Bros. to the dungeon and bound them with chains so that they could talk in a
civilized manner.

Mario: Get me-a out of-a here!

Luigi: Mammamía! I´m-a scared!

Lemmy: We need your help to beat Cruelex.

Ludwig: He is the common enemy and we will only have a temporary alliance.

Mario: Ok.

Luigi: Just get me out of-a here.

Iggy: Well, that was easier than I had expected.

Wendy: But how are we going to defeat him?

Lemmy: We must strategize a plan!

Mario: We-a jump on his-a head!

Ludwig: I´m afraid that will not be enough, my temporary friend.

Lemmy: Cruelex said he would start with Roy´s land but he wrecked the Marios' place first. I wonder if he´s gonna attack Sky Land...

Luigi: There is only one-a way to-a find out! Lets-a run to-a Sky Land!

Wendy: No dummy! We have doomships, remember?

Luigi: Oh! I-a forgot that!

Larry: Let's fight him in Sky Land!

Iggy: I agree!

Everyone got on their doomship.

Ludwig: Some plan...

When they got to Sky Land, they saw that Cruelex was wrecking havoc with the help of a light pink crystal the size of a beach ball that was shooting lasers that destroyed everything.


Cruelex: I shall terminate this place! Feel my wrath!

Cruelex pointed a long fingernail at no one in particular. The doomships had already arrived but no Koopaling or Mario budged. Cruelex stopped throwing blue energy balls. He turned around slowly to face the doomships behind him.

Cruelex: So! The ¨heroes¨have arrived! Good! Now I shall have the pleasure of killing royalty and heroic plumbers!

Cruelex shot a massive plasma ball at Iggy´s ship and blew it into a million pieces. Iggy was sent flying into the distance.

Iggy: WAAAAHHHH! <ding>

Iggy dissapeared in a star in the distance, Super Smash Brothers Melee style.

Cruelex: Too bad it wasn´t a slow painful death.

Suddenly a great anger seemed to well up in Lemmy.


Lemmy got out of his doomship and started firing his Freeze Gun uncontrollably. Many shots hit Cruelex.

Cruelex: Pitiful mortal fool! Your mere toys cannot hurt me!

The pink crystal gave out a massive flash of light. Suddenly they were transported to a very dark room.
Lemmy saw that the only ones there were Ludwig, the Marios, and himself.

Cruelex: You are chosen to fight me in here, for my real plan is much more evil than what you could ever
imagine! I cannot let you interfere!

Cruelex: Attack me if you dare!


Lemmy clawed at Cruelex and, to his amazement, Cruelex was damaged. Mario and Luigi jumped on him repeatedly. damaging him also. Then Ludwig blew fire on Cruelex but to no avail.

Ludwig: I have come to the scientific conclusion that elemental attacks do not damage him!

Cruelex: Fools! You shall never defeat me!

The pink crystal shot blue sparks that electrocuted Luigi.


Cruelex raised his arms and shot a massive fire ball at Lemmy. Fortunately for Lemmy his magic ball absorbed the hit but popped in the process.

Lemmy: I hate fire!

Lemmy´s speed had decreased dramatically due to his ball incident. Ludwig jumped on the hovering crystal, clawing and biting. The crystal was as hard as a diamond. The Marios continued their attack. The pink crystal was having a hard time with Ludwig on top of it. Cruelex raised his arms.

Cruelex: One more time!

Lemmy saw fire forming in his hands. He thoguth he was done for and shut his eyes hard. He could only hear faint noises and then he felt a terrible heat.


Lemmy opened his eyes and saw Bowser standing in front of him, blocking the ball of fire.

Ludwig: King Dad!

Mario and Luigi: BOWSER!

Bowser: I will not let you destroy Plit!

Lemmy: B... B... But how?

Bowser: It´s not important!

Cruelex: WHAT?

The room seemed to waver a bit like when there is a lot of heat. Then they were transported to outer space but they stood there like if they were on the floor. Lemmy saw how huge Cruelex was. Cruelex was three times bigger than Bowser. Then a huge bolt of lightning struck Bowser. Bowser turned white and increased dramatically in size until he was about the size of Cruelex and looked more menacing and tough.


Lemmy stared, mouth open, at Giga Bowser. Ludwig was still struggling with the crystal and the Marios were gone.

Cruelex: You shall not stop me, Giga Koopa! I am matter, I am antimatter, I consume time as well as Culex can!

Cruelex and Giga Bowser started struggling fiercely. Lemmy stared wide eyed at the great beast his father
was. The crystal wanted to attack Giga Bowser but Ludwig wouldn´t let it go.

Lemmy: I must help somehow!

Lemmy's resolution echoed throughout space.


Lemmy: WAAAHHH!!!

Lemmy Koopa sprang up from his bed. Sweat filled his forehead. He was on his comfy bed in Castle Koopa.

Lemmy: W-what?! Invasion! Plit! Crulex! … Giga Bowser!!!

Lemmy wanted to stay in his bed forever. He wanted to think it was all a dream. But it was all so… so real. He had had dreams that were quite realistic, but this was different, much more than a simple dream. He leapt onto his ball and walked (rolled) to the halls. Everything was normal, Ludwig shut in his room, Morton giving speeches to everything he saw, Roy "playing" with Iggy, Iggy receiving  a severe pounding, Wendy thr-

Lemmy: Iggy!!!

Lemmy was ecstatic to see Iggy. He thought Iggy was dead.

Iggy: Hey, you seem like I died and suddenly reappeared again.

Lemmy: You did!

Roy: So, party boy! You come for a beatin´ too?

Lemmy: Uh, no thanks?

Roy: Too bad! Whamo!

Lemmy: Ugh!!!

Lemmy and Iggy ran away from Roy and hid in the attic.

Lemmy: Same ol´ bully.

Iggy: …

Lemmy: Well, I think we lost ´im.

Iggy: Indeed.

Lemmy: Huh?

Iggy´s eyes glowed a pale red.

Iggy: You think it is over, Koopa, yet you cannot see the inevitable. The inevitability of my complete wrath.

With that, Iggy turned and walked off. Lemmy knew exactly who it was and, terrified, he fainted on the spot.


Lemmy Koopa woke up to the sound of crickets chirping. He was in the attic. He thought about what Iggy said. This couldn´t be a joke. Lemmy walked off from the attic. He looked at a grandfather clock in the hall and saw it was 11:00. Everything was very dark and gloomy. He walked past Ludwig's room, it was quiet. He walked past Morton´s room, it was quiet. He walked past Iggy´s room, it was quiet. He walked past Larry´s room, and heard strange noises coming from inside, like the ruffling of paper. Lemmy pressed his ear against the door and heard a strange murmuring voice from inside. He tried the knob carefully and silently, it turned. It was then he realized how terrified he was. He thought there was nothing to fear, yet the feeling did not leave him. The young Koopaling gathered all the courage he could muster and turned the knob. He then pulled slowly, very slowly. Inside, he saw Larry Koopa sitting on his desk with his back turned to Lemmy. The lights were turned off and only the moonlight gave a small brightness through the window, still, it only made the room more terrifying. Lemmy quietly walked towards his sibling. Then, Larry whispered something very, very quietly. Just enough for Lemmy to barely make out what Larry was saying, something so terrifying, that Lemmy would have fainted again on the spot.

Larry: My dominion is almost complete, Koopa, yet you come back… you are powerless to stop me.

Larry did not turn around. Lemmy was completely terrified and wanted to scream, but no sound came from his vocal chords. He just slowly turned around and noiselessly made his way to the door. He slowly and quietly closed the door then raced across the hall and into his room.

Lemmy: *pant… pant… wheeze*

Lemmy Koopa jumped onto his bed and pulled the mattress over his head, then entered a deep slumber.


Lemmy woke up next day in his bed. He looked out the window and it was night. He looked at his clock and it read 7:00. He then walked down the hall towards the throne room. It was gloomy and deserted. He was scared but did not know why. Actually he did know why.

Lemmy: What's happening to me?

Lemmy made his way towards Bowser´s room. Bowser would be hopping mad, but something, an unknown force seemed to pull him towards that part of the castle. He entered King Bowser´s chamber. But the Koopa King wasn’t there. Instead, Clawdia was staring through a window. Lemmy walked to where she was.

Lemmy: M-mom?

Clawdia: Yes, dear?

Lemmy: Why is it so dark, if it´s only 7?

Clawdia: It´s alright, dear, soon we will all be united under his rule.

Lemmy: W-w-who?

Clawdia: I´m sure he will be a fine leader.

Lemmy: Who?

Clawdia: It is only a matter of time, before his dominion is complete.

Lemmy: WHO?!

But this time, he got no answer. Clawdia only stared into space at the window. Lemmy backed away and ran back to his room. In his room he saw Lemmy playing with some toys.

Lemmy1: What the?!

Lemmy2: I wanna join a circus.

Lemmy1 ran at high speed towards the castle´s door and sped off into the night. He was running at high speed towards the Mushroom Kingdom.

Lemmy: This… can´t… be… happening!

Then Lemmy hit a sharp twig and it popped his ball.

Ball: POP!

Lemmy: AUGH!

Lemmy stumbled towards his destination. He didn´t know what he was doing, but if his home continued to be the infernal place it was, then… it would be better to be with the Marios. As he ran, he thought back on the couple of days since the-

Lemmy: AUGH!!!

Lemmy had stumbled on a tree root. He looked at his bleeding toe. He tried to get up but it seemed like the gravitational pull had just gotten six times stronger. He tried pulling himself towards his goal, but his arms were, to his amazement, numb.

Lemmy: WHY ME?!

Lemmy then heard the wind howl, the rustling of a tree´s leaves, and a strange voice behind him.

???: Why me, eh? Well, Koopa, you may not notice it, but  my complete dominion is a plan that involves much more than the traditional ways you are familiar with.

Lemmy very well knew who it was. That "well, Koopa" was unmistakable. But he turned around nevertheless.

Lemmy: CRUELEX!!!

Cruelex: Your life has ended, Koopa
As well as your hope
You shall suffer
And then you shall see
The clear definition
Of torture and pain!

Lemmy´s mind raced, it seemed like he couldn´t move any part of his body. He thought he would die, so he asked a question to delay his fate.

Lemmy: What will you do to me? Just shoot me?

Cruelex: Alas! My method of torture it is not. It would be far too easy on you. For you do not know, you are already doomed. Doomed to stay in a realm where night prevails for all eternity, doomed to stay in a realm where you are nothing. For you are slowly withering away to nothing.

And at that Cruelex disappeared. Lemmy thought about what was just communicated to him. Maybe Cruelex was right, all the people he had talked to seemed almost spectral, and there even was another Lemmy in HIS OWN room! Maybe the other Lemmy would take his place as King Bowser´s son! NO! Lemmy got up. His energy was back, and he raced towards the Mushroom Kingdom. He had complete control to run off to any part of Plit. He wanted to see if all of Plit was consumed in this wretched state. He had a hard time walking but he didn´t care. Soon he was in front of Mushroom Kingdom’s gates. The gate was completely totaled except that one of the gate´s doors was barely hanging by a thread on the hinge. As Lemmy walked over to it, it fell with a clang. The place was deserted and the only different color from the blackness of the night was the dim red of the land. It was a barren wasteland. At Lemmy´s right he saw the Marios´ pad, the house where his former enemies lived. The house was a pitiful sight. It was burned to a crisp, to a sickly brown. Lemmy decided to check out the little house on his right, the Marios´ house. He stopped at the door. The house´s roof had a large hole. The door was so burned and rotton that a young Goomba would have been able to make it fall with a kick. Lemmy´s hand trembled as he reached for the doorknob. He turned it slowly and the door just fell off.

Lemmy: Oops…

As Lemmy saw the inside of the house his eyes widened. Inside was a small kitchen, with small table with two chairs, and on those two chairs were a red and a green figure. Lemmy´s eyes widened even more. Their clothes were burned, but it still had a hint of their trademark color.

Lemmy: M-Mario?

Lemmy stepped closer to the two zombie-like figures. They were indeed Mario and Luigi.

Mario: Must… have… -a lasagna…

Luigi: And if you refuse we shall… take it… by… force…

Mario: For he is… the supreme… ruler…

Lemmy did a double take. This was unbelievable. With fear in his eyes, he dashed out the door. The figures were not following him, but he was scared nevertheless. Meanwhile, in a huge gloomy castle barely eight miles away from Mushroom Castle, Cruelex was watching Lemmy from a crystal ball.

Cruelex: Pathetic, is it not?

His reply came from a chained figure behind him.

???: Leave the poor kid alone!

Cruelex: Since when do I follow your orders, Geglash?

Geglash: Leave ´im alone! He’s innocent!

Cruelex: Do you not remember? In my rule, Innocence is a petty crime.

Geglash: ”%&!

Cruelex: And I have not hurt him one bit. I never will. After all, you know I am a peaceful sort.

Geglash: Peaceful my !&($·! You know that you never hurt physically. You hurt emotionally. ”$&&$!

Cruelex: My, dirty language, hm? Perhaps you need some more of you-know-what.

Geglash: No! I´m sorry! Don´t! Anything but that!

Cruelex grabbed some different herbs and ground them all, then dumped it all into a bowl of steaming water. The water turned a sickly yellow, creating a potent drug. Then he pulled it close to Geglash´s nose. The stench was incredible.

Geglash: NOoOoOoOoOOoOOO! 0_0!

Cruelex continued watching his crystal ball and left Geglash.

Geglash: I´m so high! 0_0

Back with Lemmy…

Lemmy:This place stinks!

Lemmy walked a few paces before he realized how hungry he was.

Lemmy: Ugh! I gotta get back to Castle Koopa for some food.

And he did. He was awfully tired from his long trek, so he entered and went straight for the kitchen. In the kitchen he looked all over the place for food but to no avail. Then behind him came a voice that made him jump. He spun around to look at a hologram of Kamek.

Kamek: Lemmy, do not feel you are the only one to have this awful fate… Every one of us is in a nightmare of his own… brzzt! I have enough power to communicate to you… we must destroy Cruelex, but for some BRZZT reason, we are very close to each other… brzzzzt! Please, I am imprisoned in a cell in Brrzzt the fortress of KRZZT Mega Sledge krzzt Brother bzzt looks like some fortresses sprung up from brzzt nowhere. My guess krzzzzzzt is that they follow Cruelex. BRZZZZT! Cruelex never has minions but I BRZZZT guess they got him in a good mood and he told them they could KRZZT stay. Warp pipe BRZZZT in KRRZZT  Mario house BRZZT toBRRRZZZZT fortress BRZZT please BRZZZ save BNZZZT m- KZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZTT!!!

And at that the Kamek hologram disappeared. Lemmy knew exactly what to do. He understood Kamek very well in spite of the technical difficulties. Lemmy went back to his room to get a spare ball. He mustered courage and entered his very dark room. Inside was Lemmy2. Lemmy1 just went into his closet to get his green ball with a star in the middle. When he was about to exit he shouted.

Lemmy1: Get outta my room!

Lemmy2 ignored him. So Lemmy1 just walked (rolled) off. He made his way to the Marios´ house. Inside he just tried to ignore the two very scary looking people.

Lemmy: I wonder where this warp pipe could be…

He walked to the Marios´ bedroom. Inside he saw a bunk bed and a piece of the wooden floor which was a bit different than the rest of the floor, so Lemmy opened it up. Inside he saw a green warp pipe.

Lemmy:This is it!

The young Koopaling jumped into the warp pipe, and in seconds he was in a big field. In front of him was a huge fortress and he knew exactly what it was. He tried the big knob, half expecting it to be locked, and it was.

Lemmy: Drat!

He circled around the fortress and at the back came by a loose block. He thought it might work so he pushed it with all his might. It didn´t budge. He tried again and it again and again, but he only managed to move it one millimeter.

Lemmy: Roy would be able to push this darn thing. UGGH!

Meanwhile, from the top of the fortress a mysterious figure was watching Lemmy´s every move.

???: Meeheeheehee! Let´s see if he can withstand the wrath of Bullet Bull.

Lemmy was pushing with all his might. Suddenly, a part of the fortress opened and closed very quickly just as a huge bull three times the size of Lemmy came out. Lemmy did not notice it. The bull immediately charged head-first at the Koopa Kid. It wasn´t until Lemmy heard a low pitched sound that he jumped two meters high into the air.

Bullet Bull: MOOOO!!!

Lemmy: YELP!!!

The bull came running up to Lemmy just as Lemmy jumped and successfully popped his ball.

Ball: POP!

Then the bull hit head-first the block Lemmy was trying to push. WHAMMO! The block was shattered into pieces. The bull´s horns were ruined and he looked like someone who just had had an overdose of drugs as it fell on the ground for a loooong slumber.

Lemmy: Whoa. That was scary. Oh yeah. The wall is crumbled, now I can go in.

Lemmy Koopa walked off into the darkness that was the fortress in search of Kamek.

Read on!

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