Tin Mario

By Crazy Koopa

Chapter 4: A Star Spirit on Ice

Author's Note: If you people want to be cameos, ask with the Feedback thing. I'm getting tired of people asking without at least adding feedback!

Last time Mario and Co. got blown up by a train and airplane. Mario also met a new partner named Sushie. Mario and Co. killed Wendy and defeated Lava Piranha and saved Misstar. Mario and Co. are now seen on Toad Town Docks... knocked out...

Mario and Co: X_X

??? 1: Are these the guys?

??? 2: Yes! Take them to my house.


Mario: ... Where are we?

Merlon: In my house!

Ninji: I need your help.

Mario: What?

Ninji: Well the Crystal King took over the Crystal Palace.

Mario: So?

Ninji: The Crystal King is a minion of Bowser’s.

Mario: Does he have a Star Spirit with him?

Ninji: Key words: "MINION OF BOWSER".

Mario: I don't get it.

Ninji: Flashback.


Bowser: Oh. Now to turn you all into cards and give them to my strongest minions and let Mario have a chance to stop me so he goes around the Mushroom Kingdom, beats my minions, and fights and beats me!

Eldstar: You fiend!

Bowser: I wish they were cards!

Poof! Poof! Poof! Poof! Poof! Poof! Poof!

Mamar: (Curse you!)

Skolar: (We'll escape!)

Bowser: Take them, Kammy!

Kammy: Yes, my Lord!

Kammy takes the cards and Bowser and Kammy fly away to Bowser's Castle.

*End of another stupid Flashback!*

(Hey, that's not nice!)

*No one cares!*

(I do!)

*Except you!*

Mario: ... That was weird.

Ninji: I know. Now follow me.

Mario and Co. follow the Ninji down to the sewers.


General Guy: ... Ow... Wait... This is Lavalava Island! But where am I?

Tribal Guy: You are the great god! We shall serve under your command!

General Guy: ... Sweet.

Another Meanwhile...

Huff N' Puff: ... Ow, luckily I reassembled myself. But where is this place?

Tuff Puff: An unknown part of Sky Land, sir.

Huff N' Puff: I see...

Back to Mario and Co... .

Mario: So where are we?

Ninji: Under Toad Town! This blue door will lead you to Shiver City. Around there is Starborn Valley, which is where I live.

Mario: Ok.

Mario and Co. head through the door and pipe inside, and find a Super Block to power up Watt so now she knows Mega Shock. Now Mario and Co. are in Shiver City.

Mario: It's cold!

Mario and Co. head towards the gate to Starborn Valley, but...

Penguin Guard: No one can pass by order of the mayor! Go away!

Mario: ...

Mario and Co. head to the mayor's house by asking directions.

Mario: Where is the mayor's house?

Penguin: In front of you, moron!

Mario: Oh... I knew that...

Penguin: ...

Mario and Co. go in.

Mayor Penguin's Wife: Hello, weird travelers!

Mario: Can you open the gate?

Mayor Penguin's Wife: Sorry, only my husband can do that. He is in the backroom.

Mario and Co. enter the backroom.

Mayor Penguin: Hello, travelers!

Mario: Hello, can you open the...

Than Mayor Penguin's wife comes in and hits Mayor Penguin with a frying pan and gives it too Mario.


Police Penguin: Are you the wife of Mayor Penguin?

Mayor Penguin's Wife: Yes.

Police Penguin: You're under arrest for trying to kill Mayor Penguin again, over.

Mayor Penguin's Wife: Why did you say over?

Police Penguin: I said over because I like saying over! Over! Over! Over! Over! Over!

Mayor Penguin's Wife: ...

Police Penguin takes Mayor Penguin’s wife to a prison.

Mayor Penguin: ... Ow...

Mario: Can you open the gate to Starborn Valley?

Mayor Penguin: Sure!

Mario and Co. head to the gate and enter a new area that has...

Mario and Co: BOWSER JR!

Bowser Jr: Hooray for being one of the author's favorite characters! Now I have MORE HP!

Mario: Crud...


Mario: 40HP
Watt: 35HP
Bowser Jr: 85HP

Mario: Crud...

Mario defends!

Watt defends!

Bowser Jr. paints Fire Goop! The Fire Goop turns into a monster!

Fire Goop Monster: 50HP

Mario: Double crud...

Mario and Watt defend again!


Mario: 1HP PERIL!!! Watt: 1HP PERIL!!!

Bowser Jr: 1HP Fire Goop Monster: 1HP

Mario: That was stupid!

Bowser Jr: No it wasn't! Now it's Fire Goop Monster's turn!

Mario: Triple Crud... Wait...

Fire Goop Monster: ROAR!

Mario: 1 HP! PERIL!!!

Bowser Jr: HUH!?

Mario: Superguard!

Bowser Jr: Err...

Bowser Jr. paints something purple!

Purple Thing: Buh huh huh!

Mario: It's Lord Crump!

Lord Crump: Die!


Lord Crump: 29 HP

Mario: Now to kill the main boss!

Bowser Jr: CRUD!


Bowser Jr: 0 HP!
Fire Goop Monster: 0 HP!
Lord Crump: 0 HP!

Watt: Huh?

If Bowser Jr. is defeated, everyone is defeated.

Watt: Oh.


Bowser Jr: Ow... I'll have my revenge!

Bowser Jr. jumps away. Mario and Co. continue. They pass an area that has 6 snowmen, enter another area that has Frost Piranhas, and get to the end of that area, but...

Monstar: Roar! TuRn BaCk!

Mario: No way!

Monstar: Darn! Well... I tried!

Monstar turns into a bunch of Star Kids that fly away.

Mario: Uhh...

Mario and Co. enter Starborn Valley. They are then greeted by someone who resembles Merlon.

Mario: Are you Merlon?

Merle: No, I'm Merle, the son of Merlon.

Mario: Oh.

Merle: Now come to my house.

Mario and Co. follow Merle to his house while passing some interesting characters.

Sirok the Ukiki: Hi!

Ninji: Did you see a Star Kid?

Merle: We're here!

Mario and Co. enter the house.

Merle: Take this scarf!

Mario obtains a Scarf!

Mario: Neat!

Merle: I know it is.

Mario: I meant you need to make your house neater and cleaner!

Merle: ... Anyways, Mayor Penguin has a bucket you need.

Mario: Sweet!

Merle: ... What's so sweet about the bucket?

Mario: I mean this candy I'm eating is sweet!

Merle: ...

Mario and Co. leave, but...

???: DIE!

Mario and Co: Ow... X_X


Mario: Where are we?

??? 1: In our lord's castle!

Mario: Who is your lord?

??? 2: King Doopliss!

Mario: And who are you guys?

??? 1: I'm Nameless Minion #1!

??? 2: And I'm Nameless Minion #2!

??? 1: Anyways, why are you here!? There is a war going on!

Mario: What war?

??? 2: The Duplighost rebellion against the Crystal King!

Watt: We're here to defeat the Crystal King!

??? 1: REALLY!? Wait... Why would an outsider like you want to fight him?

Mario: To rescue the Star Spirit he has!

??? 2: We don't believe you! Unless you have some proof, we'll never let you leave!

Than a blurry Kalmar appears.

Kalmar: Mario! It's me, Kalmar! The Star Spirit! Now what's taking so long? I thought you were in the Crystal Palace now and almost to the Crystal King and Lemmy! Well I’ve got to go!

??? 1 and 2: O_O

Mario and Co: There's your proof!

??? 1: Ok! We'll let you leave!

??? 2: Go!

Mario and Co. leave. King Doopliss enters.

King Doopliss: What were you two yelling about?

??? 1 and 2: Nothing, sir!

King Doopliss: And if you guys are called Nameless Minion, why do you have ??? 1 and ??? 2 as your names?

??? 1 and 2: Err... We don't know.

King Doopliss: Strange minions I have.

Back to Mario and Co…

Mario: They’re castle is in Shiver City?

Watt: How come we didn't notice it before?

Lakilester: #@$@#^$&$@%@#$!@#%@$^*#. %*&#$^#@$$#@^%! (Maybe they used some sort of cloaking device. Hey, I'm speaking Shroob now!)

Mario: O_o? What did you say?

He said, "Maybe they used some sort of cloaking device. Hey, I'm speaking Shroob now!"

Mario: Oh.

Mario and Co. go to Mayor Penguin's house.

Mayor Penguin: Hello again, Mario!

Mario: Bucket?

Mayor Penguin: *eyes sort of closed* I see...

Mayor Penguin heads toward his cabinet and takes out a bucket.

Mayor Penguin: Overthrowing the king?

Mario: Yes?

Mayor Penguin: Good... Now put the bucket and scarf on the snowmen around Shiver Trail.

Mario: Ok.

Mario and Co. go to the snowmen and find 2 without a bucket or scarf.

Mario: I wonder...

Mario places a bucket on the snowman without a Bucket and puts a scarf on the snowman that doesn't have a scarf.

Snowmen: THANK YOU!

The snowmen move and make a path appear.

Mario: O_o? Snowmen that move and talk? That's new!

Mario and Co. enter and go through the Shiver Mountain Trail until they find a pit with a switch on the other side.

Mario: What do we do here?

Sushie: Throw a shell!

Mario: Good idea!

Mario looks through his pockets.

Mario: Got it!

Watt: Mario! That's not a shell! That's...

Mario throws whatever he was holding at the switch and activates it.

Watt: ... Your portable boat...

Mario: Still worked!

Mario and Co. continue while passing local idiots.

White Clubba: Duh...

Mario and Co. continue until they come to the base of the actual mountain. They see the entrance of the Crystal Palace HIGH up.

Mario: How are we going to get up there?

Watt: ...

Lakilester: ...

Sushie: ...

Mario: ...

While Mario and Co. think, someone appears.

Lemmy: Ok, guys! We have to make it in before Mario gets here!

Frost Piranha: Yes sir!

Buster Beetle: Sir! How are we going to get in?

Lemmy: How should I know? I barely even make any appearances in games anymore!

Frost Piranha: What about Super Princess Peach?

Lemmy: I was never even seen in that game! Why did you bring it up?

Frost Piranha: You were supposed to be the boss of World 3 in that game!

Lemmy: O_O

Ludwig: Gasp!

Larry: Gasp!

Morton: Gasp!

Bowser Jr: Gasp!

Peach: Gasp!

Bowser: Gasp!

Mario: Gasp!

Mario's Partners: Gasp!

Lemmy: What's with the gasping?! And where did you all come from anyways?!

Koopalings: We don't know!

Bowser Jr: I was already here!

Peach: I don't know!

Bowser: I like pie!

Mario and Co: We were already here also!

Lemmy: ...

Lemmy's Army: ...

Crystal King: Lemmy! You're late!

Lemmy: We have no way in!

Crystal King: Always with the excuses! Kids these days...

The Crystal King makes the Ice Stairs appear.

Crystal King: Now hurry up!

Lemmy and his army climb the stairs.

Mario: Look! There are stairs!

Mario and Co. climb the stairs and get Mega Smash on the way.

Mario: What do you think the Crystal Palace is like?

Watt: I think it's full of mirrors!

Lakilester: $%^#$%@#$@%#^#$&$%^*&#%^@%! (I think it's crawling with treasure!)

Sushie: I think it's very cold!

Mario and Co. enter only to find...

Mario and Co: O_o?

... The Crystal Palace is very hot (100 Degrees), doesn't have any mirrors, and has no treasure.

Mario: Excuse me, but what happened here?

Construction Koopa: Well we're on a job to get these mirrors for our boss!

Mario: Why?

Construction Koopa: To make his castle part fun house or something.

Crazy: HURRY UP! I want these mirrors now!

Mario and Co: ...

Mario and Co. continue through the door in the front wall and find a room with a key.

Mario: O_o? I read the guide for the original game! This isn't the right room!

The author is too lazy to find a map of the Crystal Palace. So live with the random rooms! The only rooms the author knows of is the Albino Dinos’ room, the Crystal King's room, and the Duplighost and Bombette room.

Mario: Oh.

Mario grabs the Blue Key that's in the room and goes through the Blue Door and finds a room with a few more Construction Koopas taking down the mirror. There are no Duplighosts since they are all rebelling against the Crystal King.

Mario: ... You know what? We could've just skipped this room entirely!

Mario and Co. go back and through the door in the back, and find another room only with an X-shaped board.

Mario: Hmm... Author! We have no way to continue!

Then P.T. comes in, grabs the Thwomp from earlier, and drops it on the floor.

Mario: Ok...

Mario and Co. go through the hole and find skeletons.

Mario: Huh?

Swoopula Ghost: The Crystal King never fed us and he stuffed us down into a place that no one can leave!

Mario: ...

Mario and Co. continue, find a P-Up, D-Down Badge (or was it P-Down, D-Up?), continue, and go through the door they entered earlier, only now they find some of the floor missing.

Mario: Let's go!

Mario and Co. jump down the hole and find the Red Key.

Mario: I know where this goes.

Mario and Co. continue, press the switch that changes the Blue Door into the Red Door, and continue. Next they find a few White Clubbas.

White Clubbas: Duh... You're Mario!

Mario: I jumped down the pit!

White Clubbas: Duh... Thanks, Mario!

Mario: ...

The White Clubbas jump down the hole, which makes their statues go down the hole.

Mario: Good thing the mirrors are gone!

Mario and Co. go through the door on the other side of the room and find another room without a mirror, and a switch.

Mario: ...

Mario goes through the crack with a bomb, grabs the Triple Dip, gets out, and goes through the door. Now Mario and Co. are in a room where they have to kick a Koopa shell.

Mario: I know...

Mario kicks a shell and...


Shell: I'm the real shell!

Shell: No I am!

Mario: I thought all the Duplighosts went against the Crystal King!

Shells: We're just lost.

The shells (AKA Duplighosts) go away.

Mario: Strange minions that guy has.

Mario and Co. continue and find a few more rooms only with Mini and Mega Albino Dino statues.

Mario: Hmm... I think if I push the small statue in the back, I'll be able to move the big one!

Mario does so and it works.

Mario: It worked! Now to go down the hole!

Mario and Co. go down the hole and find a Palace Key!

Mario: Great! We're almost out of here!

Mario and Co. go through the locked door and find 3 Albino Dinos, 3 Albino Dino Statues, and the door to the room before the Crystal King's room.

Albino Dino: You can't pass until you solve our puzzle! If you solve our puzzle, you'll be able to continue!

Mario: This is easy!

Mario pushes all the statues over the tiles and a staircase appears.

Mario: Yes!

Mario and Co. continue and heal. Mario and Co. are now in the Crystal King's arena.

Crystal King: So you have come at last?

Mario: What do you think?

Crystal King: Yes.

Mario: Right.

Lemmy: Just forget the talking and let's start fighting!


Mario: 45 HP
Watt: 40 HP
Crystal King: 70 HP
Lemmy: 30 HP DOUBLED! 60 HP

Mario: Why was Lemmy's HP doubled?

It's snowing!

Mario: Oh.

Watt: Electro Dash!
Crystal King: 65H P!

Crystal King: 55 HP

Mario: He's a pushover!

Crystal King: CRYSTAL BITS!
The Crystal Bits appear!
Circle Crystal Bit: 1 HP
Diamond Crystal Bit: 1 HP
Square Crystal Bit: 1 HP

Watt: 35 HP!

Watt: Thankfully, my mom was a Hot Head, so I don't get frozen easily!

Lemmy: Dang!

Crystal King: 45 HP

Crystal King has been paralyzed!
Lemmy has been paralyzed!
The Crystal Bits have been defeated!

Crystal King and Lemmy: DANG!

Mario: Good job, Watt! MEGA SMASH!
Crystal King: 35 HP!

Paralyze: 2 Turn(s) remain.

Crystal King: 25 HP!

Crystal King: Hey! How come my defense doesn't help?!

You think I¡®d be willing to do math? ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR MIND?!

Crystal King: ...

Watt: Electro Dash!
Crystal King: 20 HP!

Paralyze: 1 Turn(s) remain.

Crystal King: 10 HP!

Watt: Electro Dash! Crystal King: 5 HP!

Crystal King and Lemmy are no longer paralyzed!

Watt: Electro Dash! Crystal King: 0 HP!!!


The Crystal King melts into a puddle!

Lemmy: DANG!

Mario: Go Pokeball!

Mario throws a Pokeball that had a Sunflora!

Mario: Use Sunny Day!

Sunflora: Sunflora!

Lemmy: NOO!
Lemmy: 60 HP DIVIDED! 30HP!

Watt: Turbo Charge!
Mario's attack +1 for 3 turns!

Lemmy: Ball Toss!
Mario: 40 HP
Watt: 30 HP

Lemmy: 19 HP

Lemmy: I thought you weren't using math!

So what?

Lemmy: ...

Mario: Yay! The author is letting me win!

Watt: Electro Dash!
Lemmy: 14 HP

Lemmy: Freeze Gun!
Mario: 35 HP!

Lemmy: ... DANG! I forgot to add ice! Now it's just very cold water!

Mario: Bye, Lemmy! MEGA SMASH!
Lemmy: 4 HP!

Watt: Electro Dash!
Lemmy: 0 HP!!!



Puddle: Err...

Lemmy: ... NO! I can't take this! I'm too ashamed now!

Lemmy jumps off the cliff...

Mario: ...

Puddle: Uhh... Just take the Star Spirit.

Mario: Yes! Definitely NO explosion this time!

Then a Construction Koopa comes in.

Construction Koopa: YOU GUYS ARE STILL HERE?!

Mario: Yes!

Construction Koopa: We're blowing up the Crystal Palace!

Mario and Co. and Puddle: WHAT?!

Construction Koopa: The boss said now that we are done getting the mirrors, we can blow this place sky high!

Mario and Co. and Puddle: ...


Mario: AHH!

Sushie: AHH!

Watt: WEEE!!!

Lakilester: $###! (WEEE!)

Puddle: ...

End of Chapter:

Why am I still asking these questions? What's Lakilester's next speech type? Did Lemmy survive? Did the Crystal King reform? Find out in Chapter 5: Storming Koopa Bros. Fortress!

Read on!

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