Super Mario RPG: No Legend of the 7 Dumb Stars

By Crazy Koopa

Chapter 11: Exor Gets Destroyed!

Last time Mario and Co. found out that Nimbus Landís hot springs are, well... hot springs. Also they lost to the Axem Rangers and had to redo their adventures for Stars 1-6! Now we go back to Mario and Co. in Nimbus Land again.

Mario: Iím stumped. Where do we need to go for our 7th Star?

Bowser: My Keep?

Princess: The Mushroom Kingdom?

Mario: No, Mack was there with Star 1.

Bowser: I said my Keep!

Mallow: The Forest Maze?

Mario: Bowyer with Star 2.

Bowser: Are you even listening?!

Geno: How about Seaside Town or the Sunken Ship?

Mario: Sunken Ship no. Seaside Town had Yaridovich and Star 5.

Bowser: Why are you ignoring me?!

Princess: How about Barrel Volcano?

Mario: We were just there.

Bowser: HEY!!!

Mario: What?

Bowser: How about we check my Keep?

Mario: Thatís the greatest idea Iíve ever heard from you, Bowser! But how do we get there? The bridge is out!

For the last time! The bridge never fell!

Mario: Silly narrator!


King Nimbus: Ah! There you are! How about you take the Royal Bus to Bowserís Keep!

Mallow: Ok! (whispering to Mario) Never talk about where to go in the throne room or my dad will eavesdrop on us.

Mario: (whispering to Mallow) All right.

Mario and Co. go to the Royal Bus Stop to royally wait for the Royal Bus to arrive royally.

Mario: Did you have to include that many royals in that sentence?

Nope! I just did it to annoy you!


Royal Bus Keeper: Hello, Prince Mallow! How may I help you?

Mallow: Can you bring the Royal Bus?

Royal Bus Keeper: Sure! HEY BOB! GET THAT BUS OVER HERE!

Bob: Iím here. Turns out the engine wasnít ruined after all! It was actually full of jam!

Royal Bus Keeper: How on Plit did it get full of jam?

Bob: Well I gave a lift to some weirdo speaking of mustard and wearing an odd helmet! Than I noticed the engine was full of jam!

Fawful: Curses! My fill every engine of annoyingness has failed like a test of failure!

Mario: I have a feeling Iíll meet him in two of my adventures.

Bob: Well, hop on!

Bob, the Royal Bus Driver, flies the bus to Bowserís Keep.

Mario: Hey the bridge isnít out! Why didnít the narrator tell me?


Bowser: Ah... The smell of boiling lava.

Geno: Lava?! AHHHHH!!!

Mario and Co. go through the parts Mario went through in the Prologue and then enter some new areas.

Croco: Hey! Iíll sell you guys and girl items!

Mario: Didnít you die?

Croco: No, not really.

Mario: What do you have?

Croco: This legendary Guide! Mint condition!

Mario: Guide for what?

Croco: Guide for this Fun Fiction! It has detailed maps and everything!

Mario: Iíll take it!

Mario and Co. buy the guide for 350 coins. Mario and Co. are now in the 6 Doors room.

Wendy: Welcome! This is the 6 Doors Game Show! Iím your hostess, Wendy!

Random Moron: You were made from the Hostess Factory?!

Wendy: Not that kind of hostess, moron! Anyways, two Rooms have quizzes, two rooms have action stages, and two rooms have fighting! Pick your door!

Mario: 1
Mallow: 6
Geno: 5
Bowser: 3
Princess: 2

Wendy: Oh, and by the way, each room is hosted by a Koopaling.

Bowser: I just remembered something!

Mario: What?

Bowser: My Koopalings already do exist!

Mario: So you put Morton in your dungeon for no reason?

Bowser: Yeah, maybe.

With MarioÖ

Mario: What room is this?

Iggy: Welcome to the Quiz Room! Iím your host, Iggy Koopa!

Mario: Give me all the questions you have! Iím ready!

Iggy: Technically, Ludwig is doing the questions. Iím doing coin collecting, magic buttons, and ball solitaire.

Mario: Ok.

Now with MallowÖ

Ludwig: Welcome! This is Door 6! Iím your host, Ludwig von Koopa!

Mallow: What room is this?

Ludwig: Just like my Lemmyís Land section, quizzes!

Mallow: Fine. Give me a question!

Now with GenoÖ

Lemmy: Welcome! Iím your host, Lemmy! This room is an Action Stage.

Geno: What kind of action stages?

Lemmy: First platform hopping, then ball riding, and finally a Donkey Kong-like game!

Now with BowserÖ

Larry: Welcome, King Dad! You already know who I am!

Bowser: Uhh... Who are you?

Larry: Larry!

Bowser: Larry who?

Larry: Your son.

Bowser: I have a son named Larry?

Larry: ...

Now with the princessÖ

Morton: Hi, hello, greetings, salutations, hola, whatís up? Iím your host, guide, Morton Koopa Jr!

Princess: Why did I pick Door 2?


Mario: Whatís the catch with coin collecting?

Iggy: You have to NOT get the last coin! There are 21 coins in this box.

Mario: Ok!

Mario takes 4 coins.
*17 Left*

Iggy: Iíll take four!
*13 Left*

Mario: 4!
*9 Left*

Iggy: 4 again!
*5 Left*

Mario: 1!
*4 Left*

Iggy: 4!

Mario: HA! I tricked you!


Ludwig: Question 13, who am I?

Mallow: Uhh... Ludwig von Koopa?

Ludwig: Right! You win!


Geon: IT BURNS!!!

Lemmy: You didnít even jump from the first platform yet.

Geno: Can I float?

Lemmy: Sure.

Geno: Than that makes this easier!

Geno floats to the door and enters the ball-riding section.


Larry: How can you not know your own son?!

Bowser: Who are you again?


Door 3 Complete!

Bowser: Heh. The old forget my son trick works every time.


Morton: You only have one enemy, monster, person, bad guy left to fight, brawl, melee with!

Princess: Finally!


Iggy: Magic buttons finished! Now for ball solitaire!

Mario: That canít be too hard!


Ludwig: You may have guessed the right amount of barrels, but this is the toughest test yet!

Mallow: Bring it on!


Geno: I canít do it!

Lemmy: Címon! Ball riding is fun!

Geno: I canít get on! Itís too big!


Princess: Finally done with this challenge.

Morton: You have completed, finished, ended Door 2! Goodbye, sayonara, chow!

Door 2 Complete!


Iggy: You have finished my challenge!

Door 1 Complete!


Ludwig: Boo, Goo, Kipp, and Bones competed in a Triathlon. Find out which place each person was in.

Boo: I came in first!

Bones: I came in second!

Kipp: I came in third!

Goo: I came in fourth!

Mallow: Boy this is tough.

Ludwig: What do you guess?

Mallow: Iím guessing, Goo, Kipp, Bones, and Boo from fourth to first!

Ludwig: Correct! You pass!

Door 6 Complete!


Lemmy: You finally got to the top!

Geo: It wasnít easy.

Door 5 Complete!

Mario and Co. go to a new path that revealed itself and fall down into a room with a save block.

Mario: Our only choice is to go through that door!

Mario and Co. enter the door and find a Magikoopa.

Magikoopa: Destroy intruders!

Bowser: Destroy me and Iíll fire you.

Magikoopa: Uhh... Heal intruders! Give infinite coin chest to intruders!

Croco: Hey! Iíll sell you more items!

Mario: How did you get in here?

Croco: Plothole!

Mario: ... Iíll buy new armor!

Mario and Co. buy their Ultimate armor. Now they are in a hallway with a lot of Thwomps.

Mario: Run!!!

Mario and Co make it to the other side of the room and enter the next room, which looks exactly like the room where Mario fought Bowser in the Prologue.

???: HAHAHA!!!

Mario: Whoís there?

???: I am Boomer!

Mario: Where are you?

Boomer: Look up, fool!

Mario: Iíll just jump up to that chandelier.

Mario and Co. jump up onto the chandelier.

Boomer: En garde!


Boomer: 350 HP

Mario: 450 HP
Mallow: 300 HP
Geno: 500 HP
Bowser: 600 HP
Princess: 500 HP

Boomer: DIE!

Mario: 449 HP: That was your attack?

Boomer: Of course! Now for my ultimate attack! Commit Suicide!


Mario and Co: ...

Shy Guy: To the TOP!

Mario: What?


Mario: What just happened?

Mallow: We got to the top somehow.


Mario: Whoís there?

???: I AM EXOR!

Mario: Where are you?

Exor: Up here, fool!

Mario: Oh!


Exor: 1 HP
R. Eye: 1 HP
L. Eye: 1 HP
Neosquid: 350 HP

Mario: Time to die! JUMP!



Right Eye: AHHHHHH!!!

Exorís Protection Gone!

Exor: Crud...

Geno: Geno Whirl!


Mario and Co: WHAT?!

Exor: NOOO! *BOOM!*

Exorís hilt died!

End of Chapter 11:

Why was Exor forced to swallow Mario and Co? Why couldnít Geno ride a ball? What about the seed? Find out on Chapter 12: Next Stop... Detour Around the World!

Read on!

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