Tin Mario

By Crazy Koopa

Chapter 3: Hot Hot Times on Lavalava Island

Last time, Mario and Watt entered Flower Fields, killed every flower, and found a new partner named Lakilester, who had a Medieval type speech. Mario and Co. managed to kill Roy and Huff N' Puff. Mario and Co. are now talking to Klevar...

Klevar: Thank you, Mario! You can now use Time Out!

Mario: Yay!

Lakilester: Let's-a go!

Mario and Co. leave Flower Fields.

Mario: Where should we go now?

Lakilester: I-a don't-a know!

Mario: ... I'm switching partners.

Watt: Uhh... How about we ask someone?

Mario: Who?

Watt: I don't know!

Meanwhile in Peach's Castle...

Peach: I'm bored!

Twink: I'm hungry!

Peach: There is a kitchen downstairs.

Twink: Ok.

The Princess goes out of her room.

Koopatrol: Halt! Princess! Why aren't you in your room?

Peach: I'm hungry!

Koopatrol: Than go wait in the Dining Room!

Peach: Ok.

Peach goes to the Dining Room and finds Gourmet Guy.

Gourmet Guy: I heard this Fun Fiction is safer than P.T.'s.

Than P.T. comes in and tosses a Thwomp with a spiked bottom on top of Gourmet Guy.

Gourmet Guy: Crud! I'm hated here too! But first, Lavalava Island is where the next Star Spirit is!

Peach: Why did you tell me?

Gourmet Guy dies.

Gourmet Guy's Ghost: Because!

Peach: That was weird. Twink, go tell Mario!

Twink: Ok!

Koopatrol: We made you burned eggs on a stick!

Peach: That's weirder.

Back to Mario...

Mario: You sure we should ask Merlon?

Watt: Yes.

Mario: 100 percent sure?

Watt: Yes.

Mario: 110 percent sure?

Watt: Yes.

Twink: MARIO!

Mario: Yes?

Twink: Lavalava Island is where you need to go!

Mario: Ok.

Twink leaves.

Watt: How do we get there?

Mario: It is an island, so we'll go to the docks.

Mario and Co. head to the docks.

Koopa: Hello! I am Kolorado. And who are you, old bean?

Mario: I'm Mario!

Kolorado: I say, are you heading to Lavalava Island, old bean?

Mario: Yes.

Kolorado: Ah! Good show, old boy! I'm going to Lavalava Island myself for the legendary treasure.

Mario: Do you have a boat?

Kolorado: Alas, no, old bean.

Mario: Than how do we get on the island?!

Watt: What's that blue thing?

Mario: Maybe Lavalava Island!

Mario goes to the blue island.

Mario: ... Nothing!

Mario pounds his hammer on the island.

Island: OW!

Mario: WOAH!

The island makes Mario go back to the docks and reveals itself to be a...

Kolorado: Tuna!

Tuna: I'M A WHALE!

Kolorado: Don't lie to me! I know a tuna when I see one, old bean!

Whale or Tuna: GAH!

The Whale/Tuna explodes!

Mario: Now how are we supposed to get to the island?

Repair Guy: Hey Mario! I fixed your train! How do you stop this thing?!


Mario, Watt, Kolorado: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!

Bowser Jr: Ok, it says Mario will arrive on the island about... now...

Mario, Watt, and Kolorado: ...HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!

Bowser Jr: WE FIGHT!


Mario: 30HP
Watt: 25HP

Bowser Jr: 70HP

Everyone including Bowser Jr: O_O 70 HP?!

What? Am I the only person who actually likes using him in games and likes him as one of my favorite characters?

Bowser Jr: ^_^ Yay!

Mario and Watt: >_< Boo!

Boo: Yeah?

Everyone: NOT YOU!

Boo: ...

Mario: Jump!
Bowser Jr: Hide!
Mario: OW! 29HP

Watt: Electro Dash!
Bowser Jr: 66HP

Bowser: Paintbrush!
Bowser Jr. paints 2 Wind Spirits!

Mario: Hammer!
Bowser Jr: 65HP

Watt: Turbo Charge!
Mario's Attack +1 for 2 turns!

Bowser Jr: Shell Toss!
Bowser Jr. slides his shell towards Mario!
Mario: 26HP

Wind Spirits: Wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!
Wind Spirits are charging!

Mario: Huh?
Mario says "Huh?" No damage!

Mario: WHAT?!
Mario says "WHAT?!"! Lose a turn!

Watt: Electro Dash!
Bowser Jr: 61HP

Bowser Jr: Trial Shell Toss!
Mario: 13HP
Watt: 17HP
Bowser Jr: 30HP
Wind Spirit: 1HP
Wind Spirit: 1HP
Note: The Wind Spirits always had 1HP.
Bowser Jr: Now we all have half our HP!

Wind Spirits are charging! Next turn is when they attack!

Mario: Oh no! Jump!
Mario jumps through the Wind Spirit!

Watt: Turbo Charge!
Mario's Attack = +1 for 1 turn!

Mario: 1HP PERIL!
Watt: 1HP PERIL!
Bowser Jr: 1HP
Wind Spirit: 1HP
Wind Spirit: 1HP

Mario and Watt are blown away! Bowser Jr. and Wind Spirits are blown away!


Mario and Co. are blown all the way to Yoshi Village.

Mario: Ow...


Kolorado: HELP I SAY! HELP!

Spear Guys and Jungle Fuzzies: Hehe! This is fun!

Another Mmeanwhile...

Bowser Jr: Ow... Wait, I'm supposed to be in the castle! Eh... Who cares? Besides, I want to kill Mario sooner!

Back to Mario...

Mario: Where is that weird guy?

Watt: Who do you mean?

Mario: That Kolorado guy.

Watt: I don't know.

Kolorado's Ghost: You chaps are very bad at helping others.

Mario: AHH! GHOST!

Watt: ... Ghostphobia?

Mario: Since Luigi's Mansion!

Watt: Ah.

Luigi Who Somehow Got to Lavalava Island: DIE!

Luigi sucks up Kolorado's ghost with his Poltergust 3000.

Mario: ... That was weird.

Green Yoshi: Hello, stranger!

Mario: Are you Yoshi?

Green Yoshi: No, but I attended his funeral a few hours ago! His will mentioned that a plumber wearing a red hat told him most Birdo on Plit are guys, which led to his death. Say, you wouldn't happen to be this plumber, would you?!

Mario: No...

Green Yoshi: Good!

Mario and Co. go right and see a volcano...

Mario: How do we get there? No one knows!

Mario and Co. head back.


Mario: So?

Yoshis: No one will eat the vegetables!

Mario: ...

Yoshis: You have to find them!

Mario: Why us?

Yoshi Leader: Because we are too lazy!

Mario: ...

Red Yoshi: You can use that Yoshi with wings over there to help.

Lonely Yoshi: Why me?

Blue Yoshi: Because!

Lonely Yoshi: ...

Mario rides Lonely Yoshi to a tree where Sushie the Cheep Cheep is.

Lonely Yoshi: You're too fat! I'm leaving!

Lonely Yoshi leaves.

Mario: ...

Sushie: Help me!

Mario: Ok!

Mario hits the tree with his hammer.

Mario: Ok, this is going nowhere...

Mario now pulls out an axe and chops the tree down.

Mario: TIMBER!!!

Sushie: Ow...

Mario: Sorry.

Sushie: I'm chasing the Yoshi kids! Have you seen them?

Mario: No, but we're looking too.

Sushie: Than we should work together!

Sushie joins the Party! In battle, Sushie can Belly Flop onto enemies or Squirt them with water! Outside of battle, you can ride her in the water!

Sushie: But first to the inn!

Mario: Why?


Mario: Oh...

Mario and Sushie go to the inn.

Mario: Why is there no bed?

Maria: Because I use healing powers!

Mario: Oh.

Mario and Co. are fully healed!

Mario: Thanks!

Mario and Co. head to the jungle and into the water, and hear a Yoshi kid.



Mario: There is a Yoshi kid around here!

Sushie: There it is!

Red Yoshi Kid: Thanks, Mister!

He leaves.

Mario: ...

Mario and Co. enter the next area and see a spinning flower and pipe.

Mario: Time to go!

Mario jumps on the spinning flower, flies up to the pipe, and lands in it.

Mario: It's dark in here!

Watt: I'm here!

Green Yoshi Kid: Thank you!

Mario: ...

Mario and Co. head to the next area with the light blue Yoshi kid.

Mario: I wonder what happens when I pound this stump with my Hammer?

Mario pounds the stump with his Hammer. Then a huge tree appears, falls, and lands on the Yoshi Kid...

Light Blue Yoshi Kid: Ow... But thank you!

Mario: ...

Mario enters another area with a yellow Yoshi kid being attacked by Putrid Piranhas.

Yellow Yoshi Kid: WAH!

Mario: DIE!

Mario gets his chainsaw and kills the Putrid Piranhas.

Yellow Yoshi Kid: Thank you!

Mario: ... Why do they keep saying that when they can just leave?!

Yellow Yoshi Kid: I was attacked by Putrid Piranhas!

Red Yoshi Kid: That Bush guy scared me so much, that I was frozen!

Green Yoshi Kid: It was too dark to see anything!

Light Blue Yoshi Kid: I can't swim and I was crushed under the tree!

Mario: ... How long have you been stalking us?

Yoshi Kids: Since Light Blue Yoshi Kid was rescued!

Mario: ...

Mario enters another area, only this one is part of the beginning.

Dark Blue Yoshi Kid: Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz...


Mario cuts down the tree with his chainsaw.

Mario: TIMBER!

Dark Blue Yoshi Kid: AHHHHHHH!!!

Mario: Oops...

Dark Blue Yoshi Kid: Thank you!

Mario: ...

Mario saved all the Yoshi Kids!

Mario: Time to go!

Mario enters the village.

Yellow Yoshi: The Elder would like to see you.

Mario and Co. go to the Elder.

Yoshi Elder: Thank you for saving the kids! I shall let you see Raphael the Raven! Use this Jade Statue to see him.

Mario gets a Jade Statue!

Mario: Thanks.

Mario enters the area before the area with the Putrid Piranhas and yellow Yoshi kid, and heads to the Raphael the Raven statue.

Sushie: How did you know to go here?

Mario: The bottom of this statue says so!

Jade Statue Label: Take this statue to the Raphael the Raven statue. Place it in the hole.

Sushie: Oh.

Mario puts the statue in the statue and...


The statue moves aside.

Mario: Let's go!

Statue: Wait!

Mario: O_O You can talk?!

Statue: Yes I can! Now Raphael wants someone to take care of some people. Can you do that?

Mario: Sure!

Mario and Co. enter the next area, which has a tree with vines.

Mario I wonder what happens when I pull the vines...

Mario pulls all the vines and the bushes move aside.

Mario: Odd...

Mario and Co. enter the next area, which has a bunch of holes that are spewing water.

Mario: What are we going to do here?

Sushie: Hmm... Possibly we move those blocks onto the holes.

Mario: Great!

Mario pushes all the blocks over the holes and...

Boom... boom... BOOM!!!

The boulder behind them flies high into the sky because of the hidden geyser. Now the geyser is blocking a path.

Mario and Co: O_O

Mario pushes a block away from a different hole, and the water stops blocking the path and spews over the hole Mario opened again.

Mario: Let's go!

Mario and Co. head to the next area and find the same tree with vines.

Mario: Time to pull!

Nothing happens.

Mario: Huh?

Mario checks the bushes, wondering if there is a switch, but the bushes move aside.

Mario: ...

Mario enters the next area, which has more Putrid Piranhas.

Mario: DIE!

W Magikoopa: We're not serving Bowser, you nitwit! We're serving the great Raphael the Raven!

Mario: Ok. Do you guys know who he wants taken care of?

W Magikoopa: Yes! They are outside the tree he lives in!

Mario and Co. enter the area with a giant tree and finds...


Audience: HAHAHAHAHA!!!

Mario: DAD... I hate live audience neighbors!

Audience: HAHAHAHA!!!

Mario: Uhh... Did you guys know about the hilarious people who live on the planet... err... Lost Planet Alcatraz?

Audience: WE'LL GO!

The audience fly high in the sky with the seats they are sitting in, which turned into a rocket. The W Magikoopa enters.


Mario: No problem!

Mario and Co. head to the top of the tree.

Mario: Are you Raphael the Raven?

Raphael the Raven: Yes. What business do you have here?

W Magikoopa: He got rid of that live audience!

Raphael the Raven: WHAT?! YES! FINALLY! I OWE YOU A WISH!

Mario: I wish for a way to enter Mt. Lavalava!

Raphael the Raven: Done!

Mario: Thank you!

Mario and Co. head down with Raphael.

Raphael: Here is the way to go! Climb the tree with this trampoline and you'll find my mini Ravens working on a project that should be finished soon.

Raven: Caw! Caw!

Raphael: It's done! Now can you take this, too?

Mario obtains an Ultra Stone!

Mario: What does it do?

Raphael: Lets you Ultra Rank your partners when you hit a Super Block.

Mario: Well, time to go!

Mario and Co. enter Mt. Lavalava.


Sushie: I'm turning into fried fish...

Mario and Co. go down the hallway and find a Putrid Piranha


Mario: Why are you acting like a robot?


Mario: Wait, then...


Mario and Co: X_X

Mario and Co. enter a room filled with lava and platforms.

Mario Let's go!

Sushie: It's too hot!

Mario: ... Change partner...

Lakilester: Finally-a! Let's-a go!

Mario rides across the lava with Lakilester.

Mario: Yes! We should enter in no time!

Mario and Co. pass a few rooms, along the way found the hall with the Super Block and upgrade Sushie, and find a path with a Metal Block in the way.

Mario: Time to go to the next room!

Mario enters the room that isn't blocked by a Metal Block with the pulley and finds a lava waterfall.

Mario: Lakilester?

Mario crosses with Lakilester and enters the room with the Ultra Hammer.

Mario: Cannonballer time!

Mario shoots himself to the treasure chest and finds...

Treasure Chest: WEE HEE HEE! FOOLS!

The screen turns purple and a Black Chest Demon appears.


Mario: WAIT! You're not in this story!

Black Chest Demon: Sorry, I got lost.

Mario: Do you have the Ultra Hammer?

Black Chest Demon: Yes, here you go.

Mario obtains the Ultra Hammer!

Mario: Time to go!

Mario and Co. go all the way back to the Metal Block.

Mario: Bye!


Mario: Let' go!

Mario and Co. enter a room with another pulley and cross it. After that, Mario and Co. find a hallway with nothing...

Mario: It's TOO quiet...


A giant spiked ball appears behind them.

Mario: ... RUN AWAY!

Mario and Co. manage to get away and enter another room filled with lava and platforms, only this room has some Firebars and Lava Bubbles.

Mario: Lakilester!

Mario and Co. cross all the way to the other side.

Firebars and Lava Bubbles: Aww...

Mario and Co. find another giant spiked ball, only it's being blocked by Metal Blocks.

Mario: I wonder what happens when I release that thing...

Mario does so and the giant spiked ball rolls down the hill it was on and rolls through the wall.

Mario: Let's go!

Mario and Co. head through the giant hole in the wall and find a staircase and another path.

Mario: The stairs.

Mario and Co. go down the stairs and meet Lava Piranha... and a slightly charred, melted, makeup wearing, and sweating like mad Wendy.

Mario: ...

Partners: ...

Lava Piranha (he didn't come up and see Wendy until now): ...

Everyone in Mt. Lavalava: ...

Plit: ...


Wendy: SHUT UP!!!

Everyone: ...

Lava Piranha: *giggle* Well you bad guys can't have the Star Spirit...

Mario: *chuckle* Well I think I'll get it!

Lava Piranha and Mario: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!


Mario: Anyways, let's fight!


Mario: 30 HP
Sushie: 25 HP

Lava Piranha: 40 HP
Wendy: 20 HP

Mario: Luckily, I found this in the ruins of the Toy Box. Mega Ice Jump!
Lava Piranha: 25 HP
Lava Piranha: OH DAD! THAT'S COLD!

Sushie: Water Block!
Mario's Defense is +1 for 2 turns!

Lava Piranha: Burn!
Mario: 28 HP
Lava Piranha: Grr... I guess your stinking badge and Water Block protect you from my power!

Wendy is throwing a tantrum!

Mario: Huh? Anyways, Mega Ice Jump!
Lava Piranha: 10 HP
Lava Piranha is frozen!

Sushie: Squirt!
Lava Piranha: 5 HP

Wendy is throwing a tantrum!

Mario: What's up with that? Time to finish this. Mega Ice Jump!
Lava Piranha: 0 HP!
Lava Piranha: NOO! Well I lost fair and square, but...

Lava Piranha retreats into the lava!

Mario: Huh?

Sushie: Guess we have to take the Scary Mary over there.

Wendy is throwing an even bigger tantrum!

Sushie: Just for saying that?

Wendy is throwing the biggest tantrum she ever had!
Mario: 1 HP
Sushie: 1 HP
Wendy: 0 HP!

Mario: Huh?

The tantrum wore her out. She is very tired now.

Mario: Oh... Then I guess we win!


Lava Piranha is back! And flamed!

Mario: Oh crud...

Lava Piranha: 40 HP
Lava Bud: 8 HP
Lava Bud: 8 HP

Sushie: Time to use my new move! TIDAL WAVE!
Lava Piranha: 35 HP
Lava Bud: 0 HP
Lava Bud: 0 HP
Lava Piranha: Crud! I can't move!

Mario: ... Mega Ice Jump!
Lava Piranha: 20 HP
Lava Piranha: Darn! I can still be severely damaged from the attack!

Sushie: Squirt!
Lava Piranha: 15 HP

Lava Bud is revived!
Lava Bud is revived!

Mario: Mega Ice Jump!
Lava Piranha: 0 HP!
Lava Piranha: IMPOSSIBLE!


Lava Piranha: Curses...


Wendy trips on a pebble and lands in lava.


Lava: YUCK! Because of that, I'm going to erupt on you!

Mario: ... RUN AWAY! But first, the Star Spirit!

Misstar: RUN AWAY!

Mario and Co. enter the next room.

Misstar: I feel a breeze through this crack! Mario! Use a bomb!

Mario: Ok!

Mario uses one of his Bob-ombs.


Misstar: HURRY!

Mario and Co. climb the stairs and Misstar picks them up and flies out of the volcano.

Misstar: Thank you, Mario! I give you the Star Power Smooch!

Mario: Well at least there was no explosion this time...

Just than, Repair Guy appears on a flying Toy Train.

Repair Guy: I changed your Train into a Plane! How do you stop this thing?!




Watt and Lakilester: WEEEE!!!

End of chapter:

Why do all the chapters so far end with explosions? Why have most of the Koopalings so far been killed? Find out in Chapter 4: A Star Spirit on Ice!

Read on!

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