Misty: Is it over yet?
Videogamerpat: No, there are two more levels.
Misty: No, no, the contest!
Videogamerpat: It can be over anytime you want it to be. Just ask us all to vote you off.
Misty: Oh, I don’t want that, I just want to win and go home!
Rachelle, Co-Webmaster: I’m still trying
to figure out why the cameras avoided me for much of the last three
days... I mean, I wasn’t wearing my
birthday suit... Okay, maybe you can say I always am, but seriously, there
wasn’t any reason to stay away from me...
Guest256, Spiky Rock: I can’t figure
out what’s taking so long. Why can’t the Troopas just surrender? They
know we’re going to constantly beat
them!
Arim: Any chance of us getting a good reward this week?
Lemmy: Are you kidding? The entire purpose
of this show is to make us suffer as much as possible without
us being able to sue in return!
Koshi, Fruit Freak: I’ve just realized how unfair this show is!
Stupid Cameraman: How is it unfair? Little or poor food? Poor places to sleep? Stupid challenges? The fact that Roy Koopa is somewhere else on this island?
Koshi, Fruit Freak: No. I always have to wait for everyone else to talk before I get a line in!
Rachelle: Is today reward challenge day?
Guest256: Does it make a difference?
Rachelle: No, but...
Arim, Goomba-Hater: I’ve started to
wonder why we kind of just go on and on, talking about nonsense. My
theory is that we’re just trying to
take up space and prevent this from becoming a completely boring and
pointless show.
Stupid Cameraman: Don’t forget useless...
Arim, Goomba-Hater: I was just getting to that!
Troopa Mass
Vapor: So, anyone have an idea how to get out of this mess?
Dane Petersen: We can always just walk out the back...
Vapor: No, I mean this immunity mess!
We’re down by two, and that means we’ve got to win two in a row for
any chance of coming back!
Bowser 52589: I have an idea! Let’s just have some kind of pep talk before the immunity challenge, get it on tape, and then we’ll have to win. The producers can make more money and get better ratings that way!
Lord Seth, Interviewer Extraordinare: Things aren’t going right, and we’ve got to try to get things turned around, right now. It’s going to be tough, although it is yet still possible.
Simon, Interviewer: The Mario Madness rule better come into play now...
Stupid Cameraman: What’s the Mario Madness rule?
Simon, Interviewer: Remember how in every multi-mini-game series, it would always be tied going into the last series? That’s how it should be for us, too.
Koopa Mass
Lemmy: Anyone have any idea why there are giant rocks flying this way?
Misty: Giant rocks?
Guest256: I don’t see any.
Koshi: You must have got ahead of the script!
Videogamerpat: Don’t use that joke again.
Arim: Yeah, that joke does get annoying-
CRASH!!!
Rachelle: Maybe Lemmy wasn’t ahead of any script...
Lemmy: If that rock comes any closer, it will completely wipe out and destroy your games. Not like that’s a bad thing, because I won’t be able to take another minute of that Pokémon Snap music!
CRASH!!!
Misty: Our games!
Videogamerpat: Even worse, I set the Super Mario All-Stars cartridge over there! If Crazy Packers Fan finds out, he’ll vote me off himself!
Guest256: No, it’s not over there. Rachelle stole it for no reason at all.
Rachelle: Yes, there was a reason, because I didn’t want the rest of this mass to-
CRASH!!!
Arim: Uh, anyone feel like running?
Koshi: No, but...
CRASH!!!
Koshi: Run!
The Koopa Mass takes off into the thick
woods, while off into the distance, a gigantic Clawgrip can be seen
chucking enormous rocks that hold up
hillsides. Speaking of those hillsides...
Troopa Mass
Lord Seth: There goes everything!
Simon: All of our food, hammocks, and shelter, all destroyed at once!
Vapor: I never thought we’d just see our surroundings just suddenly collapse on us!
Bowser 52589: This is getting out of
hand! I say we just go try to find those Koopalings and start the
reward challenge right away!
Dane Petersen: Why do that?
Bowser 52589: Simple. We waste some time at the challenge, then...
Vapor: Then?
Bowser 52589: Never mind what I was
talking about! We’re going to have to be searching for a new camp! I
always liked our camp, too.
Lord Seth: Well, it was originally the Koopa camp...
Simon: But even before that, it was a camera camp...
Dane Petersen: By the way, Simon, does that thing about to step on your head look like a Clawgrip?
Simon: It’s time for a very intellectual response...
Dane Petersen: What’s that?
Simon: Run!
Bowser appears.
Bowser: Wait!
Bowser 52589: So, it’s you, Bowser!
Bowser: So, it’s you, 52589!
Bowser 52589: I’ve always wanted to have this opportunity... destroying you on television!
Bowser: I don’t think so!
Bowser 52589 and Bowser charge at each other, then get into a ridiculous wrestling match.
Simon: I’ll help you out, 52589!
Simon tries kicking Bowser’s head.
Bowser 52589: Ouch!
Simon: Ah, I love doing that!
Roy appears.
Roy: Wait!
Lord Seth: Is it time for us to be rewarded?
Roy: Maybe not you, but yes, it is time for the reward challenge! Come with me!
Reward Challenge
Roy leads the Troopa Mass and the still-wrestling Bowser 52589 and Bowser to the reward challenge grounds. The Troopa Mass sees a tied-up Koopa Mass being brought in by Larry.
Lemmy: You’re getting frozen after this show, Larry!
Misty: I don’t like lassos anymore, not like I ever liked them before.
Guest256: Here’s what I say: What are
the chances of Larry meeting us in the woods, then just throwing out
a lasso and getting us all tied up?
Crazy Packers Fan: Who cares how you
guys got here, what matters is that you’re here and it’s time for the
reward challenge. You may have noticed
some Clawgrips around here; they’re here on an all-out destruction
quest. They want to destroy this Sub-con
Park Island. Nothing major, of course.
Rachelle: Of course.
Crazy Packers Fan: So we’ve got some sarcasm here? I expect it, as it’s been so long...
Bowser 52589 and Bowser finally stop their wrestling, with neither winning.
Bowser 52589: I’ll win next time!
Bowser: We’ll see...
Videogamerpat: What are we winning today? I really want a reward!
Crazy Packers Fan: You’re playing for
a choice of three things: a chess set, a checkers set, or a Game Boy
Color for each of you, with your choice
of a game.
Lord Seth: Why not Game Boy Advance?
Crazy Packers Fan: The answer you’re probably expecting is that we ran out of money. No, it’s because I’m not that great of a fan of the Advance’s game selection, so why mess up your Game Boy Color’s better games with the bigger screen?
Vapor: Just get things going!
Crazy Packers Fan: Anyway, you’ll be
going up against these gigantic Clawgrips here, trying to take them out
by throwing rocks at them. Whichever
team takes out more Clawgrips in five minutes wins! Also, two Koopa
Mass members must sit out.
Rachelle and Videogamerpat: We will.
Crazy Packers Fan: Okay. Pick up your rocks, and begin!
The rocks are so heavy, no one can pick them up except for Lord Seth and Bowser 52589. They, however, cannot hit the Clawgrips, who are too far away from their throws. After five minutes...
Crazy Packers Fan: After five minutes,
the game is still tied, 0-0! It’s sudden death overtime now! Whoever
takes out the first Clawgrip wins!
Two hours later...
Crazy Packers Fan: Okay, I’ll make it easier. Whoever throws the first rock wins!
Lord Seth heaves a rock, taking out a Clawgrip.
Crazy Packers Fan: The Troopa Mass wins the reward challenge! So, which do you want of these three?
Bowser, in his normal stupidity, decides
to walk right into the table with the chess set, checkers set, and
Game Boy Color on it. As a result,
the chessboard goes flying, right to Bowser 52589’s feet.
Crazy Packers Fan: The chessboard? Then the chess set is yours!
Troopa Mass: WHAT?!
Bowser 52589: We want the Game Boys!
Crazy Packers Fan: Sorry, the first choice is the one.
With some snickering, Koopa Mass walks
back into the woods, while Troopa Mass grabs their chess set
in anger and enters their pipe.
Troopa Mass
Bowser 52589: I’m going to get Bowser back for this!
Simon: Even worse, look at our former camp!
Lord Seth: Yeah, it’s completely ruined.
Vapor: We’ll just have to sleep here, outside it for the night.
Dane Petersen: It’s late already?
Vapor: I think time got sped up again.
Dane Petersen: Oh.
Koopa Mass
Guest256: Wait a minute. We’re just going to walk off into the woods, and just sleep here?
Arim: Yeah.
Misty: Sure.
Rachelle: Why not?
Guest256: Just making sure.
Guest256, Spiky Rock: Just making sure that I’m the only one in this mass who has brains, of course.
Day 14
Troopa Mass
Lord Seth, Interviewer Extraordinare:
Every time I think we’re going someplace, we run into an accidental
roadblock, and we’re back to where
we were in the first place. I thought we were tied with Koopa Mass in
members, 6-6, but then we lose on instant
replay. I thought we had a nice camp, but it gets destroyed. I
thought we had Game Boy Colors, but
Bowser ruins that. Can’t we catch a break sometime?
Simon: Okay, I don’t even get how the producers of this show could do this to us.
Vapor: Neither can I. I mean, at least we should have our own camp, shouldn’t we?
Bowser 52589: We wrecked it, remember?
Dane Petersen: True, but we deserve better.
Lord Seth: As long as Crazy Packers Fan is running this show, we won’t be seeing anything “better”.
Vapor: I wish we could just get this
day over with so we can win the immunity challenge! I’d feel a lot
better then.
Dane Petersen, Chao Babysitter: I feel
this show is being run very unprofessionally. Nevertheless, we get
embarrassed in front of millions who
are watching this.
Simon: Hey, maybe if we look long enough, we’ll find a new camp!
Bowser 52589: Like that will happen... Let’s go out and get killed by some gigantic Sub-con creature!
The Troopa Mass heads off into some trees and bushes, before finding... oh, you know what they found!
Simon: Yes!
Vapor: Finally!
Bowser 52589: This is what we needed!
Lord Seth: This is our big break!
Dane Petersen: Great!
Guest256: Uh, hello?
Troopa Mass found Koopa Mass, not a camp.
Misty: Welcome to our part of the forest! Go ahead, take a rock and a Cobrat and enjoy yourself!
Rachelle: Have fun!
Lemmy: Hold on, hold on! This is Survivor, not Sesame Street! What’s everyone getting along for?
Guest256: I’ll be glad to start fighting if you want...
Koshi: Let’s kick them out!
Arim: No, no, misery loves company!
Rachelle: That is true.
Videogamerpat: I’m only talking so everyone gets a line in!
Bowser 52589: Let’s enjoy ourselves, somehow, by playing chess.
Dane Petersen, Chao Babysitter: Fun, fun! Oh, you know what I really mean...
After a few hours of the players throwing
chess pieces at each other (What, you actually thought they played
for real?), the players are tired out,
and no one can blame them.
Misty: Okay, that was stupid.
Iggy appears.
Iggy: I’m so thrilled! I finally got to do something for Survivor 3! Whoo!
The rest of them stare at him in silence.
Iggy: Oh, yeah, the poem.
Everyone Else: THE POEM!!!
Iggy: Yeah, I know it’s an exciting event around here at Koopa Mass. Anyway, here we go...
Across the water your team must go,
There is only one way you can make
it past the flow,
Trouters will jump up and you must
use their heads,
That way you’ll win immunity and your
team won’t be dead.
Lord Seth: Okay, goodbye!
Iggy: Okay...
Iggy leaves.
Lemmy: Did anyone tell him that Troopa Mass was here too?
Vapor: No...
Rachelle: Poor Iggy’s going to be looking all over for you guys! Go tell him!
Simon: Oh, let him go! Roy’s probably the other one who’s off looking for us...
Iggy
Iggy: Where is that Troopa Mass?
A Triclyde jumps out of nowhere.
Iggy: I just had a flashback... and it reminds me of a Scribble called Sub-con Park!
ROAR!!!
Both Masses
Bowser 52589: Don’t tell me the sun’s about to go down and this day’s about to be over.
The sun’s about to... how predictable was this statement?
Rachelle: Does any Koopa Mass member realize we haven’t eaten for... well, a while?
All of Koopa Mass is hungry, almost instantly.
Day 15
Both Masses
Videogamerpat, Social Outcast: How unfortunate
it is that our Koopa Mass is stuck with the Troopa Mass for
this period of time... there’s no time
to talk about strategies. Hey, did I really get the first line of the day?
Misty, Movie-Quoter: It’s been so long since we’ve actually had food, that I think some of us are going crazy. Just take a look at the rest of my mass!
The Koopa Mass members are all sitting still, perfectly fine, not bothering anyone.
Misty, Movie-Quoter: See what I mean!
Lemmy, Clown Prince: I’m starting to
wonder why we even talk on the immunity challenge day before the
challenge. It’s usually just useless
stuff about nothing.
Roy walks in.
Roy: Today’s a sad day for the Koopa world, but it’s time for the immunity challenge.
Guest256: What does that mean?
Vapor: I don’t care. Let’s go!
The Koopas and Troopas take their Bob-ombs and go.
Immunity Challenge
Crazy Packers Fan: Welcome to today’s immunity challenge. Videogamerpat, I request the immunity game be handed back to me.
Videogamerpat: Sure!
Crazy Packers Fan: This game will be
the immunity game this week as well. Anyway, we have to announce the
tragic loss of one of the Koopalings,
Iggy. Our cameras caught a Triclyde attacking him, and that was it for
him, we think. Let’s have a moment of silence.
As if on cue, Iggy comes flying out of nowhere, landing right in the middle of all the players.
Lemmy: Iggy!
Rachelle: You’re alive!
Iggy: What? Just because I decided to ride a Triclyde, everyone gets all worried? Come on!
Crazy Packers Fan: So, as I was saying, today’s a great day! The challenge today is jumping across the river, using the heads of Trouters! The first entire team across wins. Some Troopas will demonstrate.
Eight Troopas start jumping across the river, using the heads of Trouters. Three of the Troopas go under while five make it across, making it over to where the five other Koopalings (besides Lemmy and Iggy) are standing.
Crazy Packers Fan: So, it’s not that
easy, as you can see. Now, two of you Koopa Mass members must stay
behind.
Lemmy and Misty: We will.
Crazy Packers Fan: Okay. As for the rest of you, whichever team gets all their members across the river first wins! The river’s current will take you all the way back to shore, where you’ll have to do it all over again. Survivors ready, go!
Lord Seth and Bowser 52589 take the lead early on for Troopa Mass, while Guest256 leads the way for Koopa Mass. Eventually, four of the Troopas are in the lead, with only Guest256 staying in range for the Koopas. Then...
Dane Petersen: Yikes!
Dane Petersen slips off a Trouter, and
he gets sent back all the way to shore. This allows Rachelle and Videogamerpat
to catch up to Guest256. Guest256, Lord Seth, and Bowser 52589 all jump
off the final Trouter to the finish line. They are followed by Rachelle,
Videogamerpat, Vapor, and Simon. Koshi and Arim
struggle to get off a couple of Trouters
in time, and they are sent back to the beginning through the
current. Dane Petersen starts to get
closer and closer to the finish line, when...
Koshi: Whoa!
Koshi’s Trouter flips him into the air,
going farther than before. All of a sudden, he passes Dane
Petersen, crossing the finish line.
Arim starts to make a comeback as well, as he makes a larger leap, making
up time. At the finish line, it is too close to call from just looking.
Crazy Packers Fan: Another photo finish... Let’s get the choice from Roy and Larry!
Roy: Koopa Mass!
Larry: Troopa Mass!
Crazy Packers Fan: Mr. Game & Watch?
Mr. Game & Watch: BEEP!
Crazy Packers Fan: Troopa Mass wins immunity!
The Troopas start to celebrate, while
the Koopas sit in disbelief. Lemmy and Misty try arguing with Mr.
Game & Watch, but it doesn’t quite
work. Eventually, all of the players who participated jump in the water
and get carried back to the shore, where Lord Seth takes the Super Mario
All-Stars cartridge and holds it high.
Lord Seth: We’re coming back!
Bowser 52589: It’s not over yet!
Crazy Packers Fan: Maybe not, but Koopa
Mass is going to have to stay here, while you Troopas go off into
the woods somewhere. Go away!
The Troopa Mass heads off into the woods, while the Koopas stay where they are.
Lemmy: Here comes some fun...
Crazy Packers Fan throws out a potion.
Crazy Packers Fan: Please, enter the fifth Mass Massacre!
The Koopas all grab their Bob-ombs and enter the door.
Mass Massacre
Crazy Packers Fan: Well, it’s nice for you to join me. This is somewhere you Koopa Mass members haven’t been for nine days, and now it’s time for you to make things a little more even. First, how has it been, all being together for nine days without having to get rid of anyone?
Rachelle: I’ve enjoyed not having to lose any friends, nor having to do these votes.
Lemmy: I think we all like winning,
and finally losing is not what we enjoy. That makes this even harder,
because when we won so often, losing
something by a very close margin is very difficult. We feel like
we’ve lost our invincibility.
Crazy Packers Fan: How has the team chemistry been?
Guest256: Chemistry? That’s science
stuff. If you’re talking about the way we get along, we’ve been fine
lately, but the addition of Troopa
Mass to our camp was annoying. We’re back here again, in the middle of
a sandy shore, away from those Troopa players, and now we’ll be able to
think again. I think winning will be
easier next time with only our own
players being around us.
Crazy Packers Fan: It seems like a huge alliance has formed. Will it be broken tonight?
Misty: I seriously doubt it.
Videogamerpat: I think things will fall apart if we have to vote again next time.
Crazy Packers Fan: Will you guys win next time, forcing the Troopa Mass to disintegrate?
Arim: Of course!
Koshi: Why wouldn’t we?
Crazy Packers Fan: Okay, then, it’s time to vote. If you forgot how to do this, write the player you want voted off on a piece of paper-
Guest256: I think we know.
Crazy Packers Fan: Good. Let’s go!
A Ludwig organ rendition of the Jurassic Park theme starts to play.
Arim goes to vote.
Guest256 goes to vote.
Koshi goes to vote.
Koshi, Fruit Freak: My vote is for Misty Koopa, because I can never understand her when she quotes movies.
Lemmy goes to vote.
Lemmy, Clown Prince: My vote is for Misty. Of all the people in the tribe, you're the one I trust the least. Not only am I never sure who you will vote for, but because you're so nice you could easily slip through to the end. Sorry, but I can't let that happen. Enjoy your vacation off the island.
Misty goes to vote.
Rachelle goes to vote.
Rachelle, Co-Webmaster: My vote goes to Misty Koopa... Misty, I know you tried hard, and I'm not saying you deserve this vote. But you could end up being a large threat later, basically because you're so, well, nice. So... I'm sorry.
Videogamerpat goes to vote.
Crazy Packers Fan: I’ll go tally the votes... and this time, I promise, nothing bad will happen to me!
Crazy Packers Fan goes to get the votes, then comes back with them.
Crazy Packers Fan: As always, once I read the votes, the decision is final, and the player voted out will be asked to hand me his or her Bob-omb, then jump in the jar. The first vote... Videogamerpat.
Videogamerpat: That’s okay, we all know where this vote is going from here.
Crazy Packers Fan: The second vote is for Misty!
Misty: Uh oh.
Crazy Packers Fan: Misty.
Misty: Oh no.
Crazy Packers Fan: Misty.
Misty: Stop it!
Crazy Packers Fan: Three votes Misty, one vote Videogamerpat. You know that when I say this, the deciding vote is next. That means the vote is for... Misty!
Misty: Rats!
Crazy Packers Fan: Sorry, Misty, it’s
been nice having you, but it’s time for you to go. Please hand me your
Bob-omb.
Misty does so.
Crazy Packers Fan: Misty, the mass has spoken.
BOOM!!!
Crazy Packers Fan: Jump in the jar, Misty.
Misty does so.
Crazy Packers Fan: That ought to shake things up a bit... I hope, so we can keep the ratings up. You can head back through the door to reality.
The Koopa Mass members do so, taking their Bob-ombs with them.
Crazy Packers Fan: How was your time?
Arim: Well, it was... How are you out here already?
Crazy Packers Fan: That’s one of the many mysteries of Subspace. See you later!
In the Interview Room...
Misty, Movie-Quoter: Those losers, voting me off! They made a real mistake, they're even weaker, now having voted off the wrong person! Besides, they probably had a "Hate Misty Koopa Club" going on behind my back and planning the day to get me for no real reason like just about everyone else. They're gonna pay real soon and they'll be really sorry...
Who voted for who?
Arim: Misty
Guest256: Misty
Koshi: Misty
Lemmy: Misty
Misty: Videogamerpat
Rachelle: Misty
Videogamerpat: Misty