The Lost Species

By General Toad

Scene: Beanbean Plane to the Mushroom Kingdom

Pilot: We will shortly be arriving in the Toad Town International Airport. Please be aware that things are not well there. Shy Guys are currently attempting hostile control. It is advised you stay indoors today. Thanks, and have a nice day! :D

Luigi: Ooooh, that's great news.

And soon...

Flight Attendant: Please exit the plane through doors on your left and right. :D Thanks you for flying Air Bean.

The Bros. exit the plane.

Scene: Toad Town, The Mushroom Kingdom

Mario: *gaaaaaaaaasp*

Toad Town looks like a bomb hit. The sky is filled with smoke, blocking most of the sun; parts of the street are blown away; random houses are on fire or simply gone; all the plants are dead; and to top it all off, in the middle of the plaza is a giant statue of General Guy with a plaque reading "All Hail General Guy".

Luigi: Uuuuuh...

Luigi faints.

Mario: *sigh...*

Mario feeds him a 1-Up mushroom.

Luigi: Uuuu... Thanks Bro.

A random Toad dressed in an army uniform runs by.

Mario: Hey! You! Come here!

Army Toad: NEVER! YOU'LL NEVER GET ME!!! OH! IT'S MARIO! YOUíRE BACK! OH THANK GOODNESS!

Luigi: What happened?

Army Toad: General Guy and his army have come to takeover the Mushroom Kingdom! They drove all the deserter Toads out, and the loyal Toads simply became his slaves. Peach is missing, and many people are saying The Master is dead! THE MASTER! DEAD! Most of the Mushroom Army has fled to other towns just in case Shy Guys strike there. But the ones most loyal to Peach stayed here. The remaining members and some brave citizens are holding up in the sewers, waiting for the right time to strike. Can you help us?

Mario: Well... YES. Yes we can! Right Luigi?

Luigi: Ummmmm, yeah. What he said!

Army Toad: Great! Follow me.

The Bros. follow Army Toad through the beat up streets until they get to the warp pipe to the sewers. They go down the pipe.

Scene: Toad Town Tunnels, Toad Town

Army Toad: Iím sorry Mario, but from here, Iím going to have to blindfold you and your brother.

Mario: Whatever it takes.

Army Toad blindfolds them. He leads them by the hand around corners, down stairs, across bridges, and past drain pipes. Soon, they stop. Army Toad removes their blindfolds them.

Army Toad: Here we are.

In front of them is a wall. Army Toad taps on the wall five times, waits for a few seconds, then taps 3 times.

???: Password?

Army Toad: Johnson.

???: Enter.

The wall opens up, revealing another Army Toad sitting at a desk. Behind him is a warp pipe.

Army Toad #2: GASP! The Mario Bros! Great!

Army Toad: Yeah yeah, weíre in a hurry. This way, Bros.

He goes down the warp pipe.

Mario: Well, you heard him.

Mario goes down the pipe.

Luigi: *sigh*

Luigi goes down the pipe.

Scene: Toad Town Tunnels, 1st Floor

The Bros. come out of the pipe. All around them Toads are huddled in dirty blankets. Some are eating gross-looking Mushrooms while others are simply sleeping, or at least they look like they are sleeping.

Army Toad: Everyone! Great news! Mario and Luigi are back!

All the Toads look up.

Toads: MAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARIO!!!

Army Toad: Great, right?! Excuse me, Mario, I'll be right back.

Army Toad runs off into a different room.

Toads: Oh yay! This is great! We'll surely beat the Shy Guys now! Wow, youíre so clean! I smell food! Present for me?

???: Eh-hem hem!

Toadsworth, Toad, Toadette, and an important looking Army Toad enter the room, followed by Army Toad. All of their clothes are tattered and dirty.

Toad and Toadette: MARIO!

Toadsworth: Quite! Eh-hem... Mario! I'm so glad youíre here! So much has happened since you left! General Guy-

Army Toad: Ummmm, Sir Toadsworth, I already told them.

Toadsworth: Oh yes? Spiffing. Saves me air.

Official Army Toad: Yes well, itís great and all, but when are we going to strike? Just because theyíre back doesnít mean the hard part's over.

Toad: Stop being so negative, General.

General Toad: Iíll be negative as long as Toad Town is in the hands of the Shy Guys and weíre sitting here discussing why Iím negative! Now, Bros, when do you suggest we attack?

Luigi: Well... Ummmmmmm...

Mario: Whenever, I suppose..

Toadsworth: Capital! Hear that, boys? We strike today! We'll get our homes back today!

Luigi: Aw, canít we rest first?

Toads: YAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!! MAR-I-O! MAR-I-O! MAR-I-O!

Little Toad: Luigi! Oh- MAR-I-O!

General Toad: SILENCE!

All the Toads quite down.

Toadsworth: Ok! All able-bodied Army Toads, go get your equipment!

Random Toads: Yes sir! Hut hut hut hut hut hut hut hut hut hut hut!

They leave to a different room.

Toadsworth: Any injured Toad is to evacuate to Shiver City! I want a group of Army Toads to escort them to the pipe! I have a friend there who will shelter you! You!

Army Toad: Yes?

Toadsworth: I'm putting you in charge of the escort. Find Glacy, a Bumpty there. She'll shelter you. Tell her Toadsworth sent you.

Army Toad: Yes sir! Hut hut hut!

Army Toad runs off.

General Toad: Brothers! Are you even ready for an attack? General Guy controls a much more vast army then before, and is aided by Kammy Koopa's magic...

Mario: Kammy?! No one mentioned her!

General Toad: Typical. Kammy's the one who holds the real power here. But that's besides the point. General Guy is just her puppet. The Toads here are armed mostly with hammers, a rare few have Stars, and an even rarer few have Magikoopa wands stolen from fallen Magikoopas.

Luigi: Bro? Remember? We still have Kamek's wand!

Mario: Yeah, Bro! We could use this.

Toadsworth: Capital!

Toad: All right!

General Toad: Well, if all are ready, let's move out! March, men! Form up in front of Peachís Castle!

All the Army Toads march out and one by one and ascend the warp pipe. And soon...

Scene: Peach's Castle Entrence, Mushroom Kingdom

The Army Toads have arranged themselves into 4 blocks, with about 20 Toads to a block. The elite troops have arranged themselves into a star, but there are only 10 of them. General Toad is marching up and down the ranks.

General Toad: Toadsworth! I want you with Block One! Toad and Toadette, Block Two! Block Three, half of you go with Toadsworth, the other half go with Toad and Toadette. Block Four and Star One, come with me. Weíre heavily outnumbered here, but this is our home! Are we going to let the SHY GUYS take it from us?

Army Toads: NO!

Toadsworth: If only we could make a distraction of some sort...

Mario: Wait! Bro! We sitll have the Boo armyís bell!

Luigi: Youíre right! Ring it!

Mario takes out the little hammer and bell and rings it. A ghostly note sounds. Suddenly, an army of Boos appears, led by a Dark Boo in an army hat.

Sergeant Boo: Sergeant Boo, reporting for duty!

General Toad: Excellent work, Mario Bros! Sergeant Boo, divide your men into three groups, one with Toadsworth, one with Toad and Toadette, and the rest with me!

Sargent Boo: Understood, sir!

Toadsworth: Capital!

General Toad: Remember your groups and group leaders. Mario and Luigi, enter after weíre in. Our distraction will cut a clear path for you to get to General Guy. This is for glory, boys! CHARGE!

All the Toads and Boos charge forward, shouting to their heartís content.

Toad, Toadsworth, and Toadette: FOOOR PEEEEEEEEEEEACH!

All the Toads and Boos. pour into the Castle.

A few minutes later...

Mario: Ok, Bro. I think itís time.

Luigi: Iím behind you.

Mario: Break!

Luigi: This isnít football.

The Bros. run into the castle.

Scene: Peach's Castle

Mario: Let's go!

Mario and Luigi charge down a hall. Echoes of battle ring throughout the castle. Eventually they reach a hall where all is quiet.

Mario: Itís quiet...

Luigi: ... Too quiet.

Mario: Bet none of the readers saw that coming.

Luigi: AGAIN with the breaking of the fourth wall?

Voice: HALT!

A black Shy Guy walks out of the shadows.

Anti Guy: You are not authorized to wander in General Guy's halls... or to break the fourth wall! You will be taken straight to the General for interrogation!

More Anti Guys walk out of the shadows.

Mario: (sarcastically) Oh no! What ever shall we do?

Anti Guy: Take Ďem away, boys.

The Anti Guys grab Mario and "take them away".

Luigi: (whispering) Mario! In the words of Toadsworth, "Have you lost your marmalade?!"

Mario: They're taking us to General Guy! EXACTLY where we want to go!

Anti Guy: Quiet!

And soon...

Scene: Peach's Castle, Throne Room

The Anti Guys hurl Mario and Luigi in front of the throne.

Anti Guy: Sir! We have brought you prisoners we found SNOOPING!

Voice: Oh. Well, you may leave. I'll deal with them.

The Anti Guys leave.

Voice: Up! Both of you!

The Bros. stand up. As expected, General Guy is in the throne, only he's wearing Peach's crown on top of his hat.

General Guy: Why it's Mario! And... his brother. The tables have been turned since the last time we met. Now I can do what ever I want with you. I could make you my slaves, I could have you turned into cheese, I could even kill you.

Luigi: *gulp*

General Guy: But I won't do any of these things. First we shall have a re-match. Just me and Mario. This time, the strongest really shall win.

Anti Guys walk out of the shadows and grab Luigi.

Luigi: HEY!

General Guy: Yes Mario, this shall be your final battle. After this, THEN I will kill you.

Mario: We'll see about that.

General Guy: Bring it on.

Mario pulls out his hammer and charges at General Guy. Guy sidesteps swiftly and pulls out a bomb and proceeds to throw it at Mario. Mario sidesteps and pulls out a Fire Flower. He launches a fireball at Guy, who deflects it with Peach's crown, sending it flying away.

General Guy: This is getting nowhere.

He claps his hands, and two Beezos fly in. They hand their pitchforks to Guy, who promptly throws one to Mario.

General Guy: We will settle this like gentlemen.

General Guy lunges at Mario, pitchfork extended. Mario deflects the blow with his. They start to clash with their forks. Blow after blow they land, neither hitting the other, until Guy does a long sweep with his, pushing Mario off his feet. Guy quickly snaps his fork into five pieces, pinning Mario to the ground with four and pointing the sharpest on at him.

General Guy: It's over, Mario. Any last words?

Mario: Not yet!

Mario springs up, tearing the bottom of his pants and sleeves in the process, whips out Kamek's wand, concentrates all his firepower into it, then releases it in one big fireball. It slams into General Guy and knocks him into the wall. The Anti Guys promptly release Luigi and disappear back into the shadows.

Luigi: You did it, Bro!

General Guy: Uhhh...

Voice: Well done, Mario.

Kammy floats out of the shadows.

Kammy: The wand you wield once belonged to Kamek. It is one of the two great wands. I see you learned how to use it well.

Mario: What do you want?

Kammy: Oh, nothing much. Only that wand. In exchange, I'll give you this nifty little doo-dad.

Kammy pulls out a Diamond Mask that looks like a Shy Guy mask.

General Guy: No! Not the Diamond Mask! We had a deal!

Kammy: Deal's off.

Mario: We'll do it!

Kammy: Good. Now here's your gem.

She throws the crystal to Mario. Mario throws the wand over.

Kammy: At last! Fools!

Mario, Luigi, and General Guy: ???

Kammy: At long last I can summon the greatest MagiKoopa in the universe: Kamella!

Read on!


 
Comments, suggestions, stories, or story ideas? Email me!
Go back to Lemmy's Fun Fiction.
Go back to my main page.