CHAPTER 2: IN BOILING HOT WATER
G.G: Woah... Nice island. We can steal a thing or two from here.
Chompy: Bark!
G.G: I know, I know, the Star. Jeez, Chompy, you're as annoying as my mom.
Koopa 13: Come on, enough fooling around! We need to locate the next Elemental Star.
G.G: Right, right. Let's get going.
The three of them head off into the jungle and see a giant pond.
G.G: Oh great, a pond. How do we get across?
Koopa 13: My beautiful shell, duh!
Chompy: Bark bark!
G.G: Yeah, good point, Chompy. If we ride, your shell will sink faster than Lemmy’s career.
Drums play in the background.
G.G: Hey, let's use those drums to get across.
Koopa 13: Hey you, drum man! Get over here and help us out!
A Shy Suy comes over with his drums.
Drum Guy: What can I do for you?
G.G hits the drum guy over the head with a drumstick and knocks him out.
G.G: Right, let’s go before the cops come.
They float over the pond using the drums, and float into a river.
Koopa 13: A tad warm, isn’t it?
G.G: * gulp* Uhh, you may just cool off right now...
A waterfall is seen up ahead.
G.G: Ho-
Koopa 13: Ly-
Chompy: Bark.
They fall over the waterfall.
All: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!
G.G.: Hey, I wonder if I left Lemmy’s stove on?
Meanwhile at Bowser's castle...
Bowser: Oh boy…
The castle is on fire.
Bowser: Great. What now?
Mario: You can-a stay at my house.
Back at the waterfall, the three heroes wake up to find themselves in front of a village.
G.G: Sweet, I knew there was a place to loot from! I mean, hey! A village!
Koopa 13: What kind of village is this?
Chompy: Bark barkey bark.
G.G: Yeah, let’s find out.
They are about to head through the village gate when 2 Tribal Guys stand in front of them.
Tribal Guy: You cannot enter the village unless you have permission from the chief.
G.G: How about we use violence to solve this matter?
*Commence battle*
G.G: 30 HP
Koopa 13: 30
HP, 20 FP
Chompy: 20 hp,
20 FP
Vs.
Guard Guys: 10
HP each
G.G. uses Multibonk and does 7 damage.
Koopa 13 uses
Spin Shell and does 7 damage.
Guard Guy 1 defeated.
Chompy uses Crunch
and does 10 damage.
Guard Guy 2 defeated.
*END BATTLE*
Guard Guys: Ow man, impossible! Completely impossible!
Koopa 13: You guys were easy peasy!
The three enter the village.
G.G: Woah, look at this place. Not a Shy Guy you can’t miss.
Chompy: Bark!
G.G: Yeah, you're right, this village most likely has a village leader who knows about the Star. I bet he’s fat, ugly, hideous, and-
?? : Eh hem.
The village leader is standing right behind them.
G.G: And down-right good looking.
Leader Guy: May I ask what brings you rude citizens to this village?
Koopa 13: We want answers about the Elemental Star. Do you know what it is?
Leader Guy: Of course we know what it is. Come back to my hut, I’ll explain.
They head inside the hut filled with gold.
G.G: Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, it's heaven!!!
Leader Guy: Now then, about the Elemental Star. You see, it is here: look out that window.
Outside the window is a skull-shaped rock on top of a big mountain.
Leader Guy: Inside that skull-shaped rock is the ancient realm of our water god, Skullar.
Koopa 13: Is it an easy entrance?
Leader Guy: Ha! You wish. Only those chosen by Skullar can enter the skull realm, where his treasure, the water stone, resides.
G.G: So all we gotta do is get an acceptance from Mr. Skull God and we're in?
Leader Guy: Right, so, if you want to get in you must stand on one foot while wearing a dress and singing the-
Koopa 13: Are you suggesting we have to dress as a bride?
Leader Guy: Well yes, but…
G.G: FORGET THAT!
He kicks Leader Guy and knocks him out.
G.G: Now grab all the loot you can and let’s get out of here!
Koopa 13: Right on!
Chompy: Bark bark?
G.G: I know, I didn’t forget the stone, just grab the-
Guard Guys: There they are! They're the guys that beat us up and barged in without permission!
Koopa 13: Oh no! Run!
They jump out the window and out of the village while being chased by a village of Shy Guys. The Shy Guys corner the three heroes at Skull Rock.
Koopa 13: We're trapped.
G.G: Wait, what are we doing?
G.G. pulls out the Fire Star and burns the Shy Guys to a crisp.
Koopa 13: Wow! These Stars are just way too good for us.
G.G: I wonder what the others can do? Only one way to find out.
They approach Skull Rock.
Skullar: WHO DARES APPROACH ME?
G.G: Just a couple of schmoes looking for the Elemental Star.
Skullar: WHAT? YOU DARE TO STEAL MY TREASURE?
Koopa 13: This treasure is very important, and we need it.
Skullar: WELL TOO BAD IT’S MINE AND YOU CAN'T HAVE IT, UNLESS…
Chompy: Bark?
Skullar: UNLESS YOU GIVE ME ALL THAT LOOT OF YOURS!
G.G: No way! It's our loot, you can’t…
Chompy takes all the loot and gives it to Skullar.
Koopa 13: CHOMPY!
Chompy: Bark bark!
G.G: What do you mean the world is more important? What are you, a hippie?
Skullar: VERY GOOD I AM PLEASED WITH YOUR OFFERING!
He opens his mouth and reveals the entrance.
Koopa 13: Well let’s get in so my shell can tackle those monsters.
Dark Buzzy: Thank you, morons, for opening the gate!
He runs inside.
Koopa 13: It’s one of the dark guys we met at the castle!
G.G: Quick! To the Batmobile!
Koopa 13: WHAT?!
G.G: Oh, uh, never mind. Let's get after him!
They enter the cave.
Chompy: Bark bark.
G.G.: Yeah, I can't see anything either. Oh, wait, we have the Fire Stone.
G.G. raises the Fire Stone and a light shines and lights up the room, revealing a million Swoopers on the ceiling.
G.G: Hey, rats with wings! Do you know where the Elemental Star is?
Swooper: WHAT?!
G.G: The Elemental Star! Where is it?
Swoopers: WHAT?
Koopa 13: Can you hear us?
Swopper: WHAT?
Koopa 13: Arggghhh! I’m mad!
G.G: We noticed. CAN YOU HEAR US?!
Swooper: WE CANT HEAR YOU! WE HAVE NO EARS, USE MORSE CODE!!!
G.G: I DON’T KNOW HOW TO DO THAT!!! Do any of you guys know how to use morse code?
Koopa 13: I don’t know.
Chompy starts making weird bat sounds.
G.G: Apparently Chompy somehow knows.
Swooper: Oh, the stone thing. Yeah, it's down there.
Chompy makes more bat sounds.
Swooper: Yeah, it's that dark cave over there that's hard to see in.
G.G: Hmm... Looks like he’s talking about this cavern. All right, then we'll just step through and...
G.G. kicks Koopa 13 down the dark cavern and into the hole.
G.G.: How is it down there?
Koopa 13: Terrible!
G.G: Good to hear!
Koopa 13 jumps angrily up and down on his feet.
Koopa 13: It is not good! You hear me?!
G.G. sees a ladder, and he and Chompy climb down.
G.G: Oh, look, there was a ladder. Looks like we didn’t have to push you after all!
Koopa 13: How nice for you!
They light the way and walk down a pathway and find themselves on a boat that crosses to the other side, where the stone is.
Koopa 13: This boat has no oars! How are we supposed to paddle?
A giant Blooper comes out from the water and starts to come at them, ready to attack the three heroes. G.G. jumps out of the boat and starts pushing it to the other side, where they get out of the boat and head into the cavern were the stone is.
G.G.: Phew! Close one! Now where is that Star?
The three of them spot Dark Buzzy Beetle trying to take the stone.
Koopa 13: Hey! That is ours!
Dark Buzzy: Huh? Oh, it’s you guys. Sorry but you ain’t getting this stone. Once I get out of here I'll break it to pieces!
Chompy: Bark!
Dark Buzzy: Oh yeah? You and what army?
G.G. is suddenly standing behind Dark Buzzy Beetle, and kicks him.
Dark Buzzy: Hey! How dare you strike me? I am one of the Dark Beings! Do you think you can beat me?
G.G: Umm, yeah. You're a Buzzy Beetle. Of course we think that!
Dark Buzzy: I am one of the Dark Beings who will rule this land! I cannot be beaten by losers like you! Prepare yourselves for defeat!
*COMMENCE BATTLE*
G.G: 40 HP
Koopa 13: 40
HP
Chompy: 30 HP
Vs.
Dark Buzzy: 20
HP
G.G: Only 20 HP? Wow, what a weakling!
Dark Buzzy: I make up for my low HP by using my skill! Watch this!
He suddenly sprouts wings and a spike, and flies into the air.
Dark Buzzy: Hah hah! Didn’t see that one coming, huh?
G.G. uses Bonk
and loses 1 HP.
Koopa 13: G.G,
you aren’t supposed to bonk an enemy with a spike on top! G.G: Yeah, I
kind of figured that out.
Koopa 13: Fire
Stone emerge!
He pulls out
the Star and uses Fire Blast and does 10 damage.
Chompy tries to use the Fire Blast but nothing happens.
Dark Buzzy: What’s wrong? Out of ammo? Muhahahaha!
Koopa 13: And out of luck, beetle breath.
Dark Buzzy: Your confidence is charming, but unless you learn how to recharge the stone, you are done for!
G.G: What do we do?
Koopa 13: Wait until it comes back.
G.G: What, until we die? We need to think of something else.
Koopa 13: Dark Buzzy, can you give us some time to think?
Dark Buzzy: Okey dokie. WAIT, WHAT?
They go behind the stage for five minutes and come out.
G.G: Ha! We figured it out.
G.G. uses Fire
Blast and does 10 damage.
Dark Buzzy defeated.
*END OF BATTLE*
Dark Buzzy: But how? How did you...
G.G: Easy, we just had to get a bunch of support from our fans, and it powered up, although it took a while. Hint hint.
Koopa 13: I think so.
Chompy: Ruff ruff.
G.G: Yeah, let’s grab the Star.
G.G. walks up to Dark Buzzy and takes the Water Star.
Koopa 13: Now it’s time to get out, right?
The Star lights up and the three heroes disappear.
Dark Buzzy: Hey, get back here! I’m not done yet!
The giant Blooper comes in and glares at the Buzzy Beetle.
Dark Buzzy: Oh boy…