Super Mario BROTHERS Sunshine

Started by Hip

Pianta Village

Chain Chomplets Unchained

By Trollish Beastfighter

Mario: Hey! You know, the last time we went up to clean the Shine Sprite thingy on that Shine Gate thingy, I saw a warp pipe!

Luigi: You said “thingy” too many times. Anyhow, that must be a new level or something!

FLUDDs: Why don't we go up and look?

The Mario Brothers collect the Rocket Nozzle and blast to the top of the Gate, and indeed find a warp pipe to Pianta Village.

Luigi: AAAAHHH!!! It’s dark! I can’t see! I’m blind! IN FACT, I SAID “AH”! HEEEEELLLP MEEEEEEEEEE!!!

A gust-of-wind-monster-thingy rams Luigi.

Luigi: EEEEEK! GHOSTS! ICANTSEEICANTSEE…!

Mario: You dummy, it is night! For once, me eating carrots has proved me healthier than Luigi!

FLUDD 2 squirts Luigi’s eyes, and this somehow turns on his “night vision”.

Luigi: That’s better. What were we supposed to do?

Mario: Beats me. Besides, how did FLUDD 2 know how to do that?

FLUDD 2: Good programming, I guess.

Mario: I have a question. I get the feeling that “thingy” is referenced a lot, but I can’t tell where.

Oh no! Plothole breach!

Mario: I thought I heard something…

Pianta Woman: MY HANDS! MY BEAUTIFUL HANDS!

Mario: Mario to the rescue!

The Marios rush over to the desperate cry, only to find a Pianta woman complaining about Chain Chomps.

Mario: What happened?

Pianta Man: I’ll explain. This lady over here has three puppies to bathe. In fact, why does she even mention bathtime to them? It only makes them furious. She did the stupid thing of saying that, and dragging them by the tail. They got angry and spewed this burning stuff on her hands. They are on a rampage that even the local Chucksters can’t control…

Luigi: WAIT! What are Chucksters?

Pianta Man: Uh, you’ll understand later. Since you so-called criminals are here (even though I think something fishier is going on), why don’t you guys clean the mess and bathe the puppies in that lake over there?

Mario: If it gets us-a the Shine, then of course!

Mario doesn’t watch where he is going and steps on the red Chain Chomp goop.

Mario: OUCHOUCHOWOW! MY SHOE!

Luigi: Shoes don’t have nerves, you numbskull!

Mario runs around insane because the stuff is burning and, well… smelly… causing it to burn even hotter, so hot he doesn’t notice a Chain Chomplet coming after him.

Mario: Ah! Much better!

Mario reaches the lake, where the Chain Chomplet somehow loses sight of him and continues making its hot puppy mess on the various roads in Pianta Village.

Luigi: Maybe if I squirt the Chomp, that will solve the problem!

Luigi squirts the Chomplet, which starts chasing him, but slows down incredibly with its body temperature lowered. Since the Chomp is still dirty, Luigi tries to drag it by the tail to the lake to clean it off, but the Chomp pulls the other way with its teeth. Luigi’s hands eventually slip and cause the Chomp to go shooting like a pinball into another Chomp. They both get angry and chase Luigi in literally raging hot pursuit.

Mario: Wow! That gives me an idea!

Mario pounds the crates surrounding the lake and grabs the coins within to heal. Mario spies a Chomp, squirts it, and slingshots it into the lake, where it burrows into the sand underwater, turns white, and cools off. Meanwhile…

Luigi: HEEEEEEEEEEEELLLLLLLLLLP MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!

Chomplets: GRRRRRAAUUUUUUF! RAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRR!!!

Luigi starts running to the lake, and the instant he has one foot over the edge, both Chomps bite him, one on his head, the other on both legs. They all fall in, causing the other two Chomps to bury themselves into the sand, cool off, and release a Shine.

Luigi: (inaudibly) @#$%^&*&^%$#@#$%^&*! But wait! Hey! There in an underside to the village! But how did my head poke through the sand and underneath? Must… get… out… to… report… bug… ugh…

Luigi loses a life. Mario grabs the Shine Sprite and returns to the plaza.

Luigi: I hope I never have to deal with Chomps again.

FLUDD2: (whispering) I wouldn’t be so sure, Luigi…

Mario: I’m getting hungry…

Luigi: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!
 

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