The Good, the Bad, and the Torte 3
The Passion of the Chef

By Chef Torte

Chapter 12: Princess Peach’s Plight

The feisty woman that was Tayce T. was shouting orders and calling the shots like a pro just before showtime. The festivities in the Town Square would soon end, and then the Newborn Day ball would be up and the elder chef’s works would be served. Everything seemed to be going well; all of her dishes were coming along in time and everything tasted heavenly. She smiled and thought that she had once again outdone herself. Clasping her hands in front of her, she looked to all her assistants.

“Well gang, I think we’ll knock ‘em dead! There’s no way they’ll leave this party without falling in love with our creations. I couldn’t have done it without you, thank you all so much!”

The rousing reply came expectedly and then the comments about how it was truly because of the head chef herself, which she knew of course in her head and was very conceited about, but knew she needed to be modest to keep up her image. She turned and started lapping up a chocolate-smothered wooden spoon when her thoughts turned to her eternal rival Chef Torte, and how the public would have liked him so much more had he just been more mild and less full of himself, like her. Yes, thought Tayce T, even I wouldn’t have been so bugged by him had he been more pleasant. The chef placed the spoon in the sink and started singing to herself, forgetting all about Chef Torte and his maniacal obsessions and dastardly cakes.

~*~*~*~

After a day had passed, Yoshi had arranged for a trip to the Mushroom capital on the mainland. With little hesitation, he had scored a ferry to escort them to the peninsula off Rose Way, seeing how the citizens of both Moleville and Rose Town had closed off the Pipe Vault ever since a strange troupe of shady individuals had been using it. Suspected to be an area rife with crime and possible danger, the two cities made a firm decision to seal the sewer-link.

The owners of the boat were a pair of local fishermen; one was the Koopa whom Yoshi and Splooshi had kart raced the day past. The second fisherman was a bloated elephant creature known as a Pak E. Derm. Decades ago the Pak E. Derms had been numerous and enlisted in the Koopa army. They were said to be vicious adversaries of the Yoshis of Dinosaur Land, but there seemed an insignificant amount of hostility, if any at all, between this particular being and the Yo’sters of the island.

Jolly, the elephant fisherman, was a delicate pink in skin and wore large trousers below his torso. His only other item of clothing was his fishing hat, which had many lures and tassels on it. The portly, pink pachyderm looked out at the falling sun and trumpeted with his long, snake-like trunk. The loud airing caused Orchil and Splooshi to laugh from a nearby location. The pair of blue sat cross-legged and played a game of cards next to the large chest they had discovered. Splooshi had taught the young, redheaded girl how to play card games, but the fast learner that Orchil was soon schooling her good friend in every game they played.

“I win again, Splooshi,” Orchil taunted.

“Aw geez, you hadn’t played cards until two months ago and now you always win. That’s not fair!” Splooshi complained.

“Tough luck, pal, but that’s the way the petals bloom,” Orchil snickered, gathering the cards into a neat pile. “Oh, Yoshi, wanna play with us?”

The green dinosaur who had strolled over shook his head but did sit down with his friends. “I’m not in the mood, but thanks.”

“What’s up, then?” Splooshi asked.

“Well I was just thinking about what we’re gonna do when we arrive at Rose Way,” Yoshi explained. “The chest was hard enough to get on the ship this morning, there’s no chance we’ll be able to lug it up any beanstalks at Land’s End, or even up the cliffs to Bean Valley. It’ll be hard to take it anywhere since it’s so heavy.”

“So, what are you saying?” Splooshi questioned.

“I’m not sure, I’m thinking it’d be best to go to Toad Town to see a man named Russ T. He might know something about this, and the strange carving with Mallow. Besides, it’ll give us a chance to see the princess, Luigi, and everybody else.” Yoshi looked to the shore that was still hours away. “It’ll be the dead of night when we get there, and I’m not sure what we’ll do for transportation…”

“Oh!” Orchil exclaimed. “Couldn’t we just ask Jolly and Verne to take us all the way to Toad Town’s harbor?”

“No good, I already tried, even offered more money,” Yoshi stated. “They need to get back by tomorrow and that’d add a day and a half to their schedule.”

“Hmm, is there anyway we could get that guy to come to us?” Splooshi asked.

“Probably not, though that might be what we end up doing. We’ll just have to hide the chest somewhere in Rose Way and get to Toad Town as fast as possible on foot, and then take him back to where we hid it,” Yoshi answered.

“Sounds like more work than it may be worth…” Orchil commented.

“Yeah, it’s a lot of travel, but this could be important. Besides, we’ll get a nice reunion out of the deal,” Yoshi replied.

“All right, sounds good,” Orchil said.

“Yeah,” Splooshi agreed.

Yoshi stood up and scanned the area. “I’m gonna go sleep for an hour or so, wake me if I’m not up by the time we get there. Oh, and keep an eye out on tweedle-dee and tweedle-dum over there.”

Splooshi and Orchil smiled and said goodnight to their green friend before returning to their card game.

~*~*~*~

It was the eve of Newborn and the ball had finally begun. At the beginning of the ceremony the castle Minister made a speech, one that was meant for Princess Peach’s lips. However, the beautiful young lass was far too morose to complete her task and was sighing in her room, refusing to attend the party downstairs.

“What’s the matter, my dear?” Toadsworth asked.

Peach breathed out curtly. “I can’t go down there, I can’t face them right now. I’m very sorry…”

Toadsworth placed a comforting hand on her shoulder. “But why, Princess? What’s making you so upset?”

Peach winced and grabbed her stomach. “I’m sick…”

Toadsworth ruffled his white mustache. “No one just all of a sudden gets sick! Now tell me the truth, young lady!”

Tears started welling up inside the glossy eyes of the fair princess. She wrapped her arms around her legs in a fetal position. “I… I just can’t right now…”

“Something’s on your mind, and the only way you’ll get any better is to talk about it!” Toadsworth claimed. “Come on, why are you sad, Princess? Why are you so reluctant towards Master Stario?”

Peach wiped her face and scoffed. “Stario… it’s him. It’s all his fault…”

“What’s Stario’s fault?”

Peach sighed. “Well, no, nothing. Never mind.”

Toadsworth brushed his lady’s face with his wrinkly hands and wiped away the tears, looking into her violet eyes. “Tell me, please. I want to help.”

“There’s nothing you can do,” Peach explained, turning away from her attendant.

“I must do something!” Toadsworth exclaimed.

“Nothing can be done!” Peach finally shrieked, at her emotional peak. Before Toadsworth could respond, a torrent of words pelted him, revealing the princess’ source of depression to him. Toadsworth tried to find the words to say but looked down and tried to give the princess a hug. “See? I told you, it was hopeless…”

“Princess, why didn’t you tell anyone you were having such depressed feelings about Mario?” Toadsworth asked.

“Well gee, he’s dead, Toadsworth! I think it’d be kind of easy to tell that I’d be upset at that!”

Toadsworth felt like a failure. “B-b-but Princess, you seemed fine after the events… with Stario and all…”

“I didn’t know Stario then,” the Princess explained. “But I do now, and he’s not Mario.”

Toadsworth nodded pitifully. “I suppose you are right, my princess.”

“The worst thing is...” Peach said, gathering her thoughts. “I was fooled by him. I thought everything was fine… I even started to feel the same way, like they were the same person.” Toadsworth watched sadly as his dignified princess completely broke down before him. “I feel like I betrayed Mario, without even realizing it. He died and I went on carefree! What kind of person does that? I’m awful, how could I run the kingdom being such a terrible person?”

“There, there,” Toadsworth hugged Peach. “I’m truly proud of the job you’ve done in spite of everything you’ve lost, your mother, your father...”

“He’s not dead,” Peach said.

“Well, yeah, but… you know…” Toadsworth mumbled.

Peach tried to smile and wiped her glistening face again. “Heh, yeah…”

Toadsworth held her hands and looked into her eyes. “What I’m trying to say is, you more than anyone I know deserve to be happy and carefree. Yet, you so bravely step forward and lead the country in its times of darkness and sorrow like no one else can. There is no one more fitting to be in your shoes than you.”

Peach looked down at her hands that were joined with Toadsworth. “Thank you, Toadsworth… but, I just don’t know what I can do without Mario by my side…”

“We’ve all had that same thought consuming our heads ever since it happened… but we’ve gotten used to Stario, as well, and it seems like he’ll do his best to be Mario,” Toadsworth said.

“Yes but, there are some things he just can’t replace…”

Toadsworth kissed the princess on the cheek. “I’m sorry for that, but I’m afraid nothing can be done about it. It’s hard to lose the ones we love… but when we do, we need to be able to take in the help of the others that love us back and know that those gone still shine down on us and want us to do what we must.”

Peach nearly screamed and looked into Toadsworth’s old eyes. “Oh, Toadsworth, I’m so sorry I didn’t say anything. I should have done so, knowing what happened to your wife…”

The old Mushroomer nodded with a smile. “Don’t fret now, that was years ago. But my point is, I’ve been able to accept the fact that she’s gone and can still step forward to each new day.”

“I’ll get better with time, I promise.”

“I’ll go and tell the Minister not to disturb you for the rest of the night,” Toadsworth said sympathetically.

“No,” Peach exclaimed. “It’s time I took on my responsibility as the princess. I’ll go down and do my job, now.”

Toadsworth smiled with warm eyes. “That a girl. You’ll get through this as long as you don’t forget who you are and the others that still care about you.”

Peach stood up and checked herself in the mirror before turning to her subject and placing her hands together at her waist. “Yes. Thank you, Toadsworth. Now let’s go down to the ball.”

“Yes, my princess,” the butler said, walking before her.

Chapter 13: Kamek Captured

The sky outside the windows of the Koopa Jet II had grown dark with night and filled with storm clouds. Various strikes and flashes of lightning lit the darkness outside, but little could be done to actually see anything. Fortunately the lighting in the aircraft had been semi-completed, and most of the rooms were lit brightly save a few hallways. Bowser stared out the window, his thoughts pouncing around as he looked at the raindrops splashing onto the glass in front of him. His military officer stood behind him, waiting an acknowledgment. The few surviving Troopas had been gathered in this main hall and were stuck very tightly. The room was hot. Bowser watched a bead of sweat trickle down his reflection, thinking it was a raindrop. He turned around and eyed his general.

“My liege, we’ve suffered heavy losses,” General Jagger stated bluntly. “Our surviving numbers are, as you can see, quite limited in range and stand no chance against any offensive or even defensive maneuvers. We have also experienced the loss of our weaponry and transportation, not to mention Kamek…”

The Koopa ran a claw through his fiery mane and brushed his chest, giving a stern look to the soldiers surrounding him. Aside from the pilots and the other troops assigned to current tasks that may be in a separate room, every last one of the remaining army stood in the same room with Bowser, and their eyes and ears were focused on their massive leader. The Koopa King clawed at his neck brace, feeling uneasy. The extra room, though intensely small, would have been nice to use right about now, thought Bowser. Unfortunately Kammy, distraught with emotion, was using it to try to focus her mind with Kamek’s and detect signs of life and any other information she could conjure up.

Jagger continued looking at the silent sultan. “King Bowser? What are we to do?”

“Hack! Hoo! Plahm!” Bowser cleared his throat and shook his head, breathing in for confidence. “It’s indeed quite obvious that vengeance must be sought against these rogues who obliterated our forces behind our shells. The cowards must pay the price, the Koopa Troop will crush them in the times to come.” There was a moment of silence and Bowser frowned. This wasn’t the reaction he was looking for. Now he’d have to say more stuff. “Well…”

“My King, if you do not mind my asking,” Jagger interrupted. “What are our plans of revenge? What can we do against such strong enemies?”

Bowser scratched his chin lightly, contemplating terrible ideas in his head and trying to think of a good lie to get the questions to cease for the time being. He snorted and found himself clueless as what to say.

“Its obvious there is no simple answer…” Bowser explained. “Now if you’ll excuse me, this is growing awkward and uncomfortable.”

Everyone watched quietly as Bowser stomped off with great indignity towards a corner of the room. He snapped his fingers and summoned a pair of strong-looking soldiers to assemble a half-wall of yellow bricks to build a semi-private area that Bowser could barely fit in himself. For the last detail, the Koopa ordered Whomp to act as a doorway and stand away from the room’s interior. Bowser stared in front of himself, looking at the bricks that nearly touched his nose. Boy was it cramped. He opened the Whomp and found Embert standing there.

“You!” Bowser exclaimed.

“Uh, yes, King Koopa?” Embert asked.

“No calls.”

Bowser slammed the Whomp shut and thought hard about what he had to do. He began sucking his thumb and tossing pencils at the ceiling.

~*~*~*~

The six children of the Koopa King gathered in an unlit corner that led to the Koopa Jet II’s storage basement, which was ironically empty. They would have been meeting in the storage room had it not been necessary to fill it with many of the troops already. So they found the small hallway as a sanctum of limited privacy. In the shadows their scaly and colorful faces looked blindly across a horizontal axis, searching for their siblings that they could not see but knew were there.

“I can’t believe the whole army was taken so fast,” Iggy said, shattering the silence.

There was a slight pause. “I know what you mean. We’re supposed to be one of the strongest armies around… and they completely tore us apart!” Roy bellowed. “How dare they blindside us like that?!”

“Just goes to show how weak the Koopa Troop has become. Ever since our first split up I don’t think the army has been as powerful,” Larry commented. “It’s like the threat of our dad and this army is slowly disappearing. Our evil-doings are nothing compared to the new-age villains of today.”

“I’m surprised to hear you say that, Larry,” Wendy spoke up.

“Why’s that?” Larry hissed.

“Our army is still quite admirable, and a dangerous threat to anyone and everyone! Even now with our numbers greatly slashed we’re still a code red alert!” Wendy shrieked. “The only reason those fiends back on the island were able to defeat us was because they were cowards and ambushed us! You be sure that if we had taken them head on, we’d have come out victorious.”

“I wouldn’t be so sure, Wendy,” Larry responded.

“Yeah, their technology was really advanced!” Iggy interrupted. “I don’t think our troops have ever had such cool weapons.”

“Weapons don’t make the strength of the army, Iggy!” Wendy sneered.

“Yeah, it’s the true brute force behind the weapon holder that determines an army’s strength!” Roy agreed.

“Hey,” Bowser Junior commented.

“Roy’s right. Remember when I beat him in that fight? It wasn’t the wand, it was me.” Iggy snickered.

“You shut up, that was dumb-luck!” Roy argued, standing up.

“Hey!” Junior snorted.

“If that’s true, you and my luck have something in common,” Iggy spat.

“I’ll punch your teeth out right now if ya don’t shut it, Ignoramus!” Roy snarled.

“LOOK!” Bowser Junior cried. “Can I just say something here?

“NO!” said the four arguing Koopas in unison.

“Wait a second, Morton?” Wendy called.

There was a low murmur. “… What?”

“Geez, I forgot you were here, Morton,” Larry replied.

“You’ve been awfully quiet,” Wendy commented.

“Sorry…” Morton mumbled.

“Trust me, that’s not something to apologize for,” Roy chuckled.

“Is everything all right, Morton?” Iggy asked in a rather scratchy voice.

“It’s Kamek…” Morton peeped. “If I hadn’t frozen with fright, he never would have been taken by them. I feel so responsible.”

“You have a point there, Morton,” Junior chided.

“Shut up!” everyone else yelled.

“No, it is my fault,” Morton sniffed and rubbed his eyes, thinking since it was so dark the others couldn’t tell. “I’d feel a lot safer if he was here, helping Dad…”

“Yeah, me too…” Larry agreed.

“Hey, you guys…” Iggy said.

“What?”

“Does anyone know what Dad meant earlier? When he was talking to me?” Iggy asked.

The Koopalings shrugged in the darkness. Wendy’s high-pitched squeal responded. “He lost his beanbag chair, I’m sure he was just emotional.”

~*~*~*~

Kamek? Kamek, can you hear me?

Awaken, old fool!

You must respond, please, Kamek…

Kammy grew frustrated and flushed with impatience as her nails dug into the sides of her skull. Her foreclaws pushed so far into her temples they broke the scales and small falls of blood trickled down her cheeks like red tears. Her face wasn’t pale and grimly either, she was flustered with a pinkish hue. Her eyes and teeth clenched together so tightly it was painful, but she needed to hold her concentration. She needed to contact Kamek.

Vermik remained deathly silent, watching her from across the room. He stood near a corner and leaned gently against the cold wall, his feet wrapped around one another and his arms crossed before his chest. The black-clothed Magikoopa studied Kammy’s behavior. He came to the conclusion that the only person Kammy really loved in her life was her elder cousin, despite the resentment and disposition they had for one another. Vermik’s mind danced around many things, about the witch’s poor predicament, his burning hatred for Kamek, how he felt a green fire burning inside him when he watched Kammy. He turned his head away from the female on the single bed, whose legs were crossed and her arms arched outwardly. Staring at a spider’s web, he thought for just a minute how vulnerable the old woman was. A cold smile peeled across Vermik’s sinister face when the eight-legged proprietor of the cobweb came into view and wiggled its free six legs around as it slothfully slid down a rope of its own substances. The darkly dressed mage laid out his hand for the arachnid to climb upon. Its furry feet tickled his palm while comparing himself with the creature.

He crushed it in his hand.

“Ugh!” Kammy moaned, pulling her hands from her head. “I can’t reach him…”

“That’s a shame,” Vermik said, still looking away. His eyes fixated on the green pus spewing out of the cracks in his claw.

Kammy sneered, utterly loathing the sinister warlock.

“So Kam,” Vermik paused, turning his gaze to see her. “Why do you think those ships stopped following us?”

Kammy scratched her snout. “That’s something I, too, have been puzzling over…”

“Is it possible they were simply territorial?” Vermik pondered.

“Possible… but I think it was something else…” Kammy closed her eyes and returned her fingers to her temples. “Perhaps they feared entering something else’s territory…”

Vermik smiled. “You felt that too, eh?”

Kammy smiled but said nothing. She returned her mind’s focus towards her cousin. Vermik stood without a whisper, his mind reaching out and touching her essence. A crude smile appeared on his lips.

~*~*~*~

The rain poured. The Koopa Jet II was soon trapped in a dense whirlwind of a storm. The aircraft’s lack of completion didn’t help as all the searchlights and other sight systems were not available, and what little they had proved useless. Jagger nearly fell on his shell during a brief skirmish with violent turbulence. The overall passenger morale had been grim, but with the incorporation of the storm it was now a pile of ashes where a once roaring fire stood. The general gave what advice he had for the engineers and pilots working, and prayed that they’d make it through the storm. Lightning flashes did not really help the pilots to see but rather made it more frustrating that they had to grasp an image in such a short amount of time. General Jagger wiped his forehead and for a moment believed the rain was coming into the ship. He looked down the main deck and stared into the lone door, where a meeting was being held. He wished to be there, but as one of the only authority figures left, he needed to keep watch over the helm. It didn’t really matter; he had nothing to contribute to his king and fellow advisors. He might as well have died back on the island; his leadership skills were terrible as of late. Jagger’s blurred vision caught a glimpse of something thick and long slithering among the clouds as a bolt of lightning stabbed the ocean outside. He blinked several times and trotted toward the window. Jagger scanned with a fixed, studious look outside the glass, wondering if his eyes had played tricks on him. Again lightning flashed, and he saw a snake-like silouhette curl and spiral like a ribbon in the wind beyond a veil of dark clouds.

~*~*~*~

King Bowser had assembled the other authority figures in the tiny room and sat impatiently on the bed. Admiral Jade stood suit in front of her commander and awaited any orders or questions to be given, she had nothing to say or suggest at the moment. Vermik stood idly in the same corner he had been in the previous hour, his thoughts kept to himself. His presence was a mere rustling of grass or chirping of a cricket. The active sight in the room was the purple-robed Kammy, who paced back and forth down the room, not knowing what to do or how to do fix the situation. She scratched her head and contemplated many things under her breath, wishing she had been able to contact Kamek’s inner mind before succumbing to unconsciousness. Her fists were clenched and her hat was absent, but there was an addition of bandages applied to the sides of her face where her fingers had drilled into her head. Bowser moved up and down on the seedy mattress and grinned at the tinny squeaking noise.

“What are the odds that this giant aircraft that’s completely devoid of any finishing touches or even any adequate features would have a nice and scene-ready bed like this?” Bowser commented. “I mean really, that’s a million to one shot right there! Am I right?”

“Bowser, if you would please, I’m trying to concentrate,” Kammy responded.

“Kammy you’ve already expended too much strength on trying to tap into Kamek’s mind, wouldn’t it be best to relax?” Jade suggested.

Kammy glared at the admiral. “Relax? I’ll relax when I’m dead!”

Jade felt concerned. “But Kammy, we need you alive. If there is a chance to save Kamek, we’ll need your help.”

“Of course you’ll need MY help. You aren’t good for anything besides showing the goods, sister!” Kammy snapped.

Vermik’s eyebrow raised as his eyes scanned Jade up and down behind his glasses after Kammy’s comment.

“What did you say?!” Jade barked.

“You heard what I said, harlot!”

“You wench!”

“Whore!”

“Hag!”

“Hey-hey, cat fight!” Bowser chuckled.

There was a planet-jarring crash that made the entire aircraft jostle up and down violently, but the occupants of the room didn’t notice. Kammy and Jade collided in the center of the room and started clawing at each other. The door swung open and in rushed a concerned General Jagger, but his demeanor quickly changed seeing the two females attempt to rip out the other’s esophagus.

“Ooh, cat fight,” Jagger mentioned, taking an interest quickly.

From the corner, an aroused Vermik shouted a catcall at the two. Jade’s claw tore the material of Kammy’s robe at her shoulder, exposing the hag’s bony arm which she proceeded to smash bluntly into Jade’s snout. The admiral recoiled back a few steps and Kammy pounced on her, tearing her blouse in just the right capacity to expose but not be a censored event. The violent poundings on the ship continued to heighten in sound as the screams of the troops in the next room started picking up.

Bowser smiled. “We’re gonna need a tub of mud in here pretty darn quick!”

As the estrogen-fueled turtles shrieked at each other like demonic banshees and sliced the other’s flesh with bared claws, a loud roar that made one’s stomach float upward and stick to your chest echoed from outside the ship. The Koopas inside the confining room finally took realization of the situation at that point, only too late.

“It’s here!” Vermik shouted.

“What’s here?” Bowser yelled.

“No, this isn’t the one…” Kammy replied.

The ceiling ripped away, and the Koopas were torn from their places and hurled into the air. Through all the violent shaking, Kammy got a glimpse of some massive creature, but she could barely see it in the dark. She lost all track of time, but quickly after being torn she was falling. Falling fast. Then she splashed into the cold depths. Something in the back of her mind was calling to her, something distant. Kammy reached for it but fell short. Her mind clouded over as she sank into the icy waters…

Chapter 14: Changling’s Predicament

Three shadowy figures congregated within a sheltered clearing in a relatively small forest known as the Top Secret Area. Because of its secluded area and little-known existence, it was a prime location for the trio of mischief-makers to discuss their current progress. Two figures stood together, both the complete opposite of the other in size and shape. The third was an antsy, wingless bird that paced around frantically.

“Are you sure this area’s well hidden, Mervo?” asked the floating Shy Away.

The wingless bird, a Pidgit known as Mervo, rotated 180 degrees and locked eyes with the airborne Shy Guy through his thick, reflective glasses with spiral-decorated lenses.

“Absolutely one-hundred percent surely positive we won’t be found by any of the Donut Plains citizens while we’re in here,” Mervo answered in a speedy voice.

“Duh, um, Mervo, where are the donuts?” asked the third figure, a large and round creature known as a Jawful, who carried an unusually oversized fork in his right hand.

“Donuts? DONUTS!” Mervo slammed into Pudge’s chest. “There won’t be any donuts for us after that fiasco back at sea!”

The tiny fairy-esque creature Shy Away rubbed its watering can and asked, “What are we going to do, Mervo?”

“What are we going to do? What are we going to do?” Mervo responded with an eccentric chortle.

“Yes, that’s the question I asked…” Shy Away mumbled.

“I’ll TELL you what we’re gonna do! We’re gonna die! Decease! Demise! Disassemble!!!” Mervo panicked.

“So…” Licking his chops and squeezing his eyes shut, Pudge said, “What you trying to say?”

Mervo ran full speed and slammed into Pudge’s chest, this time knocking the Jawful on his back. The fork in his hand was hurtled from his grasp and zoomed just past Shy Away and smashed into a tree all before the dust settled. Shy Away whistled, looking at the giant food utensil glinting in the sun’s rays pouring from the canopy.

“The Countess is gonna KILL us!” Mervo shouted, ruffling his feathers.

“Oh dear… that’s not nice,” Shy Away commented.

“No, it ISN’T nice, in fact, it’s very, very not nice. Very bad, very bad, terrible, even. Completely in the red, negative to the minimum, quite actually,” Mervo explained.

“Wouldn’t it be negative to the maximum, Mervo?” Shy Away chimed in. Shy Away was met with a glower from the bird.

Pudge stood up, Mervo falling from his perch on the big lug’s stomach. The red creature dusted himself off and snorted, “Why she gonna kill us?”

 The Pidgit leapt in place three times, kicking the dirt with its scaly yellow talons. “We failed in our mission, remember?”

Pudge thought carefully about this for a long time. “Um, no.”

Mervo cried in frustration. “Maybe you’ll recall that the Countess sent us out to retrieve that treasure chest locked in that underwater temple? Ring a bell? Remember how we lost it on the voyage home? How it tumbled over the side and down into the ocean?”

The Jawful belched and scratched his behind. “I’m not too worried about it.”

Mervo shrieked, turning violently red.

Shy Away cocked its head, “Um… Mervo, you’ve got red on you.”

The Pidgit quickly circled the secretive clearing three times, returning to his normal pigment. He breathed heavily after his sprinting and shook himself dry of sweat.

“Feeling better?” Pudge questioned.

“Not at all!” Mervo said rather enthusiastically.

“So… now what?” Shy Away asked.

Mervo sighed. “Well, there’s no hope of salvaging the treasure; it’s long gone at the sea floor by now. I guess we just return home and hope to the Stars Countess doesn’t get too angry.”

“Isn’t there anything we can get her, flowers maybe?” Shy Away suggested.

“No, no, a tuba!” Pudge demanded.

“You know those things won’t make the Countess happy!” Mervo disagreed. “Heh, maybe if we could just bring her someone to divert her attention she’d forget about our mistake…”

“Huh? What do you mean?” Shy Away asked.

“Oh, nothing.” Mervo pondered for a moment. “Wait a minute, maybe that would work… If we can find a nice guinea pig to distract Countess, she’ll be too busy torturing him to focus on us! It’s perfect!”

“But Mervo, where we gonna find a toy store here?” Pudge wondered.

“We’ll have to keep our eyes peeled for the right candidate… maybe we should sneak into town and observe the locals, see if anyone would work out…” Mervo suggested.

“Okay, let’s go!” Shy Away said, flipping in the air and darting off out of the area, to be followed by the other two figures.

~*~*~*~

The city of Glazedon wasn’t much to speak about. It was the second largest village in the Donut Plains and fourth in all of Dinosaur Land, and it was still relatively small, a Rose Town or Koopa Village to the Mushroom Kingdom’s Toad Town. It was inhabited by a few Yoshis and several reformed Goombas and Koopas. Monty Moles weren’t uncommon to pass through the city, either. In fact, one Monty Mole, Maggy the Mail Mole of the western Dino continent, was on a routine delivery.

Maggy shot up out of the ground like a geyser and dusted her long dreadlocks off before replacing her postal hat on her head. She covered her sensitive eyes with a pair of tinted glasses and squinted in the daylight around the town. Across the square she fixed on her target, a brown Yo’ster wearing a hard hat and carrying two long planks of wood in his arms. Maggy wobbled peacefully over to the Yoshi, her beaded dreadlocks jingling as she promenaded.

“Good aftuhnoon, Mr. Moshi!” Maggy called.

The hard-hatted Yoshi glanced at the Mole and set down his load, removing his hat with respect. “Hiya, Mag! How're things going?”

“Oh, y’know, y’know, same ol’, same ol’,” Maggy replied, pulling out an envelope. “Got some mail for you!”

“Wonderful!” Moshi exclaimed, grabbing the letter. “Thank you so much!”

“Oh don’t think nothing of it, it’s mah job!” Maggy replied, turning around and looking through her mail sack.

Just then, a red Yoshi walked through Glazedon’s main archway, entering the village. The dinosaur wore small spectacles covering his eyes and a golden bracelet around each wrist. He walked towards the town square nonchalantly and looked all around. He scratched his chin and turned to a Goomba walking in from the left.

“Oh, excuse me sir!” the red Yoshi asked.

“Mmmyes?” the mustachioed Goomba responded.

“I was wondering if you’d maybe seen a Koopa traveling through here recently. A very eccentric fellow, dressed like a chef?”

The Goomba furrowed his worm-like facial hair, almost hypnotizing the Yo’ster. “Mmmnope, can’t say that I have…”

The Yoshi sighed. “Well, thanks anyway.” He walked forward and met with another villager, this time a fellow Yoshi of orange coloring. “Excuse me, orange-scales! Yeah, you!”

The orange Yoshi turned to the red. “Yes, what is it?”

“You didn’t maybe see a Koopa go by here in a cook’s outfit recently, did you?” the Yoshi asked.

“No, I’m sorry…” the Yoshi sniffed the air, confused. “That’s weird…”

“What?” the red Yoshi said with a sense of fear behind his words.

“Oh, nothing.” The orange Yoshi shook her head and walked along.

The red Yoshi swiped his forehead dry and walked over in the square, discovering Maggy. “Oh! Excuse me!”

“Me?” Maggy asked.

“Yes, you!” the red Yo’ster said. “You’re a mail man… woman… person, whatever, I was wondering if I could ask you…”

“Hey, Red!” the orange Yoshi called from behind, turning the said dinosaur to look. “You weren’t asking about that one guy, that Torte guy? The one who nearly destroyed the Donut Plains?”

The red Yoshi scratched at his neck, his voice cracking. “Um… no, I was talking about another Koopa chef…”

“You’re sure now?” the orange dinosaur asked.

“What, you haven’t seen Chef Torte, have you?” the red Yoshi questioned.

“No, I’s just thinking who you must be if you were looking for him,” the orange Yoshi asked. “But you obviously are looking for someone else, right?”

“Right…”

The orange dino sniffed again, “You know, that’s something interesting… you don’t smell like fresh fruit…”

“I… I don’t?”

“No. You smell like a slimy turtle!” the orange Yoshi accused.

“Who’re you calling slimy?” a Koopa with a blue shell asked.

The orange Yoshi rolled her eyes. “I didn’t mean all Koopas were slimy, I meant THIS guy was slimy… He’s no Yoshi I ever smelled before…”

“Please, I just haven’t bathed in a while is all…” the red Yoshi chuckled nervously.

“Oh, so you’re saying Koopas are smelly?” another turtle asked.

“No! No! Oh… no…” the Yoshi sighed, the villagers slowly forming a mob on all sides.

Maggy squinted and saw the green crystal on the tip of a wand poking out from the Yoshi’s saddle pack. She picked up a rock on the ground between her two dexterous toes and spun around in the air, launching the rock at the impostor. The rock slammed into the Yoshi’s head and in a puff of green smoke, Changling was seen in his true form.

“Good gravy! It’s one of Bowser’s Magikoopas!” the blue-shelled Koopa shouted.

“Invading our poor village!” a Yoshi exclaimed.

“I say we clobber this guy and teach him a lesson!” the angry orange Yo’ster declared.

“N-n-no! Please!” Changling pleaded.

“Mmmtoo bad,” the mustachioed Goomba said.

“He the one?” Shy Away asked.

Standing atop a cliff nearby the village, Mervo peered through his amplified glasses, now extending outward as binoculars, one of his finer and more useful inventions. He smirked on his tiny beak and pulled his view back to normal.

“He’s the one,” Mervo said reassuringly. “Except he’s gotten the townsfolk in a bit of a tiff, a scuffle if you will. We’ll need a quick way to snag him out of there.”

“What will we do?” Pudge asked.

Mervo thought, devising a tactical solution. “We need a chain.”

“Don’t got one,” Shy Away responded.

“Rope?” Mervo asked.

“Nope.”

“String?!”

“Nope.”

Mervo ruffled his feathers. “What do we have?”

“Dental floss!” Shy Away said, whipping out a massive amount.

“Spec-freakin’-tacular…” Mervo groaned. “Well, whatever, it’ll have to work. Pudge, give me your fork…”

~*~*~*~

“He’s a downright doppelganger!”

“He’s a’ enemy o’ society!”

“He was looking for Chef Torte,” the orange Yoshi informed.

“Gadzooks! He musta been one of that guy’s lackeys! He’s fixin’ for another round, is he? Well I’ll pitchfork him good!”

As the townsfolk rushed in with their torches and other medieval mob accessories, Maggy looked on sympathetically towards the red-robed Magikoopa. He wasn’t really doing anything wrong, just hiding out as a Yoshi in the society. And so what if he was? Maybe he was trying to get a fresh start, and didn’t want any trouble. Maggy’s heart sank when she caught sight of Changling’s terrified face. She felt so very bad for exposing him.

“Oh mah, I can’t just sit here while that poor lil’ fella gets marooned by the citizens of Glazedon! I gotta do somethin’…” Maggy worried. She suddenly had a thought and dove in the air, drilling as fast as she could into the soil.

Changling was about ready to use his magical skills against these weak residential folk (he planned to turn into a bumblebee and fly away), when something sounding like a rocket echoed from the north side of town. Everyone’s attention was turned to a massive fork trailing a thin line of floss behind it. The fork smashed into the ground in front of Changling, bashing his foot painfully. He cried out in pain as a fluttering Shy Guy slid down the floss and twirled in front of the shapeshifter.

“Please grab on tight to my watering can, and we’ll get you out of here spick and span!” Shy Away instructed.

Changling, confused and crying his eyes out over his smashed foot, snagged onto the watering can. Shy Away tugged the floss twice, sending the message back to its two partners to reel ‘er in. Unfortunately, Maggy’s plan had just come through. The ground below Changling disappeared and Maggy’s grubby palms grabbed his free foot and tried to pull the shelled creature inside her subterranean escape. Mervo and Pudge started tugging furiously on the dental floss, but Maggy held up quite a fight. She pulled and pulled at Changling, who was spreading in two directions like silly putty. Shy Away placed the Magikoopa’s grip onto the fork and started heaving away at the submerged utensil. Changling cried and just wanted to go home when the fork broke free from its place. The fork, Shy Away, Changling, and Maggy were sent flying like a catapult straight back at Mervo and Pudge. The townspeople dropped their jaws in awe at the comedic situation, confused over the possible events that would follow their landing.

“Finally! We’ve pulled them back!” Mervo said.

“Um, Mervo,” Pudge said worriedly, tugging at the bird’s side.

“What?!” the Pidgit snapped. Pudge pointed into the sky at the four objects gaining closer to them with still increasing speed. Mervo winced.

“This one’s gonna hurt…”

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