Captain Bowser (better known as Captain Koopa) has created a new crew. The Koopa Klan is now his Koopa Krew. Here's a chart for the stuff:
Old Name - New Name
Koopa Troopa - Peg-Troopa
Koopa Paratroopa - Peg-Paratroopa
Goomba - Boomba
Para-Goomba - Paraboomba
Hammer Bro - Patch Bro
Boomerang Bro - Sword Bro
Sledge Bro - Bandana Bro
Shy Guy - Pirate Guy
King Koopa - Captain Koopa
So. You want descriptions? You'll see them as we progress through this story.
Captain Koopa: Really?
That's a random question. Let's get
to the story.
Chapter 1: Toad Town
It's all over the news! The Koopa Krew has robbed the Toad Town Bank and kidnapped the princess.
Yes, now it is in fact up to Mario and Luigi!
Mario: I want to be a pirate!
Luigi: But that will make you bad... won't it?
Luigi: Narrator, can you please let us talk on our own?
Mario: Let's-a go!
Luigi: Okey dokey.
They headed into Toad Town and go to the port... only to see that the ship had left.
Luigi: THEY GOT AWAY!
Whale: Please don't yell. And that's another ship.
Mario: Hey look! The tuna!
Whale: I'm a whale!
Fuzzipede: I hated the time I got swallowed by that tuna.
Whale: I'M NOT A TUNA!
Luigi: Hey! You're yelling, Tuna!
Whale: Can't... take... it... anymore!
The whale shot water at the Mario Bros,
who were were sent flying and landed near a Boomba and
Boomba: We got our name because we have hand cannons strapped to our heads.
Paraboomba: "Boom" is for the sound that is heard when we fire the cannon.
Luigi: Great. Let's fight!
Blast! A Boomba cannonball was fired
at Mario, but he jumped on it. Paraboomba shot one at Luigi but he
Luigi: Mario, keep dodging. I've got an idea.
After minutes of blasting and dodging, the cannons were out of cannonballs.
Boomba: Let's go reload.
Boomba and Paraboomba ran into Toad Town Tunnels.
Luigi: Go after them, we might end up at the ship!
So Mario and Luigi went down the pipe
to Toad Town Tunnels and followed the Boombas. They eventually
went through a pipe that lead to the ship.
Boomba: Drat! They followed us.
Paraboomba: Nice knowing ya. This is THE END!
Mario grabbed Boomba and slammed him
on the ground, then unstrapped the cannon, used it to slam
Boomba's head, and finally stepped on him. Luigi scuttle-jumped to Paraboomba, unstrapped the cannon,
and slammed it on the head of Paraboomba, who lost his wings.
Luigi stepped on the Boomba.
Mario and Luigi: Yahoo! Let's-a go!
They walked over to the ship and were about to hop on when two Bros. came in to stop them.
Bandana Bros: You will never rescue Peach!
Luigi: I just noticed that the exclamation point is used a lot.
Luigi: You see?
Mario: I thought it was exclamation mark.
Bandana Bro 1: Uh... We don't have any weppons, do we?
Bandana Bro 2: No, we don't.
Mario: You spelled weapons wrong.
Bandana Bro 2: That's because he has speech issues.
Bandana Bro 1: I most certainly do not have speech eshoos!
Bandana Bro 2: Hahahahahahaha.
While the Bandana Bros. argued, the Mario Bros. skipped a tough fight.
Bandana Bros: We heard that!
Actually, the Marios were actually just laughing about the argument.
Bandana Bros: Phew.
So the two Sledge Bros. with bandanas
jumped through the air, but Mario and Luigi dodged them before
they landed on them. There was a quake, however, and the Marios were stunned. The Bandana Bros.
grabbed them and starting squishing them, but the Marios' strength allowed them to break out of the
Bandana Bros' hands. The Bandana Bros. chased them, but the Mario Bros. went to a cliff, stepped aside,
Bandana Bros: AAAAAAAH!
The Bandana Bros. tumbled down the cliff
to their ends and the Mario Bros. hopped onto the Koopa Sailor,
Captain Koopa's ship.
Chapter 2: The Koopa Sailor
Mario and Luigi get onboard and start
beating up Peg-Troopas, using their peg-legs to beat them. Soon, the
Koopa Parrot-Troopa flew down.
Koopa Parrot-Troopa: Squawk.
Mario: Give us the key to the prison room.
Koopa Parrot-Troopa: Hello.
Luigi: Give it to us!
Koopa Parrot-Troopa: Squawk. Koopa Parrot-Troopa wanna cracker.
Mario: Will you give it to us if we give you a cracker?
Koopa Parrot-Troopa: Squawk.
Luigi: Give him a cracker.
So Mario gave the bird a cracker. Koopa
Parrot-Troopa dropped the key and started eating his cracker,
while the Mario Bros. took the key and entered the Prison Room.
Patch Bro: You'll never be rescuing Peach!
Patch Bro: Because, you can't open the cell without the key! The Captain has it, landlubber!
Mario: Thanks for telling us.
Patch Bro: Drat. Well, guess what? You'll not be accomplishing that mission without getting the key from me!
Mario and Luigi immediately beat up
the Hammer Bro who had nothing but an eye patch, and took the key.
They entered the Captain's room.
Captain Koopa: Ar! You never be rescuing that landlubbing princess!
Cannon shots were heard from outside.
Captain Koopa rushed out, only to see that the Black Koopa Shell, a
better ship, had attacked and the pirates of the Koopa Sailor were battling.
Captain Koopa: Load the hatches, maties!
The ships got closer, and Mario and
Luigi stole some swords after beating up the Sword Bros, who were
really just Boomerang Bros. with swords. Suddenly, the Koopas took the princess and hopped over to the
Black Koopa Shell, throwing the other pirates onto the Koopa Sailor.
Johnny: Great. Now we're stuck with this pile of junk.
Bandana Red: Captain Johnny Jones, we see Mario!
Johnny: And who's that greenie? Must be his bro.
Bandana Blue: He has an "L" on his hat. I guess his name is Louie.
Johnny: Mario, Louie! What be you doing here?
Mario: Trying to save a princess.
Luigi: My name is Luigi.
Johnny: They took off with the princess.
Mario and Luigi: Aww. Did they take the money they robbed from the Toad Town Bank?
Johnny: Nope, the sealubbers didn't take it.
Luigi: Can we return it real quick and chase after them?
Johnny: I don't be seeing why not. Prepare to set sail!
Luigi: Mario, I noticed you haven't been talking like an idiot as much.
Mario: That's because I took my pills when we got on the ship.
Soon, the Koopa Sailor made it to Toad
Town Port and the Bandana Reds got off to return the robbed bank
money. However, a Pirate Guy, a Shy Guy with a bandana, peg leg, and sword got in their way.
Pirate Guy: Ye not be taking the booty back!
Mario and Luigi: Go on, we'll handle this guy.
They continued, and Mario and Luigi got into a sword duel to prevent the Pirate Guy from stopping them. He was real tricky. He slung Mario's sword out of his hand, but Luigi got the Pirate Guy's sword out of his.
Pirate Guy: Ye not defeated me yet! Me gots a little trick, you landlubbers!
He raised his peg leg and fired cannonballs
out of it like it was a cannon, but the Bros. dodged them and he
soon ran out.
Pirate Guy: I'm off to reload!
He ran over to some cannonballs on the ship and stuck them in his leg, but Mario and Luigi got a cannon and used the cannonballs as their own ammo to fire back.
Pirate Guy: ARR! I'm only a Mechanical Version! Give me a break!
Mario: That explains a lot. I knew Shy Guys weren't THAT tricky.
Mario quickly ran over and got the swords
that had slung out of his and the Mecha-Pirate Guy's hands. He
then stuck them through the Mecha-Shy Guy.
Mecha-Pirate Guy: You've not seen the last of me, landlubbers!
His power went out and Luigi chopped
him to pieces and sold them for a Life Shroom. The Bandana Reds
returned and the pirates and Bros. set sail. Luckily, Johnny kept a Black Koopa Shell tracker with him and
used it. It told them what direction the Black Koopa Shell was heading. They also used a compass. Soon they would catch up to the Black Koopa Shell...
Chapter 3: The Yoshi Tribe Island
Our heroes got off of the Koopa Sailor onto an island to search for the Black Koopa Shell. It appeared that the Black Koopa Shell was on the other side of the Island.
Johnny: Ye search for information while we be going to search for the Black Koopa Shell on the other side of the island. SAIL AWAY!
And so the Koopa Sailor sailed away.
Mario: I wonder why itís called the Koopa Sailor.
Luigi: I guess because that other thing in Mario and Luigi was called the Koopa Cruiser.
Mario: Youíve got a point there, Bro.
A young Yoshi ran up to them.
Yoshi: Yoshi Yoshi Yoshi.
The Yoshi Leader ran up to them.
Yoshi Leader: Sorry. He hasn't learned the English language yet.
Mario: Have you seen a large black ship?
Yoshi Leader: Yeah. It's currently attacking us.
Luigi: Well help is on the way. It just sailed away.
Yoshi Leader: Another ship?
Yoshi Leader: They'll sink it!
Luigi: How do we get on?
Yoshi Leader: Are you CRAZY?
Luigi: They've got a princess. It's important that we get on.
Yoshi Leader: P-p-princess?
Luigi: Long story.
Mario: Just read the first two chapters.
Yoshi Leader: Huh?
Mario and Luigi finally decided to tell him the story. When they were done they walked into the village.
Yoshi Leader: Welcome to Yoshi Tribe Village.
Mario: So how do we get to the ship?
Yoshi Leader: Take our plane. And don't wreck it!
Luigi: Okey dokey.
The two Bros. took the plane and flew over to the other side of the island, where the Black Koopa Shell was firing cannonballs at the island and the Yoshis were firing back. A Peg-Troopa noticed the Bros and fired, causing the plane to crashland on the beach where the Yoshis were battling. Then the Koopa Sailor approached and fired cannonballs at the Black Koopa Shell.
Random Yoshi: You two, get in the cannon!
Mario and Luigi: What?
Yoshi: Get in!
He forced them in and shot them at the Black Koopa Shell. This could have been an advantage if it weren't for the fact that the Koopa Krew got the Bros., put them in their own cannons, and fired them at the Koopa Sailor.
Captain Koopa: And so WE finally win! Narharharharhar!
The Marios hit the Koopa Sailor so hard that a hole formed in the boat, which soon sunk. The shark pirates abandoned the ship. The Bandana Reds looked disappointed for some odd reason, but the Blue Bandanas were more sad than disappointed.
Bandana Blue: We failed.
Johnny: This not be the last of us! Load us into the hatches, mateys!
Johnny: Do it!
The Yoshis fired the shark pirates at the Black Koopa Shell. There were too many of them for the Koopas to grab and fire back, and theur ship was taking some pretty bad damage. Finally the Koopas sailed away. The shark pirates got aboard, only to be taken to a room with the words "Prison Cells" above it.
Mario and Luigi: I guess we really did fail.
After a while, they realized that the ship was headed to an island in the distance.
Random Yoshi: Oh no! That's our neighbor, the Koopa Tribe Isle.
Another Yoshi: Now they are going to attack.
Luigi: I'm furious with the Koopa Pirates! They ruined our way of saving that isle!
Another Yoshi: Well, you could take the Ocean Passage. It's the only ocean area outside of our isle that you can breathe in.
Mario: May we take it?
Yoshi: I have no problem with it.
In that moment, the Yoshi Leader ran to the bros.
Yoshi Leader: YOU DESTROYED OUR PLANE! NOW YOU WILL SUFFER!
Yoshis: Uh oh.
Mario and Luigi: What the Yoshis said.
Yoshi Leader: FACE MY WRATH!
The leader turned into a giant, slimy Yoshi monster. The Bros. used their swords to slice him but the Yoshi Leader Monster seemed to survive them all.
Mario: What are we going to do?
The Bros. got inside the cannons and fired themselves at the leader's head. This damaged him, but also made the Yoshi Leader Monster Angry, causing him to grow.
Yoshi Leader Monster: ROAR!
Mario: If he gets too big, he'll explode!
Luigi: Okay. Let's keep doing that.
And so, they did. When he got as big as possible, the Yoshi Leader Monster started spitting slime at the Bros. Eventually they got stuck and the Yoshis couldn't help because they were stuck as well.
Yoshi Leader Monster: ROAR! YOU BE LUNCH!
Mario: Goodbye, Luigi.
Luigi: Goodbye, Mario.
The Yoshi Leader Monster grabbed Luigi first and ate him, but Luigi crawled out of the monster's mouth.
Luigi: I totally forgot about that Life Shroom! It's thanks to it that we are going to make it.
He helped pull his Bro out of the slime and they ran to the cannons, dodging the slime that the Yoshi Leader Monster would spit out.
Mario: So how did you get out of the slime, anyway?
Luigi: The stomach acid desolved it.
They fired themselves at the monster's head again. The Yoshi Leader Monster got really angry.
The monster exploded and the slime went through the air and landed in the ocean, where it dissolved. The Bros. helped the Yoshis free and they rinsed the slime on them off in the ocean. When they came back, they saw the Yoshi Leader, back in his original form.
Yoshi Leader: I am so sorry! It must have been that cereal being sold by those subspicious-looking fish. They looked like Koopas. I bought it when I went over to the Ocean Passage while we were under attack by the Black Koopa Shell.
Mario: The Koopa Krew must be responsible...
Luigi: So can we take the Ocean Passage to Koopa Tribe Isle?
Yoshi Leader: I don't mind. And don't worry about the plane.
So the Bros. set off into the ocean
through the Ocean Passage, where oxygen moved through. This would be the
Bros' way of helping Koopa Tribe Island.
Chapter 4: Ocean Passage
Mario and Luigi moved through the ocean passage. As they continued, they saw two sharks (Sushis but with Eye-Patches; no new name) were discussing something. The two Bros. sneaked behind a rock and listened.
Sushi 1: I hate it that people think I am like that woman in Paper Mario! I existed before her! And people think of her when we say what our species is!
Sushi 2: Well, let's tell Boss.
Sushi 1: Yeah, King Sushi will know how to handle it.
The Sushis swam away.
Mario: I just noticed how ridiculous the title is.
Luigi: Do you need your Make-you-smart Pills?
Mario: No. I am surprised you don't agree with me about the title.
Luigi: Forget the title! We're supposed to act like we don't know we're in a story!
So the Mario Bros. continued and eventually made it to a strange outpost-like place.
Random Fish: Hey, you're the famous Mario and Green!
Luigi: Well, actually I am-
Fish: I have waited for the day to come that I meet you two! Mario, Green, my name is Josh!
Luigi: Hey, Josh-
Josh: So, you want to know something about the Ocean Passage?
Josh: Okay, if you swim up to the roof of my house, you can see a roof! Hahahaha.
Mario: Anything about the Ocean Passage?
Josh: Okay, when you exit this outpost, you will see caves. It is rumored that sharks live there. On the other side is a Koopa Tribe isle.
Luigi: My name is-
Mario dragged his brother to the entrance of the caves. A whale swam by.
Whale: You'd better watch out for those sharks, man. They've got a pretty hateful personality.
It swam away and the Bros. entered the caves. A shark swam up.
Shark: I am the Sushi king!
Mario: Great, can you get out of the way?
Sushi King: Sure.
After he let them pass, he realized who they were.
Sushi King: Those be the landlubbers Captain Koopa wanted! After them!
All the Sushis started looking in every corner of the cave. A Sushi swam up to the Sushi King.
Sushi: What should we do to make this chapter longer?
Sushi King: Go away.
Eventually, the Bros. were caught and locked up.
Sushi Officer: Muhahahaha. Now we be having ye for dinner tonight!
All of the Sushis laughed and swam away.
Mario: How do we get out of here?
Luigi: Don't you remember how to slip through bars?
Luigi: Well, let's grab that key hanging over there.
Luigi pointed to the key hanging on the wall that was close to the cell. Mario reached for it, grabbed it, and used it to escape from the cell.
Luigi: Now, let's get out of here.
They swam and swam until they got to the top of the caves. They saw the Koopa Tribe isle.
Mario: They need us.
Luigi: Come on!
But the Sushi King got in there way.
Sushi King: You can't go there without a fight! No helping them! The Captain must rob them!
Mario: So you're working for Captain Koopa, aren't you?
Sushi King: What did you expect? I am the annoying shark that obeys Captain Koopa. Now, Bloopers are headed this way and will attack.
Several Bloopers floated up from nowhere. The Marios were swimming around trying to escape when a Blooper grabbed them.
Blooper: I can get you out of this mess. Just defeat the Sushi King for me.
So the Blooper got them out of "this mess" and then the Sushi King swam up.
Sushi King: So are we swimming or floating?
Mario: I don't know. Authors never seem to make up their minds.
Luigi: Sushi King, we must defeat you.
Sushi King: Why?
Luigi: I don't know.
Sushi King: Well, what are we waiting for?
So the battle began. The Sushi King tried to chomp the Bros. while they got out their swords and slashed him.
Sushi King: These battles make me bored. Can't we just sign a truce?
Mario: I would, but we made a deal with a Blooper.
The Blooper swam by.
Blooper: You call that a fight? You should be getting Bloopers to come attack him!
The Bros. went and told several Bloopers to go attack the Sushi King, and they did. Eventually, he got tired of it.
Sushi King: OKAY! I GIVE UP! YOU DEFEATED ME!
Mario: Not really.
Sushi King: Let's just sign a truce.
So they did and the Sushi King then went swimming away.
Mario: To Koopa Tribe Isle!
The Mario Bros. headed to the island.