The Koopalings are running as fast as they can. Behind them are a bunch of Koopas.
Koopa #1: Get them!
Koopa #2: Those are the assassins!
Koopa #3: Hey, why are our names Koopa #1, Koopa #2, and Koopa #3?
Koopa #2: Who cares? Just get ‘em!
Wendy: I’m finally famous!
A spiked ball is thrown at the Koopalings. They duck.
Wendy: But not in the way I want to be!
Lemmy: We gotta-
Iggy: Shake ‘em off!
Lemmy stops. He turns around and pulls out his freeze ray. He turns the dial on it to “Frozen Solid”. He zaps the Koopas. The angry mob is frozen solid.
Lemmy: That oughta cool you guys off.
Lemmy joins his siblings. They stop for a moment. Ludwig looks forward.
Ludwig: I can see my castle!!!
Morton: Wow! It looks awesome, spectacular, super, fabulous, fantastic, grand, fantástico- *SOCK*
Roy: Will you please shut up for the rest of the story?
Morton: Gob it. (Got it.)
Bowser Jr: Now all we gotta do is go to Future Ludwig, take his time machine, and we can get home!
Ludwig: Uh… It might be harder than that... Considering my supreme IQ at my age...
Siblings: ‘_‘
Ludwig: I can only imagine how smart my future self is.
The Koopalings go to the door of the castle. They see a button with a speaker above it. Larry presses the button.
Speaker: Voice activation needed.
Ludwig: Uh… I command you to activate!
Speaker: Processing… activated. Welcome, Ludwig.
The door opens.
Ludwig: Cool! I can unlock everything my future self can!
The Koopalings walk inside. They walk down the hall and see an elevator. They see another button with a speaker above it by the elevator. Larry presses the button.
Speaker: Transportation elevator unlocked.
Larry: What does “transportation” mean?
Ludwig: It’s going from one place to another.
The elevator doors open. The Koopalings step inside… well… they’re sorta stuffed inside.
Wendy: OW! Roy! Get your elbow outta my face!
Roy: Both my elbows are in people’s faces! Which one’s in yours?
Larry: Get your foot off of my foot, Lemmy!
Lemmy: Sorry! Ow! Your finger’s in my eye, Junior!
Junior: WAH!!! Someone’s on my foot!!!
Ludwig: QUIT YOUR COMPLAINING! I don’t know which room’s the room with the time machine out of all eight of these room buttons, so I’m gonna press all of them!
Ludwig does so. Everyone disappears. Roy appears in room 1, Larry in room 2, Ludwig in room 3, Wendy in room 4, Lemmy in room 5, Iggy in room 6, Junior in room 7, and Morton in room 8.
Room 1…
Roy looks around. He sees a bunch of chemicals in beakers and test tubes.
Roy: I wonder what I should do with these.
He picks one of the beakers up. He drinks it. He starts shaking. He shrinks a little bit. His head becomes shaped like an upside-down Mushroom. His arms shrink until they are completely gone. His face becomes brown.
Roy: AHH!!! I’m a stupid Goomba!
Someone is zapped into the room. It is a female Koopa.
Koopa: I can’t believe I’m working for Ludwig. If I was going to have a job during this whole “Koopas Takeover the World” thing I would’ve LIKED to have worked for Wendy. But NNNOOOO. Ludwig was the first one to find me and then he forced me into this job!
Roy looks at the empty beaker he drank out of. He jumps inside. The Koopa walks over to where the beaker is.
Koopa: Hmm… Someone left a beaker on the floor. And… what’s that thing inside it?
Roy: Oh… I’m just a regular Goomba.
Koopa: AHH!!! Who said that?
Roy: ME! In the beaker!
The Koopa bends down and looks inside.
Koopa: A Goomba with sunglasses and reptile skin?
Roy: Well yeah… uh… You see… I was… uh…
Koopa: Don’t bother telling me what happened. You drank from this beaker and now you’re a Goomba.
Roy: Well yeah and uh… think you could change me back?
Koopa: I’ll do what I can. My name’s Dooplisselle Koopa.
Roy: I’m Roy Koopa!
Dooplisselle: King Roy Koopa?!
Dooplisselle picks up the beaker.
Roy: No… I’m Roy Koopa as a child. It’s a long story.
Dooplisselle: I oughta take you to Ludwig!
Roy: No! Everyone thinks me and my sibs are assassins. My sibs! They might be in trouble! I gotta find ‘em!
Dooplisselle: Then I gotta change you back quick!
Dooplisselle pours another chemical into Roy’s beaker. Roy starts drowning.
Roy: ACK!!! HELP!!!
Dooplisselle: Stop choking and drink it!!!
Roy sucks in. He swallows the chemical. He grows his arms back. His head changes back and he grows back to normal size. His head is sticking out of the beaker.
Roy: Uh… I could use some more help, please.
Dooplissele drops the beaker. It shatters and Roy’s body expands back to its regular size now that he’s out of the beaker.
Roy: Thanks!
Dooplisselle: Well, where are you headed?
Roy: I need to get Ludwig’s time machine!
Dooplisselle: It’s in the throne room. Room (blanking this out to keep it a surprise).
Roy: Thanks!
Roy goes in the elevator. He presses a button and is zapped away.
Room 2…
Larry looks around. He sees a big dueling arena like the one in Yu-Gi-Oh Season 1. A Koopatrol is standing on one side of the arena.
Koopatrol: Hey you! You’re not authorized to be here! This room is where King Ludwig’s testing out his new Ludwig Trading Cards!
Larry: Sorry. I’ll leave.
Koopatrol: NO! I challenge you to a
duel! If you win, I’ll grant you freedom! If you lose, you’ll die at my
hand!
Larry: Fine, whatever.
Koopatrol: I shall fuse myself with the spirit of the ancient pharaoh by using the Millennium Puzzle!
The Koopatrol lifts up the triforce which he has chained to his neck.
Larry: Oh brother. That’s the Triforce!
Koopatrol: No it’s not! I had to put these three triangles together to make this! It’s obviously a puzzle! THE MILLENNIUM PUZZLE!!! AHH!!! I’ve done it! (disguises his voice like Yami) Now prepare yourself for defeat!
Larry: You idiot.
Koopatrol: It’s time to d-d-d-d…d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-DUEL!
Larry is shown on the side of the arena opposite form the Koopatrol. The Koopatrol draws some cards from his deck.
Koopatrol: I summon my Armored Yoshi in attack mode!
A Yoshi with a spiked helmet and saddle appears on the battlefield.
Koopatrol: Now my Yoshi, ATTACK!!!
The Yoshi shoots his tongue from his mouth. He wraps it around Larry. Larry breathes fire on the Yoshi’s tongue. The Yoshi shatters.
Koopatrol: NO!!! My Yoshi!!! You shall be avenged! I end my turn.
Larry takes some cards from his deck. He stares at them, not knowing what to do.
Larry: Oh for Pete’s sake!
Larry makes a miraculous jump over to the Koopatrol. He slashes the Koopatrol with his claws.
Koopatrol: OH!!! My life points!
500 life points are taken away from the Koopatrol. Larry jumps back to his platform.
Koopatrol: Hmm… Ha ha ha ha ha ha! Mwa ha ha ha ha! You thought you had already beaten me! But I have… a spell card! It lets me summon the three monsters Dice-It, Slice-It, and Snifit in one turn!
A Shy Guy with dice and a magician’s hat, a Shy Guy with a sword and a bandana around his head, and a Snifit appear.
Koopatrol: Unfortunately I can’t attack on the same turn. So I end my turn. Mwa ha ha!
Larry makes another jump to the Koopatrol. He throws him onto the battlefield.
Larry: Get ‘im!
Dice-It, Slice-It and Snifit all start chasing the Koopatrol.
Larry: Oh yeah, and where’s Ludwig’s time machine?
Koopatrol: AHH! IN HIS THRONE ROOM, ROOM (blanked out)!!!
Larry: Thanks!
Larry jumps off of the platform and goes in the elevator. He presses a button and is zapped away.
Room 3…
Ludwig looks around. He walks over to something that looks like a big slot machine. The machine has 5 slots.
Machine: Hello! I’m the Quiz Machine! If you get 3 answers from my 5 questions correct, then I’ll tell you anything you want to know!
Ludwig: Ok. I accept!
The Quiz Machine’s slots start spinning.
Quiz Machine: OOOOOOOOOOOOK! Here’s your first question! What is the name of the Guardian of the Star Gate?
Ludwig: Geno!
Quiz Machine: Ooh… No. I’m sorry. The REAL name of the Guardian of the Star Gate is ??!?. You got that answer wrong! Guess I’ll have to mark it wrong!
The first slot stops on an X.
Ludwig: But that’s only Geno’s technical name!
Quiz Machine: Second question! What is the place you go to for the start of the first chapter in Paper Mario 2?
Ludwig: Petal Meadow!
Quiz Machine: Good job! You got it right!
The second slot stops on an O.
Quiz Machine: Third question! A Goomba is a ____ put under a spell! What word goes in the blank?
Ludwig: Toad!
Quiz Machine: Correct!
The third slot stops on an O
Quiz Machine: Fourth question! I like eating pie!
Ludwig: Huh?
Quiz Machine: Wrong answer!
The fourth slot stops on an X.
Quiz Machine: Final question! What does Mario need to get to defeat Bowser in the boss fights in Super Mario Bros?
Ludwig: He needs to grab the axe behind him!
Quiz Machine: That is the right answer!
The final slot stops on an O.
Quiz Machine: YOU WIN! Now… what information can I give you today?
Ludwig: Where’s King Ludwig’s time machine?
Quiz Machine: King Ludwig’s time machine is in his throne room! Room (blanked)!
Ludwig: Thanks!
Quiz Machine: You’re welcome! Have a nice day! OH! Wait just a minute! I can’t let you leave with that information! You’re one of the assassins!
Ludwig: AHH!!! Wait!
The Quiz Machine starts firing slots at Ludwig. Ludwig dives into the elevator and presses a button. He’s zapped away. Two slots are fired into the elevator, too. They’re zapped away as well.
Wendy is dropped into a go-kart. She sees a big tunnel in front of her. The tunnel has a big, metal barrier blocking it.
Tunnel (the barrier raises up and down as it speaks): Welcome to Ludwig’s Virtual Reality Kart Adventure! You’ll be forced to risk your life as you race through various hazards and obstacles that could leave you smeared all over the road! Ready
A virtual reality helmet drops on to Wendy’s head.
Tunnel: GO!
Wendy pushes on the gas pedal because the floor starts crumbling (see what the tunnel meant by “forced”?). She drives into the tunnel. The virtual reality helmet makes her think she’s going through a desert. Pokeys keep rising from the sand.
Wendy: If this is virtual reality, there’s no way I’ll get hurt driving into those.
Wendy drives into a Pokey. She goes through it and comes out scorched and burned. The car is unharmed. Reality shows she actually drove through a beam of heat coming from the floor.
Wendy: Ok. Not trying that again.
She drives into another tunnel and comes out driving on a cosmic path in outer space. She drives along the narrow path trying not to get hurt. UFOs fly to the sides of the narrow path, shooting at Wendy. She swerves left and right trying to avoid the blasts and at the same time trying not to drive off of the path. She makes it down the path and goes through another tunnel. She comes out driving on a rocky narrow path in a volcano. The path crumbles as she drives by. Monsters made of lava rise from the lava and start spewing lava at her. She presses a button on the go-kart that gives her an extra boost of speed. She speeds away from the monsters.
Wendy: Gee whiz! What’s next?
She goes through another tunnel. She comes out on a racetrack. She stops at the starting line. She looks to the right and sees her opponent, a green lizard robot.
Lizard Robot: I’m the main brain of this simulation! I’m gonna squash you!
Wendy takes the helmet off for a second. She sees that she really IS racing a robot lizard. She and the lizard robot takeoff. The lizard robot makes the starting line always appear in front of him. He gets up to his final lap when Wendy comes up from behind and gets to right beside him. She reaches over and rips wires out from the lizard robot’s back. The robot malfunctions and starts saying random things.
Lizard Robot: AHH!!! Ludwig’s time machine’s in Room (blanked). I never wanted to be a robot. I like ponies!
BOOM!!!
Everything shatters into pixels. Wendy drives out of the tunnel. She drives into the elevator, presses a button, and is zapped away.
Room 5…
Lemmy looks around at all the inventions in the room. He sees a “Stretch Ray”. He presses a button on it. He is zapped. After being zapped he is stretched so much that you could not see him by looking at him from the left and right because he’s paper thin on his sides. Looking at him from a front view or behind view though, he looks extremely tall.
Lemmy: Um… Ok. This is weird.
He presses the button again and is zapped back to normal. He sees some Koopas get zapped into the room. He quickly presses a button on the shrink ray. He is zapped to 5 centimeters tall. He runs over to the Koopas.
Koopa #1: Hey! I got the same name as that guy from the beginning!
Koopa #2: But our names are Phil and Zach.
Phil: Oh yeah.
The Koopas start walking towards an invention. Lemmy hitches a ride on Phil’s pants leg. He starts swinging all over as Phil walks. Phil and Zach stop. Lemmy hops off.
Phil: We'd better test King Ludwig’s new Gargantuan Ray for him.
Zach: Yep.
Zach presses a button on the ray. The ray aims at the floor and zaps.
Phil: What the?
In reality, Lemmy got zapped. His body starts getting bigger. His head is still small but it inflates to an abnormal size. His arms and legs poke out from his body, too. They’re huge as well.
Zach: We’ve zapped some sort of amoeba and made it take on an extreme size!
Lemmy’s head hits the ceiling. He stops growing.
Phil: Maybe it’s a friendly amoeba…
Zach: If it is, we can sell it on Zbay!
Lemmy: Roar!
Phil: I don’t think it is! AHH!!!
Zach: We gotta go to the throne room and report this to King Ludwig!
Phil and Zach run to the elevator.
Phil: To Room (blanked)!
Zach presses a button.
Phil: Why do you always get to press the button?
Zach: I don’t know. I must be more important than you.
Phil and Zach start fighting. They’re zapped away. Lemmy turns a dial on the shrink ray. He turns it to “Shrink to Normal Size”. He is zapped back to normal size. He goes in the elevator and presses the same button Zach did.
Lemmy: I hope the time machine’s in the throne room.
He’s zapped away.
Room 6…
Iggy finds himself in a maze. Two Koopas go over to him.
Koopa #1: We need better names.
Koopa #2: Our names are Ralph and Joe.
Ralph: Oh.
Joe: Hello there, young Koopa. We’re testing if it’s easier to get through a maze with a teleportation device, or by using your brain.
Ralph: You’ll be racing us through this maze by using your brain, and we’ll use this portable transportation remote thingy. Whoever wins sets the maze on fire! Good luck!
Ralph presses a button on the remote. He and Joe are zapped away. Iggy runs through the winding paths and turns. He keeps winding up at dead ends and turning around. He runs into Joe and Ralph.
Joe: You’re catching up?! We gotta find a way out, Ralph!
Ralph presses a button on the remote. They’re zapped away. Iggy runs forward and makes a left turn. He comes to a split in the path. He goes to the right. He runs into Joe and Ralph again.
Joe: AHH!!! RALPH! I’m relieving you of duty!
Ralph: GAH! Let go!
Joe and Ralph start fighting over the remote. Iggy swipes the remote. He presses a button on it and is zapped to the exit. He runs out of the maze and sees a lever. He pulls it back and it snaps in half. The maze is set ablaze. Joe and Ralph look around.
Ralph: Hmm… It seems that it’s easier to steal the teleportation device from your opponent and use it.
Joe takes a notebook and pen out of his shell and so does Ralph. They start writing stuff down in them. Iggy sees a doorway leading to a staircase. A sign by the stairs says, “To Ludwig’s Throne Room”.
Iggy: I’d say that’s the best place to check for the time machine.
Iggy runs up the stairs.
Bowser Jr. looks around the room. He sees all sorts of inventions. He also sees a throne with a dark figure sitting there. Oh forget it. He’s in Ludwig’s throne room. I think we’ll come back later.
Morton looks around the room and sees various robots. He goes over to one that looks like the robot Ludwig used in the final part of Super Mario Moonlight. In fact, it is the robot Ludwig used in the final part of Super Mario Moonlight. (Read the story and you’ll see what the robot looks like.)
Morton: This is the robot Ludwig used in the final part of Super Mario Moonlight! I wonder why Adult Ludwig has it. After all, this robot would be quite old. And I thought it blew up! Perhaps it was rebuilt? Why would he rebuild it?
Just press a button!
Morton: Oh. Ok.
Morton presses a button on the robot. It turns on. The robot’s eyes turn red.
Robot: Intruder alert! Intruder alert! Activate intruder offense mode!
Morton: YIPES!!! I’m never listening to the author again!
Morton pulls out his flamethrower.
Morton: Eat this, you malicious mechanism!
Morton blasts flames at the robot. A fan comes out of one of the robot’s tentacles. The robot blows the flames back at Morton. Morton drops his flamethrower and runs. The robot follows. The robot shoots laser blasts at Morton. Morton goes in his shell and starts sliding around the room, dodging laser blasts. A table is knocked over by Morton. He slides off of it like a ramp. He goes soaring through the air and hits the robot’s hat. The hat comes off and Morton drops through a hole under the hat. He lands in the robot’s control system.
Morton: Uhh… Er…
Morton frantically looks at all of the buttons and levers and switches.
Morton: There’s only one thing to do! So therefore I must do it! Because when there’s only one thing to do you must do it because if there’s only one thing to do and you didn’t do it, you’d be doing nothing!
Morton presses every single button and pulls every single lever. He activates Self-Destruct Mode. He jumps out of the robot before it blows up. A hole is made in the floor from the explosion. Morton looks in the hole. He sees Junior and Adult Ludwig.
Morton: Junior! Adult Ludwig! …*gasp* The time machine!
Morton dives through the hole. He lands on the floor with a thud. The rest of the Koopalings are zapped into the room.
Adult Ludwig is holding Junior hostage. He is holding him by his shell.
Junior: GUYS!!! HELP ME!!! PLLEEEAAAASSSSSEEEEEE!!!
Adult Ludwig: This young Koopa fears death. I don’t have any wish to kill him. But I do need a new specimen to test my inventions on.
Adult Ludwig turns around and looks at the time machine.
Ludwig: Let him go, future me! He’s just a little kid!
Adult Ludwig: “Future me”? Huh.
Adult Ludwig turns around and looks at Ludwig.
Adult Ludwig: We do bear a resemblance, child. But I am not an adult version of you. You’re a lowly peasant, whereas I am a king! You’re also an assassin. Just like the rest of your friends.
Wendy: Let my brother go!
Adult Ludwig: Fine.
Adult Ludwig tosses Junior to them. He lands on the floor with a thud.
Ludwig: Listen, we need your time machine! It’s important!
Adult Ludwig: My time machine?
The time machine is zapped away.
Koopalings: NO!
Adult Ludwig: Ha ha! Say hello to my latest invention!
Adult Ludwig shows a watch on his arm.
Adult Ludwig: This watch doesn’t just tell time, it manipulates it! I can go forward in time, backward in time, and even stop time! By using it, I activated the time machine and sent it to my brother, King Bowser Jr’s castle!
Ludwig: GAH! Everyone! We need that watch! CHHAAARRRRGGGGGEEEEEE!!!
Morton gets up. His flamethrower falls on his head. He picks it up. The rest of the Koopalings draw their weapons. Suddenly everyone is around Ludwig. They charge into him and start beating each other up with their weapons.
Adult Ludwig: AH HA HA HA!
Ludwig: STTOOOPPPP!!!
Everyone freezes.
Ludwig: Don’t do that again! Now, let’s go!
Iggy supersizes himself with his supersize ray; Lemmy, Morton, Ludwig and Wendy aim their respective weapons; Bowser Junior holds his paintbrush up; Roy cracks his knuckles; and Larry takes out a Piranha Plant. Roy suddenly appears in front of Iggy, Ludwig in front of Morton, Wendy in front of Lemmy, and Bowser Junior in front of Larry. Roy starts brawling with Iggy, Ludwig and Morton zap and burn each other, Wendy and Lemmy are soaking and freezing each other, and Bowser Junior is dueling with the Piranha Plant as it chomps at him.
Larry: What’s going on here?!
Ludwig: My future self is stopping time and then misplacing us! We can’t use our weapons!
Everyone turns to where Adult Ludwig was. He’s gone.
Ludwig: Uh oh.
Adult Ludwig appears behind Ludwig. He takes his ray gun.
Adult Ludwig: Ha ha! By going into the future, I disappear until I reappear in the designated time!
Adult Ludwig begins shooting at random. The Koopalings scatter. Some take cover behind inventions, others just run around dodging shots. Ludwig hides behind an invention.
Adult Ludwig: Why waste shots trying to zap while you’re moving when I can just stop time and zap you when you’re sitting ducks?
Ludwig takes a weird-looking remote out of his shell. He presses a button on it at the same time Adult Ludwig presses a button on his watch. Ludwig’s siblings freeze but he and his adult self don’t.
Adult Ludwig: What?! My inventions have never malfunctioned! Well they did when I was a child, but they don’t anymore!!!
Ludwig: I used my Technology Deactivator. It deactivates any technology around it within a 1-mile radius. It also makes the user invulnerable to the effects of any technology around him or her. Your watch deactivated just as you stopped time. We’re the only ones that are aware.
Adult Ludwig: I invented that when I was a kid! It’s not yours! It’s mine!!!
Adult Ludwig aims at Ludwig with the ray gun. He pulls the trigger but it doesn’t fire.
Ludwig: The gun’s disabled.
Ludwig lunges at his future self. He and his future self start rolling on the floor wrestling. Adult Ludwig sends Ludwig flying off of him. Ludwig lands on the floor. He sees his ray gun on the floor. He grabs it. He turns his Technology Deactivator off.
Adult Ludwig: Ha! Now I can destroy your siblings and unfreeze time! And you’re the only thing that’s still moving even though time’s frozen, next to me! You don’t stand a chance against me now that my watch is functioning again!
Ludwig: But the gun’s functioning too, and I have it.
Adult Ludwig: Oh…
Ludwig shoots at his future self. His future self is struck by the bolt in the middle of his forehead.
Adult Ludwig: GAAHHH!!!
Adult Ludwig falls to the floor. Ludwig presses a button on his future self’s watch. His siblings are able to move again. They’re running around in circles except for those that hid behind inventions. The ones that were running around stop running.
Lemmy: Hey, Adult Ludwig’s-
Iggy: On the ground! Is he-
Lemmy: Dead?
Ludwig: No. He’s just unconscious.
Adult Ludwig slightly opens his eyes.
Ludwig: If we get that watch off of him, we can go home!
Ludwig goes over to his future self and reaches for the watch. His future self disappears.
Ludwig: *gasp* No!
Roy: Guess we gotta go and get the time machine at Junior’s place.
Morton: Let us set off, go, travel, walk into the unknown. We shall meet, find, see Bowser Jr. as an adult. And we will get, retrieve the time machine. Then we shall go ho-
Roy: SHHAAADDDDAAAAAPPPPPP!!!