Chapter 21: The Somewhat Challenging; kind of Easy; but mostly Hard Part
We pick up where Chapter 20 left off, right after Yoshi’s line.
Kamek: Happies! Now we can change the future with the help of this comic! And now the author doesn’t have to write “future” before everyone’s names anymore!
Yoshi: But it’s not finished.
Kamek looks and sees that nothing is in the speech bubbles. They walk to the edge and think, while the chapter’s name appears on the buildings in the distance.
Kamek: We don’t know what we’re saying in it!
Yoshi: We shood ask Mistah Van Gough!
Kamek: “Should” and “Van Gore”.
He gets up to the ledge and holds his hands out.
Yoshi: DONUT WORRY, MUSHROOM CITY! WE SAVE YOU!
Guy that yelled at Yoshi in Chapter 1: Shut up, my kid’s taking a nap! Again!
Kamek: And it’s “Do not”.
Meanwhile, Dimentio is in the Nolastname Mansion, drawing in the living room. He’s drawing Mushroom City on fire. He looks out the window to see Bleck and Tippi headed for the door. But they don’t live there. Oh well. Teck and Bleck Jr. come to the door to get hugs. Remember, those are Bleck’s kids. Teck is a rainbow caterpillar and Bleck Jr. is a mini Bleck in normal clothes. When Teck reaches puberty, he’ll be a rainbow cocoon. Dimentio looks to see Mimi at the top of the stairs, jealous of the attention.
Goomba: Uh, I’m only talking to give the author a break from typing actions with no lines.
Thanks. Soon, Dimentio’s Mom and Mimi are packing, but Mimi still doesn’t want to go. Dimentio comes in.
Dimentio’s Mom: I’ll let you say your goodbyes.
She leaves.
Dimentio: You can’t leave! Our meeting, you being my metaphorical-or-something niece, it can’t be random! You’re here to save the world!
Mimi: Yeah, whatever. “Save the transforming spider thingy, save the world.”
Dimentio: I mean it! I’ll blow up in the future like a nuclear Bob-omb!
Mimi: Like Bowser?
Dimentio: Whoser?
Meanwhile in a used car lot in Rose Town, Bowser puts his hand on the hood of a car to melt snow off of it. At a payphone, Toad is trying to call, but Gadd puts it on the hook.
Gadd: We can’t risk them finding us.
Toad: But I have a wife! And a little spore! … That’s what Toads call their unborn babies. I want to at least be able to say goodbye!
Gadd: So do I, but-
Toad: You want to say goodbye to my family?
Gadd: No-
Toad: You call your unborn babies spores?
Gadd: No-
Toad: You have a wife?
Gadd: Yes, and a daughter, and a son, and a goldfish! But they have this system in Mushroom City that doesn’t use isotopes. They just find you where you are. So we’ve been using back roads and switching cars.
Bowser sends some heat into the engine and it starts as Gadd gets into the driver’s seat and Toad gets into the passenger’s seat.
Bowser: Aww, I wanted shotgun!
Meanwhile, King Boo stops painting and sees it’s of him ambushing Bowser.
King Boo: Hmm… Do I take his power? If I do, will I blow up? Is that the future you had for me? That’s dumb!
Meanwhile, Kooper is in his apartment and answers his phone.
Kooper: Hello?
King Boo’s voice: Can you hear me now?
Kooper: Yes.
King Boo’s voice: Good.
They hang up. It rings again.
Kooper: Hello?
King Boo’s voice: It’s me, King Boo! And I think I’m going to do something bad.
Kooper: What?! What are you going to do?
King Boo’s voice: I’m gonna kill more people. It made sense before! I was taking powers! I mean I’ll kill superpowered people, so I can justify it with evolution, but I don’t want to kill off tons of innocent people!
Kooper starts dialing on another phone.
Kooper: Uhhhh, maybe you should come over or something?
King Boo: I have super hearing, remember? I can hear you dialing a number! Are you calling the police?!
Kooper’s voice: Uh, no? Yeah, I’m calling the pizza man! Yeah, let’s go with that!
King Boo hangs up and focuses on the painting. Meanwhile, Tatanga is in his living room and mad.
Tatanga: He’s gone, and it’s all your fault!
Elder: I told Don that he couldn’t do it, but somehow he did!
Tatanga: Yeah right! I’m through with you, and I’m getting Shroob myself!
He leaves. Elder looks into the mirror.
Princess Shroob: Go with him! He’ll die if he’s alone! This could be your last chance to save my son!
Elder: Ugh, fine!
Meanwhile in a hotel room in Mushroom City, Shroob is playing video games. In the room behind him, Ms. Mowz (posing as Princess Shroob) is on the phone.
Ms. Mowz/Princess Shroob: I think this is wasting my talents, babysitting this kid… Okay, Don.
She hangs up and goes into the other room.
“Princess Shroob”: That was the Don.
Shroob: I don’t like him. He smells weird. I don’t want to help him!
(I didn’t make up that line about smelling weird.)
“Princess Shroob”: We don’t have a choice.
The camera zooms out the window and to the plaza outside. Kooper walks up to Mr. Game & Watch.
Mr. Game & Watch: Beep boop bip!
Kooper: Am I ready to work for you? No. I need access to all your resources so I can stop King Boo.
Mr. Game & Watch: Honk!
Kooper: Why should you agree? Because my dad knew more than you. He had the formula to make the list. You need me, $!^$#(*.
Mr. Game & Watch: Ringringring!
Kooper: That’s right, people got a game over because I led King Boo to them, so I blame myself. A vigilante if you will. And ha! I got in!
Soon, Kooper and Mr. Game & Watch are in a room with computers and a microscope.
Kooper: Where is this?
Mr. Game & Watch: Ring!
Kooper: I need to meet that Shy Guy girl from around the time Toad first appeared in the story? Say, she was on the list!
Mr. Game & Watch: Honk, honk!
Kooper: My dad led King Boo right to them, and he killed her parents and attacked her…. Don’t rub it in. But you got to her in time and protected her? That’s nice.
He sees a sample of vim on a computer screen.
Kooper: Oh my DAD, is this hers? She needs to get to a hospital!
Mr. Game & Watch: Beep, beep!
Kooper: That won’t help? It’s a nervous system thing that keeps her from using her powers and there’s only been one case of this before, ever? And you say it was a boy from Koopa Village? … That was my brother! But he died…
Mr. Game & Watch: Boop bip beep bop!
Kooper: My father developed a cure but was a few months late? And the kid will die because you don’t know what it is?
They look at a glass wall and see that inside is a hospital room with the Shy Guy girl reading on a bed. I don’t know exactly, but it may be the room where Toad and Agent Goomba Boss saw the Yoshi bone scientist that was burnt badly a long time ago in the story.
Kooper: So you’re going to put me on a guilt trip by showing me a little girl that’ll die if I don’t give you what you want? King Boo is going to kill tons of people if you don’t get off your flat butt and do something!
Mr. Game & Watch: Beep!
Kooper: You’re saying she’s the only one who can help?
Meanwhile in Vincent’s old apartment, King Boo is in the bathroom on the phone. He’s just hiding in there, he’s not using it.
King Boo: Hey, I was thinking about the future, and can I come and visit?
Meanwhile, Yoshi and Kamek enter the studio.
Kamek: It’s two days until the election! Do you think you can handle this?
Yoshi: A hero’s path always goes through darkness, but he end with light.
They look and see Vincent’s dead body.
Yoshi: Mistah Van Gore! Yoshi! Wooow! Hah! Hmmmmm!!! (Mistah Van Gore! This is what I saw when I went into the future for the first time! I saw his body like that and BOOM!)
They hear the sound of a toilet flushing, and the two flinch because they think it’s the explosion. In the bathroom…
King Boo: It’s never a complete murder and takeover of a guy’s house until you flush all his toilet paper down the drain!
Back outside the restroom…
Yoshi and Kamek run and hide behind a portrait. King Boo floats out of the bathroom. It’s not a superpower. He always floats. Yoshi sees him. He looks at the picture of him egging King Boo in the comic, then at King Boo himself. He goes back and forth for a while, then makes the connection. He shows Kamek this connection and Kamek gulps. King Boo hears that.
King Boo: Hello?
He listens and hears two fast heartbeats.
King Boo: I can hear you.
He walks up to a portrait and removes it to find P.T. eating chips. P.T. looks up. He doesn’t seem to know King Boo is a serial killer.
P.T.: I’m not sharing these.
King Boo: You’re not who I’m after.
He continues searching and comes up to the one with Yoshi and Kamek. He removes it to find no one there. Meanwhile, Yoshi and Kamek appear at a convenience store next door.
Kamek: That was too close!
They walk out of the store, and King Boo floats right by them.
Kamek: *Kamek noises* (There he is! Get him!)
Yoshi: Waah! (Why?!)
Kamek: *Kamek noises* (You’re supposed to end his game! It’s your destiny!)
They start to follow. Meanwhile, Tatanga phases Elder and himself into Don’s gallery. They see a painting of Shroob in the hotel with fire around him.
Tatanga: That looks like he’s in Mushroom City.
Elder: Hey!
Elder goes over to a group of small pictures with information about Tatanga and Princess Shroob’s life.
Tatanga: So he orchestrated the creation of our son, Shroob? He put us together for that? Don’s been messing with our lives?! THAT’S MESSED UP!
Kool-Aid Man: Oh yeah!
Tatanga sees a calendar.
Tatanga: “Fly to Mushroom City. Bleck election.”
Elder: Okay, let’s go!
Meanwhile, Kooper walks into the Shy Guy girl’s hospital room with a vial.
Kooper: I need to take some vim. Which will be odd since Shy Guys are mostly suits on the outside.
Kooper starts drawing the vim.
Kooper: I’m going to stop that guy that hurt your family.
Shy Guy Girl: But he’s the boogeyman! He sees into your soul and eats your brain!
Kooper: Uhhhh, boogeyman… Yeah…. Well you can help us stop him with your superpower. I hear it’s amazing.
Shy Guy Girl: All I do is find them when they tell me to.
Kooper: You can find people?
Shy Guy Girl: Yeah, I think about them and I know where they are.
Kooper: Okay. That’s good because the “boogeyman” likes hiding. I know you can’t use your power, but what I’m doing should help.
Meanwhile, Dimentio, Bleck, and Mimi meet in Bleck’s office at Castle Bleck.
Mimi: He came after my dad, wanted answers, and blew up my house.
Dimentio: See, Bleck? Maybe this other guy’s the bomb!
Bleck: But in your dream-
Dimentio: I dreamed I could fly, but then it turned out you could instead!
Mimi: You can fly?
Bleck: Yeah.
Mimi: Cool, I guess.
Dimentio: Now pick up the phone and call the FBI so they can find Bowser!
Bleck: Fine.
Dimentio and Mimi leaves. Bleck dials.
Bleck: Don, there’s a problem.
Meanwhile in a hallway in an old apartment building, King Boo is carrying a box. Yoshi and Kamek are watching from a window at the end of the hall. King Boo knocks on the door and his mom answers!
Queen Mother Boo: Oh! My little Boo’s home!
BTW, Queen Mother is what you call the mother of the king. She hugs her son.
King Boo: Hi Mom.
Yoshi and Kamek make weird faces of shock.
Kamek: WHAAAAAT?!
Yoshi: His mom?!
In their living room, there are snow globes everywhere. King Boo gives his mom a box.
King Boo: Oh, this is for your collection.
Queen Mother Boo: Oh, a globe of Diamond City! Look, there are tiny little people running around inside.
Meanwhile inside the snow globe, you can see Pikmin running around, taking on the roles of every person that lives in the real Diamond City. Literally. No exaggerations. Back with King Boo and his mom…
King Boo: And the clock on the wall is broken.
QMB: I know.
King Boo takes it and starts messing with it.
QMB: Well I’m glad you could see the world.
King Boo: I think I’ll stay home for a while.
QMB: Why?
King Boo: Because.
QMB: Okay, let me just fix you a ham sandwich.
King Boo: That’s okay.
Regardless, she’s getting ham from the fridge.
QMB: You know if you’re gonna stay a while, you should think about that job from that guy.
King Boo: I fix watches.
QMB: You don’t have to do something just because your dad always said you did.
King Boo: I’m good.
QMB: But-
King Boo: You’re not listening!
QMB: I am!
King Boo: Nuh-uh! You’re making a ham sandwich! I said I didn’t want one!
QMB: Fine! Geez!
She shoves the sandwich back into the fridge. He floats over to his mom and tries to put his hand on her… Do boos have shoulders? Well if she had one, his hand would be on it.
QMB: Don’t touch me!
King Boo: I’m sorry! Maybe being normal is fine, though!
QMB: But you could be the king if you wanted.
King Boo: King Boo.
QMB: We’re not real royalty! Nintendo just put those names there to make us legitimate bosses! I mean a real king! The Mushroom Kingdom’s king!
Meanwhile, Dimentio and Mimi are talking as they enter Bleck’s office. Or they would, if Mimi didn’t grab him and shove him away. Bleck is talking to Mr. Game & Watch.
Mimi: (whispering) That flat guy is the one trying to find me!
In the office…
Bleck: The Don doesn’t have a grasp on this situation! People think I’ll lose! And now my friend is telling me there’s a radioactive Koopa named Bowser!
Mr. Game & Watch: Bip!
Bleck: You know about him?
In the hall…
Mimi: That flat guy can’t find me here after what my dad did!
Dimentio: But wait, he’s with Bleck so maybe we can trust him!
Mimi: But he let everyone think I’m dead! And that flat guy is working for the company that’s after me! You don’t know what’s going on!
In the office…
Bleck: Of course I’m nervous! You want to blow up half of Mushroom City!
Outside…
Mimi: You’re scared!
Dimentio: Yeah! I have to find a nuclear guy I don’t know and keep in all that power! I can’t run away because then no one would save everyone! Come with me!
Mimi: I can’t!
She leaves and Dimentio follows. Meanwhile, “Princess Shroob” walks in to find Shroob watching TV.
“Princess Shroob”: I’m going to hit the showers.
Shroob: Okay. Sorry for talking back.
“Princess Shroob”: It’s fine.
As soon as she’s in, Shroob silently goes to the door and uses his power on the security pad and runs down the hall and goes through the door at the end to find himself in the same room. He keeps trying this for a while and eventually stops when he sees Ms. Mowz come out. She’s wearing a towel around her eyes because nobody is allowed to see what she looks like without her red-orange mask or her normal mask.
Shroob: And you are?
Ms. Mowz: I work for the Don. I can make you see things you like. And if you don’t behave I can show you things that’ll scar you for eternity.
Shroob: Like what?
Ms. Mowz shows Shroob a flashcard of Chuck Norris without a beard.
Shroob: Aaaah!
Ms. Mowz: And that’s just with the chin blown out of detail by an airbrush! Now do as I say!
Shroob: Fine…
Meanwhile, QMB is washing dishes while King Boo sits at the kitchen table.
King Boo: But what if to be special, I had to hurt a lot of people?
QMB: Oh, you could never hurt anyone.
King Boo: Oh? Watch this.
King Boo goes over to the sink and uses The Force to throw the brush thing into another room, freezes the water, and then uses The Force to mess with it so it’s like a snowglobe.
QMB: Ooh.
King Boo starts evilly smiling and makes all the snow globes fly in a circle. And for some reason a witch on a bicycle is flying around as well. Then a snow globe smashes into QMB’s cheek.
QMB: Ow!
Meanwhile, Kooper is unsuccessfully looking through a microscope and then angrily shoves papers off a desk. The Shy Guy girl comes in.
Shy Guy Girl: You can’t help me, can you?
Kooper: Well if I could find an antibody, maybe I could.
They start picking up the papers. The girl picks up a picture of Kooper’s parents with Koops.
Kooper: Wow, that’s the first time I’ve seen my brother. He got a game over before I was hatched.
SGG: Will I get a game over?
Kooper: No, I don’t plan on being a month late.
SGG gives him a picture of a Grand Star.
SGG: It’ll protect you from the boogeyman.
Kooper: Oh, we’re still going by that?
Meanwhile, King Boo is banging on a (ghost-proof) door.
King Boo: Mom, I said I’m sorry!
Outside, Yoshi and Kamek are watching through QMB’s window.
Yoshi: Aww, she’s sad.
Kamek: What are you waiting for? Kill King Boo while you can!
Yoshi: I can’t do that without asking for forgiveness! It’s against Yoshido code!
Kamek: King Boo is a killer! He must die!
cd-i Ganondorf: You DARE bring light into my lair?! YOU MUST DIE!
Kamek: Future you could do it!
Inside…
King Boo: Mom, come on! I saw the future and I don’t want to kill billions of innocent people. Can’t you understand?!
Outside…
Yoshi: Future me forgot that killing should be hard!
Kamek: But King Boo kills me! On the explosion date!
Yoshi: Hmm.
Inside, QMB opens her door.
QMB: I’m leaving. When I come back, I want you to be gone.
King Boo: But-
QMB: Get out of my house!
King Boo: But-
QMB: Give me my real son back!
King Boo leaves, then comes right back.
QMB: Nice try.
King Boo: But-
QMB pulls out a pair of scissors and floats toward King Boo.
King Boo: Oh come on! Don’t you think you’re overreacting a little, Mom?
King Boo tries to take them.
QMB: Get away!
They fight over them and the scissors somehow turn around and end up stabbing QMB.
QMB: I’m coming, Elizabeth!
She dies and time stops. Yoshi comes in and pulls out the egg. A flashing X appears over King Boo.
Yoshi: Sorry.
Time continues as QMB dies even though she’s a ghost. And Yoshi throws the egg at King Boo. But King Boo catches it.
King Boo: Hey, you were in that loft earlier! Why are you following me?!
Yoshi: Uh, to end your game?
King Boo: Then go for it! You can’t, can you?
The part of the egg King Boo is holding freezes over and he squeezes a hole into it.
King Boo: Now I need to kill you!
Kamek bursts in.
Kamek: Not so fast!
Yoshi reaches over and warps the two of them away. King Boo then looks over at his dead mom.
King Boo: Ooh… Sorry about that. I didn’t mean to.
Meanwhile, Kooper hangs a bag of vim on SGG’s IV stand.
SGG: You found it?
Kooper: Yeah, it was in me. Sometimes if parents have a sick baby, the healthy one has the antibodies that can stop it. Except I wasn’t born until it was too late.
Meanwhile, Yoshi and Kamek appear in Vincent’s old studio.
Kamek: Well?
Yoshi: I failed!
P.T.: Aww, do you want my chips?
Yoshi: No.
P.T.: Good, ‘cause I finished them all.
Kamek: Well we still have two days!
Yoshi: He broke my egg!
He holds up the egg. There’s a hole in it. Meanwhile, Dimentio takes a mini Bill Blaster from one of Bleck’s drawers and goes into the foyer. He sees Mimi coming down the stairs with a suitcase.
Stuffwell: Happies, I get another appearance!
Dimentio: You’re not going to say goodbye?
Mimi: Goodbye.
Dimentio: I figured out how you can help.
He gives her the mini Bill Blaster.
Dimentio: I’ll be able to take Bowser, but if not, you’re the only one who can get close enough to me if I lose control! You should aim for the place where the piece of glass was.
Mimi: What?!
Dimentio: The bomb is going to happen, Mimi!
Mimi: How do you know?!
He shows her the pictures of Mushroom City on fire, and one is of Bowser’s face.
Mimi: Bowser?
Dimentio: This is outside Mushroom Plaza. He must be in town, so you need to help. Get me if necessary!
Meanwhile in Bleck’s campaign HQ, Dimentio’s Mom comes in.
Dimentio’s Mom: The Don called me. Are you getting cold feet?
Bleck: I have no feet.
Dimentio’s Mom: It’s a figure of speech.
Bleck: Oh. Do you know his plans?
Dimentio’s Mom: Yes. They’re not just his.
Bleck: You’re going to sacrifice your son so I can be the king of the Mushroom Kingdom?! I can’t accept this!
Dimentio’s Mom: Oh have some faith, will you? Your destiny is to lead the world after this happens! They’ll see the strength and conviction of the First Ever Mario Villain To Be A Count Instead Of A King Or Something, and reward you by making you their king! Can’t you be the one we need?
Bleck: Fine.
Meanwhile in QMB’s apartment, King Boo is painting the explosion with his mom’s vim.
King Boo: You were right! I can be a real king if I want!
Meanwhile in Mushroom Plaza, Mimi is sitting at the fountain as Dimentio comes up.
Dimentio: I couldn’t find Bowser. Is something wrong?
Mimi: Well I ruined everything when I tried to be normal. But when I met you it was all good.
Dimentio: Same here.
Mimi: … Dad?
Dimentio looks to see Gadd, Toad, and Bowser. Mimi runs up to Gadd.
Mimi: I missed you!
Gadd: I missed me too.
Toad: How can you miss yourself?
Gadd: I don’t know.
Dimentio walks up too, and his hands start glowing red.
Dimentio: Oh noes! Mimi!
Bowser: Huh?
Gadd: Bowser, he’s absorbing your superpower.
Toad: You know the three of us should try out for a buddy movie sometime... Anyway, I think he needs to stop.
Dimentio’s hands start shaking. He’s struggling all over.
Dimentio: A little help?!
Dimentio: Oh come on!